THE ESSENCE OF ONE

Stella is ready to get her groove back! by Miss Tee

2011-05-24T08:49:00.000-07:00

As a single parent, dating can be a little scary, especially if you're just beginning to put yourself "out there." With everyday life issues, work, bills, family, friends and being a single mother etc… With all of that to do, who has time to even think about dating someone? I started to wonder was I the only single mother out here who felt this way? Now days there is so many rules and regulations to dating, and from a single parent stand point, this brings on a whole other set of rules.

Have you ever dated someone and it started off great and you found yourself really enjoying this time with this person. As time goes by your learning more and more about this person, but now you’re wondering if you should introduce your children to this person? How soon is too soon? There is nobody that can tell you when it’s a good time to include your kids in your new relationship. However speaking from past experience I can say, the more you get to know this person and build a foundation together and you do not included the kids, this could later lead to some serious issues in your relationship. Find out below about a great acronym "CHECK" this can help, also very soon I will have story about this topic “stay tune”!

Don’t let being a single parent stop you from finding someone special, it’s now time for you to step outside your comfort zone and take a leap of faith and enjoy yourself!

Below are some of the following tips to help you adjust your expectations and will prepare you to re-enter the dating world. Email me or leave a comment to let me know what you think?

Consider Why Dating is Important to You

Before you being dating, online or otherwise, give some serious thought to why you want to be in a dating relationship in the first place. Are you hoping for companionship, fun, or validation? Knowing what you're looking for from the outset can help you avoid some of the most common relationship mistakes.

Talk With Your Kids About Your Desire to Date

Being open with your children about your desire to date will make the transition easier for all of you. It's important to remember, too, that your kids may strongly resist the idea of sharing you or giving up hope that you'll reunite with your ex, so be extra sensitive to their feelings and concerns as you prepare them for the reality that you'll soon begin dating.

Decide How You're Going to "Put Yourself Out There"

There are many ways re-enter the dating world, from online dating to asking someone out on your own. Remember, too, that not every date has to be an evening event. It's fine to shart with something more casual like meeting for lunch or a quick drink after work.

Use the Acronym "CHECK" to Make Wise Dating Choices

Whether you're looking through online dating profiles or being introduced to the friend of a friend, it's important to know what you're looking for. The acronym "CHECK" can help. The letters stand for Character, Healthy relationships, Easy to be around, Children, and Kindness.

Know What Your Personal Deal Breakers Are

It's crucial that you know from the very beginning what you will tolerate in a dating relationship and what you will not. These common "deal breakers" can help you avoid heartache down the road and more quickly find satisfaction in your dating relationships.

Plan Ahead for Physical Intimacy

Finally, decisions about birth control and physical intimacy need to be made up front. In addition, consider sharing your choices with a trusted friend who will help you be accountable to your decisions, as well.

Decide Whether to Introduce Dates to Your Children

You may find that introducing dates as "friends" makes this issue easier for your children, but it's important to talk with each date ahead of time about your plans, so that they'll know why you may seem more formal with them in front of your children. Alternatively, wait until things become more serious before introducing your children at all.

Are Pregnancies Really Ever ‘Unplanned’?

2011-05-24T05:02:00.000-07:00

With all of the debate surrounding Planned Parenthood and the obvious right-wing attack on abortion, American women are being forced to reevaluate reproductive responsibility. Although a mere three percent of Planned Parenthood services can be attributed to abortions, the idea of terminating “unplanned” pregnancies is one to be reexamined.

Is getting pregnant after a one-night stand poor planning or a consequence of irresponsibility? After regular unprotected sex with your boyfriend, is it really a surprise to see a pregnancy test register positive? It would appear reproductive rights have become the remedy for poor decision-making.

Excluding the miniscule fraction of abortions performed as a result of rape and incest, the seeds are planted during consensual sex. Many still willingly engage in unprotected sex; and, at best, contraception only protects against pregnancy ninety-nine percent of the time. So, there is always a small chance for fertilization. Therefore, sexually active women are aware that pregnancy is always a possibility; and, since the vast majority of women seeking abortions (over 95 percent) willingly put themselves at risk of becoming pregnant, wouldn’t a more fitting term be unintended or, perhaps, inconvenient.

Nearly half of all pregnancies in the United States are unintentional and four out of 10 of those are terminated by abortion. According to statistics, half of women ages 15-44 who have had one abortion will also have another. Women in their twenties account for 57 percent of induced abortions. Because married women rarely terminate pregnancies, planned or unintended, 45 percent of abortions occur with non-cohabitating women who have never been married. Among the common reasons women give for having abortions are interference with work or school, not wanting to be a single parent and problems with the biological fathers. Things that should be considered before having sex.

When you lay down for intercourse, you are essentially accepting the possibility of getting pregnant and hoping it doesn’t happen. If you don’t want to be a single mother, rational thinking says it would be wise not to sleep with men to whom you are not married. If a child is going to interfere with your career ambitions, maybe you should postpone sex to prevent derailing. As funding dissipates and the reversal of Roe v. Wade looms, women will be tasked with curbing their sexual behavior as it won’t be so safe or easy to get rid of unwanted babies.
The only fool-proof protection against pregnancy is abstinence. So, maybe the real question is, is premarital sex worth it? We are ultimately the controllers of our destinies and responsible for utilizing our gift to reproduce accordingly.

LaShaun Williams is a lifestyle and relationship advice columnist and blogger. Her work has been featured on popular urban sites, such as The Grio, and she has made appearances on the Tom Joyner Morning Show and Santita Jackson Show. She is also the founder of Politically Unapologetic, where she unabashedly discusses culture, life and love. Follow @itsmelashaun on Twitter or visit her on Facebook.

THE FRONT ROW!

2011-05-20T06:33:00.000-07:00

Life is a Theater… Invite Your Audience Carefully. Not everyone is healthy enough to have a front row in our lives. There are some people in our lives. There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance. It’s amazing what you can accomplish when you let go of or at least minimize your time with draining, negative incompatible, not going anywhere relationships or friendships. Observe the relationships around you. Pay close attention. Which ones lift you up, and Which ones lean? Which ones encourage and which ones discourage? Which ones lift and which ones lean? Which ones encourage and which ones discourage? Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going downhill? When you leave certain people do you feel better or do you feel worst? Which ones don’t really understand, know or appreciate you? The more you seek quality respect, growth, peace of mind, love and truth around you…. The easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in the front row and who should be moved to the balcony of your life? Remember that the people that we hang with will have an impact on both our lives and income. And so, we must be careful to choose the people that we hang out with as well as the information with which we feed our minds. We should not share our dreams with NEGATIVE people, nor feed them with

NEGATIVE thoughts.

Who’s in your front row?

Do You Settle For Less In Relationships?

2011-05-19T06:32:00.000-07:00

This is for all my single ladies out there that are now trying to wrap their heads around being single. Never give up on love it's out there!

When you stop looking it comes right to you!

