SuperJaguar

Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 18 May 2017 01:15:00 +0000

The following are actual stories provided by travel agents:

1. I had someone ask for an aisle seats so that his or her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.

2. A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?"

3. I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information when she interrupted me with "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts. "Without trying to make her look like the stupid one, I calmly explained, "Capecod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa." Her response ... click.

4. A man called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that is not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state."

5. I got a call from a man who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada?" I said, "No." He said "But they look so close on the map."

6. Another man called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had a 1-hour lay over in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and I need a car to drive between the gates to save time."

7. A nice lady just called. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:20am and got into Chicago at 8:33am. I tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead of llinois, but she could not understand the concept of time zones. Finally I told her the plane went very fast, and she bought that!

8. A woman called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know who's luggage belongs to who?" I said, "No, why do you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said FAT, and I'm overweight, is there any connection?" After putting her on hold for a minute while I "looked into it" (I was actually laughing) I came back and explained the city code for Fresno is FAT, and that the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.

9. I just got off the phone with a man who asked, "How do I know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these darn planes have numbers on them."

10. A woman called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-cola on one of those computer planes." I asked if she meant to fly to Pensacola on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever."

11. A businessman called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed a visa. "Oh no I don't, I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express."

12. A woman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Hippopotamus, New York" The agent was at a loss for words. Finally, the agent: "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the customer. After some searching, the agent came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Hippopotamus anywhere." The customer retorted, "Oh don't be silly. Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?" "That's it! I knew it was a big animal!"

Pinoyify

Pinoy Jokes

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Tue, 29 Jan 2013 22:43:00 +0000

Nanay: Anak, 'di ka ba nahihiya?!
Linis ako ng linis dito, tapos ikaw laro ka lang ng laro diyan?

Anak: Inay, hindi ba mas nakakahiya kung ako nglilinis diyan
tapos ikaw nglalaro dito?!.

ipinoyjokes.com

Pinoyify

Misis Din Si Mister

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Tue, 29 Jan 2013 22:37:00 +0000

Misis: Walanghiya ka! Bakla ka pala...!
Baklaaaa!!!!!!
Diyan ka na nga!!!...

Mister: Darling, saan ka pupunta?

Misis: Maghahanap ako ng tunay na lalake!!!

Mister: Dalawahin moh hah! Tig-isa tayoh....

Haha!!

Pinoyify

Lasing

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 19 Jan 2013 20:46:00 +0000

Lasing 1: Pare! Bibilhin ko yung
MOA at LRT bukas!
Lasing 2: Ayala malls at MRT
bibilhin ko eh.
Lasing 3: Weak! PLDT,
MERALCO, BDO, LANDMARK bibilhin ko bukas!
.
.
.
.
. .
.
.
.
.
. .
.
.
.
.
. Lasing4: Kakapal ng mga muka
niyo! Sino maysabing
binebenta ko yung mga yun?

www.ipinoyjokes.com

Pinoyify

All about marriage

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sun, 19 Jun 2011 11:50:00 +0000

Fact or fiction (you make the call):

1. Marriages are made in heaven. But so again, are thunder and lightning.

2. After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin… they can’t face each other, but, they still stay together.

3. Married life is very frustrating.

.In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.

.In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.

.In the third year, they both speak and the neighbours listen..

4. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you canbe sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife is.

5. Marriage is when a man and woman become as one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

6. Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something she says. After marriage, he will fall asleep before she finish.

7. Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook. But the law allows only one wife.

8. They say when a man holds a woman’s hand before marriage, that is LOVE. After marriage, that is SELF DEFENSE.

9. A wife becomes a “SEX OBJECT” when every time the husband asks for sex she objects!

10. Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy.

11. There are two four-letter words that are offensive to men in marriage : “don’t” and “stop”, unless, they are used together (“don’t stop”).

12. Marriage is an institution where the man loses his Bachelor’s Degree and the woman gets her Master’s Degree.

13. In marriage, a man can have words with his wife, but, a woman can have paragraphs with her husband.

14. Marriage is love. Love is blind.

Therefore, marriage is an institution for the blind.

15. There are 3 stages of SEX in a married life:

Tri-weekly, try weekly and try weakly.

