Well, I’ve decided to put a stop to this, and I’ll be dedicating this particular blog post to some of the techniques I’ve been using to stop emotionally beating myself up.

Give yourself a break
If you regularly beat yourself up about things that you perceive as mistakes or failures on your part then you’re probably a bit of a perfectionist by nature. This is certainly true with me. What I’ve found helpful is to try to view the situation from someone else’s viewpoint and ask yourself whether they would be as critical of you as you are being.

Perhaps they might say to you that not everyone’s perfect and mistakes happen; we all lose our way sometimes. Perhaps they might not see your ‘failings’ as such a big deal and would cut you some slack. Or look at it this way: if your best friend was upset with themselves for having a junk food binge would you criticise them for their lack of willpower and call them weak? Not if you’re a good friend. So start out by being a good friend to yourself and give yourself a break.

Address the problem
Constantly berating yourself for your mistakes isn’t going to help the situation – it’s just going to make you feel worse about yourself and most likely more resigned to failure in the future. Instead, try to think about what steps you can take to address the problem.

If you made an error at work, come up with an action plan for how you can prevent that error happening again – perhaps talk it over with your boss or a colleague to get some advice. If you’re angry at yourself for not sticking to your exercise regime, enlist a friend to join you and encourage you to keep it up.

Take small positive steps towards fixing the problem and you will immediately feel better because you’re progressing towards change rather than being stuck in a negative state.

Focus on the good things
You may have noticed from previous postings on the Daily Mind that I’m a big fan of making lists. I think it’s a great way of focusing the mind and encouraging you to take action.

Think back over the past few weeks and months and list 10 positive achievements that you accomplished. No matter how big or small the achievement, make a note of it, and then pin the list on your wall or somewhere where you can see it easily. Why not add in some pictures to illustrate the points? If you ran a marathon, put up a picture of you on the day.

If you got a pay rise at work, put up a picture of some money. This will help to trigger happy, positive memories of your achievements and remind you that you don’t deserve to keep beating yourself up because you can do good things.

Use a mind mantra
Finally, a very simple but effective way to stop being so hard on yourself is to start repeating a positive affirmation or mantra on a regular basis. My particular favourite, which I learnt from self-help guru Louise Hay, is: “I love and approve of myself.”

Repeat this affirmation constantly throughout your day and write it down somewhere that you can see it regularly – perhaps on your phone or on a post-it note by your mirror.

Pretty soon I can guarantee that these words will sink in and you will stop being so hard on yourself.

About the author: Liz Parry is a writer specialising in holistic health and wellbeing, personal development and spirituality. Follow her on Twitter and Google+

For some, going away on dedicated retreats is the best way to find focus amidst a busy life. And even those who are more centred than others can benefit from going on a retreat. After all, being away from one’s hectic routine and simply taking the time to reflect and meditate is beneficial to anyone.

Whether you are based in Australia or you’re there for a trip, visiting an Australian retreat centre is one of the best gifts that you can give yourself. The good news is that there are many retreat centres around the country, so the chances are that you will find one that is easy to get to.

Here are some reputable Australian retreat centres which you can consider to help you find that focus. And, even if you are not a resident, and you do not have your own means of getting around, there is no need to worry. You can ask local contacts to drive you, or you can always check sites which allow you to compare car rental deals so you don’t have to deal with additional stress.

Bodhi Tree Retreat Centre
This retreat is located at 78 Bentley Road, Tullera, NSW. It follows the Theravada tradition and runs retreats nine months in a year. The accommodations are very basic, following the dormitory style. All meals are vegetarian, and the kitchen is shared. They do not charge fixed fees, but you are encouraged to donate as much as you want.

Julatten Mountain Spa Retreat
The Julatten Mountain Spa Retreat is a non-faith based retreat location found in 27 English Road, Julatten, QLD. The setting is a lush rainforest, which will certainly soothe your soul. Accommodations are private eco-friendly cabins.

