The Deeper End of Chaos

My Guitar

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 21:11:00 +0000

I got my guitar from my great-grandfather when I was 8 or 9. It was said that in his younger days, Gramps could pick up any instrument and play it, give him a few minutes and he could play it well. I don't know about that, he was well past his prime when I knew him.

But he had this guitar stuck in the back of his closet for I don't know how long. I knew it was old, I always assumed it was very old. I've had it for over 30 years, I didn't know how long before that Gramps had it.

I took it out today to play it. I haven't played in years, and I miss it. I'm having a good day so I thought I'd give it a go. I'm amazingly rusty and the weakness in my left hand makes it hard to make chords, but I'm working on it.

I had my laptop handy, so I thought I'd look it up. It took a little bit, but I tracked it down.

Silvertone World - Acoustic Guitars - 1950s 1960s - Model 608 / 604 / 1204 (view on Google Sidewiki)

It's not as old as I thought it was, but still a great guitar from a great company. I like to imagine Gramps ordering it from the Sears catalog and sitting with Granny when they were younger (at least a little younger than I remember them) and serenading her.

Truly keeping me up tonight.

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 06:08:00 +0000

It's almost midnight on Sunday, but I saw something on the local news that really got my brain going. A little later I was talking to a friend on the same subject and it's really bouncing around in the space between my ears. Here's the sitch:

(I really wanted to give you a link to the story, but the station I saw it on does not have any trace of the story on their website. Here's a link to the same story from an Arizona station.)

A neo-Nazi group "put on" a march in Phoenix protesting illegal immigration. Most of the video shown on my local station was muted, so I don't really know exactly what was being said. There was one quote that they played that got my brain going. I will paraphrase: "Just because we are a white group, people are calling us racist. They can come out here for Black pride and Brown pride, but we come out here for White pride and we're racist."

Normally I would just ignore anything like this. This is America, they are entitled to their opinion, and to express it, so God Bless America. I don't agree, and I don't have to, so God Bless America.

But it got me thinking.

Technically, I am "white". I rarely think about my "race" unless I am confronted with it on a driver's license application or a medical form, and normally I don't give it a second thought, I just check the box and go on. But do I define myself that way in my head? No. I don't. In my mind and my heart I am not "white". My ancestry is Danish, Irish, German, and I don't know what else. I am a product of the Great American Melting Pot. I'm a mutt. But over all, I am American. (I know for medical conditions there are times that doctors just want to know "white" or "African-American", I understand the reasons for that, but in my inner being that is not how I think of "me".)

But the neo-nazi guy had a point. When a bunch of middle age "white" guys gets together for any purpose, and they intentionally or unintentionally exclude "minorities" (which is a funny term to use in this situation because middle-age white guys have been a minority for some time now) they are automatically assumed to be racist, even before it's known what they call themselves or what their purpose is.

But there is a reason for this. Like it or not, for much of American history, "white" guys have been racist. I'm not talking individually, but over the course of the history of this country, "we", the average white guys, have been the oppressors. I don't like it, but it's true. From the moment our founding fathers chose not to make a choice on slavery (until much further along), to the policies enforced by our military in regards to those we call "Native Americans", we were the racists. I think there are those who have a right to be nervous whenever they see a bunch of us together.

We are a long way from Martin Luther King, Jr.'s dream. A long way from "... that day when all of God's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual:Free at last! Free at last! Thank God Almighty, we are free at last!*"

I don't know why that is. I don't know why there is still an "us" and "them"; why we still have "red and yellow, black and white". When are we going to just be Americans? There are so many other things that we can fight over, that are WORTH fighting over, why must the shade of melanin in our epidermis continue to be an issue? To anyone?

------------
*as transcribed at http://www.americanrhetoric.com/speeches/mlkihaveadream.htm

one of those times

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 03:40:00 +0000

Today is one of those days where I am so overwhelmed by what is going on in the world around me that I am unable to put anything in to words. Too many people with too many opinions have already said too much and it's to the point where no one really knows, or seems to care, what the truth is. Things that seem to make perfect sense to the people that are directly affected don't seem to matter to people who have nothing to do with the end results, but they are bigger, louder, and better organized and all they really care about is what they want instead of what is right.

So there is no point is in me adding my voice to any of it. At least not today.

U2 I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For - Live from the Rose Bowl

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 17:11:00 +0000

Only U2 could be this ugly and still pack in stadiums like this. Been a fan for 25 years, since before they were cool, and they're still the best band ever.

What defines a "basic need"?

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 15:32:00 +0000

I heard a story on an NPR podcast the other day about the economic impact the recession has had on the Navajo reservation. Since the story is about my back yard (literally, the reservation border is *right over there*) I took special notice.

The reporter began by describing normal conditions. "On the reservation many people don't have running water," she began, "indoor toilets, some don't have electricity, cell phone service is spotty at best, non-existent in some areas. The Navajo people have lived without these basic needs, even in good times..."

Wait, whoa, hold on, back up. Cell phone service is now considered a "basic need" along with electricity and water? When did that happen?

The story went on to describe how many people have reverted to the barter system to meet their needs and they're doing pretty good and yadda yadda yadda. It was really kind of a puff piece that didn't present any real information. But that one line totally threw me off.

From a global perspective, many people are "worse" off than the Navajo people. Some don't have access to clean water at all, some still live very "primitive" lives in mud houses. Obviously, the writer of the NPR story was writing from an American-centric point of view.

Now, that being said, the Navajo reservation is "in" America (actually, it's a sovereign nation that is surrounded by American soil) and it's hard to think of anyplace "in" America where there is no plumbing and no electricity. But should cell phone service really be considered a basic need? Have we become so techno-dependent that we've come to think of cell-phone coverage as a basic need along with water?

I don't have a cell phone. I haven't had one since I was working. Even then, I had one of those "pay as you go" plans and very rarely talked on it. I only needed it to be reachable by my employees. I did not, and still don't, consider a cell phone a necessity. I barely consider my land-line a necessity.

I guess my point is that here in the United States, some people have developed a very skewed view of what they need to "get by". In these hard economic times, we all need to step back and look at what truly is a necessity and what is a luxury. And what about your neighbor? Is your neighbor doing without groceries while you are writing the check for your "basic need" of cable television? Is that guy across the street suffering without an important medication while you are driving around in your "basic need" of a Lexus?

What are your basic needs?

Geek-o-lantern

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 01:34:00 +0000

Captain! It's the Enterprise!

Why Halloween is Bad. Or not. Is it?

