3.  Decide if responding to the query is worth your time or if you should take a nap instead.

Here’s the secret. You don’t have a time management problem. You have a perfectionism problem. Perfectionism kills businesses. Here’s 3 reasons to convince you why good enough is better than perfect and what you can do to cure the disease of perfectionism.

1.  Perfectionism is an easy excuse for never getting things done.

You can’t publish that website because that graphic isn’t perfect yet. You can’t publish that eBook because you don’t have a proper editor. You can’t launch that business because the business plan isn’t finished. One of two things is going on here. Either you are afraid to fail, or you are afraid of the real work. Every time you put something new in to the world someone will hate it, maybe lots of people. That’s scary. You might even fail. Get over it. At least if you fail you can fail forward. If you never put it out there you can’t move at all. Guess what else? After you put something new out there the real work begins. You must write the content for that blog, you must marketing your eBook, you must actually build the business behind that useless business plan. Are you hiding from the real work? If you want to get things done, good enough is better than perfect.

Solution: Define what is good enough. Make a list of every feature, detail, bell and whistle that you want your idea to have. Sit down with your list in front of you and aim to cut it down by half. Yes, half. Make a very clear focused decision on exactly what qualifies as good enough. You can’t imagine how freeing it will feel and how much it will impact your timeline.

2. You can’t make any money if you don’t “ship it.”

If you are a business person you are developing your idea so that you can make money. You can create all of the revenue forecasts you want but until that product is out the door you can’t make any money. If you are waiting until your idea is “perfect” you are crippling your business financially. Lots of cash going out on development, nothing coming in from sales. If you want to make money, good enough is better than perfect.

Solution: Define your budget. You do have a budget? If you are boot-strapping you must have a time budget. “When I have worked this many hours I must stop – this must ship.”" If you are spending money it’s even more important you have a budget. “When I have spent this much money – this must ship.”

3. You can’t learn from your best source of information.

You are not your customer. You may have convinced yourself and your team that this feature, or chapter, or graphic, is an absolute “must have” – but when you get the product out the door your customers will happily tell you what they really want. I once launched a whole business piling on the benefits I knew my customers “must have” only to find that they weren’t interested in any of them. Imagine how much time and money I could have saved if I had known they were thrilled (and happy to pay for) just the bare bones product. You need to get the product out there so that you can learn from your best source of information. Your customers. If you want to create the idea your customers want, good enough is better than perfect.

Solution: Set a launch date and stick to it. Promote this date widely and with great fanfare. Now you are accountable. Your customers are looking forward to it and are ready and engaged to tell you what they think of it. This is a good thing. It means you will be able to give them the idea and let them create the final “perfect” product. Someone said, “if you aren’t embarrassed by your first release you have done it wrong.

Don’t kid yourself. There is no such thing as perfect. You know it, I know it, but most importantly our customers know it. As Seth would say… ship it! Get that idea, product, business out of the door and stop hiding behind perfect. It’s scary but believe me when I tell you that your “good enough” far exceeds 90% of the world’s “perfect”.

What are you holding to your standards of perfection? Tell us in the comments below your new definition of “good enough”.

Now truthfully there could be many reasons behind this (not so strange) phenomenon, but here’s one to consider…  are you holding your list captive?  Some marketers get so focused on building a list that they forget that the list contains actual real people.  Insecure business owners define their success by useless metrics – number of people on their list, number of Twitter followers, number of Facebook fans.  All of these numbers are useless if they don’t convert to revenue.  Why have a list if no one wants to be on it?  People on your list have, hopefully, given you permission to take some of their most precious commodity… time.  That’s a huge gift from a potential or existing customer.  Are you abusing it?  Did you get the gift in the first place or did you steal it?  If you love them set them free, if they come back, they are yours, if they don’t they were never yours in the first place.

If you have a non-complaining but non-responsive list, it’s possible that the people on that list quietly despise you.  Here’s a checklist to help you make sure you aren’t holding your list captive.

Did I give you permission to email me?

