The Arff Adventure

This is good bye

2014-06-24T19:55:00.001+02:00

It's time to say goodbye.

This blog was such a great outlet for me when I first started it so many years ago. It was meant to chronicle our new adventure to Denmark.

Now it seems like I rarely post anymore and I wanted to give it a proper send off. There are a LOT of memories inside this little blog. I could never delete it just because it holds such a giant chunk of my heart.

I have lost interest in my fitness blog as well. I'll be saying goodbye to it at some point too. But I am leaving it for now. One thing at a time!

I'm not done blogging, but this chapter "The Arff Adventure" is over. Thanks so much for reading!

Take care and God bless!

big things

2014-03-11T20:34:00.004+01:00

This is for all the times I wished that my kids were "just a little older"

...so I didn't have to lug around a stroller, diaper bag, toys and cheerios

...so I didn't have to get up in the middle of the night

...so I didn't have to change diapers and wash bottles

...so I could use the bathroom undisturbed

...so I didn't have to watch another episode of Dora

...so we didn't have to go through teething and potty training

...so that I could go out for dinner with just my husband

...

What I was doing was

bringing my best buddy everywhere with me

and listening to the cooing and jabbering from the crib.

Kissing toes and giving tickles during diaper changing time.

Getting company because my best buddy loved to be with me every where I was.

Singing our favorite songs and watching our favorite cartoons.

Laughing and playing peek-a-boo.

Taking trips as a family.

...

Being a parent is hard work. Frustrating and stressful at times.

But how quickly the time slips away.

My first born is in her last years of school.

My tiny, tiny preemie....all grown up!

Nearly 17!

I am ashamed at all the times I wished her childhood away.

All those little things

were BIG things.

I know that now.

I wished for a day when it would be just my husband and I.

But that day will be here far too soon,

I know it.

My children will grow.

There will be graduations, weddings, and grandchildren.

I am thankful to have children that will eventually have their own families.

I will love being grandma and seeing our family grow and grow

over the years.

Getting together on holidays and special occasions.

But I'm not ready for that yet.

I'm still mommy. They still think I'm the greatest woman in the world.

They still sit on my lap and listen to my stories.

They still play toys.

They still believe in Santa.

I'm going to love and hug and squeeze them until they push me away.

I will enjoy

EVERY. LITTLE. THING.

I love you, sweet babies of mine.

It's time to stand up

2014-02-08T13:48:00.000+01:00

[Start Quote]
You know what you stand for, the things you believe in; the things that matter most in your life. These bedrock beliefs are your foundation, your core; they comprise the basis for who you are today. These fundamental principles define what you do, how you think and how you act.

And they dictate what you won't stand for as well.

Standing strong in the face of adversity is anything but easy. It takes fortitude, it takes courage; it takes resolute determination and will. Sticking to your belief system is easy when things are clicking, when everything is going your way. But when things start going awry, when things start getting a little bit sticky, do you stay true to your beliefs - or do you look for the easy way out? Do you stand firm - or do you toss your beliefs aside and just go with the flow?

When you stand up for yourself and your beliefs, especially when the stakes are high, you may find yourself standing alone. And that can be daunting, overwhelming, even disheartening at times.

There are few things more unsettling than standing up for what you know is right only to have everyone else, especially those closest to you, desert you. Left on your own and all alone, you can feel abandoned, weak and highly vulnerable. You start wondering if you're doing the right thing. You start having second thoughts. And you start wavering, waffling and wilting under pressure. Yet these very moments can propel you to greatness if given half a chance.

When you stand strong, criticism will be hurled your direction. Whenever and wherever you take an unpopular stand, there will be dissenting voices in the crowd striving to shut you down or shut you up. Some may call you names. Others may question your motives and character. And there are those who may get downright down and dirty, doing whatever they can to besmirch you and your good name.

Right then and right there, amidst the most uncomfortable of uncomfortable circumstances, you are put to the ultimate test. Will you wilt in the heat of the moment and give in, tossing your principles aside or will you stand strong for what you believe is right no matter what?

Standing strong is what winning in life is all about. No, you may not always win. And yes, you will taste defeat more times than you care to remember. But make no mistake about it, when you stand up for your principles, you' re never a loser. By resolutely believing in yourself and your convictions, you develop character and an internal strength that cannot be defeated.

It's time to stand up. Believe what you believe... then live it every ounce of your soul. No more backing down, no more giving up; no more cowering in the face of difficult choices and decisions. No more squirming, no more worrying about what others may think. No more sitting on the fence, hoping you'll please those all around you. No more apologizing for what you believe.

(let's read that again, shall we? No more apologizing for what you believe.)

Don't worry about what others say or think. Just do what you know is right in your heart.

