But seriously, I wanted to be a supermodel like Cindy Crawford or Claudia Schiffer. I wanted that long, gorgeously curled, fluffed and blown out hair. Clothes dripping from my closet and chairs with diamonds and jewelry all around me. Yeah I was a dreamer. I won’t even go into the dreams of exotic travel, being catered to at my every whim.

I wasn’t in pagaents or out actively trying to pursue this dream (instead thinking it happened like in the movies, where I’m standing at a skee-ball machine at Chuck E Cheese and a guy tells me how gorgeous I am and if I’ve ever modeled), but I have had two wannabe supermodel moments and both were epic FAILs.

Fail #1

In  high school, I worked for Wilson’s Leather and we had to outfit women for a mid-level fashion show downtown. We helped them get dressed, provided looks and brought clothing for them to wear down the runway. It was fun! The organizers even left the runway up after the show so after everyone cleared out, I got up there and did a little walk, pretending I was at NYC Fashion Week and my co-worker cheered me on. But my joy was crushed when the janitor looked at me and said, “you’d never make it.” FAIL.

Fail #2

Once I got contacts and became not so ugly looking, I went to a model scouting in Wisconsin (by the airport, lovely) and was selected to go on to the “next round” meaning that I go to Chicago and actually be presented to scouts from several agencies. Literally, I felt like I was on cloud nine. So my mom and I go to Chicago and I stand in line with all these girls who get to actually walk a runway with lights and backstage and everything and smile and then I remember clearly walking down the runway, feeling like hot sh*t and then a guy looking at me, looking down at a profile picture he had in front of him and crossing my name off his list. C-R-U-S-H-E-D. And when no one wanted to meet with me after that point, I was released to go home to Wisconsin. And then the next day my car died when I tried to drive back to Minneapolis. The dream pretty much died there. FAIL.

Now I watch my Project Runway and Beautiful Life (pre-cancellation) and ANTM and realize, I’m not model material, but in my own head and safety of my private apartment, I am a little supermodel, with hips, petite frame and a little weight on her.

And I’m smizing the sh*t out of my walk.

So if you could be a supermodel, what you would you like to model? Or what is your secret profession dream? Since I’ve had two supermodel FAILs, it might be time to look into my fallback: secret agent a la Angelina Jolie.

Review blog update: I know, I’ve been slacking on this, but a new review of Neutrogena Healthy Skin Enhancer is up. It’s my foundation-alternative (especially when it’s hot outside)

But let’s move on to my topic of conversation tonight: the fact that I have zero sense of direction.

I have no idea why sometimes I have this problem getting from point A to B, but I remember failing compass work at camp as a kid. Maybe that sealed my fate.

When I moved to Chicago, I thought I was getting better with direction because I regularly travel certain routes and the city is based on a “grid” system (which I don’t understand, but still.) And with the lake as my point of reference, I do pretty well.

That is until I get outside of the city. And then all bets are off because I get all turned around and confused.

Okay that can still happen within parts of the city, but not as regularly.

And last night when Jamie and I headed out to the a magical place known as…Chicago’s suburbs, we got so lost. We followed the directions the interwebs gave us but the internet is a liar because we so did not end up where we should have.

Technology FAIL.

What is the point of Google Maps, etc. when they take you to the wrong place? WTH?

So after stops at two separate gas stations, we were back on track (thanks to the help of a nice man).

I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve been to the suburbs and I’m such a novice because, well I don’t have a car and the suburban train intimidates me (sad that I’m afraid of a train? Yeah I know). So I usually stay city-bound.

And now that I live in the city where it’s well-lit almost all the time, it’s amazing how different of a driver I am when I drive back in Wisconsin. I moved from being an aggressive driver (with mild road rage) to being overly cautious. Like 70-year-old grandma cautious. Driving at night suddenly makes me nervous (it’s so dark!) and parallel parking is all but impossible.

I will stick to my work as an awesome co-pilot and hopefully not have to work with a compass any time soon.

Do you have a bad sense of direction? Or do you get lost easily?

Oh that’s right, the pain train has left the station, woo woo! Woo woo!

So here’s what I’ve done to date:

• Started logging my food again (a PITA)

• Try new gym classes

• Avoid going right back to the elliptical machine

Let’s take a closer look.

Logging food:

I won’t lie, I really hate doing this, but I know it’s necessary. It’s tedious and often finding the right food to log and calculating the right amount can take some time. But so far it’s kept me on track calorie-wise and helping me make better choices. Plus, my inheritantly lazy nature often keeps me from snacking because I don’t want to log it. Wow that sounded sad.

And despite one slip with Texas chocolate sheet cake at work today (I really couldn’t help myself), I’ve stayed in my calorie ranges. I haven’t seen a lot of results yet, but I feel leaner and I know if I stick with it, I’ll start losing the weight slowly again. Goal is to drop what I’ve put on by February.