Mangrove Yoga Ashram
This ashram will probably require you to get a car of your own as it is one of the more remote centres. About 90 minutes from Sydney, you will find Mangrove Yoga Ashram at 300 Mangrove Creek Road, Mangrove Creek, NSW. The ashram holds the distinction of being the oldest and largest residential yoga centre south of the hemisphere, and people really do go to great lengths to visit. One distinctive feature of the ashram is that it welcomes families and children as well.

Tarkira Tree Rainforest Retreat and Healing Therapies
Adjacent to the Tarra Bulga National Park, the Tarkira Tree Rainforest Retreat offers highly personalised retreats for individuals or couples. More than specific programs to help you focus and re-energise, you can also simply take in what nature has to offer. The retreat is found at 1990 Tarra Valley Rd, Tarra Valley, VIC.

Image via premasagar

So this month I’ve decided to try and change this, by making a resolution to always start my day on a good note. And so far the changes I’ve been making have been making a real difference to my state of mind, leaving me feeling happier and more upbeat. I thought I’d share them with you now.

Uplifting music
I’ve put together a playlist of upbeat, uplifting songs that I always play first thing in the morning, on random shuffle. My particular favourite on this list is Nina Simone’s Feeling Good. Whenever I hear this, as I’m getting ready to go about my day, I always feel a bit more positive. I think the lyrics are just as important as the tunes. Why not go through your music collection and set up a special morning playlist full of the tunes that make you feel good?

Having a healthy breakfast
I always make time for breakfast because, as they say, it’s the most important meal of the day. A healthy breakfast is essential to maintain consistent energy levels and balanced blood sugar levels. Bad breakfast choices can result in problems such as sugar cravings, brain fog and fatigue.

Porridge or low sugar cereals, made with complex carbohydrates such as brown rice, quinoa, oats, rye, spelt flakes and millet are a healthy choice. Rye or spelt breads are a better choice than refined wheat as they’ll help to keep hunger at bay until lunchtime and provide you with consistent, slow energy release, keeping your blood sugar levels on an even keel.

Positive affirmations
I’m a big fan of affirmations, which are basically statements we make to ourselves that can be either positive or negative. If you constantly find yourself making negative statements in your mind then it goes without saying that you’re going to go through life feeling pessimistic and always looking for something to go wrong. However, if you can turn these negative statements into something more positive, your mindset will gradually start to change.

I think this practice is crucial to put in place in the morning as it sets the tone of your whole day. Rather than waking up wondering what’s going to go wrong, why not begin by telling yourself that it’s going to be a good day?

You could go one step further and write some statements or affirmations along these lines and place them around your house to remind you to think this way. Perhaps put one on your bathroom mirror or your breakfast cupboard door. Suggestions could include: “Today is a great day!” or “I am looking forward to what today will bring.”

Exercise
Lastly, try to fit in some exercise at the start of your day. Just 10 minutes will make all the difference, as it will get your blood pumping and will help you to feel alert and ready to go. Yoga is a nice, easy way to start your day.

Sun salutations are a series of postures designed to increase flexibility, tone, and strengthen the muscles. They are also particularly good for helping to energise the mind and body. Start off by doing one set a day and gradually increase the repetitions to about five or 10. You’re sure to feel more alert and refreshed!

About the author: Liz Parry is a writer specialising in holistic health and wellbeing, personal development and spirituality. Follow her on Twitter and Google+

Homeowners, when given the chance to remodel their homes should consider doing it in relation to green living.  Remodeling entails cost but it would be worth it if the home can be improved in such a way that there is an expected return in investment in terms of comfort, future savings, and responsibility to the environment.  Contrary to the common belief that it is hard to achieve a green home, there are actually very simple modifications that may be done in a home to achieve the purpose.

Having a green home is not merely going with a trend.  It involves a comprehensive overhaul of homeowner’s views so that they can easily adapt and incorporate green living concepts in everyday living.  It is about making a home a healthier place to live in, and making the home more comfortable and energy-efficient.  Select home remodeling efforts can result to better indoor air quality, energy and resource conservation, less wastage of materials, and opting for products that are considered beneficial to people and the environment.

