The Beautiful Kind

Calling All St. Louis Swingers: Come to the Queen of Hearts Ball Feb 25!

2012-02-22T06:00:00-06:00

Support Sex Positive St. Louis and attend their swanky Queen of Hearts Ball Feb 25! Meet Cooper and Marilyn Beckett of Life on the Swingset!

Queen of Hearts Ball Feb 25!

I'll go ahead and say it - I don't get the local swinger community.

I'd like swanky, classy places to socialize with other swingers, not seedy bars and creepy hotels.

So I thought it would be nice to create the kind of event I'D like to see available in St. Louis.

We also thought it would be nice to have a fundraiser for Sex Positive St. Louis, since we're an all-volunteer organization and offer so many free things to the community - resources, events, advice - if it's sexy, we've given it away for free.

Enter the Queen of Hearts Ball.

We went out of our way to make this fundraiser extra special, including having it at one of the nicest bars in town (LOLA!), and inviting a nationally known couple in the sex-positive community as our guests of honor.

I'm very excited for you to meet Cooper and Marilyn Beckett of Life on the Swingset! They're coming in from out of town just for this party.

About their website:

My wife Marilyn and I started “Life on the Swingset” as a primer to the lifestyle for those just starting their exploration, those who are simply considering the idea, and those already on board this crazy ride on the swingset. We’ve assembled a wonderful collection of open minded and friendly people to contribute blogs, sex toy reviews, and podcasts, and to discuss a very unique Lifestyle with gusto and enthusiasm.

Swingers, polyamorists, triads, BDSM folk, other open people, there’s something here for everybody who subscribes to the notion that sexual exploration and openness is healthy, friendly, and most importantly FUN.

One of my favorite interviews on their website is this one with Terry Gould, the author of The Lifestyle: A Look at the Erotic Rites of Swingers.

I interviewed Cooper over on Sex Positive St. Louis, but I also asked him a few questions to share here.

I met Cooper and Marilyn last summer, and of course we had sex. Or at least, in my opinion we did. They had SO MANY TOYS! And Marilyn squirted so much! And Cooper ate my pussy! And I sucked his dick! And there were naked bodies everywhere!

OK, on to the questions...

Kendra: I'm writing an article about Penis-in-Vagina sex for my website and wanted to ask you questions as a swinger: Did we have sex when we met up this summer? Were you happy with what we did? Did you feel like the experience was incomplete because we didn't have penis-in-vagina intercourse?

Cooper: Yes I would say we had sex. Oral sex counts as sex in my book. Though it's one of those labels then that were you explaining to someone else, you may quantify. I was very happy with what we did, enjoyed you thoroughly. I did not feel the experience was incomplete, it just gives me something new to look forward to the next time I see you!

Kendra: My friend had a date with a swinger couple the other night and she told them she was down for playing, but that Penis-in-Vagina was off-limits that night. The couple was disappointed to hear that, and the man commented, "But then it won't count." What did he mean by that?

Life on the Swingset logo

Cooper: Well, first of all, even if this guy's thinking such an odd thing, he ought not to have said it. I think in general we societally have this expectation that sex = Penis in Vagina, and everything else is just foreplay. I know I did when we started in the swinging lifestyle. Since then I've learned techniques and talents that make every aspect of the experience something worth holding onto, taking time with, and thus the PIV is not AS important. As for it not counting, if I am lucky enough to spend any sexual time with a sexy lady. I consider it "counting".

Kendra: Is Penis-in-Vagina an important goal in swinging, or just a nice option to have? Do you know couples who are all about "scoring," or are most swinger couples into the experience of trying new sex with new people, and the details aren't that important?

Cooper: Well, most of the swingers I know are full swap swingers. This doesn't mean that PIV happens every time, but it does mean it's always there as an option, and usually happens. That said, if it wasn't going to happen for the night, I certainly wouldn't say "that didn't count." I know couples of every swatch in the swinging genre and yes, many of them are about scoring, especially the level of swingers we don't necessarily enjoy playing with. (The hi, let's fuck swingers) But I would say most of the people we know and have met are more interested in exploring. PIV is a sort of expected conclusion unless you're exploring with soft swappers, I'd say.