The Bottom Line: When you stand up for what you believe, you stand out.

[End Quote]

My thoughts:
This was something I read by the Power Performance Program. I'm not sure how I stumbled upon it, but somehow, I think I was directed there for a reason. I think it's a group dedicated to motivational speaking, newsletters, etc. that inspire people to be their best and succeed in life. It was rather fitting that I found it, actually. It's definitely not always pleasant to stand up for your beliefs, because not everyone shares them. But I'd rather be true to myself, than try and please everyone. We all know what a losing battle that is. When you stand for what you believe in, you are building character. When you are true to yourself and honest with those around you, that is a characteristic of true strength. Don't be afraid of those not willing to accept it - they are unsure of themselves.

If you are going to identify yourself with something, you need the backbone to take the heat when not everyone feels the same way about it as you do. Strength through adversity.

Summer....I want you back!

2014-01-27T18:58:00.002+01:00

Goofing off at the apple orchard....

I want those days again. It's WAY TOO COLD for me right now!! We have to keep the heat in our house at 60 degrees because of a pipeline explosion in Canada. I'm so looking forward to the call that tells us we can go back to our normal gas usage! I'm in long johns and sweats, 3 layers of shirts, gloves, hat and scarf and STILL cold!!

Learning to stay positive....

It's coming

2014-01-24T18:13:00.003+01:00

I've learned SO much about myself in the last year. It was the best AND worst year of my life....if you can understand that. Which, I admit, sounds weird. But out of a really bad situation came so many more wonderful things. So I believe that we live through the bad so we can discover the good.

Let me explain: Something bad happened. Then, an opportunity presented itself. It was an opportunity that could potentially make this "bad thing" a little better. And it did. But what really blossomed out of this opportunity were so many wonderful blessings that I had never anticipated. Like a flower that just keeps blooming and blooming.

And I know that even greater things have yet to come!

HI

2014-01-21T23:51:00.003+01:00

I am a Scorpio ;)

It's been the perfect day: snowy and cold outside but the fireplace is on and the stew is cooking - making the house smell glorious! I finally took the time to clean off my desktop and get rid of stuff that was cluttering it up. I love having newly freed space on my computer!!

My dog pooped today! It was a joyous occasion because she ate a bunch of tinfoil the other day and it had been about 2 days since her last ....eh, movement.

Today I'm thankful for my sweet friends. They listen with their hearts. I love you girls.

It Matters

2013-09-11T17:59:00.002+02:00

http://thechristianpundit.org/2012/08/15/it/

Click the link above to read a really interesting article. It's called "It Matters Whom You Marry". Someone posted it on Facebook and after reading it, felt the need to share it with you.

good weekend

2013-09-08T15:30:00.000+02:00

It's Sunday. I'm having a FABULOUS weekend. I haven't done anything that anyone else would consider fun (probably), but it's been great nonetheless.

A lot of people I know took their kids to the Taylor Swift concert. I had no idea she was even in town until I heard people talking about it on Friday. My kids aren't crazed fans I guess. My kids are weird that way. Never a part of the Bieberization of America. Can't stand One Direction. Used to like Miley though, until the VMAs. They are more into GaGa, Rhianna, and Maroon 5. Smart kids, I'd say ;)

It was time for the end of summer pool cleaning and sanitizing. The pool is all down and put away now. The giant circle of dead grass where it once sat looks empty and lonely. And now I have a better view of my overgrown rose garden.

I'm sore. My lower back and hamstrings. It's a tough job bailing water and scrubbing the inside of the pool! About two hours of work Hanna, Eden and I put in. Feels good to have it done.

What else did I do? Oh yeah, I did a photo restoration for a client. That went well and she was happy with the end result, which always makes me happy.

Finished putting the last of the laundry away. Laundry, from start to complete finish, always takes about a week. But I hang a lot of it up to dry instead of using the dryer. So there.

My husband went into work for a little while yesterday. He's working so much lately, poor guy. He even worked over the long holiday weekend, which is why we couldn't get away together. I wanted to go to Duluth, but not alone with the kids. I asked him who else had to work over the weekend. Nobody. I guess that is a perk of being a manager?

But he didn't work long yesterday. Then he made apple pie with our freshly picked apples from the Orchard.

We biked there. I had Emma on the tag along because I wasn't sure if she'd want to go that far on her bike. Plus my 500lb camera bag on my back. It was a good workout for sure! Andreas had the big hiking back pack on his back with our picnic stuff and it was full of apples on the way back.

This is "Big Red". Anyone seen Turbo yet? It's a good movie. Anyway, we couldn't reach this one and it was so big....and red. We were using the apples that had fallen on the ground as missiles to try and knock it down. No luck. So I got down on all fours and let my husband stand on my back. It worked!

