And Jabez called on the God of Israel, saying, “Oh that Thou wouldest bless me indeed and enlarge my borders, and that Thine hand might be with me and that Thou wouldest keep me from evil, that it may not grieve me!”

And God granted him that which he requested.

1 Chronicles 4:10

One of the worst words one can hear when applying for a job is that “you didn’t make it” or “you failed” or better yet “you’re not qualified for the role”. How does one feel when you got rejected for a job you’ve applied for and feels that this was supposed to be for you?

I know I felt disappointed. I just didn’t accept it immediately but deep in my heart, I felt bad that after 5 months of taking over the role as department OIC, the company I am working for will get someone external for the manager role.

The funny part of this whole fiasco is that I had 3 good offers from other companies as assistant manager or lead roles and I declined them because I wanted this one badly.

I shared these sentiments to some of my friends and they felt bad and I seemed to succumbed to the idea that perhaps I needed to move out, resign and take on another leadership role from another company. Most of my friends and colleagues wanted me to do that instantly so that the management would feel the void I will leave behind. But at the end of the day, I decided not to. That is not who I am and in all of these challenges, I am still secure with my identity in Christ. Whatever may had happened was for a purpose. I may never know how I will move on with this but I know, I am secured when God audibly said to me a couple of weeks ago to “stay.”

One might ask, was it a wrong decision to decline and at the end of the road, will not be able to take on the role that you’ve worked so hard for? I would honestly say that it’s not. It is part of the process of what we call “growing”. We take on the decision with the ideals of what can happen and what can’t and we have to live with it. But when we weigh things down, we know that we have to pray about it and ask people’s advice and see how it goes.

For the last 3 weeks was a challenge when I had to:

1.) Seek the Lord in prayer – understanding that this is one crucial decision to resign or stay, I sought the Lord’s comfort through praying. I felt that when everything seems uncertain, the very first person who can hear me clearly and will not scold me with all my rants is my Daddy God. Did it help? Yes, it did.

2.) I talked to my family – I talked it out with my mama, my spiritual parents, my twin brother and with close friends. The talk was long, the silence were longer. But at the end of my discussions with them. Here’s their take on it – “is it going to be more stressful than what you are experiencing now?”, “stay put and wait for it”, “have you prayed and fasted about it?”

3.) I meditated and had to go away from the noise – both from the reasons of my friends and inside me. I had to lock myself in my room, just listen to music and dwell with the situation. I have to be honest, it was hard at first but with God’s sustaining grace, I came out of that room alive and back to where I want to be – in His perfect will and love.

So, what happens now?

I have to be honest in sharing that I did apply for a couple of openings that I found online. I had a couple of interviews within the 3 weeks waiting, I got job offers and I have been invited to do a face to face interview with the recruitment directors. These seems to be a positive outcome after a disappointing experience.

But again, the inner self heard the Lord saying “stay.” I have to be so stubborn as not to intentionally listen to what God is saying inside of me that I had to do it on my own and the result seemed to be favorable on my end. And yet, deep down inside, I felt the uneasiness and doubt if I am doing the right thing. If I am in God’s perfect will for me or am I doing my own thing again.

With much self-reflection, prayer time and following my instinct, I decided to go on a different route. I asked my Directors to move me in the marketing department – which by the way, is something I am also good at. Although it will be on the same level as to where I am, at least, I won’t be handling 18 people and my targets are not numbers but projects being implemented. I was also given the assurance that I’ll take on a bigger role later on with the organization once alignment will be done early next year.

You’ll probably wonder why do this instead of resign. Remember when God said “stay”?, I knew that I will not get the post but he had another plan for me. I talked this out to my twin brother and after 20 minutes talk and brotherly advice, I finally decided to stay and take on another route.

Am I at peace with my decision? I am certain I want this but I am assured with God’s promise that He knows better than what I want to. He is good and He is my father.

