THE INNER WORKINGS OF ONE JUICY WOMAN

Paramour Haunting

2008-04-11T16:04:00.000-07:00

I ache for your Tempting Mouth wetting my Fruitful Curves kissed

I reminisce over talks on wanderings through warm, earthy paths.

I listen during Muted Twilight for Your Truth caressing Bare Walls

I dress in Echoes tuned to Rhythmic Promises composed on lazy Sunday mornings

I search Unwashed Sheets sealed with your scent to sooth my Purple Passion

I yearn for Warm Winds to trace your Secret Travels upon my awakened skin

I starve without your Secret Whispers once swallowed by Hungry Ears

I hide my Deepest Cries to honor the harmony of Your Laughter and Mine

I send you repeated Telepathic Messages that always Return to Sender

I search Past Lives lived to capture our memories, My Paramour

I sketch my next Reincarnation to seal your Heart, My Lover

I Remain Still so I might hear your Silent Footsteps return

I Undress so your Breath may Hunt and find Mine

MY FEMALE POLYGAMIST (polyandrist) PLATFORM

2008-03-30T12:20:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: This Blog is not meant to be a moral debate of any kind. Though I do believe many of the statements I share about us as women and men, these statements are merely for exploratory and entertainment purposes only.

So it occurred to me that evidence in ancient historical recordings and present day goings-on of polygamy practice in the world may just be unnatural. Now wait. Before you say, "Well of course." I want to be clear to you about what I am feeling. A man with more than one wife (in some places in the triple digits) does not make as much natural sense as if we were to compare it to, uh, let's see, me a woman, with say 3-5 husbands.

When I was 5 years old, I went on a family visit to San Francisco. I saw two-story cottage-like houses lined tightly together on mountainous paved roads. It appeared to the pink lover in me that every other house had been soaked in milky pink Sherwin Williams. Maybe it was the era, but I loved me some pink houses. This made me choose the very premature statement that I would get married at age 6 and live in a pink house. I am happy to report that neither of these descriptions turned out to be true :).

As I grew to be an adult, I experienced what seemed like back-to-back intense relationships that resulted in marriage proposals from each of them. Soon after these proposals also came the demise of the relationships. Hmm, I see a pattern here.

Presently, I am raising a 13-year-old daughter that I have also raised alone for 13 years. I made & accepted the beautiful choice. I am having the time of my life. I do wonder however, how in the world one man could possibly fit into this world I live oh so intensely & passionately.

This got me to thinking how I have joked around a bunch of women that I need several husbands to even out all the parts to me. After all, as women we possess many facets. If you don't know them by name, I will break down the shiniest ones for you in a moment. But since we are here, I want you to think as a man or remember as a woman, how many times statements like, "You're crazy", or "You're a crazy bitch" or "Who are you?" or "Why do you get so upset" or "I don't know who you are", "Were you just pretending when we met?" and so on have been uttered out of individuals' mouths directed toward their intimate partners in times of frustration and/or abuse.

Maybe one of the answers lie in the fact that we as women are not simple creatures upon this earth but conversely, we possess many distinct facets and you have most likely met at least most of them but maybe not all in equal fashion. So Boys, let me introduce myself:

Call me Mother (the nurturer who thrives on attachment with others)
Madonna (inspiring, reflective & supportive of a man's feelings over her own, patient and faithful)
Amazon Woman (ever strong, self-sufficient, opinionated, and can forget to need you as a man at all, ready for battle as a survival instinct).
&
Courtesan (serving by never subservient, adventurous in bed, a playmate, yet also held up in high places in society, (look at our media).
I love each jewel I possess and share them freely with you (okay not always so freely).