Fear That You Won’t Find Anyone Else

Let’s face it. It’s not easy to find (or be found) by Mr. Right; and unfortunately we’re reminded of this fact quite frequently through our interaction with single girlfriends and news specials specifically targeted to “The Troubled, Single Black Woman’. With this in mind, we grow more skeptical to let go of a relationship in fear of not finding anyone else. For a woman who strongly wants to be in a relationship, the option of being single is less attractive than staying in an unfulfilling relationship.

Hold On In Hopes Of Changing Him

It’s almost a natural instinct for women to think we can change a man’s behavior. You’re spiritual and hope to convince him to love church just as much as you. You want to get married soon, but he doesn’t see marriage in the radar anytime soon. Still, you stick around in hopes of convincing him to see it your way. Although, we’ve all heard it before, we still don’t abide by the principal that people have to want to change in order to change. With this being said, you can’t base your relationship on ‘what-ifs’ or ‘when this happens then…’, because It may never happen. He may never see things your way. If you can’t love him for who he is at the moment, you are doing the both of you an injustice. You deserve someone who has a vision similar to yours and he deserves someone who doesn’t nag him about his lack of vision.

Hold On In Hopes of Changing Ourselves

I’ve been told I’m too picky; but this statement mainly came from men who were on totally different pages that I was. Still, at the time I thought that I was requiring too much and that I needed to change my outlook on relationships and requirements. Now that I look back, what I was asking wasn’t necessarily too picky. Instead, it just wasn’t what the person I was with was willing to give. Lesson learned, you don’t necessarily have to change yourself (unless it’s for the best and self-improvement) but instead change the person you’re with.

You’re Unsure Of What A Healthy Relationship Looks Like

If you’ve never seen a healthy relationship, how are you expected to know what it entails? For this reason, some women may choose to stay in an unfulfilling situation because we don’t know what fulfilling looks or feels like. While I may not have all the answers, I’m certain that if you can barely stand to look at your mate or he irritates you more than he makes you smile, it’s pretty safe to assume that it isn’t fulfilling.

You’re Really Not Ready To Be Single

Some women haven’t mastered the art of enjoying the single life. The word single automatically raises fear. Instead of going back to the single life of loneliness, they stay in a relationship that is secretly just a lonely. Sure, there’s a physical presence of someone else; but if that person isn’t satisfying them it’s the closest thing to being lonely.

Women of Empowerment W.O.E. are doing it once again! SEE HOW YOU CAN JOIN US!

2011-05-03T07:28:00.000-07:00

W.O.E is on the move once again!

It's time once again for our Women of Empowerment Gathering! Our last gathering was a very soul searching event with each woman sharing her ideas and knowledge about life and business!

Don't miss out on this empowering movement!

Come out and take part in this lyfe changing experience!!! And prepare to be inspired and empowered by women who have a passion for giving back...

Enlightening conversations and the exchange of knowledge and ideas will be in the air.

This is where the beginning of movements are born...You don't want to miss this :)

Ladies bring your information regarding your service, organization and/or desire to give of your time or talent..as well as an open heart!

Hope to see you all there, feel free to contact me for any further information!

Iron sharpens Iron....

Twanna Copeland

theessenceofone@gmail.com

Ayneka "Neka" Scott

diamonds_pearls@ymail.com

When:

Saturday, June 4th at 11:00 AM

Where:

"Piccadilly"1265 Mount Zion Rd Morrow, GA 30260

10% off all meals!

What I love about being a black woman!

2011-04-24T18:51:00.000-07:00

We know, we know. Sadly, not all black women love themselves. Low self esteem, environment and a host of other elements can affect how any woman, regardless of race, will feel about herself. But recently an Essence Magazine study found that “African-American women are twice as likely to feel positive about their beauty. That’s certainly encouraging! It’s no coincidence that we appreciate ourselves a tad bit more than other woman. Here are some reasons why…

1. Less Likely to Buy Into Unrealistic Standards

There used to be a time, not too long ago, when a black face on the television screen or a magazine cover was hard to come by. Sure times have changed and black women are featured more frequently but still no where near the rate and frequency of our white counterparts. It’s a double-edged sword. While some talented models, actresses and t.v. personalities miss out on jobs, it also means that we are not as inundated with airbrushed mid sections, lightened complexions and extravagant hair extensions. Instead as little girls, our beauty ideals come from women who were accessible to us. Our mothers, our neighbors, our teachers etc. You know real women.

2. Confidence

This character trait is definitely not limited to black women. Most women who are considered beautiful radiate some level of confidence. We can assume if black women are more comfortable with their beauty, then they’re more likely to be confident in their interactions with other people. It’s a cyclical relationship. Appreciation for your beauty builds confidence and your confidence allows others to readily recognize your beauty.

3. Different Beauty Standards from Mainstream America

Speaking of beauty…ours is a little different. Now don’t get me wrong, we’re grown enough to accept and acknowledge that there is more than one definition of beauty; but you can’t bring up the subject without mentioning us. From our unique, ever-changing tresses, to our high cheekbones, wide hips and rounded bottoms we are truly a sight to behold.

4. Acceptance and Embracement of Ethnic Features

Remember the days when [mainstream] women used to talk about their butts looking big? I remember the first time I heard that as a child. I was too confused. Where I came from a big booty was something you dreamed about, if you weren’t blessed with it genetically. Not so for some people. Go figure. We managed to embrace our assets long before women started oogling over J-Lo and the Booty-Pop became an infomercial hit. We like our wider than button noses and how could I ever forget those luscious lips? Ooo those magnificent lips!

5. Our Skin

Something about the way light reflects off our skin is glorious. No matter your shade, if you look down at your skin in the summer you’ll notice a certain glow. It’s lovely! We can thank Mr. Melanin for that. The extra melanin keeps our skin oilier than other races. While this can be a bit of a hassle, oilier skin delays the affects of

6. Admiration and Celebration of the “thicker”/ “curvier” frame

Since the days of pin-up girls, specifically Marilyn Monroe, the optimal size for models has gotten smaller and smaller. But for better or worse (i.e. obesity) the black community has always celebrated the curves.

7. Diversity of Features

Contrary to stereotypical opinion, black people are some of the most diverse people on the earth. For evidence you need look no further than Africa. People in Egypt look nothing like the people in the Congo. It’s a genetic party over there. I once heard that if the entire population were suddenly wiped out, you could rebuild in Africa. It makes sense. That’s where it all started.

8. Appreciation from the Fellas (regardless of race)

While we don’t need a man to make us feel beautiful, it certainly doesn’t hurt to hear them singing our praises. Back in the days when we didn’t see ourselves in the media, kind of like we do today, we had men who reaffirmed our beauty. And in case “you ain’t know” it’s not just the brothers who are out here checking for us.

9. Knowledge of our history

You must have noticed that people who are culturally aware generally have a greater sense of pride which often translates to a higher self appreciation. In fact there was a study that supported this observation not too long ago. It was this very reason that Black Nationalism focused so heavily on embracing our African heritage, to inspire a sense of pride.