In The Bahamas once you give your email to someone, anyone, you end up on about a thousand lists.  The marketers there are relatively new to email marketing and haven’t yet grasped that all this does is make people angry.  If I didn’t ask to get an email from you I had better not see your business pop-up in my email inbox.  It’s called spam.  I will never buy from you.  Don’t rent or buy email lists, ever.  You must earn the permission to take up a person’s time.  Hey –  eCommerce owners – the fact that I bought something from you doesn’t give you permission to email me again about anything other than my order – unless I give you that permission.  Any don’t pre-check a box on the check-out page that says “I give you permission…” – that’s just trickery.

Do you have a double opt-in?

Most people will tell you that the double opt-in serves you.  Once a customer clicks on that permission link your emails are much less likely to end up in their spam folder.  I think the double opt-in serves my prospects/customers.  People do change their mind you know.  That double opt-in says to your customers, “just checking one more time, you are giving me permission now, you will get emails from me, are you absolutely sure?”

Do you have an unsubscribe button on every email?  It is easily available?

It’s the law in the United States.  Just in case you didn’t know that.  You are legally required to have a method of “unsubscribing” in every email you send (as well as your company name, address and contact information on every email).  Don’t make me hunt for the unsubscribe.  That just makes me frustrated… at you.  Some marketers will even put their unsubscribe button right at the top of the page with a reminder of how you got on their list.  You can test this yourself but personally I don’t like that placement.  I think it is so unexpected that people may even click it by accident.  I put the unsubscribe button exactly where people expect it – right at the bottom of the email immediately after the text.

Is it easy to unsubscribe?

If I don’t want to hear from you anymore I should be able to click once, maybe twice, and you should go away.  Please don’t make me jump through hoops in the hopes that I will give up. I will only despise you.  If you are asking me to send you an email to a different address, or reply with a different subject line, or put a secret code in the body of the reply email, you are only telling me that your company is too much of an amateur to use an email marketing service – which tells me I might not want to risk doing business with you.  If you would like to rise to the very top of my “despised” list please ask me to log in to my account with you to change my “email preferences”.  I have just told you what I prefer.  I prefer not to get email from you.  I didn’t even know I had an “account’ with you – and I can guarantee you I don’t remember the password.  You are effectively giving me a choice.  I can either take 15-30 minutes of my precious time figuring out how to get off of your list, or, I can forget it but then think horrible, terrible thoughts about your company every time you send me an email from this moment forward.  I will probably pick the latter.

Are you abusing my gift?

Two quick things to check here.  Are you emailing me too often and are you emailing me what you said you would.  So how often is too often?  It depends.  Did you set my expectations?  If I am signing up for a daily deal announcement I know I will get an email every day.  If I sign up for a weekly newsletter and you start sending me a daily email?  Too much.  Why not tell people when the sign-up with you, we will be emailing you (this content) on (this schedule).  Speaking of content, are you emailing me about the subject I am interested in.  Don’t send me information about your buddy’s motorcycle shop when I signed up for a course on gardening.

_____________________________

Successfully adding and keeping people on your list using any of the trickery in the checklist above can only hurt you.  The majority of people aren’t stupid.  They will either delete every email they get from you without even opening it, feel a stab of anger at you every time they see your business pop-up in their email box, or, worst of all, start complaining about you or your company to everyone they know.  It is much better to have a list of 10 people who love getting your emails than a list of 5,000 who don’t.

Do you have a story of being a list captive?  I’d love to hear it in the comments below…

Here’s your problem (and everyone has had this problem so don’t feel bad), you treat networking like gathering. You head off to a conference or event, walk around talking to people superficially collecting handfuls and handfuls of business cards (which aren’t even edible by the way), get home, put them all in a drawer and never look at them again. You may even feel satisfied because once in a while you need something, remember you met someone who could help you with that, fish their card out of the drawer and look what a good networker you are! Most of the time though all those cards, all those hours of gathering, are wasted – all those blueberries just rotting in the cave drawer.

The root of the problem is this – networking is about hunting, not gathering. Before you leave the cave to go out for a day or week of networking you must be very clear on exactly what it is that you would like to bring home… do you need a new wooly mammoth blanket? And what goes with blueberries?