This was the previous method. Crappy blown out picture, but you get the idea.

Eden. Always photogenic.

Trips to the orchard will always be some of my fondest memories with my family.

Mental Abuse - The 7 Most Important Things To Know

2013-08-29T21:29:00.002+02:00

1. Sticks and stones won't break my bones" - and words won't leave any measurable physical damage, but they will cause progressive, long-term harm. Never underestimate the power of words: words are used to brainwash.
Being told you are "stupid", "ugly", "lazy" or "worthless" is never acceptable. The first times you hear it, it will hurt, naturally. In time you "may get used to" hearing it from a partner. That's when you start to internalise and believe it. When that happens you are doing the other person's work of putting you down for them. This is why your feelings of self-worth suffer increasingly over time.
The good news is that just as words have been used to bring you down, you can learn to harness the power of words to build you up and restore your confidence and belief in yourself.

2. You are always told that it's your fault. Somehow, whatever happens, however it starts, the ultimate blame is always yours. Notice that we are talking ultimate blame here. The blaming partner will always tell you that their behaviour was caused by what you said or did. In fact, their argument runs along the lines that you can't possibly blame them for anything, because if you hadn't said what you said, or done what you did it would never have happened.

3. You're more inclined to believe your partner than you are to believe yourself. Have you ever reeled with a sense of hurt and injustice, or seethed with anger at the way you've been treated? Have you found yourself asking: "Is it reasonable to feel like this?" "Am I misinterpreting things?" "Have I got it wrong?"
If this is you, what it means is that you have become so brainwashed you've stopped trusting in your own judgement. Your mind keeps throwing up the observations and questions because, deep down, you know that what is happening is utterly wrong. But right now you can't feel the strength of your own convictions.

4. You need your partner to acknowledge your feelings. Have you ever felt desperate to make your partner hear what you are saying and apologise for the hurtful things they've said? Have you ever felt that only they can heal the pain they've caused?
Does your need for them to validate your feelings keep you hooked into the relationship?
When a partner constantly denies or refuses to listen to your feelings, that is, unquestionably, mental abuse.

5. Your partner blows hot and cold. He can be very loving but is often highly critical of you. He may tell you how much he loves you, yet he is short on care or consideration towards you. In fact, some of the time, maybe even a lot of the time, he treats you as if you were someone he truly dislikes.
You do everything you can to make him happy, but it's never good enough. You're more like the pet dog in the relationship than you are the equal partner. Your constant efforts to get his attention and please him meet with limited success. Sometimes he'll be charmed, often he's dismissive.
If you find yourself puzzling about how your partner can treat you that way, it is because you are trying to live in a love-based relationship, when in reality you are living in a control-based relationship. The mental abuser struggles with his own feelings of worthlessness and uses his relationship to create a feeling of personal power, at his partner's expense.

6. You feel as if you are constantly walking on eggshells. There is a real degree of fear in the relationship. You have come to dread his outbursts, the hurtful things that he will find to say to you. (Maybe the same anxiety and need to please spill over into your other relationships also.)
Fear is not part of a loving relationship, but it is a vital part of a mentally abusive relationship. It enables the abuser to maintain control over you.

7. You can heal. Mentally abusive relationships cause enormous emotional damage to the loving partner who tries, against all odds, to hold the relationship together and, ultimately, can't do it, because her partner is working against her.
Whether you are currently in a mentally abusive relationship, have left one recently, or years later are still struggling with the anxieties and low self-worth and lack of confidence caused by mental abuse, it is never too late to heal.
But you do need to work with a person or a programme specifically geared to mental abuse recovery.
Women who have suffered mental abuse expect radical change of themselves, and they expect it right away. This is why they often struggle and, not uncommonly, take up with another abusive partner.
Mental abuse recovery is a gradual process. Low self-worth and limiting beliefs about what kind of future the abuse sufferer can ever hope for are the blocks that can stop women from moving on. But they are blocks that you can clear very effectively. Just as language was once used to harm you, you can now learn how language can heal you. You can overcome past mental abuse and keep yourself safe from it in the future. You can also learn to feel strong, believe in yourself and create the life and the relationships you truly want.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/60849

Summer

2013-07-10T03:13:00.001+02:00

Hi there! Do you remember me? Probably not since I NEVER blog anymore. Just too darn busy anymore. Just thought I'd share some cute pics of my baby girl having a little fun in the sun. Hope your summer is as delightful as ours has been!

Ahhhh.......summer vacation

2013-06-06T22:42:00.003+02:00

Ahhh, summer. For the most part, there are no schedules, no routines, no plan.....it's mostly just fly by the seat of our pants. I love that my kids don't want to be in any activities over the summer months. Kids like a chance to breathe & relax too. After 9 months of hectic schedules and running everywhere, it's nice to be able to just chill. It's the perfect time to watch your stress levels fall.

