The Deranged Housewife

How thyroid disorders can affect postpartum health and the breastfeeding relationship

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 14:35:00 +0000

When you have a baby, you're tired. Your hormones are out of whack, your periods are wonky, you might feel like crap and your hair falls out. Is it from "just being a tired mom" (said by your OB rather condescendingly) or is it because of something else?

When I was three or four months postpartum, I noticed weird stuff going on in my neck. As a side sleeper, I could no longer sleep that way without discomfort and even some pain. It was mildly uncomfortable to swallow, even though it wasn't the same as a typical sore throat pain. My neck swelled up and I thought I had some kind of virus, so I went to the doctor.

The physician's assistant thought maybe I had mono, so she ordered a blood test. It came back negative, but in the meantime she put me on antibiotics. After I took one pill, I thought, Wait a minute, mono is a virus, not bacterial. What the heck am I taking these for? I threw them out.

Another thing she told me: Stop breastfeeding for a while in case your baby gets what you have.

No way was I doing that. I knew my baby would be protected because I was nursing exclusively, and who's to say he wouldn't get it anyway?

I went at least another year before finding out why I felt half-dead most of the time, and probably another year on top of that before starting medication. I couldn't help but wonder, how many other "tired moms" go that long and then some with doctors throwing antidepressants at them, and everyone else patronizingly telling them, "Oh, you're just tired! Get more rest!"

In retrospect, I know now that I had postpartum thyroiditis, where the thyroid gland is affected by a surge of hormones and gets inflamed. In some cases it can last weeks or even months, and then go back to normal. In others, it makes you hypothyroid, and is under the umbrella of autoimmune thyroid disorders, or Hashimoto's disease.

Thyroid disorders can also make you feel depressed, on top of what you might already be feeling as a new mom who is struggling to adjust to changes or new additions in the family. In addition, another possibly huge impact on the new mother is how it can interfere with the breastfeeding relationship. I am bolding this simply because I feel that perhaps this is one component to lower breastfeeding rates, and perhaps the root of some women's difficulties with breastfeeding, that has perhaps been overlooked.

One of the signs is decreased milk volume in breastfeeding women. Considering how prevalent thyroid disorders are, it almost makes you wonder if this is one of the causes behind why some women are unsuccessful at breastfeeding and never really know why. And, according to the La Leche League, little if any research has been done on it - not only do many doctors not have a sound understanding of the mechanics of breast milk production, supply and demand, but seemingly few of those doctors truly understand thyroid disorders, either, sadly. This unknown factor in a mom's health could mean the difference between treating her condition properly or going years without knowing the true underlying cause of why she "couldn't nurse" her babies.

I posed this question of many thyroid patients recently and came up with interesting responses: I asked them if they ever had trouble breastfeeding, and if so, did they find out why? Some never had problems, others were, at one time, able to nurse very well and then suddenly production declined as they had more children. I noticed this myself: with my first, I could pump like crazy, but almost nothing with my second or third children. One said she was successfully able to nurse twins and then, in a later child, had supply issues. And some women said they tried everything - and nothing worked.

Breastmilk production is stimulated by prolactin, which is produced in the pituitary gland. Not coincidentally, the pituitary gland is also responsible for producing TSH, or thyroid stimulating hormone.

In reality, "any woman who has been pregnant can have postpartum thyroiditis," according to thyroid advocate Mary Shomon's website. There is the chance that the thyroid will return to normal in some women, but in others it can lead to a more persistent form of thyroid disorder, whether Hashimoto's or eventually full-blown hypothyroidism.

More reading:
Hashimoto's and Postpartum Thyroiditis
Thyroid problems after pregnancy: A look at postpartum thyroiditis
The impact of thyroid dysfunction on lactation - La Leche League

Stupid crap my doctor says

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 13:28:00 +0000

I've said before that when it comes to getting my thyroid problems sorted out, my doctor's not too bad. He was totally open to me going to Armour Thyroid, hasn't said anything really objectionable and doesn't treat me like I'm crazy, which is a plus. Apparently, I'm really lucky in that department, though, because some people have an insanely hard time connecting with a doctor who knows what the hell they're doing.

"What the heck does the
thyroid gland do? Most physicians
will tell you 'it controls metabolism,'
which is what we all learned in
medical school. That statement is
basically the same as saying, 'It's
really complicated and I don't
understand it.'" - Dr. Rob Lamberts

A friend of mine is 43 and exhibits a ton of symptoms: facial swelling, celiac disease, tiredness and a bunch of other stuff. I told him to switch doctors, and he said he already had - five times. His regular physician told him, "Well, you're getting old...."

When I first went to my OB for bloodwork, I knew something was wrong but wasn't sure what. After my results came back, he simply stated, "Your antibodies are elevated." When I asked him what that meant, he said, "It just means you'll eventually have to go on medication." Thanks for elaborating!

I've mentioned several times in past posts how a friend was told to "fake it" by her doctor when she was concerned about low sex drive and her thyroid function. He also told her to stop drinking pop (even though she doesn't) and to 'get off the couch.' Why, I'd love to, if only I wasn't so tired all I wanted to do was sleep. All. day. long.

I once got into a rather heated Facebook debate with a nurse practitioner who, along with her physician husband, thinks many of the people in her practice use it as an excuse. She went on about the TSH, and eventually changed her tune and shut up when I told her you can have high antibodies, hypo symptoms and a totally normal TSH, all at the same time.

I asked others and they told me this:

Amber: "The old "eat less, move more" mantra. I've eaten 900-1200 calories a day and exercised for 10-12 hours a week for months on end, and have still, little by little, kept gaining weight."

Beth: "That none of my symptoms...PMS, depression, weight gain, insomnia, anxiety - were thyroid-related. This was the same guy who said that a TSH of 9 was within normal limits and that Armour is unreliable."

LynnSue: "'You have Hashimoto's, but we don't keep track of your antibodies because it doesn't really mean anything and there is nothing we can do about it.' I was told this by SEVERAL doctors, most of them endocrinologists....My highly esteemed endocrinologist told me that my slow, steady weight gain was "middle age" (I'm 51) and that many of her female patients have chosen to get liposuction. 'I'm telling you that off the record,' she said. She never, ever tested by B-12 in the 15 years I was with her, even though Hashi's patients are often deficient in it. When I got it tested on my own (through my GP) and showed her the deficient results, she said, 'Well, I guess that one slipped under the radar.'"

Jessica: "I had the opposite of LynnSue. 'You have crazy high antibodies and 'normal' numbers otherwise. Go see a rheumatologist. I can't help you.'"

Rebecca: "'What you had before your thyroid was removed was Grave's Disease, but now it's called Hoshimoto's.' Seriously! 'All your levels are checking out fine so its not anything to do with your endocrine system. It's something else and nothing I can help you with further."

(Note: I've heard some people speculate that endocrinologists no longer know how to deal with thyroid problems because they're all seeing diabetes cases - which is a complication from hypothyroidism, by the way....)

Lisa: "'Eat 500 calories a day and try to work out more.' Keep in mind I was already lifting weights five times a week and going bald....Two of the four morons told me to eat 500 calories. I also was an anorexic/bulimic for years who recovered with Atkins. The others just thought I was tired from being a mom. Grrr..."

Terah: "'You have Hashimoto's, your TSH is below 2. Let's wait and see what happens.'" (And in the meantime, it's totally okay for you to feel like crap... we'll just wait for you to continue to fall apart, 'k?)

Michele: "'Thyroid problem? What thyroid problem? Your TSH is fine.'"

Kira: "'Here...take this Prozac..it will raise your serotonin and make you feel way better...it's not your thyroid.' Four days later, had a grand mal seizure and lost my four front teeth and developed a systemic blood poisoning from the infection that set in...Yeah, thanks, doc."

Pamela: "I was also told that my complete and total exhaustion, muscle pain, ataxia and weight gain was because I was a mom with a four-month-old...(ring a bell?) By the time my doc agreed to test me, my T3 and T4 levels were ZERO. He said he'd never seen numbers that low. This was 17 years ago. It's been a long, wild ride since then."

Lorrie: "I suffered 'tonsilitus' every year of my life until I finally found a doctor who knew the minute he saw me that I had Graves Disease (at age 43)... Then there was the cardiologist my doctor sent me to for a stress test... without even looking at my folder announced the reason I was sent to see her was because I was 'lazy.' (after two surgeries and gaining 60 pounds)

Suzie: "Me: 'Could your numbers be normal, but you still have symptoms?' Endo: 'No, that's impossible!' followed by a condescending head shake....'It's functional. Here is 7 mgs of Xanax. Also, here is Abilify, Zoloft, Paxil, Lexapro, Risperdal, Ambien, Adderall, Ritalin, etc. and an application for SSI!"

Nadia: "'People's bodies change a lot as they get older; it's normal that you're putting on weight and feeling tired - just eat less and exercise more!' At the time, I was 23, eating vegetarian and mostly raw food, working as a waitress and going to the gym 2-3 times a week!"

Yvonne: "'Your symptoms have nothing to do with you being hypothyroid; I want you to see a psychiatrist,' who consequently diagnosed me with somatization disorder (all in my head syndrome). My GP ate his words last month when he said, 'Your remarkable improvement on NDT can no longer be ignored.'" (emphasis mine)

Terah: "My first endo said, 'So you have a few symptoms. You don't need medicine for something that is going to slowly kill off your thyroid anyway.' (Hashi's) Then she went on to say since I was getting older that there was no need to have sex so the lack of sex drive was a benefit. I could not have made that one up!"

Dear Lordy be. I'm not even sure what to say about that one.

If this is your doctor's approach to treating your symptoms, run, run, far away!

More reading:
Why an endocrinologist or thyroidologist should probably not be your thyroid doctor
The many myths of hypothyroidism - Dr. Kenneth Blanchard
What's wrong with these doctors?

I'm on thyroid meds, but why aren't they working?

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 15:43:00 +0000

Without my Synthroid and six cups
of Starbucks, I'm worthless in the
mornings! Just ignore that eye twitch.
Photo credit: freeretroclipart.com

This is one question I've asked myself sometimes in the last eight months since I've been taking meds. At first, when they worked, it was like the crack high I've never experienced. I had enough energy to do ski hills, three times, hiking for hours all over the place. My poor family would be dragged along in my pursuits to do things bigger! better! faster! and as I sat, fidgety and tapping my foot, I would stand up and say, "I have to go run on the treadmill!" Where the heck did that come from?! My husband would look at me like, "Who abducted my wife and replaced her with you?"

I asked a fellow bus stop mom and Synthroid user if she felt good. She said she was tired all the time, among other things, and was surprised when I told her those were all symptoms of hypothyroidism. I'm not even sure she knew what many of the symptoms even were, so I wondered, how does she know if her meds are even working or not? She went on to tell me that she's been on the same dosage since her first child was born, like 11 years ago.

I wasn't going to give her medical advice, but it almost sounded like she needed a dosage adjustment to me. Eleven years is a long time to be on the same dose, especially if you've had a baby and are still having symptoms. Every month I get mine filled, a nice warning label appears on the bottle: "This medicine may need adjustment if you are pregnant." If you've had a baby, that can definitely throw things off.

Menopause can also mess things up, as many women blame it for symptoms like depression, low sex drive and fatigue - when, in fact, their thyroid function is low. This can explain why some women still exhibit symptoms even while on hormone replacement therapy.

It's also important to remember that even though your TSH might be "within normal limits," it might be high for you. You are not the same person as someone else, and lowering it even a few points could make a world of difference. Some references say especially women should have "at least a TSH" done every year once they reach 35, but in my opinion I'd want more than just that: because the damage could already be occurring. If you have Hashimoto's like I do, you may benefit from treatment before your TSH even shows a real problem.

Some other things that come to mind that are possibly worth looking into if your meds aren't working:

• You haven't been on them long enough. For me, when they were really working, it worked well. But honestly, I sometimes wonder if I didn't give it enough time to really do its thing. On one hand, it's been eight months, but on the other, it sometimes takes quite a while before finding the right dose that works for you. I can't say I feel bad all the time, and can't honestly expect to feel perfect every single day. One thing I remember reading in Dr. Mark Starr's book - for some people, it can take awhile for everything to "unclog" once they start on meds. I think it's very easy to give up too easily because it is often a pain in the ass to reach that perfect point, and when you're as motivated as a snail to begin with, it's bad enough as is it.

• You're on generic instead of name brand. For some people, there is a difference, despite what your doctor thinks. Your thyroid is like a computer: if you're running software for a PC but you have a Mac, it ain't gonna work very well, or for too long. It might be okay for a little while, and then suddenly things start to go haywire. But, it's different for everyone.

• If you're on Armour, know that the product was reformulated several years ago. Because they changed the type of fillers they use to bind the pill, some people cannot digest it and break it down to effectively use the medication. Some people have tried it sublingually, some break it in half, some crush it - it might take some tinkering if you suspect this problem, so don't give up. Some people also split their pills in half and take several doses throughout the day with great success.

• You aren't taking it correctly. This one seems like a no-brainer, but maybe not for everyone. Although some people report no problems, most medical literature and pharmaceutical inserts will tell you to avoid eating for an hour after taking your pill. Certain products, like anything containing calcium, should not be taken for up to four hours after taking it. Some people, including myself, take it in the early morning hours (since we're already awake to go pee or tuck a kid back into bed). You should also avoid anything containing estrogen or iron when you take your thyroid medicine for maximum absorption.

• You're on the same dose for too long. I've noticed that if I needed a raise in dose, it was going to happen within about 2-3 weeks after the initial dosage. On a couple occasions if I waited too long to raise, it was like I experienced all the old symptoms and then some, like I was crashing big-time.

• Janie Alexander at the Stop the Thyroid Madness website says patients are often afraid to raise their dose - and I can understand why, to some extent. Splitting a pill in half might not hurt just to try it - but don't do too much. I'm not giving medical advise, but I've often doubled my dose with good results, depending on the dose I started with (for instance, I'd rather double a 30 mg dose than a 60 mg one!). It's important to increase gradually and not by too much, like when I wanted to go from 60 to 75 mg of Armour and thought I was going to die. I guess I know now where my personal threshold is...

• To complicate things even more, Janie suggests that even though you are experiencing hyper- symptoms, it could be more from things like adrenal fatigue. Cutting and pasting because it just makes much more sense when she says it:

"Yes, a doctor can guide you to go too high with desiccated thyroid and you’ll have hyper symptoms. You would then want to decrease your amount. But even more common is having hyper-like symptoms (anxiety, shakiness, fast heart rate, etc), especially on doses lower than 3 grains, because of underlying low-functioning adrenals (i.e. not enough cortisol), or even a low Ferritin or iron—-each and/or both of which can be quite common in hypothyroid patients. So it can be wise to get both your iron and cortisol levels checked."

And if that wasn't complicated enough, some don't even believe that adrenal fatigue is even possible. One doctor poo-poohs it and says that accepting a diagnosis from an unqualified practitioner can make you sicker - while the "real diagnosis" of depression and fibromyalgia - go untreated. (By the way, depression is a common symptom of hypothyroidism, and many believe there is a connection between fibromyalgia and low thyroid function. Just thought I'd throw that in.)

• You would do better on Armour Thyroid. If T4 only meds don't work for you anymore, perhaps you need to switch to something else and see how it works.

More reading:
Mistakes patients (and their doctors) make - Stop the Thyroid Madness
Adrenal fatigue/exhaustion

You've lost that lovin' feeling

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 15:14:00 +0000

If you've ever opened a spam email, seen an infomercial or traveled down the vitamin aisle at the pharmacy, you have probably seen the (often ridiculous) products marketed to men to the improve their sex drive. The commercials for Levitra and similar products are vomit-inducing for sure, and kind of make me laugh - what about all those women with low sex drive? Who are these women that men are trying to please by rushing out to order libido enhancers?

