The Chronicles of Mustang Sally

Let's Rally for a Cause!

2013-03-05T18:27:00.000-08:00

Let’s Rally for a Cause!

In a way, CJ Pony Parts Rally Dixie 2012 started in Charleston, SC at the commencement of Rally Appalachia 2011. As yet unnamed and the route not planned and no resolutions made, many of the participants of 2011 had already made the commitment to Rally North America to be a part of something that was bigger than they are individually; the ability to come together collectively and raise money and promote a charity and have fun all at the same time.

Scott, Karen and Tony

The two mad-men geniuses’ behind Rally North America are Tony Intrieri and Scott Spielman who, along with a few, now veteran, rally teams conjured up the idea of rallying for a cause. While creating and organizing a rally is not uncommon or unusual, what is extraordinary about RNA’s mission, vision and values is that they want the everyday man; the common man to participate in a fundraising opportunity and rally. Collectively, Rally Dixie 2012 has raised in excess of $48,000 for the Accelerated Cure Project for Multiple Sclerosis .

In order to make the rally something that is affordable and manageable for the participants, Tony and Scott pick a summer date which is always in the middle of the week for better negotiated hotel rates. There is a ‘pre-rally meeting’ held the night before day one of the rally where the outline the rules of the rally and the individuals who will be helpers during the rally. These teams are rally participants who pay the very nominal entry fee, book and pay for their own hotels and solicit donations like the rest of the teams. However these helper teams forgo any chance of winning any day of the rally to help Tony and Scott to make all three days a success. Making the pre-rally meeting even more interesting, the RNA team were able to get item donations from some of the sponsors for an auction to raise more money. There were some pretty awesome items; a Monster racing helmet, a RC Ken Block Ford Fiesta, two battery jump packs, Jungle hats, one of which was worn by Woodie Harrelson in Zombieland, and a multitude of additional stuff donated by Monster, Brannon Auto Parts, Autogeek.com and generous individuals. The auction raised an additional $1,790.00. Not bad for a bunch of motorheads!

The most important aspect of the pre-rally meeting are the rules, and they are pretty simple; no tickets from law enforcement, if you get a ticket on any day of the rally you will be automatically disqualified; obey all traffic rules and take pictures of you and the co-driver at all of the checkpoints and make sure the picture is time and date stamped. If you get to the finish line too fast and have all of the checkpoints, well, the powers that be know you were speeding. This is not, by any means, a ‘Cannonball Run’ type of car event will which do nothing but attract trouble and make locals angry.

In Rally Appalachia 2011 there were no speeding tickets. Rally Dixie 2012 there was a speeding ticket, Team Legacy. They were successful on the first day and came in second place. What was not revealed until the end of rally awards was that they were pulled over and were issued a speeding ticket on day three. This team were total sportsmen because they revealed that they had gotten a speeding ticket and chose to disqualify themselves.

What we have to keep reminding ourselves when we are, in the most literal sense of the word, representing Rally North America, the charitable cause, your state, and the car you drive. No matter where you travel in country or in the world, you are always ambassador and representing something. Being a suitable representative of Rally North America and the causes that are chosen on a yearly basis is one of the most important aspects of the rally.

As participants of the rally, we are always thrilled to know that the charity for whom you are soliciting donations and telling anyone who will listen is grateful and delighted with the monies raised. Karen Crumback is the Development Director for the Accelerated Cure Project, headquartered in Waltham, MA and joined us for the first two days of the rally. We could tell how delighted she was with the fund raising effort. She jokingly said that she went to a few stores to look for pom-poms to have at the start line the next day. She didn’t need them, she was bubbling with excitement and energy and her enthusiasm was infectious. Karen also explained how the Accelerated cure project functioned.

Nobelsvilles Finest

The Accelerated Cure Project is a repository for DNA and Blood samples donated by people who are affected by Multiple Sclerosis. The repository gets requests from scientists grouping of samples specified by parameters that they specify. The ACP will send the samples and in return, the results from the independent research are shared with the ACP to create a larger base of knowledge and information, in essence, adding pieces to the Multiple Sclerosis puzzle. Currently, there are only treatment options; however the ultimate goal is to find a cure for MS.

Strip away the periphery and the core of this rally is 80 cars; everything from a Smart Car to a Dodge Viper GTS, 160 participants, coming from 28 States and 3 providences of Canada, converging on the small town of Nobelsville, IN., all coming prepared with coolers, drinks, snacks, GPS units suctioned to the dashes, electronic tablets, maps, atlases and tour books to run an unknown route. Find the places given handed to each car at the start line every day, get there take a picture and find the next checkpoint. Inevitably, along the way, people will stop you and say “What are your guys doing?” or “I’ve seen all of these cars with stickers on them come through town, what’s this all about?” This becomes an opportunity to talk about and promote the cause and point them to the web site for a donation.

Day 1 in Nobelsville, IN

The ACP was started in 2000 by Art Mellor after he was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis through a series of MRI’s and blood work. Art was not a doctor or a researcher, however he decided to leave his start-up company and, through his entrepreneurialism and a proactive approach to the disease he launched the Boston Cure Project. In 2005 the company expanded and was given a more formal name of the Accelerated Cure for Multiple Sclerosis.