We ended up at a garage sale today. It was one of those odd days where I actually had cash in my purse and Eden saw a sign and begged to go (like always), so we went. I'm not a huge garage sale person. Not that I'm above it or anything like that. I loves me a good bargain. It just makes me a little uncomfortable rummaging through other people's stuff while they watch you. I don't even like being approached by sales people when I go shopping asking me if I need help finding stuff. I always say, "No thank you" very kindly but in my head I'm screaming, "NO! GET AWAY FROM ME!". So anyway, we left with a lot of "name brand" clothing for dirt cheap. Some good finds.

We had to laugh though because there was a lady there who was complaining about the price of the paperback books they were selling. She said that selling them for $1 a piece was way too high priced and most people wouldn't sell them for over 50 cents. And she went on and on about it. Took a 5 or 10 minute break. Then started up again about the outrageousness of trying to sell a paperback book for $1, as if she hadn't just gave the very same speech 5 minutes ago. Funny.

On a crazy whim, we went to Taco Johns for lunch. I had two hard shell tacos and a small sized order of potato oles. I decided to look at the calorie content on my phone as I waited for my kids to finish eating. First, I saw the tacos. Compared to everything else on the list, if you are going to get anything, get the hard shell tacos. Pretty much the lowest calorie item. Yay for me! And I wasn't even trying. Then I looked at the oles - 400 calories....in a small!!! Holy crap! There went all the good I did ordering the low calorie tacos! And right then and there I vowed to not eat anymore of that kind of stuff until it was time to celebrate losing the 10 pounds I've gained. Sounds vaguely familiar to the vow I said Tuesday night, after my anniversary pasta dinner gorge-and-barf-o-rama.

Did you know that a chicken fajita at Taco Johns is like 850 calories?! I would have guessed that if anything, that would be one of the better choices. Yikes! Not so! Eating out is just plain terrible for you. And don't get me started on the sodium content of restaurant food! You are so much better off preparing your meals at home.

I've been doing slightly better this week. Things are...ok. Better than terrible, so I'll take it. I still feel as though I'm just going through the motions from day to day. Simply trying to get by. I'm hoping that the sun will start to shine in this perpetually gloomy part of the country because that always helps things seem a little less hopeless. But I have a feeling this is going to be one painfully short summer. If I had the chance to move south (or anywhere warm for that matter), I wouldn't hesitate. Not even a little.

My Odd Duck

2013-05-27T14:52:00.001+02:00

My kids are always telling me I smell good. Of course they say that about their grandmas too. In fact, sometimes Eden will come home from school and the first thing she says when she walks through the door is, "I smell grandma!" and indeed grandma had been over that day. And one time she was talking to Gram on the phone and said, "I can even smell you through the phone". It's kind of cute.

But now Eden has gotten into huffing me. She is ALWAYS by me.....sniffing. It's almost embarrassing anymore! We were bowling a few nights ago and she wouldn't stop sniffing me so I finally had to raise my voice and tell her to knock it off! Then she got all pouty about it. I felt bad, but come on, really? In public now?

So this morning, she was laying on the floor beside me at my computer (where Lizzy usually lays) and after about 10 minutes she finally said, "Mom, can I just have ONE sniff??" Oh dear Lord!

So I let her have one.

This kid is an odd duck. She's super freakishly smart. In the highest math group in her class. I don't think she's missed a single spelling word on a spelling test in the last 2 years. She rarely ever needs help with homework and when she does, it's a math problem that even I don't know how to do. Which is sort of embarrassing to say but everyone who knows me knows that math and I don't get along. Except for trig. For some strange reason, I aced my college trigonometry class. Who knew! That was back in a time when I was going to be an architect. HA! Can you imagine?!

Anyway, continuing on with my odd duck, she doesn't like elevators, she's got an above average level of OCD, and she thinks our dog's paws smell like "fresh Chinese rice". But she's my odd duck, and I love her.

Flashback Tuesday

2013-03-26T21:21:00.003+01:00

It doesn't quite have that ring to it like Flashback Friday, does it?

So I was reading some of my blog posts from long ago and thinking since I rarely post anymore, it might be fun to relive some fun moments from a few years ago. So here you go!

http://thearffadventure.blogspot.com/2008/10/emmas-haircut.html

A poem

2012-12-20T19:35:00.002+01:00

This poem was forwarded to me by my sister-in-law and I thought it was so beautiful, I had to share it.