The claims they make are laughable - and I can't believe reputable pharmacies are actually selling this crap. But what I want to know is, where are the female enhancement pills? Why does no one seem to care about that?

According to one 2008 study, upwards of 40 percent of women report having a low sex drive. While the Levitra ads are geared towards people reaching retirement age, studies indicate young women have this problem, too. Many think that use of antidepressants and birth control can be to blame - Paxil, for one, is a known killer of the sex drive. Apparently, many of the women in the study also reported being depressed - and noticed a further decrease in libido when using antidepressants.

Guess what? Depression and low sex drive can also be signs of a thyroid disorder! Of course, the article doesn't mention the word "thyroid" as a cause anywhere. Many popular medical sites often do not include low sex drive as a symptom; in fact, one site suggested it was only a problem in men.

Women are often embarrassed to talk about sexual problems with their doctors, and many times it's blamed on lifestyle: busy, working full time, raising children, "you're tired!" Nah, I don't think so. While it can certainly contribute to that, it often doesn't get to the root of the problem. And if your care provider doesn't know it's a symptom, they're more likely to brush you off.

Awhile back I blogged about a friend who's doctor insisted she "stop drinking too much soda pop" in response to her noticeable weight gain, even though she doesn't drink pop, she said. As far as her excruciatingly low sex drive, her doctor's advice was to "fake it." How horrifying.

So, we market millions of dollars worth of junk medicine to men in an attempt to restore their "function," but women get relegated to the back burner - perhaps even ignored and brushed off - when it comes to their sexual problems. 'Just blame it on kids!'

Ladies, just another reason to get your thyroid tested. And men, skip the worthless enhancement pills and get yours checked, too!

More reading:
Low Sex Drive and Thyroid Disease
Sex Drive 101 for Thyroid Patients
Low sex drive in women

Synthroid vs. Armour: Squashing the competition

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 14:36:00 +0000

When it comes to treating thyroid problems, your physician will probably prescribe one drug: synthetic thyroid hormone, either Synthroid or a generic equivalent. Generic levothyroxine is one of the most popularly prescribed drugs in the United States. And in 2010, profits of Synthroid rose over 18 percent and made Abbott Pharmaceuticals $123 million dollars richer.

There are alternatives to Synthroid, but you'd never know it based on some of the information from doctors and major thyroid advocacy websites. In some of the research I've done on thyroid treatment natural desiccated thyroid (NDT) isn't even mentioned at all.

Many doctors tell their patients it's "outdated," old-fashioned or "isn't even on the market anymore," and some outright refuse to prescribe it for their patients. Some patients give it a bad rap because it caused problems for them, when really it's probably the prescribing physician who is not dosing them properly. Basically, many thyroid groups and physicians are detracting patients from using NDT and funneling them towards Synthroid - perhaps because of financial incentives, pervasive myths and incorrect information about the product.

One theory is because desiccated thyroid comes from an animal source, it cannot be patented. While cost can vary, Armour Thyroid is roughly half the cost I used to pay for Synthroid, and Armour has both T3 and T4 in it - whereas synthetic is T4 only. (Each hormone level is essential in the thyroid's production, basically, to give your body energy, but the mainstay of thyroid treatment these days only includes one hormone rather than a little of each.)

There are synthetic T3 meds like Cytomel, but guess what that means: you have to have two prescriptions filled, instead of just one with natural desiccated thyroid. More prescriptions to fill means you spend more money. Name-brand Cytomel runs around $40 per 30-day prescription on drugstore.com, and generic is about $30 for a 30-day supply. Add that to a month's worth of Synthroid and two prescription T3-T4 meds will cost around $70 a month versus $14.99 for Armour (depending on the dose, of course).

Before the advent of blood tests that were supposed to be the magic answer to every problem, doctors paid more attention to symptoms. Before synthetic versions were introduced to the market, thyroid patients were treated with natural desiccated thyroid and many did very well. Some adjustments were accounted for, because every patient was different. Many criticize it as being "unregulated," although I'm sure science has improved since then, but natural thyroid is a prescription medication and therefore has to go through the same regulatory process as any other drug.

While some people do wonderfully on Synthroid, not all do - even though many medical professionals tell them it's their only option. Not only that, but many people believe - and know to be true, based on personal experience - that there is wide variation in effectiveness between brands of synthetic hormone, as well as between name-brand and generic. As a pharmacy technician, the pharmacist told me this when filling prescriptions for patients, and I still hear these same stories from thyroid patients all over the web. When I got my prescription filled for the first time, the pharmacist herself reiterated the same thing: that many (many!) patients believe name-brand to be superior, and it's not just psychological as some would have us to believe.

Not long ago generic levothyroxine came under fire because its strength was not as potent as it should be. The medication was recalled and brought to light problems people were having with a return to symptoms while being medicated. As far as synthetic versus name-brand, I've heard that the FDA considers the potency of synthetic hormones to be between "90 to 110 percent," which can mean a huge difference for some people. But, because it's sanctioned by the FDA and considered "true," drugs like Armor are considered poorly regulated and should be avoided. Gee, I wonder why they'd say that? It seems that the synthetic hormone drugs have the same problems that doctors are criticizing Armour for.

Some websites wage an all-out attack on natural desiccated thyroid and label it "do not use" because it's

not adequately guaranteed to provide appropriate blood levels of thyroid hormone and reliable alternatives are available.

Seriously? Tell that to all the patients who are doing well on natural thyroid medications! Curiously, the same website - "Worst Pills, Best Pills" - mentions a lawsuit brought to the manufacturers of Synthroid because they suppressed information that supposedly proved they were wrongly influencing patients to believe their medication was superior to generics, even though "scientific" evidence had shown it was the same. While many people complain of a return to symptoms if their medication was switched, medical professionals often pass this off as "psychological." (So that irregular bleeding that my neighbor complained of when her insurance company switched her meds without asking was all in her mind, right?)

The site goes on to say that it should not be taken except by those who have found successful results from it "for years" - meaning, they want a whole new generation of thyroid sufferers to be dependent on crappy, subpar medication and not realize that many of their symptoms still prevail and are not normal. Perhaps the most frustrating problem is the medical community's tendency to "fix it and forget it" when it comes to thyroid problems, as if one dosage is going to solve everything. In reality, for many people it's a complicated, often tedious process that is well worth it if you can find relief.

Quackwatch.org tries very hard to completely discredit Armour Thyroid and the doctors who prescribe it by telling you to be "wary" of anyone who dispenses it. Funny, but I bet there are lots of people who have been totally let down by synthetic hormones who would love to find a competent doctor to prescribe them desiccated thyroid. Again, all those people who manage to do well on it must be crazy. They try to paint a dismal picture about the effectiveness and potency of Armour, while synthetic hormones have had exactly the same problems.

(Ironically, I googled the guy's name who runs Quackwatch and found that he was misrepresenting himself as a licensed psychiatrist during court proceedings he was asked to participate in as an "expert." He also apparently has ties to the FDA, which explains his distrust of physicians who will prescribe Armour.)

Depending on the nature of your remaining symptoms - say, depression is one of them - it's often perceived that you're "fine" because your TSH is "normal" and you're taking meds. So let's treat your depression. Or any of the other slew of problems you have that are unknowingly caused by your thyroid and the crappy management of it. That will require a few more scripts, some of which are astronomically expensive. High blood pressure and cholesterol levels? Hey, there's a drug for those. Instead of taking one thyroid medication to address the root cause, let's put you on a number of meds that address each symptom, until your medicine cabinet looks like a mini pharmacy.

When you consider how pervasive hypothyroidism is, and yet how under-treated (or improperly treated) it is, it makes you wonder. It seems like more of a scam to get you to spend lots of money on unnecessary prescriptions. More and more people are feeling lied to, like our doctors want - and expect - us to completely, blindly trust them and just suffer the consequences when they are wrong. Considering there are other treatments out there, they should let that decision ultimately be made by the patient - and counsel you accordingly - instead of distort or hide information.

More reading:
Generic drugs and patent information - Wikipedia
Thyroid Disease, Hypothyroidism and Fibromyalgia - about.com

The Deranged Housewife.... crafts!

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 15:15:00 +0000

Call it a beginning of the year inspiration, maybe the coffee's kicking in.... but I've been debating on what to do for months with the craft blog I (don't) maintain. Yes, there is another.... said in my best Darth Vader voice. I have a craft blog, and for the longest time I've been wondering what to do with it.

I haven't maintained it in over a year, but it's obvious someone's watching/reading (really?!). One of my photos got lots of hits, which means crafty people like me are searching the net for ideas and perhaps got something out of my blog. Wonders never cease! So perhaps that was the impetus for me finally getting off my butt and doing something about it, by announcing it here. Just so you know I do more than eat, sleep, dream, write, breathe and talk birth and all things pregnancy-related.

I've been an (mostly) avid sewer since I was a kid, and have periods where I wax and wane when it comes to crafting in my Woman Cave. But hopefully maintaining this blog will help me to be more motivated to share with others who might be interested. I hope you enjoy what you see! And I hope I can remember to post more often!

Click here: Craftiest Mom on the Block

On birth suites and breastfeeding: what a busy week!

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Sun, 15 Jan 2012 03:17:00 +0000

I've been slacking - I'm supposed to be writing posts about thyroid awareness, but considering the busy week the entertainment industry's been having, I couldn't help but get distracted!

Beyonce's Birth Suite
First, Beyonce had her baby. Woo. I know, I'm like the 400th person to write a blog post about it, and really, it doesn't matter to me whether she had a natural birth or a cesarean. Well, in some ways it matters, yes - but not in the way some people think it does. Without rehashing too much of what everyone else has said, I do think how a woman gives birth matters: in the sense that surgical births are completely downplayed and approached with almost a blasé attitude, to the point where vaginal births - normal ones, anyway - are almost considered "old-fashioned." If she got the birth she wanted, then great - either way. When the entire world thought she had a cesarean at 37 weeks for breech, though, I wondered aloud, "What if this is the best information she had at the time? Many of us, including myself, have been there."

Photo: TMZ

Anyway, once photos of her birth suite were leaked, it got me thinking: why does someone have to be of "celebrity" or important status to have a comfortable, homey-looking place like this? Why do the rest of us get relegated to a double room with a complaining, loud roommate and plastic furniture?

I thought back to my own births. I gave birth to three children in two hospitals. My first was a cesarean, I was ill-informed, scared, and alone. My husband wasn't allowed to stay overnight with me, despite the fact there was a very empty bed next to mine the entire time I was there. Nurses ignored my repeated requests for pain medication, despite the obvious fact that something was wrong, and it was just a miserable experience overall. When my baby was born, he was quickly shown to me and then taken out in the hallway to be weighed and measured - which my husband witnessed - as I lay on the operating table, hearing his first cries. I thought to myself, I've just given birth, but this is so freaking surreal. I want to hold my child. When my husband cried tears of joy, they actually asked him if he was going to be okay, like something was wrong with him. Seriously?!

When it was time to get up and move around for the first time, I was in such pain I felt like my body was being seared in half. The nurse was unsympathetic. They actually told me to go get my own breakfast. I was confused, half-drugged with drugs that only half-worked, wondering where I was supposed to go to get it. Someone felt sorry for me and brought me a turkey sandwich. I thought this was odd, considering when I had my VBAC two years later (the birth I could have done cartwheels after) they brought me all my meals. What?

For many women, just to have an unmedicated birth, they have to practically fight tooth and nail for it. Many are laughed at when they walk into the doctor's office with a birth plan. Many don't want anything all that special, except to maybe keep vaginal exams to a minimum, dim the lights and let them push in a position that feels comfortable to them, instead of to the doctor. In other words, they want their personal space respected as much as humanly possible, instead of be made to feel like a human science experiment, especially when it isn't necessary.

It's sad that we can't afford more laboring women the comforts of home within the "safe" confines of a hospital setting, since most people think hospitals are the best, safest place to give birth. Fine. Birthing centers seem to offer the best of both worlds, if you can find one. I know my city doesn't have any, that's for sure.

I think only within the last four or five years did my hospital convert their maternity rooms to private. In fact, there are those that can be reserved - as if you're a celebrity - but of course there's so few of them that they often get taken first. Birthing tubs and jacuzzis? Only four, available first-come, first-serve. I was denied access to them with my second birth because I was having a VBAC. Whatever. Apparently waterproof dopplers hadn't yet been invented in 2006. *eyeroll*

(Although they do mention CPMs, how they can lower infection and cesarean rates, fewer complications and healthier outcomes, based on WHO recommendations. So I'll give them that.)

Although hospitals go through expensive remodeling projects and blab endlessly about having expensive equipment to 'ensure you the best outcome,' it seems like they pour all their money into technology - which hasn't been shown to improve outcomes - and ignore some of the basics, like getting rid of that damned plastic furniture.

Seeing Beyonce's birth suite photos just reminds you of how in the Dark Ages many hospitals are when it comes to serving laboring women. And consider this - roughly only five percent are considered "Mother-baby friendly."

Sesame Street and breastfeeding in public
Like it hasn't already been done before, some think that breastfeeding should be "brought back" to The Street. I don't say that in a sarcastic tone - but mainly to say to all the haters, "It's already been done before. Twice. I don't remember hearing a lot of hoopla over it then or since, until now. One viewer remembers in retrospect:

Buffy breastfed Dakota in one episode; a former Canadian politician recently commented that "I remember seeing that and thinking about how proud she made aboriginal women because nursing is a part of our culture. During those days it was kind of a hidden thing, so to see Buffy doing it on Sesame Street was really something."

I've been embroiled in a heated, rather idiotic debate on Facebook over the last few days with some people who think it's wrong. I have repeated myself at least three or four times: "It's already been done before, twice, and no one raised a stink about it then." Someone complained, "Our tax dollars at work!" I corrected him and said, "Actually, the US government subsidizes half of the infant formula consumed in this country." No response. I don't think anyone actually bothers to read any of the comments before issuing their own thoughtful gem. What a bunch of idiots.

Some argued that that kind of thing "should be taught at home," and compared it with bodily fluids and functions (as usual) - even going so far as to say, "What next? Abortions? Conception?" I mean, come on. The reason these people don't see many women nursing in public anymore is because numbskulls like them have effectively driven women to either choose formula because they don't want to run the risk of their baby getting hungry in public, or they are currently feeding their child in a disgusting toilet stall somewhere.

And how can you teach something at home when that behavior, for whatever reason, isn't modeled at home? That's just the way it is, unfortunately. Kids are less likely to learn about something they're never going to see.

Many of the people who complained have probably never seen a woman nurse in public, or if they did, they didn't realize it. When they hear the word "breast" they immediately think "full frontal nudity," pasties and dancing around like you're a stripper.

I pointed out that, until formula started heavily being marketed to mothers, women nursing in public, tops open, was not unusual. As the formula industry moved into hospitals at an alarming rate, the sexual revolution gave way to an attitude that changed our ideas about what breasts were for, and, I think, the porn industry found new and more convenient outlets to reinforce those ideas. Before, public, open breastfeeding was normal and seen every day, and sex was not. Suddenly, those roles were reversed: sex was brought out into the spotlight, de-shamed, and breastfeeding was relegated to the back closet as old-fashioned and "dirty." Now people argue that if you're a breastfeeding mother, you should just "stay at home." But if you want to flash cleavage at all times for no reason, well - that's okay, I guess.

Where's Maria when you need her?

More reading:
You're my baby (bottled-fed version) - Sesame Street
Does breastfeeding belong on Sesame Street? - San Francisco Gate

Why I don't use my real name - here or on Facebook

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Tue, 10 Jan 2012 17:11:00 +0000

I've toyed with the idea over the past three years of blogging to finally reveal my real identity. I was this close to doing so, perhaps in an effort for "transparency" (I hate that term) and then something happened. I think it was in the midst of Mrs. BWF's blow up over on her blog Birth Without Fear and all the trouble she was having with trolls that finally did it for me. I took a lesson from her: do not give out your real name except to those whom you really trust. We've either been in the middle of it or seen it from the sidelines, but you do have to admit - there is quite a bit of snark going on in the birth nerd world.