Because the charity was announced by RNA almost eight months before the rally, the participant had many months to talk about and actively promote the charity and solicit donations. What is more incredible than raising $48,000, is the more you talk to people, the more you hear the stories about individuals who have been diagnosed with MS. They will say, ‘Yes, my mom was diagnosed.’, ‘My best friends dad has lived with it for years.’ or ‘I have it.’ It seems that there is someone in their lives that are affected by the disease.

This cause and charity hit especially close to home for one of the veteran rally couples; Greg & Kim Rada who own Dermal Additions. Kim’s mom was diagnosed when she was a senior in high school so when they heard about this years’ charity they decided to be a sponsor of the rally. The decals on their Charger were stunning and beautiful, but the most touching decal simply read ‘for mom’, whose life was permanently changed by the diagnosis, was placed inconspicuously in the right rear spoiler of the Charger.

Team Struck at the drag strip

Win by a nose - a wins a win

Because this rally is an incredible diverse group of people, there are essentially three different types of participants. The competitors who are in it to win it, either by garnering the most donations, or getting the best time on any of the three days. The second group are the teams that want to make all of the checkpoints, no matter how long it takes, and enjoy the scenery and history of the area along the way. And then there are the people who are there for the tracks. This year, we were so lucky to visit three very different types of tracks. Day one was a figure eight track. Not everyone participated, but those who did take a few crazy 8 laps said it was wild. The teams were not penalized for taking a few extra laps, but as soon as you took one pass you received checkpoint card , and you were on the clock. Day two was a drag strip and just about everyone wanted to play, including the Toyota Prius against the retired Crown Victoria police cruiser, complete with the push bar, lights, sirens and PA system. Amazingly, they were pretty equally matched. Of course, the Mustangs, the GTO’s and Team Struck, the Ford Lightning had to play. And play they did; some teams took 4 or more runs down the track. Throughout the rally Team Riff Raff and Team Stangy ran together, and the drag strip was no exception. As #111 and #26 Staged, with adrenaline coursing, pre-stage, stage, yellow, yellow, yellow, green – GO!

Team Limer, Stangy and Riff Raff

Accelerate through the gears, keep a straight line and be amazed at how rapidly you come up on the finish line. Then it’s over. ‘That was awesome!’ As number 26 pulled long side, he said ‘Let’s do it again!’ The last track that we had the privilege to drive our cars on was Talladega Super Speedway in Lincoln, Alabama. Yes, that “Talladega” race track. If you were able to go fast enough, you almost didn’t have to turn the steering wheel to the right to go left. There were some simple rules on the track; no hanging back, no passing and keep up with the pace vehicle. No problem and thank you for the rollercoaster ride that I could never buy.

The participants who do the rally to see the sights and tour the countryside were not disappointed this year. Covered bridges in Indiana, The National Corvette Museum and Churchill Downs in Kentucky, the Jack Daniels Distillery and the most quaint ‘old town’ of Lexington Kentucky, Little River Preserve in Fort Payne with its scenic outlooks and stunning falls in Alabama, a slice of history in old Alabama Town in Montgomery and finally the beautiful Gulf of Mexico in Fort Walton Beach.

On the last day of the rally, at the finish line the awards ceremony begins. The winners from each day, the best costume award, the hard luck award, the Long distance award, and the spirit of the rally award are named . The daily winners did an exceptional job in getting all of the check points and not getting lost or making any wrong turns.

Fort Walton Beach, FL

One of the most interesting and fun awards was the Best Costume or Themed Entry. Honorably mentioned was Team Raptor Pursuit with Jeff & Gail Rushing in their ‘10 Ford Raptor 4X4. Their costumes were complete with safari outfits, remote control raptor trucks tiny inflatable raptors in the tiny truck beds and the best was the inflatable raptor in the cage in the bed of the Raptor. The winners of the Best Costume award were Team Cream 5.0, Troy Kirchmar & Phil Marchini in a retired Ford Crown Vic Police vehicle. They walked the walk and talked the talk all three days by dressing as two Lieutenant Dangles from Reno 911, complete with police uniforms, equipment belts and fuzzy handcuffs. They did break from the Reno 911 and showed up as Hawaii 5-0 on day two. When they were not directing traffic in what can only be described as “ the most Flamboyant Hip Swinging officers ever” they were making arrests including Gumby and his horse, most of the flag girls from the rally as well as anyone else who actually believed they were officers.

The 'barn find'

HARD Luck Award is an award that no one really strives to win. By ‘winning’ this award, it means that you lived three really hard days filled with problem solving and “I hope this works…”. The winning team was Team FireChicken - Thomas Diley & Jeffery Peterson in their vintage 1979 Pontiac Firebird. The Exhaust fell off twice, carburetor float stuck, the headliner was falling down (but that’s just what happens in vintage American cars), pervasive cat pee smell (thank you T-Tops!), multiple times running out of gas, leaking everything, constant over-heating and, oh, yeah - catching fire. Thankfully, they thought a at least a little bit ahead and had Nicholas Zuber in a mid 90’s Chevy S-10 as their chase car & pit crew. Good job men, as members of the US Military you made it through Afghanistan and as drivers Through CJ Pony Parts Rally Dixie 2012 in a ‘barn find’ Firebird.

The Honorable Mention for the Hard Luck Award went to Carl Bowen and Team CCR Racing for having the resourcefulness to run a Mustang DRAG CAR from Michigan to Florida. He had a hard start all three days, ran out of gas multiple times and still made it to the rally awards. When Tony asked him what the miles per gallon he gets with it, he said, “Its miles per gas can, and I’m not sure.”