Twas' 11 days before Christmas, around 9:38
>
> when 20 beautiful children stormed through heaven's gate.
>
> their smiles were contagious, their laughter filled the air
>
> they could hardly believe all the beauty they saw there
>
> They were filled with such joy, they didn't know what to say
>
> they remembered nothing of what had happened earlier that day.
>
> "where are we?" asked a little girl, as quiet as a mouse
>
> "this is heaven." declared a small boy. "we're spending Christmas at God's house."
>
> When what to their wondering eyes did appear,
>
> but Jesus, their savior, the children gathered near.
>
> He looked at them and smiled, and they smiled just the same
>
> then He opened His arms and He called them by name.
>
> and in that moment was joy, that only heaven can bring
>
> those children all flew into the arms of their King
>
> and as they lingered in the warmth of His embrace,
>
> one small girl turned and looked at Jesus' face.
>
> And as if He could read all the questions she had
>
> He gently whispered to her, "I'll take care of mom and dad."
>
> then He looked down on earth, the world far below
>
> He saw all of the hurt, the sorrow, and woe
>
> then He closed His eyes and He outstretched His hand,
>
> "Let My power and presence re-enter this land!"
>
> "may this country be delivered from the hands of fools"
>
> "I'm taking back my nation. I'm taking back my schools!"
>
> Then He and the children stood up without a sound
>
> "come now my children, let me show you around."
>
> Excitement filled the space, some skipped and some ran.
>
> all displaying enthusiasm that only a small child can.
>
> And I heard Him proclaim as He walked out of sight,
>
> "in the midst of this darkness, I am still The Light."
>
> ~Author unknown

It reminds me to trust that even though they were so tragically taken from this earth, the beauty and love they see and feel right now is beyond our comprehension.

And on another note, we are in the midst of a great controversy right now. The gun debate; some want stricter laws while others believe that isn't the solution. I don't own a gun. I never will. It's just too scary to think about, having a gun in my house. But I don't believe that banning guns is the answer. Criminals do not obey laws. They will obtain guns either way. People who want to do harm will always find a way.

We need to stop the arguing over who's right or wrong. We need to come together. I know we all feel that something has to be done. Just what that something is, is the big question. But one thing we can ALL do, is to stop focusing on all the evil that is in this world, and do our part to show the kind and loving side of human nature. Go out of your way this holiday season {and always} to show kindness to family and strangers alike. Ever see that commercial where someone witnesses a random act of kindness and it sets a chain reaction of good deeds into effect? THAT'S what we need to do! Inspire the world to do good! Show evil that good WILL prevail. We won't cower in fear or wave the white flag. We will stand up and fight for good. Show extra compassion. Give extra tight hugs. Light up this world with a love that can be seen from the heavens. Let's show those little angels we can do better.

Psalm 27:13-14 "I believe that I shall see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!"

address

2012-12-18T21:07:00.000+01:00

I found the address to send condolences to the families of the Sandy Hook tragedy. I wish I could do something more for them, but the more love and prayers they receive, the tighter they will feel God's arms wrapped around them. Here it is:

PO Box 3700
Newtown, CT 06470

heaviness

2012-12-17T15:29:00.000+01:00

This is Emma. She is 6 years old.

She is the same age as the majority of the children

tragically killed last Friday in CT.

Look at her face. That sweet innocence only a child

can possess. She is love. Pure love.

As I look at the faces of the sweet children that were taken from their parents

far too soon, I can't help but picture my own child's face. That could have been her!

That could have been her classmates!

My heart is so heavy with sadness. I find myself constantly shaking my head in disbelief

and can't fight back the tears. Those families. Those poor devastated families.

Christmas is supposed to be a time of rejoicing. They will only feel loss.

Sorrow. The emptiness of a loved one....forever gone.

A child.

How will they cope? The hole in their hearts must be unbearable.

Please, God....please comfort them. Please tell their parents

that they are with you. That they didn't suffer. That angels were there with them,

holding them close. That they are in paradise where there is no more

evil. Tell them somehow. Help them. Please, God. Help them understand

that even though they held those precious children only a short time,

they will be reunited some day. Help them get through this life

on earth without them. Please, God.

Help the rest of us deal with the fear. Help us heal our own hearts and trust that

you have a plan for everyone. And one day, this heartbreak will end.

Help those suffering from mental illness get the attention and care they need.

Help everyone suffering with the sadness that surrounds us today and always.