New gym classes:

This has been fun and PAINFUL at the same time. So far I’ve tried a variety of things: yoga, Pilates, dance class, extreme athletic conditioning and cardio cross training and its been intereting.

I’ve also learned the following things:

• I am Pilates-challenged. Holding your neck up and keeping you legs at a 45 degree angle with your feet in a Pilates “V” = insanely difficult

• I like high energy cardio classes, but the first time I took one, I could not move my arms, sit down, bend over or wash my hair without being in excruciating pain. And I plan to go back for more

• I am ridiculously uncoordinated, but in dance class, I can shake my moneymaker!

• A 5lb and 8lb weight and cause more muscle pain than anything 20lbs or above

• I need to learn basic yoga poses before going into classes, I easily look like I don’t know what I’m doing

• When several people refer to your teacher as “the devil,” that is not a good sign

The adjustment has been difficult but I like mixing up the classes and next on my list: SPIN!

NO MERCY!

And finally, I only went back to the old gym routine once this week because I got out of work late and missed all the classes. Seriously, 5:30 p.m. classes suck a**. Some of us have full-time jobs and can’t make it there and be changed by then! Geez.

So the adjustment is still in process, but I think things are on the right track. And eventually all parts of my body will stop hurting when I work out and do the classes. I cannot wait for that day!

Question for tonight: How do you like to stay active? Do you like high energy classes or more calm-natured classes like Pilates or yoga? How sore have you ever been after a serious class?

My compliment for today: First, you guys were sweet to leave me some on the last post so I thought I’d share what I told myself today as part of my experiment. I said, “Jess you really kicked some a** dancing to Single Ladies at the gym tonight. Nice job, now put a ring on it an ring on it and go home.”

Motivational speaking at its best.

And I couple that icebreaker with my freakishly observant nature.

If you told me once (even while drunk) that your mother’s cousin’s sister’s niece twice removed was admitted to the hospital last month for routine tests, I will remember that and when I see you again, ask you how she’s doing. Seriously, I will.

I also strongly believe in being positive and giving positive feedback to people I know, am friends with and even manage at work. If you do a good job or if I like something, I will tell you.

So I recently started noticing that I’m big on complimenting people.

This includes complimenting hair style/color, makeup, purse, clothing, shoes. I do it because I want to and especially because I know it gives a nice little boost to someone’s day.

But while I compliment others, I don’t do the same to myself. I am so observant of others and pay attention, that I don’t do the same thing to me.

Maybe it’s because I’m my own worst critic, but instead of beating myself up, I need to give myself a break and not be so mean and rather, find something positive to call out so I don’t get too negative.

So from now on, I will continue to compliment people when I want to, but also do the same thing to me. If my hair is looking good that day, I’m going to say it out loud. If I get through a particularly though day without going insane, well, I’m going to tell myself that I did a great job. Don’t worry, this stuff can be my affirmation at home so you don’t see me in an elevator blurt out, “Jess you look awesome today, way to go!”

Things are already depressing enough on the news, why not cut yourself some slack and give credit where it’s due?

That’s my plan, a little experiment to see if that makes a daily difference.

What about you? Do you do something each day to give yourself a little boost of kick in the a**? Or are you also freakishly observant?

Every morning, I get up, shower and try to put together something cute to wear to work. Then when I actually get into work, I realize my office building is f*cking freezing and I need to usually add one to two more layers of clothing over my cute outfit to keep myself from shaking at my computer.

Dramatic? Hardly.

But when I reach for a sweater at work, I have options! Why? Because I have two at my desk, along with a lovely assortment of shoes. Right now, I have four pairs of shoes at my desk (all black, two flats and two heels) to change in to when I arrive at work in sneakers.

One girl I used to sit by had a Rubbermaid bin of shoes at her desk. I swear that bin had 10-12 pairs of heels. I wondered what shoes were even left at her apartment.

People may tease me for this, but collecting a mini-closet at work is easier than you think. It starts when you leave one pair of shoes at your desk by accident, then the next day you think, “well I’m going to wear them at work anyhow, so I’ll just leave them there.” Then the shoe stockpile starts multiplying like bunnies and suddenly the only shoes you have at home are sneakers and sandals.

But when young professionals have to be prepared for anything, it’s not uncommon to keep extra clothes at your desk, especially if you work really long hours. I draw the line at pants and extra shirts though because the one time I’ll want to wear them at home, I’ll remember they’re in my desk drawer, which is not clean at all.

I’m trying to slowly take a few of my pairs of shoes home, but I’m sure it’s more likely that they’ll be multiplying at my desk again, especially with winter coming up.

Do you have a mini-closet at your desk? If so, what do you stockpile? Shoes? Sweaters? Jackets?

I LOVE Halloween in Chicago. People go all out here and it’s so fun to see creative costumes and people doing everyday things, like riding the bus or buying groceries in costume too.