The 'honorable mention' winner of the Hard Luck Award

Long Distance Award Winner was Team G60, Jon Dow & Kyle Story in Johns 1991 VW Corrado, driving all the way from Maine for a total of 3865 Miles.

As was mentioned earlier, Brian Shannon and Team T.U.N.A were Spirit of the Rally Winners for staging all the Teams at the race track events and working on Rally Sponsors throughout the year leading up to the rally.

Capital City GTO also volunteered to do the registration and making it super simple for all of the participants, and Dale Clough kept the teams updated and handled Rally items whenever called upon. These guys really stepped up and helped out Tony and Scott but also by doing so, they ultimately helped out the entire rally.

Daily winners are as follows:

Day 1
1st Place - Team Bacon B8 - Kyle & Micheala Watson - BMW M3
2nd Place - Team Angry Goat - Terry Barnett & Rick Morrison - 06 Pontiac GTO
3rd Place - Team Stinky - Aaron & Jessica Batey - 09 VW GTI

Day 2
1st Place - Team Megaforce Rally - Ed Shulman & Jim Price - 2011 Subaru WRX STI Limited
2nd Place - Team eff Yeah - Mike Andrews & Dustin Kaufman - 05 Pontaic GTO
3rd Place - Team LS WON - Topgun Justin Robinson & David Coykendall - 99 Chevy Corvette

Day 3
1st Place - Team TDI - Tim & Chris Ealer - 2011 VW Golf TDI
2nd Place - Team Hoppes Alan Sr & Alan Hoppes Jr - 1986 Porsche 944
3rd Place - Teams Most Impressive - Jon Bowen, Aaron Jonston, Dan Carpenter, Matt Bercik - 10 Dodge Challenger & 08 BMW M6

As a second year participant, it’s easy to understand how this adventure becomes something that is full of unknowns and roads less travelled, literally and figuratively. It becomes a task that is rooted in love, the spirit of giving and fun, with some trying times and many memorable times wrapped up and stuffed in your car.

Until next year, Rally Fans...

Ford Nationals at Carlisle

2012-06-03T19:04:00.000-07:00

Old license plates

Mercury Comet 'Gasser'

Edsel

Car overload at Carlisle

2012-06-03T18:50:00.000-07:00

Greyhound emblem

Radiator Temperature hood emblem

Cobra

Barney Feif replicated police car

Fairlane Skyliner

One Down, Two To Go.

2011-07-19T19:22:00.000-07:00

Full day one of the Rally Appalachia and I am wiped out. This stuff is totally intense! Never in my life did I think that I would spend 8 hours and 350 miles, driving here and there, finding checkpoints and taking pictures all in the name of fun and fundraising. We burned a tank of gas and did not leave the Commonwealth of Virginia. Then, at the end of the day we all get together and talk about the checkpoints, what we could have done differently and how we could have shaved time off here and there.

Just in the first day, there have been reports of getting pulled over, break downs and many, many miles of “wait, that was it back there, turn around, turn around!!” I don’t have the full report, but I think we all made it to relatively Natural Bridge intact and we all managed to stay out of trouble on Skyline drive.

We were told time and time again in the pre-rally meeting, that there will be speeding, no speeding, NO SPEEDING! Clear?? If you are caught speeding on the Blue Ridge Parkway or Skyline Drive, there is a possibility that you and the entire rally will be kicked off the Parkway and Skyline. Somewhere from the back of the conference room that we are all packed into someone says ‘Don’t Be That Guy’. Brilliant; exactly. Dude, don’t be that guy! And thankfully, today there was no “That guy” on

Skyline Drive

today.

Finding the checkpoints and watching for the other rally cars really made you concentrate, which is exhausting. From 8:30, when we pulled chocks in Winchester to coming down the hill into Natural Bridge at 4:30, was eight full hours of what’s the next checkpoint? What’s the speed limit? When is my next turn? Left, no right, no it’s right there!! Stop, take a picture, get in the car, get on the road and hope that your navigator knows where the next turn/ stop/ checkpoint is. Then watching for the teams; there goes Team Bentley, there goes Team CJ’s (he won the first day – Right on Mr. Cobra!!), we just passed one of the Capitol City GTO’s. Then your mind starts to wander…”were they ahead of us or behind us?? Did they get the next checkpoint, or are they lost??”

We (mostly) all made it, from the first three to the hotel tonight, with a time separation of 51 seconds between the first and second, to Team RamRod; without any tickets or accidents, we completed day one. Lets do it again tomorrow!

Rally North America Appalahia 2011

2011-07-04T07:18:00.000-07:00

We are off on another adventure with the Mustang and we are so very excited about it. In December 2010 Tommy was on the CJ Pony Parts website http://www.cjponyparts.com/Default.aspx and saw an promotion for the Rally North America Appalachia 2011 in July http://www.rallynorthamerica.com/. He asked if I thought that we should do it and of course I said "Yes!!". However, by the time we realized that there were only 80 cars allowed to be registered, all of the slots were full. Boo... Hiss..

So fast forward to April of 2011. Tommy is out at CJ Pony Parts in the Harrisburg area and there sits two, yes two, Mustangs that CJ's was sponsoring for the Rally. So he comes home and mentions this in passing, to me. The wheels began to churn in my head. The next day, I went onto the RNA web site and saw the standby form. What the heck I'm going to submit a standby form to be a part of the rally; why not.

