The Cynical Report

Virginia Foxx is an Idiot

2012-02-04T14:36:00.003-05:00

Back by not so popular demand (as in mainly just Odin's) more Cynical Report! Let's skip all the "sorry about the hiatus" shit because let's be honest, no one really missed it. TO THE POST!

In “Mixed Reviews for Obama Plan to Keep Down College Costs” Tamar Lewin tells us about the enthusiasm of college students regarding President Obama’s rhetoric about keeping college tuition down. Tamar also details the tempered reactions of the President’s peers, and talks about the chances of something actually getting done considering the tumultuous times our current political system are facing. The article does a good job at drawing the divide between idealistic academia and the more cautious crowd that is President Obama’s peers.

An Idiot

One quote from the article that caught my eye was one from North Carolina’s Republican Representative, Virginia Foxx, in which she states “The president is saying that people can’t afford to go to college anymore, and that just simply is not true…”. I am not big on partisan politics, but leave it to a Republican to make such a ludicrously out of touch statement. Representative Foxx is clearly not familiar with the typical middle class family’s finances. But I will be sure to send her my student loan notifications so that she can pay them, since they are so affordable.

However, I am not blindly optimistic about President Obama’s plan to keep tuition low. He said in the State of the Union Address that he would take federal help away from schools who cannot manage to keep tuition “affordable”. The only problem with this is, at least in the case of community colleges like ours, one of the reasons tuition is going up is because the cutting of state budgets, and a further decrease in funding would not help those schools.

I know this was short, but there IS more to come, I promise. Also, a start of something new. More details as I flesh it out.

As always I fully encourage any criticism, advice, suggestions, or general discussion in the comment area.
If you wish you can contact me at thecynicalreport@gmail.com, and please like/share my blog on Facebook and Twitter using the links on the side!

What We Have Going for Us | The Hairpin

2011-08-17T16:29:00.002-04:00

So I was feeling rather down the other day about my prospects in life, and my sister sent me a link to help make me feel better.

It did wonders for my mood that day, and I re-read it every time I feel discouraged, and I thought I would share it with all of you, maybe it will effect you like it did myself.

What We Have Going for Us | The Hairpin: "There are a few things people forget to tell you.

Each year of your twenties is worth three in regular time. The decade moves like dog years except that in the end you suddenly turn 30 as if you didn’t just age a single lifetime. Something happens between the ages of 20 and 25. This is your first go-round as an adult. Your brain shifts and closes and hardens like the soft spot on an infant’s skull. You try harder. You begin to stand up on those baby deer legs and learn how to carry yourself in challenging situations. You eventually grow into a human who is brave enough to wake up before brunch is over, and offices start answering phones with “good afternoon” instead of “good morning.” You’ll never quit being an animal, however.

Around 25 or 26 you will decide to really feel the rain on your skin. It may hurt. By this time, you have already made the big move from your parents’ nest. You’ll look around, survey your life and decide what to carry with you. Who to carry with you. This is the first time you let go of living life by reaction.

Make a list every morning of the smallest expectations. Note each item with a box, not a bullet. Draw an“X” inside each box after completing its corresponding task. This will give you a sense of accomplishment greater than simply striking through. Today you will email the last flagged address in your inbox. Today you will buy handsoap. You will end the night with a single window’s width of tabs open in your browser. You will sleep. It’s OK to add completed items in retrospect, if only to record your performed adulthood.

We are not so mysterious. If you want to get to know someone infinitely better, meet their parents for five minutes. We are attracted to people who were loved in the ways we were loved as children. We are attracted to people who are lacking in ways we understand.

We are all terrified to take our clothing off and equally eager to show our genitals to each other. Do not be so afraid. We tell people we love them when we are unprepared. When we don’t mean it. When we’re drunk. When we’re sober but filled with so many delicious chemicals in our infant skulls standing on our baby deer legs naked in the dark that we may as well be drunk.

Mostly, your relationships will end. You will hold people close to you with the knowledge that everyone is on a timeline. That everyone’s heart will eventually stop beating. Most of the time, though, things will not be this grim. If they were, no one would get laid.

The right people will be your memory bank. The right people will bring out the best in you.

Some people are the wrong people. Do not confuse them with the rare people who are inherently evil or bad. These people are just not for you.

There are the friends you meet for the occasional happy hour, and there are friends with whom you have longstanding Taco Tuesdays. Taco Tuesday means a bottle of wine for each person and peeling back the business-casual mask of the weekday while relaying mortifying tales of performed adulthood to one another. You hit reply all. You cried at your desk. You said “I love you” when you were unprepared or drunk or sober. Any day can be Taco Tuesday. These are the people who fill in your blanks. These are the right people.

We are social but we are not social media. We are social but we cannot survive on content alone. Sometimes being passive consumers of content works against us. If you don’t do it today you’ll put if off and then it will be awkward when you decide you really, really want to email this person. So do it today. Or don’t do it. Or maybe do it tomorrow, but if you don’t do it today you definitely won’t do it tomorrow. Again, make a list. Wash your face.

There is no IRL. This is everything."

More coming soon. Sorry about the hiatus everyone, I had some plans that fell through, so we are back at it here :)

Casey Anthony is Not Guilty

2011-07-07T13:51:00.002-04:00

Casey Anthony

On Tuesday, July 5th, Casey Anthony was judged by a jury of her peers, as the U.S. Constitution calls for, and she was determined to be not guilty, despite mounting evidence to the contrary. Full story here.

This is another case of me being disappointed in humanity, but not for the reasons you are guessing.

First of all, this woman is supposed to be innocent until proven guilty, so the mass surprise of everyone is kind of ridiculous. In the mind of the public she should have never been viewed as anything but innocent until the jury decided otherwise.

I understand people are going to take sides, so I really wouldn't expect anyone to be able to pull this one off.

Sign Seen After the Verdict Was Handed Down

But, second of all, and this one is what disappoints me, is the amount of people still harassing Casey Anthony after she was declared not guilty. From the TV talking heads acting surprised that she was to the people that stalked her to the restaurant across the street from the court house to harass her, that is not their place in this. The pundits on TV have no right to attempt to instill doubt about the verdict into the public. They should have only reported that she was not guilty, and the facts based around that verdict.