16. LOVE is a long sweet dream; MARRIAGE is the alarm clock.

17. When a newly married man looks happy, we know why.

But, when a 10-year married man looks happy, we wonder why.

18. Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence … a LIFE SENTENCE.

www.ipinoyjokes.com

Pinoyify

Sekyu

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 03 Mar 2011 13:20:00 +0000

Airforce: "No guts, No glory!"
Marines: "No retreat, No surrender!"
Army: "No pain, No gain!"
Naks ayaw patalo ang Security Guards: "No I.D, No entry!"

Pinoyify

Best Things to say if Caught Sleeping At Your Desk...

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 20 Nov 2010 12:31:00 +0000

"They told me at the blood bank this
might happen."

"This is just a 15 minute power-nap as
described in that time management course you sent me."

"Whew! Guess I left the top off
the White-Out You probably got here just in time!"

"I wasn't sleeping! I was
meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new
paradigm."

"I was testing my keyboard for drool
resistance."

"I was doing Yoga exercises to relieve
work-related stress."

"Damn! Why did you interrupt
me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest
problem."

"The coffee machine is broken..."

"Someone must've put decaf in the
wrong pot..."

Pinoyify

Madamot

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 07:44:00 +0000

Juan: Oys, ano yan? Pinya? Pahingi naman dyan.

Pedro: Pahingi? Nasaan ka noong nagbubungkal ako ng lupa sa ilalim ng init ng araw? Nasaan ka noong nagtatanim ako habang kumukulog, kumikidlat at
bumubuhos ang malakas na ulan? Nasaan ka noong oras na nag-aani ako na nagkalat ang maraming ahas sa dadaanan ko, noong naghihirap ako sa pagpasan ng pinya? Nasaan ka?

Juan: Nakakulong kasi ako noon! Nakapatay ako ng madamot!

Pedro: Ganun ba?
Kuha ka na, kahit ilan!
May langka pa doon!

www.ipinoyjokes.com

In A Bar

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 07:24:00 +0000

A gorgeous lady was sitin alone in a bar.

Guy: Hi There!

The lady ignored him.

Guy: You caught my atenti0n as i enter the bar, is it ok to get your nember?

Lady: If you have a BMW, a house in boracay , millions of peso bank account and 7 inches penis, then you can get my number.
But I guess you do not have it, so my answer is no!

Guy: I do not have all those, I just have a FERRARI, an ISLAND in Palawan, a billion dollar bank account. And excuse me,
I won't cut 2inches of my penis just for your numbah...

Common Sense

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 07:13:00 +0000

Isang bata, nagpasa ng blank paper sa art teacher..a

Teacher: Bakit blank ang work mo?

Bata: Nagdrawing po ako ng baka at damo.

Teacher: (tinignan ulit ang papel) San ang damo?

Bata: Ubos na po,kinain ng baka.

Teacher: (kamot sa ulo) Eh nasaan yong baka?

Bata: Ano pa gagawin ng baka dyan, eh wala ng damo? syempre umalis na po. Common sense naman mam!

May Tatlong Bampira sa Bar

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 07:01:00 +0000

RICH VAMPIRE: Oorder ako ng fresh blood.
ORDINARY VAMPIRE: Sa akin isang order na dinuguan.
POOR VAMPIRE: Hot water na lang sa akin.
WAITER: Bakit hot water lang po.?
POOR VAMPIRE: Nakapulot kasi ako ng napkin sa kanto. Mag-tsa tsaa na lang ako... Hahaha!

Katawan Lang

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 01:43:00 +0000

Isang magasawa ang dumulog sa korte para magpaannul.
Judge: Ano ang dahilan para kayo magpaannul?
Babae : ( Nagsalita habang nakayuko ) Your honor, katawan lang ang gusto niya sa akin.
Judge : Anong pruyba mo?
Babae : ( Nakayuko pa rin ) Tuwing nag love making kami tinatakpan niya ng towel ang mukha ko.
Judge : Ikaw Mister bakit mo ginawa yun?
Mister : No comment your Honor. Just see for yourself.
Misis: (Nagalit at ihinarap ang mukha sa Judge ) See bastos talaga ang taong yan.
Judge : (Habang nakatingin kay Misis. ) Annulment petition granted. Ikaw naman lalaki, bakit ngayon ka lang nagfile ng annulment? Ang tiyaga mo.