A week later, I get an e-mail from Tony, one of the organizers (genius masterminds) of Rally North America. It simply read "There are two openings for the rally. Please call me with any questions before you decide you want to commit to the rally."

This is actually a rally that is benefiting the Intrepid Fallen Heroes Fund http://www.fallenheroesfund.org/About-IFHF.aspx. All of the donations went directly to the web site, they were not filtered through the RNA web site and administrators, so you know that the charitable organization is getting the entire donation. Its a good feeling.

Back to getting into the rally. Each registered car has a driver and a navigator. There are teams of best friends, co-workers, husbands and wives and families. The cars participating are everything from a Mazda Miata and a BMW Z4 to an Audi A4 Wagon and a Firebird. Everything from soup to nuts in the car world.

After I received the e-mail from Tony, I called Tommy in an excited frantic panic. "Do you still want to do the rally in July????" All he said was 'Well, Yeah.' At that point I felt as though I had won the lottery, I was so excited. I know, you may be saying to yourself - this is what would make you happy beyond words??? Yes, yes, it would. There are a few times in ones' life that you throw caution to the wind and do something without picking apart the ins and outs and worrying about the what ifs. You just make it happen- and that's what we are going to do.

So the Rally is in July; 18th to the 22nd. We start in Winchester VA with a meeting about the course and the always required waiver. Then the next day, on to Natural Bridge, VA. If you've never been there, please take a day and go, its absolutely stunning and amazing. Not only because it is what it says it is, but also because none of it was ever engineered by man. Only the course of evolution has made the beauty that you will see. http://www.naturalbridgeva.com/

Greenville will be our next stop, then finally ending in Charleston, SC. This is a city that I will name the most beautiful on the east coast. Not for the people, as Miami is always named, but because of the historical significance and the beauty of the city and landscape. Please spend some time there; if you do, you will love it as much as we do.

Along the way the rally teams will be required to stop at various checkpoints, document yourself there with a date stamped picture and proceed to the next checkpoint. Oh, did I mention that we are going to TWO race tracks and a drag way?? Yeah, this girl is beyond excited to go roundy round on the race track and to see what my reaction time is like.

Next up - Decals and tires. Until then happy and safe driving!

The summer is fast dissappearing...

2010-08-22T13:23:00.000-07:00

Two of my favorites - Tommy and South Carolina beaches.

Summer, the time of rest and relaxation. Not really, only if you are a kid, I suppose. Its already more than half way through August and I am trying to figure out what happened to June and July. In May we went to Myrtle Beach and Georgetown, SC. Then we get back and its August. Enough of that.

Update on the Mustangs... Yes, I said '-s'. Tommy acquired a 1966 Mustang in 1999, well before I came in the picture. This unit, as I will call it, was parked at his parents house while he was in college. He worked on it, but it needed so much work, that it became overwhelming. Not only was it parked for at least 4 years before it was purchased by the The Tommy, but it had rust in the cowl panel, on the floor pan and collision damage at the passenger rear panel. When his parents moved he moved to to a friends house and it stayed there for about 3 years. When Todd and his wife bought another house, we moved it to the driveway. Yes, the driveway, under a blue tarp. Charming, I know. I think that may be one of the reasons that the neighbor across the street can't sell... Maybe not.

At any rate, its under the blue tarp and it is getting love, when its not raining, as it is today. Its current state is: a together motor and trans, no interior - at all, no rear end, that's on Tommy's bench at work, no glass (we have all of the original glass) and no wiring harness (we have one, just has to be installed). Needless to say, its apart and going back together, slowly. Its going to be awesome when its done.

The red 09 Mustang is still awesome... I love it more and more every time I drive it. Tommy installed hood pins on it, that front part of the hood, as it hangs over the grill is like a sail. Its just catches the wind and tries to pull up on the hood. He also installed an X pipe and 3:73 gears. He especially likes the gears because he doesn't have to work that hard to make the tires chirp. Fun!

We took the 09 to Myrle Beach, that was totally fun. Uncle Robert was in love with it and said that he had always wanted a red convertible. He has a red convertible, but its a Toyota Solara...

Soon we will be departing for the Shenandoah National park in Luray Virginia. I will update with pictures and maybe a funny story.

Until then, safe and happy driving!

Gracie, the black Brown Rat Killer and additional things happening

2010-01-01T18:32:00.000-08:00

So last night Tommy was at the wood pile last night and as usual, Gracie was at his side, investigating the wood pile as he removed pieces to bring inside. Just as a back note on this story, Gracie and Henry have been investigating the pile recently. When I would let them out in the morning to pee, they would loiter at the wood pile, be we thought that there were assorted critters there, mice, voles and whatnot. So anyway, Tommy is out at the woodpile and Gracie is investigating, here and there. All of a sudden, Tommy hears a shrieking noise and a large creature bounces off his foot. Gracie, the lightning fast creature that she is, lunges for the what's-it. Tommy looks down and there is a HUGE BROWN RRRRRAAAATTTT. Holy Shit! And the best part, it was D E A D!! Just the way I like rats. Stone cold DEAD.

Tommy arrives back on the porch and declared that we have a ratter, Miss. Gracie and described the scene and the triumphant kill. How tremendous. Apparently there is a house down the road that keeps cat food outside for neighborhood cats, and any other kind of outside thing that wants to eat freekin cat food. So of course, this cat food will become RAT FOOD and where there are rats, there are baby rats. So Gracie will have to become more diligent to keep the rats out of the wood pile. We don't keep any food outside, hopefully there will be no reason for the rats to stay around our house.