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 20:51:00 +0000

I don't know why people are asking this, but they do. "Is Halloween "evil"? Should I, as a God-fearing person, allow my children to participate in a "holiday" started by "Satan"?

I did some research (someone else has summarized it nicely here). I discovered, to my surprise, that Halloween, as we celebrate it today with food and costumes actually has CHRISTIAN origins. The early church, as they have done with other "holy" days, such as Christmas and Easter, chose November first as "All hallowed Day" or "All Saints day" - a celebration that was intended to lure pagans away from their own celebrations that day (varying accounts will say things about "day of the dead" and "samhain", but I couldn't nail down anything definitive).

The day before came to be known as "All hallow's eve" and thus "hallow's eve" and slang-ified into "Halloween". The wearing of costumes and sharing food was claimed to keep the "bad spirits" away so that "All Saints day" would be a fully holy day.

At least that's what's I've pieced together from many conflicting accounts.

So why not? As it is celebrated today in America, it has nothing to do with the church or "pagan" or anything like that. It's all a big financial boost for the candy companies.

This is just another thing that Christians have allowed to become a distraction. Recently I've posted about the "Evolution/Creation debate" and "Why won't God heal amputees", this is just another one of those things that really has no point in being argued about.

Instead of worrying about how "bad" a children's event is, why don't yo worry about how "bad" you are? While you're worrying about trick or treating and getting candy are you more worried about people that don't even have food? While you're worrying about whether wearing a costume is bad, are you more worried about people that have no clothes?

"'For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.' Then they also will answer, saying, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?' Then he will answer them, saying, 'Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me.'" -Matthew 25:42-45 (English Standard Version)

The Importance of the Evolution/Creation Debate

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 14:08:00 +0000

or

Disclaimer: The title of this post is sarcastic. Just so you know before you send me hate email.

I'm surprised I haven't blogged about this topic before. That's probably a good thing, because if I had written something two years ago, I'd probably be reading it now going "what the heck was I thinking?"

Anyway, every once in a while a topic kind of hits me from all sides and I am compelled to write about it. This time around it's evolution. A couple of friends of mine, unbeknownst to each other had simultaneously sent a twitter on the topic of evolution. At the same time my lovely wife was sharing the paper she was writing on Darwin. When something gets into your brain from three different angles, it's hard not to have it rattle around for a while. It did, and now I have to write about it. Really, I have to, sorry.

Over the course of the last 10 years or so, my beliefs and opinions of the matter of Evolution vs. Creation have varied widely. At one time or another I would have called myself a Creationist, a non-Darwinist, an anti-Evolutionist, a Seeker, a Quesitoner, a Dumb-ass, and Apathetic (on the subject of Creation v. Evolution). That's pretty much where I am now, I really don't care.

I used to think this was a very important topic. I am a Christian, I believe in One True God. I believe this God created the Heavens and the Earth. As such, at one time, I thought it was very important to make sure everyone understood that the theory of evolution has problems and that everyone should believe in a creationist model of the development of the universe. Man, was I dumb.

Does that mean I'm an evolutionist now? No, not really. I went to school for many years, I am very and almost intimately familiar with the writings of Darwin (less so with the theories that others developed from his works, but with the basics). I respect Darwin. But I'm not really an evolutionist either.

As i said, I'm Apathetic on the subject. I really don't care any more. Why? Because the debate is pointless. It's a distraction. You can argue one side or the other with varying degrees of success, but in the end it doesn't really matter. Why? Because until Dr. Emmet Brown perfects the Flux Capacitor and installs it in that DeLorean, we can't go back in time and really see what happened.

But the bigger problem is this: if we are putting time and energy into a debate that neither side can conclusively win, what are we NOT putting our time and energy into?

As Christians, here's our answer:

Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world. - James 1:27 (ESV)

What does this say? Our religion, our habits relating to God, should be to take care of people and keep your butt out of the smut.

What does this not say? It does not say that our mission is to make sure that everyone believes that Darwin was wrong and to spend hours in debates and arguments that make us look like fools.

The Creation/Evolution debate is a distraction, another one of those questions designed to make both sides look like fools and to keep us all from the real point. Christian or atheist, I think we can agree on one thing: taking care of people in need is a good thing to do. The difference is, the atheist doesn't have a God that tells him he is supposed to be doing it, yet he does it anyway.

So let's file this one with "Why won't God heal amputees?" as one of those arguments that distracts us from what we should all be doing: taking care of each other. Let's put away pointless and petty squabbles and actually do something that makes people go "what is it about you that makes you the great person that you are?" instead of "what is it about you that makes you the dumb ignorant person that you are?"

a new template

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 18:04:00 +0000

I tried to build my own template for this blog. I'm not sure I'm happy with it, but I'm posting to see how a new post is handled. What do you think?

A Small Town Memory

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 23:25:00 +0000

I knew every inch of the walk from the front door to the post office. I walked it every day, sometimes twice a day, hoping to get something from someone.

6 steps from the door to the sidewalk, turn left. 7 more steps and I was at the edge of our property. I never knew why but the sidewalk on our side of the line was in much better shape than our neighbors, though both were obviously decades ancient.

Stepping onto the broken, discolored chunks of concrete was like stepping into a fairy tale. Our neighbor, Mr. Hrdlicka? Mr. Slepitka? I don't think I was ever told his name. He had great huge evergreen trees of some kind growing on either side of the sidewalk. They too seemed ancient, their branches entwining, hanging low, their brown needles making a carpet that covered the broken sidewalk. It always seemed darker, colder, under those threes.

12 steps and I was out from under the canopy and at the corner. Years later, after I had graduated and moved on, these roads would be paved, but now they were dirt and gravel. There were only a few stop signs in town, all of them on the street that ran in front of the school.The next block over from where I was. On a hot day I would pray that a car wouldn't come by, spewing dust behind it that stuck to your skin in the humid Nebraska summers.

7 steps across the dirt road. The next block didn't have many trees. There was no sidewalk in front of the house on the corner, but a well worn path in the grass. It was about two inches lower than the grass on either side and was always dry and hard, even in the rain.

I never learned the names of the people that lived in all these homes, but in the comings and goings of life I couldn't help but learn some of them. The next house, 15 steps from the corner, was where one of my classmates lived. Everyone called him Bert, though teachers and parents called him Rob. Like most kids that I went to school with, I considered him a friend, though we were never really friendly. There were a bunch of us like that, in every class together since kindergarten, you can't help but think of each other as friends even though you had nothing in common.

