The Happy Geek

It's not a Joke. I Repeat, NOT a Joke. I Blogged

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Fri, 01 Apr 2011 12:29:00 +0000

1. My dad reminded me that my blog has not been updated in three weeks. To which I replied that no, I have not written much but since March 3rd I have vacuumed my house at least 12 times, cleaned the bathrooms every second day and basically followed behind my kids with a broom and scrub bottle.

2. No, the house has not yet sold. Why do you ask?

3. Spring finally got the memo and showed up in these parts. Yesterday we got up to 7C in the sun. Which means that pretty much everyone is in shorts and the hoochie momma tops are out in full force. After 20 minutes in Walmart I wanted to go and scrub out my eyes with bleach. Parkas can be a blessing in disguise sometimes.

4. I have discovered a new recipe site. Soooooo good. Healthy food that actually tastes good. Way Cooler has only grimaced and blanched at one of the recipes that I have foisted at him. Which for Way Cooler is a bit of a record.

5. I just finished reading "Invisible Chains" by Benjamin Perrin. I totally recommend it. It is a concise look at human trafficking and what ordinary people can do about it. While it was written from a Canadian perspective there is still lots of good information in it no matter what country you live in. Read it. Read it. Read it. I may be silent again a bit on the old blog as I find myself with a lot of letters to write now.

6. WARNING: SHAMELESS NAME DROPPING AHEAD: I used to babysit the author. He was a bit of a brat back in the day. Has totally redeemed himself now by becoming so invested in stopping this shameful, shameful industry.

7. We started Spring break this week with the world's shortest bout of the stomach flu* (NOT COMPLAINING) and based on the coughing last night appear to be ending it with croup. Spud may never want a school holiday again.

*They were each sick for three hours and then ALL WAS WELL. It was utterly bizarre. NOT COMPLAINING.

For more quick takes from bloggers who you know, actually blog visit Jennifer at Conversion Diary.

Hey Dad, Look: a New Post

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Tue, 08 Mar 2011 12:43:00 +0000

We had a family dinner the other night to celebrate my dad's birthday. He is now officially a senior citizen! As evidenced by the fact that he now attends hymn sings on a regular basis. I think this is a requirement of all Christian seniors. They must believe that the music is JUST TOO LOUD at their regular service and go to hymn sings to get away from that ratty-tat music.

ANYWAY, both he and my sister-in-law were complaining about my lack of posting. And since they are two of my biggest fans I do not wish to disappoint. My dad foolishly suggested that I just use him as blog fodder. Which to a blogger means he just painted a target on his back and declared open season.

Warning: if there is a blogger in your family do NOT tell them they can write whatever they want. Because we will. With reckless abandon.

So, dear family members and 2 random strangers this is what I have been up to:

The house is on the market. This basically means that I morph into this fanatic wide-eyed vortex of cleaning. I was getting after my 4 year old for touching the walls the other day when I realized I may need professional help. Either that or we should NEVER MOVE AGAIN.

The house sale stuff is basically my kryptonite. I have to be all OCD which does not come naturally for me and makes me rather up-tight, plus the whole house selling thing? I can't control it. I do DO NOT like things I cannot control. Which means the teen years should be just a PICNIC.

We have not had very many showings which is causing me all kinds of worry as evidenced by the fact that I have been up since three in the morning. Because you know, my lack of sleeping will be just the thing my poor children need right about now. A crazy AND overtired mother. At least they will have lots to tell their therapist.

In brighter news, the new house is going to be ready ahead of schedule. For those of you unfamiliar with the whole home-building thing, this is a VERY weird thing. They are NEVER on time. It is written in some home building manual somewhere.

So, come May we will be in the new house. Which means that Spud will finish Grade one in a new location. He is VERY excited about that. We are not exactly sure why but we are thankful that the move is not causing him much anxiety as this has not always been the case.

So to sum up:
The house will be ready early
I am a cleaning machine
Also a little crazy
But you knew that already.

The end.

On Big Families And Being Scared

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Thu, 17 Feb 2011 17:45:00 +0000

Elizabeth Esther (whom I adore by the way) wrote a post this morning about large families and Christians. And it stuck in my craw a little bit. So rather than hi-jack her comments I thought I'd share right here on my own blog.

First let me say, we have two kids. Whom we adore. And when asked if I am done (which is a VERY rude question by the way) I smile sweetly and say "oh yes." However, I am not at all opposed to large families. In fact half of the blogs I read are of larger families. I LOVE their families. I love those moms. I totally support them in their decision to be counter cultural with their large brood. Janet, Dianna, Char, Lady Why, you all rock the party.

However, it doesn't make them better than me.

It doesn't make them holier, more full of faith, more sanctified or more blessed. In some of their cases it makes them obedient as they truly believe that this was what God called them to.

But he did not call me. Trust me. I asked. Many times.

And apart from a few verses in the Psalms that are sometimes taken out of context God is rather silent on family size.

I am not afraid. I am simply living the life I believe God called me to.

You see, we Christians are REALLY good at finding something that works for us and extrapolating it to include all Christians. I've seen it argued that God has called us to be more organized, more crafty, cleaner, adopt babies, sell everything, get everything, sing more hymns, sing more worship songs, follow very traditional gender roles, smash traditional gender roles and so on.

It's enough to send those that are not Christians screaming into the night.

Ands I've seen scriptural support for ALL these things. Sometimes taken wildly out of context but still.

And amidst all of this we tend to miss the point. It's not about what we do.

We are saved by grace.

What we do should flow out of the relationship we have with our Saviour and Creator. And we serve an infinitely complex God so his people are going to look so very different.

Even when they are obedient.

This doesn't make them stupid or scared or sissies.

It makes them a reflection of the God who created them. The church was not called to be uniform, it was called to be obedient.