We got another cat. Neener disappeared and we fear that he is in cat heaven, departed at the fangs of a Red Fox. We saw a Red Fox last night and that thing was pretty large. Gorgeous and huge and wonderfully red with a huge tail. We stopped and got the spotlight out. He stopped about 50 yards off the road in a field and his eyes reflected in the spotlight. We just looked at each other for a few minutes. As we drove off, I yelled to him "be careful buddy!"

Back to Neener; he disappeared on November 11th. The evening before we had a moment, he and I. I picked him up, he let me cuddle him for longer than the standard 10 seconds, he pushed away from me as I stood in the bedroom, holding him. I looked in his eyes, and he looked in my eyes; something told me that this was the last time I would see him, and hold him. He pushed off me and ran down the steps and sat at the door. As I opened the door he shoved himself through, as he did in his zeal to be in the great outdoors, and as I watched his 17 pound fuzzy ass disappear into the darkness, I asked Frank to look after him, as I did every evening. The next morning, when Hobbes was the only one at the door, I had a bad feeling about his whereabouts. I knew that he was gone and departed. I miss him, but I know that he went down swinging, hunting and fighting like the scrapper that he was.

Seamus is our new kitty and he is very sweet and funny. He's definitely not like Neener, but I did that intentionally. There was a huge Mane Coon Cat at the Animal Rescue League that looked like Neener with long hair. But Shay spoke to me, he said 'I'm the one, take me home and love me.' He has a cauliflower ear and is definitely underweight, but we are getting his ear all cleaned out and getting some weight on him. He sleeps with us and we think he's hard of hearing because his ears are partly closed due to old hematomas. He's great and beginning to explore the house, and getting used to the house and the dogs, who just want to sniff his ass, but Shay wants to hiss and spit at Gracie.

The Mustang is sitting still in the driveway, and that's exactly where it belongs right now. Snow, sleet, freezing rain and general winter awfulness. When I drove it last weekend, I totally got checked out by a middle aged man and his two teen aged sons in the Target parking lot. When I say 'I' got checked out, I actually mean the car got checked out and I just happened to be walking up to the car.

ok, I'm done! Thanks for reading and happy driving!

Have you ever had a day? Just a day, not good - or bad?

2009-10-27T06:50:00.000-07:00

Today and some days are just a day. Not good, not bad. Nothing good or bad happens, its just my mindset. I call it 'getting stuck in my own head' and it happens to me occasionally. On days like this, I have to constantly remind myself that I have a good - no, a GREAT life. There is not much that I need or should long for. I could detail the pros, which vastly outweigh the cons, but I won't.

Reality Shows - are they really reality?

2009-08-10T17:29:00.000-07:00

For the past, oh, I don't know, 17 years, there has been this strange phenomenon called reality shows. There have been many thought as to which show was the original reality show. For some strange reason, no one seems to want to mention the Real World on MTV. I'm not sure if the 'powers that be' don't think that MTV is a real TV station, capeable of producing anything aside from just playing a video. What happens when seven complete strangers are introduced to one another and told that they will be sharing a house for the next 6 weeks. The house they share is fantastic, with all amenities, including the obligatory hot tub, but the tiny catch is that there are cameras, infared and regular, watching you, 24 -7. So the Real World has been on MTV since 1992, so far as I can tell, this is the longest running reality show on tv. There are a few resons why this is the case, the main reason is that the MTV dempographic is always changing to be the 18 - 25 set. There is always a new set of eyes to watch this show, and becasue the cast is new every season; there is no host the way Big Brother and Suvivor, there is always a new city and a new set of drama queens to hate, love, fight, bicker, argue and love to hate.

So just as the Real World is, in my small and humble opinion, the original and I dare say, the best reality show created, there are some really, really bad, and pretty good realtity shows that I would like to chronicle.

So, riddle me this, Batman, what makes a reality show bad? And, if there is prize money involved, is it still a reality show, or is it a game show? For agruments' sake, we'll classify them as the same, if only becasue the individulas in this are generally an average person. There are some red flag indicators that will tell you if a reality show is going to be good; if its going to be strictly bubble gum, or its going to be something that will make the contestants become better people.

In no particlar order the the following reality shows are the worst, most train wrecked, overly dramatic, save-the-drama-for-your-momma, I can't avert my burning eyes, fluff, you have got to be kidding me shows.

Addicted to Beauty

Octo-mom. She just signed on FOX for a show

John and Kate Plus Eight. This should be called Kate the Shrew & her minions (and the sperm donor and whipping boy - John)

The Hills. Which, I'm obligated to say, that I have never watched a single minute of any of this show and I feel that my life is fuller for not doing so. I really don't understand any of it, but that aside, it makes my eyes burn.

The Real Housewives (of anything). Oh gawd, please, please, please tell me the world has seen enough of overprivleaged, botox injected, silicone plumped, spoiled, bitchy have it all housewives. Orange County, New York, Atlanta, New Jersey, please tell me that there is no more room for another city for five women who, all they really have to do is shop, workout, raise kids (with paid help) and screw their husbands. I'll tell you what, if that's all I had to do all day, I think I'd be a self-centered bitch also. The ONLY exception to the aforementioned rant is Caroline from New Jersey. Good family, hard workers and she's extremely passionate about how inportant her family is to her

NYC Prep. I can't even go there. Oveprivleaged small minded teenagers. What could be worse?