It's estimated that 27 percent
of users on FB are fake.
So what?

Not that I don't trust all the wonderful people who read my blog, "like" my fan page and friend me through my anonymous account on Facebook, but you get the idea.

This morning when I logged into my Deranged Housewife FB account, I was blocked from entering, presumably because they are going through a "fake name" purge and decided I was on the list. Fine, whatever. I realize they have those policies for a reason, but it is not the paragon of security and honest social networking they'd like to think it is, and they're not really fooling anyone. It's often been said that privacy settings are hard to figure out, more complicated than they should be, and it's no secret to anyone that they purposefully try to get you to share more than most people would be comfortable with. (Just check out what they consider 'default settings' sometime and you'll see what I mean.)

I've heard people say, "I don't care, I've got nothing to hide." Perhaps. But yes, in some ways we all have something to hide: considering identity theft is a huge problem, and (from what I've heard) FB's new policies on harassment actually make it easier to harass people than hinder the process, I think many people should rethink how much they want to share. Some of us are having a hard time because of policies that immediately think you're spamming or doing something evil simply because you don't want to share what they consider relevant details (name and birthdate).

Who, really, needs to know my real birthdate? I mean, what does it really matter to the social networking world? I find it scary, considering if you did know my real name and birthdate, you could probably - just by those two kernels of information - find out where I live, and where I have lived, in the past decade. (Check out that site "Intelius," I'm sure you've seen it.) Is FB really that stupid?

Because of that brand new "ticker" feature, I can see content on fan pages that I'm not supposed to see because I don't subscribe (which is against their TOS, too, apparently). One classic example of why people use fake accounts is when they subscribe to groups - one such group is a haven for people with illness to connect and share ideas about their condition. The only problem was, because certain information can't be hidden, and thanks to that damned ticker, their problems were blasted to everyone on their friends list. They'd come back and say, "So and so said, 'I didn't know you were sick.' Or "You just use your illness as an excuse,' kind of thing," because they can read so and so's comments on that group. I responded, "Yeah, like I really want everyone to know that "XYZ Disease has killed my sex drive!" I'm sure that would go over well. Using a fake account means they can more openly share information without having to worry about "friends" listening in on the conversation. (Again, there may be super-duper complicated privacy settings to switch somewhere in the bowels of your FB account that can change all that, but who knows, really.)

I've read that upwards of 27 percent of people use fake names. Not all of them are malicious spammers; some just want to get around the 'filter' that means they can't vent their feelings, true thoughts and frustrations when grandma, Pastor So and So and perhaps a gossipy aunt are watching. And you know they are. Can't FB understand this? I have actually seen several custody disputes and family arguments unfold on FB, and it's sad and scary to think those people can't even say anything without someone jumping on the defensive. And honestly, if I shared half of the birth nerd info on my 'real' profile that I do on my "business" one, no one would comment, few would "like," and I'm sure I'd get unfriended several times over.

There is that "lists" feature (or whatever you want to call it) that separates people into groups based on your criteria - but I wonder if many people know how to use it. And if you have to go to a separate (non-FB) tutorial just to learn how to use some of their crazy complicated security features, then it means things should probably be simplified a bit. I bet many people don't even realize how much info they share on any given day and they would probably be horrified. We can tell them "Don't use it, then!" all we want, but for some, this is the primary - albeit flawed, perhaps - way they contact friends, relatives and business contacts. (When an older relative asks me "Should I get on Facebook?" I often bluntly tell them, "No - you'll never be able to figure out their privacy settings.")

As for my personal account, I've taken myself out of Google search, Facebook search, instant personalization (yeah, what a joke) and all the stuff I can think of and it still doesn't seem to help. On my anonymous account, I don't care who knows what I'm reading, when I'm reading it; on my private account? Heck yeah, I care, so stop sharing that info even though I've unchecked that stupid box 100 times already and it doesn't seem to change anything. Months ago, my relatives were getting fake requests from Facebook users who claimed to be friends with me, even though I had no idea who they were. How'd they know who to target? Who knows. (The only link I can make is that data between my email account and Facebook was shared. I never did find out the answer to that one.)

When it comes to the business of FB friends, it's rather perplexing. If you get too many of them, they don't like it. If they suspect that you've sent too many friend requests (even though you haven't) they don't like it. Apparently they want you to be a social butterfly, but only to a certain point.

Last night my husband and I were watching a movie about the Nazis, and at one point they mentioned how the gestapo were made up of very few people, who relied solely on the reports of common citizens to do their jobs. Well, it's kind of the same thing at FB: they have, apparently, very few employees worldwide as compared to the number of users, and depend on others to report every seemingly offensive political, religious, or breastfeeding post that just might offend someone. Sound scary? It should. If only we knew just how many people - people who are supposedly acquaintances and friends, otherwise people you trusted - "turn in" someone for content that just happened to make them mad. Yet the "F*ck Jesus/Christians/Islam" fan pages are still up and running, despite numerous complaints and reports.

When you think about it, the age of internet use, sharing information and social networking is both revolutionary and some scary sh!t. Think for a moment about all the information you're required to submit when you sign up for an online account - whether it's with Facebook, a cooking website, even your bank - and then think of all the people out there who are trying, sometimes successfully, to gain access to that data. There have been security breaches at bank companies (my credit card number was compromised in just such a breach just a few months ago), and FB has admitted to losses of data in recent months and years because of hackers. And they get mad because there are some details you'd rather keep private, even though you can easily prove you mean no ill will?

If you're spamming people with bogus friend requests, porn pictures or other stupid products, it's going to show up on someone's wall. It will be obvious. But if you've never received a complaint from anyone, and have the public wall to prove that the links you share are anything but spam, then honestly I don't know why they get their shorts in such a bunch. They want to maintain credibility, says their CEO, because if it were loaded with fake accounts then "no one would take them seriously." Seriously?! I think it's way too late for that.

In the meantime, I'm not sure what I plan to do. I have considered trying to reactive my blogging profile, gather any pertinent information I need and close it, using FB under my fan page. I hesitate to send personal information to verify my name (although FB encourages you to blot out any other personal details and promises (pinky swear!) that they will immediately shred all details as soon as the information has been verified. I hate hate hate to lose the wonderful artwork I've posted, and all the friends I've made, if they don't get the memo, will go up in smoke. I really want you all to know how important you are to me: the wonderful connections we've made, conversations shared and ideas exchanged has been more fulfilling than you'll ever know! Many of you interact with me on a regular basis and have almost become friends (in more than a FB sense, I guess) and I would be terribly upset if those connections were broken forever.

Stay tuned and please, keep in touch!

More reading:
Why the number of people using fake names on Facebook is increasing (or something) - I don't know who wrote this article, but a lot of their assumptions are totally stupid.
Real users caught in Facebook fake name purge - God forbid your mother gives you a name like 'Anakin' because no one at Facebook will really believe you.
Facebook privacy settings are too complicated
Facebook Privacy: a bewildering tangle of options - NY Times

Testing your thyroid: why you can't always trust the TSH

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Sat, 07 Jan 2012 15:21:00 +0000

For years, my wonderful gastroenterologist was testing my thyroid (or so I thought) and the results were always "normal!" I thought nothing of it until last winter, when I became concerned that I felt crummy more often than not. Things I used to love doing now seemed like a huge chore, and housework and laundry felt like the most unsurmountable tasks ever.

My mom kept asking me, "Have you had your thyroid checked?" I insisted that yes, it's been checked, and yes, it's normal. She told me how unreliable the TSH can often be for some people, and I dismissed it as more of her "woo" medicine. Until I started making a mental note of how I felt and decided to look into it. What a shocker I was in for.

Many of the symptoms I was experiencing showed up on lists all over the internet, including an explanation of why the often-hailed TSH can sometimes leave many people under treated or even undiagnosed. I learned to be wary of doctors who told me that the TSH was the 'best way' to determine if you had a thyroid problem.

The TSH is kind of like a complex math problem: it's one component of the equation, but without the other numbers, it might not make much sense. It could look okay on its own, but not really be complete. By only looking at the TSH, it is a very misleading piece of the puzzle, when in fact there's much more that needs to be considered before solving the problem.

Photo credit: thevreelandclinic.wordpress.com

Before the TSH blood test was invented in the 1970s, doctors often paid attention to the symptoms a patient was experiencing. While not always a perfect science, I think it also reflected how more patient-centered the medical profession used to be; now with the advent of more tests and drugs to treat everything, we've definitely gone in the opposite direction. The TSH test was developed with a pool of approximately 200 volunteers (that's it?!) to test for 'normal' ranges of thyroid function, and has been used as a guideline ever since. The problem is, not everyone is the same - some people can feel relatively great with a higher TSH than others, and some feel like crap when their TSH is in the normal range. To confuse you even further, even though there are clear guidelines established, different labs use different "normal ranges."

Some thyroid advocates argue that since hypothyroidism is so prevalent, the volunteers themselves were not really 'normal' and our guidelines are false. As our medical community moved away from a more individualized approach to medicine and pharmaceuticals became more widely available, doctors treated blood tests as all-encompassing methods to diagnose patients, which has backfired for many who fall within gray areas of the spectrum.

Just among the friends that I've talked to, I know that my neighbor is on medication (a higher dose than I am, even) and yet she said she had no symptoms. Without trying to pry, I concluded that her TSH must have been high and that her doctor was simply doing routine blood work (wow!). Someone else I know said that her TSH "was at the high end of normal" and her doctor didn't think she needed medication just yet, even though she is the most miserably tired-looking person I think I've ever met. I tried to explain it to her gently, but of course since I'm not a doctor my opinion is invalid. She is definitely someone I think who could benefit from treatment, but I guess she'll just have to wait until her TSH explodes off the charts before she gets it.

Normal reference ranges for TSH function have been changed within the last few years, and are from 0.3-3.0. Before that, 0.5-5.0 were considered "normal." And still, I read of physicians who refuse to treat someone with a TSH hovering at 5.0, acting as if everything is all in the patient's head. In comments read around the web, one patient said her doctor routinely doesn't treat you until your TSH is above 10. Time to find a new doctor!

One patient tells her story about having trouble reaching her normal weight (that she had maintained for years) and asked her doctor about the possibility of a thyroid problem.

I scheduled an appointment with my doctor. I explained why I thought I may be having thyroid problems. He just laughed at me, when I suggested I might be hypothyroid. I even took my documented temperature readings, plus hypothyroid symptoms with me, but he discounted them all. He said temperature readings to test for hypothyroidism dated back to the 1920's. He intimated that since at 130lbs I wasn't "fat" by medical standards, I therefore couldn't possibly have a problem with my thyroid. I still insisted on blood tests to check TSH (thyroid stimulating hormone) levels. This test came back showing a TSH level of 6.7, and in Canada, the reference range of 0.5 - 4.5 means, "No Problem", 4.5 - 10 means "Euthryoid - perhaps there may be a problem developing" and > 10 means "Possibly we had better treat the patient." Now this is where the issue starts getting murky. You see, the American Endocrinology Association and the British Medical Journal have all (for years) been saying that these reference ranges are incorrect, that since thyroid problems are actually extremely common (especially in women), that these numbers include large numbers of people with underlying thyroid problems - thus the numbers are skewed and actually anything > 2 (some say 2.5) should be treated as "suspect".

So, anyhow, despite my many symptoms such as dry skin, thinning hair, memory problems, low temperature, emotional spells, low energy at times, and now a TSH of 6.72 (obviously greater than the new TSH reference ranges) my doctor was unimpressed and wrote "Euthryoid" on my form and sent me packing.

This attitude prevails, even though TSH guidelines have been lowered in an attempt to diagnose more missed patients who fall through the cracks.

If your TSH is within normal limits, they will often ignore your symptoms. If it's high, it often means the majority of the damage to your thyroid has already been done. It doesn't mean it's too late to treat it, but it often signifies that thyroid damage has slowly been occurring for years before you finally pieced two and two together and sought treatment. This is why the most common cause of hypothyroidism is Hashimoto's Disease, which is an autoimmune precursor that begins to destroy the thyroid gland first (more on this later).

If your TSH is normal, it doesn't mean that damage isn't occurring. It just means that oftentimes it's not that bad yet that it's registering on a blood test. There are other tests that can be done, including ones that examine each level of thyroid hormone and how your body is converting that hormone into energy. Also, antibody tests can be ordered (peroxidase and thyroglobulin) to determine if you have Hashimoto's. However, beware: a certain percentage of the population do have Hashi's but do not have elevated antibodies; just because you don't doesn't mean you don't have a thyroid disorder. If your doctor is reluctant to order any thyroid tests, or wants to adhere strictly to the TSH, question his position or find a new doctor who will take you more seriously.

If left untreated (or under-treated), thyroid disease can cause major complications such as heart disease, diabetes, depression, infertility and other autoimmune diseases. Unfortunately, the modern medical approach is to treat symptoms instead of the root cause, which could explain why so many Americans are being treated with expensive drugs for diabetes, depression and high cholesterol. In fact, upwards of 20 percent of people treated for depression may really have underlying hypothyroidism that is undiagnosed. There's also evidence to suggest that hypothyroidism "brain fog" can mimic symptoms of fibromyalgia Alzheimer's, which means more expensive medications to treat the symptom rather than the root cause (and true Alzheimer's can only be diagnosed with autopsy).

The bottom line: when it comes to thyroid disease, there is no "normal," it seems. Healthcare professionals are too quick to put you in a neat, tidy little box that explains - or dismisses - your symptoms entirely. This could explain why so many people say "My doctor refuses to order more blood tests," or "My doctor refuses to put me on medication" - because they're either stuck to ridiculous, often flawed guidelines or are attempting to treat something that they don't fully understand.

More reading:
Rethinking the TSH Test - Mary Shomon interviews Dr. David Derry

Understanding and diagnosing thyroid problems

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Tue, 03 Jan 2012 15:25:00 +0000

I feel like crap all the time and I want to know why!

Considering that there are anywhere from 20 to 27 million people with thyroid disorders in the US alone, you might wonder, Do I have this? I used to think it was mostly something that old people got - before really talking to people about it, my elderly grandma was the only one I knew who had this condition. I didn't know anything about it: where the thyroid was, what it looked like, or why we even had one. What is it good for, anyway?

The answer: just about everything! It's amazing to think that such a small part of the body could be responsible for so much - basically every system in the body is regulated by the thyroid gland, a butterfly-shaped organ located at the base of the throat. We'd like to think that when something goes wonky with a part of our bodies that we'd know about it, but that's not always the case.

For an organ so small, it does have a major job to do: it affects all the other glands of the body, which in turn regulate our other body systems. So if something is off with the thyroid gland, you can bet other things will follow sooner or later.

Since I'm no endocrinologist, and the study of the thyroid can get rather complicated, I'll try and simplify it as much as possible. In fact, even some doctors don't really have a full understanding of how it works, which can be extremely frustrating for patients. While my primary doctor is okay, at least he is open to trying other forms of medication and ordering regular blood tests. Some people complain that their doctor won't even let them order a simple blood test to check things out. Seriously?! I think it's because they're afraid of what they'll find, and even more, they won't know what to do with the information they receive.

I found one such article that sums that up pretty well:

What the heck does the thyroid gland do? Most physicians will tell you “it controls metabolism,” which is what we all learned in medical school. That statement is basically the same as saying “it’s really complicated and I don’t understand it.” - Dr. Rob Lamberts

If you don't know much about your condition, and your doctor doesn't really know, either, then that can mean months, years, even - of feeling like crap when you don't have to.