So if God is calling you to have 14 children please go do so. And let me know so I can send you a gift. Cause if there is one thing I do know about lots of kids, your'e probably gonna want some pants for this baby without holes in the knees.

We just all need to do that which we are convicted by the Holy Spirit to do.

By grace.

How To Make Salad Dressing, Geek Style

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Mon, 31 Jan 2011 11:46:00 +0000

The following is a lesson in Geek cooking. Read carefully and learn from me, oh grasshopper.

1. Have husband make subtle hint about homemade dressing, "I bet you could make Catalina dressing. I don't think it would be hard."*

2. Decide to whip up some salad dressing while making dinner.

3. Find reasonable looking recipe online.

4. Try to figure out how the heck one grates an onion.

5. Quickly discover that using a box grater will turn the onion slimy, but not at all grated.

6. Try using your immersion blender. It works. With the added bonus of being tear free. Your eyes will burn as if they are actually on fire and one or both eyelids will twitch convulsively, but hey, you will not cry.

7. Add paprika. Discover that what you thought was paprika from your spice rack was actually cinnamon sugar.

8. Blame the twitching eyelid.

9. practice self-control.

10 rinse out blasted cinnamon/ onion mixture and start again.

11. Follow the recipe correctly this time.

12. Take dressing to husband for taste-test. First words out of husband's mouth will be "this looks weird doesn't it?"

13. Decide that all you need is ONE woman on the jury and you would NEVER be convicted.

14. Practice self-control.

15. Have husband pronounce it good. Nothing like Catalina dressing, but he would still eat it.

16 Go finally start supper.

*The House of Geek has a very traditional division of labour. It works for us. Usually.

DO NOT Read this if You Are in Your First Trimester. You Have Been Warned

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Wed, 26 Jan 2011 12:41:00 +0000

I posted a while ago that I was going to make a chai tea concentrate. I have been working on finding the spices which is harder than I thought it would be in this very multi-cultural city. For example, Wal-Mart has cloves and cinnamon sticks. That's it.

So, I had to go to Superstore. Like most Western Canadians I have a love/hate relationship with that place. Most are on the dirty side, they are often out of what you need and customer service is about as plentiful as flip flops in January. However, the prices are low. Real low. And they sell decadent chocolate chip cookies. Plus most have a HUGE aisle dedicated to ethnic food.

And that is where I found myself on Saturday night desperately seeking star anise along with many families stocking up for Chinese New Year.

Now you have to understand something. I have a touchy stomach. It is my children' fault. Before pregnancy I rarely threw up. I could handle almost anything. Very little made me queasy. Enter hormones and pregnancies where even reading the Bible could make me sick and even now six years later it is AMAZING the stuff that can make me gag. So I found myself amongst the crunchy fried shrimp chips, the seaweed and other delicacies and I realized I was in trouble.

SERIOUS trouble.

You know the phrase I just threw up in my mouth?

I actually did.

Right there in the ethnic aisle of super store. And when they say super, they are referring to the store's size, not the fact that it is any kind of awesome. They are MASSIVE. And I had a mouth full of puke. Fortunately usually I travel with children with bladders the size of an ant so I knew where the washrooms were, but it was a long sprint to get to them.

Made further complicated by the fact that most of the checkouts were closed with gates blocking your way to the blessed bathroom.

All the while I had a MOUTH FULL OF STUFF.

I passed the floral aisle and had an overwhelming urge to just spit it into one of the buckets and just calmly walk away.

You will be pleased to know I did not. Although I am not sure any of you are still reading anymore. I really have no concept of how much is just TOO MUCH INFORMATION.

I made it, spit, rinsed my mouth out with water and vowed once again, to NEVER go back there again.

Or at least until I run out of flour.

A Year of Grace

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Mon, 24 Jan 2011 12:35:00 +0000

Back at the beginning of 2010, Anne Voskamp shared that her word for the year was going to be Yes. It would be a year of saying yes for her. The whole idea greatly intrigued me so I too choose a word. Mine was grace. I did not feel as if I was good at it, giving or receiving so this would be the year that I choose grace.

I had no idea at the time how much this was going to resonate.

2010 was a year when I discovered just how weak I am. For the past twelve years I have been running on adrenaline and caffeine. For five years I worked a job I did not like and quite honestly wasn't very good at. So to make up for my lack of ability I just worked hard. Very hard.

Then I had two very strong willed children. Plus I moved six times. I did not have time or energy to breath, let alone really stop and think.

This year was a tad bit different. There's nothing like major surgery to force one to slow down and evaluate themselves.

Can't say I really like what I saw.

I got face to face with my sins. Especially the persistent ones.

They are SO MANY.

Left to my own devices I do not choose good.

I choose the easy route. I am self-centered. I am quick to anger, prone to doubt and can carry a wicked grudge.

And yet, His grace really is enough. ALL my sins are forgiven. My Saviour covered it.

It truly is an indescribable gift.

Even more amazing are the times that I do say the right thing. The times I forgive. The times I can let things go. Because that is not me. Not even a little bit. That is grace working in me.

2010 was a year I realized just what grace is all about. How it was and still is extended to me.

It was also a year I began to give grace to myself.

To allow myself to say no occasionally. To potentially let people down. To forgive myself as I have been forgiven.

2010 was not the year that I choose grace, it was the year I fully expereienced it.

Amazing.

An Extrordinary Decision

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Thu, 20 Jan 2011 12:11:00 +0000

The following was written in a coffee shop on a COLD afternoon in late December. Heather of the Extraordinary Ordinary does this, she just listens and writes. I cannot listen, my ears have enough trouble with the sounds intended for me, so I watched and wrote and imagined their words.

Today marks a remarkable day for an extraordinary lady. One year sober. So as a tribute to her incredible courage I write in the style that she does so very well. No editing, just what I see and feel in the moment.