As far as the people harassing her, they couldn't be more wrong. Everyone harassing her should know they can't do anything about it, she cannot be tried again for her alleged crime.

My argument is very simple and very black and white. Guilty, or not guilty. She was determined to be not guilty, and she should be treated as such. Let's not Scarlet Letter this poor woman into exile, she had a fair trial, and was fairly deemed not guilty.

Conversations With a Soldier Part Deux

2011-06-26T16:09:00.001-04:00

When I first started talking to my brother, Kris, about his experiences as a soldier in Afghanistan I promised him that I would not blog about it. He said that I could blog if I wished, but I could not make the blog political. So here I am, blogging about Afghanistan in a non-political way, trying to be as objective as possible and probably failing because Kris, my brother, is at war. This is part two of a series of discussions with my brother about his time in Afghanistan, part one can be found here.

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Feeling established with Kristofer from part one, this time around the questions and conversation came much easier. I had just watched Restrepo, a documentary about a group of soldiers in Afghanistan, and that helped me come up with some more questions relevant to his activities on the ground.

So for this part in the series we jump right in. The first question I directed at my brother was how he and his company manage to communicate with the locals. He told me that all of the communication is done through a translator, and informed me that they don't really speak Arabic, and that there are two different tribal languages in the area he is in.

I asked him if interaction with the locals is frustrating, knowing that it must be due to the cultural and linguistic barriers. Shortly, he answered "Always...they will only tell you what you want to hear." Going on to explain that effective communication is possible as long as you have an interpreter, and that most of the time they do have one. As a side note I mentioned that I thought communication would be damn near impossible without a interpreter, and humorously he responded saying "Everyone speaks .50 Cal."

I then asked him if he ever has to deal with violent locals, clarifying that I was not referring to the ones with guns, obviously those are the people we are fighting, but that I was referring more so to disorderly people, and I found his answer quite surprising. "Not so much. I honestly can't think of one time..." I expressed my surprise and attempted to broach the subject more, attempting to clarify by asking if everyone was amiable, if not cooperative. Kristofer said, "The biggest thing is... You never really know who you are dealing with. You might be talking to a person that is completely cooperative at the time, but little do you know he shot an RPG (Rocket Propelled Grenade) at you last week."

I went on to ask him how his relationship with his fellow soldiers is, curious about how they interacted and on what level. He responded summarily, stating that "These men and women out here are my brothers and sisters...they are all I have."

In Restrepo they built an Observation Post, alternating between firefights and digging into the mountain, so I decided to ask my brother if he had ever been a part of building such a thing since he has been over there. H responded, "Funny you should ask...yes my platoon did build a COP (Combat Outpost) from ground zero."

To this point Kristofer had been surprisingly revealing about their operations over in Afghanistan, so I decided to push the envelope and asked him what his missions usually consist of. He responded much like I imagined he would saying with hesitation, "Uhhh...I can't give you too much on that one. We do a lot of different things...that is all I can give you for now."

Attempting a more general question, I asked him what his days normally consist of, mentioning observing from mountaintops and patrolling villages. He said "Both. Everything I do...I do it a lot."

Recently I had gotten word from my mother, who talks to Kristofer more than I do, that he would be opting out of coming to Louisiana for his last nine months of service so that he could stay over there and finish out his time. Suffice to say, I was upset about this revelation, and the next few questions revolved around that.

I mentioned what mom had told me about his plans, and simply asked why he would volunteer to stay in Afghanistan rather than coming out to Louisiana to finish out his time. My brother responded, "Kameron...there is nothing that will make you feel more alive than death lingering over you with every step you take."

My Brother, Kristofer

Now, this response didn't surprise me, my brother has always been a bit of an adrenaline junky. Enjoying fights and playing football, dangerous activities have always been in the forefront of his day to day life. So I mentioned that, asking if it was like a high for him. I didn't mean to oversimplify or devalue it, but I couldn't understand.

"Its more than adrenaline...it's... hard to explain. It's momentarily losing total control and then picking your nuts up off of the ground and, for lack of better words, embracing the chaos...Its like this... I know that the people around me are better off because I am around. I am completely confident (not cocky) that there is nobody that can do my job as well as me. Knowing this, I would stay because I am the best man for the job."

Curious about what would lead him to believe that he is the best man for the job, I asked him about the amount of praise he receives from his superiors. He told me about how he is in the running for solider of the month. This was news to me, I was not aware that the military had any such thing, so I inquired further about that. Kris responded, . I'm also going to a promotion board next month (your leaders have to submit you for both of these things)...so I would say that they trust in all of my abilities."

Curious about my brother's interactions with his superiors, I asked him if they get inspirational speeches a lot or something (in Restrepo there were a surprising amount). He said, "If there are I don't notice them. When we get new soldiers (we have gotten 4 since I have been out here) I try to instill them with fear. Fear will keep you alive. Fear is an emotion that will give men wings. Men have done absolutely incredible things, not because they were brave, but because they were scared shitless."

To wrap up this series of questions, I decided to ask what his favorite part of being in the Army is. He said "Without question its the camaraderie."

And, finally, I asked you guys to submit questions for me to ask my brother. Sadly, I only got one, and at first I wasn't going to ask him but I decided it would be fair to see if he would like to respond.

Anonymous asked "Does he feel we should be over there?"

Kristofer wanted to avoid a political discussion, and he wanted me to make it clear that he would only answer a question like this one time.

He said, "I feel like most Americans suffer from ADD. How can people so easily just discredit the fact that our country was attacked by terrorists? When you where a kid and someone said that your mother was a whore didn't you punch them in the mouth? If not you should have. True Americans are fighters, we are bred that way. We fight for our rights, we fight for our loved ones, we fight for our country, and, hell, we even fight for fun. Our country was founded by people willing to bleed for the freedoms that people now hide behind freedom of press and freedom of speech being two big ones. Now, at this point it is imperative that we fight to reform Afghanistan to prevent further attacks on American soil. Just in case the anyone feels like I didn't answer the question already...yes I feel like it is of utmost importance that we are over here.

...I will never answer a question like that again."