Flipping Out. Sad, but not sad in touching; 'Aaww, how sweet.' way, but sad in a 'Are you really seirous?' way. Funny, but not ha-ha funny; funny as in 'we're laughing at you, not with you'. I'm not saying that what he does is not meticiulous and perfectly put together, I just don't understand how someone can be so incredibly neurotic and manage people to flip a house and make a living. GO figure.

Miami Social. See above entry for NYC Prep, except they are adults who are convinced that if you are beautiful on the outside, there is nothing else that matters. Interestingly and sadly enough, these people will never know what unconditional love and acceptance is, because all of the people they are surrounding themselevs with are beautuful and shallow. How sad. Really sad.

Chincoteague Island and Snow Hill, Md

2009-07-12T17:57:00.000-07:00

Talk about needing to get away for a weekend, we needed it. It's almost as if we took this weekend for ourselves because for the next three weeks we have stuff going on all weekend. So we decided to escape for a weekend to our favorite B& B in Snow Hill, Md called the Mansion House http://www.mansionhousebnb.com/. Its actually in a bay side 'town' called Public Landing. Not only is it on the bay, but its right on the bay, so you get a fabulous breeze and a beautiful view across the water. George is the innkeeper and a great guy who will make a fantastic breakfast to keep you going until dinner.

So on Saturday we went to the Chincoteague Bay for some kayaking and it was well worth it. We were barley out of the channel where we launched the kayaks and there was a family of otters playing in the water. http://animaldiversity.ummz.umich.edu/site/accounts/information/Lontra_canadensis.html

We spied each other about the same time, and I think they were as curious about what we were doing as we were to see them. There were about six of them playing in the water. As we approached them, they would duck under the water and then pop up about 5 feet away, all while keeping an eye on us. As we passed them, we could hear them coming up for air and taking breaths. This was such an incredible experience and I feel so fortunate to have seen them so close and in person.

THEN we saw ponies with babies, who was sleeping. The guide told us that the ponies hang in groups called bands which generally consist of a stallion and a few mares. They were eating at the waters edge with one stallion, three mares and one baby. We continued to paddle around the bay to see what was there to see. There were people fishing, crabbing and a lot on pontoon boats that took the lazy tourists around. As opposed to kayaking.

When we were done with the kayaking, we went to a bar for some lunch and laughed at some guy that was busy getting hammered at 11:30 in the morning. Pretty funny because he was in a bar that had a pretty equal mix of tourists and locals and he was griping, among other things, about 'these freeking tourists...' He also was commenting that when he was in the Navy he said that he liked to, when he went to the bar '...go ugly early...' He said he wanted to get a girl that wasn't so great looking in the beginning of the night because she was going to be the prettiest girl. He said he wanted to avoid the rush. Yeah, funny! We learned a lot of stuff about that strange guy, and thankfully we were able to leave and stop learning about him. There is a God!

We actually made it onto Chincoteague Island; two dollars well spent, and walked our pins off before we even made it to the beach. We learned at the visitors center that there was a walking path that led to a viewing area for the ponies. As we approached the loop path parking area, we went from walking in the sun to walking under trees. I'm incredibly grateful that George thought ahead and gave us some heavy duty bug repellent that was in a cream form. I'm not sure who made the stuff, but it really worked. As we walked under the shaded area, we were ATTACKED by giant flying mosquito bombers. Oh mu gawd, they were huge and really bold. We were swarmed by about a few dozen of them. It was a scramble to get the backpack off, dig out the repellent and smear it on our exposed skin all while swatting the mosquitoes that were landing on our exposed skin.

After we battled the mosquitoes, we continued to walk towards the parking area to path. We herd the very distinct sound of horses naying and snorting. I looked at Tommy and we both silently agreed that we should follow the noise. We looked for a footpath, that I think we were not really allowed to be on, and came to a high tensile fence and a clearing. There was about 50 - 75 ponies all clustered together, eating and checking us out. It was really a great experience to know that we were not really allowed to be there and we found the ponies, en masse. When we were walking towards the ponies, the ground seemed to be moving and squeaking. I looked down at my feet and saw dozens, hundreds - I may say, toads! I couldn't grab ANY of them because I had highly toxic insect repellent on them. Total bummer and I would have smuggled one home for the garden. There were small ones, as small as a quarter and big ones as large as a bottom of a highball glass. They were all warning themselves on the sunny path. Very cute.

I think going back to Chincoteague is definitely on the agenda.

Next post: Reality shows... Where do they find these people??

John Gosslins' 350z Nismo

2009-05-27T05:12:00.000-07:00

I have to start this entry with the statement that I love the new Nissan 350z. I say new because I had an old 340z, the original version of the 350z, which was actually a Datsun. AND it was yellow! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Datsun Check the Wikipedia link for more details about Datsun and Nissan. At any rate, I really thought that car was the bomb! I bought it for $800. and it had no rear lights what so ever, including turn signals, and it ran rich. I didn't know there were no lights until I made a stop and right turn and heard the delivery truck behind me lay on his brakes and leave a patch of rubber during the panic stop to avoid catapulting me into the next intersection. I got the brakes lights fixed later on that day. So I have a special place in my heart for the Datsun 340z, now would like a Nissan 350z, but I'm content with my Mustang now.

