The Dark Quarter

I Hope

2015-11-03T19:06:00.001-06:00

Yesterday I went to Hattiesburg to do comedy in front of a crowd of maybe a dozen people. It was in a restaurant and the food smelled amazing, but I didn't order anything. In truth, I have no idea how much money I even have, but I know its not enough. I never know how or when I would ever pay someone back for a kindness if someone asks if I wanted anything, so I always decline, even though i appreciate the offer.

I had tuna casserole earlier that I made enough of for lunch and dinner - hoping it would hold me over. It did not. "One day, this will all have been worth it." I hope.

Today, I'm not as prepared. I had sandwiches I was going to eat for dinner, but I ate them for lunch. I guess dinner is the oatmeal I saved myself and I eat in the break room long after I'm supposed to go home. I'm sure I'll be starving on the way home.

Gas has been inexpensive lately, though I'm worried about jinxing that by typing it out. I still can't chance driving all the way to Gulfport to vote and then driving back for another show.

I hang out in Ocean Springs, wondering what to do. My uncle appreciates my visits, but it's a far enough drive through some questionably maintained roads that I fear for my tires' integrity. I just did a withdrawal from my retirement fund to buy shoes, I can't do another one so soon for car repairs. My daughter is closer, but with my ex's boyfriend home, it just feels intrusive and uncomfortable even though we like one another.

Maybe I should sleep? My apnia surely won't kill me at this age without my mask. I could use the extra hours.

I'm tired. I'm hungry. I'm lonely. I'm poor. "One day this will all be worth it." I hope.

Last night I had a restless night. Fat guy wearing a seatbelt that barely stretched across my barrel chest - not a recipe for a restful car ride. I passed out at 12:30 AM to wake up at 6:00 to get ready for work, but only after eating the Doritos my girl didn't eat. I hate Doritos, but I can't afford my own snacks and by the time she came back they'd be stale. A little sirracha helped them out though.

Now I'm tired and have a show at 10. New material tonight, so that's always exciting and nerve wracking. I had to take my blood pressure meds I'm running out of to ensure I didn't stroke out from the stress. I don't always take it anymore since I can't afford a doctor to refill the prescription.

Then I'll drive home. I'll get four or five more hours sleep and do it again tomorrow. A pizza place is the venue tomorrow. I'll be starved because I won't have time to cook tonight or in the morning before work. I'll just have to wait till I get home to cook. "One day this will all have been worth it."

I hope.

Life's Katrina's - The Recovery

2015-10-13T18:36:00.000-05:00

Over the last few months I have been overwhelmingly negative on these blog posts.

There has been nothing but constant death, hardship, unrequited love, and financial ruin.

My life hasn't been entirely doom and gloom though as there have been some miraculous things happening.

I've always been thisclose to having something of mine produced, whether it's a TV pilot, a screenplay, or a premise but finally after all these years it seems that it is really happening this time.

My friend and writing partner sent me a scrip with five pages of dialogue and a premise and I ran with it. What was completed was described to me as one of the funniest things a certain professional actor had ever read. Now we have a cast, a director, and a bunch of other things you need to make a movie in waiting. I just hope this is the thing that eventually launches a career I enjoy.

My podcast had been doing really well and now I get to hang out with three of my favorite people at least once a week.

My comedy is doing a lot better than I ever imagined, honestly. I'm consistently named one of the funnier people there and I've been asked on more than one occasion to go to other venues other than the one I normally perform at.

Finally, being a father really is the greatest thing anyone could ever ask for. My little girl is my world and I really couldn't imagine my life having as much sunshine in it without her.

Life's Katrina's Part 5: Closer to Death

2015-10-13T13:47:00.002-05:00

I don't remember how old I was when I got cellulitis for the first time, but I remember that I worked at Sicily's.

I was working the oven at the time and I began feeling like I had the flu or something. I started limping and my shoe was getting progressively tighter as time went on.

I checked myself out by rolling up my pants leg and I was greeted with a swollen pink lower leg. It hurt when it was touched and was warm. Despite my protests, my manager told me to go home. I went to the doctor the next day, got antibiotics, and felt better in a week.

Cellulitis is an infection that starts in your skin. It is caused by bacteria entering your body and attacking your weakened cells due to number of things. In my case, my veins are so wide that my circulation struggles when it hits my legs, it pools up, and BAM - infection.

This would be something I became very familiar with.

It was many years later that I would get it again. At the time, I had ballooned up to almost 600 lbs - a byproduct of rejection and heartache. Less than a year before, Hurricane Katrina had decimated most of the coast and I had a terrible infection in my right hand.

I had grown so large that my knee had given out on me while I was trying to walk around a fitness trail and had to crawl to my car. Surgery repaired me, but a few months later I had the grand misfortune of getting cellulitis so severe that it put me in the hospital. I spent several weeks in the hospital getting IVs of medication and over the next few months, I would get cellulitis a couple more times.

I had just started dating my future ex wife when I had one of the worst - if not THE worst outbreak of cellulitis I ever had.

It was the middle of the night that I had gotten it - I know this because I woke up to go to the bathroom, but I wasn't thinking right. I stood and the pain was so excruciating I had to prop myself up with the wall on my way to and from it. Describing the pain is difficult. Imagine what it feels like when you burn yourself on the stove. Now imagine your entire lower leg feeling that way. Now throw in a severe case of the flu.

Now you're getting the idea.

Later that same night, I only barely remember wandering in the living room in my underwear looking for my keys so I could go to work with my bewildered brother's friends trying to understand why this was happening.

I was lead back to the bedroom and I slept - waking from time to time in pain. My girlfriend called me up and she knew immediately that there was something not right. She kept me talking on the phone until she showed up to take me to the hospital. I really don't remember anything after she picked me up, but I know I woke up in a hospital room. If Boo hadn't gotten me to the hospital that day, I would likely have passed away in my bed.

This was the worst time I had ever gotten cellulitis, but there have been times that it had been really close to killing me.

I used to get it maybe once every few months and then I would just go to the doctor, get some antibiotics and that would be that. I would only go to the hospital in one of those emergency situations because it was more expensive.

Well, then my insurance changed. Like anything, they were pulling more per month for the premiums, but my deductible was a lot higher too.

The last time I went to my doctor about my issues he sent me to a specialist to look to my veins for answers. I went in and the doctor did an ultrasound of my legs and told me that he couldn't figure them out so he wanted me to wear compression stockings until my legs were less swollen. In the mean time, they would prevent as many cellulitis attacks.