The sun is streaming in and the dust motes dance. The old man smiles at the lady, with whom he is close. You can see someone cares for him, his hair is neatly cut, his jacket is new and warm, not a brand picked up in shops frequented by old men. As they go to leave he takes the tray, a task his frame is not suited for anymore, she smiles and carries it for him. Just as she smiled when he told her a story she had probably heard before. A gentle smile, just for him.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

She is jangling her keys, waiting, pacing, another stop in a busy day. Her shadow is longer than her and quieter, less frenzied as the keys gently bob up and down in the sun. I see me as she flips through the magazine, unable to keep from doing something, anything as the waiting passes. There is just not enough time to just be.

The contrast is almost startling, a life almost done, not hurried, no more tasks that MUST BE DONE right now. RIGHT NOW. She flies on with her day, he meanders, she has many waiting on her and what she can do for them, he is now reliant on the ones he once served.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

She stomps in, a grin lighting her face as she spies the one who waits. They smile, jackets removed, coffees compared, all the while bathed in the late afternoon sun.

The dust motes dance.

Good Links For You!

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Mon, 17 Jan 2011 12:59:00 +0000

Some of the funny, thought-provoking and otherwise good stuff I've seen on the interweb in the last while.

Most of you have probably read the Wall Street Journal Article by Amy Chau on why Chinese mothers are superior. But you may have not yet read why Star Trek mothers are Superior by Nan. You MUST go read this. It is pure bloggy gold.

Awkward Pregnancy Photos. SO darn funny. My favourite involves a gun and a watermelon.

Anne Voskamp's book comes out today. If it is anything like her blog, it is a must read.

If you are a Chai fan like me, this recipe for home-made Chai concentrate looks VERY good. I have no idea if these spices are easy to come by or not, but I will let you know.

Happy Monday!

The salad He Actually Eats

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Sat, 15 Jan 2011 12:15:00 +0000

Last Spring I outed my husband as one with a rather pre-packaged palate. The following week he went to a healthy eating conference and they scared the pants off of him.

He came home a lone crusader against the evils of nitrates, trans fats and glucose-fructose. The latter is his particular enemy. Now just about everyone who reads know that this stuff is bad for you but to my husband it is particularly evil. In his mind cancer, diabetes, heart disease, bunions and bad breath can all be linked to this menace. Quite honestly I think his solution to world peace is just to get rid of all glucose fructose and instantly we would all bond over fresh bruschetta with home made bread.

I was DELIGHTED to discover he was going to try more homemade stuff. I was a little less delighted to discover his new passion did not come with a new palate.

But to his credit he is trying new recipes and we are slowly but surely eliminating all processed meat, store bought crackers and cookies and basically anything that has GF in it.

I think a turning point was the day I was making him a salad and realized that I was about to feed my husband something that had cumin, sea-salt and curly parsley in it. And what's more, he asked for it. I think I may have cried. He had even hunted up the recipe for me after trying a tomato and cucumber salad at a restaurant and thinking it was some good.

My favourite meal moment came a few weeks ago when he came home after eating out with some of the guys at work.

Now you gotta understand something about Way Cooler. When he eats out it is at a chain restaurant. Preferably one that he has been to many times before and has fish and chips and clubhouse sandwiches on the menu. But his co-workers insisted on trying this place so he looked for the "safest" thing in the deli case and settled on a pasta salad.

He came home singing the praises of this pasta salad. He described it in intricate detail and fairly soon I had pulled up Pioneer Woman on the iPad and showed him this. Turns out that Oklahoma has also come to a little deli in Calgary. It was pretty much the exact same salad. So, now, with a few modifications I make this for way cooler on a weekly basis for his lunches.

So for your eating pleasure, the two homemade recipes that Way Cooler cannot get enough of.

Dave's Tomato and Cucumber Salad - This is best in the fall when I was plucking tomatoes from our plant and then immediately chopping and serving them. We use bottled lemon juice and Way Cooler also really likes it with red onion. And now my mother in law will faint dead away upon learning that her son is actually eating onions. If you live in a climate where you can harvest tomatoes in the summer than this is more a summer salad. If you harvest your tomatoes in the spring, well, please just keep that tidbit of information to yourself mmmkay? Thus says she who lives where today's high is a balmy -17C (1F)

Sun dried Tomato Pasta Salad We ALL love this salad, with the exception of Sprout but then he doesn't really count as he eats two grapes a week and is full. Because fresh basil is impossibly hard to find and impossibly expensive up here in the winter I use the stuff in a tube. Please do not judge me. Come summer I will grow the stuff on my deck and make my salad even more magical. I also reduce the oil to 3/4 cup, take out the olives (as Way Cooler's new passion for good food only goes so far) and am very generous with the red wine vinegar.

Bon Appetit.

I can't Wait to See The Google Searches I Get Off This Post

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Wed, 12 Jan 2011 12:43:00 +0000

As I may have mentioned a time or two, when it comes to food, Way Cooler and I are on opposite ends of the spectrum. I live to eat and he just eats to live. Which means he has NO appreciation for the finer things of life.

One of them being stew. He cannot think of anything more gross. On a cold January day I cannot think of anything more sublime. Elizabeth Esther talks about the sacrament of soup, for me it is the sacrament of stew. So, as he was working the other night I asked my sister-in-law to come for stew. She too knows what is good and was only to happy to come.

Now, we're both moms and have learned to go with the flow but this supper gave gong show a whole new meaning.

To start, my niece was fussy. This child is NEVER fussy. You know the type, slept through the night from day one, smiles all the time, obeys pretty rapidly and only poops rainbows. Pretty much the opposite of the harum scarum I am raising.

However, she fussed through the whole meal, milk was spilled, food flung, and a general good time was had by none. We soon figured out why as the potty training sweetie came down with the runs. Several times. And this time it was NOT rainbows. In her big girl pants. PRAISE GOD for ceramic tile.