The thyroid is responsible for our metabolism, which, by definition is "The chemical processes that occur within a living organism in order to maintain life." Sounds pretty important! In a nutshell, it affects every cell in the body and how it uses energy. It does this by absorbing iodine from our food supply to produce essential thyroid hormones.

The thyroid is controlled by the pituitary gland, which is really why when you have a TSH test (Thyroid stimulating hormone) done, it's more a determinant of how the pituitary is functioning. You can have a completely normal TSH result and yet still have symptoms, which is why some people go undiagnosed for years - but more on that later. The thyroid converts this iodine into important thyroid hormones - thyroxine (T4) and triiodothyronine (T3). In a normally functioning thyroid, the body converts the T4 (storage hormone) into T3 for energy. As a result, the body produces much less of the "business" hormone T3, because otherwise you would be hyperthyroid - when the thyroid is "sped up." This can happen either on its own or if you are being improperly treated with medications.

When thyroid levels become too low, the pituitary produces more TSH, which in turn makes the thyroid produce more hormones. As a result, someone with hypothyroidism would often - but not always - have a high TSH.

If you've felt like crap for years or are wondering if you're hypo, there is quite an extensive list of symptoms, depending on who you consult. Unfortunately, many of the lists can say completely different things, which I always found confusing and frustrating. Don't ever underestimate the power of your thyroid gland to screw things up; if in doubt, google it and see for yourself.

Symptoms can include:
• feeling cold all the time
• low energy and fatigue, wanting to sleep all the time
• hair loss, loss of outer eyebrow hair
• depression or feeling extremely unmotivated
• low sex drive (more on that later!)
• dry skin
• constipation
• swelling, especially in the face
• pain and stiffness in your joints
• heavier (or sometimes lighter) than usual periods
• infertility or repeated miscarriages
• brain fog and/or memory loss
• muscle cramps and aches
• irritability
• weight gain, even with diet and exercise
• increased cholesterol
• consistently low body temperature
• shortness of breath
• dry, brittle nails
• dizziness and headaches
• migraines
• easily upset or emotional, scares easily
• choking easily
• feeling lumps or sensations in your throat

It's important to note that in some people, symptoms creep up very gradually, and are often dismissed as something else - we often contribute many of these things to "just getting old." Well, I call BS!

I went to several websites to come up with somewhat of a comprehensive list of symptoms for this list, because many times they are very inadequate. I have also consulted my father-in-law's Physicians Desk Reference and noticed, almost amused, that according to their list you'd practically have to be dead before they'd stand up and take note. There's a difference, to them, between symptoms and "signs" - symptoms are things you complain about and only you notice going on inside you, and signs are those outward things (like near heart failure, she says sarcastically) that a doctor can see going on. For example, goiter, or enlarged neck, would be a "sign." (But who really wants to have to wait until their neck swells up like a balloon? Oh wait... been there, done that...)

Granted, everyone is different, and not everyone will experience a full range of symptoms, or even close. Some can have relatively high TSH numbers and feel great; others, like myself, can be in the "normal range" and still feel like crap. I had to laugh when I consulted the almost pathetic list at Wikipedia - which lists a set of common and uncommon symptoms. Some were indeed abnormal and rare, and others on that uncommon list were actually quite common! What the heck?

Even more annoying is when patients give the run down of complaints to physicians who don't know what all the comprehensive symptoms even are. Apparently, yes - shortness of breath can be a symptom of hypo and not just hyperthyroidism; and yet often I was feeling like I literally needed to gasp for breath. My doctor assumed it was anxiety; I told him I was not anxious. I explained how I would literally have to stop for breath just while reading a bedtime story to my kids. How is that anxiety?

Considering how prevalent hypothyroidism is, I don't know why more doctors don't do regular panels on their patients just to prevent them from falling through the cracks. Some don't know what the full range of symptoms are and just think it's normal for them. Some don't know their family history, some don't understand how it can affect them and what it means for their diagnosis. While it can affect men as well, it is more commonly inherited from mother to daughter.

It's important to not only understand the basics of how your thyroid works and what it should be doing, but take a proactive role in finding a physician who will take your complaints seriously. If possible, it's very helpful to know your family history, know your treatment options and know your rights as a patient so you can feel your best.

January is Thyroid Awareness Month!

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Mon, 02 Jan 2012 14:00:00 +0000

What a perfect time of year to have "Thyroid Awareness Month" - the weather is usually cold, dreary and generally yuk outside, and a time when most people are just ready for spring to hurry up and get here. Is it just the weather making you feel unmotivated and crappy, or could it be your thyroid?

Thyroid disorders affect millions of Americans. Are you
one of them?

As a recent newcomer to the thyroid scene, I have talked to many, many people who have thryoid problems and are on medication. Some of those same people, I've noticed, are taking meds and yet have no idea what their thyroid does or how important it is to their overall health. Others are merely vaguely aware of basically feeling like shit more often than not, but aren't really sure why. There's no time like the present to evaluate your overall health, take stock in how you feel and discovering that perhaps there is a reason for why you feel the way you do.

Hypothyroidism can affect both men and women, and can often be the root cause of many other underlying illnesses and problems in the body - from weight gain and general tiredness, to arthritis, high cholesterol, diabetes, depression, repeated miscarriages, infertility, low breast milk supply, among other things.

Some quick facts on thyroid diseases:

• Thyroid disease is the most common endocrine disorder.
• Eight out of ten (80 percent) diagnosed thyroid cases are hypothyroid; 20 percent are hyperthyroid.
• 27 million people in the US, and approximately 200 million worldwide, have a thyroid disorder.
• Of that 27 million, about half are considered undiagnosed.
• As of 2010, sales of Synthroid, the most popular drug used to treat hypothyroidism, went up 18.1% to $123 million.

Paging Joe's mom.... Do you know where your son is?

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Sat, 31 Dec 2011 19:07:00 +0000

The days before and after Christmas are some of the busiest shopping times of the year, and you'll likely find throngs of people all over the malls. Yesterday I headed to the mall and the place was packed - I wanted to turn around and go home immediately. As I headed into the mall, I saw a little girl hanging out in the entrance to a store, by herself. I glanced inside and saw some people, but have no idea if they were her parents or not.

Photo credit: jmlfoundation.org

Twenty-some minutes later, as I was leaving, I saw her again, still standing in the entrance. I thought about how easily someone could come along and grab her, the place packed with people, and that would be the end of it. Would anyone notice?

A few weeks ago, I went to Kohl's and headed for the fitting room to try something on. There was one other woman in there, and a kid a little older than my son a few doors down, playing in one of the fitting rooms. I was attempting to try on a pair of jeans, but as this kid flopped himself on the floor to peek at us from underneath the partition, I was a little unnerved. Why isn't his mother saying anything? I thought.

Then the other woman left the fitting room and I realized, that's not his mother.

As I came out of the fitting room, I saw no one else around. No other women were frantically calling for a child, no one was crawling around through the racks, looking for a child hiding inside. The little boy came out, smiled at me and then ran away somewhere. I thought it was strange, but continued shopping. Then I saw him again. Back in the fitting rooms, here, there and everywhere. I found another shopper and asked her apprehensively, "Does this child belong to you?"

"No," she said, looking at me like, I know - I've seen him all over the store, too and it bothers me as much as it does you. We kind of looked at each other like, "Wow," and I said, "He's just wandering around in the fitting room all by himself." She answered something to the effect of, "I don't see any panicked moms looking for him, either."

I managed to snag an employee who was walking by and said something to her. It was about then that the boy came out of nowhere and I heard "Joe! Joe! Where are you?" from in the distance. Was this the elusive mother?

As she was leaving, I overheard her say, "I figured you were running around, doing something stupid." Wow.

I don't want to turn into the world's biggest helicopter parent, but sometimes I think there is such a thing as too much freedom. We live in such a messed up world that one chance encounter can change a child's life, and there's no taking it back. I often look around while shopping and think, Wow, if I were a kidnaper, it would be so easy to just up and walk away with someone's kid. I think about my own children, my son riding his bike around the quadrangle behind our house, and how close we are to a major highway that leads to a major city, and not that far away, another country. How there are often groups of completely strange people hanging around to use buildings for public functions, basketball games, retreats, etc.

Perhaps I'm paranoid. And some people will say that cases of child abduction aren't so much on the rise as we just hear about it more. Perhaps this is true, because such behavior towards children has been around since the dawn of time. I do think we hear about it more, because our society has taken the shame and terror of child abduction and is giving it the screen time it deserves. Before, we never much heard about it - kids disappeared, and pretty much no one would ever know what happened to them. (Ever heard of the Lindbergh baby kidnaping case?) The fact remains that protecting children seems to be taking more of a front seat, instead of sweeping it under the rug, and you can't argue with that.

Easy access to child porn on the internet, I think, is another driving force. It's everywhere, including the images and ideas that our children should grow up way before their time. I don't doubt, in some way, that people who target children find this provocative behavior somewhat alluring. The images of the ten-year-old French model dressed, and made-up, like a fully grown woman come to mind. It almost makes your stomach turn.

I've blogged about this before, but when my son started kindergarten at a Catholic school, volunteers had to go through an extensive, almost mentally exhausting training session that included learning how to identify and report child abuse and inappropriate behavior. It included interviews from the abusers themselves, what they "look for" in a kid (disgusting) and how incredibly easy it is too fool everyone - even parents - into trusting them around children. Jerry Sandusky fits the profile perfectly - including the idea in his own mind that he's innocent, that even though he did extremely questionable things, that it's okay and everyone else has the problem, not him.

I know that the majority of kidnapings are done by members of a child's family, like a disgruntled parent embroiled in a custody battle. That's not even what I'm talking about - because as painful as it would be for the other parent, at least you would know (most of the time, anyway) that your child would be safe because he or she is with a parent. I know statistics show that children are more likely to be abused by a friend of the family or relative than a complete stranger. While that's true, it is still entirely plausible that a child can make contact with someone at the wrong time, ending in tragedy. When you're halfway across the store and don't even know what your kid is doing at the moment, it seems like a recipe for disaster. Finding age-appropriate boundaries can be tough, but necessary, but the key is age appropriate. I'd guess Joe was about four, not even; that is not what I'd call age appropriate. And the fact that mom didn't appear worried is what worries me even more.

We can argue that we're only hearing about abuse and tragic events more now because of our increased access to media and the news; perhaps. But this is not the same world as it was in 1964, that's for sure. When a child and her parents can stage a public altercation in which a perfect stranger pretends to know the child, but is really attempting to kidnap her, and no one comes to her aid - even though she's yelling and screaming - what then? One kid can navigate his way home in New York City and do just fine; another, trusted with the same responsibility, ends up dead because some random stranger decided to target him.

It can be emotionally difficult to cut the apron strings, that's for sure. But I don't want to assume anything - namely that I can trust people anymore - by making it even easier for them.

More reading:
Child Abduction Facts - Parents magazine
Child abduction statistics

Nursing in Public and the Target Controversy

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Thu, 29 Dec 2011 02:32:00 +0000

Today I had to go to Target and specifically went to one out of my way in hopes of meeting up with some mothers who were involved in the Target Nurse-In. Somehow, I read about a local protest going on in my area that the news reported on (somewhat snarkily, I might add) where five women got together in the Target cafe to do their thing. I got there too late (or somehow expected them to be milling around the store, babes in hand LOL) but managed to read some idiotic comments on the article when I got home from shopping.

I bet none of the people who left a comment even saw any of the women in question. And because Target wouldn't allow cameras into the store (which is pretty common practice) we could only get a shot of the back of one woman and the top of her baby's head. If I saw the picture out of context, I wouldn't have even realized she was actually nursing a baby.

People used the typical phrases, "Go somewhere else," or "Find a private place," with proclamations of not wanting to see bodily functions - almost like you're comparing breast milk to sputum or diarrhea. Well, that "bodily function" sure saved me a lot of money when it came to feeding my babies. And if you want to look at it that way - yes, it's a function of your body, which means it was designed to do it. Doesn't mean you have to, but if you weren't meant to you'd be born with two cans of Enfamil strapped to your chest instead.

As I cruised around the store I saw one woman in the baby bottle aisle contemplating which one to choose. Maybe she was shopping for herself, maybe not, but I couldn't help but feel an invisible pang that said "You don't really need that stuff!" Yes, yes, I know there are many women out there who can't nurse: women with serious health issues, some who take dangerous medications, some who have other health issues that interfere with breast milk production that they don't even know about (more about that later in my upcoming series on thyroid disease). But I can't help but wonder if some of the biggest obstructions to nursing mothers (or potential nursing mothers) is psychological.

I don't know if I want to come right out and call people lazy. But there might be some truth in that, some of which isn't even their fault. Nursing is sometimes hard work for people, and I have the utmost admiration and awe for those who succeed, or try their damnedest, to make it work despite the odds. Pumping, working mothers? Oh how I respect them, because I know not everyone can stay home all the time to nurse their child whenever he wants the boob. Women who have tried every supplement on earth and still nothing works? You bet.

I think the modern age of conveniences - like relatively cheap, easy-to-come-by infant formula, perhaps - have made us lazy, in a sense. The mentality of It's right there, just go ahead and use it! is very tempting. Old worn-out ideology about nursing ("Your breasts are too small," "Your nipples are too flat," "You can't feed a big baby") still manage to somehow prevail, which boggles my mind, and therefore creates in women the idea that they're broken and can't possibly work, so why try?

This mentality, I think, has been happening way before us: before we were born, maybe before our mothers were even born. The heavy marketing of cheap, ready to use infant formula (along with lots of other modern things that made our lives easier) swayed our mothers and grandmothers to think the very parts we were born with were somehow dirty, outdated, useless, and paved the way for something better, or just as good, at least. Once the idea that breasts are meant to be looked at, ogled, instead - and that you could display them as you wished because you were a woman and free to do so, if you liked - somehow replaced in our minds that breasts were first and foremost meant to feed a baby and now, we were free to talk at length about their other purpose.

Because of that mentality - the same one that took us from "breast is best and infant formula should be only used for sickly babies" to "formula is fine; why even bother with anything else?" - there's this psychological supposition of failure: That because your mother and grandmother "could never nurse," you might not be able to, either. That because your baby spits up on your three or four times, he has colic and your milk is "bad." That because he's "fussy," (whatever that means) that you should just go ahead and stop nursing because this stuff is better and you don't even have to do anything. Because "who wants a two-year-old sucking on your tit all day?" *sigh* We've gone from people who couldn't afford not to nurse to a nation that actually subsidizes it - by upwards of 50 percent of the total consumption.

That same psychology of failure is what leads many people to believe it's wrong, you can't do it, because it seems like they almost want you to fail because they did. Like, "Because I couldn't do it I'm going to complain at length about why you are." Perhaps they're jealous, I don't know. Maybe the reason they couldn't or didn't is because, like our generation, they get mostly crappy support. No one to quietly tell them, "Hey, great job!" "That's awesome!" or even, "I could never nurse my babies but I'm happy to see you doing it." It's another mommy war, in which people are still angry that someone else dare succeed where they have failed.

One older woman I know, and probably many like her, was given medication to dry up her breast milk - without even asking - because it was assumed she would formula feed. This wasn't even that long ago; sadly, one recent article I read said that few hospitals in the US fully supported nursing mothers in their breastfeeding relationship, even among those who expressly said they wanted to nurse. Disgusting.

People can tell you to "go somewhere private" all they want - but that's not always a foolproof plan, either. One time while shopping in Walmart, I had to nurse the baby so I retreated to a fitting room (which was fine with me; then I could get nice and relatively comfy). In the middle of nursing, a kid - probably ten years old - looked under the door for several seconds not once but twice, which I must say I found kind of annoying. I mean, modeling a perfectly normal breast-feeding relationship is one thing, but can we do it another time, perhaps? And where the heck is your mother, kid?