17 steps past Bert's house, 15 more steps to the corner, right next to the stop sign. Besides Main street this was the only paved street in town. Three blocks to the right was the school. sometimes I walked this way when I was trying to meet up with my latest crush, but usually I went up the last street closest to my house, entering the school from the back. This street had only been paved in the last year or so. Which was great when it rained because they didn't put in any kind of drainage system and the street turned into a 4 block long swimming hole.

17 steps across school street and I was in a jungle. The home owner on this block grew a variety of great green leafy trees. In the fall they dropped a variety of nuts on your head, small brown acorns, round green walnuts, and some kind of half moon shaped pod that hurt like hell when it hit you on the head. Often on this block you'd be accosted by squirrel who were afraid you were there to steal the great treasure they had found.

At the end of the block was another dirt road. 12 steps across and I was in the heart of the town. This side of the block was the park, to my left, the other side was an row of closely set buildings, a couple with tall fronts left over from almost a century ago. Housing the post office, cafe, grocery store, Joe's Place (a bar), and the one room city hall, this was Main street.

When I was younger, I'd often stop to play at the part before getting the mail, but now I was too old for the rusty swings and the shiny metal slide that burned your skin in the summer sun. 20 steps past the park, 12 more to the corner, 7 to the door.

All post offices everywhere have the same smell. Large or small, they all smell exactly the same way. Everyone I have visited since I left this small town has always reminded me of the one back home, because of the aroma that met me when I entered.

The mail box room was very small. Only about 6 feet wide and 15 feet deep. 150 metal doors were on the right, all exactly the same small square size. Taking the key out of my pocket I open our box. I never really had to check to see if I had the right one, it's location was so firmly branded into my mind it was a habit, like walking or chewing.

Would today bring something from outside our little town? I had a couple of pen pals from church camp last summer. They, like me, were in their own little towns, with their own walks to the post office. All of us, making the walk every day hoping to hear from each other. Would today bring a glimpse from their world into mine?

Or would I have to make the 172 steps home, lonelier than I was before?

Ask Yourself "What Would Jesus Do?" (Unless it's a question of money, then you should fight to keep it)

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Wed, 30 Sep 2009 17:41:00 +0000

I have some conservative friends that will probably never speak to me again after reading this, but that's their choice. This is just my opinion and they don't have to like me for it. I consider myself fairly conservative, leaning toward libertarian, but I am honestly frustrated and disgusted by what many conservatives are doing these days to get their point across. What's worse, many are doing it under than banner of "The Religious Right" (as in "we are Right and you are wrong").

Let me start with one that was just completely ridiculous. I saw this commercial the other night on late-night TV. I haven't seen it since and couldn't find the website, so I'm hoping someone told them how much of an idiot they are and they shut down. The commercial said something like this:

"The liberals are trying to shut down American industry by declaring CO2 a pollutant. If they do, then the world will end because CO2 is actually good for the planet and if we produce more of it it will be good for all of us. Let congressman Joe Blow know that we want our CO2."

Seriously, that's what it said. Now any 4th grade student will tell you that plants use CO2 to produce oxygen, but they will also tell you that too much CO2 isn't a good thing. They will tell you that plants use so little CO2 that if everything that produces CO2 were to suddenly go away (humans, animals, all that stuff) and the plants were left alone with the CO2 that's already in the air, they would never run out. They can also point to a time when there was more CO2 and the world wasn't any better. They teach this stuff in GRADE SCHOOL. (Let's not go to the whole "All teacher's are Liberal Fascists" argument, ok?)

So are we honestly counting on the stupidity of the American people that we are willing to invent an issue that doesn't really exist to try to disable our current government? Or are we honestly too stupid ourselves to know how stupid we are in our attempts to distract our government from real issues?

The one that's driving me and everyone else up the wall is health care reform. No one, except maybe the insurance companies that are doing quite will, will deny that there are problems with our current system. Everyone that's been to the doctor or knows someone who's been to the doctor can tell you about some experience with the system, be it large or small, that is a symptom of it's broken-ness. Can we all agree on that? Yes? Good. No? Then I'm really happy that you don't have any serious health problems, because if you did, then you would know just how broken it is.

Either way, everyone has on opinion in the current debate over health care. There are so many sides to this problem that I don't think it's possible, unless someone devotes themselves to it full time, for anyone to fully understand the current debate in Washington. But the biggest thing that everyone seems to be howling about is the so-called "Public Option".

This, in itself, is a complex issue, but here's how I understand it. Imagine a Wal-Mart. (Let's call it Insurance-Mart.)The products on the shelves of this Insurance-Mart represent all the options you have for buying health insurance. That can there represents MetLife, that box is Blue Cross, etc. If you are buying health insurance you have many bright shiny options to choose from in the Insurance-Mart. Some people don't have to shop at Insurance-Mart because their employer shops there for them, but other people come here when they need to.

Now, when you shop at a real Wal-Mart, next to the name brands you'll see a Wal-mart brand. Like if you are buying spaghetti sauce, you'll see Ragu and Prego and Hunts, but you'll also see Sam's Choice or Member's Mark or something like that.

The public option for health care would be like the "store brand" in our Insurance-Mart. It's cheaper, doesn't taste quite the same, but it's just as good. Some people will choose the store brand because they can't afford the name brand.

Now, it's a lot more complicated than that, but that's a pretty good way of looking at it from a layman's point of view.

Now what people are freaking out about is paying for it. Someone has to produce the store-brand for it to be on the shelf. The people freaking out don't want their hard-earned tax dollars going to help people that don't deserve it. (Let's just forget the reality of tax-payer supported programs like Medicaid and Medicare and how many people on those programs don't deserve it...) And that's a valid point. But what if people DO deserve it? What if someone is really honestly desperately in need or they will die?

(Incidentally, if you want to read the bills, here they are:
senate bill: http://documents.propublica.org/senate-health-care-bill#p=1
house bill: http://documents.propublica.org/house-health-care-bill#p=1
senate finance bill (the one that says how it's all getting paid for):http://www.opencongress.org/baucus_bill_health_care.html)

Some people would say, "So what? Let them die. I'm keeping my money." And the worst part about this is, some of the people who are saying that are saying things like "The Bible doesn't say I have to help people this way" or "God wants me to be rich, you must have done something to deserve to be poor."

And that just makes me want to puke. To these folks, "What Would Jesus Do?" seems to apply to every part of their life except where their money is concerned.

A conversation with them might go some thing like this:

What would Jesus do? Well, let's look at what Jesus DID do. He walked on water, He gave some sermons, He healed the sick and the lame, He died on a cross, He came back to life.... wait.. go back a couple... what was that? He healed the sick and the lame? Yes, he helped people who couldn't help themselves.