But when it comes to Halloween, I am more an observer than participant. In fact, I don’t regularly dress up in costume or go hunting for one because I’m honestly not THAT creative.

But, this year I had a formal Halloween party to attend by a wonderful hostess who asked us to come in costume…and when she heard I wasn’t a big costume person, she encouraged me to try. And I DID!

And when I almost hit my frustration limit costume shopping, I found her…Candy. That is the name of a sassy wig that called to me the moment I saw her. It wasn’t even her platinum, blue or black locks that called to me either, it was the cotton candy HOT PINK version that screamed my name.

I have always wanted to have hot pink hair. Yes, the inner wannabe bad a** in me wanted hot pink hair to say “f*ck you” to the man and rebel. Of course, after I found out I had to bleach my hair to fully dye it pink…well, the more responsible part of me came out and my hair stayed brown or blonde.

But for a reasonable price, I could solve my costume dilemma and have something I always wanted. Hello! Killing two birds with one stone.

Throw in some cheap studded cuffs and I’m ready to rock and f*cking roll!! Wahhhhh!!!

Despite having to adjust the punk outfit a little bit due to freezing temps in Chicago, I made it work. And I think Tim Gunn would be very proud.

So here’s me in a pseudo 80s punk rock look. I think the pink hair works on me.

I am so fierce

(Also, this was taken at 1 a.m. so quality did suffer)

And unbeknownst to me, homeless men loved my costume too. Three of them commented on the hair while I was downtown. Pink hair = men magnet. YES!

What was your Halloween costume this year? Or what was your favorite costume you wore as a kid? How was everyone’s weekend too? Indulge in a little candy yourself? :)

Review blog: Yes, I’ve been deliquient on this but I promise to do better. So check out why I love NARS MakeUp Primer over Smashbox’s primer.

Some of the neighbors are a little kooky too, I’ve talked before about an issue I’ve had in the laundry room and yes, a body has been carried out of my building too. But hey, it’s near the lake and rent is pretty reasonable!

Along with the elderly, slightly crazy tenants, the last few next door neighbors I’ve had have been new college graduates who love their loud music and giggling very loudly at odd hours. Plus, two girls squeezed into a studio? Very Three’s Company (sort of).

But recently I got a new next door neighbor. A boy (more like a twenty something guy) who is, well…HOT.

I met Ian (that’s his name!) when I was coming home from the gym and we were waiting for the elevator (so Sleepless in Seattle – sort of).  He introduced himself and we got to talking and then suddenly he’s following me to my apartment.

Yes, I had a momentary panic where I thought he might try to rob me, but fortunately, he was following me because he was going to his apartment, next door to mine.

To date, we’ve only had a two run-ins, including one where I was soaked from the rain (HOT! not really) and a Saturday night where he joked about us “living the dream” by being young and hanging out at home on a weekend night.

I have a dream he could help me live out, rawr! *insert Barry White music*

He seems nice and very sweet and from the few times I’ve listened by his door when I’m leaving (not as creepy as it sounds), I don’t think there is a girl in his life either.

Maybe it’s time I head on over and ask if I can borrow a cup of sugar. I have a huge cup ready for him to fill. Hmm, that sounded gross.

So what do you think? Bring over a cup of sugar or wait for a few more chaste run ins at the elevator before I make a move? Or do I make a move?

Dream with me how this could work!

And being a single girl living in the city without a car, sometimes walking home after dark or bar time, you always have to be careful.

Friends and I have a strict system when we split from the group after dark. We text one another when we get home and make sure that if a street is dark, we walk down the middle of it (watching for cars) so we’re always in a well-lit area. And of course, if we feel unsafe, just get in a cab and make sure the driver he waits until you walk into your building.

This isn’t a perfect system but it works for us.

In Chicago, I always thought that “incidents” were more likely to happen after bar time, because, well my judgement has been clouded in beer and…more beer. But while reading the RedEye last week, it turns out that the early hours of the morning aren’t actually peak time for crime. The time with the highest amount of incidents is 9:00 – 10:00 p.m.

I re-read the story twice and I found that shocking and almost unnerving. The idea that I’m more vulnerable early in the evening really took me by surprise. So why is the Top Chef time such a hotbed for crime? According to the story, it says that people drink more in the evening and may reach an “optimal level of intoxication” early.

Hmm, drunk by 9 p.m.? Yes, I’ve been there but I still always feel more on guard when I’m leaving the bar, stumbling around, digging through my purse, giggling and making one last-ditch effort to make out with a guy.

But what I got overall from this article, always be on guard because there is no really “safe” time.

That means, being aware of your surroundings, walking in well-lit areas and not listening to your iPod or talking on the phone. Sadly though, I am guilty of these last two items on a regular basis. My boss even gave me pepper spray to carry around and I thought about taking a self defense class, but do they actually work in an emergency?

