The Beauty Mommy

One More Recipe, and My Baking Challenge

2012-06-03T21:28:00.002-04:00

Okay, I set out to do that avocado post with the sole intention of posting my favorite new avocado recipe, and I completely forgot about it. This is a recipe for people who may not think they love avocados - Avocado Ice Pops
Take the flesh of two avocados, and combine in a blender with 1/2 cup of agave nectar or simple syrup (the recipe I tried called for a simple syrup made by dissolving 1/2 cup of sugar in 1 cup of water and letting it boil and cool before adding to the avocado) and 2 tbs of lime juice. Freeze into ice pops. These are so creamy and mild tasting, and if you puree really well, until there are no telltale chunks, even the most reluctant kid will love it. Lola did!
This weekend, we are staying a Hyatt resort near Disney World, and we are making around Main Street Disney when I saw an outpost of Babycakes, the famously vegan, clean bakery. Their display was so enticing and so beautiful that I stopped to have a peek, and snagged a menu and a card. And as I was walking away, the last piece of an idea I've been thinking about for weeks came to me. I am going to embark on a clean eating baking challenge this summer. Now, although I love to cook, baking has always been a bit trickier - my results have never been consistent, and I've always frankly been intimidated by it. And why bother, when the most delicious desserts - far more elegant looking than anything I could create - were so easy to buy. So I told myself, a couple of years ago, that I would only bother to bake if what I made was substantially better - as in healthier - than anything I could buy. Otherwise, why bother? So this summer, my goal is to learn to make clean, healthy versions of the following basic recipes:
1. Whole Wheat Pizza Dough: I have to conquer my fear of doughss of all sorts, and this seems like a
good place to start. Whole wheat pizza dough is a great foundation to healthy homemade pizzas, calzones and other stuffed lunch or dinner ideas, flatbreads, etc. I will experiment with a couple of recipes, but this one from Gracious Pantry looks like a good place to start.
2. Whole Wheat Pie Crust: Again, a great versatile recipe - not just for desserts, but also for savory dishes like quiche. Clean Eating Magazine has a recipe I've always wanted to try.
3. Whole Grain Bread: I think I will try the shortcut recipe from America's Test Kitchen Healthy Family Cookbook. It uses Bob's Red Mill 7 grain cereal as a base, so you don't have to buy a million different flours.
4. Chocolate Cake: A little trickier, but I'd like to master a treat that is as good for my girls bodies as it is for their spirits. I'm sure the Babycakes cookbook has some great ideas.
5. Chocolate Chip Cookies: I've tried the Deceptively Delicious version with chick peas in the batter, which I loved, but can I make the whole thing healthier?

So who wants to join me? I am planning to start with the Whole Wheat Pizza Dough this week. I'd love to hear if you have a great, clean pizza dough recipe, or if you want to attempt one for the first time!

3 New Uses for Avocados

2012-06-01T21:51:00.002-04:00

I love, love, love avocados, but until recently, they were the fruit that I always bought and never ate. They would sit, neglected, in my crisper drawer or in a fruit basket on the counter, shriveling away, lonely and unloved. It just seemed - and I know this sounds ridiculous - like a lot of work to open one up when I wanted a snack. And then, when I lamely attempted Bon Appetit magazine's Food Lover's Cleanse last year, I spotted the recipe for an 1) Avocado Tartine. Like most of my favorite recipes, it's not really a recipe at all. It's a couple of ingredients thrown together in mere seconds: Mash up some avocado, add lime juice, a dash of salt (optional) and a little sprinkling of crushed red pepper flakes. Spread on toasted whole grain bread. Voila! One of the only things I consistently want to eat for lunch. On one of my favorite food blogs, ever, is The Gracious Pantry. I love how Tiffany makes clean eating approachable and elegant. I can get lost on the site for hours. She calls it Avocado Toast, and tops mashed avocado with black pepper and Hawaiian black salt. Yum.

2. Avocado Dressing: I read a letter from a food editor where she casually mentioned using avocado as the base for a salad dressing instead of mayonnaise, and I loved it. Because I hate mayonnaise. Avocado makes the dressing creamy without adding any bad fats. I came across this recipe for Blender Avocado Dressing and I adore it.
In a blender, pulse together one ripe avocado, one clove of garlic, 2 T of parsley, 2 T of lemon juice, salt, and white pepper. Blend. Add 2 T of olive oil while still running. You can also add 1 T of yogurt.

3. Avocado & Grapefruit Salad: I have the same problem with grapefruit that I have with avocado.... I love it, but always forget to eat it. I guess I am just a lazy eater. This combination is flawless. Of course it is. It's an Ina Garten recipe - always elegant without being fussy. This would be perfect for a girls lunch with some crusty bread. (Unless my sister was there. She hates avocados and grapefruit. Seriously!) It combines 2 grapefruit, 4 avocados, and a yummy mustard-based vinaigrette. Click here for the recipe.

Look Ma, No Aluminum!

2012-05-30T22:31:00.001-04:00

Still reading, after that lame attempt at a subject? I applaud you. Let's just say that it's been a long day, and that's the best I could come up with. Believe it or not, this is a product review, and it's for a category I have long wanted to review, as unglamorous as it may seem. This is a blog about deodorant. (TMI alert... Keep reading only if you don't mind hearing about my personal sweat style).
First, let me start by saying I don't need really need deodorant or anything. I mean, it's not like I sweat. Truth be told, as much as I wish I had inherited my mother's total lack of sweat glands, I have been known to, oh, perspire occasionally, although I must admit it still takes a lot for me to feel hot. (Wait. That sounded totally inappropriate. Scratch that!) Anyway, something about motherhood has made me feel, for the first time ever, that my old standby, Secret, wasn't cutting it. Most days it did just fine, but on really intense humid days, or after a trip to the beach, I wasn't feeling it. I tried the Clinical strength but Kevin dissuaded me from it - he didn't think using an extra strength product to solve an imaginary problem was a good idea. Ha ha...
Besides the fact that motherhood has forced me to be more physical than I ever have, it has also made me rethink the chemicals I am putting onto, and therefore into, my body. I already use all natural everything on my girls - no sulfates, parabens, etc. I've even invested in all natural makeup for little girls from Luna Organics. I liked them so much I gave them as party favors for Lola's 5th birthday.

And I bought all natural nail polish from Piggy Paints, also a favorite, although the application takes a bit of getting used to...

And I'd cut many of those chemicals from my own products. But I just couldn't scrimp on deodorant. For a while, a friend talked me into trying a new, all natural liquid deodorant that she claimed was as effective as those super-strength kinds... It wasn't. And I wasn't about to start rubbing a rock under my arms. I tried a couple of other natural brands, with limited success. I really really wanted the super-chic Fresh Sugar Deodorant to work... but sadly, it didn't. It smelled lovely but it didn't help wetness. I also tried Nature's Gate, which was also amazing smelling but never, ever dried. So when I received a stick of Lavanila to test, I was skeptical. Now let me start by saying that I love Lavanila. Their portable fragrances are a must-have, in my book, and their scents just make me so happy! But a deodorant...? I put it on a shelf in my bathroom, because it was so pretty, and went on with my day. Until last night, when I realized that my trusty stick of Secret was all out. I spotted that lovely stick of Lavanila and decided to give it a shot. Now, I might add that this wasn't a great day to test a new deodorant. My morning started with an outdoor chapel service followed by volunteering for Field Day at Lola's school and ending with me getting into our pool to encourage Eva during her swimming lesson. (Note to self: White dry-clean only Tibi shorts are NOT appropriate Field Day attire. Especially when you were signed up for the egg-on-spoon relay.)