You mean the very people that I, I mean, some are saying don't deserve to live because they are poor are the very people that Jesus helped while he was here on Earth?

Yes. Exactly. So why wouldn't you want to do the same?

Well, it's all very well and good if I want to do it on my own, but the government shouldn't force me to do it by taking my money and giving it to others.

Ok, I see that point. (Let's just not discuss how you want the government to force other people to do things, like not get an abortion. But OK.) So, exactly how much of your money do you give out to help these people? Oh, and before you answer, did you ever consider that if you and everyone else who thinks it's a good idea actually DID it, the government wouldn't have to, did you ever think of that?

That's when they usually start calling me a liberal socialist and throw things at me.

If you want to debate health care reform and what is right and what is wrong, fine, but don't hide behind your Bible and say you're entitled to keep your money. As a believer you should believe that it's not your money anyway, everything belongs to God and He loans it to you to do something with it. Don't hide behind James Dobson and pretend you know what you're talking about.

Ok. I'm off on a rant. I'll stop that now.

My original point was, why are some so gung-ho to derail this President and his programs? Is it just because he is a liberal? I don't think so. The Clinton era had much more radical programs and ideas and I didn't see people saying we should shoot him. In fact, many of the things that are coming around now are things that Clinton tried to do when he as in office. (Does anyone remember the flap over Clinton's plan for a single-payer health care system? No, of course not.) There just seems to be something about the individual that is President rather than what he says that seems to get to people.

Now, for the record, let me just say, I'm not too fond of the President's plans - not all of them anyway. But that's not an attack on him as a person or his beliefs, just his policies. Also, there are some things he stands for that I LOATHE. However, I'm not going to go out there and make up lies to try to derail the process. Lies will backfire from both ways. All I or anyone else can do is KNOW what is TRUE and work the system the right way. That's how Abraham Lincoln did it, that's how Truman did it, and that's how we need to do it.

I'm ranting again aren't I? I can't help it. I'll shut up now.

Another Gimp Creation

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Tue, 22 Sep 2009 06:10:00 +0000

Everything is created except the galaxies in the background - that's a photo from NASA. I can't seem to get the cloud cover on the blue planet quite right and the shadow in the lower right corner is a little harsh, but I think it's worth sharing. If you'd like to know how it's done, let me know.

Maybe the healing has begun.

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Tue, 22 Sep 2009 00:56:00 +0000

I've written a lot about my church on this blog, usually shaking my fist at the Heavens and asking "WHY? WHY? WHY?!!!??" The teachers and leadership at this church just seemed so lost and confused that I am honestly surprised that the doors haven't been shut long before now.

But something has started to happen. The last couple of Sundays that I was able to attend (not concurrent due to my disability) the services has come alive in a way that was severely lacking before. It's as if this body has been holding it's breath and has finally allowed itself to breath again.

I can't really define it. Quantitatively and Qualitatively nothing has changed in the music, the message, or anything in the mechanics of the service. There just seems to be a.... passion, a purpose, a... well, a community that didn't exist just a few short weeks ago.

And for that I am very grateful. I will write more as things unfold and I can make sense of what is going on.

When The Fire Fades - The Christian life when you don't "feel it"

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 17:09:00 +0000

It's been a while since I've written on spiritual matters. I just haven't had much to say on the subject lately. I'm going through one of those times where it's just not foremost in my mind.

Is that wrong? To have your spiritual life put on a "back burner" and not be in the fore-front of your heart and mind every second of every day? I'm not talking about being totally turned off or going through the motions. I still go to church, I still pray often, I still read the Bible daily (or to be truthful, I listen to it on my iPod.) Things like that. But it's not like when I first became a Christian, when I had that "fire in the belly" and I wanted every aspect of my life to be all about Christ. Now it's more like smoldering coals and it's a part of the fabric of my life rather than trying to make it the whole thing.

The Bible tells us to "pray without ceasing" and "love the Lord with all your heart, mind, body, and soul" (I'm paraphrasing). Does that mean we devote every moment to spiritual matters? Am I off track by not constantly listening to Christian music or watching the 700 club and replacing all my videos with Gaither Homecoming shows?

Some will tell you that I am, they will tell you if you are not "feeling it" then you are not on the right path. These folks are constantly seeking that "mountaintop" experience. They go to all the conferences and conventions and concerts they can get to. They don't go to movies unless they are made by "Christian" studios, they don't listen to music unless it's played on "Christian" radio.

Others will say the whole purpose of your life as a Christian is to make other Christians. That if you aren't constantly telling people about Christ and "leading them to Christ" and "sharing the Gospel" (and a hundred other ways of saying "share Christ") Then you aren't really a Christian.

Another thing I've heard is that you have to "go to the alter" every once in a while. Like you have to recommit yourself every now and then, like you have to be born again and again and again.

I don't think any of these are on quite the right track. While all of them have a little truth in them, they are all missing the big picture and none of them truly address being in the period of your Spiritual life where it's just kind of "there".

If you are a Christian you might know what I'm talking about. When you first became a Christian you threw away all your "secular" music, only to go out and buy it all over again a year or so later. You avoided any movie that wasn't produced by Billy Graham, only to spend a lot of money at the video store catching up on all the movies your friends were talking about. You disconnected your cable TV so you wouldn't see any "bad" shows, only to hook it back up to catch the re-runs of "Lost" and "The Office". You sold your Playstation a year ago, but you just bought an XBox so you can play Rock Band or Halo. You still like some Christian music, but more often your radio is tuned to the 80s station or the country channel. You will talk about your Christianity but maybe you're embarrassed to talk about your church. You're at that place where some might say you are "compromising" or have become "secularized".

But I don't think that's what it is. Maybe others are drifting away, but that's not what I'm talking about. You haven't chosen to not be a Christian, you're just comfortable in your faith. At least that's where I am. I think this is what the Bible means when it says "in the world not of it". Jesus didn't avoid the sinful people around them, he went to them. He didn't avoid the entertainment of the time, he embraced it. (Oral story telling was the TV of His time.) He stood up to those who were saying "can't do this can't do that, have to do this, have to do that".

I think this is a good place to be. I'm not saying I'm "done" that I've "got this figured out" or anything like that. All I'm saying is that my Spiritual life is not compartmentalized from my "regular" life. I'm at a point where it's all woven together, that there aren't things I have to "turn off" or "turn on" when I am around other Christians or likewise when I'm around non-Christians. It's OK to listen to The Beatles one minute and Keith Green the next. It's OK to watch The Office after getting home from Bible study. That's not compromising, that's living in the world, being able to talk to people without sounding like an idiot, shining the light without blinding people.