10. Perseverance

For the longest, black women sat at the bottom of the totem pole in this country. You know “the order” white man, white woman, black man, black woman. (Who knows what position the other races fell in.) But despite, this position black women have managed to make the best of a horrible situation. Not only have we served as the backbone of our own communities, we didn’t get lost in the sauce. Black women have made huge gains in the areas of education and business. Sure we have our problems, just like everybody else, but there’s so much to love!

What do you love about being a black woman?

Women of Purpose Presents!

2011-04-20T07:33:00.000-07:00

I want to start off by thanking Diamonds and Pearls for the invite. I myself was spiritually feed by everyone that was present and I want to just say thank you to everyone. Cant wait to do it again next month. I have attached a flyer for Women of Purpose fashion show that will be held this weekend.

Mariana Miley

PLEASE JOIN US FOR FOOD, FASHION & FUN

Saturday April 23, 2011

South Cobb Recreation Center

875 Six Flags Drive SW

Austell, GA 30168

4:00 p.m.

Performances by: TBA

Special Guest Performances by: Gospel Rapper/Minister E-HUD

Music provided by: DJ C Animal

Contact: 678-315-9030 or 678-758-8661

For more info

*** Tickets are $5 - Refreshments will be sold ***

Beyond Greatness Event Planning
"NEW BLOGSITE"
http://www.beyondgreatnesseventplanning.blogspot.com/

The Essence of One first Empowerment Brunch! Learn how you can be a part of this life changing experience!

2011-04-19T05:58:00.000-07:00

Ladies who are of greatness!

What does Empowerment mean?

Refers to increasing the spiritual, political, social, or economic strength of individuals and communities. It often involves the empowered developing confidence in your own capacities.

“ … our stories contain the answers to each other’s questions. What I cannot find in searching through the riches and rubble of my own life may become apparent to me in the witnessing of yours.

“In the passing on of our stories, we gift each other with the power of possibility. When I watch you claim your life and go after your dream, I begin to believe I can do it, too. When I see what you risk to achieve what you want, I think that I, too, could take that chance. When I hear what you have suffered while I see you trudging forward, I believe I can make it to the other side of my own darkness. What can save us if it is not our stories, not the careful sharing of who we are and what we dream for a world whose future rests in our hands?”

-- Jan, from ‘A Waist is a Terrible Thing to Mind’

Ms. Neka and Ms. Tee founders of WOE!

Words cannot express the joy and utter sense of empowerment I felt after our brunch!! It is my pray that you all were touched in the same manner ;-)

I wanted to say Thank You again for giving us your time and sharing so much about yourselves your dreams and your desires.

We will keep the momentum going so be on the lookout for next month’s locations the time will hopefully be the same!! Ladies each of you blessed us beyond measure and we sincerely hope to keep this connection with each of you.... As we Soaring to New Heights!!!

Sincerely

Neka Scott & Twanna Copeland

Check out more pictures from our Empowerment Brunch!

This did not have to happen?

2011-04-16T05:06:00.000-07:00

Is this a face of a killer or a woman who needed help?

I know this story is all over the news and everybody is still trying to wrap their heads around what happen? As a mother of course I was thinking “how could this woman just up and kill herself and her babies? So many other questions came to my mind.

There was a part in this article that stated before this mother took her life and her children's life, she somewhat came to her senses but of course it was too late! I wonder if it was at that moment, she knew no issues were worth her killing herself or her children, and maybe I can move forward and build a better life for me and my children! Of course at this point in time we will never know. I’m sure you can think of at least one friend that you know is also having domestic issues? Of course we don’t want to get involved but you don't have to get involved! Just understand there's nothing wrong with giving a friend some encouraging words at times. You would not believe how words can change someone else's life!

I wonder if a friend or a family member’s encouraging words could’ve saved Lashanda Armstrong and her babies’ lives.

The unhinged mother who drove her minivan off a Newburgh dock and into the Hudson River told her four children that she wasn’t leaving this world alone.
“If I’m going to die, you’re going to die with me,” Lashanda Armstrong told the children before the vehicle sank to the bottom of the river just before 8 p.m. on Tuesday, the only surviving child told authorities.
Armstrong’s 10-year-old son, Lashaun, escaped the doomed family minivan – opening a power window and swimming to safety in the two minutes it took for the vehicle to sink.
But as he wriggled out of the window, his mother snatched his pants leg. “I made a mistake,” she said before finally releasing the boy, the child told authorities.
After swimming to shore, the dripping-wet Lashaun made it to the road, where he was picked up by Meave Ryan, a good Samaritan who took the boy to a nearby firehouse

“He was waving his hands, screaming ‘Help me!’” said Ryan, 31. “He said, ‘My mommy just drove the car into the water."

Shivering and barely able to speak, little Lashaun told firefighters how his mother had launched the van into the river with his siblings inside and how, just moments before, she dialed her dad for help, the kids screaming in the background.
“I’m sorry, I’m going to do something crazy,” Armstrong said, according to the boy’s story
That prompted a 911 call that brought police to her Newburgh home, but it was too late.
Police wouldn’t confirm details of the domestic dispute that preceded the murder-suicide inside the tan van, but neighbors said Armstrong and longtime boyfriend Jean Pierre were frequent fighters in their second-floor home

DON'T MISS OUT YOU STILL HAVE TIME TO MAKE IT!

2011-04-12T13:43:00.000-07:00

You're Invite

Come out and take part in this lyfe changing experience!!! And prepare to be inspired and empowered by women who have a passion for giving back...

Enlightening conversations and the exchange of knowledge and ideas will be in the air.

This is where the beginning of movements are born...You don't want to miss this :)

Ladies bring your information regarding your service, organization and/or desire to give of your time or talent..as well as an open heart!

Hope to see you all there, feel free to contact me for any further information!

Iron sharpens Iron....

Ayneka "Neka" Scott
diamonds_pearls@ymail.com

Twanna Copeland
theessenceofone@gmail.com

When:
Saturday, April 16 at 11:00 AM

Where:
"Piccadilly"1265 Mount Zion Rd Morrow, GA 30260

10% off all meals!

Have you ever done something unhealthy for love?

2011-04-06T12:40:00.000-07:00

Most people, men and women, do want love- and that’s a great goal to have. But are you in a relationship where you continually find yourself going the distance because you think you’re in “love.” Have you ever done unhealthy things or made unhealthy sacrifices for someone you thought you loved? Sometimes we women will stretch ourselves to the limit- all in the name of “love.” And it can to turn out to be quite unhealthy and unhappy for us because sometimes what we think is love really isn’t. And sometimes the one we love doesn’t truly deserve the love we have to give.