The issue that I ran into is that the doctor visit cost me almost $300. The specialist wanted another $300. The stockings were almost $100 and this is on top of all of the hospital debt I was accumulating in the thousands of dollars once my insurance changed. Luckily a good friend of mine was able to help with the cost of the stockings.

During this time frame I was responsible for the final expenses of my mother and mother-in-law and things had gotten terrifyingly tight.

One day I came home to a summons on my apartment door. I was being sued for one of my doctor bills and I freaked out. I literally had no money to give and I called up the collection agency who had sued me and worked out a payment plan. It was $100 a month that I honestly did not have, but I supposed I didn't have a choice.

Two months later, my father had passed away.

I was tapped out. I was terrified. I really didn't know what I could do because I had just spent my tax return (like a dumb ass) and I still had all of this debt that I had accumulated with final expenses, medical, car issues, and the stupid stuff I got into as a young adult.

I really don't know who suggested that I start a GoFundMe account, but I decided that it might be for the best because we really didn't have anywhere else to turn. We owed every loan company in the south and being the only responsible Phelps boy, I had to take on this responsibility as well.

I wish you could understand the jubilation that I felt when we raised the money to give my dad a proper send off in less than a day. I have so many people out there who love me and my dad had so many people who loved and respected him. I put the remaining amount in savings and planned on saving just a little bit more to get my parents the urns that they deserve instead of the plain black box that you receive their remains in at the funeral home.

It was about a month after my dad had passed and I knew I didn't have much money left in my checking account. I went to check my account to see if I had enough to get me a soda in the break room and I was shocked to see that not only was it empty but so was all of the money in my savings account.

My account was garnished, which frankly I had no idea was even a possibility. I had missed a payment to the collection agency in the midst of trying to get my dad's final expenses in line ad before I was able to get in contact with them, they took the totally legal step of filing a court order to pull as much money as they could from my account hoping to pay off my debt. It didn't but it certainly crippled me in away that is just disgusting. If I could afford to pay the debt off, I would have and now they had TAKEN the money I was planning on spending on my parents.

Currently, the remains are still in those black boxes until I can pay off the debt I have found myself in which, if you're paying attention, is a goal that keeps being pushed back due to my constant illness.

I try to not go to the doctor now so I don't keep getting these bills I can't pay. As I type this, I still have the case of cellulitis I went to the hospital for over a week ago. I was in "ok, this is serious enough to possibly kill me this time" mode while at work and I didn't go to the hospital till a week later when I wasn't getting any better and I've depleted the meds that were prescribed. I requested a refill in case this were to happen and the doctor told me that he couldn't and I should just go to my doctor. I don't have the $300 I need to do that. I don't have the however much I have to pay to go to Urgent Care.

I don't have anything. I'm bled dry and there are really good odds that I'll be dead soon.

Life's Katrinas Part 4 - Riding Into the Sunset

2015-09-30T13:52:00.004-05:00

I was in my early 20's before the feeling came over me that my dad was just a guy.

He was doing everything in his power to make sure that there was food in our bellies and a roof over our head and the gravity of it all never hit me until my parents decided to refinance our house and he worked like crazy to try to fix everything the adjuster said to fix before the bank would do so.

I could only aspire to my father's drive. He used to hold three jobs at one time - he was an electrician at the ship yard, a pizza delivery guy, and a volunteer at the fire department. On top of that, he was active on the ball field when my brothers and myself played, he fixed lawnmowers, and cars.

I'm so flipping lazy compared to my dad.

One day when playing in an exhibition game of "Cabbage Ball" or whatever that was, he started complaining of pain and weakness and collapsed. I was a teenager at the time and I didn't realize what was going on until I saw him writhing in pain in the back seat of our van.

He was having what would be the first of many heart attacks.

Over the years, his body may have been weakening, but he literally refused to let it stop him. This was part of his downfall.

When my mom passed away, my dad became more subdued and got to the point where he often had to use a walker to assist him. He was a doting grandfather and always wanted to spend time with my little girl. The last really good day he had was spent pushing her around on his walker as we looked at vintage cars. My little girl loved her paw-paw after many years of being afraid of him.

Things were always being asked of him and he finally wore himself out enough to the point that he continued helping people with rides, car work, and whatever was asked of him. He was always in and out of the hospital and I would sometimes skip out of work so I could go visit him. He was always weak, but smiling and joking. He was always in good spirits.

I was called and told that my dad was in the hospital again, the previous time being less than three months prior. I couldn't leave work early, so I walked over when I got off and the doctor told me that they had to do a procedure and I could not see him until the morning, but he seemed to have pneumonia and my dad was expected to recover.

I was getting ready for bed when I received a phone call from an 819 number. I immediately recognized it as the hospital. My dad's nurse was calling to tell me that my father's condition had worsened and that I needed to gather whoever I could and get to the hospital.

I sped to Ocean Springs from Gulfport, calling everyone who would want to know and picked my brother up on the way. When we got there we were told that they did not expect him to survive this hospitalization. He was stable, so we could go home.

Now this is the part of the story where I must apologize because I am terrible at time frames. This entire period is kind of a blur for me to begin with.

Since he was right next door from where I worked, I would walk over to visit. I would see a sight that is, frankly too familiar. He was unconscious. There was a tube breathing for him, feeding him, and letting him urinate. He was unresponsive as I talked to him and each time I met with the Dr. he would tell me that things were not good. He was under constant watch by the nurses who were visibly affected by our love as we talked to him.

We all knew that he would soon leave us, but we just did not want to believe it. I hadn't even spoken to him in days, as it was raining terribly the day we were supposed to meet in the park so he could visit with my little girl.

One day I walked to the hospital and was told that he will likely pass away in the night. I walked back to work, told the acting manager that I needed some time and cried in the bathroom.

It was so much to handle. First I lost my mother, then my mother in law, and now I would truly be an orphan all within a few years.

Surprisingly, my dad had taken a turn for the better. He didn't pass away that night and in fact he was awake. My visit with him was a somber one for the most part. He couldn't talk since the tubes were still in his mouth, but he was able to shake his head and nod. I didn't stay long that first day so he could rest. He was alive!

After a while, they had my dad on dialysis to try to get his kidneys functioning again and they put him in a normal room. My daughter was able to come and visit, playing with her paw paw and dancing. We were able to spend so much time together when I could.

My dad was doing so well that they thought he might be out in a few days. My Uncle was by my father's side as much as he could be along with my other uncle from out of town as well as our extended family. Having never told my Uncle about how my beliefs had changed over the years, he asked me if I felt confused - a reference to how much of a miracle this all was. To be completely honest, I wasn't. But I still didn't answer because I didn't think it would serve much of a purpose.