Pray

2012-12-16T16:05:00.006+01:00

"The angels are always near to those who are grieving, to whisper to them that their loved ones are safe in the hand of God." ~ Quoted in The Angels' Little Instruction Book by Eileen Elias Freeman, 1994

Please pray for the families of the following angels:

CHILDREN
Charlotte Bacon, (age 6)
Daniel Barden, (age 7)
Olivia Engel, (age 6)
Josephine Gay, (age 7)
Ana M. Marquez-Greene, (age 6)
Dylan Hockley, (age 6)
Madeleine F. Hsu, (age 6)
Catherine V. Hubbard, (age 6)
Chase Kowalski, (age 7)
Jesse Lewis, (age 6)
James Mattioli, (age 6)
Grace McDonnell, (age 7)
Emilie Parker, (age 6)
Jack Pinto, (age 6)
Noah Pozner, (age 6)
Caroline Previdi, (age 6)
Jessica Rekos, (age 6)
Avielle Richman, (age 6)
Benjamin Wheeler, (age 6)
Allison N. Wyatt, (age 6)

ADULTS
Rachel Davino, (age 29)
Dawn Hochsprung, (age 47)
Anne Marie Murphy, (age 52)
Lauren Russeau, (age 29)
Mary Sherlach, (age 56)
Victoria Soto, (age 27)

Tragedy

2012-12-15T14:02:00.002+01:00

I didn't sleep well last night. I couldn't stop thinking of the tragedy that has befallen the quaint town of Newtown CT. It was supposed to be a safe town, one that has only had 1 homicide in the past 10 years. This really opens one's eyes to the fact that it truly is safe nowhere. We let our guard down, thinking something like this could never happen to us or our community, but we just never know. And that is the scariest thing. Like was said in one article, "Not even kindergartners learning their ABCs are safe." It's horrifying.

I am someone who would be devastated to accidentally hit a squirrel with my car on a road, so I cannot even fathom what state of mind this boy was in to be able to carry out such a heinous and despicable act. Practically a kid himself, he coldly and maliciously cut the lives of so many innocent children short. It was said he struggled with mental illness. Well, you'd almost certainly have to have some wires crossed to do something like shoot kindergartners. That, and be 100% pure evil. I'm sorry, mental illness is no excuse. He still knew right from wrong.

Last night, as I lay in my bed trying to fall asleep, all I could think about was how devastated those families are. How they woke up this morning and got their children ready for school like any other day, for the last time. They will never do it again. They will never kiss them goodnight, help them with their homework, watch them grow.....it breaks my heart. It breaks everyone's heart. To lose a child is unimaginable.

So I prayed. And I prayed. And I prayed. And as I prayed I thought, what can we do? I mean, we can all pray for the families, but it won't ease their sorrow. Nothing can. Nothing short of God bringing these innocent people back to life can. Why does this happen? Life is so unfair! It makes me question so much. One thing in particular is gun control.

This is a heated topic. So many people believe that it's their right to own a gun to protect themselves. But I believe that it's probably more common that these guns kill more innocent people in accidents and horrific acts like yesterday, than they do protecting people from intruders. I also believe that if we had really strict guns laws which made it near impossible for the average person to own a gun, things like this would probably happen anyway. When evil people want to hurt others, they will always find a way.

Obviously this boy wanted to die. But why.....why, why, WHY did he have to take 27 other lives first?? Why children? 5 through 10 year olds.....why? That question is on everyone's mind today. And even if we did have an answer to that, it wouldn't make it any better. Our hearts would still break for those affected. There are still 20 young children who will never experience college, marriage, children, grandchildren, etc. And 7 adults, who won't be going home to their families. Their loved ones left with the void of someone dear to them, forever gone. They just didn't deserve to die. It's so incredibly sad.

And then there are the kids that survived. They are lucky to be alive but they are forever scarred with the horror of what happened. It couldn't have been an easy thing to witness as a child. God help them heal.

When my kids got home from school yesterday, I hugged them for a really long time. Eden said, "Are you OK, mom?" And I thought, as I hugged her, feeling her breathe, smelling her hair, feeling her warmth, how lucky I am that I can still hold them. Still snuggle them. Hear them laugh. It's a blessing. A gift for which I which I will never take for granted again. You just never know how long you have with the people you love. And no matter how long, it's never enough.

My deepest sympathy to the families affected by this tragedy. Heartfelt thoughts and prayers to everyone involved. May you find the strength to get through these difficult times ahead.

skating

2012-12-13T17:04:00.002+01:00

We bought each of the girls a pair of brand new ice skates about a month or so ago. The first time they used them was about two weeks ago. These are a couple of pictures from that day. See how behind I am with looking through photos lately??

This was Emma's first time skating ever. She loved it. I remember Hanna's first time skating. She was taking lessons, and she must have been in preschool. I wanted to start her early because it was my hope that she would be a hockey player. Anyway, she couldn't stand up on the ice by herself so they let her have a chair for balance. It was the cutest thing. The whole group would be listening to the instructor and Hanna would be off in her own little world, pushing her chair around the rink.