Kendra: Is soft swap looked down upon or judged, or is it cheerfully respected? Do full swappers feel superior, or do they just realize they have different boundaries and goals when it comes to their play?

Cooper: I personally think soft swappers are cutting themselves off from potential wonderful experiences by limiting their play. But I think that about most levels of restrictions. (ie, limiting your play to the opposite sex, you're cutting yourself off from experiencing things that are awesome, though you may not like it) I also, in my experience, have found that soft swappers are generally new swingers, still very tenative, taking baby steps, which can be very beneficial when exploring such potentially emotionally charged, new territory.

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Please take a step in the right direction and come to Queen of Hearts! Ask Cooper questions of your own! And of course, you need not be a swinger per se to attend the Queen of Hearts Ball, just open-minded. Having good taste helps, too. Just wait til you see my Red Queen costume!

Podcast: Episode #18: Excuse Me, Hir

2012-02-21T03:30:00-06:00

Andy is a person who does not identify as male or female. Can society wrap their head around the fact that there are more than two genders?

Watch Now

Why Women Like Callista Gingrich Bleach Their Hair

2012-02-15T06:30:00-06:00

Why are so many people curious about Callista Gingrich? Why am I curious?

Callista Gingrich - Eyes Wide Shut

I saw this article in the New York Times all about Callista Gingrich's hair.

In it, they talk about how perfectly in control and stiff her hairstyle is, and how she does her hair that way in order to look older (she is 45, and her husband is 68).

SHE IS FIVE YEARS OLDER THAN ME.

Never once do they speculate if it's a wig.

Nor do they call out the fact that the extreme bleach job makes her head look like it's disappearing.

Personally, I think women bleach their hair in order to appeal to the male ego and play up the power disparity. Not many adults have white blond hair - but children do. So the women who opt for this unnatural hair color are trying to trick men into thinking they are like children, and that they should be treated as such.

Blond hair says, "You're so big and strong! Take care of me!"

I came to this conclusion by reading the book Why Beautiful People Have More Daughters: From Dating, Shopping, and Praying to Going to War and Becoming a Billionaire-- Two Evolutionary Psychologists Explain Why We Do What We Do.

Then again, I read in a New Yorker article that Newt thought women are always the grownups in the relationship, which means he thinks of himself as a big kid.

And another thing - Callista is almost always wearing a necklace of some sort - either a choker, or pearl necklace. Do you think she is collared? Is she in a leather family with Newt?

Newt acts just like those guys on FetLife who say they are polyamorous because "opportunistic" isn't a relationship status option. In fact, does anyone know if Newt has a profile on FetLife? I'd love to see what his list of fetishes are. Like the greedy guys on FetLife, he is grandiose and immature. Our society is not very conducive to maturity.

I wonder if Callista closes her eyes when she sleeps, or if she just has a protective membrane that slides over her glittery eyeballs. Maybe she stares at him constantly for fear of him sneaking off with another woman.

Or maybe, just maybe, she is presenting the illusion of submission to the public with her bird-like frame, pearls and platinum blond hair, but in reality she holds the key to his male chastity device.

One can dream...

There are many funny Callista comparisons out there. This is my favorite one.

Podcast: Episode #17: The Oddest Couple in Town

2012-02-14T03:30:00-06:00

For Valentine’s Day, we feature a very unusual couple whose idea of a romantic evening is pickling mice in Mountain Dew or hosting an orgy.

Watch Now

How to Make a Sexless Trip Sexy - China After Hours

2012-02-11T12:00:00-06:00

All day long in China I was a happy little tourist, but as soon as I got back to my hotel, I turned into an insatiable goddess...

I was in China for a week.

It was a purely platonic trip - all day long I met with people, toured, shopped, explored WuJiang, Shanghai, Guanzhou, Hong Kong. I wrote a Rated G essay about my trip and shared it with my friends and family - they loved it!