Anyway, the point is, and I do have one, the Lavanila was amazing!!! Really, truly amazing. The scent and the way it goes on are both so luxurious that it feels like you are giving yourself a spa treatment, but the best part is that it WORKS!!!! It really truly works. I stayed bone-dry and fresh all day long, with no white residue! Sure, it's $18, but in my opinion, it's worth every dime. After all, what's more important than smelling amazing. Oh, yeah, your health... : )

5 Chic Ways to Shield Your Skin from the Sun

2012-05-28T21:54:00.000-04:00

I prepare for a new season the same way some people prepare for storms: I take an inventory of what I have, come up with a detailed list of what I need, and go SHOPPING! With the sheer insanity that was spring, some style necessities have gone unbought, and now I am in full catch-up mode. Since style and sun protection are primary concerns, I decided to investigate the current options in sun-protective clothing, usually a sad, dated little segment of the market. My practical streak (I swear I have one) loves the easy breeziness of sun protective clothing, but most of it is not at all stylish. Fortunately, that is changing. Here, the most stylish ways to protect your skin:

1. Parasol colorblock dress, $285: A chic resort-inspired line designed by former Vogue (and current Town & Country) editor Alexandra Kotur and lawyer Tiffany Moller, Parasol offers contemporary sunwear for the seriously fashion-conscious woman - and children, too. I love the entire line, but this colorblock dress is my pick this season.

2. Cabana Life Crochet Dress, $86: I had a hard time narrowing down a top pick from this line, a longtime favorite of mine, but I loved the versatility of this dress, which can go from the pool to drinks with ease. Who knew covered up could be so cute?

3. Coolibar Sun Hat, $49: Essential style, with added protection.

4. Mott 50 Connolly Wrap Dress, $119: I was floored by this chic, timeless style. There is absolutely nothing about it that says sun-protective. A must for sightseeing!

5. Mott 50 Michelle Contrast Tunic, $135: With its classic preppy style - this is a versatile piece you'll wear all summer long.

My First Weekend as a Stylist, Part II

2012-05-25T21:05:00.000-04:00

As I mentioned in the last blog, I just spent my first jam-packed weekend as an official stylist with The Stylist Online! After meetings and a full day of shopping in Orlando, we awoke to my first ever Style Dial Workshop Saturday morning with the most gracious hostess, Elizabeth. We Dialed a dozen or so of her closest friends and Susan, Amy and I went through the whole workshop presentation. The group was very attentive, taking notes and asking questions. What a great experience for my first ever workshop. That evening, The Stylist Online hosted the stylists, local board members, and spouses at a dinner where we talked and laughed for hours.

The next afternoon. The Stylist Online was a sponsor for the Project Hope fashion show to benefit the Comprehensive Cancer Center at Florida Hospital Memorial Medical Center. Nearly 500 people turned up for the show, in which local personalities modeled clothes from Jos A Bank, The Loft and White House Black Market. So many standout looks, but my favorites included these from White House...

My First Weekend as a Stylist

2012-05-22T22:20:00.001-04:00

I've been a self-proclaimed stylist for years. I've styled photo shoots and revamped closets and offered unsolicited advice on my friends' clothing choices, but until very recently, I'd never made it official. Enter The Stylist Online. When my friend/social media adviser Darlynn Nangano mentioned that the company was looking for stylists, in our area, I was thrilled. I wasn't aware, until later, that there was a local connection, and that the founder/CEO Amy Brown Wister was an Ormond Beach native.

The best thing about the training is that it has equipped me with a system, a strategy for doing what used to be a largely intuitive process. It takes the guesswork out of the equation, and it saves a lot of time and hassle in the process. Once a client gets Dialed, she has the confidence to know that she can walk into a store and go exactly for the pieces that will work for her body type and her wardrobe. It's so empowering. I saw it this weekend for the first time, as I did my first ever Style Dial Workshop and my first event as a stylist. The whirlwind weekend started with a stylist lunch on Thursday, followed by a shopping trip to some nearby stores to scout some stylish options for Style Dials 1, 2, and 3. Here are some of my favorite looks from Loft:

Friday, we were Orlando-bound with a group of a dozen or so stylish women for Chanfrau & Chanfrau's First Annual Woman's Right to Shoes Event... We spent a few hours at Mall at Millenia visiting stylish spots like Tory Burch, Jimmy Choo, Tiffany, J. Crew, Bloomingdale's and Anthropologie, and emerged with heavy bags and light wallets. Here, a few of the items we picked up:

Tomorrow, part 2 of my first official weekend as a stylist!

Mother's Week Continues: Simple Ways to Recharge

2012-05-17T22:31:00.002-04:00

I dropped the ball on Mother's Week a little bit, but this month has literally been one of the busiest of my life. I have no shortage of ideas, though. Just time. Today I was thinking about how important it is for moms to take the time to decompress. When we don't, we get sick, as several of my mom friends have this week. I am looking forward to using the spa gift certificate my sweet husband gave me for mother's day, when I have the time, but mostly, I am trying to find small ways to recharge every day. Here are a few simple, inexpensive ideas:
1. Spending a few minutes in the pick up line listening to an inspirational talk show or reading a magazine while drinking a cup of tea. (Eva is content watching a show on the IPAD)
2. Taking a shower or bath in a dimly lit bathroom (during the day, I just don't turn the lights on. Don't know why - but it's very relaxing)
3. Enjoying some cuddles on the couch with my girls while watching a movie. Hugs have real power!
4. Spending some time outside on a beautiful day, watching my girls explore flowers and bugs and the beauty of nature
5. A few minutes alone at Ulta or Sephora, trying on new lipstick shades
6. A quick chat on the phone with my mom, sister, or a good friend.
7. Turning the volume up on a favorite old song on the radio and singing really really loudly with my girls.
8. Having a crazy dance party with my girls to one of the music channels on TV.
9. Flipping through a catalog in bed while drinking a cup of tea before going to sleep.
10. Taking a few minutes in bed to smooth on some yummy smelling creams and body oils.

What little things do you do to recharge? This week, make a point of doing them more often!

Mother's Week!

2012-05-14T21:26:00.000-04:00

Mother's Day sounds so measly, when you think about it. After all, what's a day? It passes much too quickly, and many of my friends spent it doing what they do the other 364 days a year - taking care of other people. Several of my mom friends had to prep their kids and take them to a theater performance yesterday (and one of them was ill while doing this), while others catered to out-of-town sisters, mothers in law, and more. While my day got off to a wonderful start, I ended it on the couch with a headache. Can we say do-over? That's why I think we deserve more than a day. We deserve a week. At least. So for the next few days, I am celebrating moms everywhere by offering ideas for ways to make our lives easier, more stylish, and more fun! I started yesterday with a list of 5 affordable ways to spoil yourself, and today, the theme continues. Here, a few of things I wish I had received... and which I might just be buying for myself.

1. A Journal For Moms: I was recently sent a copy of For My Children: A Mother'sJournal of Memories, Wishes and Wisdom, $14.95, by Dionna Ford and was blown away. Inside one slim, beautiful volume is page after page of lovely illustrations and creative prompts about everything from vacations to traditions. I've always wanted to create a journal like this on my own, but never got around to it. Now, I don't have to.

2. Alberta Ferretti for Impulse Lace Pencil Skirt, $69, Macy's: High end style comes down to earth with Macy's Impulse collections, which feature top designers doing limited edition lines. If you thought Alberta Ferretti's trademark prints and feminine style were out of reach, you will love her line for Macy's. My favorite piece is this femme, lacy pencil skirt. You'll wear it all season long.