Based on the recommendations of green advocates, a green home is founded on choosing the green option in all aspects including the use of non-toxic paints and sealants, programmable thermostats, energy-efficient appliances, natural flooring, energy-efficient lighting, tank-less water heaters, local building materials, native plants for landscaping, and many other specific ways that may be applicable to a home.

Living in an ideal home is essentially about being free from the worries of exorbitant energy costs, harmful construction elements, and wastage of anything that can be put to better use.  Not many homeowners are aware that those seemingly minor inconveniences spotted in a home can actually pose a threat to the health of the occupants and the integrity of the home structure, not to mention hard on the pockets.

Molds and other allergens may be conveniently living in homes due to water intrusion, excess moisture, or condensation.  An HVAC system that is not efficiently functioning can result to annoying random spots in the house which can either be too hot or too cold.  Proper and sufficient insulation is really a must if a homeowner is to achieve  an energy-efficient home.  PA Electricity Companies provide some tips in their website for the information of the public.

Any modification from the smallest to the biggest effort will contribute greatly to the attainment of a truly green home.  Once the difference between houses which have not benefited from any green-living modification and those that have been remodeled to comply with green living is experienced, homeowners will never want to go back to non-green living.

About the Author

Shirley discovered that a green home is actually attainable after having some minor modifications done in her home.

Image: ecoinstitution.com

Make a list
Start off by making a list of ways in which you lack confidence. This could include things like blaming yourself when you make a mistake, focusing on your failings, avoiding certain things because you think you’ll only fail, craving approval from others, having difficulty making decisions or thinking that others are more important than you. Then, go through each item on the list and write down how you could change this behaviour. Or come up with a positive affirmation to repeat to yourself on a daily basis – for example, “I believe in myself”.

Walk tall
Our posture has a direct effect on how we feel, so learn to walk tall and you’ll instantly feel better. Push back your shoulders, lift your chin and hold your head high. An osteopath once told me this trick: imagine that there’s a balloon on a string above your head and visualize it pulling you upwards. If you feel your posture sagging a bit, imagine that balloon tugging you upwards again.

You may not feel like smiling, but have a go at faking it and you will find that the act of smiling actually helps to make you feel better and more confident – it’s kind of tricking your mind into feeling more positive. What’s more, you’ll find that people respond to you in a positive way and in turn it will make you feel better about yourself.

Focus on the positives
The following NLP technique should help to boost your confidence by drawing on past, positive experiences. Start by thinking about something you have done in the past that made you feel good about yourself. It could be the day you landed a job you wanted, or the day you passed your driving licence – or perhaps a time when someone gave you a wonderful compliment. Conjure up the moment in your mind and make it as vivid as possible. Then place your thumb and forefinger together – this is called making an ‘anchor’.

Next, think of another experience in your life where you felt confident and successful, and again make an anchor by pressing your thumb and forefinger together as you think of the memory. Then do this for a third time. Afterwards, relax, take a deep breath and press your thumb and forefinger together. You should feel those confident, positive feelings returning as you make the anchor. In future, when you need a confidence boost, just make the anchor and you should instantly feel those feelings returning.

Switch your focus
When people lack confidence they tend to focus too much on themselves and their shortcomings. Next time you are in a social situation and you feel unconfident, try focusing on other people instead of yourself. Make a real effort to listen to what other people are saying and try to place yourself in their shoes, without judging. You’ll find that by focusing less on yourself you will feel better about yourself and generally more confident.

Another thing you could do is to mentally rehearse how a situation is going to go, before you go into it. Run through in your mind a positive outcome whereby you are feeling and acting confident. The key is to really experience it in your mind, as if you are looking through the eyes of your confident self. Just doing this for a few minutes each day can really help to give you a boost.

Good luck!

About the author: Liz Parry is a writer specialising in holistic health and wellbeing, personal development and spirituality. Follow her on Twitter and Google+

For people with disabilities, particularly the amputees, the miracle they can gain can come from the power of the mirror. It’s been proven that through this basic household item, people who no longer have complete limbs can still lead a quality life.