The majority of people in that article who complained, I bet, have never even seen a nursing mother expose herself. Much less even seen a woman nursing her baby in public. Sadly, I can't even remember seeing a nursing mother any time recently. I think the last time I did was almost two years ago at my son's school field trip, when the mother of my son's classmate was breastfeeding her baby. And then, I stared - in awe, not in shock - because I admired her for tucking herself in a shady little corner and discretely nursing her baby. I knew what she was doing, but saw no breasts, nothing - except a little bundle of love cradled in her mother's arms.

More reading:
Target employees bully breastfeeding mom despite corporate policy - Best for Babes
Breastfeeding mother 'told to leave council headquarters because it is a multicultural building' - Daily Mail
Breastfeeding mother asked to leave pool
Women-only gym asks mother to leave for breastfeeding son
Natalie Hegedus, Mom, Kicked out of courtroom for breastfeeding - Huffington Post
Kasey Kahne, NASCAR driver, tweets against breastfeeding in public - Huffington Post

Santa (isn't) coming to town

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 14:00:00 +0000

So it's official: my 8-year-old doesn't believe Santa is real. sniff sniff

I knew this day would come, of course. And I wondered - will he be traumatized and refuse to come out of his room for a week once he finds out, like all those critics and analysts say? Will he really think he's been lied to?

We do the Santa thing in our household, but don't go crazy or anything; one year of bad photos with Santa was enough for us and we haven't been back since. We do put up a tree, with an impressive, ever-growing collection of my homemade ornaments (help me, I can't stop) and some ornaments that actually have religious meaning (wait, is that possible?!). We're Christians, but understand full well the murky traditions that putting up a tree and telling our kids about Santa is all about, yet I don't begrudge any Christian I know who doesn't do those things.

I was told that Santa was "real" and never felt traumatized at that exact moment that I discovered he was just a tale that my family, everyone else's family and just about the entire commercial world had 'invented.' In fact, I don't even remember the exact moment when I stopped believing in him. I never felt lied to; that society had failed to protect me and that my parents had warped me forever. (Okay, I'm being a bit facetious here, but some of the things I read lately have sounded a bit like this).

I know a few church families who don't do the Santa thing, and kind of find it a bit sad. It always saddens me a little bit to hear a young whippersnapper who flatly states, "Santa isn't real" and moves on. Oh well, to each his own. Surprisingly, the Christian kids we know who don't believe in him have never taken my kids aside (well, until now, but that's okay) and told them, "Hey, you know what? Santa's fake! It's all your parents!" Their mother has nicely told them that some kids do believe it, and some don't. Thank you.

Her parents, interestingly enough, as Christians also told her and her brothers that Santa wasn't real, based on one event: another kid in church was also starting to question the existence of God because he'd found out Santa wasn't real. That one event (before they even had children, I think) turned them off from Santa forever and they assumed their kids just might question God too, if they were told Santa was a lie. Whatever. I'm not into taking it that far; besides, we talk about God all year long, not just a few weeks before Christmas.

A few weeks ago at my son's birthday party he and one of the above-mentioned church kids were talking in the other room, within earshot of his sister (who is five). I overheard bits and pieces of the conversation and asked him to repeat for me, privately, what would make your sister cry? He came over to me and said, "Oh, if Santa wasn't real. I said it would make her upset and she would cry." (She'd already been told by an older kid on the bus that Santa was a fake, and when she asked me about it, I neither confirmed nor denied; I think she doesn't want to believe that he isn't real. Fine with me.) I was impressed, however, how the boys were calmly discussing it as if it was the most obvious thing in the world: no tears, no shrieks, no running up to me and wailing, "How could you? How could you tell me that Santa was real when he really isn't?!" I was also very impressed that he wouldn't tell his sister, and would consider how upset she'd be if she knew The Truth.

I was wrapping presents the other night in my basement lair and as I saw two athletic-socked feet coming down the stairs, I started yelling. It was the only thing I could think to do at the time, trying to head him off before he saw everything laid out in plain sight. Of course he asked, "What are you doing, mom?" "NOTHING!" I cried, and told him to go back upstairs. "Oh," he said casually, "are you wrapping presents for me?"

What? That was it? Well then.

In years' past I have gone to great lengths while wrapping gifts to make the handwriting, even the color ink, on each tag from Santa look different than mine; all Santa's gifts were wrapped in the same paper. Not this year!

In a strange juxtaposition, my son still talks about Santa as if he does believe, which I find interesting and am paying attention to. Is it a force of habit? Is he doing it for the benefit of his sister? Or does part of him not really want to believe that Santa doesn't exist?

As a kid, I can remember gifts from my dad - some were from daddy and others were from "Santa." I knew the real truth by then, but it was still fun. Every year, I still click on the Norad Santa Tracker with anticipation, if not for my kids, myself - it's fun! For me, it's a lot of things: heavy snow falling outside our window, while we're tucked safely inside; Mannheim Steamroller playing, the tree lit and the candle lights shining in the window, a Salvation Army tuba player outside of Walmart. The spirit of it has stuck with me, even though I'm almost 40, and in some way I still "believe."

Do you "do" Santa? If your kids found out he wasn't real, were they upset?

What not to say to a mom

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Wed, 21 Dec 2011 13:55:00 +0000

"If you don't stop saying dumb things to my mommy,
I'm going to kick you in the shins and then go potty
in your cornflakes!"
Photo credit: roxinasz

If you're a mom with kids - or even just a woman - you've probably heard a whole host of idiotic things from family, acquaintances, even perfect strangers. If you even remotely do anything outside the norm, apparently, someone is sure to notice and say something. Again and again and again....

1. "You must have your hands full!" I hear this a lot when I'm out with my three kids, and while it's not necessarily mean, it just gets old after awhile. I want to say, "Actually, I just duct-tape them to the couch and turn on the television. That's the only way to get things done anymore!" I must hear this like 52 times in one outing, and anymore I just smile and nod, smile and nod.

2. "Oh, a boy and a girl! The perfect family!" This was said once when I was out shopping with my younger two children, who are a boy and a girl. Unfortunately, I have an older child who was at school that day - I almost felt bad for him. I think I said under my breath, "I have three children. Are we still the perfect family?"

3. "Are they all yours?!" This probably happens more once you dare to have four, maybe five kids - like they're taking over the planet or something.

4. "Do they all have the same father?" Yeah, that's a classic. Let me whip out their birth certificates for you. Aren't genetics a funny thing?

5. "When are you going to have kids/more kids?" Even childless women hear it too, and it's important for others to realize that not everyone is voluntarily childless. I felt bad after reading a comment from someone who often hears from strangers when she's going to have more kids, after she suffered a miscarriage. And no one should have to explain that they don't really desire to have kids, either.

6. "Aren't you done having kids yet?!" Apparently not, since I'm pregnant. Or you could say, "Actually, it's just gas!"

7. "You know how that happens, right?" I think this one should be met with a totally deadpan expression, followed by, "Whatever do you mean? Can you explain it to me?" with panic in your voice.

8. "Oh, two kids! Now you're done!" as if you've just completed a prison term or an order at JC Penney's or something. I heard this from someone once and thought, Funny, I don't remember ever discussing my fertility plans with you.

9. "The uterus is not a clown car." Although I'm this expression is usually reserved for people like Michelle Duggar, I'm certain that in due time anyone with more than two kids will be hearing it, too.

10. "Was the baby planned?" Um, excuse me? Even crazier than this question was the fact that I entertained it with a serious answer. I think I was too taken aback to think clearly.

11. "Oh, you should just have the epidural/induction/cesarean already!" Whenever you want to "birth outside the box" you're probably going to hear this, whether you've had a baby yet or not.

12. "Was it a vaginal birth?" An acquaintance told me this one, about a friend of hers who had just adopted twins and was approached by a complete stranger. Apparently it was of the utmost importance to know that little factoid. (And I think she cleverly retorted, "I don't know, it wasn't my vagina." Sarcasm FTW!)

13. "At least you have a healthy baby." Not only might this not be the case, but the details might not be so pretty, either. So if you don't want to hear about it, just shut up already.

14. "Your husband should go and get fixed." Um, last time I checked, we're not dogs - but are you offering to do the procedure?

What ridiculous comments have you heard from people? Do tell!

Pregnancy loss and grief: keep it under wraps?

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Tue, 20 Dec 2011 13:59:00 +0000

Every once in a while, the dark, sick nature of the human race hits me: lately, it's been in comments both about the Duggars announcing their latest pregnancy, and then in the sad news that they had lost their precious child. The talons come out, of course, and people basically find a nice way of saying, "They deserved it!" Barf.
Judging from some of the comments I've read, I'd say hate is the only word to describe some of them. Thinly-veiled at times, yes; but still hate, all the same. Then when I read an article about how they openly shared very touching, heartfelt photos taken after their baby had died, I saw even more hate and disdain.

"Disturbing" and "grotesque" were some of the words used. But as someone bluntly put it, "It's not like they posted pics of a bloody mess." Some comments are so utterly inappropriate - and made in all seriousness, I think - that I don't dare post them. And yet, on the TMZ site where the photo ran, this (see left) was in another set of photos on the sidebar. What kind of world do we live in where the above photo is "disturbing" and the other one is a-okay? I do not get this.

I've had two people on Facebook tell me that acquaintances actually unfriended them and stopped reading blog posts when they chose to open up about their experiences. Seriously?! I felt chills when I read this and couldn't imagine responding so coldly and callously about something like that.

A few years ago I caught up with my friend Em on Facebook and was delighted to hear from her after so many years. I was equally bummed, and felt sad and guilty, that I had no idea what she had experienced, that I wasn't there for her. I couldn't imagine the pain and grief she went through, in addition to the problems she already manages to deal with in her day-to-day struggles with bipolar disorder. Em also told me that another "friend" told her the same thing two months after her own pregnancy loss - that she was a "dweller" and criticized her for being so open about it. So when that "friend" ended up miscarrying twins, Em thought it would be a good chance to help her be more open with her feelings and emotions. Wrong.

Years ago, before I ever had kids, I was friends with a coworker who ended up giving birth prematurely to a baby that had a severe heart defect. Open heart surgery ensued, and an overbearing mother-in-law who accused her of doing something to cause this didn't help. I was appalled that this woman could be so heartless at a time when her daughter-in-law needed support, love and encouragement the most. In a crazy twist of fate, my coworker's brother and his wife lost their baby when she was six months pregnant to a heart defect as well.

Her hospital decided they weren't sure how staff would handle the birth of this stillborn baby, so they sent her an hour away to another hospital. At the time, and still, really - I can't understand why they did that. It wasn't like she had aborted her child, or done anything wrong to cause this to happen. Once they delivered the child, photos were reluctantly taken, which would appear gruesome to some, but were all she had at the time. I wasn't a mother yet, had no real idea what she was dealing with, when I saw her going about her business one day while the photo of her daughter lay on the table, out in the open. I only caught a glimpse of it, but rather than say something or react, I figured that was her way of dealing with it and just said hello and moved on. What else can you say?

I knew someone else, who, when she gave birth in the 1970s, was not even able to hold or see - or even know the sex of - her baby that was stillborn at around six months. I thought how horrible that was, to not even know, and couldn't imagine what kind of grief process she was still grappling with, several decades later. Who are they to decide how this mother grieves her child?

Several readers shared that they had been unfriended, had people stop reading their blog, even send hate mail - because they had shared their experience and grief so publicly. It's like saying, "I don't want to hear what you have to say about your hurting and loss. Get over it," and giving a big cyber middle finger to someone who is in pain and wants to grieve differently than someone else does. When you want to talk about it, they shut you out, shut you off, and effectively tell you, "You know what? I don't care, I can't care, because it makes me too uncomfortable to deal with this."

Although I've never personally miscarried, I know the words most women who have least like to hear is "It was for the best," or "it just wasn't meant to be." It may be that these people mean well and don't know what else to say, or it just comes out wrong. But at least they're saying something - instead of tuning you out and getting mad when you want to share your feelings. Saying those things could be a lot worse - like simply severing contact with someone who is reaching out. By being shut down like that, it's like you're not allowed to grieve. Like somehow in our minds, it's not really a baby unless it's full term and comes into the world screaming, pink and "healthy."

Jaime miscarried her first child two years ago, and she still finds it difficult to talk about. She says that saying nothing at all is better than "It was for the best," which she thinks kind of trivializes it and makes it sound like "no big deal." She writes, "I totally agree that most people are trying to be supportive and just aren't sure how. My best friend sat with me (over the phone cause she is 1,000 miles away) and let me vent and cry and prayed with and for me without saying 'It will be alright' or anything. That was and is, in my opinion, the best thing you can do for a person."

It certainly turns that "At least you have a healthy baby!" argument on its ear, doesn't it? As if to say, Well, it's supposed to turn out that way, but if it doesn't we don't want to hear about it. People don't seem to be able to handle it if that baby isn't healthy - then what? Well, we can't talk about that. Maybe it's a deeply-seated idea that there must have been something the mom did wrong for it to happen; or that if the pregnancy wasn't far enough along, surely she has nothing to grieve, perhaps.

I honestly wonder sometimes if our culture's in-your-face attitude about abortion is another reason people are often reluctant to talk about pregnancy loss - it puts a face to that ultrasound of a baby that is, often times, fully formed even though they are nowhere near ready to be born. It presents a confusing, dual reality for some, I think, that it definitely is more than a "ball of cells," or the suspension of disbelief that this is, was, a living little person. The idea that for some, if you don't come home with a baby in your hands that somehow, it never happened, isn't worth dwelling on because it is a life prematurely halted and therefore somehow not worthy of celebrating.

While the Duggars are in the spotlight, I think we can all learn from their experiences and trials, and I hope these wonderful photos will be a vehicle for women to open up, should they choose to, about their pregnancy loss. Many women who had suffered losses also attended the funeral - no doubt as a show of support, but perhaps also in a way to acknowledge and memorialize their own lost babies.

The Duggars' choice to memorialize their child this way is nothing new - not more than a century ago that's what people did: took pictures of dead relatives (even propped up in a casket) to remember them and celebrate their lives. What people find most grotesque about these pictures is that it puts into perspective the potential for a human life, even one so small, that I think most people would just rather not think about and pretend doesn't exist, doesn't happen.

I think there are many, many silently grieving mothers who would beg to differ.

More reading:
Duggar pictures of dead baby at memorial raise ridiculous reactions
Becoming Sarah blog - a mother writes about her home, family and healing from loss

Bi-polar and pregnant: One woman's story, part 3

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Fri, 16 Dec 2011 17:31:00 +0000

As a birth advocate, I am a moderate - I don't feel that birth is a 'one size fits all' experience; neither do I think that every epidural, every cesarean, every induction is a horrible very bad thing. We can whine and complain and write about how maternal-choice inductions and cesareans are a bad thing that put mothers and babies at risk, but in reality, sometimes they're the best option at the time - for a variety of reasons.

In talking to Em about her birth experiences, I realized that sometimes, there are those unseen reasons that no mother likes to talk about - things that really, are no one's business even though they are not visible on the outside. And your choice may tick some people off - especially those who don't know the full truth - but that's just too bad. In short, she and her experiences have taught me a lot about my birth advocacy and how I can use it to help other women.

After losing our daughter, I had my breakdown, I had my meds back, and I was armed with research. I found that my meds were a C class drug. No definitive danger to my baby and they would help me tremendously with the turmoil ahead. My psych told me flat out -NO. I had pages of research, he said NO again. He told me I had to drop this, as it was making me upset to talk about it. No, asshole you flat out patronizing me is what was aggravating me. I left. I called my insurance asking for a new psych referral. I was referred to the head doctor of the hospital’s loony bin. He couldn’t take me on but referred me to another psych that did specialize in women during their reproductive years. Hallelujah. She agreed with all my research, was pleased to have an informed patient and we decided on a direction for treatment of my bipolar disorder. Team member #2 was on board. My talk therapist has been with me since before my pregnancy with our second child.