So do you have a system when you’re out with your friends? This applies to even non-major city people. In Wisconsin I definitely wasn’t safe when walking to my car. Fortunately (knock on wood) I’ve been lucky so far.

F*ck you scale: Wow, thank you everyone for the feedback to yesterday’s post. I’m glad I’m not the only one who hates the weigh in and there were a lot of good tips about getting back on track food and exercise-wise. I’ve started mixing up my gym routine so we’ll see how this goes!

But outside of that therapy-inducing experience, the one part I dread most about the doctor’s office is the weigh-in.

When it’s weigh-in time, I take off my shoes, jewelry and empty my pockets, because, well, that can add….five pounds maybe? I’m sure those keys in my pocket are two pounds on their own and my shoes could be made of solid lead. Maybe?

My doctor’s old scale used to be off by five pounds too so when the dreaded number came up, I could calm my nerves by saying, “well that’s at least five pounds more than I actually weigh so I’m fine!”

Not so much anymore. As I found out this weekend, the office got new scales and they are accurate, meaning no more five pound grace period.

Motherf*cker.

So after trying to argue my way out of the weigh-in, I get on the scale, take a deep breath, say “serenity now” and look down to see the number and then scream (and not in a happy way).

I have put on 10 pounds since the last time I was in the office. And to drive that knife further into my fat stomach, my doctor pulls up the screen to show my last few weigh ins and the depression washes over me even more.

Nope it’s not 10 pounds, it’s more like 12-15.

Holy sh*tballs.

To be honest, I wasn’t totally surprised by this. My diet lately hasn’t been great. But, I was still disgusted and angry at myself.

Then, seeing I was upset, she said something that completely took my mind off the fact that I’m getting fatter right in front of her.

“Okay, scooch down and put your feet in the stirrups.”

CONGRATULATIONS! You officially distracted me from the weigh-in.

I had a tough time deciding if I should post this story or not because it’s a little personal, I’m embarrassed by it and it makes me sad but I had to because ultimately it would have come out sooner or later.

So after spending part of the weekend in a total funk about this news, I’m trying to be positive and I’m determined to lose this weight again. It’s time to grab a diet and new exercise routine by the balls and really get back on track.

Why? Because I’m not happy with what I see when I look in the mirror and I want to change that, both mentally and physically.

Question time! Do you dread the regular doctor’s office weigh in? Or what part of the doctor’s office do you hate the most, or do you avoid it altogether?

Oh and yes, this was just coincidental with the whole baking post yesterday (thank you for all the sweet comments!) but now you know why I have to get this stuff out of my house.

Do you know what I’m doing right now? I’m sitting in my apartment on the couch with a big grin on my face, patting myself on the back. Why?

BECAUSE I BAKED THIS WEEKEND (and didn’t burn down my apartment).

And if you know me IRL, you know that this is an epic occasion.

I went through a minor nesting phase last weekend and got the baking bug and it would not go away until I made a pie, successfully, in my kitchen…with my own hands. And my choice was simple: apple pie. It’s my favorite kind of pie (since pumpkin is definitely out).

When I made my baking announcement, friends quizzed me to ensure that I meant I would physically prepare this myself and not buy it from the store pre-prepared. They know me too well, but I was not messing around.

So Saturday I went to the store and encountered a milestone: I bought a pie tin, flour and sugar. Another sign of true adulthood.

And with some help, I went through several apple pie recipes before settling on this one from Allrecipes.com. It seemed easy enough, which is the perfect way for me to start.

So here’s the end result, it makes me tear up because it’s so pretty:

And then because I was on such a role with the pie, I made red velvet cookies too (courtesy of RC) and those turned out awesome too:

Now because I’m a perfectionist, I already seen a few things I would change on the pie from a presentation standpoint, but I’m not going to let that take away from my accomplishments because I’m giving myself an A for effort!

Yeah I feel like pretty hot sh*t right now. And my book club and co-workers are going to love me because I cannot keep this stuff in my house (more on that tomorrow).

How was everyone else’s weekend? Has anyone else been bitten by the baking bug?

Feedback on Thursday’s post: I want to say a big thank you to everyone who commented on Thursday’s post about change. I was really blown away by the personal stories people shared and advice you all shared. Everyone made a lot of good points and I’m really glad I’m not the only one at this kind of crossroads. You guys are so awesome!

And right now I’m adapting to the change in seasons, but there is another change going on that I have a hard time accepting, which is a change in friendships.

That is the kind of change I hate the most because I resist it as much as possible. I create a bubble of “out of sight out of mind” around the issue, telling myself that everything is fine when it’s not. I’m growing apart from people close to me and the space between us keeps getting wider.

For me, losing friends or watching us grow apart is so difficult because my friends are part of my family. I don’t have family in Chicago that is readily available to take me in and let me hide out so I view my friend relationships as extensions of my family. These are the people who see so much of the good and bad, who celebrate with me and who support me when things are rough.