Maybe I'll have a hockey player yet :)

Cute Barbie Cupcakes

2012-10-18T20:14:00.002+02:00

I know this isn't in English, but the video is very self explanitory. This seems like a really easy way to make Barbie cupcakes that any little girl would love :)

Happy Fall

2012-09-13T18:54:00.000+02:00

I don't really know when the beginning of fall actually is, but it has to be soon. The air is so chilly in the morning now.

Anyway, I've been busy creating cards for Prints Charming. I am so darn excited to launch my website!! But I wanted to give you a little preview of what I've been up to!

Let me know what you think!

This one is a flat 5x5 card and I am showing both front and back sides here.

I am planning to offer customizable clipping mask templates for photoshop as well as pre made cards through my website (eventually). It takes some time to create each card but it is SO MUCH FUN!

time to drain the pool

2012-09-10T15:34:00.000+02:00

Considering how cold it's been at night, I think that draining the pool is a few weeks overdue. The only reason that we waited is because Eden wanted to use it for her birthday party. Well, we ended up rescheduling her party so in the end, it was pointless to keep it up.

Draining it is pretty effortless. You attach a garden hose to the plug at the bottom and let 'er rip. Except for one...minor problem. The plug needs to be removed from the inside.

DOH!

Well I certainly wasn't going to do it. Andreas wasn't going to do it. Eden and Emma are too little to do it. That leaves one person....

Oh come on, it seems logical enough to me. She's on the Davies swim team, she can do all the fancy turn flipping underneath the water, certainly she can handle a backyard pool plug! Needless to say, getting in that frigid pool water did not excite her. One. Bit.

Don't worry, we rewarded her handsomely. A $5 bill should cut it, right?

When we told her about the prospect of making a couple of easy bucks we thought she'd be ALL over it (considering she's saving up for some beats). But then she informed us that NO amount of money was going to make her get in that water.

Then we made her do it anyway.

MuuuuUUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!

But all is well. We let her take her time getting in the water instead of rushing her through it. After close to 45 minutes of whining and procrastinating on the pool ladder, she plunged underneath the water and pulled the plug. Literally a 10 second job. I could handle a $5/ 10 second job. Anyone hiring?

Cameras and their operators

2012-08-29T15:42:00.000+02:00

I saw this on Facebook this morning and had to share it.

It's so true. I think a lot of photographers get annoyed when people say things like, "Your camera takes such good pictures". While it is true that expensive cameras and lenses have their place, it's the one who's operating that expensive equipment that makes a picture good or bad. Yes, expensive cameras can take bad pictures.

In fact, you don't even need expensive top of the line cameras and lenses to take incredible photos. Some of my most favorite captures (still) are those I had taken on a fairly inexpensive point and shoot Canon.

Composition matters. If you don't have an artful eye, it doesn't matter how many thousands of dollars you spend on photographic equipment, you won't take great pictures.

"The single most important component
of a camera is the twelve inches behind it." - Ansel Adams

"Buying new gear will NOT improve your photography. For decades I thought "if I only had that new lens" that all my photo wants would be satisfied. Nope. I still want that "one more lens," and I've been shooting for over 30 years. There is always one more lens. Get over it." - Ken Rockwell

In fact, here's the link to page on Ken's site on which I found this quote. He's awesome.

http://www.kenrockwell.com/tech/notcamera.htm

Please remember this, when complimenting a photo, make sure it's directed at the one who truly deserves it - the person behind the camera ;)

Cow lick

2012-08-22T18:15:00.000+02:00

This was in the petting zoo at Bonanzaville's Pioneer Days

It was a fun day. Perfect beautiful weather, not too hot. My favorite part was petting this cute little calf. It was munching on our fingers and had a rough scratchy tongue. I could have stayed there all day petting him. He was so cute.

I have taken SO many pictures over the past month or two and I haven't gotten a chance to edit any. Who wants to sit inside and edit photos when you can be outside in the summer sun??

I did edit this one though.

I really love this picture of Eden. It was one of those unexpected favorites. They were making tents on the deck out of blankets and sheets and there just happened to be a piece of sparkly fabric draped over a chair in the background making this really lovely bokeh. This was a very crisp photo, her eyes were so clear. But I chose to make it hazy and soft anyway. Sharp eyes are something I really love about a good photo, but I also love these softer looking pictures. So pretty.

I have tried, honestly I have, to sit down a little each day and do some work with my images but it's almost impossible to get anything done with kids around. The second I sit on the computer chair, they are in the room. Like a magnet, they cling to me. Talking, talking, talking, always talking. Asking me questions, showing me this or that. Inside, I'm just screaming but I have to try and be patient with them. I know they love being with me. But how can anyone with kids at home actually do work that requires brain power?? It's like trying to read a book with kids around. Pointless. You are constantly interrupted. And you realize you've read the same sentence 4 times and still don't have a clue what you've just read. At that point, it's time to give up.