So anyway, John Gosslin..... Ummm, I think he traded in the 350z in for a BMW M3, which is another good choice for a fun car. But I'm telling you right now, if he is going to get an apartment in New York City, he better get a beater Honda or Ford to drive up there. NYC is no place for a perfect, new BMW M3. But rumor says that he's going to be renting in the Trump Plaza (don't get me started about that fool!!), so he'll have valet parking. I suppose when you and your psycho, all-I've-ever-wanted-to-be-is-a-mom wife, have two litters of children and then get a reality show and then get divorced, you become an E-list celebrity.

Well, whatever... Enough of this foolishness.

My Husband, the Passenger Narcoleptic

2009-05-27T04:55:00.000-07:00

I must be a good driver because when Tommy and I go somewhere and I am the driver, it takes about 5 minutes and Tommy's chin in bouncing off his chest. We could be going from my parents house to our house, roughly a 20 minute drive. He's done and snoozing in the front seat. Thankfully when we are going on vacation and he's the navigator (it works better like that) he'll manage to stay awake if there are some navigational changes that we would have to make. However, if the road is straight, like say, uummm, route 95 to Myrtle Beach, he's done! I'm driving, listening to the radio, watching him doze. The best part about all of this is that he doesn't lay the seat back. He thinks that he's going to stay awake! Nnooooo, I don't think so. None the less, I take it as a compliment that he thinks that I'm a good driver (insert rainman here) and he's comfortable enough to fall asleep. It's cool, I dig it!

New and exciting? Not really...

2009-05-16T14:02:00.000-07:00

There are about a dozen things that I should be doing right now, and writing this Blog is not on that list. So what am I doing? Writing in this thing. Hell, why not? No sun, can't dry laundry outside and I have to start dinner soon.

On the other hand, there are about a hundred things that I could talk about... Oh where to start? Tommy and I just returned from Penn State where we watched Ani, Tommy's youngest sister, walk across the stage and get her degree in Agribusiness Management. Tom and Karen get a huge congratulations along with Ani because they have paid for college for nearly 10 years for all three of their children to attend college. Absolutely tremendous!

We took the Mustang and left the house at 6:15am. We arrived on campus at 8:20, exactly the time that I said I would be there... I know, I'm awesome. As I mentioned shortly before, we took the Mustang and I so totally and absolutely enjoy driving that machine. Up the hills, down the hills, around the corners; the damn thing sticks to the road so well, I wonder how fast I have to get the thing going to see if it'll fling itself off the road. I don't really want to try that, but its interesting to imagine. And, I couldn't have gauged the gas any better. We were pulling up to the gas station near the house and the gas readout said -0- miles until empty. I filled the tank with 14.5 gallons and realized that I had 1.5 gallons left in the tank. I could have driven to my parents house on that! Also, we got an average of 25.5 miles per gallon on this trip. Not bad for having my foot in it. We were about 80mph the whole way, except for the 45 mph through the town on the other side of the river at Harrisburg. Its a wonder you have to go from 80 to 45 through the town, which consists on not much more on the main strip than jerk off joints, seedy strip 'clubs', gas stops and restaurants. Interesting.

I forgot that Tommy drove home and he totally looks HOT driving that car. Well, he's the hottest thing on the planet to me, but he looks even hotter driving the Mustang. I love him...

And now onto a totally different subject (hello ADD!). The new Healthy Choice commercials with Julia Louis Dryfus are soooooo freeking funny! I nearly died when I saw this commercial for the first time. Check it...
http://www.spokespersonwanted.com/ Click on #2 and enjoy. If you get grossed out... well you need to lighten up! This is funny people!

That's all for me today!

Happy and safe driving!

Ash

Upcoming Topics

2009-04-23T05:07:00.001-07:00

Ninjas and Pirates; funny commercials and the employment of the correct car for a character in movies, does your car make you a tool.

Someone please tell my WHY

2009-04-21T06:45:00.000-07:00

Why Why Why do these little boys, by little I mean 16-18 year old boys, think the Volkswagen's are the COOLEST things that have ever been created?? No, not so much. There are two camps of Volkswagen drivers and one subset group. (Genny just hear me out here...)

The first set is the aforementioned 'little boys' that think that VW's are the total shit!! And as I may have mentioned before, not really. These boys do some crazy things to their new rabbits, and jettas such as big fat tires and spoilers on the rear of the car and skinny tires on the front of the car. I'll get to the fart cannons next. OK, lets think about this, fat tires and spoilers on the rear indicate that there is some kind of traction on the rear of the car. No, these are front wheel drive cars, so having these extra wide tires on the rear makes NO sense. Smaller tires on the front make even less sense. More traction to the drive tires makes for better take off, handling and grip in general. So if you want to look like Johnny the race car driver, put fat tires in the front. Then they like to lower these cars, but not by performance packages, no, they like to heat the springs to make them closer to the ground. This makes the ride incredibly stiff and doesn't really increase the performance of the vehicle.

What about these exhaust tips and aftermarket exhausts?? An aftermarket exhaust is suppose to add to thee performance of the vehicle by increasing the airflow out. The more air out, the more air in. However, if the owner did not enhance the intake, the outflow becomes almost irrelevant. Nonetheless, these these cannons on the exhaust are stupid and do not add to any performance lever of the car. They just make the car sound different, not even better. Not to mention that they are incredibly annoying.