And lately, I’m noticing some friends drifting away, the get togethers becoming fewer and further between, the texts tapering off and suddenly when I do see them again, there is this ocean between us of so much to catch up on, wondering where to start but never fully catching up.

I know I haven’t been the best friend lately either. Stressed at work, coming off of a non-stop summer of traveling, working late and generally feeling like there are not enough hours in the day. And sometimes I feel bad that I’m not contributing 50/50 to the friendship but am also disappointed that they’re not meeting me half-way too. It’s a tough balance.

And when I’ve told people my fears about losing these people from my life, many of them shrug it off, saying, “well what can you do?” Right now, I don’t know the answer to that, but I do know that I don’t like where it’s at now and where it is going.

Change is inevitable and often difficult, but no matter how many times I go through it, losing that once close connection with friends is always the hardest. Why do things have to change?

How have you handled changes in friendships before? Are some easier than others or does it hurt more than a break up with a guy? I’m curious what your experiences have been.

This can come in the form of:

• Beer
• Comfort food
• Random men (kidding)
• Online shopping
• A combination of this entire list

And trust me, the beer + online shopping is the worst combination.

But sometimes when none of these things look appealing, I just like a little guy sex appeal. And now that fall is here and Chicago’s cute boys are forced to bundle up and layer clothing on to their delectable bodies, I can’t objectify them as easily on the street or bus. So I have to objectify men the old fashioned way, by watching movies with hot guys not wearing shirts.

Yes, that’s correct. Nowadays, I get my dose of man candy through movies.

And movies that have hot men walking around without their shirt (or less) on is fine with me.

But I should clarify, we’re talking hot no-shirt action like Daniel Craig in Casino Royale or Hugh Jackman in X-Men, not Will Ferrell or Seth Rogen.

Case in point, this weekend the Netflix gods were kind to me, sending me The Proposal and Fast and Furious. Yes, I voluntarily put the latter in my queue. Netflix knew I needed to see Ryan Reynold and have a mix bad dialogue, muscle cars and muscle men wearing wife beaters strained within in inch of that cotton’s life. L-u-c-k-y me.

Anyhow, on Saturday night, I put on my fuzzy slippers and cotton leggings and sat on the couch, devouring Chipotle and starting my Man Candy Marathon with The Proposal, with the idea and anticipation of shirtless Ryan Reynolds dancing in my head.

And when that moment came, which included gratuitous ab shots, with a sneak peek at his right butt cheek, it was everything I hoped it would be…and more. ScarJo, way to go girl, well done.

One movie that also should have been added to this Man Candy list is an oldie but a goodie, Top Gun. HELLO, the beach volleyball scene? Pre-crazy Tom Cruise? Yes! Let’s just say, I appreciate that scene SO much more as an adult :)

So that’s my story, when I’m feeling down, I objectify men in movies by picking fluffy movies where they take their shirt off. Now if they could just jump off the screen and unload my dishwasher and scrub my floors, I could die happy.

Did anyone else see The Proposal and enjoy the shirtless Ryan Reynolds scenes? What actors do you not mind seeing shirtless in the movies? Um, guys you can also list female actresses you appreciate too.

Anti-phone: Also, I’m glad to know I’m not the only one who has phone anxiety or has seen their social skills take a hit thanks to texting and Twitter. I still prefer to talk to people one-on-one but man, my phone skills have gone way down. As usual, I’m glad other bloggers are in the same boat :)

Blog note: It’s come to my attention again that several people are having trouble leaving comments because WP is telling them their comments are spam. First, thanks for letting me know and my designer and I are working on it now. It appears as though my spam filter is taking it’s job a little too seriously.

If you ever have trouble commenting or using anything on the site, feel free to email me anytime and let me know: myeverydayadventures@gmail.com.

You guys rock, thank you!

I think my old cell phone that barely allowed texting has faded into my memory bank, along with floppy disks and typewriters. Actually, I still keep that old phone…as a paperweight.

Anyhow because I’m so “wired” with technology, I’ve found that some of my social skills, like having a one-on-one in-person conversation or even talking on the phone seem like…so much work.

Why do we need to talk? We can DM or text in 140 characters.

But while I’m still good at talking to people in person (and often prefer that over email, especially on heavy email days), I am awful at talking on the phone.

Awful.

When you talk to me you’ll hear lots of “ums” and awkward pauses and probably hear me actually lose my train of thought. I even find myself needing to get up and move around when I’m on the phone because I get so distracted if I sit and just…talk.

What distracts me? Twitter, online shopping, email, IMs, TV, you name it and I get distracted and then the “ums” get started again. It’s like I have phone-induced ADD.