So my SIL dealt with the mess, I tossed my niece into the tub and my children ran around being gophers. Excessively loud and possibly rabid gophers.

We got a diaper on, baby girl got all cleaned up and went off to play with the gophers. I was just about to offer my SIL a well deserved cup of tea when a shriek was heard from upstairs. You know the type shriek. The " I have sat on the folded up pack and play and somehow managed to trap my scrotum in the plastic legs" shriek. Yes indeedy.

My oldest child had managed to once again cause his scrotum to bleed. At the rate he is going if I get a grandchild out of this son it will be a blessed miracle.

It took Advil, an icepack, ice cream and 30 minutes of Toopy and Binoo to get him to calm down.

My sister in law smiled and got the heck outta dodge. And continued to pray that this next baby be another girl.

It's Always Cooler on an iPhone

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Mon, 10 Jan 2011 12:01:00 +0000

A month or so ago Way Cooler installed Words with Friends on my iPad. Oh.My.Heavens that game is addictive. It has brought us both hours of geeky joy. It does not hurt that I am better at it than he. This is only due to the fact that I have had my nose buried in a book for the better part of my life whereas the last time Way Cooler read through a book cover to cover the majority of Americans still approved of George Bush as president.

I've discovered something about myself. I may be a tad bit competitive. (Insert Way Cooler shouting up the stairs "a bit? A bit?" but let's just ignore that shall we?) Trouncing my husband brings me joy at a level that is almost a bit sad.

To redeem myself, let me explain. Way Cooler is a gamer. This can loosely be translated to mean that he takes the fun right out of family game night. He questions most of my moves, offers tips and will not play any game where winning is not the ultimate goal. SO FUN. Finally, for the good of our marriage we stopped playing games together about five years ago. But now, I can be another room and still play scrabble with him. It's awesome.

Except I am NEVER to refer to it as Scrabble. Which apparently is a game for geeks. Playing it on an iPhone however as the technology redeems the cool factor. Or at least as cool as it is going to get for a family where we both have blogs, twitter accounts and consider an episode of Star Trek Voyager a treat.

What about you, what games bring you all closer together?

Staying Alive With Preschoolers

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Thu, 06 Jan 2011 12:15:00 +0000

It's January. Which for those of us who live in Northern Climes, the month that NEVER ends.

NEVER.

I think last January was 392 days long.

I have absolutely no scientific data to back this up, but I would venture a guess that this is the month that causes many a SAHM to pack it in and go back to work.

We are almost at the end of it. Sprout starts Kindergarten in the fall. I go back to work. (I have no idea what I will be doing but it will be something part time.) But I thought I would share with you all some of the things that got us through this month in the past. Feel free to leave your killer suggestions in the comments.

Rice table. I spread an old table cloth on the floor, fill a tub with rice and hand the kids a bunch of spoons, sieves, cars and what not and let them go to town. It is messy, you will get rice on the floor, but it does kill at least an hour.

Baking. My kids have done this so much that they pretty much can make muffins by themselves with me just supervising the cracking of the eggs and reading the directions. We always have baked good in the freezer this way, it takes up time and it teaches them all kinds of useful skills like sneaking dough when mommy isn't looking, how to fish eggshells out of dough and how best to removed dough from cupboards when flung there by bored 2 year olds.

Painting With Water. This is the red neck version of aqua doodle. I give my kids a container of water, large sheets of construction paper and a paint brush. It is a bit frightening how much my kids enjoyed this. It's a sure sign we need to get them out more often.

Cutting: The boys have spent HOURS and HOURS cutting pictures of of magazines and saving them for goodness knows what. They also used to enjoy cutting things out and them gluing them into pretend houses drawn on large sheets of paper. According to my kids, the best use of kitchen space is often a leafblower or a motor bike.

Penny drop. To help my kids with their fine motor skills I cut a small slot in the top of a clean yogurt container and they had to pick up pennies with one hand and drop them in the container. This also was a surprise hit. If they grow up to be surgeons I'd like the credit for their killer dexterity. I'd also like a bit of their money.

Obstacle Courses: Our living room was often transformed into an obstacle course. There was jumping (over wooden spoons) bouncing (over couch cushions) throwing (bean bags into empty garbage bins) and crawling (under a broom suspended by two chairs.) It was great for gross motor and lots of fun.

Ice melt: I fill a Styrofoam cup with a bit of water, and stick in an old plastic toy. Then I freeze it and then give it to the boys to work together to melt and free the toy. This is cold, but lots of fun. The boys had a blast coming up with all the ways the warm the ice up faster.

We've also done sidewalk chalk in the unfinished basement, used washable markers on our windows, played clothespin games, painted till our arms fell off, taken long bubble baths in the middle of the day and made crafts by the pound.

What about you? How do you get through January?

A Look back

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Sun, 02 Jan 2011 12:42:00 +0000

I must confess, the news junkie in me loves all the year in review features taht happen this time of the year. So, for your reading pleasure, 2010 in review at the hosue of Geek.

January. It was cold. It snowed. Like all Januarys it was 385 days long.

February: It was not cold. We lost most of our snow. It was LOVELY. The Olympics were on. Canada kicked some major tushie. I visited the ER with a child for the very first time which I do believe is a MIRACLE with the way my boys attack life. Or in this case, are attacked by cousin's whose fingernails could have used a trim before they connected with my son's eye.

March: Sprout turned four. I turned a lot older than four. I found out that I would be needing surgery. I ate a large quantity of chocolate.

April: I cleaned. And cleaned and cleaned some more. If I couldn't control when my surgery date was going to be by golly I was going to control something.

May: I went into the hospital feeling great. I came out feeling as if someone had cut open my chest, pulled back my ribcage and took something out of my lungs. Oh wait, I felt like that because that is actually what happened. I can't say I recommend this. I spent the rest of the month throwing up and watching TV.