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If any of you guys have a question for my brother, PLEASE feel free to post it in the comments or e-mail me at thecynicalreport@gmail.com and I would love to ask him for you the next time I get a chance, and it may be used in a post like this one.

Stephen McDow and the Stupidity of the IRS

2011-06-19T14:37:00.000-04:00

Stephen McDow

A man by the name of Stephen McDow was arrested after the IRS mistakenly deposited $110,000 into his back account, reports The Huffington Post. The money was a tax return meant for an elderly lady. Stephen was taken to jail with a bail of $110,000 and faces up to four years in prison after spending $60,000 of it on student loans and his home mortgage.

When The Huffington Post linked their article on Facebook, they had included a status that said "Fair?"

Now I really love The Huffington Post, but this was really a stupid question. Of course it is fair.

In this case, he knew the money wasn't his. If you go to the bank, and you have $110,000 that you didn't earn, don't spend it. I can only imagine the temptation one would feel in the case of this man, but with a sum of money that large, someone is looking for it, and they are going to find it. To be honest, this man lucked out that it was a Government mistake and not some criminal mistake, because he would probably have to worry for his life if that was the case. It was just an all around bad decision to spend a dime of that money, there was no way it was going to end well.

I do not think he should spend four years in prison though, because it is important to remember that the IRS did make a mistake here, it doesn't all fall to him. He should have to pay the money back through some sort of payment system, but there is no way this man should lose four years of his life because of the combined stupidity of himself and the IRS. That would not be fair.

We have too many people caught up in our penal system for ridiculous things anyway, let's not add Stephen to the list.

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Birthdays and Black Holes

2011-06-16T21:18:00.000-04:00

Scientists recently watched as a passing star was shredded by a black hole, which is significant since black holes are invisible to the naked eye until they are in the process of devouring an energy source, such as a star. That whole news story can be read here, but I want to talk about something it else it got me thinking about.

We are all going to die. At some point every single one of our lives will end due to some condition. Cancer, disease, etc. But what this news article got me thinking about is that all the things we associate with death are things we understand (to an extent).

I can handle death by random illness, or perhaps less commonly a random act of violence. Not that I want to die, dying scares the hell out of me, but I can comprehend incurring a fatal injury or disease. However, the fact that I could die due to some random cosmic act is something I had never explored at any length up to this point in my life.

Ungodly Radiation Incoming

I know it isn't likely, and this isn't the beginning of me becoming someone who worries about the world ending at any given point, but I find the thought of my death being attributed to a wave of radiation from a star exploding in some distant galaxy to be rather unsettling.

Or perhaps more likely, the idea of my life ending because of a massive solar flare from our own sun raining down an ungodly amount of radiation upon me seems like a total ripoff.

I would much rather get the cancer or full blown AIDS, at least then you get some sympathy, and maybe some cool or insightful stories.

When I get to the pearly gates of Heaven or the fiery ramparts of Hell I want to be able to have a good death story for my partners in necrosis. That would be much more badass than to be left standing before my maker saying "Oh, I don't know, I was playing some video games and here I am, you tell me."

By the way, it's my birthday, so there's that.

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Politicians, Please Stop Using the Work Computers for Porn

2011-06-14T13:35:00.004-04:00

Lulz Security Logo

Update: As of around 6 o'clock on June 15th The Huffington Post is reporting that Lulz Security hacked into the CIA's website. I think they may actually be doing us a favor, maybe our Nation's vital infrastructure will get it's shit together so we can prevent more serious cyber attacks in the future.

Reading headlines this morning, I stumbled upon a news story that involved our US Federal Government being hacked by a group called Lulz Security (that story can be read here). Now, the attack didn't put any of our information at risk, but it got me thinking.

I remembered to a few years back when China's Government successfully hacked into the Pentagon (to jog your memory) and I decided to find out how often these kind of hacks into our vital Governmental systems actually take place.

What I found was pretty shocking. All according to the Office of Management and Budget, there are more than one hundred cyber attacks against Federal agencies everyday. In 2009 there were about 30,000 cyber attacks against us, and in 2010 Federal agencies reported 41,776 cyber incidents. That represents a 39% increase in cyber attacks going from '09 to '10.

The worst part is, most of the attacks came from instances of phishing, also known as filling out that e-mail form for your free trial of Viagra. The fact that the people that run our country are constantly falling for fake forms to fill out and clicking dirty links is frightening to me. These people should have to go through some classes or something on how to protect US interests.

Just knowing that the US Government has the Office of Management and Budget on the case for cyber attacks tells me that we are obviously not prepared to handle an attack, we should have a specialized Office of Cyber Attacks or something, these things are pretty serious. I really don't want a group of Government hired accountants in charge of keeping our information safe, I don't even want them to be the ones keeping track of how often we are attacked.

Two pieces of advice for the US Government. One, helping that Nigerian Prince isn't going to help US foreign relations, and sure as hell isn't going to get us any more oil (hint: he isn't really a Nigerian Prince).

And two, get an external hard drive for all that porn you are downloading.
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If you enjoyed this post please hit the +1 button at the bottom, it helps get the blog noticed, and as always I fully encourage any criticism, advice, suggestions, or general discussion in the comment area.

If you wish you can contact me at thecynicalreport@gmail.com, and please like/share the blog on Facebook and Twitter using the links on the side!

Tracy Morgan Does What Comedians Do

2011-06-11T13:21:00.001-04:00

Tracy Morgan has been under fire for his most recent tirade about the gay and lesbian community, continuing a history of doing so. This time he is in trouble time for claiming things such as "...gay is a choice...God don't make no mistakes." Tracy also informed a crowd that if his son ever came out to him as gay, Tracy would stab him to death. Clearly comments like these are outrageous and unacceptable, but I have one problem with the public's outcry.

All of this was said in a comedy club.

Now let me be sure to assure everyone that I do not dislike the gay community in anyway, I have a surprising amount of gay relatives and I think anyone who has a problem with gay rights or any such thing is an extremely bigoted person.

But as long as I have been alive, the comedy stage has been the epitome of free speech. Up there, a comedian can choose to shock a crowd into laughter using highly offensive humor, or he/she can stand there and make jokes. Tracy Morgan has done the former for many years, so this type of thing shouldn't even be news.

