Full Diapers & Even Fuller Hearts

My other blog

2020-10-01T01:22:00.008-06:00

I have a lot of catching up to do! Oh man. But first, a couple months ago I started an “anonymous” public spiritual Instagram account. I only told three people about it (besides Nate), my parents, and a really good friend who totally understood this desire and encouraged me to do it. I’ve posted almost every day!

A month in, I finally told a few more people. It’s not about followers or likes at all (haha not many of those anyway!) I’m trying to stay totally separated and indifferent from that. It’s not about self gratification, it’s about Him. It’s simply about being a voice of good out there and practicing articulating my thoughts & faith as I read the Come Follow Me studies each week. Also, a couple weeks ago I listened to the All In podcast by LDS Living, the episode with Randal Wright where he talks about a 3 word journal and learning lessons from every day life, and I was like- this!!! This is what I’ve been wanting to do! It reminded me of the promptings I’d been getting about writing more and not missing what’s in front of me! So inspirational.

Anyway ... somehow I keep posting almost every day. It’s harder than it seems & sometimes it takes me SO LONG to formulate my thoughts!! I thought I’d get faster at posts, but it still takes me a good while to say exactly what I want to say (and the word count limit on Instagram makes it tricky!! But forces me to not ramble, which is good!) But this whole thing has gotten me to ponder SO much every day, study different topics, and just be more spiritually-minded in general. Instagram seems silly sometimes and I have my pros and cons about it- BUT posting to an account keeps me committed and accountable somehow, and the posts just keep coming- like, it’s working this way for me. And I have this blog here to help me remember and write experiences that come to mind when I’m reading the scriptures.

Anyway, I started copying and pasting those Instagram posts to another blog of mine I started in April with these same intentions in mind, but never took off. Turns out I’m on my phone more, so the Instagram thing made me do it better. As I posted more, I realized I didn’t want everything on Instagram, I wanted a blog format as well to keep my posts more safely recorded and saved and searchable (for myself to keep track of past posts). Anyway, it’s

www.writeattheheart.blogspot.com

My Instagram is @write.at.the.heart

And all the photos are mine! There are maybe a couple that Nate’s taken, and even one or two from Jenna! I feel like I have to clarify the photos are all mine cause I’ve had a couple people say they like them & think I’m finding them on the internet, haha. Nope! Just photos I’ve taken throughout my life from different places. 😊 Since I love taking pictures, that part is fun as well.

Okay that’s it! I’ll catch up one day!

Let's just finish off June

2020-08-30T17:41:00.002-06:00

HIGHLIGHTS OF JUNE (Since the pictures I'm sure are uploaded totally out of order! If you think I'm not even TRYING to really blog anymore, you'd be right...here are highlights, mostly pulling from my Instagram posts)

George Floyd: Wow well I won't get into politics on here, BUT the George Floyd situation sure brought awareness to the world. No matter how you look at it, what happened to him was horrifying. For a few days I was in a dark place, so overwhelmed and heavy, thinking about racism, watching the media, hearing about riots... but there's a balance between staying informed and letting it consume you, and the negativity was closing in. I backed away for a bit and while I don't want to ignore what's going on (still going on. SO MUCH GOING ON! Hello, election year and 2020 in general) I have to step back.

-Family bike rides, family soccer, playing catch (ordered mitts for everyone cause we played catch once, and then played catch probably only one more time since then, haha), hikes (LOOOOOVE hiking here! The outdoors in OH is MY FAVE!), stunning sunsets (OKAY AND THE SUNSETS!), kite flying

-Said goodbye to the Merrills... nooo!!! I know we were meant to cross paths with them. We love their family so much, they made the move here so much easier. What a blessing. Jenae is positive, inspiring, so full of faith, genuine, encouraging. We will definitely stay in touch. Before they left, we had a couple of get togethers, including a "field day" because the kids didn't have one for the last day of school.