Remember this: There is always an emotional and even physical cost to being in love. But there are also wonderful benefits if you’ve found real love. Real love is something that involves work and sacrifice, but it also something that enriches and elevates you to an even better place. It isn’t something where you have to do unhealthy and compromising things to obtain or maintain it.
So before you make any decision for love, think about the cost and benefit. Why? Because your love is too precious to give to just anyone. Here are 5 unhealthy things women often do for love:

1. Give up our identity

Are you the type of women that falls off the radar with friends or abandons your career/hobbies as soon as you fall in love? Not a good move. One of the most unhealthy things you can do for love is abandon what makes you you. Ladies, you should always maintain your identity and independence when in love. That’s what makes you a whole person. That’s what made a man fall for you. And that’s what’s going to keep you whole if the love ever leaves

2. Try to “work with” a man

This is another unhealthy thing women do for love. We try to work with a man that isn’t worth the time, effort, or love. Have you ever dealt with a man that claimed to love you, but then continually disrespected you and the relationship by his behavior? Women need to accept that some men have no sense of integrity or character. And they will say and even do anything to get what they want from a woman that they know loves them. Men like this do not love you. And most importantly, they don’t deserve for you to love them.

3. Have sex to create love

Sometimes women choose to have sex with a man because we think it will strengthen the bond and magically manifest love. The reality is that men can have sex without attachment. That is not the case for women. Recognize and accept that. Love is love, and sex is sex. And it’s not healthy to make love to a man while he’s just having sex with you.

4. Avoid setting standards

I know numerous women that make remarks like “I love him and I know he loves me, so I don’t need him to make a commitment.” Basically what these women are saying is this: I don’t really love myself so I’m fulfilled with whatever “love” he’s giving me. And if I can recognize that, then the man you supposedly “love” can most definitely recognize it as well. It’s not healthy to avoid having a basic set of relationship standards. When a woman has standards it’s because she loves and values herself. And you will never truly find love until you first love yourself.

5. Ignore red flag

What’s another unhealthy thing women do for love? We put aside all logic. And one way we do this is by ignoring red flags. Sometimes the red flags are tiny like if a man tells endless and unnecessary little white lies. And sometimes the red flags are as subtle as a flying brick upside our head. In either case, we ignore the red flag(s) because we think we’re in love. Not a healthy move. When a man subtly or overtly reveals himself to be a certain type of individual, believe it! Do not ignore red flags all in the name of love

Tips for Celibate Singles!

2011-04-01T10:46:00.000-07:00

Thank you so much Wanda for your continuing support and I really needed that kick in my ass! ;oP I promise more stories and interviews to follow. In the words of my Fairy God Mother

"My greatness has just started"!

Jill Scott:

Celibacy Blues Lyrics

This here celibacy thing

Lord, just got somethin’ over me

like an addict, I could really use a thing

You know what I’m talkin’about?

It’s been hard to sleep at night

Night, scratchin’ it right

I get some new batteries almost every night

Lord, this here celibacy thing

The stresses of this world

You know how they come down on a girl

I’m tryin’ to clear my mind

But all I seem to find is this gangsta

Gangsta type of need

People say mind over matter

But I don’t mind what they say

And it don’t matter

This here celibacy thing is workin’ on me

Sometimes, being single comes with being celibate. This is especially so if you have reached the age of 50, don't date and have no social life. But celibacy usually becomes easier with age. Cultural, moral and religious obligations and expectations are also some of the reasons why older single women abstain from sexual relations.
Younger singles are choosing to celibate even with sexual and reproductive freedom these days for various reasons like ...

Don't believe in casual sex
Want to wait until an emotional attachment is developed
Wait until they are legally married
Asexual or having low sex drive
Cautious because they are afraid of contacting diseases like STD and HIV
Avoiding unexpected pregnancy
Went through a very painful and bad childhood experience associated with it

But it doesn't mean that they don't want to have a relationship. They still want to date, look for companionship and attention. But until they are certain, they would rather develop a platonic relationship.

For some people being abstinent is hard. Some find it unusual that there are people who choose to control their libido needs. Celibacy becomes a problem only if it happens in a marriage and if only one partner decides to abstain from getting physical and intimate.

The other disadvantage is that it can become a little difficult to find a date or develop a relationship with those who don't understand their personal choice and decision. To solve the problem, these singles join dating and networking websites for celibate singles. If you do a search, you'll find a few free ones.

If you are thinking of trying to abstain yourself from your urge and desire and test how long you can last, here are some tips.

Focus your mind on something that consumes your thoughts and energy. This has to be something important and that you are passionate about.

Stay away from materials in any form that are erotic or might arouse and stimulate your desires and urges. This includes men.

2011-03-25T09:30:00.000-07:00

You're Invite

Come out and take part in this lyfe changing experience!!! And prepare to be inspired and empowered by women who have a passion for giving back...

Enlightening conversations and the exchange of knowledge and ideas will be in the air.

This is where the beginning of movements are born...You don't want to miss this :)

Ladies bring your information regarding your service, organization and/or desire to give of your time or talent..as well as an open heart!

Hope to see you all there, feel free to contact me for any further information!

Iron sharpens Iron....

Ayneka "Neka" Scott
diamonds_pearls@ymail.com
Twanna Copeland
diamondsandpearls@gmail.com
When:
Saturday, April 16 at 11:00 AM

Where:
"Piccadilly"1265 Mount Zion Rd Morrow, GA 30260

10% off all meals!

"Exciting News about Diamonds & Pearls Empowerment Group"

2011-03-21T13:18:00.000-07:00

Miss Tee with some of the D&P Young ladies

Thank you so much for the e-mails and trust me I will be posting some of your articles very soon! Also to answer a few questions I've received about the D&P girls. As some of you may already know I'm now the Director of the group. Many of the articles and stories I've posted on my blog site are geared towards adults, and my upcoming articles and stories will continue to be for adults eyes only! I do not feel it's appropriate children.

If you would like to continue to follow all of D&P new jounerys I'm so proud to introduce Diamonds & Pearls Empowerment Group Inc. NEW BLOG PAGE!

www.diamondspearlsemp.blogspot.com

Thank you all for your continuing support!

Miss. Tee

A Woman of Courage and this is her story!

2011-02-09T18:20:00.000-08:00

This is not Tunisha but one of our great female officers

Hi Tunisha, thank you so much for taking the time to talk with me about yourself and your life as a single mother. We have so much to talk about let’s start at the top!

Tunisha, can you tell my readers a little about yourself?
Tunisha: I am 30 years of age; I have 3 children ages 14, 08, 02. I am originally from Connecticut. I have resided in Georgia since 2005. I have a career in law enforcement and I have been in law enforcement for almost 5 years now. I go to school full-time; I am working on my Bachelor’s Degree in Criminal Justice. I will have my degree by the summer of 2011. I purchased my first house when I was 28. My hobbies include reading books, exercising, traveling, watching television, cooking, spending time with my kids and family, and I can’t forget sleeping.

You are a police officer is that correct?
Yes, I am a Police Officer in the state of Georgia

How long have you been a police officer?
Tunisha: It will be 5 years in April that I will have been an officer

Why did you want to become a police officer?
Tunisha: There really was no specific reason, why I became a police officer. I don’t think I have some type of heroic story like some people. But, I was involved in a very toxic and abusive relationship and I decided to take a stand for myself and I took action by divorcing and I moved to Georgia to be closer to my immediate family. At the time, I think as a young mother, you need family support rather it’s to help with child care or just plain out mental support. Once I moved to Georgia, I realized that I didn’t have anything because I had given everything up upon divorcing. So, I just started applying at whatever places I thought that I was qualified for and law enforcement is just what the Lord had for me at the time.