Mahal ako ni tatay

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 01:42:00 +0000

ANAK: 'Tay! Sino mas mahal mo, ako o si nanay?

TATAY: Syempre ikaw anak...

ANAK: Kaya pala kapag madaling araw,
ako po ay kinukumutan niyo
at si nanay naman po ay
hinuhubaran niyo...
sweet niyo talaga 'tay, a lab u....

COMPLETE VERSION

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 01:36:00 +0000

Dad: Anak bili mo ko soft drinks.
Anak: Coke o Pepsi?
Dad: Coke!
Anak:Diet o Regular?
Dad: Regular!
Anak:Bote O Can?
Dad: Bote!
Anak: 8 oz. o Litro?
Dad: Punyeta! Tubig na lang!
Anak: Natural o Mineral?
Dad: Mineral!
Anak: Malamig o Hindi?
Dad: Hampasin kaya kita ng walis?
Anak: Tambo o ting ting?
Dad: Animal ka!
Anak: Baka o Baboy?
Dad: Layas!
Anak: Ngayon o bukas?
Dad: Ngayon na!!!
Anak: Hatid mo ko Indi?
DAd: Patayin kaya kita?
Anak: Saksakin o barilin?
Dad: Babarilin!!
Anak: Sa Ulo o Tiyan?
Dad: Pesteeeee!!!!
Anak: Ipis o Daga??
Dad: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!

Call Girl

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 01:31:00 +0000

Misis1: Lolokohin ko ang mister ko kunwari isa akong call girl.
Misis2: O sige game ako dyan!
Nakita ni misis1 c mister...
Misis1: Hello boy pwede ka ba ngayon?
Mister: Ayoko nga sa yo kamukha mo misis ko!

Nakakasalat

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 01:23:00 +0000

Sakristan: Father, may libangan din ba ang mga Pari?
Pari: Oo, naman, pag dating ng hapon, kaming mga pari dito sa bayan ay naglalaro ng Mahjong.
Sakristan: Bakit po naman Mahjong pa ang napili niyong laro?
Pari: Kasi, dito lang kami nakakasalat ng flower, Iho!

Panalangin

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 13 Aug 2010 06:18:00 +0000

Sa loob ng simbahan ng Quiapo, isang batang pulubi ang mataimtim na nanalangin sa Diyos.

Pulubi: "Panginoon kung maaari po sana ay bigyan ninyo ako ng sampung piso dahil gutom na gutom na po ako."

Narinig sya ng isang pulis na kasalukuyan ding nagsisimba at bumilib sya sa katatagan ng bata sa pananampalataya sa Diyos. Sa kanyang habag ay dumukot sya ng limang piso at iniabot sa bata na ang sabi: "Amang, narinig ng Diyos ang panalangin mo at heto tanggapin mo ang perang ito at ibili mo ng pagkain".

Tumingala ang bata sa pulis, kinuha nya ang limang pisong iniabot at muling yumuko para manalangin: "Panginoon, salamat po sa pagdinig ninyo sa aking panalangin, pero sana naman po sa uli-uli wag na ninyong pararaanin pa sa pulis, kasi malaki na ang bawas".

Pasahe

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 11 Aug 2010 04:33:00 +0000

Sa Isang Jeep

Pasahero: Mama, magkano po yong pasahe?

Driver: 7 pesos yong minimum.

Pasahero: (Dumukot ito sa bulsa para kunin yong pera niya, ngunit sa 'di sinasadyang dahilan kulang yong pamasahe niya.) Patay, kulang 'tong pera ko. Paano kaya ito? (Nag isip ito at lumingon sa driver. Napansin niya na duling ito. Sabi niya sa kanyang sarili, tama duling 'tong driver sigurado 'pag nagbigay ako Ng 3.50 di diya mapapansin na kulang 'tong pera ko, kasi doble 'yong paningin nito. Inabot niya sa driver 'yong pera.