The real problem here is that a bunch of people who know him from the hit comedy TV show "30 Rock" went to see their favorite (and clean) character Tracy Jordan, and what they got was an uncensored and uncut Tracy Morgan.

It's easy to get sucked into the Tracy Morgan hate in all of this, because his comments were despicable and the media does a great job of sensationalizing everything, but it is important to remember that everything he said was within the confines of a comedy club. Tracy Morgan isn't roaming the streets gay bashing, he simply made jokes he normally would have, to an audience that wasn't targeted well for his type of comedy.

If you enjoyed this post please hit the +1 button at the bottom, it helps get the blog noticed, and as always I fully encourage any criticism, advice, suggestions, or general discussion in the comment area.
If you wish you can contact me at thecynicalreport@gmail.com, and please like/share the blog on Facebook and Twitter using the links on the side!

Movie Reflection: Pulp Fiction

2011-06-06T15:46:00.000-04:00

Pulp Fiction is a film directed and co-written by the great Quentin Tarantino, and easily one of the all around best movies I have seen in recent memory.

Pulp Fiction follows the misadventures of LA Mobsters Vincent Vega (John Travolta), Jules Winnfield (Samuel L. Jackson) and Butch Coolidge (Bruce Willis) as their stories ingeniously intertwine, and in classic Tarantino fashion, do so out of chronological order.

The first thing I noticed when watching this movie was the incredible dialogue that takes place between the characters, especially between John Travolta and Samuel L. Jackson. The chemistry these two have on screen, combined with the amazing dialogue written for their characters, set up some of the coolest scenes to ever be in a movie, and the most memorable scene in my personal movie watching history.

(explicit warning)

The scene above is from the first twenty minutes of the movie, and the entertainment value never goes down from there. The fire in Jules we see in the above scene never goes away, and the calm cool collectedness of Vincent becomes a staple of the film. There were a couple of moments where I thought the movie kind of dragged on, and a few scenes I believed we just filler, but the ingeniousness of Quentin Tarantino shines through when it turned out that through two and a half hours worth of movie he only showed me things that mattered to the overall plot. Every single thing comes back around and every scene is important.

Something else that stuck out to me was the amount of smoking. I don't have a problem with smoking, I don't smoke myself, but I suppose it is really a sign of the times. The amount of smoking in movies back then compared to how often you see it now, it has become much more of a rarity in today's politically correct environment. This really is too bad because this movie would not be the same without the smoking; it adds such a sense of "cool" to the entire film. I've never wanted to smoke a cigarette more than after seeing this piece of cinema.

While almost everything in this movie was fantastic, there were a couple of things that caught my attention that I did not think fit.

The first thing I disliked quite a bit (spoiler alert) is how John Travolta's character just dies. I understand it was important to the movie that he dies, and in the end his death ties together the rest of the plot. I didn't dislike that he died, I disliked how he died. It was so disingenuous the way they just got rid of him like that. In my opinion Tarantino didn't make it seem important enough.

The second thing that I disliked was how Jules (Samuel L. Jackson) interacted with his boss, Marsellus Wallace. If the audience is supposed to believe that Marsellus is the big boss, we shouldn't have Jules, one of our main characters, who also happens to be an underling to Marsellus, talk to him like Marsellus is somehow beneath him. It was a inconsistency, but in my mind it was a major one, because it removed me from the immersion of the film, even if it was for just a second.

Along with those negatives, I felt like Butch's (Bruce Willis) storyline was kind of thrown in to the mix as an afterthought. It all comes back around, but his storyline just doesn't feel as important to me as Vincent's and Jules' parts in the narrative.

Overall, I found that Pulp Fiction lived up to the hype. We don't often see movies with an all-star cast like this succeed as well as Pulp Fiction did. I do realize that a lot of the names in this movie were not quite as big then as they are now, but the acting was superb and the stylistic filming and framing of the shots were amazing. All that combined with an extremely well chosen soundtrack and we have what I believe is one of the best, and most influential movies of all time.

If you enjoyed this post please hit the +1 button at the bottom, it helps get the blog noticed, and as always I fully encourage any criticism, advice, suggestions, or general discussion in the comment area.
If you wish you can contact me at thecynicalreport@gmail.com, and please like/share the blog on Facebook and Twitter using the links on the side!

Conversations With a Soldier

2011-05-30T22:29:00.002-04:00

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Initially, I felt timid and very hesitant to broach any of the many serious subjects one can inquire about when talking to a soldier, so I started simple. I asked him if it is hot or cold over in Afghanistan. Now, this is a stupid question, but I give him credit for answering it without being too much of a smart ass. Kris responded as wryly as he could muster using text by saying "It's hot during the summer and cold in the winter... but always cold at night."

Seeing that I would have to step up my game to keep us both engaged in this conversation, I decided to pick it up and ask some real questions. With a slight bit more confidence I followed up by asking what the atmosphere around camp was like when they are not on a mission. This was only the second time Kristofer and I had spoken since he shipped to Afghanistan so I didn't really expect much from him in this conversation, but he gave a more detailed response than I had bargained for. "You have to constantly be on your toes... even if you are in a 'safe' place there's always the chance that they will try to overrun you... or mortar you. But you are able to joke around a little during that time, too. You have to have a pretty morbid sense of humor."

My next question was about the atmosphere when on a mission, and whether or not they run day and night, because I only think of things happening during the day. I informed him that every time I imagine him in a fight out there I always see it as a movie. "We run missions day and night," he wrote. "It doesn't matter. Sometimes we step light and sometimes we don't (mission depending). I suppose it would be like a movie if you were on the outside looking in, but when you're in a firefight there is nothing Hollywood about it."

Kristofer Wedekind

Really feeling my oats now I asked him how often shots are fired. This is a question that I only partly wanted to hear the answer to, and being ever so intuitive I think he got a sense of that, telling me all I need to know in his answer by responding "Often...once a week maybe, give or take. Wanting only to cautiously prod this topic, I asked if every firefight has a fatality, or if there are more surrenders than I imagine. "It ends when one side is dead, they surrender, or they run away. Someone always gets fucked up in a firefight, them or us."