I had to surrender our dog during this time. He was nipping at my daughter, attacking our cat, and destroyed my apartment - things I'll go in length about in a different blog. I was a mess because I really didn't want to do it and no one I knew could take him in. As I was leaving, I received a call from my Uncle explaining that the dialysis wasn't working and he would need dialysis to live; however, if he continued to get dialysis his heart would go out. In either scenario, my dad was going to pass away.

My Uncle had offered to hospice my father until he passed away and I felt that it would be appropriate. He made the proper arrangements and that Saturday morning he would take him home.

I visited my father that evening and spoke to him for what would be the last time. There was a huge elephant in the room considering that we all knew my father was not long for this world. I gave him a big hug and kiss. Told him I loved him and thanked him.

We were planning on continuing with our lives past this until the day came. My daughter was invited to a friend of mine daughter's birthday party at a pool. We woke up early and I put my baby girl in her bathing suit and packed a little bag with clothes and dressed for swimming when my Uncle calls me to tell me that just moments earlier, my father had passed away.

I called around to tell as many people as I could as I threw clothes over the baby's bathing suit and I rushed to the hospital. God only knows why I was in such a hurry since I was basically going to see a body... It is weird to think about it.

I arrived and as soon as I got off the elevator, I was right back in that unusual mode where everyone around you knows you need support. Hugs, handshakes and backrubs from family, friends, nurses - all as I tried not to fall to pieces.

I went into the room and he looked like he was sleeping peacefully for the first time in years and without the snoring. I don't recall what I said or if I cried and we all went to my Uncle's house to try and figure things out.

This will bring us to the next part.

Dream Journal

2015-09-27T09:12:00.002-05:00

Dream journal - weirdly I can't remember my dreams, but last night I remembered two.

1. I was on a cruise with a friend of mine and my brother. I have no idea how we afforded it, but we were so close to glaciers and gorgeous scenery. Then we went to the UK where we went to Thorpe Park and I tried to contact a friend who lives in the area without success. I woke up as we were on our way back to the ship. It was amazing.

2. I was at work when I had my heart broken. All of my stress, my illness, my inability to pay for a doctor, and basically everything else built in me and I snapped - screaming at the top of my lungs. Friends of mine came over and tried to calm me down and they were mostly successful. Sobbing, I was in the midst of a mental breakdown when the person who broke my heart came in and I fried to compose myself and left. I walked to my Uncle's who was living at an intersection where a huge commotion was happening. My Uncle calmed me down and walked me to the intersection. Across from him, a funeral home. On either side was a gathering place for Wu-Tang fans and a gathering place for Juggalos.

It was bizarre.

Life's Katrinas Part 3 - Apart

2015-09-25T13:55:00.000-05:00

Our relationship was never better.

My wife, Boo and myself had never been closer than we were a few months after her mother passed away. A tragedy that affected the both of us in ways we never imagined, we had finally gotten to a place where we were happy.

Kind of.

The thing is, about two years prior we kind of figured out that we had drifted apart as a couple; however, we were trying to make it work. When our mothers passed away, it acted as a rally between us. It was a test. We needed each other in those times and we answered the call with love.

2014 would be our year.

Months into the new year, we ended up with a realization - we loved each other very much; however, neither of us felt that what we wanted in life was compatible with what the other wanted. We continued to drift apart, sure but it was unusual because we still wanted to hang out and be a part of the other's life. We were becoming platonic best friends.

Confessing our feelings about one another in a long heartfelt talk we knew we needed to divorce. We just couldn't fix what was wrong despite the three years of work trying to fix the problem. Turns out, there was no problem - more of a misinterpretation of feelings.

Not to be mistaken, we were rather upset about this development in our lives, but even though we took a third shot at fixing it briefly - it was over. It was definately over.

2014 was essentially a year of rebuilding.

Boo and I were now separated.

Living apart has helped with the transition and while she has found herself a great guy who she is now dating, my experiment in dating was...shall we say outstandingly unsuccessful and has pretty much scared me from the whole idea of dating for quite some time. Especially dating people I don't know first.

Besides, I wasn't ready.

As time has passed, I have been growing more and more depressed. I have been having these wonderful professional highs and I'm, frankly, more popular than ever. There is just a melancholy that falls over me when I get off of work.

Ever since my daughter started school there has been days I'll just sit in my desk when I clock out. Once, my friend asked as he walked out the door why I hadn't left and I didn't tell him the truth. I had no place I really wanted to be.

I would walk into my apartment, sit everything down and try not to worry about the terrible smell the dog we had left in the carpet. The cat that belonged to Boo was basically mine now, she feeling that I needed a companion - and rightfully so. I just wish I had a companion that wasn't so...scratchy.

I started trying to meet someone online, but it has mostly only been good for stand up material. Most of the women who have a lot in common with me won't respond and when they do they are generally terrible at holding conversations.

I had been talking with a lot of women I'm attracted who are friends of mine, but the only ones who flirt are in relationships. I'm certain they will lose interest once they are single. That seems to happen a lot.

I met a woman on one of the apps I had who had a lot in common with me, was supper sweet, attractive, and was SUPER into me but I have a horrible habit of knowing how and why we would break up eventually. I could see many happy years, honestly but eventually one of us would get tired of the other if our relationship had progressed. I could feel it.

This doesn't even go into the fact that I harbor a deep love for someone who knows how I feel for her. While we are happy to be best friends, I can't help but fall for her all over again every I see her. I SWEAR there are times that I'll be an idiot and think that she had fallen for me because of some little thing until eventually she told me that I needed to "stop thinking." I was and still am devastated, but that's life.

I guess I'm still not ready.

Life's Katrinas Part 2 - Take Care

2015-03-29T19:00:00.000-05:00

My mother in law had been watching our sweet Savannah since she was born and lived with us so we would have mutual help with life as well as our expenses. She was an amazing woman and became one of my best friends and a surrogate mother since mine had passed.

A year had nearly passed when my wife, Boo and myself decided to take my mother in law with us to our yearly trip to Disney World. We all felt like it was needed - I had recently lost my mother, my wife had work issues that were so morbidly awful I won't go into them, and my mother in law and never been.

Disney World is my way of decompressing. It truly seems like the only place I can go and all of my cares seem to melt away. Not surprisingly, my mother in law had a blast and was able to do so many things that she never thought she would ever be able to. The trip was fantastic and I'm glad that I was able to share with her my favorite place in the world.

A few months later on a sunny summer day, my mother in law began feeling ill while filling up Savannah's little swimming pool. She went to rest as this wasn't something too entirely strange as she was prone to suddenly feeling bad, but we all thought nothing of it.