June: It snowed. It was cold. I was FINALLY allowed to drive again. Spud finished Kindergarten. He was quite disappointed to learn that it was not the end of his academic career.

July: We vacationed. It was full of family, friends, beaches, splash pads and LOTS of memories.

August: We went for a drive in the country. We went to a small town. We decided we would JUST LOOK at some houses. We signed the papers for a new house three days later.

September: Spud started grade one. We all cried a lot. We picked out all the stuff for our new house. Which basically consisted of us saying to the designer "whatever you think looks good together."

October: I started the long process of rehabilitating a house that had been left to its own devices for several months. I cleaned a lot.

November: The beginning of winter. Nuff said.

December: Advent. Christmas. It's all good.

Fancy Meeting You Here

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Fri, 31 Dec 2010 13:10:00 +0000

My parents have the boys for two days. TWO DAYS. And instead of doing as I normally do and taking on 674 projects my only project has been to blog. Well that and to hang out with my niece. My house is ALL boys ALL THE TIME, so it will be very nice to have some girl time. Especially sweet two year old girl time.

So I took myself off to a coffee house to blog. This is the first time I have done this. But Way Cooler’s dumb laptop won’t accept the lovely free wifi. And blogging on a iPad makes me grumpy. My fat fingers keep messing up all the keys. SO, I am writing in a word document and will cut and paste later.

So, how was your Christmas? Actually, how was your December? I KNOW. I haven’t blogged in a month. The words are there, it’s finding the time and the energy to get them onto the laptop that we are struggling with.

Our Christmas was fantastic. Low key, just the way we like it. Way Cooler had to work Christmas Eve but this is something that our shift working family takes in stride. Both my parents were shift workers, my brother is a shift worker, you learn to celebrate when and how you can. And it is good.

This year Way Cooler and I exchanged presents, we don’t always but the boy needed a remote car starter for the cold nights when he gets off at 4:00 in the morning and his wife wanted a dutch oven. He asked what it was for and when I told him Soups and stews I know that he loved me when he still bought it. Way Cooler doesn’t classify either really as food.

Spud’s deepest desires were met when my parents gave him a plastic figurine of a green alien from Toy Story. I thought the boy was going to jump out of his skin he was so excited. I think he talked about that thing the entire Christmas morning and he went to sleep the figurine clutched in his pudgy little hand.

Sprout on the other hand did not get all his wishes come true as the home made pajamas his Nana gave them were of Sesame Street and not Toy Story and so a young man had a heart to heart with his mother that may have contained this parenting nugget, “if you aren’t thankful I will give all your toys away.” It was a rather idle threat, but he did not sense that and the evil behaviour ceased and desisted.

All in all our December was lovely, full of good things and the people we really like and we cannot wait for the excitement a new year brings. How about you?

Is Anyone There?

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Tue, 23 Nov 2010 04:32:00 +0000

Hello.

Hello?

Is this thing on?

You should see the re-darndiculous number of posts started and not finished in the last few weeks. CRAZY.

Much like the weather of late. It is currently -19 but he windchill makes it feel like -35. Which I must say is darn cold. Especially when the boys were playing in the park in shirt sleeves two weeks ago.
So I'd like to blame my lack of postings on the cold weather.

Or maybe I could blame it on my cookie. I'm still eating my COOKIE.

Whatever.

However, I feel I owe you all something.

So, here is actual conversation with a young son who shall remain nameless. (Because it won't take you long to figure it out.)

"Buddy, it's really cold out today. You need to wear a long sleeve shirt. Not short sleeves, but long sleeves." As I am saying this, I am touching his arms to indicate where the sleeve should end.

"What kind of a shirt should you wear today bud?"

"Long sleeved."

"Good job. Get going."

Any guesses as to what he showed up in 3 minutes later?

Anyone?

Anyone?

Hint. My head popped right off my shoulders.

And now I need to go get a cookie.

*The dude in the video is the head of Health Services in Alberta. For now.

A Teeny Tiny Bit of a Rant

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Thu, 11 Nov 2010 10:19:00 +0000

There was a big Hullabaloo on Twitter yesterday regarding a very bad book and a large Internet retailer that was carrying it. All kinds of people were Up.In.Arms that the large retailer would dare to carry such a horrid book.

And make no mistake, I think it is a horrid book. HORRID. The fact that someone would write something like that offends me right to the core of my being.

But I think the very large retailer is fully within it's right to carry that book.

Freedom of speech does not just apply when we agree with a person. It also applies when we think the person is a big fat wacko.

And quite honestly all the sensation yesterday was SCADS of free publicity for the very large retailer and for the awful book.

And while the very large retailer bowed to public pressure and removed the book, I wonder at what cost. I think these things because I am part of a "religion" that says things that offends people. Not everyone is offended, but some of my beliefs collide sharply with those around me.

I am SO lucky to live where I am allowed to express thoughts and beliefs that are different from others and maybe even different from the mainstream without fear of recrimination. So I get very nervous when those rights are restricted.

To me, a better way to deal with the very bad book is to ignore it.

Totally.

Let's face it. 98% of society is NOT going to buy that book. They are going to be offended. They are maybe even going to choose another retailer, one that does not sell that book.

No matter who carries it, the book will not sell well. If we ignore it, the author will get no free publicity or even much public acknowledgement and the whole thing will fade away.

And that would be the ultimate in justice.

Notes From a Sleepy Momma

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Mon, 08 Nov 2010 02:45:00 +0000

Time change happened last night.

Which meant that this morning at 4:30 Spud and I were having a little cuddle. Because really, who needs to sleep past 5:00? Not my kids.

Which meant by 4:30 tonight I was one grumpy-pants momma. All plans I had for a big night of thought provoking blogging are gone, along with a sizable pile of fun-sized chocolate bars from my freezer.