I’m not the only one who is bad at the phone. A friend can only handle talking on the phone for two minutes before he just stops. I kid you not, I check my call counter every time and usually around 1:45 he gets anxious and stuttery and then at 1:58 he says, “hey yeah want to meet up, I have to go.” And then he just hangs up. Boys.

He prefers to meet in person or converse by IM because he’s wittier that way. Me too.

Do you like talking on the phone or do you also get super distracted? I really need to be better at focusing on the phone with people but I just prefer to get together in person :) Let’s the conversation flow so much more naturally.

I wish I could regal you all with stories of an exciting, thrilling, action-packed weekend but really, I laid around and did a whole lotta nothing. And it was awesome. But it wasn’t totally boring.

Sweetest Day: Pile of crap?

To start, Saturday I woke up and heard that it was a national holiday…Sweetest Day!!!

*crickets chirping*

Sweetest Day is like a rash. You wake up one morning and notice is something different, then suddenly it starts spreading and realize you’re out of cortisone cream and can’t do anything but ignore it until it goes away. Yeah, I’m reaching a little bit but I think you get my point.

For as long as I can remember, Sweetest Day is for couples, almost like a mini-Valentine’s Day. But according to Wikipedia and the official Sweetest Day Web site, it’s a day to celebrate all the loved and special ones in your life.

I really like that explanation more, too bad it’s only really associated with couples, full of cards, flowers and candy. Kill me.

But is it really just another Hallmark holiday? I think so.

Wikipedia says the “holiday” is celebrated primarily in the Great Lakes area (which is where I grew up and grew to hate this holiday) but I think Neil Kramer said it best on Twitter Saturday:

“Happy Sweetest Day to everyone who lives in upper Midwest where it must have been invented to ease your way into freezing winter.”

Oh Neil. There is so much truth to that statement.

Therapy time at the salon

So as a single girl, how did I celebrate this “holiday?” It started with a trip to my bi-monthly therapy session at the salon for a haircut and color. My hair grows very quickly so I have to get it cut every other month and I always look forward to it for one reason: scalp massage.

A good scalp massage is better than a good workout and a mani/pedi because it kneads out all the stress and you feel completely different (and relaxed) when it’s done. Couple that with a complimentary glass of wine and paying for those services is so much easier :)

I love going to get my hair done because I can talk my stylist about anything and just have a sympathetic ear to whatever is bothering me friend-, work- or family-wise. Actually, it might be better than retail therapy (almost).

And once I had a sexy, cleaned up cut and color, I took that sassy bob downtown to go shopping…but came home empty-handed.

Seriously! That’s always my luck, whenever I want to go shopping, I can’t find anything. Oh well, another time. Next weekend is full operation gym shoes, shoe booty and fall sweater. No mercy!

How was everyone else’s weekend? Do you look forward to going to the salon? Or do you celebrate Sweetest Day? I’m always curious to hear who knows about it.

Also, thanks everyone, both pro- and anti-pumpkin, for weighing in on Thursday’s post. I’m glad to hear there are other non-pumpkin fan supporters out there and for those who do enjoy it, we will agree to disagree on friendly terms :)

Review blog update: Yes, I’ve been slacking on this one but I’m back with part two of the MAC Volcanic Ash experiment, this time, the Thermal Mask!

One even went so far as to infer that loving pumpkin foods and being awesome go hand-in-hand.

That is actually not always the case.

Why? Because I am awesome and I don’t like pumpkin-flavored foods.

That’s right. I’m NOT a fan of pumpkin.

*shock!* *gasp!*

This includes: pumpkin pie, pumpkin soup, pumpkin-flavored candy or muffins and…

Starbucks’ pumpkin spice latte.

Ohhhhhhhhhhh snap, no you didn’t, yes I did!!! *insert sassy finger wave*

I’ve never had a pumpkin spice latte and I don’t want to try one. I still go to Starbucks (which is a client) but I stick with my white hot chocolate (with skim) or mocha. There is something about the taste of pumpkin that just turns me off, same with the scent of pumpkin candles. Ick.

So how did I become anti-pumpkin? Well, as with many things, I blame my parents (I’ll work that out in therapy later) because we were never a big pumpkin-fan house. My parents don’t eat pumpkin pie and every year at Thanksgiving, there is only one piece eaten because the one person who does eat it takes his piece and then doesn’t take the whole pie home with him.

What is up with that?

Anyhow, I’ll take a lovely pumpkin and gourd assortment (with seasonal corn) any day in my apartment or at my desk and I love pumpkin seeds but I just don’t like the taste or smell of pumpkins.

Maybe digging out the pumpkin guts for all those years as a kid turned me off to it.

But…give me a chocolate mint drink or any mint-flavored desserts and I’m in heaven. I’m minty fresh, not pumpkin soft.

What about you? Are you pumpkin obsessed now that it’s fall? And do you indulge in all things pumpkin while it’s in season? Or are you anti-pumpkin, come on ladies, don’t leave me as the only non-pumpkin fan out there!