Personalized Stationery and Decorative Objects by Erin Condren: I have always been obsessed with gorgeous stationery, even (and maybe especially) in this digital age. Erin Condren's new Viva Espana collection is stylish and memorable - a modern take on old world motifs. I love everything from the personalized notepads to the IPhone and IPad covers, but I find the personalized acrylic tray, above, $119, completely irresistible.

Mama Mio Skin and Body Care: I relied heavily on this luxe, pampering line of products during my pregnancies, and they are still a favorite. Their signature scent, Gravida, still takes me almost immediately to those precious first days of mommyhood. The scent was designed to appeal to even the most sensitive of noses, which may be why it's one of the most soothing, calming fragrances I've ever experienced. Their OMega shower cream and Clean Slate facial cleanser are daily rituals for me.

Luxe Nightwear from Carole Hochman and On Gossamer: While dressing for bedtime used to be an event (chemise, matching robe, and yes, the occasional pouf-trimmed mule), these days, the last thing I want to feel on my down time is uncomfortable. Scratchy lace and fussy styles have been retired, at least for now. Fortunately, designers are offering ways to combine comfort with style and sex appeal. I've always loved the lighter-than-air underthings from On Gossamer, and these gorgeous PJs combine comfort with the hot-mama-ness we all crave. The pair in Pink Sapphire, above, is $79. Carole Hochman's Midnight Collection robes and chemises are as luxurious as they are lovely. I am obsessed with this pretty Sea of Love chemise, above. currently $46.99, a 40% savings.

5 Stylish Steals for Spring

2012-05-13T22:30:00.001-04:00

Admittedly, my latest must-have list was a little pricey, so I tried to rein myself in and find some stylish, and superaffordable, picks for spring! Here, a few of my favorites:

The Webster at Target Cream Wallpaper Beachbag, $29.99, Target: Love the new Shops at Target concept, which brings hip boutiques from around the country to a Target near you. The Webster's collection is my fave, and fittingly, since they are designed for a Florida lifestyle. This bag is chic enough to do double duty.

Patterned Sweetheart Sundress, $34.94, Old Navy: There's something Mad Men-esque about this classic dress... It makes me want to grab my husband and have a picnic in the park.

Christian Siriano for PayLess Rosa Strappy Sandal, $39.99: Project Runway alum Siriano has designed a superaffordable, stylish line for PayLess, and these are my faves. Love the details and the eye-popping shade!

Red Carter Mermaid One Piece Swimsuit, $79, Hautelook: As much as I love a discount store steal, the best bargains, in my book, are when you manage to score a great deal on an expensive item. That's why I love flash sales! This bathing suit is sparkly enough to appeal to my daughters, and flattering enough for nearly every body type.

Pink Skinny Jeans, $24.99, Ideeli: The trend of the season - colored jeans - at a down to earth price. These come in a variety of shades, but pink (surprise!) is my favorite.

Five Musts for Spring

2012-05-09T21:31:00.002-04:00

Since I was such a downer yesterday, I decided to lift my own mood, and hopefully someone else's, by talking about my favorite subject: shopping. A few fun things for spring are sure to lift my mood! Here are my top picks:

Hudson Loulou Jeans, $198, zappos.com: These make me drool. I must have them...Some great color options, like olive with a yellow stripe, black, etc. but for me there is no contest: this cranberry-colored pair wins!

Debbie Crochet Dress, $450, Tory Burch: I just adore this dress, which is cool yet classic at the same time. And I could wear it everywhere!

Kate Spade Wicker Park Sherri, $378, katespade.com: There were two things I wanted in a new spring bag: color and straw. This scenestealing bag features both!

BCBGeneration Frankee Sandals, $110, Dillard's: I love the combination of color and neutral in these very wearable wedges.

Island Oasis necklace, $59.50, Banana Republic: This necklace is so summery, so stunning, and such a steal! It looks way more expensive than it is!

I'm Back - Sort Of

2012-05-08T21:30:00.001-04:00

I am fine. Really, I am fine. I just wanted to set everyone's mind at ease. I know you feared the worst - that I had been talked to death by two sweet little brown-haired girls, or buried under a mountain of laundry, each item sporting its own unique and mysterious stain, or wandering aimlessly around the local mall, wondering what happened to my former life. In reality, none of these calamities have befallen me. Here, in a nutshell, is what has happened over the last two weeks:

12 trips to Party City

11 loads of laundry

10 Junior League meetings

9 CMT rehearsals

8 attempts at a logo redesign (look for the new one to debut soon!)

7 school related events

6 years with Lola

5 photo shoots

4 days as snack mom

3 birthday parties for Lola (see #6, above)

2 sweet house guests from overseas

1 column written (see link at right!)

And in the last two days, Lola came home with a number (sort of like a warning) for not exhibiting self control, and also informed that she has fat thighs. Lola, who is barely 6 and slight enough for a breeze to knock her over. I had no good response to that. I just cried.

This motherhood thing is hard. It is so hard and so heartbreaking and so daunting. Some days seem impossible, and every decision seems fraught with the potential for disaster.

I don't know about you, but I feel like I deserve a day all to myself this year. Forgive me for not wanting to repeat last year's Mother's Day, when we took the kids to a bounce-house-place, or this year's birthday, which I celebrated at Legoland. I want one day all to myself, with nothing on the agenda. I don't even know how I would spend it, and that's not the point. The point is that it would be all mine.

There's no harm in dreaming...

The Beauty Mommy Mixer!

2012-04-30T21:52:00.001-04:00

One week ago today, I had the rare privilege of hanging out with a group of stylish mamas at my Beauty Mommy Mixer, which was held at my friend Aimee's brand new spot, Whim Whim Art Studio. What a beautiful setting for a night of fashion and fun!

Here I am with Whim Wham owner Aimee Gurtis!

The evening started with a presentation by a talented, and glamorous, team of MAC makeup artists, who updated us on the hottest trends of the season! They also gave makeovers to some already gorgeous moms.

After the MAC team spoke, I gave my fashion presentations, although, judging from my stylish guests, from left, Erin, with me, Jill, and Ashley, no help was needed. My first talk was on the top fashion trends of the season (check out my Pinterest board, Mixer, for links to my top picks!) and another entitled Wear This, Not That. I concluded with 5 Items Every Woman Should Own. Look for the scoop from these presentations in upcoming blogs. I concluded with a quick rundown on dealing with a picky eater!

Here, my friends Jean and Ashley illustrate the "pop of color" trend.

One highlight of the evening was a team from Rodan + Fields Dermatologists! Kimberly Clark introduced the group to the award-winning line developed by the team behind ProActiv. We were all excited by this results-driven line, and the moms lined up to hear Kimberly's skincare advice.

After the fashion and beauty presentations, my friend Heather Post of The Etiquette Seed spoke about instilling manners in children, even at a young age. One of her best tips: Involve them in your conversations with other adults so that they can learn conversational skills! Love her tips!

And since no fashion event is complete without shopping, we were treated to a posh private shopping party featuring the designs of some supertalented moms. Karla Leschitz of MerciBOWcoup, makes stunning, unique custom hair bows and accessories, some with matching outfits, and Mandy Ryan, who fashions suncatchers stunning enough to be worn as jewelry.

Guests also left with samples from CANFO Natural Products, including their most popular product, FlushMe, a 2-Day Cleanse, and Eye Care, formulated for those of us who spend too much time at the computer! (Shown above, with samples, Erum, Kymbrough, and Heather!) I am currently using (and loving!) BeautifyMe, so I will be posting a review soon! Mrs. Meyers, a personal favorite of mine, sent samples of its heavenly-scented dish soap as well as coupons for a full sized product. Love! And of course there were mascara samples from MAC and skincare goodies from Rodan + Fields. Orlando-based Silly Lips was also kind enough to send coupons for their all natural lip balms. Love the cheeky vintage packaging!