-Went to Carriage Hill and saw some gorgeous horses,

-Ella turned EIGHT!!!! And that day playgrounds opened up again, YAY! So we may have hit 3... Jenna spoiled Ella with a "spa" in the basement, giving her a facial, painting her nails, doing her hair, and even putting some makeup on her, which of course Ella LOVED. Then we had a picnic with Chick-Fil-A, went on a family bike ride and baseball. I LOVE Ella's enthusiasm, her stubbornness, I mean, her extreme determination, haha, her lovable personality, her big spirit, the way she tests, I mean, teaches me so much. :) She is a special girl, a sweet, good girl, a girl who surprises me at times with her maturity and view of the world, a girl full of life and fun and brightness, a girl I cannot imagine my life without! She loves sharing her birthday with Uncle Bry, and loves singing to him in heaven.

-Went strawberry picking at Stokes Berry Farm! It is THE thing to do cause it was PACKED, but luckily we still managed to find a few berries. That promptly got eaten, haha.

-Surprised the kids with a Kona Ice delivery to our house. Yay snow cones!

-Kaitlyn and Ella played "olden days" for a couple days, hilarious!

-Felt bad about the kids' social lives in June compared to what they had in UT... don't worry, by August it's gotten better.

-Played in the creek at Magee's Park, kids found a dead crawdad. Logan could hardly put the 7th Harry Potter down. YESSS!

-Got caught up on America Ninja Warrior, so when we went to Spicer Park, the kids had fun pretending to be ninja warriors.

-FIREFLIES!!!! We've been SOOOO excited seeing them during the summer nights!! The kids caught a few (and always released them, we're not firefly murderers here)

-Kaitlyn was invited to Caesar Creek for a bday party and now we love Caesar Creek (more like a lake)

-Went with our awesome friends the Porters to visit Serpent Mound, a 1000 foot long effigy mound in the form of a snake built by ancient American Indians. So cool!! Then we drove to Seip mound, and the Hopewell Culture National Historical Park, where there are 23 burial mounds (it's called Mound City), built around 2000 years ago by the Hopewell culture, with an estimated 120 people buried in them. So fascinating!

-Father's Day- I'll be laughing at the banner Logan, Kaitlyn, and Ella made for Nate for a LONG TIME! (It says "Happy F-Day") The kids showered Nate with love! Jenna even made him his FAVORITE dessert that his mom makes, homemade eclairs! I helped a bit, but they turned out AMAZING! Nate was SOOO surprised and thrilled, so fun. Also so thankful for my dad and father-in-law!

-Eight mile bike ride with the fam, saw deer, bunnies, and cardinals, and one small crash, whoops. Always some whining, but it's getting better! And you know who never complains? Jackson, with his tiny bike and little legs.

-Clay masks with the girls, grabbing frogs and lost baby birds in our yard.

-Cox Arboretum for a Sunday stroll! The kids were thrilled at all the turtles in the ponds!

-Fun in the backyard pool, home workouts... made the kids do some Body Combat a few times. Jenna is still working out with me! We finished Fierce at Home (sweat app) and started the Power with Kelsey Wells on the Sweat app. Lovin it.

-Kids got way into painting on canvases and did a great job! Lovin Logan's Harry Potter paintings.

Summer begins, Mother's Day, Memorial Day, More Hikes, Nate's birthday, and a Night Scare

2020-06-14T14:56:00.003-06:00

Okay, these pictures all uploaded in a weird order, and instead of painstakingly trying to fix it, I'm not gonna! SOO I'll just jump back and forth between pictures in this quick, or not so quick, catch-up post!