(A fictional but absolutely common scenario) (Before reading, I also realize the opposite roles can and do take place and cause the same problems) Please read on:

Let's be honest, that when we first met I was showing one of these 4 facets (or two tops) and you decided that you wanted that exact facet in your life (much like the shiny sports car you've always dreamed or wet dreamed of). As we grew more comfortable, I felt that I could reveal someone else that lived inside me. You liked her ;). We then began to have some tense moments where you lost your job or your apartment or car and I had to introduce you to another facet. You were uneasy with her but then began to depend on her due to all the things she could do for you. Down the line, this part of her began to become stressed as your conditions worsened and she was paying all the bills though you creatively found money to buy your own Buddha or a new tattoo or was it an iphone (and just to stick it to someone who will never read this: a $3000 keyboard)? With all the stress, she began to come up short for you (because her own life was no longer being attended to) and soon your favorite naughty playmate also became weary. Maybe at this time, you began to feel like your role as a man had diminished and you began to seek the attention from another female or females who could make you feel like the man you were not exercising in the above relationship. This leads to an emotional and/or physical affair with a woman you are not in a relationship with. Enter the last facet of the woman in your relationship. She becomes like a Tsunami over the relationship washing everything away, tearing down everything that was ever built, and limiting your movement where you are at the point of ending it all (at least relationship wise).

It becomes increasingly more difficult for one woman and one man to reach a balanced exclusive relationship as the masculine nature (The Amazon) of a woman takes over the whole woman and the man begins to feel and act emasculated. A heterosexual man is not looking for another "man". Even in homosexual (male or female) relationships, there is a pattern of one partner acting more "masculine" and one to at least display more feminine traits than one's partner for the balance of the relationship. It is the balance of Ying and Yang if you will, no matter the body parts involved. With these natural essences out of balance it would seem more obvious that women in this state more naturally begin to need to have a separate male to partner to attend to each individual facet of a woman. This does not mean however, that she has the need to sleep with several men at one time. Rather each male would satisfy each facet of a woman at different points of life or different occasions. One man may be her ultimate lover while another is there to fix her car engine or build her some bookshelves in her cluttered apartment. Another man may allow her to heal his injured child spirit that struggles to live freely. Making the point that this is not a sexual reason, a gay male friend will serve her in one or several ways to her facets. No matter if we are male or female and experienced several relationships, we have all thought about how perfect it would be to have several of our past loves to be combined into one person. How likely is this? I suspect very slim but I am an optimist when it comes to my own desires so I think it is possible with balance within one's self.

It's really not about finding "the one" but discovering all that lives inside of us (women). We must create a natural balance of our own facets in order to bond with one man. Though I think in today's society this will be the greatest magic trick ever accomplished. If we cannot integrate these facets and be aware that when one facet leads the rest, we cannot allow the man in our life to be balanced as a man. Therefore, it would seem we would be more suited to live a polyandrist life in order to live out our facets separately or paired two by two. The Amazon/Mother, Amazon/Courtesan and so forth.

I admit the fantasy prospect is a wonderful one. I also admit to mentally entertaining this fantasy on several occasions. I will tell you that in times where I must be more Amazon/Mother or Amazon/Madonna or Amazon/Courtesan, I am more likely to have this fantasy. Today is a difficult time for men and women. Women are becoming more masculine and men more feminine. The men resisting become emasculated are becoming hard as platinum and we have lost the human vulnerability of a man and now they have even more of a lack of ability to bond with us a women. Of course I will not blame all the men for this. If we as women continue to ignore the fact that we have become AMAZON WOMEN then we can say nothing that would lay the complete blame on to men. After all, we as women have birthed these men. More and more of us are single mothers with careers or working 4 jobs to support our fatherless children. We may have been abandoned but now our acceptance of this abandonment has created very strong, creative, lonely Amazons with spite. Now what is the response of males to this new age? Some men are in constant struggle to be the man they were taught to be or thought they should be when engaging with women. They want to be a gentleman, the hunter-gatherer, the protector, and the builder. How many of us women are dismissing this? How many of us women are looking at these same men we used to dream about marrying when we were young girls and finding them boring? How many of us Amazon Woman (the male side of us remember) are looking for a "challenge" a "rival", someone to tame? These may of course be completely unconscious acts but we have to consider some of this as truth.