Eat, Pray, Love Revisited

2012-04-29T21:59:00.004-04:00

There are lots of things I am not. Outdoorsy. Tall, Neat. Mathematically inclined. But one thing I've always considered myself is nice. I try to be, anyway. It's the way I was brought up, and I generally go out of my way to avoid being mean or snippy or short. Of course, sometimes it happens. And when it happens, the recipient, unfortunately, is usually my husband. I have been known to say charming things like: "Why is the TV so loud??? My head hurts. Eva talks constantly!" and "How can one person have so much laundry. All I ever do is laundry!" and "I can't take anymore whining! That's all I hear, all day long!" Naturally, as I say this, I am whining. And naturally, my husband points this out.
"You can't whine when you are telling them not to whine."
He immediately regrets this comment.
Sometimes, of course, it's my girls who get the worst of it. "You have to watch what you are doing, Lola! Why are you always breaking things or bumping into things! Pay attention!" Or: "Eva - I can't listen to to you every single second. Sometimes mommy needs quiet!"
Sigh. I guess I can be mean and short and snippy. Not that this is my intention. I want to be patient and soft spoken and a bottomless fountain of love, but there are days when I am just so tired. There are days when every hour is packed and every button is pushed and it takes every last fiber of my being to make it from lights on to lights out. When I tumble into bed at the end of the day wondering how I lost control of my day, my patience, and my dream of perfect mommyhood.
And I know I am not alone.
I was talking to a friend Friday night who told me about the rough day she had with her adorable, angelic-looking two year old. Her daughter had spent much of the day spilling everything she could get her hands on (dry cereal all over Mommy's bed, crayons out of the box, etc.) and saying "No!" By the time the babysitter arrived, my friend gladly handed her over.
And last week, a very sweet, easygoing mom at Eva's Little Gym class, the kind of mom who never seems to mind running around after her toddler son, and even seems to enjoy it, told the group of us the story of how, after a particularly stressful, exhausting day, she took off the moment her husband walked in the door from work. She didn't say a word. She just got in the car and left.
Why didn't I think of that?
And while talking to the moms in my French group, my supersmart friend Liz, an intellectual and an English professor, eloquently summarized a mom's dilemma using various literary and feminist references, but concluded by saying: "The reality is that it is just so hard!"
It is hard. And that's why we need each other. We need confirmation that there are other mothers out there, in the trenches, fighting the good fight, doing their best and some days, falling far short of their ideal. We need to be reminded that kids grow up quickly, that they are amazingly resilient, and that this, too, shall pass. Whether or not we want it to. That's why I am so happy to be in the middle of Saving Super Mom, a timely, relevant Bible study that is gently reminding me of why I bother with all of this to begin with. Right now, I am trying to refocus on the really important things in my life, and to me, they can be summed up in the title of a bestseller that has been on my must-read list for a couple of years: Eat Pray Love. I haven't read it, but the title pretty much sums up the three essentials of life. So here's my take on making the most of the important things:
Eat: Fundamental, yes, but far from simple. When I spoke to Karen LeBillon, she said that the French have a word, aliment, that is not entirely translatable. It means food, yes, but it also means nourishment. We eat, of course, but often it is whatever is around, or whatever is left on our kids plates, and we don't usually take the time to really care for ourselves, whether that means preparing a quick, healthy breakfast or taking our vitamins, exercising or going to sleep half an hour earlier. And we all know what happens when Mommy doesn't feel well. The world falls apart. My mom is fond of reminding me: "Take care of yourself, because nobody will ever care for them the way that you do."
Pray: As I struggle to settle on a time of day that is best for me to have my quiet time, I try to remind myself that when I have that time doesn't matter - just as long as I find a way to work it in, most days. So I've been keeping my Bible and devotional books in my car, listening to uplifting talk radio or music as I drive, and generally trying to have a more prayerful attitude throughout the day. Some days it's a struggle, but when I manage to "pray without ceasing", I find that the entire mood of the day is different. There is more peace, less panic.
Love: A few years ago, I read something in a parenting magazine about how you should make sure that your eyes light up every time your child enters the room. At the time, my oldest daughter, Lola, was a newborn, and she didn't enter the room - I did. And every time I saw her she took my breath away. These days, when comings and goings are more frequent and more frantic, I find myself having to pause and remind myself to try to always, always see my girls through loving eyes. Sometimes it's not easy, but it can mean the difference between correction and criticism, between building a child up and tearing them down. I know there are times when my words are unnecessarily harsh, or when the punishment exceeds the crime. The solution, as I see it, begins and ends with love. Approaching the stresses of motherhood in a loving way will help me separate the mountains from the molehills, and help make me a better mommy.
Now if only I could stop whining.

Clinton Kelly Tells Moms What to Wear, Part II

2012-04-28T22:12:00.000-04:00

The New Mom Uniform

So, since the hoodie/baggie tee/cropped pant/cross-trainer look isn't working for him, what's Clinton's prescription for a new mom uniform? "Great dark washed jeans, a cute colorful ballet flat, a beautiful short sleeve printed blouse, and a cardigan with a great pop of color." The man is a genius. That's exactly how I want to look, and how I try to look , on a good day. (Let's talk about me, for a moment. Don't pretend you didn't see this coming. A couple of weeks ago, I did a shoot to update my blog photos, and in one shot I wore my dark AG Stilt jeans, a ruffled J. Crew long tank, a printed Liberty of London for Target scarf, and a bright yellow Lilly Pulitzer cardigan. Sigh. Clearly, Clinton and I share the same views on mommy style. We could start a crusade... But first I have to do something about my hair...)

The Must Nots

But I digress. Clinton and I share another belief: If an item of clothing is named for its purpose, it should generally be reserved for that purpose. "The problem with yoga pants is that they are called yoga pants for a reason. It's athletic wear, and unless you are an athlete or actively participating in athletics, you shouldn't wear them. It's a copout. People wear them because they don't want to be bothered... putting on pants. It's so exhausting." Ditto with cross trainers, which are, no surprise here, for cross training. There are, of course, some exceptions. Swimsuits are absolutely appropriate attire for almost anywhere your day takes you, from running errands to playdates to lunch with a friend. Trust me on this.

Clinton continues: "It's not that any one thing is awful, it's just that people wear them the wrong way. Yoga pants are for yoga, leggings are not pants... Every item of clothing should come with a warning label, like this will kill you. Maybe it's not obvious. Pajama pants should come with a label saying 'don't wear these out of the house.' Or 'wearing leggings as pants will get people to laugh at you behind your back.'"

The Musts

So, now that we know what not to wear, I asked Clinton which essential items every woman should own, and he started rattling them off: "I think every woman needs a great cocktail dress, a fabulous day dress, a pencil skirt, flattering jeans the cut of which depends on her body type, cute flats, great sandals, a great pair of boots, a variety of cotton blouses, cashmere sweaters, great cardigans, casual jackets, a clutch, a day bag."

A Closet Full of Clothes...

Clinton says that there is a remarkable difference between the approach that American women and European women have to shopping. "I’ve encountered women with a closet full of junk sweatshirts, t-shirts, bad lightwashed jeans, and I’ve also seen a ton of women who are impulse shoppers and have a completely mismatched wardrobe and no idea what to wear them with. Most American women have too much low quality junk, and they are more concerned about quantity than quality. In Europe, women spend their money on good quality pieces, then they spend money to have them tailored and they always look great. People say they don't have the money to buy nice clothes, but if you added up all the money you spent on junk you would have plenty of money to spend on the good stuff."