A few moments later Kris asked, "Do you know what its like to be in a firefight?"

Feeling I may have hit a nerve, I wrote that I had no idea what it is like. In an attempt to relate to me the unrelatable, Kristofer wrote "Its Hell... Imagine the most terrified you have ever been and times that by a million. Imagine watching your friend die. Then imagine digging deep, pushing forward, and killing ones that would harm you and others you love."

Sensing that it would probably be a good idea to switch to a more pedestrian question, I asked how often he gets to sleep, and if he has ever hallucinated due to sleep deprivation. He responded, "I've been up for days at a time...no hallucinations here. There is a saying in the army 'Stay alert, stay alive'. You have to live by it! The second you let your guard down you die. My brother next to me depends on me staying alert and not being complacent. If I let him down he could die."

My last question was how often he got to partake in any type of entertainment. Television, movies, boardgames, sports, music, etc. "Lol," he wrote, "every chance I get... not often...I watched a little bit of tombstone on my buddies laptop earlier...with no sound. no games really... uh ping pong sometimes...cards blackjack poker dominoes spades...that's about it."

After answering this question Kris informed me that he had to go get some sleep before his next day, and presumably, mission. Disappointed that our talk was over for now, I accepted that he had to go to sleep so that he would be better prepared for the next day, and we said our goodbyes for the evening.

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Depending on reader response, I hope that Conversations With a Soldier becomes part of a series. Given the nature of Kris' and I's correspondence the chances of that happening are very hit or miss, so we will see. If any of you guys have a question for my brother, feel free to post it in the comments and I would love to ask him for you the next time I get a chance, and it may be used in a post like this one.

I hope you had a happy Memorial Day, and God bless our troops, past and present.

Tiki Barber Compares Himself to Anne Frank

2011-05-28T12:33:00.000-04:00

Tiki Barber

Tiki Barber, the former New York Giants running back and future Hall of Famer had this to say about a recent situation he was in. "Lep's Jewish. And it was like a reverse Anne Frank thing." "Lep" is his agent who's full name is Mark Lepselter.

So what horrific situation could Barber have been in to feel like he could compare himself to Anne Frank?

Lepselter allowed Barber to stay in his attic after he broke up with his pregnant wife and ran away with his girlfriend, Tracy Lynn Johnson.

Anne Frank

Now, I am not typically oversensitive to this type of thing, and I would normally come to the defense of someone saying something like this, but I know a joke when I see one, and this was not a joke. At least, if it was a joke, it wasn't really funny at all, it was simply him comparing his experience of living in an attic to that of Anne Frank's.

I am not going to read any sort of antisemitism into his statements. He clearly does not not have anything against the Jewish people given his past history in which Tiki was a guest of President Shimon Peres in Israel five years ago, but his statement does have a sting of insensitivity.

I simply cannot buy that a man who runs away from his commitment and responsibility to his wife and child is comparable to Anne Frank's struggle and her family's escape from an army of brainwashed murderers.

While I am sure his pregnant wife may have seemed like a Nazi when he left her high and dry, I can assure him that no such comparison need be made.

As always I fully encourage any criticism, advice, suggestions, or general discussion in the comment area.
If you wish you can contact me at thecynicalreport@gmail.com, and please like/share my blog on Facebook and Twitter using the links on the side!

An Apology and While I Was Away

2011-05-27T17:05:00.000-04:00

First off, allow me to apologize for my absence the last seventeen days. I had intended to make a post letting everyone know I would be gone for a while to attend my two best friend's wedding in Dallas, but I had computer problems before I departed, and never got a chance to let everyone know in advance, I hope you all will forgive this. I plan on picking up the once a week movie reflection next week, but for now let's go over something that really caught my attention while I was on vacation.

Deyan Valentinov Deyanov

One of the most shocking things to come out in the last couple weeks, and probably in my life, was the stabbing and beheading that took place in the Canary Islands. This is of course relatively old news at this point, but a Bulgarian man by the name of Deyan Valentinov Deyanov beheaded a woman in the Canary Islands. Homeless, and reportedly having gone through a recent break-up, Deyanov followed Jennifer Mills-Westley, a grandmother of five, into a supermarket, stabbed her fourteen times, and then proceeded to cut her head off as he proclaimed he was a "prophet of God." He then took the head with him and was walking along the sidewalk with it before being detained. He is currently being held in a psychiatric unit, and no motive has been identified for the killing. More information can be found here.

Jennifer Mills-Westley

Hearing this news story blew my mind. I can't believe we live in a world where a 60 year old grandmother can be beheaded in the middle of a supermarket with screaming onlookers. Jennifer Mills-Westley had told security guards that this man was stalking and threatening her life, and all they did was shoo him away and send Jennifer off. Also, he managed to steal the knife he used in the assault from the supermarket in which he killed her.

But what blows my mind the most is the weapon with which he managed to behead this poor woman. He had a knife. Now, I have not cut off many heads in my life (that tally is currently at zero) but, having a basic knowledge of anatomy, I believe I can safely claim that it is not an easy feat. There is a lot of stuff in the neck to cut through, not the least of which is bone. The fact that he used a simple knife to cut this woman's head off causes another case of deep disappointment in the human race within me. This tells me that he managed to stab this woman fourteen times with a knife, AND saw her head off, with people looking on. I understand that the witnesses may have not been able to stop the stabbing, I imagine that could have very well happened in the blink of an eye, but cutting off this woman's head with a knife had to take a little bit of time in which people were simply watching him.

I know the shock of seeing something like that must have been extreme, just reading about it was quite shocking, but I don't want to believe that people were not able to stop the severe mutilation of Jennifer's body, the prospect of doing so is just too sad to me.

Movie Reflection: Thor

2011-05-09T14:41:00.000-04:00

Ok, so a couple disclaimers right off the bat. One, I am not a comic book guy, so this movie will be reflected upon merely as a movie guy, as it should be considering that if a movie wants to make any money, it needs to appeal to more than just comic book people.

And two, if you are a comic book person, don't hate me.