Here’s how you network like a hunter (or at least as close as I could get with such a bizarre metaphor… cavemen, I ask you…?)

Pre-Identify

Before you even head out for the hunt you need to know what you are looking for. You don’t just go out there and shoot at everything so you end up with have no arrows left for the wooly mammoth Mrs. Caveman wants (you see I’m lost already – did cavemen even have arrows?)

Are you looking for a partner with a specific skill set? Are you looking for someone to help you spread the word about a new product? Are you looking for a mentor that you can turn to who has success in a particular industry? You must be very specific about exactly what you want to bring home. The best networker/hunter I ever met was a matchmaker (a fantastic lady). She went to every event with extremely specific requirements for who she wanted to meet as matches for her clients – and she always walked away successful.

Look at the list of speakers – do any of those folks fit your criteria? Get on to Twitter and use the event hashtag to strike up conversations with as many folks as possible and then look them up online. Do you any of those folks fit your criteria? Many events will have a Facebook page or sometimes a list of attendees on their website – you know what to do. Before you leave for any networking opportunity you should have a list of at least three specific individuals that you would like to make contact with and why.

Choose Your Weapon

Choose the right weapon. I wouldn’t imagine you could bring down a wooly mammoth with just a superficial wound from an arrow, just as you can’t establish a relationship with a superficial conversation. (OK I’m really losing the metaphor here. Disclaimer… I am not asking you to wound or slay your networking targets).

In this case, your weapon is something of huge value you can offer to your target. The best way to make an instant connection with someone is to offer them something of value. Research each person on your pre-identified list and figure out what problems they may have that you could help solve. When you meet someone who is not on your pre-identified list, but who meets your pre-identified criteria, focus exclusively on figuring out what value you could bring to their lives/business.

Plan Your Follow-Up

Always establish a follow-up plan. How does your target like to communicate – Twitter, Facebook, Phone, In-Person? Tell your target exactly when and how you will follow up with them and then do it. Write on the back of the card that you give them, “I will follow up with you on ______ via _______ so that we can further discuss (thing of value)”. I’ll bet you that your card stays on the cave table and doesn’t go in the cave drawer with the rest of the blueberries (see how I did that? Didn’t think I could get a metaphor in there did you?)

Don’t Underestimate Chance

So say you are out hunting for the wooly mammoth and a gorgeous, yummy looking saber tooth tiger struts by. Do you ignore it? I don’t think so. It’s an easy shot and Mrs. Caveman loves tiger meat. When you are out hunting/networking you should likewise leave yourself open to opportunity. Just because the person you have found yourself in conversation with doesn’t meet your pre-identified criteria – don’t walk away. Serendipity is a powerful force and you never know who might walk across your path.

So get out there and network like a cavemen. Pre-identify exactly who you would like to meet and why. Figure out what you have to offer your networking targets so that you can establish an instant mutually beneficial relationship. Have a clear and precise follow-up plan. Leave yourself open to unexpected connections. Don’t go home from an event with only a drawer full of blueberries to show for it.

Do you have any additional networking tips to add? Or any advice on how I could improve my caveman analogy? Please add it to the comments below.

In a recent episode, Freddy Rumsen (a senior copy writer) is forced to take a leave of absence. He appears to take it well and engages on a last testosterone fueled wild night with Don and Roger. At the end of the evening, as he is being deposited safely in to a cab he desparately grabs Don Draper by the arm and with his lower lip quivering says, “If I don’t go in to that office everyday, who am I?”

I have found myself in the Miami airport quite a lot lately. I am morbidly mesmerized by the woman in their superhero gear – dressed in expensive business suits, chatting on their iPhones, their laptops open in front of them, Coach bags sitting at their feet, Prada sunglasses perched on their perfectly coiffed heads. They are always surrounded by other women, exactly the same. Oh I know who they are, I used to be one. Although I love what I do and who am I now (especially now I’m not one of them) I always feel a pang of envy in my chest when one of them gracefully steps her Jimmy Choos over my flip-flopped feet. The question is… Why?