Shopping With a Plan

"Most women have no shopping strategy whatsoever," Clinton says. "I always tell women to use the 2 and 2 rule. Are there 2 differnet aspects of my life that I can wear this, for example work and evening, and are there two other pieces in my closet that it will go with. If you don’t have the bottoms that go with the top, you have to ask yourself if you can wear it with jeans, khakis, your black pencil skirt."

Face Your Fashion Fears

When I asked Clinton how he handled objections like "I never wear belts" or "I can't wear color", he takes a philosophical turn. "I would say to stop living your life based on what you don’t do. I think that is a yucky way to live. 'I don’t do this,' and 'I don’t that.' So you are just completely happy whre you are? What’s the worst that could happen? If you try it on and it doesn’t look good then take it off. I will try anything new and that’s the way I live my life. If you are afraid of how people think about you, then I would reassess whether you should live your life based on fear and think about whether you are really happy with the way that you are living your life." Well said, Clinton.

Clinton Kelly Tells Moms What to Wear, Part 1

2012-04-26T22:11:00.002-04:00

As I mentioned earlier, I had the pleasure of speaking to my fashion hero, Clinton Kelly, who is as funny, warm, and down to earth in person (okay - over the phone, but still) as he is on his hit show, TLC's What Not To Wear. Clinton is also a cohost of ABC's The Chew, the author of Freakin' Fabulous, and my bedside fave, Oh No She Didn't! Clinton has partnered with Macy's since 2005, conducting style seminars around the country, and on May 5, Clinton and Macy's will celebrate spring with an event at Orlando's Mall of Millenia. We discuss how What Not To Wear has changed over the years. "We have definitely evolved. At the beginning we were sassier and poked fun at people, but I’m a different person than I was nine years ago. I am 43 now. I only want to help people who want to be helped. The comedy part has worn thin for me."

Clinton agreed that style advice differs for moms. "I’ve seen the way the average mom dresses," he says, and a lot of moms have given up. Their kids are first, so they can’t be anywhere near the top of the list. I’ve seen moms make the mistake of wearing the mom uniform: a sweatshirt or a hoodie over a one size fits all t-shirt, a mom jean or cropped pants, and a cross trainer sneaker. Those are probably the biggest mistakes, and there are very simple alternatives that will really increase your style quotient exponentially."

His suggestions? "Instead of hoodies and sweatshirts, casual jackets give the same warmth and comfort and there is shape built into them and they are inherently more stylish than sweats. If your body is not built like a rectangle, why put rectangle shapes on your body. Instead of that t-shirt that clings to every lump and bump, try casual blouses. A blouse doesn't have to be fancy, but just a top that is made for women with seams or darts or details like a ruffle. And there's nothing wrong with a cropped pant necessarily, just as long as it’s not a copout, so they don’t have to hem their pants. They are not for every height or at every length; a walking short is generally preferable and more polished,and it hits just above the knee, or the pedal pusher just below the knee. There are so many alternatives to cross trainers, like ballet flats with an arch are really comfortable, or sneakers that are cute for running around town, or flats or sandals."

Tomorrow, the truth about yoga pants, the essential items for every woman's closet, and Clinton's suggestion for a new, improved mom uniform!

Clinton Kelly and Other News

2012-04-22T21:30:00.001-04:00

Sorry I've been a little delinquent about blogging the last couple of days, but it has been crazy in the Manley household. I've taken Eva on her first ever field trip (the zoo!), Lola to her first ever rock concert (Go Fresh Beats!), hosted a potluck, attended one birthday party and completely forgot about another one. And the craziness continues this week: Tomorrow, I have the privilege of interviewing the incomparable Clinton Kelly, Host of TLC's What Not To Wear and author of Oh No She Didn't!: The Top 100 Style Mistakes Women Make and How to Avoid Them! He is a fashion legend, in my book, and I am thrilled to have the opportunity. Look for the scoop from Clinton in an upcoming blog!
Also, tomorrow night I host my second Beauty Mommy Mixer, an evening of fun and fashion for area moms. I am very excited to be hosting the event at Whim Wham Art Studio, a paint your own pottery studio owned by my good friend Aimee Gurtis. I am also thrilled that a team of MAC makeup artists will be treating the moms to mini-makeovers and a makeup lesson, while skincare experts from Rodan & Fields will be on hand to provide skincare demos. Plus, guests will have the chance to shop for everything from bows to suncatchers, all made by moms.
Finally, Wednesday I have my next shoot for my column, and I get the opportunity to feature two very fashionable moms! Whew!
Hope your week is filled with family, fun and fashion!

1645 Pieces of Energy

2012-04-19T22:21:00.000-04:00

Over the weekend, as my husband worked on a house project, Eva, my endlessly entertaining, extremely talkative 4 year old complained that Daddy wouldn't let her help, even though she had "16 hundred and 45 pieces of energy!" So that's where it all went! Unlike Eva, I don't have an excess of energy. I do, however, have 1645 things to do, and I always seem to run out of steam before the end of the day. My husband and parents always end up blaming it on my diet. They're always convinced I am not eating enough, or eating enough of the right things, during the day. And of course that's true, but I'm doing the best I can. Some days, it's hard to pause to eat, much less eat right, throughout the day. So, aside from diet and exercise (what's that?) - I need to find some quick, healthy energy boosters that will keep me going throughout the day. Here, a few of the pick-me-ups on my shopping list:

1. Omega XL: This is one of the priciest omegas I've found, but it's apparently astonishingly good. At least that's what the infomercial said, so I bought it. Now I need to find the energy to take it.

2. Fatigue Fighting Cocktail from Dr Oz: More vitamins. Dr. Oz recommends 50 mg B Complex Vitaminsand 1000 iu of Vitamin D3 to enhance energy.

3. Sleep: There's nothing I like less, except exercise. Even when I am really, really tired, I fight sleep with the tenacity of a 2-year-old asking for one more story. But I need it. Probably sooner rather than later.

4. Carry snacks: I already do this for my kids, so it wouldn't kill me to throw some nuts or an apple or something into my tote before I leave the house - to keep the blood sugar from dropping.

5. Juicing: I will use my juicer more regularly. Maybe I will try this recipe, from juicerecipesnow.com:

Energy Juice Recipe #1 – Get-up-and-go Greens
1 apples
3 celery stalks
handful of spinach
handful of kale
1″ slice of ginger

This get-up-and-go juice is a fantastic energy enhancer. It’s packed with blood-purifying greens, minerals and vitamins. Spinach and kale are abundant with beta-carotene and vitamin C. It helps with liver cleansing and supports blood flow. Celery is an extremely alkaline vegetable and helps with digestion. It gives you a good amount of magnesium, calcium and natural sodium, which together helps transmit signals from our brains to our muscles so that they function properly, clearly a benefit for energy levels. Ginger is excellent at helping to reduce inflammation in the body, especially in the joints, therefore helping to support maneuverability.

Stress-Saving Tips for Moms

2012-04-16T22:25:00.000-04:00

One of the things I love about my current Bible study, Saving SuperMom, is that the focus is practical as well as spiritual, and on how related the two really are. If you are not setting aside any time in your daily schedule for quiet time - as hard as it may be to do so - then you may just be too busy! I so recognized myself in the story about the mom, rushing around in a day filled with Junior League commitments, pickups and dropoffs, delivering dinner to friends. etc. This week we covered practical ways to free up some time and manage the "big stuff" - the major, non-negotiable time-drains. We all have them: laundry, carpools/driving, work, home schooling. Then we discussed strategies for making these daily tasks easier and more manageable. Here were some of the stress-saving tips from some of the moms in our group.