So if you are where I am, welcome. But don't get too comfortable, because God has a way of surprising us when we're not expecting it.

I've done my best to help you grow wings, so FLY!

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Fri, 28 Aug 2009 21:35:00 +0000

Almost two weeks ago we moved Miss C to college in Las Cruces. Like most parents in this situation, my emotions are a wreck. I am so very proud of her, but at the same time she's leaving home the first of our brood to do so.

Miss C received a full-ride honors scholarship to NMSU. Her grades were always through the roof and we knew that wherever she applied she would be offered piles of money to attend. But we weren't expecting this. As graduation got closer and closer, the reality of her going AWAY to college got more real.

And now it's reality. She is the first to leave the nest and spread her wings and take off. This is when you really wonder what kind of parent you've been. Have you really prepared your child for this? Is she really ready to do things on her own? Can she handle the pressure of college life? Can she deal with the insanity and craziness of party animals, peer pressure, and co-ed dorms? This is when you really wonder if you've done right by your child.

As we left her at her dorm for the last time, shouting good-byes over my shoulder, I began to feel something I hadn't expected. I can't really describe it, but I was expecting to feel sad. Sad that this beautiful child wouldn't be part of my household except on the holidays. But what I felt was like the absence of sadness, but also a sense of excitement and pride. And a bit of jealousy. Jealous because she gets to live the adventure that for me was more than 20 years ago. I wouldn't want to relive it, but if there were some way I could do it again the FIRST time, like if I had amnesia and forgot doing it once and do it again like that, that's what I'm jealous of.

Thanks to the wonder that is the Internet, I get to talk to her every day, at least for a few minutes. I get to hear about what is going on with her every day. I get to hear about what she's doing, what's going right, what's going wrong, all of it. I am so proud of the way she's dealing with everything. Yes, she's had some rough things already, but she's kept her head up, marched on, and dealt with it. She's made new friends, getting out and about and having a great time.

I wanted to write this post to express my feelings about her going away, but I'm finding I just don't have the words to adequately talk about it. In some ways I am almost emotionless. It's like this is just the natural extension of where her life has been going. It's like I couldn't expect anything less than success from her because she has always excelled. In other ways I am in mourning. The act of moving her to college represents the end, the final act of her childhood. No longer is she dependent on us for food, a bed, any of that. From here on out she is on her own. That makes me a little sad.

College is a great thing, especially a large school with housing for their students. It's like a halfway house between childhood and adulthood. It's a chance to do your own thing, but still have someone there to take care of you. The cafeteria takes care of the food, the dorm takes care of your rent, but other than that you are free, free to come and go as you please. Because of that situation, I am not worried about her daily needs. I'm not worried about her safety and security. I know she knows how to take down someone who is hassling her. So in this sense, maybe it will be more worry-some to me when she graduates college or gets married and enters the real REAL world.

So, Miss C, I guess what I really want to say is I'm proud of you. I did my best to help you grow your wings and it's just amazing to me to see that they are big and strong and you have the ability to not just fly, but to soar. Soar, baby, soar.

Another bad day

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Mon, 24 Aug 2009 20:13:00 +0000

I started to feel it come on last night. It's a feeling that I can't really describe, but the closest I can get is that it's the physical equivalent of a storm front blocking out the sun, it gets dark and cold.

But it's also pain. It's not a sharp pain, but it's not dull either. It's like... shiny. Stinging. All over. It affects my mobility, my vision, my ability to think clearly, to talk clearly.

So I blog. It helps. It's helps me focus, it help distract me from the pain. It helps me vent my anger and frustrations and general not nicety-ness.

Here's a picture of a cow.

I really like my doctor, or I did until the last visit. He seemed really on top of things and then this last time it was like he didn't know what the heck we'd been talking about for the last two years. I wonder if he thinks I'm faking. He seemed really put out when I asked him to fill out the papers for the insurance this time. I don't know it was just really frustrating.

For now we're done with the bouncing around from one specialist to another. Most because we're out of money. None of them really seemed to care. Maybe they all think I'm faking it. I'm sure there are many that do. Maybe it's a big problem in this area and all of them are really leery of helping anyone because they've gotten burned. I don't know. It doesn't matter right now because I don't have health insurance, probably won't be able to get it ever again so it will be a long time before I get to see any more doctors.

Here's a picture of a cantaloupe.

My friend Adam linked something on his Facebook that was really good. It made me realize that maybe I am in mourning. Mourning for the death of the me that was. I think I'm stuck in that place of mourning where I just want to be left alone. The article also talks about being disappointed with the author's church, the one place that should understand mourning and be helping one to move past it. Instead the author found community in another place that helped her through the mourning process in a way that the church should have. I haven't found that yet, I think. I don't like going to church because it just seems so.... shallow. Not that the preacher's not good, not that the music isn't ok, not that the people aren't loving and caring, it's just not... family. It's just not community. I think I need to find that if I am going to get past this.

Here's a picture of a turtle eating a frog:

It's hard being a parent. We're in a place right now, with all our kids, where we are simultaneously dealing with an unemployed adult child, a college freshman, and potty training. All equally trying and stressful. You never stop being a parent. I still talk to my mother (not as much as I should!) about stuff. As I write this I'm chatting with her online about how to deal with something. I hope my kids do the same when they are older.

It seems like we've had so much crap come crashing down around us lately. We're overwhelmed in the parenting department. I know it will all pass , but it's just so much all at once. We're literally crushed by what all we have going on right now - so many unfinished projects that have had to be put on hold to deal with all this. We can barely walk through the house because of everything that's up in the air.

Here's a picture of something to eat, but I don't know what it is:

Ok. I've been rambling off and on for about 4 hours now. Maybe I should take some Tylenol and a nap.

Not a lot to say lately

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Sat, 22 Aug 2009 17:18:00 +0000

I haven't had much to say lately on this blog. Not sure why. There's a lot going on in the world that I could spew forth my opinion on, like health insurance (which I have talked about a lot, but it's a real thorn in my side, always have something to say on that subject), cash for clunkers (ok, what's next? give away money for eating cheese? for buying bread? we need to start producing something with this money), our broken microwave (it's like almost 20 years old, probably too dangerous to have around anyway), daughter going off to college (I will blog about that as soon as I can think about it without bawling my eyes out), and potty training (you'd think by the time I was 40 I'd get the hang of it, but....)