WOW, you are very busy lady with three children ages 14, 8 and 2. How do you balance your work life, being a mother and try to have a personal life?
Tunisha: Wow, that’s a very good question, but it’s funny that you ask that. I used to have a hard time balancing my life at times. However, I think the biggest thing that has become a key thing for me to begin to at least balance my life and general things with my kids, is learning and recognizing who I am as a WOMAN. Which I think is very important for any female rather you have kids or not. As I got older, I really thought I knew who I was but, it wasn’t until I really started getting older and began to feel a shift in my mind set, which was the beginning of me understanding who I was as a woman. I began to embrace who I was and I began accepting the things that I have been through and seeing the importance of certain things about my kids and their personalities. It may not have been the dream household, but it was the start to a functioning and structured household. After, I continued to bring structure to my household and push my kids to obtain some type of independency while at home. I began to assess my personal life. I think when I first moved to Georgia, I spent so much time trying to work and accrue back everything that I had lost after my divorce. I forgot all about my personal life, so I didn’t have one for a while. By the time, I started meeting people; it was like a foreign world to me. There were a few times, when I would go out on dates and guys would ask me, what I liked to do for fun and I would simply answer by saying “I don’t know because all I do is work and take care of my children”. They would look at me like I was strange but what they didn’t know, is that I really had no idea what I liked versus what I didn’t like because I had forgot about myself. So, once I continued to search myself, it also helped to put things in perspective even with men. It made a difference in terms of what I did or didn’t expect from them rather it was sexually or not. At the start of my career, I have run into several men that have a problem with the fact that I am a police officer. They would feel intimidated, there were times when I would spend more time on a date trying to re-assure someone that my work and personal life, were separate entities, to the point where I had to tell myself that if I have to re-assure a man that he doesn’t have to be intimidated by me in a relationship, than I didn’t need to be with them. After a few dates, I began to learn that I can’t down play myself for anyone, because I am who I learned shortly that I have to have someone on my level and that knows that regardless of what either one of us do, I am a lady first and a woman first.

Were you ever married to your children’s father?
Tunisha: No, I was never married to any of my kid’s fathers, but I have been married before

Do you have a good relationship with your children's father?
Tunisha: I have a very good relationship with my oldest sons’ father.

What level of involvement does the father play in your children's life?
Tunisha: My kid’s fathers play little to no involvement in my kids’ lives.

You put your life on the line while you’re working, how does this affect you with being a mother?
Tunisha: My job affects me a lot as a mother. Everyday that I get up to put my uniform on I place my self and my kids in jeopardy. I was involved in an incident last year, where I was shot at by a guy that I was chasing. Luckily, no bullets struck me, but I think that incident put my mind back in perspective to allow me to know that people that commit crimes, don’t care about what you have at home. They just don’t want to go to jail and they will do anything under any means necessary to make sure that it doesn’t happen.

Do you find dating as single a mother to be a hard thing to do?
Tunisha: Yes, I do find dating s a single mother to be very difficult. I think in today’s day and age. Females either don’t trust men or we trust men too much to soon, we kind of do not have a gray area. In my case I don’t trust them at all. I have a daughter, and I am terrified of anyone doing anything to her or my son’s. It’s also hard because most men don’t understand just how much being a single mom entails. I have grown through trial and error to stand for something because I am tired of falling for anything and I think with this, it has weaned a lot of people away from me, which is what I want. Men, have become spoiled and its kind of like you have to jump through hoops and do tricks in order to get a man to stick around, and I just don’t have the energy for that and it’s not me. I am very old school with my ways and most men have been pampered by other to the point where they feel like that is not needed.

Last year I posted an article called “Single moms raising girls to remain single”! I received many comments about that article and from what I could tell it made other single mothers start to really question their selves. For me I just wasn’t just thinking about my daughter but also for my son, but of course it would be more emphases for our daughters. What are your feelings about this?
Tunisha: I don’t really have much of a feeling on that one. But, I do think as a single mom, it’s also important for single moms to teach their daughters how they should be treated by a young man or even by a grown man. A single mother should also teach her daughter, how she should carry herself as a young lady/lady. When a single mother has a potential male that she has decided to get serious with its also important for their daughter’s to see how she should be treated. I remember growing up in a two parent household; most people around me would have thought that the way my mother carried herself that as her daughter, I knew what I needed to know as a young lady and that was so far from the truth. I learned about life and how to carry myself as a young lady into developing into a woman on my own. I was never taught how to deal with men, how to put on makeup, how to respect myself so that others would respect me, I learned these things through trial and error in my own life. I am not saying that my mother was not a good mother, I just think as a mother, she didn’t know how to teach me, because her mother never taught her, so it was really a cycle.

Of course being a single mother doesn’t mean we can’t still have hopes and dreams. We both know that yes, maybe it does make things we would like to do a little harder at times, but I wouldn’t change my life for nothing in this world! Can you relate?
Tunisha: I feel that if I could go back and change my life, I would. I think the biggest thing that I would’ve changed it would have been the people that IO chose to have kids by. I think when we decide to carry a child by a man, we need to really think about the traits that child could possibly carry from the men that we choose to lay down with. I will be the first to say that I did not make eh best decision in terms of who I chose to have kids by. I don’t regret my kids, because I love them, I just regret their fathers, because the areas where my kids fathers have fell short, it has caused me to have to pick up the slack. Sometimes it can be very, very, very hard to take on more responsibility than you can really handle. I know God won’t put more on you than you can bare, but I could use a little help at times because I get weary sometimes. I took on a lot of responsibility at a young age. I had my first child when I was in the tenth grade; I was a baby having a baby. I set myself up for things that I shouldn’t have been concerning myself with. I grew up to fast and I missed out on a lot of my childhood, because I had grown up dreams. There area certain thing that I just can not teach my sons’ and having positive active fathers around definitely helps hands down.

At this time are you currently working on any projects?
Tunisha: I am working on purchasing my second house and being able to train and complete at least 2-3 marathon races this year. So the projects that I am working on are more personal ones more so than anything.

Thank you so much Tunisha!
If you have any further questions for Tunisha please send them to me at www.theessenceofone.gmail.com

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

2011-02-01T05:33:00.000-08:00

It’s been a while since I have written on my blog site. There have been so many good things that are going on in my life. I would like to thank my readers who have sent me e-mails requesting more articles, interviews with other single parents, and more stories about the Diamond & Pearls Empowerment Group.

Just one of the great things that has been going on in my life, and I’m excited to announce, I just accepted the position as the Director of Diamonds & Pearls Empowerment Group. I’ve been very busy working with the Founder of the group in getting our yearly agenda, new letters and our website together. This has been very exciting and a bit time consuming, but I wouldn’t have it any other way! I’m currently working on our 2011 Diamonds & Pearls Kickoff celebration story with pictures so you all can see how we have grown from 8 young ladies to know 20 members! This group has truly changed not only my life but my daughter’s and our relationship.