Chinese New Year just happened and there were so many colorful displays

Hong Kong was sooo romantic

This sign was funny!

But I was so horny!

So every night, when I retired to my hotel room solo, I would find ways to safely explore my sexuality.

I took sexy pics to send to my lovers.

I showered in the awesome see-through shower:

I took pics of my new gold silk nightie and robe:

Here is a better shot of just the nightie:

I took pics of my new pearl necklace:

Here is a better shot:

I web cammed with my partner at 3am. I watched him jerk off and cum on web cam for the first time. Even though he had two dates with beautiful women while I was gone, he still missed me so much!

I masturbated every morning and night, using lube and my fingers. The release felt sooo good and was a nice change from my usual Hitachi Magic Wand habit.

I thought up nasty fantasies and shared them with my partner...

I'm going to go lie on the bed now, lube up my fingers, pretend you are coming to me in the dark, standing over me, staring up me hungrily, wanting to possess me. Finally you get your dick out and start playing with it as you watch me, you're just gonna jerk off, but no, you can't help yourself. You reach out and touch me ever so gently. I stir slightly, and it sets a fire in you, you grow bolder and want to possess this little innocent prey animal. You play a game with yourself and see how close you can get your hard dick to my face, it's barely touching my cheek, finally you rub the swollen cock head against my face, it's straining, it's made contact, it's so hot, full of energy and danger. You rub it back on forth against my cheek, it's torture for you, finally you turn my head slightly, mouth is parted, you slide your cock into my mouth. My eyes fly open, wide and afraid, but as soon as I realize what is going on, I relax and close my eyes, accept this situation, the fact that I have a cock in my mouth, it's so hard and smooth and delicious. It fits so nicely, fills my skull. You put your hands on my face and jaw and work your cock slowly in and out of my mouth, you're on the verge of bursting, you can't believe you're doing this but fuck it, too late now, gotta finish and get this demon out. You pick up the pace and urgently fuck my face, your cock is fierce but your hands on me are as gentle as you can manage to cradle my jaw to keep my mouth right where you want it, I can hardly breathe, I'm choking, but still trying not to make a sound, it's just for a moment, your demons explode in my mouth, course back in my throat, flood my soul. I have tears in my eyes. You shudder, immediately withdraw, and retreat. Left alone, I gulp in disbelief. What just happened?

and this one...

I have this new odd twist fantasy going on - it involves Steffy. In it, you are an intelligent animal, you don't speak at all, you're not a thuggish beast but are like a dog/bear/lion/person?? I am teaching you how to fuck and be with a woman, because I want you to breed, and I'm using Steffy as the model. She is happy and willing for you to explore her. She is smiling and helpful. I show you how to touch her, suck her breasts. I show you her pussy, she spreads her legs helpfully, she's lying back on the bed. I ask her to play with herself as I fondle your dick, I suck it to get it hard but of course it's already super revved up and ready to go....where? I position Steffy how I want her, we try various positions in the fantasy but for this scenario she is bent over the end of the bed, presenting her ass and pussy to you. It's like she and I are experimenting with a really sweet, inquisitive dog. Your cock is engorged with blood, it's pulsing, it wants to go somewhere. I guide it to her pussy, rub it up and down and around, tease you both, finally I get it to her velvety tight entrance and push you into her, I instruct you to move back and forth, we are all so willing and it's working so well, I take your hand and put it on her hip so you can grasp her, you're a natural, we're going to milk you, you don't say any words but you groan and growl with lust and pleasure. Your orgasm cums so naturally and it's so amazing, you push all the way inside her as deep as you can and just explode, gripping her hips hard, your awesome animal cock unleashing all this intensity. Yes, we are so proud of you! You did what we wanted and now we all cuddle on the bed. We're gonna keep you around!

And now, it's so good to be home. I'm loving The Year of the Dragon so far...

Podcast: Episode #16: Kickin' Ass & Talkin' Pain

2012-02-07T22:25:54-06:00

Claire is a woman who thrives on extreme pain. Find out what makes her sex life like Fear Factor, and why she does it!