So here's to the last day of endless talking and interruption. I'm going to spend it outside, enjoying the company of my fabulous, sweet, adorable girls. Just being with them, no schedule, no cares, no worries. Just us. Soon enough, I'll wish I had these carefree days back.

Unleashing the beast

2012-08-17T17:20:00.000+02:00

When it rains, it pours. That's what my mom's words of wisdom were for me this morning as I whined to her about my growing problems at home. Not marital problems, no worries there. House problems.

I love our house. I remember the excitement I felt the first time we looked at it. As we walked through the front door, I instantly felt home. I imagined my girls running down the beautiful open staircase in their jammies and slippers on Christmas morning, big family Thanksgiving dinners, and birthday parties. I loved it. And I still do, but.....

It's been quite the money pit. I won't go into detail (as I'm sure my husband wouldn't appreciate it), but let's just say, we've put way more money into repairs than we would have liked in the short 3 years we've been here. We expect a certain amount of repairs to be done on an older house, but when we have to repair the same thing more than once, twice, even THREE times, it's more than a tad frustrating.

Case and point - our central air. It stopped running on a Sunday. On Monday, I called a local heating and cooling business (I won't mention any names) and got prompt same day service. The technician changed our embarrassingly dirty filter, changed some batteries, trimmed the bush that was overtaking the outdoor portion of the cooling unit and it appeared to be working. Yay! Two days later, it stopped working. So I called again. And again I got prompt same day service. They sent the same technician out. Turns out we needed a new control board. So, we got charged a second hefty service call fee and another big chunk for the new control board. We were frustrated to say the least. We felt it was unfair to be charged for a second call for the same problem that should have been taken care of on the first visit. In fact, I was just about to write a letter to the company about it when.......our air stopped working. AGAIN!

Well, you can imagine how extremely unimpressed we were with the situation at this point. And of course since I'm the one that's home during the day, I get to deal with all the phone calls. I was not looking forward to calling this place a THIRD time for the same problem. I was literally shaking as I was dialing the number. I was so mad and so scared at the same time. I knew that I wouldn't be able to hide my frustration with the situation and the tech that seemed to not be able to deliver anything except more bills. Cha-ching!

So I was straight forward with them and told them that I wasn't trying to be a jerk but I want this fixed NOW and I'm not paying another stinking service call fee at $95 a crack! "...and if you can't do it, I'll take my business to someone who CAN!..." Luckily they were very understanding and wanted to make the situation right. They sent out a tech with more experience ('bout time) and got the problem fixed. Well, so far it's still fixed, knock on wood. Turns out, there was some sort of clogged tube (which explained all the water we now had all over our basement floor - making a musty stench that I'm not sure we'll ever get rid of) and the water was dripping all over the new control board AND the fan wasn't working. So we got a new control board (again) but under warranty (thank the Lord) and new fan and we didn't get charged another fee. In fact, they were going to see about refunding one of the service call fees and any other charges that seemed unnecessary because of a misdiagnosis by the first tech. Also, we might even get a discount on the expensive new fan we had to have installed on the third visit because of all of the troubles we'd been having.

It's been a frustrating few weeks.

To top it all off, yesterday, as I was working on the website for Prints Charming, the computer made a loud ZAP noise and wouldn't turn on. The stench of some electrical fry job was in the air. Of course I'm freaking out because my LIFE is on that computer. And as you may or may not know, our internet has been in and out (mostly out) over the course of many weeks, and when my husband finally ordered a new router, it turned out that we needed a new modem as well. DOH! So he ordered a new modem and it wasn't on the "approved" list as per our internet provider. So we had to send it back and get a different one, which hasn't arrived yet. Honestly....I'm thinking that the universe is trying to tell me something. Anyway, ever since the computer got fried, the internet won't go on even for a second and I'm wondering if it has something to do with the fact that while our air was spazing out and dumping water all over our basement floor (exactly where our router, modem and whatever else is down there buried under 50lbs of cables) it shorted something or ruined something down there. Let's hope it's not the brand new router.

Sigh....

So, you see, when my mom said "when it rains, it pours" she was speaking some wise words. I'm typing this from my mom's computer. I am literally just wandering the house, not knowing what to do with myself now that I have no computer or internet access (other than my cell phone). I can't work on my photos, or my website, or my blog....and I'm going insane! What did I do before there was internet???!!!

I apologize for the pity party, but I wanted to explain why I'm not posting very much lately. Hopefully we will be back online with a working computer and reliable internet connection once again very soon. And also, that our air will continue to work for more than two days (fingers crossed).