***SPOILERS

The Good

We will start with the couple things that Thor did well. One of the best parts of this movie for me was the music. The music in this movie was composed by Patrick Doyle, who is an internationally respected film composer, and I have to say, he was a great pick-up for this film given his experience with epics such as Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, Eragon, and Henry V. His experience shone through in this film. The music fit the movie excellently and was perfectly crafted.

The other thing Thor did well was the casting. Chris Hemsworth just looks like Thor, and he is a decent actor. Also, the pick-up of Anthony Hopkins to play Odin was just wonderful, and Tom Hiddleston played a great Loki. He really is that pale, and Kat Dennings is a babe. The acting was excellent through and through, I was impressed.

The short scene in which he walks into a pet store looking for an animal to ride was gold.

The Bad

And oh boy, was there a lot of it. Steel yourselves. The first thing I noticed was that I hated the main character. Thor was an obnoxious brat, and obviously arrogant to the point of stupidity. I understand this was a story telling point in that he would be punished and be changed, but he was such an ass in the beginning of the movie that I doubted King Odin's wisdom in passing the kingdom on to Thor in the first place. It's as if the movie expects me to forget that everything that happened wasn't Thor's fault to begin with when he acted arrogantly in his invasion of Jotunheim (the Frost Giant world), disobeying his father's orders. So immediately I had a serious problem liking the main character, which very much got in the way of enjoying the film.

Also, Thor's little band of warriors seemed greatly out of place. In the movie they never really did anything at all. They went with Thor to Jotunheim and they kicked some butt there, but anymore than that they were really just characters to make sure the audience had a stake in Asgard while Thor was on Earth. They were simply disappointing in their attempt to help Thor save Earth from the Frost Giant fire breathing metal golem that Loki sent (seriously, what was that thing).

As far as Thor's "changed man" (overdone) storyline, it was not executed very well. Almost all of the events in this film take place in a span of 48 hours, which is a ridiculous notion. I mean, they built an entire army compound around Mjöllnir (Thor's hammer) in less than a day. Clearly not possible. Also, exactly when he changed was unclear to me. I understood the traumatic experience of not being able to retrieve Mjöllnir from the rock (which by the way, also overdone, hello King Arthur) but even after that, he was still a bit of an ass. Or maybe I am projecting.

The Ugly

In Asgard, everyone has British accents

Random Asian character in Asgard (who also has a British accent)

Stupid one liners. "Next." "At least give me a challenge."

Banishing someone to Earth so they will become a better person is...laughable

Kat Dennings' character, Darcy, comedic relief to the point of annoyance

If in same Universe as other superheroes, where are they to save town

Summary

For me, Thor could only go as far as the special effects and music could take it, and they did a good job with that stuff. But the story was thin and overdone, and the characters were too uninteresting to make me care about what was happening to them in the film.

--Kameron

On a more personal note I think I will be doing these movie reflections at once a week. It will vary, depending on funds, whether or not the movie I do will be a new release or more of a classic, but we will see. In fact, YOU guys tell me what movie to see. I will be doing one regardless, but if someone wants to recommend something, or you want something reviewed, let me know and I will take a look at it!

As always I fully encourage any criticism, advice, suggestions, or general discussion in the comment area.
If you wish you can contact me at thecynicalreport@gmail.com, and please like/share my blog on Facebook and Twitter using the links on the side!

Success

2011-05-05T16:36:00.000-04:00

In High School and for a time after, my success was to get any full-time job and live out the rest of my life. I was the guy who had no aspirations. Anyone that knew me then would claim, and correctly so, that I truly did not give a damn about anything as far as life after High School, even my family would have told you that my plans were to "chill" and go to college. But even as far as college went at the time, I was unmotivated and directionless.

Two days after High School graduation, I left Michigan to visit some friends in Dallas. Long story short, I fell in love with being in the busy atmosphere and all of the friends I had went to visit were amazing. One of them needed a roommate. I volunteered. But of course to do this, I would need money to pay rent for the apartment I would be moving into. And to do this, I would need a job. But this would be no problem because I had no self respect or ambitions, so as long as whatever job I could get could pay the bills, I would be fine with it.

Enter Wal-Mart

I had put out over 100 applications at one point. Two interviews and a few phone calls later, I was now a Wal-Mart employee, and I was living the dream. Making $9.40 an hour working overnight. Spend my nights working my ass off (working there was NOT easy) and spend my days just chilling with my best friends. It was the life. However, somewhere between getting yelled at for having overtime and getting yelled at for cutting my overtime, I became disenfranchised with my working conditions. The dream had started to fade, and it was time for me to say goodbye to my friends (knowing I would be back some day) and head back to Michigan where I would begin the next step on my way to self-actualization.

Success at this point had taken a dramatic turn for me, for the better, but not by much. I knew at the time I entered college that I no longer wished to work for any sort of large corporation. I will be damned if I am ever just a number to some random big business ever again. It was the most dehumanizing and degrading thing I've ever been a part of, and I made a vow to myself at the time when I left Wal-Mart that I would not repeat it.

So I had that. I knew that whatever I did, I would enjoy that, and enjoy chilling in my free time. During my first semester in college, I went through a few renditions of what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. The first was some type of auto mechanic, my uncle owns a shop in Beaumont, Texas and I would be guaranteed a job there. So this choice was practical, but after hearing a few people around me talk cars, I realized that I could not care less about cars or how they work, much less how to fix them, so that was out. The next plan was to be a medical marijuana dispensary owner. I was completely serious about this one, but after looking into it and assessing the risks involved as far as legality, combined with the fact that I would be stuck in this Godforsaken state, I decided that this would not be the life for me.

And that is where we are at now. One week removed from my first semester at college in which I got a 4.0 (see, I'm not dumb, just not motivated), and I have a real dream of success, but this one is much more serious than any previous ideas. I've decided I want to write. This fulfills two of my needs in a career; mobility, and self management. I do not know if this is realistic, but what dreams are? This is the first dream I have ever really had, and I plan to run with it. This will be my success.

So if you are one of my returning readers, please, hold on tight, and enjoy the ride with me. And if you are new, and this is the first post you have read of mine, welcome, I am ecstatic to have you.