Stevo, an amputee himself, has been on a humanitarian mission traveling to different countries to help the underprivileged amputees. His goal is to ease the phantom limb pain these amputees often experience and help them cope with the depression they may be facing as a result of their condition.

But instead of using drugs or any other form of alternative medicine, Stevo uses the magic of mirrors. This unique kind of therapy uses acrylic mirrors that are hand-made using local materials. It is very cost effective because apart from the absence of drugs, patients need not visit doctors or clinics or travel to the town centers. Stevo himself fabricates the mirrors that are of two lengths – one for the arm amputees and the other for the leg amputees.

This mirror therapy is done by allowing patients to view a mirror image of his limb in place of the one that was amputated. By constantly letting them do this, the brain then starts to re-wire and stops giving warning signals that normally causes the pain. Ideally, this visualization technique needs to be done at least twice every day for up to five weeks in order for the patient to be healed throughout his lifetime.

The use of mirrors as a healing aid was developed by one of the world’s top neuroscientists, VS Ramachandran, back in the 1990s. It has been proven effective for more than 15 years now and is, in fact, also being practiced by the U.S. Military, the American Automobile Association and the American Pain Foundation. Interestingly, the technique has also been found to treat other conditions including stroke, paralysis, different nerve disorders and complex regional pain syndrome.

Thanks to Stevo and his campaign, poor amputees who may feel hopeless and frustrated about their situation can now look forward to leading a quality life. Donations can still be given until February 15 after which Stevo will embark on his next mission of bringing acrylic mirrors via his cargo bicycle. His goal is to collect $5,000 that would enable him to provide mirrors for the next three months until May.

Stevo is currently running a crowd fund raising campaign at StartSomeGood.com, he needs to reach the target of $5,000 for all the money to go to helping people in Cambodia who have lost limbs. Please give what you can.

About the author:
Teresa is a freelance blogger and mom of two who gets inspiration from the success stories of people helping other people.

By breathing properly we are giving our brain and other vital organs the right amount of oxygen and essential nutrients they need to function optimally. However, things such as stress, anxiety and poor posture can change the way in which we breathe.

When we are stressed we take short, sharp breaths only using the top third of our lungs. This is known as chest breathing. With this type of breathing we never fully empty the waste products from the deep recesses of our lungs where they accumulate. Breathing from the diaphragm, on the other hand, massages the abdominal organs, helps blood to pump through them and enables waste to move through the intestines.

Here are some breathing techniques you might want to try:

Diaphragmatic breathing
Place one hand on your chest and the other on your abdomen. As you inhale the hand on your abdomen should rise higher than the one on your chest. This ensures that the diaphragm is drawing air into the base of your lungs. Exhale through your mouth and then take a slow, deep breath in through your nose and hold it for a count of seven. Then exhale slowly through your mouth for a count of eight. As you do this, gently contract your abdominal muscles to completely expel all the air from your lungs. Repeat this exercise four more times.

Alternate nostril breathing
Also known as Nadi Shodhana, this is a yogic breathing exercise which helps to ease anxiety and tension and may even help if you suffer with insomnia. Begin by sitting in a comfortable, upright position. Raise your right hand to your face and place the tip of your index finger and middle finger between your eyebrows with your ring finger and little finger on your left nostril and your thumb on your right nostril. Using your thumb, close your right nostril and gently exhale through your left nostril. Then, inhale through your left nostril and close it using your ring finger and little finger. Remove your right thumb from your right nostril and exhale through your right nostril. Next, breathe in through your right nostril, close it using your thumb, remove your ring finger and little finger from you left nostril and exhale from the left. This is one round of alternate nostril breathing. Repeat the exercise for nine rounds. I find this to be particularly soothing as it sends the mind into an almost hypnotic state. I can see why it is said to help with insomnia.

Ujjayi breathing
Also known as the Ocean breath, this is a yogic breathing exercise which is known for the soft hissing sound you make when you practise it. Ujjayi breathing increases oxygen intake, slows the breath and helps to increase energy so is particularly good if you are feeling fatigued or sluggish. Begin by inhaling and exhaling deeply through the mouth. As you exhale, slightly constrict the passage of air as if you are fogging up a mirror. As you become used to this, begin to apply the same technique to the in-breaths. When you are able to control the throat on both the inhale and the exhale, close your mouth and begin breathing through your nose using the same technique.