Note, Aero tastes even better frozen. Twix, not so much.

So, I was delighted to see this meme on Nicole's blog.

1. What's on your Christmas Wish List?

Quite often I have a hard time coming up with anything I really need. However, I have been spending more and more time in the kitchen as we slowly wean ourselves off of processed food and this year I have all kinds of goodies I would like.

So Santa, if you are listening, I would like a micro-plane grater, a dutch oven, a pizza stone, a pizza peel, an immersion blender, and new slippers. Look at me, all I need is a pearl necklace and bam, I am a 1950's housewife.

2. Do your boys have a hand held video game?

Nope. They haven't even campaigned for one. Which would be sort of a lost cause. We have an iPad and I can control the gaming on that. No other gaming for at least a few more years. Yes, I am one of those moms. We also don't have a x-box, play station or whatever gaming thing-y is popular today. I have enough trouble getting Spud active. Handing him a hand-held device would ensure that he never moved again.

3. What's your favourite type of cookie?

Whatever is being offered to me at the time. Except oatmeal raisin which do not deserve the name cookie. It's basically a baked lump of porridge. But other than that, cookies are goooood.

4. Coffee or Tea?

Tea. Lots and lots of tea. Green tea, herbal tea, and orange pekoe with a splash of milk and a bit of sugar. And tea lattes. And iced tea. Tea good. Coffee bad.

And now I am off to sleep.

Night all.

Fast Food in Your Kitchen

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Fri, 05 Nov 2010 11:52:00 +0000

As I tweeted the other day, Way Cooler is home for supper every night this week. For those of you new here, he is a shift worker and thusly I only have to make real supper about 50-60 % of the time. The rest of the time it is veggies, fruit and muffins.

I used to make hot supper for the boys and myself but spending 40 minutes cooking to then spend 40 minutes trying to force food down Sprout's throat and then have to put them to bed on my own is not my idea of a good time.

So I apply the KISS principle of dinner preparation and everyone is much happier.

This week however, I feel like a normal wife. I have a menu and everything. Look out Martha. Next thing you know I will be decorating something.

Oh, stop laughing. It could happen. Most likely in a parallel universe, but it could.

ANYWAY, Monday night's supper was such a huge hit (and is usually) that I thought I would share it with you. There will be no pictures as me taking a picture of myself cooking is as likely as me advising my sister-in-law on fashion. NEVER GONNA HAPPEN.

Anyway, we had homemade fish and chips. It is relatively cheap, easy and kicks Captain Highliner's butt in the taste department.

Fish Nuggets

(Adapted from a Light and Tasty recipe by LaDonna Reid)

I use cod, but you could use any firm fleshed white fish. Except catfish. For the love of all that is good in this world, please do not feed that nasty stuff to your family. Yes, I'm talking to you Texas.

1/3 cup breadcrumbs

1/3 cup crushed cornflakes (throw a couple of big handfuls in a ziploc and work out your aggression - you want them fairly fine)

3 TBSP Parmesan cheese (the powdered stuff from the can, this is not fine dining)

1/4-1/2 tsp lemon pepper seasoning (depending on your liking of the stuff)

1.5 lbs fish fillets, cut into 1 inch cubes

1 egg, well beaten

In a shallow bowl, combine bread crumbs, cheese, cornflakes and lemon pepper. In a separate bowl, beat egg well. Dip fish into egg and then roll in crumb mixture.

Place on a baking sheet coated with non-stick spray (do not be like me and forget to skip this step, unless you like scrubbing cookie sheets all night) and bake at 375 for 15-20 minutes or until fish flakes easily with a fork.

Home Fries

I go by guess and by golly on these ones. I cut up a few potatoes into sticks (I go a little larger than traditional fries) and soak them in cold water for a half hour or so. (This step is not essential, but it seems to make them crisper.) Then I drain them well and toss them with a drizzle of olive oil and a sprinkle or two of sea salt. Throw them on a cookie sheet and if you are baking them with the fish you will need to bake them for 4o minutes or so. If you can have your oven at around 425 they will cook much faster and get nice and brown. But since I only have one oven and do not wish my fish to resemble shoe leather I do it this way.

Serve with a nice salad and your family will rise up and call you blessed. Or maybe rise up and do the dishes. Which would be even better.

A little Re-Cap If I May

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Wed, 03 Nov 2010 11:29:00 +0000

I actually have a free evening. And while there are things I really need to do, you should SEE the state of my front hall closet, the creative side of my brain is BUZZING with words. I need to let some of them out.

Post haste.

So, I will bore you a little with a Halloween re-cap.

I'd insert pictures but then you all would want to steal my ever so adorable children. And we couldn't have that. Well, we could have had that on Friday in the midst of the BIGGEST TANTRUM EVER, but normally, no.

So you will have to paint a picture in your mind of the world's cutest Woody and Buzz Lightyear.

Woody was actually not even here. He got to go on his very first solo trip to Poppa and Nana's house. And then on a road trip with them to the cousins. He was almost popping out of his skin with glee. And his brother was popping with jealousy. Which may have lead to the BIGGEST TANTRUM EVER, but I really do not want to go there. So I won't.

So it was up to Buzz and I to paint the town black and orange. And that we did. We trick or treated twice. As soon as church was done we headed to a mall in town and hit up the local merchants (when we were not shooting them with our fake laser) and then that evening a certain Mr. Lightyear sprinted from house to house for an hour and a half.

If you are at all familiar with trick or treating on the Canadian prairies you will know that it is usually DARN cold. More often than not snow is involved. This year, was different. It was 10C. TEN.

We could have stayed out all night it was so balmy. Last year we had four kids visit our house. This year it was more like forty.