--Kameron

Osama's Body

2011-05-04T16:10:00.001-04:00

First off, allow me to wish everyone a happy Star Wars day. May the fourth be with you :)

Today, I want to address the outcry for pictures of Osama Bin Laden's dead body to be released into the public domain. Many people are demanding the release of these photos, ranging from conspiracy theorists to families of victims of 9/11.

First off, I want to call out the conspiracy theorists on this one. I will be the first to admit that I entertain conspiracy theories from time to time, but in this case why would the Obama administration claim to have photos knowing it would incense everyone into wanting to see them, and then refuse to release the pictures when they could have just as easily claimed to never have any photos. It does not make sense for them to lie just so they would have to lie again to prevent the public from seeing non-existent photos. Furthermore, even if pictures were released, most conspiracy theorists would simply claim that they were altered. Conspiracy theorists are relentless, and generally will not accept any proof contrary to their initial opinion.

Moving on from that, I feel like the Obama administration is making the right call on this one. Osama's dead body is not a trophy, and it should not be released to the public as such. Doing so would cause international unrest, and lead to more danger for our soldiers overseas. Imagine if the terrorists killed one of our leaders, and then released a gruesome photo of his dead body. I, for one, would be infuriated, as would the general public. If a photo of Bin Laden's dead body was to be released, it would be seen as a slap in the face to the terrorists, and other countries would also view it as distasteful. One thing we do not need is for other countries to hate us more.

And, finally, it is good to remember the circumstances of Osama's death. He was shot in the head, right above his left eye, and in the chest. Both at close range. These pictures would not be a pretty sight, and I imagine that, with the exception of his beard, he would be unrecognizable to the general public. I believe that if there is something our society doesn't need, it is to be further desensitized. Slathering the news with photos of this gruesome spectacle would surely do that, if nothing else.

As always I fully encourage any criticism, advice, suggestions, or general discussion in the comment area.
If you wish you can contact me at thecynicalreport@gmail.com, and please like/share the blog on Facebook and Twitter using the links on the side!

Osama Bin Laden Is Dead

2011-05-02T12:30:00.001-04:00

I debated actually posting on this subject last night and decided to sleep on it. This morning I did the normal routine. Got up, handled the dental hygiene, and got on Facebook to see what everyone is talking about as I always do. I expected everyone to be discussing Osama to an extent, but it appeared that all those discussions ended at about 3 am last night (showing that us as a society has quite an ADD problem, but that is besides the point of this post). However, in the time that it was the topic of the moment for U.S citizens, some interesting questions were raised that I feel need to be explored.

Does his death actually mean anything? Are we celebrating revenge? Is it just bringing us together? And what does that mean for us as a society?

Does his death actually mean a damn thing in the "War on Terror"? No it does not. The "War on Terror" is a war against an ideology. Osama is nothing but a personification of that ideology. Someone will take his place. Al-Qaeda is a criminal organization, Osama had a right hand man, and his right hand man has a right hand man. It does not end, and it never will. So as far as that goes, we really do not have anything to celebrate, but we are.

Are we celebrating revenge? To an extent, I believe so. If you look at the core of the situation, everyone is simply celebrating the death of a human being. Now expand it a bit, bring in some roles, and we are victims of a terrorist celebrating said terrorist's death. In this capacity, I do understand the celebratory nature of the occasion by those families that were directly effected by any deaths that may have been caused by his attacks. But that is not an argument for justification that anyone else should attempt to invoke.

There are a ton of people that say "Its bringing us together!" and this statement would be supported by the flood of Facebook pages dedicated to the liking of "Osama is dead!" and "The guy who killed Osama" I personally found the sudden flood of fair weather patriots to be rather nauseating especially since all of those pages were probably started by people who just want to get a lot of likes on a page they started and care much less about any meaning, symbolic or otherwise, that his death may carry. But I desperately hope for all of us that we do not need death to bring us together as a Nation. In these times when not even our own government can get anything done, where we entered the 11th hour of a complete government shut down, and I did not see even a quarter of the togetherness as citizens that I saw in Osama's death. I simply cannot accept, because it truly would bring me great sadness, that only in death can this great country be brought together, even for a night on Facebook.

What does it mean to me? When I got the news, my honest to goodness first thoughts were "Maybe this means my brother can come home now." Him being a soldier in Afghanistan, I know this is a false hope, but it was my reaction to the news, and I thought I would share it.

I want to leave you with something my best friend said that I feels sums up my feelings, and I hope it touches you like it did me. Regardless of religious affiliation, it carries all the meaning in the world.

"Stop rejoicing over another human's death. He's only a symbol. Pray for peace."

As always I fully encourage any criticism, advice, suggestions, or general discussion in the comment area.
If you wish you can contact me at thecynicalreport@gmail.com, and please like/share the blog on Facebook and Twitter using the links on the side!

Movie Reflection: A Clockwork Orange

2011-05-01T01:33:00.000-04:00

A Clockwork Orange is a film directed by Stanley Kubrick, based on the Anthony Burgess novel by the same name. And it is safe to say that it blew my mind.

A Clockwork Orange did not screw with me in a classical sense. The ideas presented in the movie are not hard to wrap one's mind around, but the cinematography gave it a strange voyeuristic effect that made it seem like I was watching something I was not supposed to be. That, combined with the intentional association of typically happy compositions with scenes of "ultra-violence" left me with a disturbed feeling of disassociation with my own life for a couple hours after viewing the movie.

The first thing I noticed in this movie was the play-like feel I received from the actors. All of the lines were delivered very much as if it was meant to be an on-stage performance. This could have been a sign of the times, being filmed in the early 70's, but I also got the impression that a lot of the actors were classically trained, leading to a very play-like atmosphere on screen, and I quite enjoyed that.

In the beginning of the movie the word "ultra-violence" was used frequently. I have a bit of a problem with this in that none of the actions portrayed in the film constituted, in my mind, "ultra-violence". Now, maybe this can also be attributed to the film's age, as there is no doubt a bunch of these scenes were very edgy in the early 70's. I had always heard about the infamous rape scene(s). Not that I looked forward to viewing rape, as I find it quite disturbing, but none of the scenes really came across to me as being particularly gruesome or over the top.