Instant Identity.

These are easily recognized characters: a copywriter for one of the top ad companies on Madison Avenue, a business woman who is so important she needs to travel the world and so successful she can exhibit her superhero gear for all to see. When you are ensconced in the cocoon of an easily recognized character you are safe – people know who you are, people respect you… you know who you are.

Or do you?

The real reason Freddy Rumsen is forced to leave the agency is because he is slowly drinking himself to death. Filling the hole that should contain personal fulfillment and self-awareness with so much scotch he doesn’t even realize when he pees his pants. If that’s who he his I would guess it’s not who he wants to be.

Likewise, although a pang of envy sometimes gives me pause, I know that I couldn’t be one of those woman again.

The safety, respect and admiration that come with instant identity are a siren song. They are incredibly alluring but be tempted by them and you may end up finding out that they don’t really exist. You may find yourself smashed and shipwrecked on the rocks.

Freddy Rumsen has just been given a gift. A chance to figure out who he really is. It’s scary out there without a superhero costume. But trust me, even though I don’t look like I’m flying in my tatty shorts and battered flip-flops… I am.

So if you have already crashed on the rocks please ask yourself…who are you? If I threw away your superhero costume, your job, your instant identity, if I told you that you really could be whoever you wanted to be… who would you be?

It actually continues on with the theme of practicing Largesse – one of the tenets of our Code Of Chivalry. If Galahads strive to live by the Code Of Chivalry they can make a difference in the world.

So a tip to add to the ways to practice largesse – “see the world through eyes of love and not through eyes of judgement.” (Christine Hassler)

How?

Be generous in your thinking and let that thinking inform your actions.  Be aware that you will never understand fully what is going on in someone else’s life.

Did another person decline your request for help in a way that made you feel bad?  Perhaps they have just had the busiest most hectic week of their life… don’t judge.

Does it seem as though a friend’s business is growing leaps and bounds ahead of yours?  Perhaps they ran in to a streak of luck, or got some unexpected funding… don’t judge.

Did a guy you know just leave his wife suddenly?  Perhaps they have been problems for years that he has been trying to work on… don’t judge.

Be the person who smiles at that nasty rejection, cheers at a friend’s success, reaches out to a friend going through a difficult situation.  No judgement -just love.  As Christine says, loving yourself is vital and you will love yourself more when you practice largesse.

I was thrilled today when I came across this article: Naming Your Dreams.  As part of your True Self Profile we ask you to name your goals for the future.  We guide you through the steps to make them SMART goals and we give you some fun and useful tools to declare them and manage them through the My True Self Profile feature in Camelot.  We forgot something.  We forgot to tell you to name them.  Sure you have named them you have written them down but you have given them real Galahad worthy kick-ass names.  As Betsy from Married With Luggage says…

“If you can give your goal a name, you make it easier to manage yourself as well as for others to step in and help, offer guidance, and make it better or easier than you could on your own.”

I think there is something else too though.  When you name your goal you make it more than a goal, you make it an adventure.  And that’s what being a Galahad is all about.

So I’ll start.  Here are my “goals”

• Build a community of generous, courageous financially successful women and pump fuel in to the success of women entrepreneurs worldwide. Have 1,000 Galahads by 2015.
• Write a romance novel by end of 2012, get it published by 2014.
• Be a speaker at 5 major conferences during 2013/2014
• Help my personal coaching clients generate $10M in annual revenue combined in 2013

And here are my adventures…

• The Gradual Gathering Of The Kick-Ass Troops
• Year Of Steam
• The Stand, Share, Change Project
• Delivering Freedom in 2013

Share your named adventures with other kick-ass women in the comments below

The values embodied in The Code are the values that must be completely embedded in the thoughts and actions of all Galahads – in business and in life. When all of our members are truly living The Code we will be well on our way to achieving our mission of creating a community of generous, powerful, self-fulfilled and financially successful entrepreneurs.

Want to really make sure you are living the code?  Let’s review the meaning of one of the tenets, and see how you can choose to incorporate the Code Of Chivalry in your life and business.