In ending this post, let me leave you with the best learning this season and that is – “there is no perfect place to be than to be in the will of our Daddy God.” Joseph had to stay in the dungeon for 40 years before the fulfillment of his dream. Jacob had to stay in Bethel for God to confirm His covenant promise to his family. Moses had to leave the old season in the wilderness to fulfill his destiny. Peter and the disciples had to leave their old jobs to follow Jesus to learn from Him.

I have to listen and obey God for me to know I am in His perfect will for this season. Will it be easy? I doubt it will be but I already saw what lies ahead, and I know He will be with me and will guide me all the way.

Thank you for reading and God bless!

A week after new year, I had the chance to travel to Manila and then to Palawan for some getaway. I was out for a week in the office and it was a needed vacation for me I guess.

First off, I traveled to Manila and stayed there for a day. My cousin and I had a business date and settled in their loving couch for more than 3 hours to finalize a business presentation for Rova Tours.

Just a quick background, Rova Tours is a start-up travel agency business of my tito and tita (Roy and Nova Silva). I joined the team 2nd half of last year. I slowly transitioned to a consultancy role and for just this month, took over as head of the business.

So, if you are looking for a good place to go for a quick rest, please visit us at http://www.rovatours.com or our Facebook page at Rova Tours and inquire about so many stuff that we offer. And this view below is just one of so many!

So, if you are looking for someone to book you somewhere, please don’t hesitate to contact me! I’ll post more pics of my travel on my next blog post.

Another good verse is from Galatians 4:7 which shares that we “…are no longer a slave, but a son; and if a son, then an heir through God.”

This is how I felt and received while I reflected and pondered for these past few days. And it allowed me to understand that life is a mixture of different things and yet my father in heaven remains the same – yesterday, today and forever. This is the assurance I have in Him and for him alone.

I hope you will experience the acceptance and love from our heavenly father as it resonates in this beautiful song of a son engrossed with the goodness of God:

Here’s the interview clip of Chris Tomlin about the song and how it brought impact to many of those who have heard this song.

Here are additional trivia of the songs taken from Songfacts:

• The original composer and singers were  Pat Barrett and Tony Brown
• Released as a single, Tomlin’s version debuted at #1 on Billboard’s Christian Digital Songs chart, the worship singer’s fourth leader on the tally
• Local Atlanta act Housefires originally recorded “Good Good Father” on their 2014 Housefires II album
• Other artists that have recorded the song include Casting Crowns, Big Daddy Weave and Zealand Worship.
• This won Song of the Year at the 2016 Dove Awards.
• Pat Barrett was originally inspired by his own role as a father to write the song and was quoted in CBN “When I started having kids and I’m looking at my daughter Harper Gray, and I’m like, ‘How am I going to explain God to you?'”

If you are also want to know more about the band Housefires, click here – Housefires.

What about you? How is your heart doing? Any good songs to recommend for reflections and just maybe, help someone with their experiences by encouraging them through a song.

A good friend and co-worker asked me why am I being melancholic and asked me “What or who did you remember recently?”

And I blurted out aloud “a lot”. Here’s another melancholic mode instagram post below:

One of the bad side of being melancholic is that you keep thinking even when all the lights are off. I ended up sleeping past 2AM because even when the phone is turned off and my aircon is in full blast, I still keep thinking stuff about work, life, plans and even the past.

There are certain things that is so hard to understand . It ends us with the reality that certain decisions and actions from long ago can have a ripple effect all along, not to mention, consequences. And so does current decisions in life, it will impact my entire life one way or another.

But if in any consolation, the past is past and we can no longer hold dear to what has been done.

The good thing is, God in His loving nature as a Father, redeemed us from our past and reminds us that even in our darkest, He became the light and hope for us through His son.

How then should I act with my #melancholy and #liveout the best in me?

Still, in #melancholic mode and yet, hopeful that by writing what is in my head, helps me jump boat from this #temperament to my #choleric side once again.