A New Year should also come with different changes or approaches to the way we do things, or affect the people we have in our life. Last year was a great learning experience for me and this year I would like to share some past life experience with you and of course my future experiences I’m about to face.

This New Year for me is about getting to know who I am as a person! Yes, I have all of these positive things going on in my life and I’m so thankful and grateful for all it. On a personal note I’ve also made some changes that some people in my life are still scratching their heads over. (lol!) I’ve been dating since I was 16 years old and been sexually active since I was 18 years old. Like any other woman I had my fair share of relationships, and last year I ended an almost two year relationship, and from that relationship I’ve learned so much about myself. Once that relationship was over my first instinct was to get back out there again and start dating, and I did just that!

In doing that I found that something was missing, not the man of my dreams, but me as a person! All of these questions started to come to my head, what do I really want, is it that important to have a man in my life? Don’t get me wrong I don’t want to be alone however it comes a time in one’s life that we have to make changes to our life. I did just that and it’s time for me to relax my mind and body, so yes that does mean I’m now “CELIBATE”! Yes voluntarily celibate. For all the women out there who are also celibate you understand that this is definitely not a GAME! For all the women who have ever thought about it or even tried it can understand, it really does take a stronger person to make this type of choice! So that is just a taste of some the articles I’m currently working on.

Thank you all for your continuing love and support and please keep the ideas coming!

Miss Tee

YOU KNOW YOU’RE GETTING OLDER WHEN…

2010-12-14T15:45:00.000-08:00

I was reading one of my favorite blog sites and I saw this article and I just knew I had to post this. Only my old school people will read this and "do one of two things". LYAO because you know this is so true or still LYAO because you know that this is so TRUE! LOL

When you were younger, you really didn’t think past 21. Now that you’ve crossed that threshold, all this “getting old stuff” is pretty new. Why does a bottle of wine and your couch sound a lot more appealing than a night at the club? Are those laugh lines? Why didn’t that bouncer ask you for your driver’s license?

1. You have to translate texts from your younger relatives.
“wUz Uppppp!?!!?!! Thnx 4 comMinnng 2 my gaaaaAaamEeee!!! Ur welcs 4 da tiX!!” That translates to “What’s up? Thanks for coming to my game. You’re welcome for the tickets.” Poor you. Maybe you should invest in an under-22 translation dictionary.

2. Music from your high school days is now referred to as “old school.”
Yes, your favorite Jodeci, Wu-Tang and SWV songs are now officially on the old school radio stations. * Le sigh *

3. The youngsters in your life de-friend you or block you on Facebook.
You are now a stupid grown up with a stupid job. No longer a cool kid. You just don’t “uNder$tanNd” them!

4. You think you’re about to smash that pizza, but it smashes you.
Back in college you used to inhale pizza like it was air, but now you eat a couple slices and you get the itis. What gives?

5. Your abs seem to be in hiding.
A few sit-ups on the weekend used to have your abs on washboard status. These days, you’re still trying to suck in your stomach to put on your favorite jeans AFTER you do 100 crunches.

6. You find yourself giving rowdy kids “the look.”
Those loud obnoxious groups of teens in the restaurant or movie theater are now intolerable to you. You actually find yourself thinking “Where are their parents?”

7. You have to stop yourself from screaming, “Boy, pull your pants up!”
Like seriously, do these little boys have to have their entire behinds hanging out? Why is this considered attractive? No, really. Please tell us.

8. Your high school classmates look ancient now.
Have you ever re-connected with high school friends on Facebook and been like “Daaaaamn?!” They look so much older than you. How could this person possibly be your peer? Yes, it has happened and it is true. You are that old.

9. You have ever uttered the phrase “You don’t know nothin’ about this.”
Whether it’s a song, a movie, a dance move or whatever, if you have EVA said “You don’t know nothin’ about this,” you are definitely getting old.

BONUS: You realize YOU are the “old” person dancing alone to your “jam” in the club.
You used to clown that old dude in the club who would get out and dance in the middle of the floor by himself when the DJ put on that “jam” from 15 years ago. Now, sadly, you are that person and probably muttering to yourself “You don’t know nothin’ about this” while you two-step to your memories. Gone ‘head grandma/pa.

What have you noticed about yourself that lets you know you’re getting old.

You can read this and more on www.madamenoire.com

DIAMONDS & PEARLS CHANGING THE WORLD ONE SMALL STEP AT A TIME! PART 2

2010-12-13T20:06:00.000-08:00

Ms. Neka with her D&P girls and our new friends!

After the Diamonds and Pearls luncheon the girls were on their way to Women’s Shelter, this was not the first community service that Diamonds and Pearls has volunteered their time. However this is the first time our girls were going to see and learn a very valueable lesson on giving back to our community!

The girls having fun in the play area.

The girls were excited about meeting the families from the shelter and so was the D&P mom’s. We all had no idea what we were in store for? We drove up to a nice white house that seemed just like any other home you would see in the suburbs.

Director Ms.Shundrea

Once we walked into the house we were greeted by the very sweet and kind Director "Ms. Shundrea". Lurking around the corner were three beautiful young ladies giggling and running in and out of the living room, while looking at us with BIG smiles on their faces. Ms. Shundrea explained to us how the shelter runs and what are the house rules.

Our D&P Ladies ready to make a change!

We followed Ms. Shundrea and the three young ladies to the entertainment and play room. In that room there was also two other children and their mothers. The D&P girls stepped right into action and started to entertain the children. The children from the shelter showed some of our girls their bedrooms that they shared with their mother. They also talked about their life living in the shelter.

The real excitement came when a very special guest arrived and stoled the Show!

The children almost lost their minds when they saw Santa and all the great gifts and food he brought for them!

There were so many smiling faces, there was so much happiness, excitement, enthusiasm, joy and love through at the room! I stood there and watched all the girls and mom's interact with each other, crying with each other, and hugging each other!

I also watched how the children of the center was so happy to see Santa and thanked him for all the gifts he brought them. It was at that time I found myself feeling overwhelmed with emotions! To see and know for a fact that our D&P girls not only help two families to have a Wonderful Christmas, but they also learned a valuable lesson that day!

This is what Diamonds and Pearls is all about empowering, encouraging and learning from one another! Of course all of this could not be made possible without the love and support of our D&P mom's! The below women are the Diamonds and Pearls moms who are all very unique women, and I'm so proud and blessed to call each one of these women my friends!

D&P mom's also playing it forward!

Doing the Most We Can to Help Everyone

Victims of domestic violence come in every color, at every income and education level, in every part of the world. Right here in Georgia, over 1000 women are reportedly abused daily. Can you really help them all? Can you?
Haven House says yes, YOU can. With your help, Haven House (formerly Flint Circle Council on Family Violence, Inc.)

Make a Donation
Why Donate
Your donations not only help to bring victims of domestic violence to more secure environments, but they also help to provide community education that will STOP the cycle of violence in Henry, Jasper, Butts, and Lamar Counties.