I asked my M/F doc for a referral to a new OB. My previous one left me less than impressed, we shall say. They didn’t see me till I was being discharged after our loss and then patronized me about psych drugs during my follow up. I was seriously given the speech about post-partum depression and to call when I needed drugs. They knew I was bipolar and had a doctor to cover that area of my health. Plus after they basically called me crazy for saying something was off, I couldn’t trust them. My M/F gave me the name of my new OB. We met and I liked her immediately. She knew my history and was willing to take on a mentally ill woman with a single-minded need to have a child. Team member #3 was on board.

Shortly after we conceived again. I had this driving urge to be pregnant again and wasn’t in the mood to wait. I did wait long enough to have the autopsy confirm it was an infection, as we wanted to make sure what risks we faced in the future. I could tell you details, but really they don’t help. I felt by having a team in place I could get on with conception. So we did. From the moment I peed on the stick I knew everything was going to be ok, I knew it in my heart and soul. My pregnancy was less than ideal - I gained so much weight (55+ lbs total), I slept, and I ate like a teenager. I was moody and had emotional outbursts but refused extra meds. The less I took the safer my baby was. I was in Hell but as long as the baby was ok I could cope.

I again consented to the Nuchal fold test (I wanted to see my baby), but not the AFP. My OB agreed and didn’t push. After all I had the history of a false positive. I then had my 20-week ultrasound, which confirmed a very healthy baby boy was nestled in my womb. The tech was so cool and gave us a free 3-D scan. He slept just like his sister. I fell in love. My M/F doc came in and confirmed the healthy happy news. He had some residents and let them get a feel for the U/S on my belly - hey, it was more face time with Almond. He then tried the instruction of placing an amniotic needle and promptly got punched. He knew why and then explained that I was that patient, the 1 in 500. I can’t win the lottery but I got that one.

At my 34 wk appointment I looked at my OB and asked for a C-Section. After my previous two experiences it couldn’t be worse. I was huge and swollen and flat out miserable. She calmly looked at me and promised my next birth will go much easier and all will be ok. It is a testament to her diligence with me that I trusted her and let it go. The magic 37 weeks hit and I am 90% effaced, 3 cm dilated. We are feeling that by week 38 I will be holding my son. Week 38 hits and I am 95% effaced and 4 cm. No baby. 38 wks 4 days I headed into L&D - our son had been asleep for hours with no movement. I panicked and headed to the hospital. I get to L&D and it started - the breakdown. They were originally going to place me in the room we were informed of our daughter’s passing - nope that wasn’t happening. So into another room I go, get hooked up and bam - heartbeat blasting through to everyone but me. I began begging and crying to be induced, I was so scared my son would die in my womb. I was hearing his strong beautiful heartbeat and was crying.

It was at this point in the conversation that I asked Em, given her need for medication as her due date approached, if she was suicidal. She responded, "Yes." Unfortunately, this is one "medical reason" that many women don't wear on their sleeves, or in their swollen ankles and discomfort: one that is often met with disapproving glances and harsh comments from people who have no idea what's going on on the inside. I felt badly and thought to myself, Have I ever questioned someone's decision like this? Have I ever rushed to judgment like this before? Probably.

My OB was called and stood by her guns; she wouldn’t budge - no induction till 39 weeks. Then the Bitch Nurse, as I can call her nothing else, said to me that I should thank God my child died in my womb where I could offer her the most comfort. She continued to go on and on, saying I needed to come to peace with her death, accept God into my life, and basically listen to her. She’d been in my shoes and knew better. No, she didn’t know better. Until you are in the exact place (which let’s face it, doesn’t happen) you can’t tell someone that you know better. I began crumbling fast.

I continued to try all the tips to go into labor - membrane sweeps, spicy foods, labor cookies, sex, walking, you name it I tried it. My son was not moving; he was comfortable and stubborn. I (headed) to my psych who noticed I was in a bad place and started Prozac to help bring me out. The problem is that Prozac isn’t that safe for pregnant women. She asked how much longer I would be pregnant, to which I replied he would be born within 10 days, even if I needed an induction.

Christmas passed and so did the next week. I checked into the hospital to have my induction. They were crowded with women wanting babies before the end of the year; I wasn’t there because of that but, because I desperately needed strong psychiatric drugs that might harm my child.

Em said that once the Pitocin started and the epi was placed, she progressed quickly. She requested to sit upright - which she said surprised them - and within a few minutes her son was born.

We could see the crown of our son’s head. I decided to take a look. They brought down the mirror so I could push and watch my son enter the world. (By the) third contraction and each push brought him closer to my arms. After the third contraction and the ninth push, he was born. I couldn’t make out his face for all the tears in my eyes. I pushed for all of 10 minutes. He was immediately placed on my chest to warm and nurse. He was perfect and he was here.

My third time at the rodeo and I finally got it right. His birth cleansed me. Healed me. Made me whole again. Every moment I look at my son he heals me. His mere existence is amazing to me, as is my daughter’s. Yet when I think back on his birth is it with great joy and happiness, not the fear and apprehension I had at my daughter’s birth. I could go through the experience of birthing my son a million times over and it wouldn’t be enough for how amazing it was. My medically controlled birth, with the most interventions - and it was the best one. Not because of the medical interventions but due to the OB and her ability to do what was right for me and our son.

To see him born was a singular moment for me. Is this birth for everyone? No. Was it right for us, given the circumstances? Yes. I cannot put into words how amazing I felt after my son was born. I stood up after his birth and felt as I did at 14 weeks post partum with his sister. Everything about our son’s birth was joyous and healing.

So now you’re asking what was the point of my posts? I don’t know. Maybe it’s to shed light onto how the same woman can have vastly different experiences. Maybe it’s to tell women that even if one birth scars you, the next one could heal you. And maybe it’s just to share. Maybe it’s so that there is a positive out of all of the dark. I know most birth advocates don’t get behind inductions, but mine was needed. Not because I was physically miserable - which I was, but for the fact my mental health was slipping fast and I needed stronger drugs. I wasn’t going to risk his exposure to my meds any longer than he had to be. I feel it’s important to say this - I was perfectly poised for an induction. My cervix was ripe, I was 39 weeks 6 days, and I was on medication that could prove harmful to my child if fully exposed. I had heard enough about possible complications and c-sections during the induction prep. Mine wasn’t one of these. I have an amazing OB who listened to me in the beginning and followed through with what we decided on in the face of my bipolar rage. I learned through all this that open honest communication with your health care provider is a must. If you fear a reaction from your doctor- you need a new doctor. There is no place for silence and fear in your relationship to your health care provider.

Thanks for reading and sharing my experience. - Em.

If you or someone you know is pregnant and experiencing symptoms bipolar disorder, depression or other mental health problems, there is support and help available.

Managing Pregnancy and Bipolar Disorder - NAMI
My Bipolar Pregnancy blog
SafeFetus.com - drug database for pregnant or nursing mothers
Infant Risk center - website of pharmacologist Dr. Tom Hale at Texas Tech University Health Sciences Center

Read part one and two here.

Bi-polar and pregnant: One woman's story, part 2

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Fri, 16 Dec 2011 17:24:00 +0000

After a somewhat difficult birth and recovery with her first child, my friend Em continues her journey with her second pregnancy: which would prove more difficult than she ever imagined.

Warning: Em wanted to share her story, and both she and I felt that it might present triggers to those who have suffered through traumatic births or a pregnancy loss.

When my daughter turned two, the baby bug bit hard. So off the meds I went and started the baby making. I knew my Psych’s position and figured it worked so well the last time, we could do it again. I was wrong, so very wrong....

For some strange reason, I felt I was never going to hold this child; I was in constant fear of the other shoe dropping. I chose a new OB, one referred to me by many moms in my mommy group. I proceeded to have one complication after another with my bipolar this time. I was severely symptomatic. I was borderline bonkers for lack of a better term. I screamed, I cried, I raged. I was unable to gain any weight, I was constantly sick with a cold or flu. We did the AFP (which I did with my daughter) and Nuchal fold test - this was new to me and I was super excited to get to see my baby so early. We were going about our business, trying to be positive in the midst of my hurdles. My spouse and I focused on the miracle in the womb. I could handle anything as long as my child was safe.

Then I got the dreaded phone call - my AFP results were positive for Down’s. Or I should say that my chances were 1:45. I lost it, not that I had it to begin with. The shoe had dropped. I was heavily guided and suggested to have an Amnio. I agreed feeling it would be important to have a team ready to care for my baby when he or she was born. I can tell you today I was strong-armed by that genetics counselor that day. I was told the risks were minimal; I was told 1:500 experience a complication. I thought, ‘oh that one won’t be me, it will be ok. They know better than me’.

We went into a holding pattern after that. I was trying desperately to remain calm and centered; after all I had a 2 year old....Our first appointment was with a genetics counselor, went over our decision, and signed the consent waiver. I was told we could back out after the U/S if everything was good and we felt that was enough. Then we get to the ultrasound. This is always one of my favorite things - I get to see my baby. They did an in-depth level 2 test, checked all vital organs and systems, perfection. We were told to expect a baby girl. I was excited about having two girls - sisters. Yet I was dreading the teen years already, who wouldn’t with two girls? The doctor confirmed we wanted to do the amnio, and we nodded. So began the prep work. He joked about my navel ring and how the pain from the amnio would be less than the piercing. One stick and I had a contraction so we had to do a second sac puncture - I was in pain by that point. The test ran smoothly after that. Went home and rested, napped, checked Facebook - you know, the usual time wasters. I had zero pain, was relaxed and thought we’d get great news on our perfect daughter.

By midnight I had fever and chills, shakes and tremors. I managed to fall asleep thinking I was just cold. I felt as if I was freezing. I woke up alone in the morning feeling off. I couldn’t place it but I felt wrong. I called my OB and begged to be seen, so they squeezed me in. They had the hardest time finding a heartbeat, but swore they heard her moving so all was well. Checked my injection site and stated there was no infection. I had the flu and to go home and drink water, sleep....By 3 in the afternoon I started having pains. I waited, but called in about 4:15 when I realized they were rhythmic and regular - 12 minutes apart. They said I wasn’t resting enough. I got pissed and called the clinic where they did the amnio. Got my maternal fetal (referred to as the M/F doc) doc on the line and he was highly concerned. He told me 600 mg ibuprofen and sleep. So I slept. When I woke 45 minutes later, pains were worse. Then the blood. A tiny amount but I lost it. Called the M/F doc on his personal cell, which he freely gave to me, and he sent me into L&D....got settled, in the gown and the residents start(ed) listening for a heartbeat - with headphones. The second resident arrive(d) to do more of the same. Then they bring in the U/S machine.

This is that moment, the moment when your life shatters. He looked at me and said, “I am sorry but there is no heartbeat.” I went into shock and asked what that meant. We all know what that meant but I had to ask. We had lost our daughter.

At this point in editing Em's post, I stopped. I had never experienced these things before, and wasn't sure if the graphic nature of her post would help others or hurt more. I am so in awe of her openness to share this experience - after all, just this last week marked the anniversary of her daughter's death. What should I print? How should I say it? I felt like, even with Em's permission, that I was pushing the edge of an invisible envelope somehow.

I wanted to leave my body. I didn’t want the memories ahead of me, I didn’t want the pain I was feeling inside my womb and in my heart. I was 75% effaced and 2 cm. Contractions were 6 minutes apart. I was told there were 2 options. Option 1) was to deliver my baby. Option 2) a D&E - this is one step up from a D&C and would require full anesthesia.

I desperately wanted option 2, I wanted the pain gone. Then we asked the most important question of all - why? To get that answer I would have to deliver my daughter vaginally.

Em wrote, in detail, the images from her birth: an unmedicated delivery of a baby that was 18 weeks. Perfect. In every way. She felt the urge to push before the epidural was administered, and, as Em put it, "There she was." It was at this point the physician realized - her baby had died from an infection via the amnio. His response: "Shit."

He knew immediately the why. She had died from an infection, introduced via the amniotic needle. I have no memories past this point, I blacked out. I know they put pain meds in the epi so the M/F doc could retrieve the placenta. Yet I have no memory till I woke an hour and a half later.

That night is the single worst of my life. I woke off and on, crying, screaming. Finally about 6 am I got the courage to hold my little Angel. Tiny and perfect, she was wrapped in the smallest blanket I have ever seen, in a tiny bonnet and dress. Oh how I cried. I kissed her and begged forgiveness for not protecting her....This was my natural childbirth. This experience taught me many things. I learned I am stronger than I ever knew I could be. I learned that questioning everything was the only way to make an informed choice and if I didn’t like the answer to keep digging until I found one I could be at peace with. I also learned my body, my choice, and my decision.

Continued here.
Read part one here.

Bi-polar and pregnant: One woman's story, part 1

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Fri, 16 Dec 2011 17:20:00 +0000

It's amazing how different each pregnancy - and each birth - a woman has can be completely different from each other. No more is that more apparent than with my friend Em, who has had three pregnancies and two live births. "My path is like many others, yet vastly different from most," she writes. "These posts are not a defense of my choices. They are my choices made with the most knowledge I had at the time. I can wish for different outcomes, but each experience shaped me in a way I needed to be shaped. Nothing is without pain and my path to today is no exception."

Warning: Em wanted to share her story, and both she and I felt that it might present triggers to those who have suffered through traumatic births or a pregnancy loss.

I have been very lucky - I have given birth to all three of my children vaginally. I have had two spontaneous labors and one induction. I have had three vastly different birth experiences. My first was scary and painful, this one I call the bad. The second was the ugly, more on that later. The third was cathartic and cleansing and amazing. I ended my child bearing days on a high note. In fact I could relive my son’s birth a million times over.

Let’s start with the major hurdle ahead of us - I am bipolar. This is important to know as it plays a massive part in the pregnancies ahead. I was 30 when diagnosed and felt reborn to have a name to the weird things in my head. I have a team when I get pregnant - my OB, my psychiatrist, and a talk therapist. Bipolar plays a role in everything I do, whether it is by conscious thought or my sub-conscious. My case is quite severe. I could write endlessly about how messed up I am but alas this blog is about birth, not mental health. So on with the show.

"The Bad"
We decided the time to start a family was right so I consulted my psych and was told no drugs. OK. I was scared and knew how sick I became off the meds, but I wanted a baby so no drugs. I am beyond lucky when it comes to conceiving my children, simple temping got me pregnant. We conceived our daughter easily and I started reading books. I wanted to know what was ahead, both pregnancy and delivery wise. I dutifully read my books, feeling they made me knowledgeable. Never once did any one refer me to Ina May Gaskin. I promptly tossed “What to Expect” (LOL!) and focused instead on the Mayo Clinic book and the Week by Week book. Given my health history I had been taught to count and trust my doctors. They were the one with the medical degree not me, right?

I had a fairly easy, uneventful pregnancy.... I met all the doc’s in the practice so I wouldn’t have a stranger between my legs. I hired a Doula to get me through labor without pain meds, I had my birth plan. I was armed with knowledge. I have neck issues and was required to have an epi placed during labor or in early labor since I can’t get a breathing tube down without me being awake to swallow it, so I asked for the unheard of saline block. Sounds like I was heading for an amazing birth experience right? Yeah no.

Em's first was a typical vaginal birth - 38-week membrane sweep that turned into what sounds - or reads - like a baby vs. doctor tug of war, in a way.