Spud's haul of chocolate alone filled two large freezer bags. Why yes, I do freeze my kid's chocolate bars. This way I get to dole them out all year long. They will still have treats in January for lunches this way. This works well for the cheap control freaks who do not wish to pay for fillings.

It really was a blast. I LOVED the joy that Spud got out of being Buzz. He actually asked me to call him Buzz instead of Spud all day. He WAS Buzz. He WAS childhood joy. It WAS perfect.

You Wanna Talk Distracted?

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Mon, 18 Oct 2010 11:16:00 +0000

My province is considering distracted driver legislation. It has been rumoured to include things like texting, shaving while driving, talking on a handheld device, etc. If they really wanted to get to the heart of distracted driving though, they need to include getting into the car with my kids.

I used to think driving with a screaming baby was distracting. NOT EVEN A LITTLE compared to driving with Sir Talks a Lot and his sidekick Chatty- Chatty Kick Kick.

The other day on the freeway marked this little exchange:

SPud: My eye hurts.

Me: Bub, we're going really fast and there is no place to pull over. (Note, he was not crying or anything, so it was more a "I'm bored, let's make up a malady" kind of thing than a real emergency, so please don't call social scervices M'kay?)

Spud: But it HURTS. What should I do?

Me: Blink.

4.7 seconds later

Spud: It's not working!

Me: (While simultaneously changing lanes and silently cursing texting teenagers and the parents who give them cellphones) Just close your eyes.

Spud: But I will bump into things!!!!

Me: In your car seat?

Spud: At the house!!! I'll never see again!!!!!!

Me: (realizing again that drama is not limited to women) honey, it'll feel better soon. I promise.

A few more minutes of wondering if all drivers on the Deerfoot are blind and drunk.

Spud: My eye is better now.

Me: that's great!! I told you it would get better.

Spud: (with a derision usually only found in teenaged girls) I did not DO anything that you said. You didn't help at all. It just got better.

Insert few moments of correction regarding attitude.

Spud: My leg hurts. What do I do?

The Block is One of Life's Little Mysteries.

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Fri, 15 Oct 2010 11:53:00 +0000

1. Spud is a complicated kid to get gifts for. Usually what I think he would like he looks at, gets excited for 3.6 seconds and then goes off to sing and wave a block around in the air. This year we bought him a CD player and I suggested to his Auntie that he might like tickets to a movie.

2. I am a genius. He loves listening to his CD player with an everlasting love. Even on our vacation to the beach he was constantly telling people how much he missed his CD player. The relaxer boy loves NOTHING more than to go to his room, turn on his CD player, wave a block around and sing.

3. The movie was also a BIG hit. With one dire consequence. He is now obsessed with Toy Story Three. Actually, I think obsessed is a bit too mild of a word to describe the love affair between my boy and Pixar's latest attempt to rid parents of all their money.

4. I have not seen the movie, but I am now able to give an accurate plot synopsis. Quite honestly I think I could do a dissertation on the thing as that is ALL I have heard about from my son since he saw the movie. TWO MONTHS AGO. Two VERY LONG months ago.

5. This means that he no longer wants to be a pirate for Halloween. I really thought I could make it stretch for 4 years, but no dice. (Yes, he was a pirate for three years running. Why do you ask?)

6. So imagine with me the SHEER joy of finding a Buzz LightYear costume at a consignment store today. In Spud's size. If I thought I could have gotten away with it I would have danced on the checkout counter.

7. So, tonight a VERY happy young man has gone to bed to "think about my wonderful new costume." I guess sometimes one needs a break from waving a block around and singing.

For more Pixar free takes please see Jennifer at Conversion Diary.

Grace

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Thu, 07 Oct 2010 12:01:00 +0000

They were running behind. And little mouths were thirsty. And little hands were disobedient. And a mommy who is covered in tired snapped. And scolded. And generally did everything she prays so hard not to do.

And there was a gentle voice that showed the mommy the crying child.

And the mommy instantly repented.

She cuddled. She apologized. She was hugged back with abandon.

Maybe this is what grace looks like.

They haeded out into the sun, laughing, joking, running. Two little hands slipped into hers, no mention of the previous moments, just complete trust in her.

Is this what grace looks like?

The falling, the stumbling, the mommy trying to make her way through a day, a day filled with love and ordinary moments and a just few moments of failure.

Then they ran ahead and the sun was so brilliant that it blotted out the distinguishable and all the mommy could see was their outline bathed in gold.

They were them, and they were light. Pure light.

Could this be grace?

A sinner stumbling forward, falling, rising and bathed in His light.

Grace.

Let's Talk About Me

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Mon, 04 Oct 2010 10:00:00 +0000

I've been tagged for a meme by the incomparable Tonggu Momma who is starting to get the nest ready for the arrival of their second daughter. Who they have been waiting for over 50 months now.

I kid you not. The woman has learned her some patience over the past four years.

TM is one of my biggest commenters and one of my favorite imaginary friends so I feel it is only fair I do her meme. That and it has actually been nice out so I have no time to think of something creative, I am too busy enjoying the warmth.

1. What is your biggest pet peeve? People who make me late. I HATE being late with every FIBRE of my being. If someone else is late, that's fine but if they make me late, WATCH OUT. I will definitely think mean thoughts about them. (I'm 5' 2 " and completely out of shape. Mean thoughts are about all I can do.)

2. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you and why? I quite like where we live right now. The mountains are close, my family is close and Way Cooler is working a job he LOVES. This seems quite ideal to me. Plus, being here means that I am not moving. I've done that a lot. It's highly over-rated. So here is good.

3. Have you ever been searched by the cops? No. I'm law-abiding to a fault. Mainly out of fear. I've only even been pulled over once and that almost made me puke I was so scared. We've gotten to know a lot of police officers over the years and so my fear has lessened, but I am still rather afraid of any police type encounter.