How to Donate
Website Donations
Donations to (formerly Flint Circuit Council on Family Violence, Inc.) can be made easily through our website by clicking the link below. Through www.NetworkForGood.org a third party donation administrator, your transaction is encrypted and secured to ensure that your funds will be used for the good that you’ve intended.

DIAMONDS & PEARLS FIRST ANNUAL LUNCHEON PART 1

2010-12-12T19:42:00.000-08:00

Diamonds & Pearls with founder D&P founder Neka Scott

What an amazing year Diamonds and Pearls has had so far! D & P started off with just 8 young ladies and now we've grown to 15 young ladies in counting. This incredible group started from one phenomenal woman Mrs. Neka Scott! Her vision and creative ideas are limitless, her true dedication, determination and her willingness to keep moving for her Doll's is all that matters to her! This is just the beginning for this wonderful group and I'm so humbled and thankful to be apart of D&P and to help empower our young ladies!

The girls at their luncheon

Neka making a announcement to girls before their gift exchange.

Diamonds and Pearls First Annual Luncheon was held at a local Chilis Restaurant with all of the D&P young ladies in attendants. During the luncheon the girls exchanged their Secret Santa gifts. Prior to the girls gift exchange Ms. Neka made a announcement that after the luncheon, we were all going to visit a Women's Shelter to spend some time with the women and their children. We would also give each child from the shelter their toys from our Toy Drive. I was so emotional and very proud to see all the young ladies getting very excited about this!

There was so much excitement and positive energy flowing throught out the restaurant. The other wonderful part to this day was the young ladies had know idea how they were about to change two families lives!

This was just the beginning of Diamonds and Pearls journey stay tune for Part 2.

“Somebody almost walked off wid alla my stuff” by: Ntozake Shange

2010-12-06T17:39:00.000-08:00

I love Tyler Perry to pieces but at this present time I have yet to see his movie“For coloured girls who have considered suicide when the rainbow is enuf”. Almost everyday I would hear from my family, friends and co-workers talk about this movie. Not only would they talk about the movie but also about this poem in the movie called "My Stuff". Once I finished reading this beautiful poem I knew I had post it also. I hope you like it too!

somebody almost walked off wid alla my stuff  not my poems or a dance i gave up in the street  but somebody almost walked off wid alla my stuff

like a kleptomaniac workin hard & forgettin while stealin  this is mine/this aint yr stuff/ now why don’t you put me back & let me hang out in my own self

somebody almost walked off wit alla my stuff  & didn’t care enuf to send a note home sayin  i was late for my solo conversation  or two sizes to small for my own tacky skirts

what can anybody do wit somethin of no value on a open market/ did you getta dime for my things/ hey man/ where are you goin wid alla my stuff/ to ohh & ahh abt/ daddy/ i gotta mainline number  from my own shit/ now wontcha put me back/ & let  me play this duet/ wit silver ring in my nose/ honest to god/

somebody almost run off wit alla my stuff/  & i didnt bring anythin but the kick & sway of it  the perfect ass for my man & none of it is theirs  this is mine/ ntozake ‘her own things’/ that’s my name  now give me my stuff/ i see ya hidin my laugh/ & how i s it wif my legs open sometimes/ to give me  some sunlight/ & there goes my love my toes my chewed  up finger nails/ niggah/ wif the curls in yr hair/ mr. louisiana hot link/

i want my stuff back/ my rhytums &; my voice/ open my mouth/ &; let me talk ya  outta/ throwin my shit in the sewar/ this is some delicate  leg & whimsical kiss/ i gotta have to give to my choice/ without you runnin off wit alla my shit/ now you cant have me less i give me away/ &; i waz doin all that/ til ya run off on a good thing/

who is this you left me wit/ some simple bitch  widda bad attitude/ i wants my things/ i want my arm wit the hot iron scar/ & my leg wit the  flea bite/ i want my calloused feet & quik language back in my mouth/ fried plantains/ pineapple pear juice/  sun-ra & joseph & jules/ i want my own things/ how i lived them/ & give me my memories/ how i waz when i waz there/ you cant have them or do nothin wit them/

stealin my shit from me/ dont make it yrs/ makes it stolen/ somebody almost run off wit alla my stuff/ & i waz standin  there/ lookin at myself/ the whole time  & it waznt a spirit took my stuff/ waz a man whose  ego walked round like Rodan’s shadow/ waz a man faster n my innocence/

waz a lover/ i made too much  room for/ almost run off wit alla my stuff/ & i didnt know i’d give it up so quik/ & the one runnin wit it/ don’t know he got it/ & i’m shoutin this is mine/ & he dont  know he got it/ my stuff is the anonymous ripped off treasure  of the year/

did you know somebody almost got away wit me/ me in a plastic bag under their arm/ me  danglin on a string of personal carelessness/ i’m spattered wit  mud & city rain/ & no i didnt get a chance to take a douche/ hey man/ this is not your perogative/ i gotta have me in my  pocket/ to get round like a good woman shd/ & make the poem in the pot or the chicken in the dance/

what i got to do/ i gotta get my stuff to do it to/ why dont ya find yr own things/ &; leave this package  of me for my destiny/ what ya got to get from me/ i’ll give it to ya/ yeh/ i’ll give it to ya/ round 5:00 in the winter/ when the sky is blue-red/ & Dew City is gettin pressed/ if it’s really my stuff/ ya gotta give it to me/ if ya really want it/ i’m  the only one/ can handle it

-ntozake shange. “For coloured girls who have considered suicide when the rainbow is enuf”
Photo Credits: Former residents of a group of illegal structures pick through the debris of what was once their homes after the Nairobi City Council tore down the structures on the night of December 16th, 2009.

DIAMONDS & PEARLS ARE PLAYING IT FORWARD!

2010-12-05T13:55:00.000-08:00

Diamonds & Pearls Toy Drive 2010

Diamonds and Pearls held their first Toy Drive and many family and friends participated in helping our community to give back during these difficult times. We were so surprised and humbled at the amount of donations we received.
THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH!

One of our beautiful family's donating their toys.

Even the babies came out to give their toys!

Ms. Angela dropping off her donation to the Toy Drive!

Toy Drive beginning Oct.1st-Dec.10th 2010 we are asking for donations of an unwrapped toy or gift for ages 2-18 both male and female. We are collecting for 3 different shelters this year and in addition to toys we’re asking for books, bibles (youth and adult) and inspirational material as well. While your donations are much appreciated your time is also welcomed. Please let me know if you would like to assist in anyway!!

It's so very important that we do not forget how blessed we are, for all the material things and people that we have in our lives at this time! Also never forget that our life always have twisted and turns to it. We never no if at one point in time in our lives we may need help also. This is why it's so important for you to give back if you can.

Thank you all once again and our Toy Drive is still open until December 10, 2010.

For more infomation you can call Neka Scott 678-389-1309 or send an email toneka_pinkdiamonds@yahoo.com or theessenceofone@gmail.com

D&P Founder Neka Scott and one of her good friends also dropping
off her Toy donation.

Also one of Ms. Scott beautiful friends playing it forward!