Ngunit laking gulat niya nong may sinabi 'yong driver sa kanya.

Driver: Kulang ito!

Pasahero: Anong kulang? Di ba sabi mo 7peso 'yong minimum?

Driver: Oo nga 7 pesos. Eh! Dalawa kaya kayo.

Ano daw?

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 07 Aug 2010 10:51:00 +0000

Mga Holidays...
Q: ano ang holiday para sa mga nanay?
A: mothers day
Q: ano ang holiday para sa mga tatay?
A: fathers day
Q: ano naman ang tawag sa holiday ng mga buntis?
A: e di, labor day!
Q: ano ang tawag sa holiday para sa mga binata?
A: Palm sunday!!!

Misis
Q: Bakit mas matataba ang mga may asawang lalaki kaysa sa mga walang asawang lalaki?

A: Kasi ang mga walang asawang lalaki, pag-uwi, titingnan ang laman ng ref niya at kapag walang nakita, humihiga na lang sa kama para matulog. Ang may asawa, pag-uwi, titingnan ang kama at makikita ang misis nila, pumupunta na lang sa kusina para buksan ang ref nila.

Q: Ano ang pinagkaiba ng lalaking tumataya sa lotto at ang lalaking nakikipag-away sa misis niya.

A: Mas malaki ang tsansa ng lalaking manalo sa lotto kaysa sa pakikipag-away sa misis niya.

Satanas
Q: Ano ang sinabi ni Satanas nang ipanganak AKO?

A: “Lintek! Isa na namang anghel ang ipinanganak.”

Q: Ano naman ang sinabi niya nang ipanganak KA?

A: “Oh, no! Hindi puwede ito! Ayoko pang mag-retire!”

Fish
Q: Ano ang sabi ng bangus nang mamamatay na siya?

A: I’m daing!

Q: Ano ang sabi ng isda nang hiwain siya sa gitna?

A: I’m tuna (two na).

Insurance
Q: Ano ang pagkakatulad ng sex at life insurance?

A: Habang tumatanda ka, tumataas ang presyo.

Dictionary for Women

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sun, 01 Aug 2010 14:02:00 +0000

Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n. A discussion that occurs when you're right, but he just hasn't realized it yet.

Airhead (er*hed) n. What a woman intentionally becomes when pulled over by a policeman.

Bar-be-que (bar*bi*q) n. You bought the groceries
, washed the lettuce, chopped the tomatoes, diced the onions, marinated the meat and cleaned everything up, but, he, "made the dinner."

Blonde jokes (blond joks) n. Jokes that are short so men can understand them.

Cantaloupe (kant*e*lope) n. Gotta get married in a church.

Clothes dryer (kloze dri*yer) n. An appliance designed to eat socks.

Diet Soda (dy*it so*da) n. A drink you buy at a convenience store to go with a half pound bag of peanut M&M's.

Eternity (e*ter*ni*tee) n. The last two minutes of a football game.

Exercise (ex*er*siz) v. To walk up and down a mall, occasionally resting to make a purchase.

Grocery List (grow*ser*ee list) n. What you spend half an hour writing, then forget to take with you to the store.

Hair Dresser (hare dres*er) n. Someone who is able to create a style you will never be able to duplicate again. See "Magician."

Hardware Store (hard*war stor) n. Similar to a black hole in space-if he goes in, he isn't coming out anytime soon.

Childbirth (child*brth) n. You get to go through 36 hours of contractions; he gets to hold your hand and say "focus,...breath...push..."

Lipstick (lip*stik) n. On your lips, coloring to enhance the beauty of your mouth. On his collar, coloring only a tramp would wear...!

Park (park) v./n. Before children, a verb meaning, "to go somewhere and neck." After children, a noun meaning a place with a swing set and slide.

Patience (pa*shens) n. The most important ingredient for dating, marriage and children. See also "tranquilizers."

Waterproof Mascara (wah*tr*pruf mas*kar*ah) n. Comes off if you cry, shower, or swim, but will not come off if you try to remove it.

Valentine's Day (val*en*tinez dae) n. A day when you have dreams of a candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance, but consider yourself lucky to get a card.