Watch Now

Fuck Yeah China!

2012-01-30T06:15:00-06:00

I'll be in China until Feb. 7. Have lots of good sex while I'm gone, OK?

This was an image I used on
my blog four years ago

Last year I was sued, was out of work, and was about to lose my house. Fast forward three months.

For the second time in my life, I'm getting a free trip to China. I leave tomorrow and will be gone until Feb. 7.

The last time I went was about four years ago. In that post I wrote:

"So I'm going to be in China for two weeks. How the fuck this happened is anyone's guess. I can't wait to be a goddess over there - I hear they'll dig my long blond hair. (Guess I'll shave it when I get back? I haven't decided.)"

HA! It took me two more years to muster the courage to shave my head, but I did it!

I'll be mostly in the Shanghai area. I hear it's one of the most vertical cities in the world, not just up, but down. You could live underground there and never see the light of day. Everything is so amplified there. 20 million people live in the city of Shanghai. (For comparison, 34 million live in the entire state of California.) I could stand some culture shock, and I always like experiencing new things.

Excerpt of a letter from my host in China:

"Welcome to China. Suzhou is one of the beautiful city in China, Suzhou Gardens are the best famous, there are some ancient towns in Suzhou, such as ZHOUZHUANG Town, TONGLI Town. Suzhou is worth to visit city, but there is a litter cold in February, please keep warm."

Can you imagine if I tried writing him back in Chinese? Can you say LOL in Chinese??

So here's the deal: You all know I drink, fuck, tweet and post updates on facebook like there's no tomorrow. I'm also a slave to this website (slave is an appropriate term because I DON'T GET PAID.) I'm also addicted to my smart - no, wait - trickphone.

Well, for one week, I'm going to eschew all these things. I shall throw off the shackles of familiarity (no Hitachi Magic Wand!) and embark on a new routine (helllo, hand).

People, those are a lot of addictions to address. This is going to be so good for me.

If you need to get in touch, I'll be checking email: kendra @thebeautifulkind.com

I'm going to miss my people! Matthew and I soaked each other up this weekend and I'm seeing my daughter one last time before I take the 14 hour flight halfway around the world.

I've been studying up on China in preparation for the trip. One of the books I'm reading is The Man Who Loved China: The Fantastic Story of the Eccentric Scientist Who Unlocked the Mysteries of the Middle Kingdom.

I thought it would be a pretty dry read, but I have a thing for quirky scientists who get obsessed with things. I was pleasantly surprised to learn that the main character, Joseph Needham, was an enthusiastic nudist and practiced non-monogamy.

He married his wife Dorothy on Friday the 13th, 1924, and they had an open, international marriage that lasted 63 years. Interestingly, when Dorothy died in 1987, he married his long-time (as in 50 years) mistress, Lu Gwei-Djen. But she wasn't really a mistress, because they all hung out together, traveling and doing research. Sigh, sounds so romantic!

One thing I won't be giving up while I'm there is good food. I can't wait to eat real Chinese food, meet new people, stay in nice hotels and have my mind blown!

Hustler Party Recap!

2012-01-26T20:30:00-06:00

At the Hustler magazine party I had a creeper, met new people, and autographed a breast for the first time.

Remember this video I did last month where I showed off the dress from Sin City Playwear I was supposed to wear to my Hustler magazine party?

Yes, this one:

It's "one size fits most", but it looks like a shirt, doesn't it? Or maybe a onesie for a baby?

I decided it would be sexier if I wore a bandage on my thumb, so I enlisted a friend who could pull this scrap of a dress off.

Meet Ashley:

I figured if she strutted around the party wearing the dress, it would take the pressure off me.

I am so smart.

My very talented friend (the same one who sings the TBK theme song!) gave me a classier (read: age-approrpiate) dress to wear, and did my hair and makeup until I looked like Annette Bening. See? She's good!

We set up camp at the Hustler store on Natural Bridge Road.