Again, my recollection of time frames is very poor, but either later that night or the next day Boo I was awakened by my wife needing to get her mom to the car. She was going to go to the hospital to see why she wasn't feeling right. Knowing how strong her mother was, I knew this had to be serious. While waiting for Boo to get the rolling chair (I think thats what she was doing - it was a hectic moment in time), her mother - with obvious fear on her face looked me in the eye. "Take care of Barbara."

Tears started streaming down her face and I'll never forget that moment. I reassured her that everything would be fine, but I would. Shortly thereafter Boo arrived with the chair and we took her to the car, physically put her in it and she drove off. I would never see my mother in law again.

Within a year's time I lost two mothers and I took it hard. It was even more difficult in that I wasn't sure if my level of mourning was appropriate. I learned not to care. She was my friend and forget you if you think I shouldn't grieve.

Again, we had to take out loans to pay for the final expenses. This time it was a loan that we really couldn't afford, but what else were we to do?

Boo leaned on me for support and I was here for her and vice versa.

Savannah misses her maw maw, of course. She will see her picture from time to time and tell us how she loves her even to this day. She made me bawl when she saw her picture the other day and asked me where she was. "She's an angel now, hon."

"She's an angel?"

"Yes. She will always be here with us."

"OK."

Life's Katrinas: Part 1 - The Woman in the Red Top

2015-03-28T19:08:00.001-05:00

NOTE: This space used to be for the now-defunct podcast postings of The Broke Nerdcast and The Dark Quarter. If you were following this space for that content, Jay and I have a different project that you can find at www.pcpradio.com for the same type of content. What follows will be the personal thoughts I have about recent events in my life. Thank you.

2015 is my year.

This is the mindset that I went into the year with. It had to be.

Almost four years ago my wife and I sat in our car in the parking lot of a movie theater and had the discussion we knew we needed to have. We love each other dearly, but it was clear that we were following different paths and we were just now able to admit it.

We tried to make it work for the sake of our young daughter and we were mostly successful that first few months in proving that we were, sadly not the best of couples - yet the best of friends. It was a brutal realization to meet, but a necessary one.

Then I get a call that my mother had been put in the ICU.

I am terrible with time frames, but it felt like my mother was in that hospital for eternity and I never really ever found out exactly why she was there to begin with. This had happened once before and I was confident that she would be fine, but this time we were told that she wouldn't survive without the machines and the loving woman that we knew would not come back to us if she did as she lost too much oxygen to her brain.

Upon hearing this news, you could tell that my father was lost. He was losing his best friend, the love of his life, and then some. With a brave face he let us know that he had faith that my mother would be taken care of by the Lord and agreed to take her off of the ventilator.

We were all grieving in our own ways and we spent a day remembering and reflecting on our memories of her. I cried a lot.

We were all sitting at an area near the hospital when I was a woman in a red top with graying dark hair in a motorized scooter coming from the hospital toward us. She looked and moved just like my mother and I was astonished. She didn't come all the way to where we were, but she passed my wife who was taking a phone call near a pathway leading to shops and restaurants. I stood and walked toward her as she disappeared around the corner and she was gone. Not even a tire track in the dirt remained and no sound of the motor.

I walked back to the tables and asked my cousin's husband - who was also facing that way when it happened to speak to me in private so as to not seem crazy in front of everyone. I asked if he saw something out of the ordinary just before I walked away and he told me that he saw my mom. He didn't say anything though and I told him not to.

Years later, my wife would tell me that she saw my mother up close when this happened and she vanished into the alley on that same day and didn't want to sound crazy..

The next day our family met and we surrounded my mother and said our goodbyes. She faded away from us while my dad held her hand. I don't remember what it was, but he said something that made me lose my composure and I had to leave.

She passed away and it never stopped hurting.

My wife and aunt handled most of the final arrangements for my mother. Being the oldest, I knew it was my responsibility to handle the financial burden as my family has never really had money. I am no exception to this, but I made an ok living. I had to take out a loan to pay for the expenses, but I was able to take care of them and that was the most important thing. The money people gave me to help was appreciated and went right to the loan.

Despite the fact that we still knew that we were drifting apart from one another, my wife and I rekindled our friendship. I was able to lean on her in my time of need. She was there for me and thank GOD because I needed her.

Keys to the Kingdom Part Four: Disney's Hollywood Studios

2014-11-01T22:00:00.000-05:00

*NOTE: The following was written back when the original Keys to the Kingdom articles were written and I never released it because my computer died before I could edit the thing and as such - some of these things may be outdated or maybe even already announced (STUPID HAT)*

After all this time and multiple parts of my Kingdom series, here we have made it to the grand finale: Disney Hollywood Studios.

Disney Hollywood Studios is neck and neck in contention for my favorite park and for the very same reason and that is nostalgia. I remember what the Studios used to be...actual working Studios.

Yes. I miss this.

I know that Disney doesn't plan to start going back into production on those grounds, so the Studios are now a love letter to the industry. Or at least it will be once I am done with it.

Let's take a tour, shall we?

As we walk through the gates and head down Hollywood Blvd, you see the Chinese Theater that houses The Great Movie Ride. Un-obscured by the giant Mickey Hat, this is the first thing that we notice that is different.

Walking up Hollywood Blvd, we take a right down Sunset Blvd to see that the Theater of the Stars no longer is the site of the Beauty and the Beast stage show and now houses a new Tangled extravaganza with songs from the movie and climaxing with "I See the Light" in which lanterns light up and float on stage and in the audience.

Moving through a new path built off the path where the Rock N Roller Coaster is located, We come across the Animation Courtyard where the big hat has been relocated.

Replacing the Voyage of the Little Mermaid is a new Frozen attraction. Either a stage show with live actresses singing the hit soundtrack of the film, or a ride through of some of the films most memorable moments. Either way, the AC needs to be cranked and the fake snow needs to fly.
NOTE: The stage show is happening, but I put it in the wrong spot. Still want to get rid of the Mermaid show.

Pixar Place will remain mostly the same as you walk out toward a lovely themed building with two entrances.

On the right will be an entrance to "Fix It Felix!" where you can meet the stars of Disney's Wreck It Ralph. The queue winds through a small portion of the Game Central Station where you can see in the windows different licensed video game characters as they move about their business. Several interactive screens line the queue with an "attract mode" that acts like you can visit these different interactive games that you can play on the wall from different trains in GCS. Once you get into the Meet and Greet proper, the room looks like you just stepped into "Fix-It-Felix Jr.!"