I am not one to follow all the rules and neither is my daughter. She got tired of all the poking and prodding and started labor. That was 2:50 p.m. By 3:30 I am writhing and screaming in pain, my daughter does nothing half-way - I was contracting every two minutes for 80 seconds. The nurse immediately says time for Nubain. Pain did not go away; I just stopped caring about it. From there the glorious epi was placed, with drugs. I had lost all my will and had zero support to go all natural. My husband panics when I am in labor. He will stand there or stay in the room watching but he can’t get out of his own head to help me. I continued to progress steadily without the pit. Or if there was pit I was uninformed.

.... I was told to start pushing, because being a 10 means you’re ready, right? So I pushed, and pushed, and pushed some more. I pushed for an hour before I felt the urge to push. So like a good obedient patient I listened and kept pushing till I felt pain, burning tearing pain. It felt like there was a Ring of Fire, as a friend of mine calls it. I was told to hold it and stop pushing when the pain was at its worst; I politely said “F*** that” and pushed my daughter into the world. They whisked her away to clean, weigh and Apgar her. The OB proceeded to start the stitching process which took approximately 25 minutes. I have no clue how many stitches were placed but if she averaged a stitch a minute - 25 stitches sounds close enough. They we’re all internal, only three external. I looked - it hurt and I wanted to know why. They wouldn’t let me hold my daughter until I was done being stitched. They offered a bottle and I said no. My breasts were ready for her. I immediately placed her on my breast, and there she got her first meal. She was perfect and beautiful. She was then whisked away to the nursery for her exam.

All was great until they stood me up to use the bathroom for the first time, and I can tell you I have never felt pain like that. I literally thought my uterus was going to hit the floor, I couldn’t move. Well, obviously that didn’t happen, but the pain was beyond my imagination. I sat on a plastic doughnut for three weeks till I popped that poor balloon. At my six-week post partum check I was cleared and “healthy." I was cleared to begin relations with my spouse and like a moron tried. I ended up in tears it hurt so badly. I still was in loads of pain and proceeded to find a new OB, whose nurse diagnosed a RAGING bacterial infection that took four rounds of antibiotics and seven weeks to heal. I swore a C-section couldn’t have been worse at that point - 14 weeks healing time total.

From what I have heard this is the typical experience. Yeah well, it isn’t a positive one, it sucked. I mean seeing and holding my daughter was amazing. The healing from this was awful and left me scarred for the days ahead. To say my post partum period was one of pain is an understatement. I thought there is no way I am doing this again. That thought lasted two years.

Continued here.

Merry Christmas to You! Blog giveaway

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Wed, 14 Dec 2011 20:06:00 +0000

Sooooo.... who wants an Amazon Kindle? :)

Here's what it looks like, from Amazon's website.
Not sure if it's a 3G because I'm a big dummy about
those things.

Here's the story: my mom gave me this thing for my birthday last month. Originally my grandma (who is a ripe 86 years old and wouldn't know which end was up on this thing, I'm sure) won it in a contest, and since neither of them could use it, she gave it to me. Well, I don't think I can either!

I know how much people love them. I personally would rather have the real thing in my hand, able to write notes in the margins, etc. and stuff. Plus, I already spend wayyyyy too much time on the computer, which is not helped by having a brand new laptop for Christmas. (Thank you, Mr. DH) And considering all our books have been packed in storage until we get a fancy dancy new built-in bookshelf built (ahem) I haven't really read much, much less picked up a book, in a while.

So, I decided to give it away! Whoopee!

Disclaimer: Here is a link to Amazon's page to see the product. It's just like this one, only the box has been opened. (so consider it a re-gift, of sorts) It's never been used, never plugged in, nothing downloaded to it or any of that. I opened the box, took one look at it and thought, WTH am I going to do with this?! So there. The rest is up to you.

All you have to do to enter is comment: say hello, tell me how supremely awesome I am, how much you love childbirth education or birth advocacy - whatever. Just keep in (reasonably) clean and in the Christmas spirit.

The contest will run from now (the date of this post, obviously) until 8 p.m. Friday, at which point comments will be closed. Make sure to turn on the message feature on your Google/Blogger profile so I can contact you if you win. If I can't find a way to contact you without giving the entire world your full name, then you just might be screwed out of a chance to win, which wouldn't be cool. So make sure I can get a hold of you. I've had people win in contests before only to turn off their message feature on Facebook, which totally stinks.

(Because Facebook is totally anal about contests, I'm doing it strictly through the blog. If they come after me for posting the link to the blog, well, who knows what'll happen. We'll cross that bridge when we come to it.)

I will pay shipping (sorry, contiguous US people only), shipping confirmation to track the package, and insurance (up to $139 value! Woot!) just in case something disastrous happens, like it falls off the back of Santa's sleigh. I'll have my five-year-old pick the winner (she doesn't know how to read yet, so we're safe!).

Good luck!

PS. Email me if you have any questions, or if I'm forgetting something, which sometimes happens. Merry Christmas!

PSS. Do not forget to allow me to contact you through your Google/Blogger profile, or leave your email address in the comments. Thanks!

Doctors perform cesarean - on woman who wasn't even pregnant

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Mon, 12 Dec 2011 02:17:00 +0000

This article made the rounds again on Facebook and reminded me that I still wanted to write a blog post about it. It's been a year, and Jill over at The Unnecesarean did one then too, but it obviously bears repeating: and a resounding "WTF?!"

How does a woman who only looks - but isn't really - pregnant just 'walk in' to a labor and delivery ward and attempt to have a baby without:
1) complete medical records from her pregnancy care provider
2) a vaginal exam to check for dilatation of the cervix
3) fetal heart tone monitoring after a two-day induction?
4) and once you check the cervix and don't detect a fetal head, no ultrasound to determine baby's position or
5) if there really even is a baby there to begin with??

What?!

Even people who've never given birth before can likely guess that there is something seriously messed up here. (Actually, for those who want a completely natural hospital birth, to be left alone for two days to labor might be a dream come true...)

She apparently showed up in their hospital "asking for a c-section" and they made the pregnancy diagnosis. Later, however, the resident was found to "not have enough experience to make the pregnancy diagnosis and doctors should have conducted their own exam." No kidding.

Most of us could and do easily make a "pregnancy diagnosis" - it's called buying a $6 pregnancy test and peeing on a stick. And if that doesn't do the trick, I bet any one of us could easily pick up that ultrasound transducer, slather our stomachs in gel and somehow figure out how to get a rudimentary image to pop up on the screen. So what happened here?

Of course, the group of residents and physicians in question received no other disciplinary action other than a stern warning and a "letter of concern" (said with booming authoritative announcer voice) and that was about it. Which says a lot about the state of obstetrics and maternity care in this country these days.

As one commenter - who happens to be a homebirth midwife - said:

And all they get is a "letter of concern"??? As a homebirth midwife, I would get my license yanked for far less. Just goes to show the double standard.

Preach it, sister!

It is a double standard. And the comments - as well as the almost lackadaisical approach the medical staff takes - is troubling to maternity patients who are otherwise said to be "demanding," "seeking attention," blah blah blah - as if it's all their fault. If this woman had a rare medical condition (a false pregnancy, or "hysterical pregnancy," as the article says) that fools her body into thinking she's pregnant when she's really not - who can blame her? Hell, sometimes I get weird flutters and sensations (that are no doubt gas bubbles) that would convince me, if I didn't know any better, that I was pregnant. The idea of calling it a "hysterical pregnancy" immediately conjures up women who are desperate, mentally ill and out of control, running around in circles around the unit with their arms waving madly, "I just need to have a cesarean! Agggghhhh!"

And not only does this take a turn that suggests this woman is clearly at fault and to blame, but if she is mentally ill, there is that stigma as well: and therefore reason to issue a complete lack of sympathy for her. As if to say, Oh, first she thinks she's pregnant - now she's crazy! *snort* Crazy hormonal women!

Per Wikipedia:

"Research shows that 18% of women with pseudocyesis were at one time diagnosed as pregnant by medical professionals.

The hallmark sign of pseudocyesis that is common to all cases is that the affected patient is convinced that she is pregnant. Abdominal distension is the most common physical symptom of pseudocyesis (60–90%). The abdomen expands in the same manner as it does during pregnancy, so that the affected woman looks pregnant. These symptoms often resolve under general anesthesia and the woman's abdomen returns to its normal size.

The second most common physical sign of pseudocyesis is menstrual irregularity (50–90%). Women are also reported to experience the sensation of fetal movements known as quickening, even though there is no fetus present (50–75%). Other common signs and symptoms include gastrointestinal symptoms, breast changes or secretions, labor pains, uterine enlargement, and softening of the cervix. One percent of women eventually experience false labor."

Apparently some women even have a positive pregnancy test.

This article mainly focuses on the psychological aspects of it - women who have tried unsuccessfully for years to become pregnant; those who have suffered pregnancy loss; etc. The actual medical problems, like pituitary problems, are kind of glossed over - probably because when it comes to certain hormone-related illnesses, they are clueless. Chalk one up for the crazy lady again!

It's amazing the number of comments passing this off as no big deal, blaming the woman for attention or just kind of blow it off and hope no one notices.

Dena Konkel, assistant director of public affairs for the medical board, said the case was "unique." "The board was mostly concerned about the management of patient care," she said. "It may have fallen below the standard of care."

"Some would argue that this is not disciplinary in nature -- it doesn't limit their ability to practice medicine," said Konkel. But, "it creates a public record, something that can be looked up and read about what happened."

Yeah, that public record that future patients can look at that basically points in all directions to these clowns. And the sad part is that people will still trust them, still keep going to them, as if nothing happened. They'll likely read this story and think, "That woman was mentally ill - it's not really the doctor's fault." "Unique" isn't exactly the word I'd use to describe this situation; I think completely effed up is way more suitable. Using a word casually like that to categorize this event is completely ignoring the fact that yes, it "may" have fallen below the standard of care - by completely ignoring or bypassing all protocols in place to protect both the mother and the baby. Are they really that hands-off that they did no vaginal exams on this patient? I doubt it.

I wonder if perhaps this person just came in, perhaps in pain, and the resident took one look at her and didn't know what to do with her. I've had only one resident in my pregnancy care, while in the hospital, and I could read him like a book: he was young, uncomfortable, and wanted to parrot exactly what he was told to say and do from his superiors. When I presented him with my opinion, firm and respectfully, he backed down immediately, like he had the spine of a jelly fish. I wondered if he'd ever encountered an informed patient before that just didn't take his word for it?

The article indicated that the resident who dealt with the patient was trained in ultrasound. So why the heck didn't they do one? To at least check for the position of the baby's head, since it didn't sound like they had any prior medical records for her? No explanation was offered. Of course.

Something to consider, however, is that in some parts of the state - including those counties surrounding the area where this "birth" took place - there are as many as 5.5 percent of women seeking little if any prenatal care at all. This could explain why there were no medical records (we can assume) or why the seemingly blasé attitude towards the lack of records. Unfortunately this may not be all that uncommon in hospitals where certain factors (like lack of education, poverty and lack of health insurance) mean a woman has not sought proper care in pregnancy.

While this case happened in late 2008, it took the state medical board a year to investigate, and the public first heard about it two years after it happened. One physician still works in the facility, but doesn't deliver babies anymore; another has since left the hospital. It makes you wonder just what went on behind the scenes: was there more than a slap on the wrist? Why didn't the patient sue? Did her mental status have something to do with it? Her economic situation? Why haven't we heard anything from her - or at the very least, seen her on an episode of Jerry Springer? Her neighbors, her friends - surely someone would have seen that she looked visibly pregnant and now, has no baby to show for it. I hope it wasn't a case of her just being too embarrassed to say anything, perhaps for fear of even more stigma should it come to light as a psychological condition that makes her look "crazy." And consider the tone of these doctors - who don't want to come right out and take the blame - it almost makes it sound like they're blaming her and her "mental condition" for all of it.

A certain percentage of false pregnancies are due to mental conditions; but not all can be attributed to that. Some believe that a truly false pregnancy (as opposed to a simulated pregnancy, where the woman fakes it) originates from the pituitary and hormonal imbalances. This is, after all, where breast milk production generates as well, and why some women who were not even pregnant can breastfeed a child. In fact, I remember distinctly a client at the mental health facility where I worked who was lactating - and had never been pregnant. She was concerned, because she knew she wasn't pregnant - didn't want to be pregnant - hadn't even had sex recently. I'm sure the already-existing mental health problems she was already experiencing only added to the "it's all in your head!" ideology.

False pregnancies are apparently fairly common in animals - who knew? But they don't do it to seek attention or as the result of a mental condition. According to Wikipedia, "symptoms of pseudocyesis are similar to the symptoms of true pregnancy and are often hard to distinguish from it." We can give the doctors a pass for not knowing, but not the patient? Especially when a simple ultrasound could have avoided two days worth of expensive induction procedures and a completely unnecessary scar on this woman's uterus.

More reading:
Doctors perform c-section on non-pregnant woman
False pregnancy

A (surprise!) breech birth story

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 00:19:00 +0000

A few months ago, I posted a breech birth link on FaceBook for my non-birthy friends and was very surprised at the answers: many of them were born breech, knew someone who was, and one even had twin siblings both delivered breech. Many made jokes about their choice of presentation coming into the world, but by and large, they all considered it a totally normal, if not slightly old-school way to be born, and something to be proud of. Some seemed completely surprised that nowadays, cesarean section is usually the general rule of thumb (at least in the United States).

So when I saw that one of my readers had a breech vaginal birth, I got excited! Having two breech-presenting babies myself, I wanted to hear how it went and have been dying to post her story. Farrah has her own blog here, but has graciously offered to let me borrow her story so you'll see it here, too!

One of the topics I have hoped to touch on in my blog is natural childbirth. Most people are amazed at the birth story of my youngest child who is now 14 months old.

People thought that Joe and I were crazy when we conceived our third child when our daughter was just a few months old. Maybe we were. I don't know, but I do know it felt right (and still does). From the beginning, we had tossed around the idea of a home birth, but I went back and forth about it my entire pregnancy.

Fast forward to my 39th and most miserable week of pregnancy. I went to visit my midwife, to find out that my baby was breech. Of course, the medical standard is that breech equals an automatic c-section. I wasn't just going to give in and accept that. I told her that I was still a few days away from my due date and I felt that I could give him a chance to turn. She offered some suggestions such as inversion. I decided to visit a chiropractor who specialized in the Webster Technique, which is known to help breech babies flip. I also used techniques from Spinning Babies.

After some belly mapping and a medical opinion, we were convinced that the baby was now head down. I decided against any sort of medical induction and decided that I would go into labor on my own at home. My labor started at approximately 8pm and my water broke by the early morning. Now I was induced twice in the past (once for true medical reasons and the other was an elective induction), so maybe that is the reason I'm used to my babies coming out within 15 minutes of my water breaking. That didn't happen this time. I can't say that I was intending on staying home through the whole thing, but I froze up in the midst of active labor from lovely vomiting and pain that I just couldn't communicate that it was time to go to the hospital.

I remember wanting to push and there was vernix and meconium coming out. It dawned on me that the baby had flipped BACK to breech. And I thought what a stubborn child this would be (and he is). We called the paramedics and I needed to push in the ambulance, but they kept wanting me to hold him in. To this day, I still find that ridiculous. It did cause problems because he needed to come out and needed oxygen after he was born.

My breech baby was 8lb 15oz and was 21.5 inches long. It was just about as painful as a pitocin induced birth (I've never had a epidural). But it is an experience that made me stronger. I do hope to see more childbirth professionals educate themselves on the "hands off" breech technique and realize that breech babies CAN be born vaginally. I don't know if the United States is starting to change (I doubt it), but I know that in Canada, they have said that mothers should be allowed to try to birth a breech baby vaginally instead of automatically doing a c-section.