I am not here to debate which came first, the chicken or the egg. We could research history and find countless imbalances. I don't believe if we knew the ultimate costs to our female spirit would be want to reverse our society into a fully-operating matriarchal society. I also will look to men as well as women to change our downward spiral of the lack of male and female recognition.

In conclusion, as I could further this idea easily into several pages, I want to leave you with. We must decide as men and women who we want to be in our totality and not blame the partner for not being more than they are. If we cannot operate in balance or strive with all our might for that harmony, then we must be satisfied with being fragmented and live in modern day polygamy by intimately involve ourselves with only a fraction of a human being and seeking the attention from other fragmented individuals hoping this will satisfy each facet independently.

My prayer more myself and for you is pure balance and organic relationships that flourish in undying beauty and understanding.

Angela Siekman

THE INNER WORKINGS OF ONE JUICY WOMAN: Confession #1

2007-12-13T07:27:00.000-08:00

THE INNER WORKINGS OF ONE JUICY WOMAN: Confession #1

Confession #1

2007-08-24T16:44:00.000-07:00

i am
a
wanderlusting
differently
creative
figure
of a woman

lined by conviction
and convicted
over trust

existing
by
audacity

where
in light
i
once
moved

in
shadows
you
can
still
see
me
dance

now
abstinent
from my
passions
human
or
otherwise

find
me
standing
in the center
of
a
barefoot creased
map

drawn by time
leading
to
conflicting destinations

inside
possessing
passion for all

and

focus for none

with
the
feelings
neither to whither
nor to thrive

and

while that is written

paralyzed equally by the sensation of either

Sensitivity of Words (explicit)

2007-05-05T07:13:00.000-07:00

With all the talks going on in Hip Hop and beyond about the use of derogatory language, I've had some thoughts of my own on the subject.

One thing that came to mind was a conversation I had a few years ago with a friend of mine who is Haitian by ethnicity and French by Nationality. He said when someone has cursed at him in English such as "Fuck You", it had no meaning to him, leaving him no feeling about it, no reaction to it. That is because his first language is French. English was learned while living here in the States. He was involved in a huge music controversy years ago and many had a lot of derogatory and demeaning words for him in the English language.

It got me to thinking where we as human beings are trained early on to respond to certain words negatively or positively. My father liked to call me stupid quite frequently.I later learned that supposedly he was hoping it wohttp://www.blogger.com/post-create.g?blogID=34862369#uld make me try harder. Ehh, I just felt stupid or at least doubted myself more. Now I don't know anyone that would dare say that to me now nor would I feel anything because I know where the source of pain originated and know my own truth and intelligence. Some are not so fortunate to have that insight. Some have a reaction to every word you speak. Think about the pain they must have suffered at the voice of someone else's words.

Now have you ever had some one yell at you in an unfamiliar language? You may have reacted to the energy projected, but you most likely didn't have a reaction to the actual words because they were foreign to you. They remained meaningless.

I remembered being called a Bitch by someone that professed their love to me. I didn't have feeling about the word itself because I didn't grow up in an environment where it was ever used. I knew as a child it meant female dog and later to mean when someone threatened by a strong woman (like Barbara Streisand had been called a life time ago) would use the word. I grew to learn it was used to call out another man to mean wimpy, I suppose. But so does Pussy if it directed at a man, lol only the most powerful thing on earth to mean wimpy. That's a laugh. Make up your mind will you.

Now, Midget is a derogatory term in my family between my daughter and myself because the people who are referred to by themselves as "Little People" have said they don't like the term and feel it's demeaning. I will respect that and teach that to my child and the history behind it. So she has the information and lo and behold, she has been called this several times due to the fact, she is not only one to two years younger than her classmates in the same grade, she is also the shortest in her class year after year. She even heard a father of one of her friends refer to her as a Midget. That word has affected my daugther but with age and knowledge of self, she has removed the feeling and embraced her stature.