On the left side of the entrance you will find the queue for the new "E Ticket" attraction, "Sugar Rush!". Guests will wait in a similar queue with an animatronic Q*Bert at the end of the first room and the Surge Protector checking passengers at the door to the next section of queue. The next portion is a long corridor where the little train would have been to take you in and out of the game. As you get closer, the smells of candy fill the air.

The pre-show area includes several kiosks where you can play mini games related to your upcoming race and how you do indicates how much "Boost" you get for your vehicle as explained by Vanellope.

In the load area (which will have a sign above the load station that flashes "Loading...please wait." as passengers enter their themed cars and your booster levels match what you had earned in the preshow area. As you move into the dark ride section, you go through the training level with Ralph and Venellope, but King Candy/Turbo shows up using its networking capability and saps all of the Boost from your vehicles. As you chase Turbo through the lands of Sugar Rush, you Race alongside him until you are able to make him lose control and refill your boost just in time for you to boost toward the finish line at the Diet Coke mountain while Mentos falls in for an explosive finale.

You exit the attraction through Litwak's Arcade, an arcade/gift shop/restaurant modeled after the one in the movie.

As you go toward the Streets of America, not much has changed here because management wouldn't allow the area that brings in so many people during Christmas for the Osbourne Spectacle of Dancing Lights.

The small Muppets area wouldn't be expanded per say; however, we can re theme the Mamma Melrose eatery to the Muppets. Anyone familiar with the original plan for the area would know that this was going to be Muppet themed complete with a Swedish Chef that occasionally burns down the kitchen.

Going around the corner, we see the Tatooine Traders and Star Tours as normal; however, the entire area from here all the way to the Indiana Jones Stunt Spectacular and the American Idol Experience on the other side of Echo Lake.

In general, the entire area will be patrolled by Storm Troopers, Jedi, Droids, and several other types of entertainment in the streets.

Going along the side of Star Tours we can see the Backlot Express has been redone as the Mos Isley Cantina. In the front is a standard counter service with several booths and a Cantina Band. If you prefer to have the character meal with the Star Wars characters, you can go to the buffet on the inside where the bar looks like the one from the film with animatronic patrons that you cannot get to, but they will interact with you as you get your rotisserie chicken and heat lamped pizza. Since you are paying a premium, of COURSE you are getting a cantina band as well. Every so often a show will happen with lightsaber or blaster duels and the like.

Having replaced the Indiana Jones Epic Stunt Spectacular will be a Speeder Bike attraction where we can zoom through the forest moon of Endor.

Replacing the Sounds Dangerous and American Idol attractions would be an entirely new experience themed around Boba Fett. Set up as if you are fugitives running from the Imperial forces, you enter the Cloud City (using a fake high speed elevator in the preshow) to get to the take off platforms to ship you and your party safely to a Rebellion controlled system. As you get into the transport (roller coaster car), you slowly make your way through the show scenes where you can see your ship in the distance getting prepared for takeoff. Boba Fett's Slave one appears in front of you and the bounty hunter demands that you stop and surrender. "It will only do for a surrender. You're wanted alive or dead," he explains before the transport launches into a chase made possible with projections, on board audio, and several inversions as you race around the darkened city night chased by Fett. The ride ends at a safe house (um...gift shop), as you have narrowly escaped the clutches of the famed bounty hunter.

There you have it! My newly revamped Disney's Hollywood Studios! What do you like? What would you do? If you like any of these ideas, please tell us here, on Facebook, or Twitter!

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74 - Crisis on Infinite Podcasts Pt. 1

2014-10-28T19:04:00.000-05:00

The Broke Nerdcast is BACK with another episode of the Dark Quarter! Join Jason and Wally as they welcome the titular host of Brian Powers vs. The World as they discuss the Avengers: Age of Ultron, Star Wars, and then they all catch Ebola! Er...chat ebola is what we meant.

All that and more on the podcast that had earned seven months of vacation time! AND THEN TOOK IT.

Part 2 of Crisis on Infinite Podcasts can be found on the Brian Powers vs. The World Podcast!

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"The Amazing Spider-man 2" is a Failure and Here's Why

2014-10-06T14:25:00.000-05:00

(For more frequent updates, please consider donating to Wally's computer fund. Thank you)

“The Amazing Spider-man 2” was a mess of a movie.

The movie confounded me with the choices that the film makers were making as this series has pretty much devolved into a series of origin stories without a good story to help keep me engaged. I feel like at this point in the life span of the super-hero movie genre, we would understand that we honestly do not need to hear the back story of every character ever put on screen, especially for characters that we already know. Spider-man is a teen who got bit by a spider and got super powers. I got it, you can move on; however, the movie (I refuse to call it a “film”) keeps trying to dig deeper and deeper into the origin of this character that needs no further introduction.

Marvel’s own “Guardians of the Galaxy,” which prominently featured a talking bi-pedal raccoon and a tree person didn’t delve into the origin of these characters and frankly, we didn’t need to.

Not only do we not need any further information about the “how” of Spider-man, but the movie actively pulls me out of the fantasy by asking me to stretch my ability to suspend disbelief to the breaking point by making every single plot point in that story thread something that was happening by design no matter how impossibly convoluted and convenient.

In order for the movie to work, I am asked to believe that Parker’s father worked for Oscorp and developed a super spider to cure his dying partner. We are also asked to believe that Pete’s dad made the spider only compatible with Parker’s DNA so when the spider bit Pete in the first movie, only he could have had the super heroic reaction it did to Parker. This idea places us firmly on shaky ground because in the first movie, Peter accidentally finds those very specific super-spiders by stumbling into them.
If it sounds confusing and a little dumb to you, don’t worry because it is. In fact, this is only a portion of that overall story arc and it only gets more ridiculous. Aside from that, they still didn’t resolve anything by the end of the second movie.

I’ve only really touched the surface of the “A” story line so far, believe it or not. The movie also has the origin of Elektro as its “B” storyline, which is no less convoluted; however, it found a way to be far less believable. The “C” storyline is where we are introduced to Pete’s boyhood friend Harry Osborne and the origin of the Green Goblin. There is a “D” story line where Pete and his on again/off again girlfriend Gwen Stacy decide to go on again and off again. There is an “E” story that touches on the Rhino’s origins, and finally there is even an “F” storyline where Aunt May is hiding the fact that she is having a career change.
I’m not sure about you, but once we have six different concurrent stories, where four are origin stories, and the only one that was really interesting or engaging is the one you ended – you have a problem.

The stink of ambitious Sony executives is all over this movie and it’s frustrating because it seems like they just have no idea how or why world building works but they want to take a go at it anyway.