Why did I take this cute picture of Ella and not-so-flattering picture of me? To remember a strange night I had. The night before, Ella was complaining about a "lump" in the back of her mouth, in the space behind where her palate expander wraps around her back tooth. It was weirdly inflamed and swollen looking. I gave her medicine because she said it hurt so much. Then she woke up crying in the middle of the night a couple times and the second time was acting so strangely I pulled her into bed with me and Nate. I was worried about her. I couldn't tell if she had a nightmare (in the morning she told us she had a dream that she was drowning), if her mouth just hurt, or what the deal was, but I was very unsettled. She didn't seem herself, and it was alarming to me and Nate. I had trouble sleeping the rest of the night, waking up once in awhile and checking to see that Ella was okay (i.e. breathing!!). As I tried to sleep, I just had this fear creep in, and just had these awful thoughts of something happening to Ella. I began to think all sorts of things. I thought about Ella, how she can challenge me so much, how she can be so stubborn and difficult and sometimes I just don't know how to deal with her. That little temper of hers can flare! But then I thought about how much she teaches me and how incredible she is and how truly special she is. I wondered if I was being the best mom I could be for her and how I would do absolutely anything for her. I thought about how life could quickly change in a second. I wondered if I was truly living in the moment, being present. I wondered if I was taking things for granted. I wondered if my priorities were straight. And in those moments of half-asleep/half-awake thoughts, some irrational, some not, I just desperately prayed for everything to be okay. It was a weird night, and when I woke up and talked to Nate, he had a very similar experience, which was interesting. She really scared us! So when I saw she was okay, and felt the clarity and comfort that morning brings, the night before seemed like a strange blur. But at the same time, I didn't want to forget it. It reminded me how much this little girl means to me. How much ALL my kids mean to me, and how no matter what happens tomorrow, I will be the best I can be for them and remember what's really important. And that's why I took this picture. Also- I did take her to the orthodontist, who said the lump was not anything to worry about, just inflamed gums from the expander, and it has since shrunk, yay.

We went to John Bryan State Park, and it was STUNNING!!!! It was SO beautiful!!!! We were enveloped in a sea of green, and I swear, some parts of our hike it felt like we weren't in Ohio, but were in some South American country. It actually reminded me of the Jungle Cruise ride at Disneyland. No, we didn't see any exotic animals, haha, but I don't know, it just felt like we were deep in the middle of somewhere far away. Nature just brings me so much peace and joy!!! Nate and I declared ourselves Nature Gushers. We gush about every new place we go, WE LOVE IT! I love that he gushes with me. Needless to say, we both take a ton of pictures as well, cause, Nature Gushers. So like I said, they're not all in order and they're scattered throughout this post, but oh well.

We laughed at Jackson in the beginning because he was dressed like we were about to go see lights at Temple Square, including his Rudolph hat. But then we weren't laughing when we got out of the car and it was FREEZING!!! Haha.

Just a goose taking a ride down the river.

There will be more of the hike later...

For now, here are silly pictures of the kids.

Ummm, not in order, here is Mother's Day!!! Nate made me a delicious breakfast in bed, and here are the kids eating it, too.

Jackson also made me a special snack at his "restaurant" (his special snack was leftover breakfast, haha) and he set up a "TV" aka his camera with a video of himself playing. It was too cute!

Mother's Day flowers, including some I delivered to my ministering sisters.

I interrupt this programming about Mother's Day to bring you more pictures from John Bryan State Park!!

Nate taking pictures of me taking pictures with my nice camera of the wildflowers.

More of the cave.

OHHH back to Mother's Day! I present to you, The Breakfast. Nate always does amazing.

An awkward photo to post on a blog of me in bed in my robe, but it's my blog, ;) I love the tradition of them all coming in to give me breakfast singing "Happy Mother's Day To You" with all their cards and cute homemade gifts. I love being their mama.

Jenna painted me a picture of a horse (She knows I love them!) with only her fingerprints. So awesome!

They made me a banner.

Then I actually had to teach Relief Society via Zoom that day, so Nate took this of the kids in the basement, warning them THEY HAD TO BE QUIET!!!! The lesson went well, I think! And I gave the link to my mom so she was there for my lesson too!! Thank you, mom!!!! Funny enough, that day we got word that we were to stop doing Zoom church lessons, which is kinda sad cause I've loved getting to know the sisters through Zoom, but I understand it's a family day, too, and for every family to be in charge of their own Sabbath.

Then after my lesson, the kids all made me a special lunch with a menu and everything.

They really are the sweetest kids ever. They're not perfect, and I of course am FAR from perfect, but it really did feel like just the best Mother's Day ever.