The rampant use of Bitch, Ho, N word, and so forth in music are not even being used as shock value in my opinion. Yes they are used nowadays by hungry artists (maybe starving) to insure the record deals because one is caught in the Instant Gratification of success world we currently live in. No one wants to live like the artist Jewel did with her mother living in a car and playing coffee houses for pocket change until......... No we are the American Idols, America's Next Top Model, the highest rated You Tube video. We are fast food drive thru at it's finest delivering to the airwaves stir and mix Rappers who can barely have a conversation let alone actually engage us with thought-provoking stories and self-analyzing messages. We have our Pop idols who all started with Disney (conspiracy here?) that don't actually sing live, just have their souls removed and a computer chip injected to lip sync off beat to another boy gets girl, boy loses girl and I'll be on Disney's latest preteen soap opera next week.

I love a good bump and grind, don't get me wrong. I have no motivation without music. I would even say my body is my instrument being a dancer and singer. But I am not one dimensional. I have many facets and enjoy many genres of music and I thank the Artists who have been bold, brave and unyielding to share their truth. I thank the producers who can make me pop my body all night long if I want to.

But in the end, for me respect is greater than fame. The journey is the truth, not the destination. We are sped up to the point that we are not in the driver's seat anymore. We are so scared to not be up to speed that we decided someone should be left up the driving. But this not true for many who live in other parts of the world. People do exist by slowing down, observing, and listening. There is a purpose in each one of us. We cannot be moved if we know who we are. Each of us is worth that time to take to heal and build, to see and experience, to yield in order to perserve integrity, and to breathe our truth for longetivity.

Call me whatcha like but I'm doing ME.
My hope is that you will know your own TRUTH and DO YOU because that is where you will find freedom.

WE ARE ALL RESTLESS STARS

2007-01-28T07:11:00.000-08:00

If any of you have had the opportunity to know me, you will notice that I have often stated, "We are all restless stars". As some of you may know, I named my daughter "Chan Dara" which translated means Moon and Star. This blog today is between you and the Universe.

I recently took a trip to our Griffith Park Observatory which is a world renowned observatory/planetarium located in Los Angeles that has just reopened after a long renovation period. The entire engineering project was quite impressive and I recommend anyone living in or visiting LA to go see it.

Griffith Observatory

One of my favorite exhibits was the display of elements that make up our universe. I was drawn spiritually to the exhibit and wanted to share a little bit about my life philosophy through the science you have probably learned back in school at some point.

I jotted down the information that the Observatory offered to explain:

"Everything around us contains material that was once part of a star. The cells in our bodies the air, we breathe, and the materials that make up the planets in our solar system are all linked to the stars through chemical elements."

"Hydrogen & Helium are the two most abundant elements. They were made in the Big Bang more than 13 billion years ago. Others like oxygen and Iron are created deep inside stars. Supernova explosions blast them into space and form even heavier elements, such as Gold & Uranium."

"Most of the stars and all of the planets you see came from materials cooked deep inside other stars. When those stars died their elements were scattered into space in gas and dust clouds."

"We too, are part of the cosmic recycling process. It began billions of years ago inside an ancient star. The calcium in our bones, iron in our blood and oxygen in our lungs were all created inside that long dead star."

"Elements are the building block of the Universe. Atoms are the basic units of elements. Most atoms are made up of three types of particles: protons, neutrons, and electrons. Every structure in the cosmos is made of atoms from many different elements."

So are we not all Stars? Do we not all have a desire to illuminate and have a place to shine in this vast universe? Is it not only in our spiritual makeup but also in our DNA? The moon dictates the ocean tide and for us as women our natural cycles. We are forever children born from the Universe. We are all brothers and sisters wanting to have our light shine in our corner of the world and for some the calling is to have our light reach far more distant space.

"We too, are part of the cosmic recycling process. It began billions of years ago inside an ancient star. The calcium in our bones, iron in our blood and oxygen in our lungs were all created inside that long dead star." I have been recently felt a deep impact from the passing of so many people who have touched my life and countless others for decades. I believe that it is a natural process that newer stars will soon shed their light so that the Universe continues to provide unlimited light and hope.