My advice to Sony is simple: Make a film with a compelling and well told story first. Once that first step has been completed, sprinkle in the clues and callbacks to past and future movies in the context of that story without distracting from it. This process cannot be rushed as excitement needs to build over time. This type of world building needs to have that lift hill that brings you to the peak and lets you see what may be coming ahead of you, but not at the expense of the overall ride. A launch from zero to sixty miles per hour is a valid way to entertain someone but without the substance and elements that keep the excitement up, no one will want to take the ride again.

Disney Toying With "Guardians of the Galaxy" Disneyland Attraction

2014-09-16T12:20:00.001-05:00

Twitter user @DLThings posted an image from a guest survey sent out by Disneyland. The image listed several Marvel properties and requested the one you most want to see in the park. It also allows you to write in a pick if you decide Blade should be in a Disney park for whatever reason.

Which do you want to see?

"Just Desserts"

2014-07-22T20:37:00.002-05:00

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"Skills"

2014-07-14T21:42:00.000-05:00

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"Balance"

2014-07-07T21:13:00.000-05:00

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"Rock Simulator"

2014-06-30T16:44:00.000-05:00

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73 - Recording Live from the Can

2014-05-06T14:37:00.002-05:00

Finally the Broke Nerds come back to talk their particular brand of nonsense.

Jason and Wally talk about what has kept them from the mic.

Once they get that nonsense out of the way, they discuss the stuff you really want to hear; like potty training, poor equipment, and - I guess Star Wars. Whatever.

Thank you for your patience and enjoy the new and awesome Dark Quarter Podcast!

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Keys to the Kingdom Part Three: Disney's Animal Kingdom

2014-05-02T08:55:00.000-05:00

In parts one and two of the Keys to the Kingdom series, I had a good bit to say about what I would do to improve the parks in ways that I would enjoy seeing and this entry will be no different.

Animal Kingdom has always been my least favorite park in Walt Disney World and there are several reasons. Not that the park is bad, but the walk ways are cramped despite being the largest park, and there are fewer things to do that are worth doing than the other parks. In fact the best attractions are ones that some people pass up because you have to walk through them and people would ask, "Why would I want to walk for fun at this point?"

With that said, it is a gorgeous park with the Asia and Africa areas being the finest examples of theme park theming I have ever had the pleasure of viewing.

The biggest issue with this park is how inconsistent the quality is, frankly. Africa and Asia are pitch perfect except for the Yeti needing fixed in Expedition Everest. Even though having the Yeti fixed means the end of "Disco Yeti", this is absolutely one of the things that need to happen.

We also need to replace the dragon with the Yeti. Why is that even there anymore?

The only area that I have any issue with (until Avatarland opens) is Dinoland and the surrounding areas. I understand what the Imagineers were going for, I really do; however, I do not believe that the area should exist just for the sake of the story that they are claiming need to be told.

Now this is where YOU come in.

I have two different ideas with what to do with this area. I will give you the chance to tell me which one you like or whether there are other things you would do to improve the area.

OPTION ONE:

Bulldoze the area and take the track to Dinosaur to the MK for the Indiana Jones attraction I proposed. Once we've successfully cleansed the area of all terribleness, we could go forward with Dinosaur theme again, but instead of a dig site, we are time travelers who have been sent to the past. Similar to the other walk ways, we could have different exhibits for the different dinosaurs as if they were living and breathing creatures with the cast members there to describe what life is like for these animals.

The whole thing culminates with a Tyrannosaurus Encounter attraction where we are taken to the Rex exhibit only for something terrible to happen and we are chased by a pack of T-Rexes as we flee to safety.

OPTION TWO:

Bulldoze the area and take the track to Dinosaur to the MK for the Indiana Jones attraction I proposed. Once we've successfully cleansed the area of all terribleness, we could go forward with a complete redesign.

The Finding Nemo musical is an extremely popular part of Dinoland and it has no business being there, so it would make far more sense to change the entire area to match the other sections and make it Australia.

There are enough ideas and unique animals that you could put in an Australian portion of the park that I'm certain that many people have had the same idea. Of course, since this is my blog, I should probably whip something up.

My idea would be to relocate the Seas type attraction to the park, but knowing the extreme difficulty of something like that, the Nemo musical may be the only mention of Australia's nautical wildlife.

Further in the area, we are able to tour the Walkabout Trails that will be similar to the other walking trail areas of the park. In the trails we find ourselves experiencing kangaroos, wallabys, koalas, and many of the creepy crawly things that want to kill everyone that Australia is famous for. You know? Family fun.

Pictured: Family Fun

At the end of the park, we find the Outback Outfitters shop and either Crush's Coaster or an entirely new experience that focuses on the beauty of the Australian Outback.

With that, we exit the Animal Kingdom for now. Which option do you prefer?

Join me again when I tackle my biggest project yet: The Disney Hollywood Studios where we will experience Queen Elsa's powers, the Force, and race for the finish line (literally) with a new area that might have a few glitches.

Don't forget to listen to the latest Dark Quarter Podcast!

Goodnight Bob Hoskins

2014-04-30T09:00:00.001-05:00

When I was seven years old, Eddie Valiant was a real person and Bob Hoskins didn't exist. That is the kind of silly thing that goes through a child's mind when they watch a movie that lays an imprint on you where it is the first time you ever encounter an actor who does such a good job that the world created on screen, no matter how ridiculous, is taken for fact.

I knew "Who Framed Roger Rabbit?" was only a movie, but Hoskins brought an honesty and realism to the world that still resonates to this day and is one of the most overlooked comedic performances in film.

Today, Mr. Hoskins' agent confirmed that the actor had passed away from pneumonia while surrounded by family and friends.

Hoskins had retired from acting, but his filmography will live on. Even if the movie wasn't good, he could be counted on to deliver the best performance in the film.

He will be missed.

Keys to the Kingdom Part Two: EPCOT

2014-04-25T15:07:00.000-05:00

Let's get this out of the way early: For entirely nostalgic reasons, Epcot is my favorite park at Walt Disney World. There is a sense of wonder that I get that spurs my creativity as I enter the gates.

The main issue to address is the that Epcot has really changed the focus of Future World. What used to be a glimpse of what technology has brought to our present along with a peek at what may be coming in our near future had become a vaguely futuristic look at how awesome our thrill rides are.

FUTURE WORLD:

So let's enter the part where the first change will be extremely evident: Leave A Legacy will be moved or removed.

I know that there is some sort of time based agreement that buying a Leave A Legacy tile (a stamp sized metal portrait Disney sold to guests) will guarantee that the tile will be present for a certain length of time. as such, I would move them to a walkway or somewhere that it isn't blocking the view of Spaceship Earth.