Largesse – Give, give, give. Be as generous to other Galahads as your resources allow. What ever you put forth will come back to you ten-fold.

Kahlil Gibrahn said ”Generosity is not giving me that which I need more than you do, but it is giving me that which you need more than I do.”  It has been proven in many a study that generosity is good for both your health and your pocket – but mostly it benefits those around you – and that’s what being a kick-ass woman is about.  Erica used the best description of largesse in one of our extensive conversations about what we would like the Code Of Chivalry to represent.  She called it, “intentional generosity”.  So how can you be intentionally generous?

Here are 5 practical ways to practice Largesse.  See if you can apply one action a day for every day next week…

Give Time

All of us are busy.  I am sure that every Gal reading this has used the phrase, “there aren’t enough hours in the day”.  But the question is, what are you using those hours for?  Time is our most precious commodity.  To give away our time is one of the most generous donations we can make in service of the universe. Can you look back on every day and say you used every minute of your time wisely?  I can’t.  But if I could look back on every day and say to myself that I gave away some of that precious time for a good cause, I could feel good about that day regardless of what I managed to accomplish.  Here are some time giving ideas.  See if you can give time every day.

• Pick up groceries for an elderly neighbor while you are shopping for yours.
• Pick up the phone when a friend is calling (even when you think you couldn’t possibly spare a minute) and spend the time listening.
• Spend an hour reviewing a colleagues work for her – providing well-though out attentive feedback.
• Sacrifice the gym one morning and surprise your family with a fully-cooked family breakfast.

Give Talents

Is there something that you have a particular talent for that is a frustration for others?  Most of the time it’s something you enjoy anyway.  For example I love coaching.  Love it.  It gives me real pleasure sharing my talents so I always carry a pro-bono client in my agenda.  Every single one of you has a talent or talents that would tremendously benefit your friends, family or other Galahads.  Here are some ideas.

• Good at Graphic Design?  Offer to clean up a logo for another business owner.
• Talent for writing?  Reach out to someone who may need the support of a strong editor for a short e-book or article.
• How about non-business activities?  Are you a killer baker?  Offer to do the birthday cake for a classmate of one of your kids.

Give Inspiration

Generosity doesn’t have to take any time at all.  Sometimes it is as simple as saying the right words at the right time.  When was the last time you told a waiter how impressed you were with their service.  Or complimented a co-worker on a project.  It take just a few minutes to give inspiration here are some phrases you might try working in to your daily vocabulary.

• You are really great at…
• I love how you…
• It really makes me feel great when you…
• You really move people when you…

Give Credit

And I don’t mean credit where credit is due.  That’s a given.  How about just acknowledging even the smallest contributions.  You don’t need a list for this one – it’s easy to practice.  Every time someone compliments you on anything you can reply with, “Yes but I couldn’t have done it without (insert name and contribution)”.  No Galahad accomplishes anything in a vacuum and practicing the tenant of largesse by giving credit also helps you practice gratitude more frequently.  Can’t go wrong there.

Give Money

The smallest amount can make a massive difference.  With Kiva, for only $25 you can contribute to a loan for woman entrepreneur in a developing country.  Even better?  They pay it back and you can loan it again and again.  Here are some ideas for giving money where you know it will be put to good use.

• Give to family.  Create an Auntie account for your nieces and nephews and start contributing college spending money.
• Give to Entrepreneurs.  Go to Kiva above or visit Kickstarter for great ways to donate to innovation and entrepreneurship.
• Donate to a reputable charitable organization.  Here’s an article with some great tips on checking out a charity prior to donating.

Intentional generosity is how kick-ass women ensure that they carry other women along with them on their adventures… and we all know we need company on our quests.

How do you practice largesse?

*Photo by Ed Yourdon

I know that every single one of you has heard the term, “live within your means”.  Does it make you shiver in your booties?  Or shiver me timbers? Forget that…I don’t know what either of those questions mean.