Hi everyone. It’s Angela from over at My Quiet Testimony today. Jessica was nice enough to let me post on her blog today, not that I need to be anonymous for this post, but simply for the fact that my own blog is not the best venue for this particular topic, since the people I am talking about might stumble upon it. Now onto my story.

I hate being brought into the middle of things, and I hate being pulled in multiple directions. But I also hate leaving people left out.

If you’ve read my blog for any amount of time, you might know of the situation between two friends of mine, Callie and Justine.* To make a very long story short, they cannot stand to be around each other, based on a situation about a boy from over a year ago.

Now, both of them are my friends. And, I like hanging out with both of them. Callie also happens to be one of my roommates this year, along with Sophie. Unfortunately, I can’t hang out with Callie and Justine at the same time because of their dislike for each other. Many times when we all make plans, Sophie and I either hang out with Justine, or with Callie. Or, Sophie will hang out with one and I’ll hang out with the other (this happens most often). When this is the case, I feel like I’m leaving one of them out. I don’t want to leave Callie out when we make plans with Justine, and vice-versa.

The thing is, sometimes I feel like Callie resents it when Sophie and I DO make plans to hang out with Justine, especially when Callie doesn’t have plans of her own. So sometimes I’ll decide to hang out with Callie instead so she doesn’t feel left out. And then I feel bad because I want to hang out with Sophie and Justine, too. I feel like I can’t please everyone.

I know both sides of the story of why they don’t get along. It happened over a year ago, and our other friends who know both sides think they should just try to make amends. We understand that they’ll probably never be friends again, but it’s stupid that they can’t leave what happened in the past. I wish that we could all make plans together and Sophie and I don’t feel like we have to watch what we say or feel on edge about what might happen.

I just hate feeling like I can only hang out with one and not the other (and kind of resenting it), and also feeling like I’m leaving someone out.

* Names have been changed.

For example, last night I meant to upload photos from my camera but didn’t because I was distracted by downloading Glee episodes on iTunes. I blame the change in seasons for that musical distraction.

But along with blaming the seasons for my absentmindedness, it has also caused some dormant “old lady” habits to surface too.

I started thinking about this after I saw a picture of my 14 year old goddaughter/cousin on Facebook going to her freshman year homecoming. She looked so beautiful and I choked up because I remember holding her as a baby and holding her hand as she learned to walk. And then I looked a picture of her full dress and said, “hmm that hem could be a little longer, below the knee Grace!”

Yes, that’s how sweet I am.

Now on to the other “old lady” habits I’ve adopted lately:

• Unable to stay awake past 10 p.m. on weeknights (and wanting to sleep until 10 a.m. the next morning)

• Commenting that high school girls’ senior photos look a little sluttier every year (my cousins showed me their yearbook)

• Inability to understand “kids” lingo. For example, a younger coworker said the word “baller” in a sentence to me and I have to think about what that meant

• Dislike of loud TVs or parties when I’m trying to go to sleep

• The attraction and longing for napping

• Exponential increase in bounce back time needed from drinking

Yeah, I need to get out more and be more reckless. Or I need to move to California where it’s sunny, warm and heavenly all the time. Or maybe it’s time for me to find a cul-de-sac in Florida where I can rest my back and swim by the pool. Sounds nice.

Have you noticed any “old lady” habits lately or a change in your moods because of the seasons? Or what would you like the blame the change in seasons for? Feel free to share, it’s not your fault!

Moving on, last week I watched the big Jim/Pam wedding episode (and the trailers obsessively) and cried, swooned and felt excessively happy. I mean, really, it was just too cute for words.

And it got me thinking about my wedding fantasy and reality. Yeah I know, talking about my wedding when I’m not even dating, that’s healthy and makes SO much sense :) So here we go!

Fantasy 1: Black-tie affair with flowers, soft lighting and everyone looking dapper in their best dress

Reality 1: My family isn’t very formal. Khaki’s are “dressed up” for us, so I am willing to bet that “black tie” is not something in their closet.

Fantasy 2: Garden wedding, with seersucker, pastels, foliage everywhere and a comfortable, natural setting

Reality 2: I hate bugs, fear bees more than rats and it makes the wedding really weather-dependent. And I’m not the kind of girl who likes 50/50 odds on my weather forecast.

And, I love the women in my family, but they are a little…vocal…and opinionated, which made me realize too that the wedding ideas would likely go through rounds of negotiation with me likely not being the winner at the end.

But then I watch The Office and see Jim/Pam run off and get married (unofficially) on at boat in front of Niagara Falls and I swoon and think, wow, that is really intimate and romantic. As much as I want my family there when the big event does happen, the idea of running off and it being just me and Mr. Jess, that seems pretty perfect too, in fantasy and I’m sure reality.