Pictured - Spaceship Earth and the grave markers for people who call it "The Big Golfball"

In the place of these giant eye sores, I would have either nothing or a tasteful sign or something. Anything but the Leave A Legacy stuff.

As we move straight ahead, we hit Spaceship Earth, which would have the final third redone as the interactive elements are fun, but the descent tunnel needs something to look at.

Continuing to go behind Spaceship Earth is the Innoventions area and it needs a little something more considering that it is just a mish mash of different companies advertising their wares. This has always been kind of a problem area ever since it came about in the 90's, but it just seems like a job fair in there now.

Since Future World has left its former mission statement behind, maybe we can convert Innoventions into a One Man's Dream type attraction with the focus on the ever changing landscape of Epcot. Models, movies, and demonstrations along with exhibits about defunct attractions would make this an Epcot fan's favorite area and it would give the company an excuse to sell Epcot Center retro merchandise that I love to buy.

To the left, is the Universe of Energy with Ellen and it is remarkably outdated. Since Ellen is involved, it stays pretty popular; however, from the moment she pulls out her enormous cell phone, the entire things falls apart. Combine this with the knowledge that technology has changed the way energy is produced and her and guest stars Bill Nye and Jamie Lee Curtis are all looking much older nowadays, this show either needs to be replaced or revamped. Though, having Nye and Ellen involved with whatever replaces it would be great. I would also accept either of them being replaced by Neil deGrasse Tyson or at least have him join in.

As we continue right next door to the The Universe of Energy, tucked away behind the bushes is the former location of the Wonders of Life Pavilion. Currently the space is used for special events and at this point, I think that this would be the best use of the space. In fact, I would have the construction crews come in to specifically make it into a more permanent showcase space. As an alternative, there is always my Portal idea, but I've fallen out of love with that idea.

Next up, Mission: Space would get a nice little retheme with the help of Neil deGrasse Tyson, who replaces Gary Sinese as our guide to the attraction. Once on the attraction, the ride video should be updated to the latest in special effects and single screen 3D technology. The post show will have single screen 3D that will have "windows" along the walls to show that we are in a space station as Tyson walks us through interactive exhibits. To go back to Earth, we walk through a Portal Door that instantly transmits us home. Too bad the technology to go INTO space with a portal does not exist yet.

Test Track 2.0 will remain the same since it has become pretty awesome.

Now, we go back around to the other side of Future World.

The Seas With Nemo and Friends needs a new aquarium and as such, they need to do that. I understand that it may close the attraction, but those fish deserve better.

As we enter The Land Pavilion, not much changes, but the film on Soarin' could is updated with 10K projection and possibly 3D.

Continuing on, we enter Journey Into Imagination with Figment.

What is currently playing in this area is not that great, but it isn't terrible; however, I think it should be restored to the closest approximation of what the original JII was and that included adding the Dreamfinder back into the attraction. I understand that the reason that they really can't is because the turn table the initial scene was built into is kind of welded shut.

I think I found a way.

Having to close up the pavilion for an extended time, this would be a complete overhaul of the building and the attraction.

Coming into the attraction, you would collect your steam punk inspired "imagination goggles" (which are just 3D glasses) and climb aboard the newly updated cars that work similarly to the ones in the Spider-man attraction in Universal. The design of the cars would be very steam punk inspired as well as we go into the first scene.

The opening will be nearly exactly like the original Journey attraction that closed in 1998, except done with entirely new and updated technology. We get a 3D projection screen of the Dreamfinder and his blimp in the clouds. Clouds seem to fill the room and the vehicles sway as if floating on air as he introduces himself and the ideas of imagination eventually introducing us to his creation, Figment. Figment flies about the room as they gain inspiration until the "idea bag" is full and we must go empty it in the subsequent scenes. What follows is a wild and whimsical 4D journey of sight and sound as we fly through the pages of books, paint a room by pointing at surfaces, as well as other unpredictable scenarios that climax with the riders having to escape the horror section with the help of Figment and the Dreamfinder.

Once safe, you exit through a gift shop/playground where imagination runs wild!

Next door to the attraction is currently Captain EO; however, I think it would be best served as a preview center for the entire Disney company. 3D technology in general is an every day occurrence in today's day and age and an air conditioned theater that is showing only upcoming attractions and would be a great addition to an Imagination Pavilion. Perhaps even calling it the EO Theater would be a nice nod to the currently running...severely outdated attraction.

WORLD SHOWCASE:

To be honest, one of the best areas of any theme park is Epcot's World Showcase. It has everything you could possibly want including culturally diverse cast members that represent their individual countries, unique dining opportunities, and even bucket loads of alcoholic beverages.

There is some upkeep that needs to be done, especially in the Norway Pavilion, but this is an area of the park that could only be improved with the addition of more countries.

Without going into details about what they would entail, I humbly suggest the following: Australia, New Zealand, United Arab Emirates, Brazil, and anywhere that has good food that I may have left out.

Finally, Illuminations needs an update. I will leave it at that.

Next time, we delve into the Animal Kingdom for what should be the shortest entry in the series. Until then, don't forget to share, comment with your ideas and country additions, and listen to our podcast!

Thanks for reading!

Keys to the Kingdom Part One: Magic Kingdom

2014-04-18T09:18:00.001-05:00

Have you ever sat down with friends or loved ones where you spent the imaginary money that you had as a result of a future lottery winning that likely will never happen? I love to do that kind of thing because for a brief moment in time, I can live like a millionaire in my gorgeous mansion in Orlando, surrounded by my loved ones in smaller houses as I go to the grocery store in my Delorean.

Much like those flights of lottery fancy, I always enjoy coming up with additions and policies that I would institute if I were in charge of Disney Parks. This is not only because they are cool, but because I think Disney would make a ton of money off of these ideas and I truly hope that they steal them.

I think we should really begin with the park that needs little introduction, the Magic Kingdom. Of course this means that I am going to introduce it anyway.

The Magic Kingdom is the park that people think about when people say Walt Disney World. Luckily, it doesn't really need too much work. The park is currently (as of April 2014) undergoing a refresh around the Hub to allow for better traffic flow as well as the addition of viewing areas for the fireworks. The Seven Dwarfs Mine Train will be opeining as the final stage of the New Fantasyland expansion that also included the hit Little Mermaid dark ride, the Be Our Guest resturaunt, and a few other nice bits. So what is there that can be done? Let's take this on a land by land basis so that you can better visualize what I would do.

Main Street:
Main Street needs very little in the way of changes cosmetically. In fact, the only real changes I would make in the area would be a refresh of the Tony's Townsquare Resturaunt and the merchandising.