But, the point is… there is only one way to get debt-free and stay debt free, and that is to spend less than you earn.  It sounds easy – but say those words to anyone and you will encounter extreme resistance.  The resistance comes from the fact that as soon as you think “live within your means” you stop thinking about the joys and advantages (especially for an entrepreneur) of being debt free and start thinking about all of the things that you will need to give up.  But do you really know what those things are?  Really?

Let’s just take it one step by simple step.  In Step 1 the only thing you need to do is face the music.  And eventually you will realize that whatever you find out is really not as terrible as you think.  Oh it will be hard, and it will life-changing, it just won’t be terrible.

So time to face the music.  It’s the hardest step.  You will resist with every fiber of your being.

Let’s start with a story about a client of mine  – we’ll call her Liz.

Once upon a time, a smart, competent, capable girl named Liz realized she was in financial trouble.  It actually surprised her.  She had always been so responsible with money and had never had any problems in the past.  But now with a family (including two children), two cars, day-care, a mortgage, etc… she could never keep up.  Even though she and her husband earned more than twice the national average wage, she still worried about getting her bills paid every month and had started to rack-up some huge credit card bills.  It was a never-ending spiral.

Feeling at a loss she decided to call LM for advice.  Surely she could give her the secret to getting out of the mess she was in.  This is what LM told her to do…

Step 1 – Face The Music

Mind your money.  And that means every penny.  Write down every single monthly payment as well as every cash penny you spend and every credit card charge for an entire month.  At the end of the month, categorize them - Utilities, Mortgage, Auto, Daycare, Groceries (ones that you actually eat…at a meal…at the table).  You know that cheeky little “miscellaneous” category?  The one that tends to hide all multitude of sins?  Rename it – call it “Discretionary Spending”.  And please…be honest.  Ice-cream for the kids at the mall isn’t part of your “childcare” category, a trendy new diaper bag isn’t either.  But maybe your kids aren’t your Achille’s Heel.  Tell your husband that a leather steering wheel cover doesn’t count as part of the “auto” category – and take-out for lunch every day at work can’t count under “groceries”.  Tell yourself that the fifth shade of lipstick in your quest to find the perfect red does not count as “personal care”.

Liz listened closely to LM, agreed with her, committed to Step 1 and then she… did nothing.  When Liz called LM to commiserate with her the following week, LM listened sympathetically and then asked her how Step 1 was going.

“Oh well I don’t have to do that – I already know all of our bills and I already know that we just don’t even have enough to get through the month”

Well, LM and Liz were actually pretty close.  LM had a very good idea what Liz’s expenses were – and when she added them quickly in her head, she know that her real expenses accounted for a little more than half of her income.

LM still talks to Liz all the time, and frequently about money.  But that first conversation was more than 10 years ago.

_________________________

That really is Step 1 by the way.  And it really is that simple. But it’s not easy.

Here’s the reason that you must do Step 1, as well as the reason that Liz won’t.

Getting out of debt and living below your means is tough.  It requires that you take a long hard look at the lifestyle that you can actually, realistically afford – and you may not like it.  If Liz were to truly do step 1 and look the “Discretionary Spending” category in the face, then she would have no more excuses.  She would have to change her spending habits, which she believes would be inconvenient, uncomfortable and cramp her style.   She would have to really, truly want to get out of debt.  I guess she doesn’t really and truly want to… do you?

Don’t worry, Step 2 will soften the blow a bit.  Facing the music isn’t about figuring out all of the things you will have to live without.  You face the music so that you have real, honest data to make informed decisions about your spending priorities.  Liz’s primary focus is her kids, she doesn’t want them to miss out – so all she has to do is make her kids the priority over her lipstick.  Until her priorities change.  The priority for my family is travel.  We do without “stuff” so that we have the cash to fund our travel bug.

You really only need a pen and paper to do this exercise properly, but if you want to get fancy there are some apps like Expensify that make the task easier to track and manage once you get the numbers. My daughter is responsible for tracking our spending while we travel so she uses Receipts Pro on the iPad since she always has that with her.  But having the right tools shouldn’t hold you up.

Just grab a notebook and start TODAY.