Rules For Women

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 31 Jul 2010 11:40:00 +0000

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us griping about you leaving it down.

2. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again!

3. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

4. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

5. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then you're stuck with her.

6. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

7. Crying is blackmail.

8. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

9. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.

10. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

11. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

12. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

13. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

14. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

15. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We refuse to answer.

16. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

17. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

18. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

19. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

20. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends.

21. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

22. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

23. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

24. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

25. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

26. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

27. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.

28. You have enough clothes.

29. You have too many shoes.

30. Foreign films are best left to foreigners. (Unless it's Bruce Lee or some war flick where it doesn't really matter what they're saying anyway.)

31. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together. No, it doesn't matter which quiz.

32. I am in shape. ROUND is a shape.

33. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know we really don't mind that, it's like camping.

Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 15:58:00 +0000

Upuan

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 06 Mar 2010 13:14:00 +0000

Noy Noy: Hindi ako magnanakaw!

Gibo: Ako din hindi din ako magnanakaw!

Erap: Ako babalik ako dahil hindi pa ako tapos magnakaw!

Villar: Ako din! Magnanakaw ako dahil malaki nagastos ko. Babawi na to.

GLORIA: Mga tanga wala na kayong mananakaw UBOS na.

Ways To Know You Are A Filipino

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 11:13:00 +0000

1. You point with your lips
2. You nod upwards to greet someone.
3. You collect items from hotels or restaurants "for souvenir".
4. You smile for no reason.
5. You flirt by having a foolish grin in your face while raising your eyebrows repeatedly.
6. You go to a department store and try to bargain the prices.
7. You add an unwarranted "H" to your name, i.e. "Jhun," "Bhoy," "Rhon."
8. You put your hands together in front of you as if to make a path and say "excuse, excuse" when you pass in between people or in front of the TV
9. You like everything imported or "state-side."
10. You Check the labels on clothes to see where it was made before buying.
11. You always offer food to all your visitors.
12. You say "comfort room" instead of "bathroom."
13. You say "for take out" instead of "to go."
14. You asked for "Colgate" instead of "toothpaste."
15. You asked for a "pentel-pen" or a "ball-pen" instead of just "pen."
16. You order a McDonald's instead of "hamburger"(pronounced ham-boor-jer)
17. You say "Ha?" instead of "What."
18. You say "Hoy" to get someone's attention.
19. You answer when someone yells "Hoy."
20. You turn around when someone says "Psst!"
21. Your sneeze sounds like "ahh-ching" instead of "ahh-choo."
22. You prefer to make acronyms for phrases such as "OA" for over acting, or "TNT" for, well, you know.
23. You say "air con" instead of "a/c" or air conditioner.
24. You say "brown-out" instead of "black-out."
25. You have a portrait of "The Last Supper" hanging in your dining room.
26. You own a Karaoke System.
27. You own a piano that no one ever plays.
28. You own a "barrel man" (you pull up the barrel and you see something that looks familiar. schwing...)
29. You refer to your VCR as a "beytamax
30. You have a giant wooden fork and spoon hanging somewhere in the dining room
31. Your car has too many "burloloys" like a Jipneys back in P.I.
32. You hang a Rosary on your car's rear view mirror.
33. You order a "soft drink" instead of a "soda."
34. You refer to seasonings and all other forms of monosodium glutimate as "Ajinomoto"
35. This you 'll agree 100% ... Goldilocks" means more to you than just a character in a fairytale.

Friends at Hunting

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 11:10:00 +0000

Three friends La Sallite, a UP stude, and an Atenean went on a hunting trip.

The first night, the guy from UP comes back to cabin with a big deer. The others ask him how he did it, and he cooly replies: "I saw the tracks, I followed the tracks, and bang! I got the deer!"
The next night, the guy from Ateneo comes back also with a big deer. "I saw the tracks, I followed the tracks, and bang! I got the deer!" was the Atenean's story.
So the La Sallite decides to try it himself. But the next night, as he drags himself back to the cabin, his two companions find him bruised and bloody all over. "What happened?" they ask? "Well," replies the La Sallite, "I saw the tracks, I followed the tracks, and bang! A train hit me."