Actually, I've been busy with my latest distraction. My video camera. I've even given it it's own blog, which you can see here. We got this thing a while back and it's been great fun. I've always enjoyed turning home videos into fun movies, but this one is digital and it's given me hours of great distraction.

So, maybe soon I'll have something to say.

You gotta check this out

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 19:26:00 +0000

Check the site to see where these artists were filmed:
http://www.playingforchange.com/episodes/2/Stand_by_Me

Top Five Health Care Reform Lies—and How to Fight Back

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 05:09:00 +0000

Lie #1: President Obama wants to euthanize your grandma!!!

The truth: These accusations—of "death panels" and forced euthanasia—are, of course, flatly untrue. As an article from the Associated Press puts it: "No 'death panel' in health care bill."⁴ What's the real deal? Reform legislation includes a provision, supported by the AARP, to offer senior citizens access to a professional medical counselor who will provide them with information on preparing a living will and other issues facing older Americans.⁵

Lie #2: Democrats are going to outlaw private insurance and force you into a government plan!!!

The truth: With reform, choices will increase, not decrease. Obama's reform plans will create a health insurance exchange, a one-stop shopping marketplace for affordable, high-quality insurance options.⁶ Included in the exchange is the public health insurance option—a nationwide plan with a broad network of providers—that will operate alongside private insurance companies, injecting competition into the market to drive quality up and costs down.⁷

If you're happy with your coverage and doctors, you can keep them.⁸ But the new public plan will expand choices to millions of businesses or individuals who choose to opt into it, including many who simply can't afford health care now.

Lie #3: President Obama wants to implement Soviet-style rationing!!!

The truth: Health care reform will expand access to high-quality health insurance, and give individuals, families, and businesses more choices for coverage. Right now, big corporations decide whether to give you coverage, what doctors you get to see, and whether a particular procedure or medicine is covered—that is rationed care. And a big part of reform is to stop that.

Health care reform will do away with some of the most nefarious aspects of this rationing: discrimination for pre-existing conditions, insurers that cancel coverage when you get sick, gender discrimination, and lifetime and yearly limits on coverage.⁹ And outside of that, as noted above, reform will increase insurance options, not force anyoneinto a rationed situation.

Lie #4: Obama is secretly plotting to cut senior citizens' Medicare benefits!!!

The truth: Health care reform plans will not reduce Medicare benefits.¹⁰ Reform includes savings from Medicare that are unrelated to patient care—in fact, the savings comes from cutting billions of dollars in overpayments to insurance companies and eliminating waste, fraud, and abuse.¹¹

Lie #5: Obama's health care plan will bankrupt America!!!

The truth: We need health care reform now in order to prevent bankruptcy—to control spiraling costs that affect individuals, families, small businesses, and the American economy.

Right now, we spend more than $2 trillion dollars a year on health care.¹² The average family premium is projected to rise to over $22,000 in the next decade¹³—and each year, nearly a million people face bankruptcy because of medical expenses.¹⁴ Reform, with an affordable, high-quality public option that can spur competition, is necessary to bring down skyrocketing costs. Also, President Obama's reform plans would be fully paid for over 10 years and not add a penny to the deficit.¹⁵

We're closer to real health care reform than we've ever been—and the next few weeks will decide whether it happens. We need to make sure the truth about health care reform is spread far and wide to combat right wing lies.

Sources:

1. "More 'Town Halls Gone Wild': Angry Far Right Protesters Disrupt Events With 'Incomprehensible' Yelling," Think Progress, August 4, 2009.
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51733&id=16778-5659380-jErxrex&t=2

2. "Fight the smears," Health Care for America NOW, accessed August 10, 2009.
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51729&id=16778-5659380-jErxrex&t=3

3. "Palin Paints Picture of 'Obama Death Panel' Giving Thumbs Down to Trig," ABC News, August 7, 2009.
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51728&id=16778-5659380-jErxrex&t=4

4. "No 'death panel' in health care bill," The Associated Press, August 10, 2009.
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51747&id=16778-5659380-jErxrex&t=5

5. "Stop Distorting the Truth about End of Life Care," The Huffington Post, July 24, 2009.
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51730&id=16778-5659380-jErxrex&t=6

6. "Reality Check FAQs," WhiteHouse.gov, accessed August 11, 2009.
http://www.whitehouse.gov/realitycheck/faq#i1

7. "Why We Need a Public Health-Care Plan," The Wall Street Journal, June 24, 2009.
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51737&id=16778-5659380-jErxrex&t=7

8. "Obama: 'If You Like Your Doctor, You Can Keep Your Doctor,'" The Wall Street Journal, 15, 2009.
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51736&id=16778-5659380-jErxrex&t=8

9. "Reality Check FAQs," WhiteHouse.gov, accessed August 10, 2009.
http://www.whitehouse.gov/realitycheck/faq#r1

10. "Obama: No reduced Medicare benefits in health care reform," CNN, July 28, 2009.
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51748&id=16778-5659380-jErxrex&t=9

11. "Reality Check FAQs," WhiteHouse.gov, accessed August 10, 2009.
http://www.whitehouse.gov/realitycheck/faq#s1

12. "Reality Check FAQs," WhiteHouse.gov, accessed August 10, 2009.
http://www.whitehouse.gov/realitycheck/faq#c1

13. "Premiums Run Amok," Center for American Progress, July 24, 2009.
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51667&id=16778-5659380-jErxrex&t=10

14. "Medical bills prompt more than 60 percent of U.S. bankruptcies," CNN, June 5, 2009.
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51735&id=16778-5659380-jErxrex&t=11

15. "Reality Check FAQs," WhiteHouse.gov, accessed August 10, 2009.
http://www.whitehouse.gov/realitycheck/faq#c1

Sources for the Five Lies:

#1: "A euthanasia mandate," The Washington Times, July 29, 2009.
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51732&id=16778-5659380-jErxrex&t=12

#2: "It's Not An Option," Investor's Business Daily, July 15, 2009.
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51743&id=16778-5659380-jErxrex&t=13

#3: "Rationing Health Care," The Washington Times, April 21, 2009.
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51742&id=16778-5659380-jErxrex&t=14

#4: "60 Plus Ad Is Chock Full Of Misinformation," Media Matters for America, August 8, 2009.
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51734&id=16778-5659380-jErxrex&t=15

#5: "Obama's 'Public' Health Plan Will Bankrupt the Nation," The National Review, May 13, 2009.
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51744&id=16778-5659380-jErxrex&t=16

I Wish I Could Unread It.

