The Bachelor Guy

Top 5 Reveals At E3 09

Thu, 4 Jun 2009 20:54:31 -0700

The rest of 2009 is looking to be a good year for gamers. Here are the top 5 reveals from Nintendo's, Microsoft's, and Sony's press conferences over the past couple days.

5.� PSP Go

A more compact, improved, PSP with a slider screen? Sign me up, although the $249 price tag does sting for a system that�s several years old with an iffy library of games.

4. Natal

Taking the interactivity of Nintendo�s Wii and subtracting the need for any controllers to wave around, Microsoft�s Natal is set on revolutionizing the gaming experience. We�ll see how the developers and consumers support this device in the future.

3. Metal Gear Comes To Xbox 360

Another huge coup for Microsoft (after last year�s announcement of Final Fantasy XIII), Hideo Kojima revealed that the next Metal Gear game, Metal Gear: Rising, will be coming to the Xbox 360. Of course, it�s also coming to the PC and PS3 but that�s not important.

2. Metroid: Other M
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When I did own a Wii, Metroid was by far the most solid title in the Wii library. This time, Team Ninja (makers of the Ninja Gaiden series) have taken the helm for Metroid�s new adventure.

1. Modern Warfare 2

Finally, gameplay footage of Infinity Ward�s sequel to 2007�s masterpiece, Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare. Nothing quite like driving a snowmobile in Russia with the throttle in your right hand and a Skorpion in your left. Modern Warfare 2 drops November 10th for the Xbox 360 and PS3.

Your Daily Link Drop - June 5, 2009

Thu, 4 Jun 2009 20:25:29 -0700

Bar Refaeli has a birthday, we get pics : MoonDog Sports

Ridiculously expensive Star Wars Lego sets : Gunaxin

Randy Orton almost beats Mexican reporter : Total Pro Sports

20 hilarious Yahoo! Answers questions : NextRound

Kate Winslet on her pubic hair wig : The Frisky

5 terrifying robot animals : Atom.com

Cuban gynecologist-turned-car-salesman : All Left Turns

You Don't Know Jack is back : LinkDork

It's time for Dear Illuminati : 9 to Fried

RIP David Carradine : Asylum

5 best Zach Galifianakis moments : Dave and Thomas

An ant on a turntable : I Heart Chaos

Anetta Keys wants to ride your hog : The Beer Goggler

7 YouTube videos that could be considered child abuse : Blog of Hilarity

Albino animals on the web : URLesque

The controversial Playboy Hate F*ck list : Don Chavez

Is Dwight Howard really the next Superman? : TastyBooze

Amy Sedaris teaches Chelsea Handler how to clean her vagina : Whip It Out Comedy

7 cats on Twitter with more followers than you : Hey Look Animals

Worst jail break ever : Big Stupid Idiot

Forbes� Top(less) Celebrity 100 Power List : CoEd Mag

Thigh of the Week: Carolina Ardohain : Sharapova's Thigh

The birth of the "Fat Free Revolution" : IceIce Babies

That's some concentration : Wii Hotties

10 ways the rest of the world has it better in sports : On 205th

Adam Morrison Random Thoughts - NBA Finals Edition

Thu, 4 Jun 2009 12:03:38 -0700

�Boy, I hope bench seat No. 4 is available � that gives me the best view of the Laker Girls and Dyan Cannon!�

�When the players come off the floor, should I go with the fist bump or the traditional high five? Shit, here they come...�

�Hopefully J.J. Redick and I can sync up our Nintendo DS systems and play NBA Live �09 during the game.�

�Please don't let Sasha Vujacic to sit next to me � he smells like stale broccoli.�

�Kobe Bryant called me �Alan� the other day � He�s getting closer. I must be making an impact!�

�Since I don�t have to worry about Coach Jackson looking my way, I should be able to get some solid Twittering in tonight.�

�I�ve seen Orlando play quite a bit during my bench days in Charlotte � the Magic are pretty good. You know what else was good? That Charlotte bench. Nice and cozy.�

�Those warm-ups get pretty itchy when you never take them off. Next time I'll just wear my street clothes for maximum comfort.�

�Well, at least I don�t have to worry about bawling my eyes out this time. Everyone says we're going to win in six.�

5 Summer Beer Tips From an American Patriot

Wed, 3 Jun 2009 22:54:27 -0700

Slap on that Speedo and smear on that sunscreen. OK, scratch the Speedo. You can�t pull it off anyway. What I�m trying to say is that summer is almost here and we're running out of time to prepare. And when it comes to beer, there is definitely a right way and a wrong way to sip your suds.