So what about you? Do you want a big, formal wedding or do you favor running off and having a huge party after? Or if you are married, did your wedding day turn out just as you wanted it or did you ever consider eloping?

Seriously! When I was in middle and high school I was crippingly shy. Sure, I was outgoing and talkative and loud with friends, but if you dropped me into a room where I didn’t know anyone, I would clam up and keep to myself. Conversation would be kept to idle chatter at a lunch or meeting table but as soon as we were released from the group, I felt uncomfortable asking people around me if they wanted to hang out. Likely because I have a fear of rejection.

Anyhow, as I got older, this shyness became less of an issue. When I lived in Germany and moved to Minnesota, I was very outgoing, going up to people I didn’t know, making conversation, making friends, maybe even inviting myself along because, well, I wasn’t going to take no for an answer. And I was going to make them like me!

But this weekend the shyness blanket wrapped itself around me again (probably with a Snuggie-like fit) and I found myself regressing at times to my previous ways, quiet, making small talk and feeling genuinely uncomfortable at times. The girl who walks into a party, introduces herself, gives a firm handshake and then gets a drink and works the room was somehow gone!

Usually when stuff like this happens, I confront it head on to help me get over it. I used to be terrified of public speaking and rather than let that control me, I joined the high school debate team and forced myself to deal with that fear (and kick some debate a** in the process.) And with my sometimes shyness, I try to force myself to break that too.

I was even trying to give myself pep talks like, “go out there, go make friends, go find someone to talk to, come on!” and I finally came around a little bit but d*mn, I was completely shocked by my behavior!

The thing I hated about being shy in middle/high school is that I always felt uncomfortable. Uncomfortable in how I looked, how I spoke, how I acted and I’m not like that anymore. Sure, some days are better than others, but I’m not the crazy insecure, uncomfortable, isolated person I was before. And having those feelings creep up again definitely knocked me off my game.

I even told a few friends I have a tendency to be shy in public and they laughed. It may be shocking, but it’s one of those hidden personality traits that I rarely let people see.

But trust me, I’m sure we all have that one trait that we keep under control but that slips out when we least expect it.

So some questions to ponder for tonight: are you shy or get bouts of shyness when you’re in a social or profession setting, if so, how do you get over it? Or what is your hidden personality trait that sneaks up on you when you least expect it?

Also, how was everyone’s weekend? I cannot wait to get back to watching college football on my couch this weekend, yes, I’m already thinking that far ahead.

My latest “child-like” behavior is that when I am hungry, you MUST feed me. Otherwise…well I don’t think you want to see the fussy bitchiness that ensues. Seriously, you don’t.Really, you don’t. A few people have and it’s really, not pretty.

I accept that I am not a patient person and after arguing with my dad this week about a dinner location, I realized he is just as impatient as me (guess that runs in the family).

For example, when I want to eat, I don’t want to wait, I want to eat right away or within 20-30 minutes (like my dad). Reservations are my best friend because I know when I will be eating and I can plan accordingly, but a lot of places in Chicago don’t take reservations and that…well throws me off my game. Plus, I’ve been known to say, “an hour wait?  But I’m hungry NOWWWWW.”

The only time I’ve waited an hour for a table in Chicago was at Xoco with TC. Fortunately, that time went by pretty quickly, due to great company, but when the food arrived, talking completely stopped. I think I had a Homer Simpson moment where I stammered out, “can’t….talk….eating.”

A friend once waited two hours for a restaurant to seat her and I told her she was insane. Because I think that is bananas. No place has food that is that good.

Two hours for food? Can you even enjoy it at that point or are you angrily cutting through meat muttering “motherf*cker I should be enjoying this and now I’m hungry, fussy and tired!”

And you know, once the fussiness starts, there is no going back. You can’t stop the fussiness, you can only appease it and hope it listens and doesn’t ruin your entire night.

And I know what you’re thinking, “well you can go have a drink or appetizer ahead of time at a bar nearby.” True, but by then, shouldn’t I just keep eating at this new place? Ha ha, counterpoint.

Or if I know the restaurant doesn’t take reservations and is notorious for a wait, I go at odd times. Hey, who doesn’t love a steak dinner at….5 p.m. on a Saturday. Yeah….that’s just what I’m craving.

This trait of mine is actually a little embarrassing to admit, but hey, why not put it out there. No shame in being honest.

Sigh.

Anyhow, am I the only one here who gets fussy when they don’t eat or if they get delayed in having a meal? Or, what is the longest you’ve ever waited for a table at a restaurant and was it worth it?

Thank you everyone for the really sweet words and ideas around my dating rut situation. And for those who volunteered to go speed dating. I’m serious. I’m emailing you about going!

Edit (9:50 p.m.): We’re still looking into the comment issue but for now it’s been fixed so feel free to comment!! If you have any more trouble, just email me at: myeverydayadventures@gmail.com and I’ll make it work!