I did not feel like the same woman who was featured in Hustler magazine, and I did not resemble her, either. I traded in the hippie hair for something more sophisticated.

Here is a censored version of one of the pics in the article:

Here's what the censored version looks like when you ask a smartass like Cap'n Marrrrk to touch it up:

The blue-bearded bastard gave me a merkin with his mug on it!

Hustler store = amazing hosts! They offered a glorious array of sexy products, and everyone got 20% off their purchase. In addition, they had three bags of awesome toys to give away to attendees that contained awesome toys such as glass dildos and a spiderweb restraint system. They also put out a fruit and cheese tray next to a fanned display of the magazine. Photographer Connie LaFlam brought along her own entourage.

I didn't want to autograph anything - that makes me feel really weird - but if someone asked, I did it, and I did it in all-block letters across my artificially hairless armpits so it looked like a 3rd grader signed it.

About 30? 40? 50? people showed up to the party throughout the evening. Some were good friends, some were from the SEX+STL community, and some were NEW BLOOD! YESSS!!!

David Wraith took pics for us, bless his soul. Here's the one he took of Ashley and me:

Here's a pic of Ashley rockin' the dress:

I begged David to get a closeup, and he obliged:

Don't you want to bounce quarters off it?!

Men swarmed her so bad it was funny/stupid - she could have collected dicks like a headhunter that night. She was like mama duck and they trailed behind her like darling drooling ducklings. She had to tape the dress to her thighs, because with every step it wiggled up her hips as if coaxed by the ghost of a pervert.

She wore six-inch cobalt heels and had only her amazing mane of curls to keep herself warm. She giddily confided in me that she felt like a "slutty Cinderella" and would definitely wear the dress again - with jeans next time.

I autographed a woman's breast - a first for me - and had to resist the urge to sign HER name instead of mine.

People treated me like a celebrity, which was surreal. They looked at me funny, as if they were trying to figure out if I was a powerful sex symbol, or merely ordinary. My dad ran around telling people who he was - he always gets a kick out of that. I'm so fortunate to have a family that's proud of what I do.

This one guy who spied on me peeing at a party (why he felt the need to spy on me when there were 50 naked people downstairs is beyond me) lurked behind a display of dildos for a while until he finally saw that I was somewhat alone. He took that moment to approach me, which made me feel cornered and uncomfortable. He asked me when the next party was, but before I could say, "You're not invited," my partner Matthew came up to us, which caused the creeper to scurry away. No doubt he thought he was going to get bounced.

Lots of dear friends were there, including SEX+STL co-founder Anna, and David Wraith's girlfriend Elaine, who GIFTED ME WITH THIS PAINTING she did of me:

Two of my latest crushes, Shine and Dan were there, as well as Chad and Steffy, aka Rockabilly Couple!

Doesn't this pic look like we're having a baby together?!

God it was an amazing whirlwind night!

After we wrapped it up there, we went to a friend's house for an afterparty, where we got nice and drunk.

Then Matthew and I went home and fucked passionately and passed out.

In the morning, we fucked three more times - in the bed, shower, etc. I felt like our sex life was a chapter book! One where we live happily ever after...

And you know what? Two parties, 50 friends, one creeper, a bout of mini-porn-mag-celebrity, a bottle of wine, five hours of sleep and four fucks later, I managed to get to work 15 minutes early.

Now THAT'S Responsible Hedonism, people.

Stabbed in the Back. Literally.

2012-01-26T06:00:00-06:00

After a fight with his girlfriend, he went to bed. When she climbed on top of him, he thought it was for makeup sex. He was wrong.

Watch your back.

There are four qualities you need to have in order to be good relationship material. They are:

- Agreeability

- Conscientiousness

- Confidence

- Sanity

As my friend RainMan found out the hard way, the woman he was dating lacked one or more of these qualities. Here is his gutwrenching story, in his own words:

"I was sound asleep when my girlfriend came into the room. She climbed on top of me (I sleep on my stomach), waking me up. I figured it was time for the requisite makeup sex. I was very wrong.