After all, why spend all that money on good beer if you aren�t going to make sure that it�s in peak physical condition when it hits your lips?

Jim Koch, founder and head hops honcho at the Boston Beer Company � makers of all things Sam Adams � has a few tips that are sure to get you headed in the right direction:

1 - If you�re going to hit the beach, go for a beer packaged in brown bottles. (As opposed to green or clear.) Too much light (especially direct sunlight) can skunk beer. Brown bottles keep out sunlight better than green or clear, protecting your beer from those harmful rays. Which is why Koch will only use brown for Samuel Adams.

2 - Store beer upright in your cooler or on the door of refrigerator, never on its side. Storing beer on its side can expose more of the beer to oxygen and sunlight, causing it to go bad more quickly.

3 - Don�t be afraid to re-chill your beer. The cold-to-warm-to-cold again temperature thing is a myth. The colder you keep your beer (35 to 40 degrees F is good), the longer it will stay fresh. If your beer gets to room temperature, chill it again. However, if you�re beer gets too hot, say for example you�ve left it in a hot car all day, it will hasten its deterioration, causing the beer to oxidize giving it a �cardboard� taste.

4 - Always store your beer inside a cooler with a lid versus an ice bucket. The cooler will not only keep you beer colder longer, but will also protect it from sunlight, which again, is a major cause of skunking.

5 - The best way to properly enjoy your beer is poured in a room temperature glass, NEVER a chilled or frosty mug. A chilled mug can dilute the aroma and flavor of your beer if it�s too cold, or if it has picked up odors from the fridge.

That about covers the brew basics. If you follow these few simple rules (including the Speedo one) you are sure to have the best beer experience possible.

And so you don�t leave feeling as if I haven�t dropped the prerequisite pearl of wisdom, pontificate on this point: Beer is like a woman... if you take care of it and treat it with the respect it deserves, it won�t leave a bad taste in your mouth and you won�t have to throw it out before you�ve had your fill. Bottoms up!

Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker Announced

Wed, 3 Jun 2009 22:33:04 -0700

At E3 yesterday, Hideo Kojima showed up to announce a new Metal Gear Solid game, this time for the PSP. Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker follows Big Boss about ten years after the events of Metal Gear 3: Snake Eater, during the mercenary operation that gives rise to Outer Heaven in Costa Rica.

It appears to have a play style more in line with previous titles in the series than Metal Gear - requiring more sneaky, neck-breaking action than Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots, in which you could choose to shoot everybody in the face if you weren�t into the whole stealth thing.

The game, written and produced by Kojima, also appears to feature multiple Snakes, four of them together on the same team, which is a little confusing. I mean, yeah, it�s hot � just imagine the four of them, doing naughty things to a bunch of terrorists... I just mean that since they look the same, it might be confusing as to which one is talking, since they�ll all probably have the same gravelly voice; or which one is the player�s character; and how did there get to be four of them?

Anyway, the game is set for 2010, giving you plenty of time to brush up on the deep, confusing, but satisfying, Metal Gear back-story, and work out your complicated feelings for Snake.

Check out the trailer here.

Gimmee an F

Wed, 3 Jun 2009 22:19:34 -0700

As a teenager, I dreamt of infiltrating three things:
1 - A closed Hastings record store in the Mesilla Valley Mall, and I'd head straight for the early 90's Keith Sweat bootlegs...

2 - Val Verde, alongside Arnold Schwartzenegger, so we could together rescue Alyssa Milano from the wicked El Presidente, and she would finally understand how much she needs me...

3 - A cheerleading camp, the place where pubescent boy dreams go to thrive and flourish forever...

The movie "Fired Up", is that very castle in the sky. Two guys infiltrate a cheerleading camp, find themselves, find love, find life. And boobs. Lots and lots of boobs.