DIAMONDS & PEARLS TOY DRIVE

2010-12-03T15:07:00.000-08:00

It’s that time of year again, time to give back!! We will be hosting a Toy Drive beginning Oct.1st-Dec.10th 2010 we are asking for donations of an unwrapped toy or gift for ages 2-18 both male and female. We are collecting for 3 different shelters this year and in addition to toys we’re asking for books, bibles (youth and adult) and inspirational material as well. While your donations are much appreciated your time is also welcomed. Please let me know if you would like to assist in anyway!!

For more infomation you can call Neka Scott 678-389-1309 or send an email to neka_pinkdiamonds@yahoo.com or theessenceofone@gmail.com

ALWAYS KEEP IT REAL AND NATURAL!

2010-11-30T19:19:00.000-08:00

Going natural is the new trend for many African-American women. We've got the story of a Florida news anchor whose process lead to a ratings increase when you read on...

And yes, we're WELL aware the story came out over a week ago. But we felt this is a positive story that can never get too much attention and we wanted to post it here as well. Chill.

Rochelle Ritchie of WPTV-TV in West Palm Beach, Florida decided to let her hair go 'natural' and let viewers see the transformation. During the process, the ratings of Ritchie's show increased. When she first told the idea to the news director, a white man, he had no idea about the process. The news director said," I had no clue this was an issue. I never heard about it, and I had African American friends. I instantly bought into this story. I had not seen this story done. It brings up a safety concern." His only concern was that the viewing audience wouldn't care but the feedback proved positive.

Ritchie also posted her story on a website.

"Making the decision to go natural was not an easy one, especially being a black female reporter. After graduating Western Kentucky University in 2004, I accepted an editor position at a local TV station in my home of Lexington, KY. I had sent out tons of resume tapes hoping to one day be a reporter. But I didn’t get one interview with my relaxed shoulder length hair. One day an anchor, black female, told me I needed to get extensions if I wanted to land a job. I got extensions and made a new tape with my new look and I started getting calls immediately. From there the belief that I needed extensions in order to be hired set in. I spent more money on my hair than anything. In six years I spent $9600, my student loans are $9500, so that should give you an idea of where my priorities were.
“The story about going natural developed while I was having a conversation on the phone with a friend at work. My producer heard me saying, ‘I am going natural, I am tired of wigs, weaves and relaxers.’ She (producer) asked me what I meant by that and I showed her YouTube videos of black women who were on the journey of going natural. She was stunned and said, ‘Rochelle that would make a great story for sweeps.’ I pitched the idea and with her support as well as our female anchor they allowed me to do it. My news director’s response was great. His only concern was just keeping up with the process of my story and hair. My general manager is a great guy and totally supported me as well.
The fear of getting a new job with my new look does not scare me because I believe my work and passion for this business will shine through.
“I have had such an AMAZING response from the community. People of all genders and races have completely supported me with positive feedback. Of course if there were any negative emails my news director does not send those to me. But personally I haven’t gotten one email or Facebook comment that was negative. A matter of fact many of my white and Latino colleagues say I look more professional. I believe this as well. I feel I look more polished and sharp. I also feel like I think better without all that fake hair on my head! lol….
“For my ‘black female reporter hopefuls’ I say let your work show your ability to be a good, excuse me a great reporter. My story is a way for me to pave the way for black women’s hair to be acceptable not just in the professional world but on TV! I would say if you are natural. Keep it neat. And if you are worried about getting a job the fabulous thing is we can straighten our hair for the interview and go back to our beautiful curls when we leave.
“Do I have any regrets? Yes I do. I regret denying my natural beauty. I regret falling into the belief that I needed to look a certain way to get into this business instead of believing in my ability as a reporter. I regret allowing someone to cover me up. But no more! This is me, Rochelle Ritchie a natural, professional and happy television reporter. And I feel more confident now than ever before and look forward to climbing the ladder of success with all my kinky curls.”

Please watch this I'm sure you will learn a thing or two about yourself or just learn!

http://www.wptv.com/dpp/news/local_news/special_reports/Special-Report%3A-Going-Natural

HOW TO REFORM A DEADBEAT DAD: By Demetria Irwin

2010-11-26T08:43:00.000-08:00

Maybe the father of your child isn’t on some Maury Povich level of denial and ridiculousness, but still has deadbeat tendencies. Spotty financial contributions, sometimey acknowledgement of your child’s milestones and a general lack of effort to establish a deep bond, are all sure signs that you’re dealing with a dead beat-ish dad. What’s a single mom to do? If you think the father of your child has the potential to be a better father, but needs some prodding to get things going, try out these tips. Is it fair to you to have to take responsibility for facilitating a father/child bond? Hell naw, but you’re doing this for your child’s sake. It’s worth it. You are attaching training wheels to the relationship and the hope is that one day the relationship will balance and continue on it own without so much effort on your part.

Diamonds and Pearls are doing something amazing again! By: Miss Tee

2010-11-18T17:52:00.000-08:00

The Diamonds & Pearls young ladies

Diamonds and Pearls and their Mom’s came together for a great cause! The girls made gift baskets full of great items for the Christian Children’s Village for the holidays.

The Christian Children's Village Care Baskets

The Children's Village at Christian City offers life services, and safe haven for children in crisis, ages 5-17. Often, the children are victims of abuse, neglect and/or abandonment. The commitment is to mister to the needs of the children and their families by brining about a healthy reunification. In circumstances where reunification is not possible, our goal is to provide a safe and loving home environment where they can feel nurtured.

The girls hard at work making their care baskets.

The Children's Village is built on the Biblical foundation of family. Christian City home for Children, Inc. supports this model of care with children and house parents living together as a family unit. Each Child is given unique opportunities you develop as an individual and as an interdependent family member.

The child's natural or biological family is vital to the family model of care. Both the child's natural family and our staff work together as a team for the best interest of every child in our care. To preserve the family unit and prepare young adults for independent living.

Diamonds & Pearls Mom's

Crystal and Niya showing off their baskets.

When my daughter was younger I allowed her to join the Girls Scouts but as my child gets older I see that she loves to be a social butterfly. It was extremely important for me to find the right group to have my child involved with. I have been so blessed to have found the right group of young ladies for her to learn from and with! I’ve had many questions from other mothers that after reading Diamonds and Pearls adventure they wanted to know more about this wonderful group!

Diamond & Pearls founder Neka Scott

Diamonds and Pearls was founded by a phenomenal woman named, Mrs. Neka Scott. Mrs. Scott formed the Diamonds and Pearls empowerment group to encourage and empower girls as they transition from pre-teens to teenagers. Diamonds was chosen to convey, how one must shine in their own light to carry themselves with poise and purpose. Pearls are simply the innocence that dwells on the inside, our priceless goods that shape who we are and will be in life. These things make us unique and special in every way!

If you are interested in joining or have more questions you can reach Neka at diamonds_pearls@ymail.com or call 678-389-1309.

There is so many great things that D & P are now working on and helping to change in our community. More about D&P Toy Drive to come!