We'd had a fight that evening about my decision to move to another town. We hadn't been dating long enough for it to even be an option that she'd come with me, and the move was essentially ending things.

She, like all the girls I'd dated back then, was very dramatic. We all know a few, the types who turn everything into a major fight. I guess this was too serious of a slight in her eyes to let it go.

To look at her, you'd never think she'd be that crazy. She was average height, build, brunette, had the typical girl-next door look.

She'd grabbed the pocket knife (a folding knife with a 3” blade) sitting next to my wallet and keys when she came into the bedroom, and stabbed me in the upper back. There's an odd moment right after it happens, when you're still half-asleep, that you don't really register what just happened.

Once the pain hit, I jumped out of bed and tried to get to the door, grabbing my keys along the way. She was blocking my exit, still holding the knife. We struggled for a few seconds as I tried to get the knife away from her, ending up with two slashes across my right hand for my efforts.

Eventually I was able to get by and ran out the front door to my car in the parking lot. I swear I must have looked like the Road Runner going across the parking lot, probably with a little dust cloud trailing behind me. I drove to the hospital, still not sure how serious the wound was. I wasn't bleeding badly, but who knew what was going on internally.

It was a shooting pain, all over my torso. Cold at first, but turned into a strong burning sensation (I'm guessing from the bleeding?). Once the adrenaline hit, the pain wasn't as noticeable. It came back after the adrenaline wore off, and it was more of a throbbing pain. The weird part is that there was also a sensation of pressure, like the knife was still in the wound.

They checked me out at the ER, ran a bunch of tests and found that I was quite lucky: she hadn't done any real damage. Between the relatively short blade, her choice of location and the low force she used, she had managed to miss hitting anything vital. I was running purely off adrenaline, so my heart was racing and I was fighting not to go into shock or start panicking. I was all over the map emotionally.

The next couple days I crashed (read: hid) at a friend's house, and got him to go load my stuff into a moving van. As soon as my place in the new town was ready, I was on the road.

The days immediately after, I was mostly angry at myself. It was that sort of "Wait a minute, I'm a smart guy. How the fuck did I end up like this?" feeling. That I didn't date at all for almost three years after is a pretty good indicator of how it affected me long-term. And once I did start up again, I was definitely paranoid. Anything even remotely similar to the crazy girls and I'd bail immediately. I've gotten much better since, but it was rough at first.

In an odd way, it was actually the reactions of the people who found out that did more damage to my trust of people than the actual attack. My guy friends aren't exactly the talk-about-your-feelings type (they served their role of kicking my butt whenever I started getting mopey, though), but I told three of my female friends about it. For two of them, gender loyalty trumped friendship, and they tried to pin the attack on me and find something I did that would justify it. Yeah, we haven't talked since...

That was the end of my crazy-girl phase, and in fact I didn't date at all for almost three years afterward. I've still got the two scars (pretty faint by this point) on my hand, which makes for a very uncomfortable time when any of my current girls want to play the “how'd you get your scars” game. I usually lie and say I cut my hand cleaning up glass from a broken window. Crazy exes are best left in the past.

As for her, she's in jail. Not from that night, she was never charged with anything. The knife magically disappeared and there were no witnesses. I found out from a friend that she assaulted one of the guys who came after me, earning herself an eight-year sentence after doing some serious damage to him. All in all, I suppose I came out relatively unscathed.

I should have been smart enough not to end up in that situation. Hell, I knew she was a little crazy when I first met her. But like many people, I kept going, figuring I could keep things under control.

Lesson learned."

The Pedo Van Game

2012-01-25T06:00:00-06:00

My daughter and I play a game that might be in bad taste, but it's definitely better than the real thing.

Pedo vans are everywhere!

You know the game Slug Bug?

Well, my daughter taught me a new road game that's a sick variation on that. (Note: Punching is optional, and we're a non-violent family.)

One day I was driving along and she pointed to a white van and announced, "Pedo Van."

"What are you talking about?"