Farrah did say the birth was pretty painful; she could feel contractions going all the way down her legs and was "seeing stars." I am in awe of her intuition to head to the hospital when she felt the pushing phase was taking too long, and realized that yes, her baby was breech! She said that on the way to the hospital, medical staff was alerted to her baby's position and quickly "read up" on how to deliver a breechling. She said, though, that "within 20 minutes of arriving at the hospital, I was pushing him out." Wow!

Despite needing oxygen shortly after his birth, she says that her little boy nursed like a champ and was very healthy. "He's an amazing, content, breastfed, and intact baby boy. I love him very much and his birth was a very healing experience for me."

More reading:
Keep Your Hands Off The Breech, by Mary Cronk, MBE
No more automatic c-section for breech births, says OB/GYN Society

I am the most annoying mom EVER!

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Thu, 01 Dec 2011 21:26:00 +0000

Mama Birth's infamous post "4 Kids, 1 Mom and a Grocery Store - What could go wrong?" got me thinking - and chuckling - about how once you hit the more than two kid threshold, suddenly things like grocery shopping take on new meaning. Whenever I announce to my husband that I'm taking all three kids to the store, he usually looks at me like I've just spoken Chinese and says, "You're doing what?!"

Yeah, I know, I answer. But I don't have a choice because you'll be at X, Y or Z, I say and smile, crossing my eyes like, "Yeah, I'm crazy!"

I can remember times, though (even still), when just having one with me was the pits. Like the time we were in my hoity toity town's supermarket and my kid tried to hurl a soup can at a passerby. Yeah, that went over well. I smiled and moved on. At that point, what else can you do? He didn't mean any harm by it, honest...

One thing I dread while shopping are diaper changes. I've had a few changing table incidents that make me never want to travel with a diapered child until potty training is complete. At Wegman's, I now know that the changing table in one of their locations comes up to about my neck, which means I have to stand on a chair if I actually want to reach my child. I also know that my two-year-old is deathly afraid of changing tables, which doesn't help, especially as he's trying to roll away while strapped in, screaming the entire time and peeing on himself. While lying on his stomach. Try keeping that from flooding everything.

Caution: Messy, loud,
boogery kids behaving NORMALLY.

Usually when I have to take my kids shopping, the youngest is being a doll, charming the pants off everyone, while the older two are up each other's butts and annoying the heck out of me. Oldest will hiss to middle child, "Stop touching that!" and/or insist that whatever she does has to be done his way now or else. They insist on playing hide and seek among the fabric bolts at Jo Ann's, flying out of the end of aisles just as someone innocently strolls by with their shopping cart. A nervous, startled look gets cast my way as I'm sure that person is thinking, "I wish that woman would discipline her children!" I'm sure the lady whose child got a soup can flung at him thought that...

That couldn't be further from the truth, though. I try to teach my kids how to be considerate of other people, to think of their personal space when we're out and about. My husband and I work hard to teach them manners, how to respect other people and not be swing from the rafters at every store we enter. Funny thing, though, I think a lot of other people teach their children the same things, because I don't see a lot of other kids acting like hell on wheels all the time when we're out, contrary to what some say.

While my kids are usually crazy personified when we're all together, individually they're sweet as pie and wonderful. Just the other day, we split up - hubby took the boys to get haircuts, I took middle daughter for groceries and the dollar store. We kept running into the same smiling older man throughout the store, who I could tell got a kick out of seeing my daughter 'helping' and being so angelic. I laughed inwardly and thought, You really think she's like this all the time? hahahahaha as we stood staring at the lobster tank together. Oh, how I wish!

Yesterday I took youngest tot into the store for toilet paper, and while he is usually heavily confined in a shopping cart, this time he held my hand. I've done little tests like this with him to see how he does, often admiring those other moms who have the guts to let their little ones trail along behind them while shopping with the reasonable expectation that they'll stay there and not go anywhere. Yesterday Tater Tot passed with flying colors, but if the other two were there? He'd probably be straddling the top shelf of the candy aisle, or ready to head for the parking lot with some other family. This is why I so often used an umbrella stroller rather than a sling or carrier when I had all three - because sprinting while slinging a baby is just not all that comfortable. Sorry.

I've read numerous articles that restaurants are banning children. Some are charging extra for babies that can't even eat solid foods yet and are exclusively breastfed. Their strollers take up room, they say, and charge them a fee. Great. What if that were a wheelchair? What if it were an obese person who is larger than an average adult? Do we charge them extra because they "take up space?" How cruel.

I've read tirades from writers that can't stand how your brats act on airplanes, and equally inane comments from readers who agree with policies that babies and their parents should be relegated to the backs of airplanes. One dad did say that when you adopt the herd mentality with crying infants, it helps you to feel like you're not the only one. Perhaps, but it makes me think that people who otherwise can't stand kids are ganging up on parents who are just trying to make the best of a difficult situation. They act like they think we were all born as 30-year-olds, and honestly, when I look around, I wonder - where are these kids? I don't see them, crawling all over the place and behaving badly. We can't always assume that the public tirades we do see from kids are a result of bad parenting or lack of discipline. We all have our bad days - even adults (who I regularly see flipping others off, cutting in line, swearing in public, etc...)

For the most part, when we're out in public people are usually sympathetic. Several older ladies often smile and nod, one toddling up to me to take me aside and tell me about her six kids. I enjoy hearing from these people because it gives me some perspective: I don't know how they did it in the days before strollers and other conveniences that often make our lives a little easier (and make us look a little more like a sherpa).

Because I care that my kids might theoretically be bothering someone, I'm often reciting endlessly, "Watch out for other people" when my son wants to try his hand at steering the cart. Usually this goes badly and we skid into the glass doors of the frozen foods case. I'm waiting for the day when he accidentally mows over another human being and I have to explain my case. In typical two-year-old fashion, my youngest often chooses one song to sing over and over at top volume for the entire duration of our trip, which might elicit chuckles, smiles, raised eyebrows or a compliment or two. One woman rounded the corner and came over to us, and I thought, Oh no. Here it comes. She pleasantly surprised me by saying cheerfully, "We were standing all the way over there (points to some unseen, faraway location) and I just had to find out where the singing was coming from!" Well then. You've found it!

It's often occurred to me that really, the only person my kids are bothering is me. All my hissing, correcting, scolding and mothering probably sounds like a broken record, I often think, and I wonder, "Am I the annoying one here?" Sometimes when I'm about to scold my oldest for something, I literally have to tell myself, "Stop it. He's not really doing anything wrong. Stop crawling up his butt about every little thing." I don't want my children to behave like little heathens, but really, I know I discipline my kids the best way I can; I can't help it if people judge me based on one encounter when they don't see the big picture.

This was confirmed to me one day when I asked my energetic duo, "Why are you two being so loud?" thinking of other people around us who might be annoyed.

"Because they're children," a perfect stranger said to me as he turned around and looked at us.

Point taken.

Crash

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Mon, 28 Nov 2011 18:01:00 +0000

That is, after about six weeks on Armour Thyroid, the best way to describe how I feel right now.

I have noticed a gradual resurgence of old symptoms - like shortness of breath, brain fog and now a wicked case of joint pain. I thought it was those new pillows I bought like two or three weeks ago, and now realize - it's probably because my meds started crapping out after not being increased properly and my symptoms were coming back worse than ever.

This is the point where patients often hear one of several things: "The meds aren't working, my doctor wants me to go back on Synthroid," or "See? It doesn't work - it can't be regulated so you need to stop using it." Sometimes the patient will exhibit hyperthyroid symptoms - I've heard people say, "My so-and-so was on that stuff and all her hair fell out and she almost had a heart attack and died. It's terrible." What that means is that the doctor put that person on too much Armour - because it's considered old-fashioned and bloodwork is king, many doctors - including mine, it looks like - don't often dose patients properly.

Do I blame the medication? No, not really. It's a combination of things - the dose, the amount of time spent on that dose without increasing, and other things. My vitamin D levels are low again, and my wonderful gastroenterologist has me on 2,000 units per day now (instead of the mega crazy 50 thousand a week like before). I started noticing symptoms before the Vitamin D was added, so I don't think it's a toxicity issue, since I'd probably have to take nearly the entire bottle in one sitting to achieve those levels.

As I thought about how my symptoms have manifested themselves - gradual tiredness at times that I usually had a lot of energy, brain fog, joint pain and decreasing motivation - I pictured myself digging a hole with the 1/2 grain (or 30 mg) dose I was on. That's quite low to start with, and it's customary to increase by 1/2 every two weeks or so, something my doctor didn't do. In fact, while he wanted blood levels taken again at the end of the month (which I just got done on Friday), he doesn't want to see me again until January. Sorry, but that isn't going to happen.

How I felt, I realized, was like treading water and then sinking into a hole. Once you increase your dose - I have actually been taking two pills a day now instead of one, just to see what happens - it's like trying to claw your way to the top of the hole to get out. When I read the Stop the Thyroid Madness! website, advocate and patient Janie Bowthorpe basically said the same thing:

The key to understanding this mistake is with the word “starting dose”. When first starting on any natural desiccated thyroid product, it can be wise to start on one grain or less, which is lower than you will ultimately need. Why? To help your body adjust to the direct T3. BUT, patients have found it UNWISE to stay on that low dose much longer than 2 weeks without raising. Why? Because hypothyroid symptoms can return with a VENGEANCE due to the feedback loop between the hypothalamus, pituitary and thyroid gland, i.e your hypothalamus gland senses the addition of desiccated thyroid (thinking the thyroid sent it), then sends a message to the pituitary gland, which in turn sends a message to the thyroid gland to stop producing, making you even more hypothyroid than you began.

Basically, I'm feeling exactly the way she described.

Interestingly enough, the hypothalamus regulates body temperature, and many people with hypothyroidism have consistently low body temperatures. I have had low body temps for years; in fact, last night I woke up with that stiff neck issue, took an Advil and suddenly felt ill - I took my temperature and it said 96. something or other. I took it this morning and it was 95.6, just a few minutes ago and it was 98.2. Holy crap.

Some doctors will scoff at the idea of considering low body temps as a marker for hypothyroidism, and then go back to the TSH values with religious fervency. I don't even know how I can adequately assess whether I'm ill half the time or not because my temps never reflect a typical 'fever' reading, so I generally just go by how I feel physically. Who knows.

In the meantime, I will ask for my blood test results after a month on the T3/T4 combination meds. I'm not sure if I should go back down to taking 1 1/2 pills, because splitting it myself doesn't sit well with me as it's not a surefire way to regulate the dose I'm getting. I definitely will call the doctor with my concerns and have him write a new prescription, this time only asking for a limited number of pills so that we can increase in increments of one-half every two weeks or so.

More reading:
Hypothalamus-pituitary-thyroid gland feedback loop - Wikipedia

Milwaukee co-sleeping ads: a fear-mongering lack of information

noreply@blogger.com (The Deranged Housewife) — Wed, 16 Nov 2011 00:32:00 +0000

I'm sure I'm like the zillionth blogger to talk about this, and for good reason: those stupid Milwaukee Department of Health ads are over the top. They're making national headlines now as the AP has picked up the story and the public's reaction to it. And as usual, they also come with a million comments from idiots who think that people who do this should have children removed from their custody, blah blah blah.

As I searched for photos online about the project, I found a few of them - besides the butcher ones that ran recently. This campaign, from what I can tell, is not "new" - another blog posted various photos from it as early as last year. It seems like only now is it really drawing any widespread criticism.

I don't even co-sleep, and can probably count the number of times I have on one hand. And I still find them absolutely ridiculous. I should add that, for my second and third children, they slept in a bassinette/Pack 'n Play thingy in our room for at least a full six months before we moved them into their own beds.

What a nice touch. But where are your
sources?

You see similar ads that encourage - coerce, guilt - you into vaccinating, for everything under the sun. The bottom line of these campaigns is not only that you should vaccinate for every illness that comes down the pike, but that a government entity knows more about raising your children than you do. Granted, some people do need help in that department, sadly, but the majority of people who co-sleep responsibly have probably got that figured out by now.

The ad campaigns are disturbing on many levels - of course, no parent would let their child play with a knife. However, how many news articles do you read about toddlers finding a loaded weapon in the home, accidentally discharging it and causing fatal injuries? According to this article, as of 2009 there was at least "one gun crime per household in West Milwaukee." How many of those households had young children living in them? It seems that co-sleeping is the least of their worries.

Another very disturbing fact about these ads is that they lack just that: facts. Where is the information that says co-sleeping can be safe? Where is the data that suggests certain people should not co-sleep with their child, or the suggestions on how to do it more safely? You won't find them here. That you'd have to get from the Big Bad Internet or your pediatrician (good luck with that).

It seems the only pediatrician who will give you good advice is Dr. Sears, who, with a family of eight children, is already bucking the traditional system when it comes to the politics of parenting. His recommendations are on his website. He says,

Worldwide research shows that the SIDS rate is lowest (and even unheard of) in countries where co-sleeping is the norm.

On countries where there just is no Babies 'R Us and cribs are probably an anomaly, what do they do? They share the family bed, of course. Does the United States think they are the only nation of people who has ever co-slept with their child?

Seriously?

I question these statistics, and so do other studies.
They call it "crib death" for a reason, don't they?

Dr. Sears goes on to note:

The Consumer Product Safety Commission published data that described infant fatalities in adult beds. These same data, however, showed more than 3 times as many crib related infant fatalities compared to adult bed accidents.

He does say, however, there is an exception: if mom is a smoker or abuses alcohol. Both of which are reasons not to co-sleep. This blogger also pointed out that

most babies in Milwaukee die because they were born too early, or because they have birth defects. Only 19% of the infant deaths are the result of SIDS or accidental suffocation, according to a 2010 report. And only a fraction of those deaths occurred in infants that were sharing a bed.

The city's report on infant mortality - which is around 11.1 deaths per 1,000 births - says that "Of these deaths, the majority died in an unsafe sleep environment." They do not say, however, what percentage of those environments contained risk factors for SIDS.

Ways to lower your risk include breastfeeding - something many serious co-sleeping parents do in order to better facilitate nursing at night. Since these mothers are already breastfeeding, it is unlikely they would willingly ingest drugs or alcohol that would compromise their sleep patterns, because of the fact that it would come out in their breastmilk. Similarly, they are probably less likely to be smokers, because it is obviously unhealthy around an infant, but can diminish milk supply.

(This interesting study also suggests that mothers who do smoke and breastfeed are more likely to have babies with disrupted sleep, due to the nicotine in their breastmilk.)

One thing I take issue with is the designation of SIDS for obvious cases of suffocation. True SIDS has no known cause, but according to PubMed Health:

Sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) is the unexpected, sudden death of a child under age 1 in which an autopsy does not show an explainable cause of death.

If you wake up and find your baby wedged between the bed and the wall, that's a very explainable cause of death, don't you think? While accidentally falling asleep with your child in an unsafe place is unadvisable, accidents do happen - and safe, long-term co-sleeping hardly falls into this category. This is similar to the number of deaths that happened because of unsafe cribs that were often improperly assembled. While tragic, would they dare call that SIDS? I doubt it.

Among the risk factors for true SIDS are being born to a teen mother (Milwaukee apparently has the highest rate of teen pregnancy in the entire nation), mothers who smoke or use illegal drugs, late or no prenatal care and living in impoverished conditions. Last year, Milwaukee was ranked the fourth-poorest city in the nation. It could be a long-shot, but I'm guessing the average co-sleeping parent doesn't fit this profile very well.

Either way, this is not an adequately objective campaign on how to inform parents of both the potential risks and benefits of co-sleeping. It's already hard enough to get unbiased information as a parent on things like vaccinations, circumcision, breastfeeding and formula use and a myriad of other parenting issues, especially when you seek to do things in a non-conventional manner that breaks tradition and the norm. This isn't helping, other than to create more "mommy wars" hostility and spread even more misinformation.

More reading:
Scientific benefits of co-sleeping - Dr. Sears
Infant Mortality Rates - City of Milwaukee