Laundry
This was a big one for most of us, except for one lucky mom, whose husband does it. : ) Others had help from husbands, housekeepers, and babysitters, but in most cases, the responsibility falls squarely on the mom's shoulders. Here, a few of our strategies:
1. Gather laundry in one central place, rather than hampers all over the house. (My aside: In our house, we have 1 downstairs, in the laundry room, where I also sort, 1 in the master bedroom, and 1 on the girls' floor.) Then you don't have to go all over the house collecting laundry.
2. Build in systems that work: Most of us tended to put away the kids clothes around bedtime, when we are already in their rooms. Jaime leaves a basket of clean clothes outside the girls rooms when the sitter arrives, so she can help the girls put them away. Erin keeps white baskets for clean clothes and brown baskets for dirty clothes, because nothing is more frustrating than rewashing clothes that were already clean.The wonderful lady who cleans my house every week also does all the sheets and towels - a lifesaver!
3. Pick 2 days a week (Tuesday and Friday for me) to do laundry... Then it will never pile up and get out of control.
4. Throw the kids clothes in with the adults, whenever possible/practical. Either wash the entire family's clothes in baby friendly fragrance-free detergent, or go with the regular detergent for the whole family.
5. Stick socks in a mesh bag and wash them that way, so they are all together when they come out. (I got this one from the Bible Study, but I've been doing it myself for a few weeks.

Cooking and Grocery Shopping
1. Pick one day a week that you do the bulk of your grocery shopping, and go armed with a list organized by section (produce, dairy, etc). I clean out the fridge on Sundays and grocery shop on Mondays.
2. If you can avoid grocery shopping with kids, by all means do! You will save time, sanity, and money.
3. Double up meals and freeze half for night when you don't have time to cook.
4. Plan ahead. If you are hosting a barbecue on Saturday, double your potato salad recipe to take to the church picnic on Sunday. You can also do the same when delivering dinner to friends.
5. Have a couple of standby meals you can make with food from your pantry. I love Patak's simmer sauces. They come in a jar and easily transform chopped chicken or tofu or veggies into dinner, with a side of rice. Whole grain pasta and a good jarred sauce always makes my family happy. Salmon cakes and a salad are fast and easy to make with canned (wild caught) salmon.

Driving, Driving, and More Driving
My husband hates it, but my car is my second home. If I didn't stash returns and donations in the trunk, snacks and reading material in the passenger seat, and toys in the back seat, my life would be significantly harder. Here are some more tips:
1. Keep reading material, including catalogs, magazines, and even a Bible, in your car so that you can take advantage of time spent waiting in pickup lines.
2. Keep coupons, receipts and store loyalty cards in your car so that they are always handy when you need them.
3. An IPAD with cellular service lets your kids watch Netflix in the car. Genius. (Not that I abuse it or anything)
4. Skip fast food by bringing lunch with you for those times when your little one will be in the car at lunchtime. (Or better yet - go home and eat there!). I like the healthy, shelf-stable lunches from GoPicnic, which have a complete meal in one little cardboard box.
5. Other things to keep in the car: Wipes, pop up paper towels from Viva (they have a dispenser box for the car!), bandages, a mini first aid kit, Kleenex, and a snack bar or two for when you realize you are out of the house for a stretch and forgot to eat.

When I Was a Supermodel...

2012-04-15T21:55:00.001-04:00

Ha! Made you look! (Sorry - I spend a lot of time around young children). As I'm sure you have guessed, I was never a model, super or otherwise, although at one point in my life (circa 1989) I thought that big hair and a petite body made me the ideal candidate for runway superstardom.

This was me, then... Everyone wore heavy foundation a couple of shades too light. It was considered super stylish. Trust me.

But this blog isn't about me. (Weird, huh?) It's about supermodels you may have actually heard of. Like Heidi Klum. And some girl named Gisele. And Kate somebody-or-other. PeekYou, a people search engine, rated the highest paid supermodels according to their web presence, as measured by their PeekScore. According to the company, the PeekScore takes into account "your known presence and activity on the Internet, including but not limited to; your blogging, participation in social networks, the number of your friends, followers, or readers, the amount of web content you create, and your prominence in the news." And the winner is...

With a PeekScore of 10 out of a possible 10, Klum ranks as the supermodel with the highest internet presence, followed closely by Naomi Campbell and Kate Moss. (And you thought it would be me!)

In more supermodel news, Victoria's Secret fave Alessandra Ambrosio only gets prettier as she gets pregnant-er (I swear, that's a word!). Apparently, she keeps her famous legs smooth with the help of her Philips Satin Perfect Epilator: "Since it's small and easy to use, I can take it in my carry on anywhere around the world, so I'm always smooth and ready for photo shoots or just to have fun." Wow, Alessandra. Me too! (We supermodels have so much in common...) Her other beauty secrets:

"Water: I have to stay hydrated and love a cold bottle of water when the weather gets warm. Plus, it keeps my skin healthy and glowing.

Bikinis: You can never be too prepared for a spontaneous trip to the beach or some fun in the sun.

Short Dresses: I love my legs and short dresses give me a chance to show a little bit of leg. Nothing's better than a gread dress and a pair of amazing heels!"

While some of Ambrosio's tips may be supermodel-specific (bikinis are not my friend, for example) we can all benefit from smooth legs, so I am checking out the Philips Satin Perfect Epilator. If it helps me look more Alessandra-like, I am all for it. Wonder how it does on cellulite?

A Retro Barbie Birthday Party

2012-04-13T23:01:00.000-04:00

My little Lola will be six in a few weeks, and I've got my hands full deciding what to do for her birthday party. The thing is, Lola is one of those children who knows exactly what she wants. Except when she doesn't. She is the most indecisive child on the planet. There is only one thing she knows for sure: she wants a surprise birthday party. A surprise party? For a 6 year old? Strange, for sure, but a cinch to pull off. We also finally settled on a Barbie theme, and I love the innocence and design of retro Barbie. I am obsessed with this retro Barbie-inspired design by the insanely talented Gwynn Wasson, but I don't have the skills to print and cut everything out. I assume I would need to use one of those cutting machines or special tools or something, and not just my kitchen scissors. I am not crafty. Well, I am, but not in that way. ;)

This one is also sweet, and so pretty, but again, how would I do this. And when???

These are fabulous and come already done. Yippee!

And this!

Cutest party hat ever!

So here I am with a birthday party to throw in 3 weeks, a theme that I love but I am not sure I can execute, and absolutely no time or energy to plan. Sigh. Better get moving. This party isn't going to plan itself. : )

The Blog I Wished I'd Written

2012-04-12T20:26:00.000-04:00

Today, I was scrolling through my Facebook feed, as I do a few times every day, when something caught my eye. At first, I ignored it, but after the 3rd or 4th post from a mom friend, I knew I had to click on the link and read it already. And so I sat, in my parked car, Eva chattering in the backseat, completely glued to the beautiful words written by this very talented woman, April Perry. I couldn't have said it better myself.
: ) Thanks April, for a much-needed wake up call. I just had to share. So go. Read it. It's genius: http://powerofmoms.com/2012/04/your-children-want-you/