Tony's is too cramped and the food is worse than an Olive Garden knock off. I would just get rid of the current menu (which I assume was written in crayon at the time they were originally written) and raise prices to make it more of a signature dining experience. Again, that only works if the food is good. Maybe we can get Chef Joe from MasterChef to do something with it. Of course that would be wishful thinking.

As we walk further down Main Street, the stores are all basically selling the same stuff that you can buy anywhere else in WDW. I think it would be a good idea to have at least a few items that are specifically for main street. T-shirts, hats, and even Dapper Dan merchandise would be nice.

Adventureland:
As we continue to move from Main Street and go clockwise to Adventureland, we cross over the bridge to discover the biggest change I would make to the Magic Kingdom.

The first thing you will notice is that Tinkerbell's Magical Nook (teehee) will be replaced by a meet and greet with Aladdin, Jasmine, Abu, and the Genie allowing me to relocate the nook in another park (I will discuss specifics in a future installment). You and your family will be making the procession to congratulate Al and his new bride at their wedding.

As you move past the Aloha Isle and smoking area, you will find yourself with multiple paths you can take. Two of the paths will guide you through a series of shops and highly themed areas that look like a Middle Eastern market similar to what is located in the Morocco pavilion in EPCOT. (Yes, I know Morocco is in Africa)

Morocco Pavilion

The shopping area is like a maze and will give you the feel of being in an exotic country and will sell a selection of Indiana Jones merchandise. The area will completely replace the FLYING CARPETS OF ALADDIN attraction and will culminate with an Indiana Jones face character meet and greet opportunity.

Set up to be as if Marshall College, employer of Dr. Jones, is trying to get alumnus to donate money to the archaeology department by sending the world famous explorer on tour to shake babies and kiss hands.

The location of the meet and greet as well as the merch will make sense considering that the third path that leads straight ahead(accessible from the shops as well) will be INDIANA JONES AND THE TEMPLE OF THE FORBIDDEN EYE or similar attraction where the SWISS FAMILY TREEHOUSE is currently located. Travelling past these locations will bring you past some areas that will not be touched including THE JUNGLE CRUISE, THE ENCHANTED TIKI ROOM, and PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN though the latter of which needs a severe refresh to fix the effects.

The PIRATE TUTORIAL will continue on in this area and Tortuga Tavern will be converted into a sit down restaurant with two character meal experiences. Breakfast will have the characters of Jake and the Neverland Pirates as they serve breakfast burritos (as suggested by Barbara Phelps) and the like and dinner will have Jack Sparrow to hob nob with guests as he looks for new crew members.

Frontierland:
Frankly, Frontierland is almost pitch perfect. The only thing here would be to ensure the effects on SPLASH MOUNTAIN keep working (often they don't) and add the Disneyland effects to BIG THUNDER MOUNTAIN RAILROAD.

Liberty Square:
Liberty Square is also pretty perfect. The only thing I can think of is to add whoever our next president is to the HALL OF PRESIDENTS.

Fantasyland:
Eff you Fantasyland! You've had enough TLC, dagnabbit!

Tomorrowland:
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but Tomorrowland is a mess.

What does the "Tomorrow" in Tomorrowland even mean anymore, really? Not much of anything if you ask me. There isn't one aspect of the attractions located here that make me think of the Future as was the original intent of this land.

The good news about the land is that there really isn't too much that I can really do to it. I think the attractions located there are ok, but it is such a mismatched group of properties in there. It really is more of a sci-fi version of Fantasyland without the cohesiveness.

Any changes that I would do would be mostly cosmetic. Just drop some paint here and there, make sure the effects are working on all of the shows and what not. The only content change in the area would be to improve two of the attractions that are already there.

In the back of the area is the CAROUSEL OF PROGRESS, a fifty year old attraction with a finale that predicts a future that is about twenty years past. I say that the final scene should be overhauled to either the original as an homage, or change it to a new future and enter into the budget to update it again in another ten years.

The other attraction I would overhaul is STITCH'S GREAT ESCAPE. I really hate this attraction, but only because it seems to be effects based for the sake of effects. If I can just get the Imagineers to remove the chilli dog scene, it will be a major victory.

Aside from updating the fireworks and finding a replacement for the MAIN STREET ELECTRICAL PARADE, these are the major changes that I would make to the Magic Kingdom if I was the one in charge. Next time, I will take on what used to be a park of discovery: EPCOT. Until then, share this with those who would appreciate this type of thing and don't forget to comment and tell me what you like and dislike about my ideas. Don't be afraid to comment with what you would do instead because I love to hear new ideas!

Don't forget to listen to our show!

72 - Raiders! The Chris Strompolos Interview!

2014-02-24T22:03:00.000-06:00

Join Jason and Wally as they interview one of the creative forces behind the Raiders of the Lost Ark Adaptation! Listen as Chris explains why three kids from South Mississippi would want to produce a shot by shot reproduction of the great Spielberg movie before there was even a YouTube to upload it to! Then find out how you can find out more in the book “Raiders, The Story of the Greatest Fan Film Ever Made by Alan Eisenstock” and how you can make fan film history by giving to the Kickstarter to help film the missing airplane scene!

Then the Quarterwits give a heartfelt goodbye to the comedy legend, Harold Ramis.

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71 - The Dark Quarter Rises

2014-02-01T22:22:00.000-06:00

On this; the first Dark Quarter podcast, The Broke Nerdcast crew explains the history of The Dark Quarter and what it means to them. Then the Quarterwits give their short reviews of The Hobbit: Desolation of Smaug, Frozen, Saving Mr. Banks, and Breaking Bad. They then talk about a Disney Afternoon cartoon getting the live action treatment, bones cracking on the Star Wars set, and Alfred murdering puppies.

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70 - Felina

2013-12-16T20:46:00.000-06:00

On the very last episode of The Broke Nerdcast* Jason and Wally say goodbye in style!

Jason discusses the great new sci-fi show "Almost Human" and MST3K's role as inspiration as he draws up some business. Wally explains the difficulty in adapting a screenplay into a television pilot as well as his adventures suiting up as the Batman!

Then they delve into Wonder Woman, Godzilla, Spider-man, and much more!

*Results not typical.

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69 - Rise of the Deshipdecons

2013-12-04T20:57:00.000-06:00

The buzzing sound of terror screams through the night as a new threat faces humanity from the evil Deshipdecons!

Jason, Wally, and Elaine must face their toughest challenge yet as they battle the ever-smiling menace of the Amazon Prime Air droids, insane crowds of people, and an unexpected series of events that could rip apart the very fabric of society!

Also dirty jokes.