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Sat, 08 Aug 2009 02:50:00 +0000

Did you ever read a book that was such a huge disappointment that you wish you could unread it and erase it from your memory? Go back to before you read it and never pick the stupid thing up? I'm not talking about a bad book, I'm talking about a REALLY bad book. One that is so bad that even years later you're like "ARRGH!! Why why why did I read that stupid piece of you-know-what?"

My wife and I were going through a bunch of old books the other day, when my nemesis showed that it was still somewhere in my house, waiting, lurking. That book is "Mostly Harmless".

The author, Douglas Adams, may he rest in peace, made his fortune from his tale "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy". Written as a radio program originally broadcast on British radio, it was later turned into a book, another book, a third book, a BBC TV series, a fourth book, a fifth book, and, recently, a movie.

The one that bugs me is the last one - the fifth book in the trilogy. (Fans of the series will understand.) I sincerely believe that Mr. Adams never intended to write 5 books, I don't think he meant to write 4. The first three are pretty good on their own. The 4th one is OK. But I think the cult status of the books and the money led (or forced) the author to take on another sequel.

But he shouldn't have. It's obvious from the writing that he really didn't want to write it. I don't know if it was the money, if he was under contract to some publisher, or if it was just the big whiney cry-baby fans who were insisting on another book. (In spite of the fact that Mr. Adams was working on other books that were very good and just as much fun to read.)

Spoiler alert. The book wanders around aimlessly for way too many pages. Mr. Adams does try to recapture some of the humor that was the magic of the first few books, but it's obvious that he's trying too hard to do something that he just doesn't want to do. After several long hours of reading about the beloved characters doing practically nothing, they all get killed at the end.

I think the author did that so he wouldn't have to write any more sequels. The story had run it's course long before he got to the fifth book and he just wanted to move on and do other things. He wanted to silence the obsessive rabid fans who were asking him over and over and over again "when are you writing another Hitchhiker's book? when are you writing another Hitchhiker's book? when are you writing another Hitchhiker's book?"

It's not the author's intent that I have problems with. I am a big fan of the series. I've read the first 4 books many times, and will probably read them again, more than once. The issue I have is that the book is honestly a big heaping, steaming, pile of crap. I don't care what the publisher promised him, I don't care what he promised the publisher, neither the author nor the publisher should have let this book go to print. I don't care how whiney and cry-baby the fans were, they should have just let the series stand where it was and not waste anyone's time with this load of tripe.

If I could go back in time and unread the book, I would. Worse, I spent money on a first edition hard cover copy, like $25 if I remember correctly. (I'd burn it if I hadn't.) Yes, it really is that bad.

What book would you unread?

My Life is a John Hughes Movie

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Thu, 06 Aug 2009 23:33:00 +0000

In honor of my favorite movie writer/director's passing today, I present this repost of previous entry. Rest in peace, John. Sincerely yours, The Breakfast Club.
________________________________________

Growing up as a child of the '80's

I was born in the late '60's. My grade school years were the '70's, but I define my "growing up" years as the '80's. In the '80's I had my first girlfriend, found out Darth Vader was Luke's father, learned to drive, discovered that I had a favorite music, had my first job, got my first car, had a crush on Molly Ringwald, saw Haley's Comet (sort of), bleached a streak in my hair, watched the space shuttle explode during science class, received the right to vote, registered for Selective Service, bought really stupid looking clothes, went to college, learned to "twist and shout" with Ferris Beuller, met my wife, got married, had my first child.

My generation is kind of the "undefined" generation. We're too young to be Baby Boomers and too old to be Generation X. We started the whole piercing thing, but only our ears (guys usually just one - left meant you were cool right meant you were "gay", girls had multiple piercings, but still just the ears.) We had our own music and started the "alternative" genre (usually defined as something totally bizzare that would have remained unknown if they didn't have a video on MTV.)

With the advent of cable, we were the first generation to be "media connected". While our parents had TV and radio, their main connection to the world was through the local stations. With cable we had access to movies, music, and who knows what else. Fashion trends and fads that used to take weeks and months to filter across the country were now piped into our living rooms. The influence of media allowed trends and tastes to change very rapidly, often resulting in weird and wild combinations that we still can't explain.

Movies and TV shows defined the life of the '80's teenager as metropolitan. Big city, big school, big parties. Growing up in a small town, the fashions and trends
were really out of place, but we didn't care, it was cool. We saw "The Breakfast Club" and "Pretty in Pink" and dressed and talked like they did anyway. We longed to go to the mall because that was the cool place to hang out.

But small town life was different than what we saw in the John Hughes movies. We wanted to "party like it's 1999", but we were poor, isolated, and would get caught because everybody knew who we were. So we settled for our small town parties.

There is much about my "wonder years" that is unpleasant, but for the most part I have fond memories of my school, my friends, my life. I could spend pages and pages describing small town life, and probably will over the life of this blog, but I will spare you the romanticization in this posting. Being 40, I'm sure there is much that I am not remembering correctly and even more that I have assigned more significance to than it actually deserves. That being said, it's probably a good thing I remember things the way I do, dwelling on the bad would just be depressing.

I'm not sure how to wrap this up. While there is much more to my life, my experiences have made me who I am and the '80's are 25% of my life. I thank you for allowing me this road trip into nostalgia.

This explains everything

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Thu, 06 Aug 2009 20:42:00 +0000

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Why Won't God Heal Amputees?

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Thu, 06 Aug 2009 17:14:00 +0000

I came across that question disguised as a YouTube video called "World's Biggest Illusion" or something like that. It presented itself as one of those optical illusions, but instead was a 10 minute rant. I won't share it with you because it's basically just a series of random pictures of poorly drawn illusions with a guy talking over it the whole time.

At first the question bugged me a bit because it's one of those that really doesn't have an answer. Then I realized that was my issue with it: it really doesn't have an answer. So many anti-Christian/anti-religion/Anti-God "proofs" out there are nothing more than these smoke-and-mirror questions that are designed to "stump" the faithful. Other examples are: "Can God make a rock He can't move?", "If God is good, why does evil exist?", "Can Hitler be in Heaven?" and on and on and on. This was just another in that category.

People who cite these questions as "proof" that God is a fantasy remind me of a bit from one of my favorite books, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. In the universe the author created there exists a little fish that lives in your ear, called the Babel Fish. The fish allows the host to understand any language anywhere. Here's what the book has to say:

The Babel fish is small, yellow, leech-like, and probably the oddest thing in the Universe. It feeds on brainwave energy received not from its own carrier but from those around it. It absorbs all unconscious mental frequencies from this brainwave energy to nourish itself with. It then excretes into the mind of its carrier a telepathic matrix formed by combining the conscious thought frequencies with nerve signals picked up from the speech centers of the brain which has supplied them. The practical upshot of all this is that if you stick a Babel fish in your ear you can instantly understand anything said to you in any form of language. The speech patterns you actually hear decode the brainwave matrix which has been fed into your mind by your Babel fish.