Another thing I noticed early on in the film was all of the eroticism in random places throughout, such as in the abandoned lobby where the "droogs" hung out. On the wall there were pictures of naked guys with their genitalia crossed out and a few dirty and disturbing phrases written, such as "If it moves, kiss it" and "Suck it and see". Also, a little later on, our main character, Alex DeLarge, broke into a house where all the walls were covered with erotic paintings, and even a sculpture of a penis becomes heavily involved in the story. Now, maybe this is my notoriously dirty mind at work noticing all these things (and anyone who knows me may claim this) but I think that this is Stanley Kubrick simply doing a good job of setting up a disturbing atmosphere.

*Spoilers From Here On*

There were a few things I noticed from Alex's time in prison. The first was his admittance of enjoying the Bible, followed by all of his sociopathic reasons why, ranging from his desire to be one of the Romans torturing Jesus, to his love of the Bible's frequent sexual depictions. He did note that he had to skip the boring parts to find the interesting bits. Then there was the clever foreshadowing of the rest of the story by the priest, explaining how one cannot simply be made good, but has to choose goodness for oneself (this is also the overarching message of the movie). Another thing I loved was Chief Guard Barnes.

(explicit warning)

Barnes was a light-weight version of Gunnery Sergeant Hartman as seen in one of Kubrick's later films, Full Metal Jacket.

(explicit warning)

Alex's "rehabilitation" toward non-violence easily made up the most frightening scenes in the movie for me. Almost everyone has at least seen a still frame of this before. Alex in a straight jacket, tied to a chair, with eyes clamped open. A frightening sight, no doubt.

I found the music in A Clockwork Orange absolutely wonderful. Pieces like Beethoven's 9th and The Funeral of Queen Mary are obviously great examples of music, but it was the way music was used in this film that blew me away. The title music from A Clockwork Orange is an electronic transcription of Henry Purcell's Funeral of Queen Mary by Wendy Carlos, and it created an effect of disturbance throughout the movie.

(Funeral of Queen Mary by Wendy Carlos)

Overall, I found A Clockwork Orange to be pretty enjoyable. I appreciated the use of Alex DeLarge as both the main character and the narrator. It made for an interesting connection with him and led to a relationship that I found riddling at times. Near the end of the movie I became slightly annoyed by Kubrick's constant spoon-feeding of the movie's message. However, I caught onto another message that I do not think they meant to imply. At the end of the movie where everyone is getting payback on Alex for being the ass he was in the beginning, they stumbled upon the overall hypocrisy of society. People responded to his presence with "ultra-violence" even after his complete reformation, thus causing him to resort back to his old, violent, ways. If they had allowed bygones to be bygones, he would have remained a reformed and non-violent person.

On a more personal note, the first edition of me and my father's podcast, Convince Me, is going up tomorrow Sunday, May 1st. It will be going live at 10:45 PM EST, and the recording will also be available for listening at http://www.talkshoe.com/tc/9791
We will be talking about Body Modification. So please, listen in, and call in live if you get the chance! To clarify, both the live and listenable versions of the podcast will be available at the above link.

As always I fully encourage any criticism, advice, suggestions, or general discussion in the comment area.
If you wish you can contact me at thecynicalreport@gmail.com, and please like/share the blog on Facebook and Twitter using the links on the side!

His Name Was Kameron

2011-04-28T13:05:00.001-04:00

Hello everyone, I am the aforementioned Kameron. I have been really nervous about my first post, and as such, I have been putting it off quite a bit up until this point. I didn't know what to do for this post, but I think for now I will just let you guys know about me and what I am about, and maybe a bit about where this blog will be going in the future, assuming I can figure it out for myself.

As far as my life experiences go, I must admit that I am still a bit limited in this area, perhaps a bit too much. This is part of the reason I am starting this blog, so I can get myself out there as a writer and a person, and hopefully get to know some of you in return. I am currently a starving college student. I live with my mom and dad at this time, but I have lived out on my own in Dallas before deciding to come back to Michigan to further my education. We own three birds and a chinchilla, which I will most likely talk more about in a future post.

I am extremely interested in film, books, music, and video games. I used to play a little game called World of Warcraft quite a bit, but I have recently tapered off on that in pursuit of school and writing. As far as movies and music go, there are way too many favorites for me to list them all here in this post, but perhaps if you guy's wish, that could always be a future post. The same generally goes for books, although a couple of my all time favorite books have to be Lord of The Rings (a collective sigh of "of course" is heard around the world) and The Book Thief.

I am starting this blog because, for one, I believe it will be a great way to keep me writing during my time away from school. I also will enjoy the opportunity to write something aside from purely academic ventures. Thirdly, there are a lot of opportunities on this here internet, and I feel like this could be a good jumping off spot for me to get involved in some communities around the web. And, because I always intend on being honest with you guys (which I realize that at this point, there are no "you guys" reading this) I do hope that the content I post is quality enough for me to consider monetizing it a little bit. These are hard economic times, as we all know, and specifically where I live it is extremely difficult to find a job. Especially for those of us who have no interest in becoming mindless drones. So obviously, if this can at all help me get through college or any such thing, that would be the best case scenario. We will see. Hopefully at some point, I would love to start making some videos for you guys, and I also currently have a podcast in the works.

As far as the content that will be available on this blog in the near future, I really want to give my insight on some news that matters to me (and should matter to most everyone else). I also intend to, perhaps less commonly due to money restraints, review books, games, movies, and music with my little spin. All of this is up in the air at this point, because when I read over that it seems like it could get a little dry. Of course I fully intend to mix a good bit of myself in here and there. I hope to post at least once a week, and ideally a good bit more than that if things work out the way I hope they will. I am open to any advice though and I encourage you to give suggestions as you see fit!

Unless something comes up I think would be good to post about before hand, my first real post will be about A Clockwork Orange, just to kick things off. I have never seen this film before, but it has always been on my list of must sees. It should be a good one.

I fully encourage any criticism, advice, suggestions, or general discussion in the comment area.
And if you wish you can contact me at thecynicalreport@gmail.com and like/share the blog on Facebook and Twitter using the links on the side!