I hope you find these breathing techniques useful. They may take quite a bit of practice, but you can be assured that they will benefit your health and wellbeing.

About the author: Liz Parry is a writer specialising in holistic health and wellbeing, personal development and spirituality. Follow her on Twitter and Google+

Help the homeless
Many people aren’t keen on giving money to homeless people in the street, but a simple way that you can help this Christmas is by donating toiletries or clothes to your local homeless shelter. A lot of shelters desperately need things like this and for a minimal cost you’ll be making a real difference.  Alternatively, if you have a few hours spare over the Christmas period, why not offer to help out at your local soup kitchen? Instead of vegging in front of the TV eating mince pies, it will get you out of the house and do some good at the same time!

Ask for charitable gifts
I don’t know about you but every year I end up with several presents that I know I’m never going to use and which often end up getting taken to the charity shop. This year I’ve asked friends and family to either make a donation to charity instead of buying me a gift, or to get me a charity gift like mosquito nets or a food basket for an impoverished family. You might want to consider doing this for your own friends and family – you could even choose appropriate types of gift for them. For example, if a friend is a teacher, you could buy them the gift of a place for a child in school, whilst a nurse or doctor friend might appreciate a gift of medical supplies for a family in a disaster zone. It gives you the chance to be a little bit creative.

Think about the environment
Christmas these days is all about rampant commercialism, but it doesn’t necessarily have to be that way! Instead of buying your Christmas food at the local supermarket, where your food may have travelled for miles to get there, causing a big carbon footprint, why not be a bit more eco friendly and support local businesses such as your green grocer, health food shop or farm shop? As an added note, foods that have been grown locally will be better for you as they will be more ripe and fresh. And be sure to think of the planet by recycling your Christmas cards and wrapping paper. There are often schemes whereby used stamps can be collected and used by charities to raise money.

Think of your neighbours
Not everyone has a family or friends to spend Christmas with, meaning that it can be a lonely time for some people. If you have elderly neighbours who live alone, why not show them that you are thinking of them by sending them a Christmas card or giving them a small gift of a mince pie or two? If you have some spare time you could even offer to pop in for a chat. It won’t cost you anything but could mean the world to a lonely, elderly neighbour.

If you have any further suggestions for charitable things to do at Christmas then why not add your comments here? I’d love to hear your suggestions. Merry Christmas!

About the author: Liz Parry is a writer specialising in holistic health and wellbeing, personal development and spirituality. Follow her on Twitter and Google+

Helping others
Social work is a humanitarian role so if you have a deep desire to help others then it’s certainly an avenue worth pursuing. Social workers provide much needed help and support for individuals who are left vulnerable to changes within society.

The kinds of people they work with include vulnerable children who may be in need of foster care, adoption or child protection, the elderly, people with mental health needs, those with physical and learning disabilities, young offenders, people suffering from alcohol and substance abuse issues, the homeless and victims of domestic violence. These are tough issues to deal with, but the rewards are great.

The role of a social worker is absolutely vital in helping to improve the lives of those who are vulnerable or less fortunate, enabling them to become happy, functioning, successful members of society. If you have empathy, care about others and want to make a difference to the world we live in, then this could be the career for you.

Helping the community
The role of a social worker is very varied and generally people embarking on this career choose to specialize in either children’s or adult’s services. Social workers work for a wide range of organizations, from hospitals, mental health trusts and community or youth centres to detention centres and charities.

Social workers form relationships with people and help them to find solutions to their problems as well as ways to live more successfully within their local community. Not only do they work with individual clients, but they also work with their families, friends and organizations such as the local authority, the police and schools. Social workers help to improve their local community and the results of their work can be seen in every neighbourhood.