Now it is such a bizarrely improbable coincidence that anything so mind-bogglingly useful could have evolved purely by chance that some thinkers have chosen to see it as a final and clinching proof of the NON-existence of God.

The argument goes like this:

`I refuse to prove that I exist,' says God, `for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing.'

`But,' says Man, `The Babel fish is a dead giveaway, isn't it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don't. QED.'

`Oh dear,' says God, `I hadn't thought of that,' and promptly disappears in a puff of logic.

`Oh, that was easy,' says Man, and for an encore goes on to prove that black is white and gets himself killed on the next zebra crossing.

Most leading theologians claim that this argument is a load of dingo's kidneys, but that didn't stop Oolon Colluphid making a small fortune when he used it as the central theme of his best-selling book, "Well, That about Wraps It Up for God."

Meanwhile, the poor Babel fish, by effectively removing all barriers to communication between different races and cultures, has caused more and bloodier wars than anything else in the history of creation. - Douglas Adams, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, page 42. (Seriously, page 42!)

Those who like to argue for the non-existence of God are like that. Even when faced with something they can't deny is unexplainable, they flip it around to prove their point. If God were to open up the sky and stare them in the face, they would claim they were hypnotized, drugged, hallucinating, that Steven Spielberg was making a movie - anything to deny what is staring them in the face.

Now, I'm not saying that the faithful are right and they are wrong. (I believe that, but that's not the point of this blog post.) My point is, if you are going to make an argument, make a real one. Don't base your debate on smoke-and-mirrors. Yes, these questions will stump an inexperienced debater, I've seen them used to stump even so-called experts. And, I've seen them used on both sides.

Let's get past these childish tactics and discuss things on a real level. Let's admit there are things we don't know, that there are things we CAN'T know. Let's acknowledge that there comes a point that you have to take a leap of faith and not everything can (nor should) be proven. Let's stop pretending that we know everything and really, honestly, talk. That goes for one side as well as the other.

OK?

Let's go.

A Bit Of Fiction - from a dream I had.

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Sun, 02 Aug 2009 19:21:00 +0000

The limousine pulled up in front of the huge house, next to several others that were already there unloading their passengers and their luggage. She didn't understand why there were so many - why couldn't some of us have shared? she thought.

Karen didn't know why she accepted the invitation to come. She hadn't seen her host since high school, and that was more than 20 years. Oh, they had reconnected over the Internet, but that's not the same as being "real" friends, is it? But something about his invitation seemed hard to avoid. There was a deep sadness and loneliness that just seemed to ooze out of the envelope when she opened it. Her heart broke when she read the hand-written letter inside. She had to come.

Apparently, so did many people. The house was large, but not a mansion by any means, and the flood of people in the entry way made it seem tiny. Karen recognized a couple of faces as relatives of her host, a few others may have been fellow classmates that she had long since forgotten, but the stream of bodies into the house made it impossible to talk.

As they entered the house, the crowd broke up. Servants provided refreshment in the dining area and there was ample seating in the living room. As the crowd settled , their host finally appeared. The upstairs had a loft that looked down upon the living room, and he stood by the railing looking down upon his guests. As Karen made eye contact with him, she again felt the sadness in him that drew her here.

As everyone noticed his presence, the small talk quieted, as if expecting him to make a speech. Maybe it wasn't his intention to do so, but now he was obligated.

"Thank you. For coming." he started. "Please, make yourselves at home. The caterers will take care of anything you need. The bathrooms are all over the place. I think there's 15 of them, but I've never counted."

A chuckle rippled through the crowd. He seemed to relax a little.

"For those of you who are guests of my guests, my name is Alex. Yes, you've probably seen me on TV or on a magazine or something like that. My reasoning for inviting you here will become clear in the next few days. In the mean time, relax, make yourselves at home. The TV room is in the back, the video games work for anyone who's bored. The theater is open too, feel free to use the pay-per-view."

Karen looked around at her fellow guests. With a few exceptions, almost everyone was around her age. No one seemed too anxious to try out his expensive toys.

"I'm afraid the sleeping accommodations are limited. I never bothered to furnish most of the bedrooms. For those of you that wish, you are free to call a cab and get a hotel room, but you are free to use any areas of the house you wish. I have acquired what I hope is enough pillows, blankets, and inflatable mattresses to go around. Make yourselves comfortable. I'll talk to you soon."

With that, he walked away from the railing and disappeared into the back of the house. Chatter resumed all around Karen as the guests spread out. Many of them toward the food, others to the ends of the house.

Karen took her luggage and found a room that someone had tacked a handwritten sign to the door stating "Ladies Dressing Room". Across the hall they had designated the "Men's Dressing room". Inside there was no furniture, but many people were storing their belongings, claiming space in the corners and along the walls. She claimed her own space, changing from her traveling clothes into something more presentable, and rejoined the crowd.

Afternoon passed into evening, then the house came ablaze in decorator lighting as darkness fell. The crowd drifted into groups, then smaller groups as conversation passed from small talk to deeper matters. Karen found the classmates she had seen when she entered and they passed the time reliving high school.

As night began to drift toward morning, many people found they were comfortable right where they were and fell asleep on the chairs, the sofas, and the thick carpeting. Some took advantage of the showers, as did Karen. She realized, to her embarrassment, that she had forgotten clean clothes from her luggage.

As she peeked her head out of the bathroom, the house was silent. It seemed she might be the last one awake. Wrapped in a large heavy towel, she tip-toed out into the hallway, passing stealthily past several rooms full of people. As she turned the corner to reach the dressing room where her luggage was, she ran into Alex.

Literally. The collision was sudden and violent.....

_________________

The dream is starting to fade, maybe if I think on it a bit I can remember some more....

Seriously? I mean, Seriously?

noreply@blogger.com (A) — Sun, 02 Aug 2009 04:13:00 +0000

The NRA just assumes they have enough power to intimidate senators not to vote for a supreme court nominee? Seriously?

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/32251444/ns/politics-capitol_hill/

At what point did any lobby group come to have such a high opinion of itself? The fact that they have that opinion shows there has to be some truth behind it.

Seriously.

Time to shoot all lobbyists on sight and get the government to listen to the people again.