"White vans are what pedophiles drive," she explained.

Excuse me?! I thought they were work vans. Silly me.

I asked, "Where did you learn THAT?"

"From the internet," she said simply.

After I finished telling her that the internet is not the most reliable information source, I quickly got into the spirit of things and started noticing white vans EVERYWHERE.

In order to count as a Pedo Van, it has to have no windows on the sides. The older and creepier it appears, the better. It can't have writing on the side like "Beverly's Flowers" or "Bob's Seafood," but suggestive names such as "Reem Your Pipes" or "St. Anthony's Church" are acceptable.

Now everytime I see a white van, I compulsively blurt, "Pedo Van." For instance, one time I saw a whole row of them lined up in front of a catering business. When I exclaimed, "Look at all those Pedo Vans!" my daughter breathed, "It's a Pedo CONVENTION."

Then one time we saw a white van parked in an office parking lot after hours.

After I announced the perfunctory "Pedo Van," my daughter shot back, "Pedo Idiot - he should be parked at a playground, not an office building, sheesh!"

So now we have something to bond over besides tea parties and Harry Potter books.

I've taken to muttering Pedo Van under my breath out and about, even when I'm alone. What can I say, I'm a sucker for sick jokes.

As a parent, I like to keep tabs on all the child molester stories in the news. Unfortunately, there are ASSLOADS of them. Almost as many as there are Pedo Vans.

"Good news, honey!" I told my daughter after perusing an article (I found on the internet), "According to this article, now that you're 11 you no longer have to worry about pedophilia! Now you just need to worry about hebephilia. And well, possibly pedohebephilia."

She said, "OK, so when I turn 18, I just have to worry about plain old rapists?"

I laughed and said, "Not if the SlutWalk movement has their way!"

Then there's Maddox's "How to Spot a Pedophile" article and quiz. (In the interest of research, I took the quiz and scored an 11 out of 18.)

Pedophilia Awareness

All kidding aside, there are many other interesting related articles and websites out there. For example, there really was a pedophile convention last August in Lynchburg, VA, and I'm not talking about NAMBLA.

It was hosted by a group called B4U-ACT and had real live pedophiles, or "minor-attracted persons," in attendance. B4U-ACT's motto is "Living in Truth and Dignity." They believe there is an unfair stigma in our society when it comes to pedophilia, and the unhealthy way we handle it (FEAR! OUTRAGE! DENIAL!) can cause more problems than if we approached the issue with compassion and a willingness to be educated.

Nothing is a more of a hot button topic than linking children and sex. A recent move to recognize pedophilia as a disability in Greece is a good example of how an attempt to get a handle on a nation's health can twist faster than you can say "panties-in-a-bunch." I'll bet I get accused of being a child molester just for having the audacity to address the taboo topic.

And what about all the scandals involving hot blond teachers and 14-yr-old boys? Browse this slideshow and you be the judge. Which deserved jailtime, and which were wrongfully persecuted?

As far as I'm concerned, you can be sexually attracted to whoever and whatever you want, as long as you don't touch what you shouldn't. It would be nice if we all knew who was hands off, but alas, we are human, and if there's one thing for certain, our species is an unpredictible and emotional lot.

I wish there was a "You Break It, You Buy It" policy in the sex realm. Instead, we have a few bad apples running around robbing people of their sexuality, and those bad apples are like food poisoning that can linger for years.

As parents, it is our job to educate ourselves and our children about the realities of life. We should be fiercely protective of our children, and do our best to put them first without sacrificing too much of ourselves. Trust your gut, and do your research. The RAINN website is a great place to start. (In response to the recent scandal, Penn State raised $500,000 for RAINN's National Sexual Assault Online Hotline, by the way.)

Instead of raising innocent children, we should raise knowing children. I know for a fact that I've cultivated an open and honest relationship with my daughter so that she knows she can come to me with any questions or issues.

She has the benefit of living in a guilt and shame-free home that is relaxed enough to joke about sensitive topics, which can lead, believe it or not, to important trauma-preventing conversations.