Personal qualities
Social work isn’t going to be the right career for everyone, and certain personal qualities are necessary, such as:

• Patience and the ability to remain calm in a crisis
• Resilience
• Having the flexibility to adapt to new roles, tasks and situations
• The ability to work on your own initiative
• Strong observation, analytical and listening skills
• The capacity to absorb legal/procedural information
• The ability to negotiate/mediate/interpret on behalf of others
• Empathy and a desire to improve the quality of the lives of others
• The ability to think on your feet and make difficult decisions under pressure

How to go about it
If this sounds like the career for you, it’s essential to get the right training. The minimum entry level requirement is a bachelor’s degree in social work, but the Masters in Social Work (MSW) has become the standard entry requirement for most positions. Do some research on the internet to find the course that’s right for you.

If you can’t give up work to study full-time, then you might want to consider an online course like MSW online. A qualification like this can help you obtain social work licensure, help advance your career and create a positive and lasting impact on others. Good luck!

About the author: Liz Parry is a writer specialising in holistic health and wellbeing, personal development and spirituality. Follow her on Twitter and Google+

The term used for winter time depression is Seasonal Affective Disorder (or SAD) and according to research, 5% of Americans and 7% of Brits are thought to suffer with the condition. Symptoms range from sleep problems and mood swings to lethargy, fatigue and depression.

The theory behind Seasonal Affective Disorder is that the lack of sunlight during the winter months affects the nerve centres in our brains which control our daily rhythms and moods. If you experience this condition each year then the good news is that there are several things you can do help your symptoms.

Top up on vitamin D
Research has shown that SAD symptoms may be linked to low levels of vitamin D, which the body normally produces in response to exposure to sunlight. A clinical trial carried out at a teaching hospital in Baltimore studied the effects of vitamin D on people with SAD and the results showed an improvement in all the subjects. It’s difficult to get the required amount of vitamin D we need from food, but high strength vitamin D3 supplements may help during the winter months.

Get your omega-3s
The omega-3 fatty acids found in oily fish, such as salmon, mackerel and sardines, are reportedly good for warding off depression and improving low mood and poor concentration. If you’re a vegetarian, or just not a fan of fish, then you can up your intake through eating more flax seeds and walnuts or by taking a good quality omega-3 supplement.

See the light
A lack of light causes an increase in the body’s production of melatonin (the hormone that makes us feel sleepy) and brings about a reduction in serotonin (the brain’s feelgood chemical). Light therapy can be effective in reversing this process and alleviating the symptoms of SAD. The therapy involves exposure to very bright light – at least 10 times the intensity of ordinary domestic lighting – for up to four hours a day. You can buy special lightboxes which sit on your desk (indeed I have one right by me as I write this) as well as alarm clocks that wake you up gradually with an increasing amount of light. All you need to do is sit two to three feet away from the box, allowing the light to shine directly through your eyes.

Use your mind
I’m a big believer in the power of the mind, so here’s a visualization exercise that you might want to try, to boost your spirits during these cold, dark days. Close your eyes and focus on your breathing. Draw your attention to your belly and imagine that there is a ball of warmth and heat inside you – a bit like the sun. Each time you breathe in and out, imagine that this ‘sun’ is radiating heat and warmth throughout your body. As your breathing gets deeper imagine the sun’s rays radiating out to your fingertips, down to your toes and out through the crown of your head. Visualise your whole body glowing with warmth and radiance. Stay with this image for a few minutes before bringing your awareness back to the present.

Say it with flowers!
If you’re looking for a natural way to boost your mood then you might want to try Bach Flower Remedies. These work naturally to lift your mood and energy levels, increasing wellbeing without the side effects of prescribed drugs. Each of the remedies has been prepared from flowers of wild plants, trees and bushes so you couldn’t get more natural! The remedies Gorse and Mustard are said to help counteract low mood whilst boosting energy levels. Olive or Hornbeam may help to increase motivation. Simply add a couple of drops to a glass of water or drip them directly on to your tongue.

I hope these suggestions keep you going throughout the winter time and help to beat the blues. It won’t be long till summer’s here again!

About the author: Liz Parry is a writer specialising in holistic health and wellbeing, personal development and spirituality. Follow her on Twitter and Google+