It'll be available, unrated, on DVD or Blu-ray, June 9th. Which is totally fantastic because it's
definitely a movie best enjoyed in the privacy of your home - as opposed to a packed theater-plex, where numerous people are prone to point and laugh at the trouser teepee you're sporting as you leave. Uh Ungowa indeed.

www.sonypictures.com

Your Daily Link Drop - June 4, 2009

Wed, 3 Jun 2009 21:45:47 -0700

Meet Mercedes Terrell, ModFX Model : MoonDog Sports

10 sexiest women on Capital Hill : Veto Corleone

Shilla Darams is your new fav WAG : Don Chavez

10 greatest Conan characters : Manofest

Chad Leonhardt lands viscous knee KO : Total Pro Sports

New Sarah Palin porno in the works : The Frisky

"Survivorman" vs "Man vs Wild." Who ya got? : Straight Pinkies

Pauly Shore's career in 3 jokes : Screen Junkies

Nasty NASCAR wrecks at Pocono : All Left Turns

Hot chicks in prank videos : Uncoached

Things from your childhood that don't need a movie : YepYep

10 worst things you can say the morning after : College Candy

Quit your job, work for Orlando : 9 to Fried

Lily Allen is having a little trouble with her dress : The Beer Goggler

The commentator of our generation : Blog of Hilarity

Mr. Potato Head kicks : Afrojacks

NBA Drinking Game : NextRound

The most powerful nerd in the world : TastyBooze

10 greatest standup comedy bits about sex : Whip It Out Comedy

George Brett has become a pissed off grumpy old man : Jock and Balls

7 greatest WTF 'Fox & Friends' moments : TV Munchies

Top 10 stupid store names : Banned In Hollywood

Video game trailer for UNCHARTED 2: Among Thieves : Foundry Music

Hardcore. Claymation. Tetris. Porn. It's all here : Atom.com

Nebraska's Tara Mueller beach volleyball bikini action : Busted Coverage

French Open bloopers : Fandome

How to get the best tix from TicketMaster : OhConcierge

LaRussa sues Twitter : Fanhouse

Bruno sued by paralyzed old lady : FilmDrunk

What's the deadliest weapon you can hide up your ass? : Spike

The babes of G4 cover E3 : Gunaxin

Jacqueline Rodriguez in Maxim : On 205th

Redemption for the Afro Ninja

Wed, 3 Jun 2009 13:03:51 -0700

Remember the Afro Ninja? The guy who knocked himself stupid doing a backflip while auditioning for a commercial? Then gamely tried to continue on, dizzily swinging his chucks, only to end up looking like Napoleon Dynamite after too much Boone's Farm?

Sure you do. We all do. 6.9 million of us saw the clip. Most of us multiple times.

So what's the Afro Ninja up to now? Comedian Daniel Tosh went to find out for his new show Tosh.0, premiering on Comedy Central tomorrow night at 10pm.

Turns out ol' A-N is an award winning stuntman - who actually got the gig after that brain-cell-damaging audition. (Jeez, what'd the other guys do, shit their pants and burn the studio down?)

Tosh gives Afro Ninja a shot at redemption... by attempting the backflip once again. Does he finally land it? Check the clip below.

Tosh.0

Thurs June 4th, 10pm / 9c

Preview - Afro Ninja: Redemption

Viral Video Report: Well Played, BooneOakley

Wed, 3 Jun 2009 10:48:21 -0700

For those of us that have been in the job market and researched a company prior to an interview, we all know that most company websites suck.

But not BooneOakley's. This award-winning ad agency put their entire "website" online in the form of a YouTube video. (Even typing in BooneOakley.com will just redirect you right to the "main page" video on YouTube.)

Not many companies will let you watch a failed, egg-shaped marketing director get murdered by his wife. Life lesson right there. Get married, stop bringing home the bacon, and you'll get whacked by a hitman.

Cartoon Hockey Chicks Brawling - This is How You Make the NHL Playoffs More Exciting

Wed, 3 Jun 2009 10:25:04 -0700

Artist extraordinaire, and rabid hockey fan, Robert Ullman has been spicing up the NHL postseason this year by utilizing his talents to predict the playoff winners.

Of course it helps that his talent is creating ridiculously hot women beating each other up while wearing nothing but hockey sweaters.

Ullman, who does illustrations for a variety of publications, as well as for his own blog (/rkullman.blogspot.com/), is a die-hard Pittsburgh Penguins fan, so it�s no surprise as to whom he thinks will win the Stanley Cup. (Although things don�t look so good right now.)

A collection of some of his best work is coming out in July: Atom Bomb Bikini: The Lurid Art of Robert Ullman. It's 64 full-color pages of his best stuff, and it'll will be available for pre-orders on his site soon.

In addition, Robert does commission work (check out the gallery below for some samples of his favorites), so if you ever wanted to see your significant other (or simply a hot cartoon girl) sporting the very small uniform of your favorite team, you�ve just found your man.

You can check out more samples of his work (here).