And Nate took this picture one morning after I was showing the kids hilarious videos from The Johnson Files on Instagram- oh my heck, he makes me laugh so hard. Especially his "Mom, watch!" series.

And happy Mother's Day to my amazing mother!!! I miss her so much! We have had the tradition of taking a picture of her with the kids every Mother's Day since 2010, and we missed it this year! But here are the last few years for fun! The kids' poses and faces are so funny to me! Pictures are hard. ;)

And my wonderful mother-in-law!!!! We love you! Here are some past pictures of her!

OH YEAH! The last day of school!!!! It was May 15th. We did it!!! Made it through homeschool!! which wasn't too bad at all, actually. So, my friend Ashley had a fun idea. Since the tradition for the last couple years has been to throw water balloons/water guns to start a water fight with the kids as they walk home from their last day of school, she said we should all surprise our kids with a water fight and video it and share it with each other so she could make a video out of it. So Nate and I gathered the kids on the patio and as I asked them questions about the last day of school, Nate started pelting them with these water balls I got off Amazon. They LOVED it and we had a fun little water fight with the kids. I'm too lazy to upload the video to YouTube so I can post it, but it was fun. :)

Pre-waterfight.

Another hike, just on a trail near our house. It was sprinkling rain, so we did it quickly!

Finally got Nate a ROAD BIKE!!!! YAY!!!!!! It came right around his birthday, so happy bday to him! I got him everything he needs to be a TRUE cyclist- helmet (OF COURSE), gloves, jersey, padded shorts, odometer, bike light... no clipless pedals yet, but maybe down the road. So far he LOVES his bike and biking!! I have been waiting for this!!! I do miss my girl biker gang and Antelope Island rides, but the bike paths here are gorgeous and go on forever and ever, it is so much fun! Look, he is even taking selfies while riding, I have taught him well.

So now family bike rides are a thing! My dream come true!!! Our first ride was to a pond (there are lots of ponds here, like LOTS of ponds) and the sun was just setting so it was gorgeous. The kids did great! We went 5 miles.

This was ANOTHER hike, this time to .... dang I forgot the name of the waterfall... I'll fill it in later. But to a gorgeous waterfall. It was HOT this day though, and very humid, so the kids whined a lot, let's be honest.

Memorial Day! Normally our tradition is to go see graves of loved ones with our families, so I thought it would be cool to look on Family Search and find relatives buried here! We found some! Okay, like 7th and 8th cousins... but still!! It was fun to find their graves and try to learn about them and "remember" those who have gone before.

Jenna painted these two pictures for Mother's Day, one for Nate's mom, of Bry, and one for my mom, of running shoes. I love her passion for art lately.

Another bike ride, another pond.

The girls all laughing at some funny video. Boy, the kids have had to get closer together, because they're all each other has! It's been fun to see. Although my heart does ache for them a bit, not being able to hang out with their friends during the summertime. But more on that in the next post maybe.

Oh look, more Mother's Day!!! Cute letters from the kids.

Went through a bit of a puzzle phase where they were covering the kitchen table.

Ella was invited to a "bike parade" birthday party for a little boy in the ward her age! It was so fun to socialize and see her around other kids! Social distancing has been getting REAL OLD.

Back to the last day of school!!!! We got the kids a special dinner- STEAK AND RIBS from Texas Road House! They loved it!

Love walks in our neighborhood. We have done WAY more walks and bike rides through the neighborhood than we ever did in Utah. Funny how new surroundings bring about new habits and experiences.

Last day of school ONCE AGAIN- we set up the tent in the living room so they could "camp" for a couple days. They thought it was cool. :)

A couple more pictures from a hike... such a pain that these are out of order!

Jackson wanted me to take a picture of his creation.

Nate had a birthday, shout hooray!! He loves nothing more than hanging out with family with good food and a good movie!! So we did just that. We love him so much!!!!! He is the best!!!

More bike riding pictures from my perspective now. :)

Set up the inflatable pool, and they've had some fun days playing in it.