Cheating in the Kitchen

2012-04-10T21:33:00.001-04:00

I had a chance to visit with my good friend Tami today, and the talk turned, as it often does, to food, and cooking, and what kids will and won't eat. I was spoiled growing up: my Middle Eastern wondermom made pita bread and baklava from scratch and a well-rounded home-cooked meal every night. I remember begging for the occasional boxed junk advertised on TV: Betty Crocker Scalloped Potatoes, for example, or Rice a Roni (remember that?). My mom would give in for a single meal, but the next night it would be back to real food. My midwestern husband grew up without homemade baklava and pita, but he did introduce me to a few of his own favorites. Some, like the Hamburger Helper he relied on frequently as a bachelor, never made their way into my kitchen (I do have some standards), but the favorite chicken recipe from his childhood, which got its creaminess and seasonings from a couple of cans of creamy soup and Lipton Golden Onion Soup mix, has made it into our regular rotation. The canned soup I've found hard to replicate, but the powdered soup mix is a cinch. As is taco seasoning blend. And ranch dressing mix. All of these mixes are as close as your spice rack, and so much healthier than the highly processed store-bought versions. They are lower in sodium, with no yucky chemicals or hydrogenated oils (yes, some spice mixes have trans fats!). Here, a few of my favorite blends:

Homemade Taco Seasoning
A simple mix of everyday spices, including garlic and onion powders and chili powder, this couldn't be easier to make. Mix up more than you need and store it in your spice rack for future use. My favorite versions are from WholeNewMom and from Food Renegade, which features the following easy ingredient list:

1 Tbsp. Chili Powder
1/4 tsp. Garlic Powder
1/4 tsp. Onion Powder
1/4 tsp. Crushed Red Pepper Flakes
1/4 tsp. Dried Oregano
1/2 tsp. Paprika
1 1/2 tsp. Ground Cumin
1 tsp. Sea Salt
1 tsp. Black Pepper (optional)

Homemade Ranch Seasoning: Again, a simple mix of spices you already have in your cabinet, this one from Amy's Finer Things. Stir some into Greek yogurt and you have a healthy dip for veggies.

1 tablespoon dried chives
1 tablespoon dried parsley
1 tablespoon dried dill weed
1 ½ teaspoons garlic powder
2 teaspoons onion salt
¾ teaspoon ground black pepper

Onion Soup Mix, from Scratch: This recipe takes seconds and will work in all your mom's old recipes. : )

8 tsp. dry minced onion

1 tsp onion powder

4 tsp beef bouillon or 4 cubs

1/4 tsp celery salt

Beautymommy Buzzometer: On My Radar This Week

2012-04-09T19:47:00.000-04:00

Hope everyone had a happy Easter! Ours seemed to last for days, from egg coloring and decorating (yes, a little late) on Friday to Sunday services and a family dinner into today, when we gathered with some good friends on our front lawn to take Easter pics with a cuddly white bunny. The highlight of the entire weekend, for me, was when Lola haltingly, but in great detail, explained the true meaning of Easter to her little friends at book club. It made me so happy to see that the message was sinking in!

1. Frugal Fashion for the Girls: Sometimes you have the sale mojo, and other times you just don't. These days, I've definitely got it, as I seem to keep stumbling into the best deals anywhere, mostly on things for my kids.From superstylish Submarine bathing suits for Lola ($80 plus dollars at boutiques) for $14.99 at Marshall's to today's catch of the day - an armload of adorable Beetlejuice items at Tuesday morning, like the dress shown above, center, for the 4th of July! So fun!

2. Zatchels Satchels: I am obsessed with the old-school style of the satchel, especially when it's updated in bold colors and fashiony prints. That's why I am loving Zatchels, a new British company that's just starting to turn up at stores stateside. There's nothing like being one of the first in the country to own a statement-making bag!

3. Bad Hair Days: Naturally, I've never had a bad hair day. I roll out of bed every morning with my hair looking perfect. That's why I practically begged my stylist, Marjan, to let me have a keratin treatment every single month. Sigh. If you too have had your share of bad hair days, you might want to submit a photo as evidence and describe how the Chi Ultimate Makeover would change your life. Just click here if you're interested!

4. ParkVisitor.com: Before I had kids, I avidly read restaurant and theater reviews in search of that weekend's entertainment. These days, my weekends are more likely to be spent at the beach or a park. Hard for an indoorsy type like myself, but with a site like ParkVisitor.com, at least I'll know what to expect when planning our next outing. More than 5000 parks are rated, and scored, based on reviews and expert input. Review your favorite parks and you could win a kayak, for even more outdoor fun.

5. Mally Beauty: Mally Roncal is more than just a celebrity makeup artist, a beauty entrepreneur, and a friend to Rachael Ray; she is also a mom of 3 (including gorgeous twins)! So no one knows better than this multiasker the importance of effortless, lasting beauty, from her "bulletproof" makeup products to her latest development, a complete 24/7 Gel Polish System for home. Now, even a home manicure can last two weeks - no appointment required. The product launches April 13 at 10pm on QVC. I know what I'll be watching Friday night!

More Reasons Why French Kids Eat Everything!

2012-04-05T21:49:00.000-04:00

When I spoke to Karen Le Billon, one of the things that struck me the most was the fundamental difference between French people and North American people when it comes to snacking. For Americans, snacking is a way of life, and for me, as a mom, it has become as much a part of our daily schedule as bedtime. When my girls were little and I would write out their schedules for my mom or a babysitter, I would always include two snacks per day - a mid-morning one and a mid-afternoon one. And, since my girls are often slow/disinterested eaters, I would mind myself clearing their snacks away in time to serve them lunch or dinner. And then I would wonder why they weren't hungry. Given the choice between snacking and real eating, my little grazers always chose snacking: And I was left frustrated by the futility of putting food out and picking it all back up again. It seemed so pointless!

But my biggest fear was that my kids would experience hunger - even for a minute, so I never left the house with assorted snacks in tow. I tried to make them healthy - organic cheese sticks, apple slices, bananas, small bags of whole grain crackers, but they were still snacks and they were still filling. And so the cycle continued, to this day. Speaking to Karen changed my attitude about snacking forever. Here's more:

Why the French Don't Snack

"The French believe that it's okay to have your stomach empty because you're in between meals; there is a difference between an empty stomach and a hungry one. French adults don’t snack; its rude to snack. A French person in an office would never eat at their desk;they only eat at the table at lunchtime. And kids don’t snack except for gouter, the traditional after school snack, but that is usually more like a small, healthy meal eaten at the table. Maybe bread, butter, a fruit compote. That's my daughters' cousins go-to after school snack - a fruit compote with no added sugar. They don't have the convenience foods that we have; we now have food everywhere -libraries, bookstores, drugstores. You can’t buy foods in a drugstore or a bookstore in France. They don’t believe it’s okay to snack. All ads for snack foods have a label like we have on cigarettes saying that it’s bad to snack.

The French do believe that it’s important to eat a good quality diet; you don’t get hungry because you have a satisfying meal."

Adjusting to North American Life

Now that Le Billon and her family are back in Vancouver, she says that they have been able to maintain most of the eating habits they "My kids do not ask for snacks anymore; they just ask for that one snack a day. It’s hard for us because school lunches are such a problem; my older daughter's school has a lunch time of ten minutes total. All of the things about food that we don’t want them to learn, like eating on the run, we teach in school. The French secret is that they are backed up by schools and communities and parents working together. It's fascinating what we can learn from that and the message for parents is not a message of blame. It's more like it's really hard in our society to feed our kids well, but here are some great ideas about what we could do, but they require the support structure. It’s really cooperative and collaborative, and a collective vs an individual responsibility."

The McDonaldization of France

I asked Le Billon the question that was at the top of my mind: How likely are French moms to pull through a drive-through on the way home to pick up dinner? The answer - not very. While France now has it's share of fast food places, their menus have been tweaked to appeal to the French palate, with more healthy options. And they still haven't really caught on among the French. "There is a lot of concern about the impact of fast food on French culture. They care about preserving the core of French food culture. We are still debating things like a soda tax and they just went ahead and implemented it. They have responded and we for various reasons have not. In schools in France, they have taste training for younger kids and older kids get lessons on food marketing, food as national heritage, and food politics. We could update home economics, for example. We have the know-how here; there is a bigger cultural moment that needs to happen."