These 'performance enhancements' that are really not enhancing anything, they are strictly cosmetic to make people think that they are big shot street racers. Pl-eeaassee!

So they are the first group. The second group of VW drivers are the people who are a little older, maybe 35 - 55 and have the money to buy a new or off lease VW that's in good shape. But the general definition of this group of people are that they are idealistic and think that their VW is the best thing on the planet. Generally these people will tend to own a MAC instead of a PC, they possibly waited in line when the new iPhone was unveiled to the public. They may wear organic shoes and generally love the fact that they are vegetarians or vegans. They decided to not buy a hybrid vehicle, not because they don't think they are great (Honda or Toyota ONLY), but because they had to order one. That would take to long to wait for it to come it. They would never consider a Ford of GM vehicle because they are way too common and anyone can drive them, hell, they practically give them away, right??

The the subset of both of these groups are the people who like the VW's and after buying one, they realize that they are incredibly expensive to fix. So they buy a VW and then it breaks and they realize that they have to keep it. So they drive it and when they pay it off, they sell it to the first willing sucker who will give them the Kelly Blue Book Private Party - Poor Condition price for it. Maybe the seller will throw in a half used set of snow tires and call it a deal! The seller just wants it out of their driveway, thank you very much!

One last thing then I'm done with my, ahem - observations...

In order to drive a new Corvette, the driver generally - 85% of the time, has to have three of the following traits. 60% of the time, you'll find that they have at least two of the following traits. 1. Bald(ing) 2. Old(er) 55+ 3. Facial Hair (generally a mustache) 4. Paunchy (generally doughy) 5. Driving like a total asshole. Now, there are exceptions to every rule, however, you can use this formula all you want, you'll find that it's pretty right -on... But what if the driver is a woman?? Generally she will not be any of these... She'll be ether totally high maintenance (You know and I know that a high maintenance woman is easily identifiable), or she's driving her present to herself for whatever milestone she decided that she'll buy a 'vette. All I've got to say about the latter is "Work it out Girl, you probably deserve it!!"

And something that I haven't mentioned at all; Drifting.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lM5wVKYZVDM

Then this guy. The man does some serious WORK!

http://video.kenblockracing.com/flash/player/

After you watch this video, YOU'LL be out of breath!

Thanks for reading and safe driving!

#1

2009-04-17T15:31:00.000-07:00

So here I am, writing a blog about my Mustang. I never thought that I would but here I am. There are a number of reasons that I want to write about my car; well I want to do more than just write about my car. I plan on talking about cars in general and how much we, as Americans, enjoy our cars. There are, of course, emotions that revolve around cars and sometimes those emotions are much more dramatic than that of the vehicle.

Something that may have triggered my thought process to want to do this was last night we were watching BBC America (more later on how much I LOVE that channel) and there was a BBC America Reveals: My Car is My Lover. We were awe struck at the two men who were being profiled. The first guy was, I think from San Francisco and drove a white mid 70's Volkswagen Bug whom he named 'Vanilla'. The man was in love with this car (emphasis on in love). Whenever he parked the car somewhere and got out, he kissed the car numerous times and told 'her' that he loved her. Ummm, yeah. Then there was the other guy, who was younger, maybe early to mid-20's had a 1990 Firebird with a lazy headlight - it shone on the ground directly in front of the bumper, no interior headliner and a faded paint job. He called it 'Todd' and referred to it as such. They both spoke about having 'sex' with their cars and the guy who owned Vanilla, went to far as to masturbate on the Firebird, aka Todd during the night after these 'mechaphiles' actually met.

The funniest thing about these guys was when they went to a car rally. There were all kinds of makes and models - everything from modified vehicles to run of the mill, plain old units. The owner of Vanilla was so aroused that he was touching himself and had a visible boner in his pants! I mean it was so bad for him that he was bending down, fingering the tail pipes and then smelling his fingers. I nearly died when I saw him do that. Then he was kissing and caressing the cars. I mean it was really weird!

The other guy, the mechaphile with Todd, was a bit more realistic about his obsession. He was aware that what he thought was strange and that he was apprehensive to talk about it, but he still spoke about wanting to 'rape' Todd the car. But he did mention the emotion of connecting with the car and really loving the car. But the sex part is a little strange. http://www.bbcamerica.com/content/366/index.jsp

This whole thing is really off the charts for someone who doesn't care about cars and just thinks that they are transportation. I agree that they are made to get you from one place to another, but on a different plane, they do exude an aura and a feeling. They do have emotion, the emotion that the owner gives them. The emotion of power, styling, grace, safety and comfort.

Take, for example, an article I saw on MSN today How to look cool driving a Mini Van. First off that's totally impossible. There is NO WAY anyone can look cool driving a minivan. I don't care if you are the hottest man or woman in show business, there is not a flaming chance that you will be cool. Ok, my point is that the car makes the driver have emotion and that emotion is transferred to the car... Make sense? Kind of, I suppose. Can you look freekin awesome driving a Mustang? Yes, but if you pull asshole stunts on the drivers around you, then you look like a flaming turd and decidedly unattractive!

One last thing about the emotion of the car. On BBC America's Top Gear, the best freekin show on TV, the hosts have the 'Wall of Cool' where the three hosts decide if a car is cool or not. There are four areas where a car can be and the worst place to be is in the Sub-zero because you are a true tool for driving that car.

http://www.topgear.com/us/

Check the site and you will understand.

Thanks for reading!