4. What is the one thing on your mind now? I am currently psyching myself up to put two slightly punchy little boys to bed by myself. Usually this is no big deal but tonight I am facing a lot of exhaustion after a VERY busy week and I must confess I have contemplated letting them stay up watching TV until they just fall asleep on the floor. So, whose gonna nominate me for mother of the year? Anyone? Anyone?

5. Favorite song right now? Don't have one. Least favorite song? ANYTHING sung by a cucumber and tomato.

6. What talent do you wish you had? I wish I could draw or paint or play an instrument or sing or understand math or dance or play sports with any measure of skill. Any of those would be fine. All would be FANTASTIC. So would owning a unicorn. And the latter is going to happen a lot faster than the former.

7. Favorite Drink? coke zero. But please don't tell anyone, I really do not need any more snide comments about what artificial sweeteners are doing to my brain.

8. In one word, how would you describe yourself? Oh heavens. I have a BLOG. Which means I am fairly self-occupied and verbose. I can barely describe myself in one well-written essay, let alone a word.

But enough about me, what one word would YOU use to describe me?

A Clarification of Sorts

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Fri, 01 Oct 2010 09:29:00 +0000

Apparently my last post has sparked all kinds of controversy. As well as bringing shame to my entire family. Let me clarify. I used the serving spoon to move the chunks of tomatoes, THAT HAD NEVER TOUCHED MY MOUTH back into the bowl. I may be a geek, but I do have some class. Sorta.

Is it just me, or do kids have more days off of school than they used to? Spud went three Fridays, than he got one off, attends one, gets the next off, goes for two, gets the next one off, goes for one, than one off, two, than one off and gets the last Friday before Christmas off as well. Of the 16 Fridays this semester he gets six off. Plus Thanksgiving Monday, Remembrance Day and Labour Day.

Upon reading that last quick take, I realized it made me sound 150 years old. Next thing you know I will be smacking my gums and talking about walking 17 miles to school, barefoot and in the snow. And then I will have an early lunch, pull my cardigan around me and take a little nap.

After two weeks of completely unreasonable cold, it was warm this week. About as warm as what we had most summer. Seriously. I heard on the radio the other day that our city motto really should be: Calgary, the city that summer forgot. It was utterly GLORIOUS to be outside with the kids. I had to resist the urge to break into song when walking Spud to the bus. But seeing as how I don't want to permanently scar my children, I refrained.

Today is my baby sister's birthday. She's had a DOOZEY of a week, the highlight of which was her two year old son climbing onto the counters and attempting to cut himself an orange with a serrated knife. GOOD TIMES. Fortunately it was nothing that could not be fixed with a My Little Pony Band-Aid. However, I am certain she would love any birthday comments you would like to leave her.

I know I keep saying this. But I am coming to the conclusion that it is high time I started wearing make-up. Today I looked like a ghost with a hang-over. Pretty soon I am going to start scaring small children. I have made it my goal for October to figure out what I need to wear and how to properly put it on.

My goal setting skills are astounding are they not?

Somewhere across town my sister in law is jumping up and down for joy. She is now about to text me, "yes, you really do. Can I come pick some out for you?"

For more quick takes, please see Jennifer at Conversion Diary. And while you are there, please check out her post on prayer. This post has impacted me in a HUGE way this week.

Please Don't Judge Me.

noreply@blogger.com (happygeek) — Wed, 29 Sep 2010 03:23:00 +0000

I have a little confession. I hate tomatoes.

HATE EM.

Other than bananas, they are pretty much the worst thing I have ever put in my mouth.

Unfortunately, tomatoes are a staple in culinary life. And as much as this puzzles me, the rest of you seem to think they are worth slicing and eating, pureeing and putting on pizza and even adding sugar to and dipping fries in.

WEIRD.

Because I like to conform to society as much as a geek can, as well as set a good example for my kids I have tried to overcome my dislike of the fruit that thinks it is a vegetable. I no longer scrap the sauce off of my pizza, make spaghetti frequently and actually enjoy sun-dried tomatoes. I still do not dip my fries in ketchup, but if a drop of ketchup gets on one of mine, I no longer think it is ruined forever.

Raw tomatoes are a different story. Those things are still NASTY.

The other day I was at a friend's house for lunch. A new friend. One that is kind of unaware of my MANY quirks. When I first meet people I do try to present myself as geek free as possible to avoid scaring them. THEN, as we become friends I slowly peel back the onion that is me, and let them see all the layers.

But this friend and I aren't really into the peeling stage. SO, when she asked if I would like a Mediterranean salad for lunch I said "sure!"

She had listed off the ingredients as tomatoes, cucumbers, peppers. My active imagination added garlic, onion and a healthy dose of feta.

I can eat anything if there is feta involved.

There wasn't.

No onions.

I think I saw a pepper chunk or two, but I cannot be certain as it was lost among all the tomatoes.

For the two of us, It think the woman chopped about eight tomatoes. And a quarter of a cucumber. It was really past all reason.

So, we started in. I tried to alternate. I'd have a bite of bread and then throw the tomato in past my taste buds and try to survive that way. Unfortunately, there isn't enough bread in the world to make my scheme work.

Still I kept on.

And started to gag. Ever tried to hide the fact that you are gagging, and trying to turn it into "JUST LOVING THE SALAD?" Not all that easy. But I kept trying.

(Yes, I am aware that I might have some small people pleasing issues, but unless that really bothers you, I do not plan to change.)

Then it happened. The MIRACLE.

Her phone rang. She left the room. Her five year old and Sprout began to engage in an animated conversation about the trampoline.

And while everyone else was busy, I began operation "Dump the Junk."

One nasty red chunk at a time I took the tomatoes from my plate and put them back in the salad.

Oh yes, I did.

I don't even feel guilty.

It was either that or puking and somehow I don't think that presents the cool image I was going for.