French School Lunches vs American School Lunches

"Lunches are three to four course hot meals with fruit and veggies, and they are as little as $.20 for low income parents, $3 for typical parents. There is a nationwide ban on vending machines in schools, and they have nationally tightened nutritional requirements for all schools. Good food is important to the French. When a child comes home from school, parents ask: What did you eat for lunch today and did you enjoy it? Click here to read more about the gourmet four-course meals served to French students at schools this week.

Life as a Food Activist

Le Billon's journey started with blogging about food and has evolved into what she calls "accidental food" activism. She was chosen by the Jamie Oliver Food Foundation to be one of its Real Food Advocates. "It's good to have a conversation about how we teach our kids to eat and what we tell them to eat. I hope this book will help spark that conversation and be a part of the overall picture. I know it works for our family and for France as a whole. It's about fast, easy recipes, good structure at mealtimes, and kids who are hungry at mealtimes. We are three times more likely to have obese kids in this country. We are not learning to eat the way we used to (for those of us who grew up in the 70s) and it's common sense."

Make the Connection

I was amazed at home easy it seemed. We have all these convenience foods that are supposed to make it easier and it makes it a lot harder, and I was doing a lot more work. I saw that my kids could come to the table and eat happily, and that imposing the structure ends up making it less work and more fun. Before it was quite stressful to feed my children and now it's a pleasure and joyful to eat with them and a real moment of connectedness. A lot of people really crave that and are finding it hard to get there. It's easier than people might think. It happened in less than a year for us. Some people who read the book have applied the French food rules to their kids and they are relatively easy, commonsense rules and once you get them into place it should all make it a lot easier."

French Kids Eat Everything: A Talk With Karen Le Billon

2012-04-03T20:42:00.006-04:00

I had the amazing opportunity today to speak with Karen Le Billon, the author of the much-talked-about new book, French Kids Eat Everything, which hits stores today. Despite a schedule that included a whirl of interviews, a chat with Katie Couric on Good Morning America, and an evening book signing at a Madison Avenue store, Le Billon took the time to answer some of Beautymommy's most pressing questions about strategies for addressing picky eating.
I spoke to Le Billon from the interior of my mom-mobile, strewn as it was with a half-finished Coke can, an almost empty bag of Goldfish, and assorted bars (Clif Bars, Kind Bars, Annie's Homegrown Peanutty Bars). On the passenger seat next to me was an item I am rarely seen without: a small cooler bag holding two straw-topped bottles of water and two sippy cups of milk. Another cooler bag with an entire carton of Horizon Organic Whole Milk with DHA was nearby. Clearly, I have an irrational fear that my kids and I will be stranded at a nearby park with no food around for miles. Let's just say I like to be prepared.
Le Billon was once a snack-dispensing, Goldfish-toting mom like me. And then she moved to France, where kids eat four-course-lunches and moms refuse to pry snacks into their kids between meals, believing (and this is shocking) that if they are hungry, they will eat better at the next meal. Revolutionary!
Her newfound role as an "accidental food activist" (her own words) had a charmingly inauspicious start: She moved to her French husband's small village in the North of France, two picky daughters in tow, without a single French cookbook in her possession. "I am a full time working mom," she said. "I found the whole thing so stressful. I burned pots and pans, and I was at a loss as to what to do. I was the opposite of Julia Child. But the transformation of my eating habits and my family's eating habits were so astounding. I didn't know what French parents were doing that made them so successful at this, so I decided to look into it." So did I. Here, just a few of the ways French kids are raised to appreciate fine dining, right from the start. No arm-twisting required.

All Food Tastes Good

The French differ fundamentally in their approach to food, according to Le Billon: "The French believe that all foods taste good and that there are no bad tastes, or very few, anyway. We expect that our kids won’t like the spinach and we set them up and almost teach them not to like healthy foods. In France, one of the first things they give their children is a very thin leek soup puree, and they believe that it tastes good. Kids are innately open to all tastes."

Try, Try Again

The French assume that if you don’t like something, then you just haven’t tasted it enough times. French scientists have learned that it can take anywhere from seven to 15 tries before a child will like a new food. So now when my child rejects a new food, I say: 'That's okay. You'll like it next time.' Or she says, 'I'll like it when I grow up.' It's about simple, patient, firm, loving, exposure to as many foods as you can imagine."

Fussy Eaters vs Picky Eaters

I love the distinction that Le Billon makes between picky eaters (in my family's case, Eva) and fussy eaters (Lola). Picky eaters have a fear of trying anything new, and they want to limit their diets to a few favorites. Fussy eaters like to assert themselves through their diets, by arbitrarily refusing foods that they had previously tried and enjoyed. It's a way of testing boundaries.

French Kids Can Be Picky, Too

"Age two is when neophopia kicks in," Le Billon told me. "This is when children develop a fear of new foods, and it happens in France, too. It kicks in at the no stage, when kids are starting to say no to everything. The difference in France is that they have a way of helping kids transition out of that and overcome picky eating, and not letting it become a habit or a personality trait. It's fun; there is no bribery or coercion or force. It's about a healthy routine in which kids are exposed to a wide variety of foods."

The Family Meal

Le Billon tells me that 90 percent of French families have a sit-down family meal together every day. "They think it's as important to teach your child to eat as it is to read. The believe how a child eats affects school performance, mental and physical health, IQ... Just like reading, the investment is just a little bit of time every day. It's incremental. French families only spend 18 minutes more per day cooking than we do. Gourmet is how people eat at the very fine restaurants, but that is not how they eat at home. France has the same percentage of working moms than the U.S., and their workday is longer. They are not spending three hours in the kitchen like Julia Child. I am not someone who is into fancy food. But the French have some great ideas for simple tasty recipes that anyone can make."

The Challenge of a Picky Eater

Removing the opposition from kids is a tactic that French parents use with great success. "You don’t have to eat it, but you do have to taste it," Le Billon says. "Most of the time, over time, they will like it. My older daughter is much more of a sensitive picky eater than my younger one, but she eats mussels and she eats spinach. It removes opposition from kids If the child refuses to eat they take it away; there is no worry or anxiety, but they don't feed them again until the next meal. They don't worry too much if the child gets a little hungry. That just means they will eat better at the next meal."

Le Billon accepts that the firmness of French routine might raise objections in some American parents. "The kids don't make all the choices; the parents set the guidelines." These guidelines include structure, when a meal is served, what is served, that kids eat what adults eat, and that they have to try new foods. "It requires the parent to say 'I'm in charge,'" Le Billon says. "But it's not about being controlling or getting anxious or forcing or making this an oppositional war with my kids at all."

The Challenge of the Fussy Eater

This doesn't mean that French parents are not above a little coercion, when it's called for. "If a child is older and they are playing a game and being fussy and they used to like it, then the French don't mind insisting that a child eats. That's when they say: 'You don't have to like it, but you do have to eat it.' They only do that if the kid has eaten it and liked it in the past. There are many different reasons why kids say no; sometimes if it’s new and unfamiliar if might mean that you have to do, as the French say, tame the new food. They just have to taste it. A friend's nine year old son recently refused to eat his broccoli, which he used to eat, and I said to him: 'No one is asking you to like it, but you do have to eat it.' His dad actually told me that it was a like a magical transformation."

Tomorrow, Part II of my talk with Karen Le Billon, when we tackle snacks, convenience foods, and school lunches! Oh, and I will actually start reading the book tonight, so you'll hear my feedback as well! A demain!