I feel I must address those feeling that other forces are keeping them from their happiness and success. When you are a child, you have less control over what happens to you. Too many of our children have had to look death in the face. Too many have been instilled with no hope of a future, and no worth placed upon them. And still, children are so much stronger than so many adults. They endure and preserve their presence on this earth against all odds. If their life is spared, they have infinite possibilities awaiting them. Take heart in knowing those who have passed have not left us. Scientists have concluded that energy does not die and I believe that the spirits of those who have moved on are still an infinite source energizing our Universe. Your child spirit may have suffered great tragedies. Maybe you were simply ignored. Maybe you had everything but had no discipline or structure. Maybe you endured poverty and abuse. But now you are grown. You are your own person but don't think there is not a child inside. Whatever we feel we did not receive as a child, it is now time to become our own parent and nurture and love that child still living within us all. Let her/him dance, laugh, celebrate, discover, be loved, love back. Let her/him shine.

The Universe is an unyielding provider. We do not have anything between it and our individual selves. You have an eternal connection and a royal position within this Universe. You are a Star and no one can keep you from shining. You must erase the lies that have been recorded in your mind by parents, culture, traditions, history or others' prejudices because they are not of you. You have already been born a LIGHT. Believe that you are LIGHT. Shine your light freely and share it freely. That light will show your path and that path is yours. No one else on the face of this earth has the power to keep from you, that which is your birthright. Go forth with the knowledge that your purpose is important to the Universal exchange. It is an exchange, therefore be useful to the Universe, your community, your loved ones. The world is round and we are all connected. Be aware, be involved, be giving and remain free. Your freedom was given before you stepped your tiny toes on to this earth. Live boldly, and truthfully. You are needed to complete the stunning display of all the restless stars. Look up and see YOURSELF.

Maybe

2006-10-19T07:21:00.000-07:00

If I could not see
maybe I would listen to you

If I could not hear
maybe I would see you

If I could not speak
maybe I would sign with you

If I could not move
maybe I would feel you

If I could turn inside out
maybe you would know me

Wanderlust Pt. 1

2006-10-16T14:42:00.000-07:00

Scents
awaken
sleeping
memories

Clouds
paint
sweet
futures
against
stormy
histories

Travels
create
paths
where
strangers
meet

Footprints
reveal
treasures
beneath
my
feet

Language
explains
nothing
lost
in
translation

Slow
dances
move
us
toward
interpretation

Music
sounds
the
yearning
in
hearts
that
hide

Dreams
reveal
our
truth
sleeping
inside

Winter Captive (Haiku)

2006-10-13T09:05:00.000-07:00

Winter Blues will once
Again send her to slumber
Dreaming until Spring

Ex-inspections

2006-10-12T17:35:00.000-07:00

Upon our meeting you mistook me for the sun

I hated to disappoint your expectations by sinking in the sea

I am jealous of the rain

It has less pressure to perform in the Spring

Alive

2006-10-11T15:31:00.000-07:00

All the things I have become. All the ways I have surrendered my beliefs... to the Tides that will forever wash away that which was never mine. I surrender to each new enveloping Wave so that my Vessel can be replenished in translucent Waters of Truth.

It is in Joy I dance unapologetically keeping close company with my Pain. And in Pain I keep sight of my deserving Joy.

The Wind sees to my ever-changing path lifting me in the times my feet stick to familiar ground.

The Sun urges my growth and from its Energy I fuel my Passions.

The Moon keeps watchful light over fluid dreams conceived and each will birth in its rightful time according to Her cycle.

Breathing rhythms of authenticity echoes the internal sound of my soul. Stretching through fear, moaning through loss to become Perfectly Undone.

My Voice whispers in the trees and hills and with the beauty in all living things as it longs to Sing in the perfect balance of Harmony.

I commune daily with Mother Earth as she is our first mother. From her unselfish womb we were once birthed Whole and where we will once again return as she will recognize and embrace Her Own.

Spirit un-caged will fly upon Freedom's wings. Unsung melodies soar mine to new heights Angels who took flight long before guide me to my Center.

For I am not from before but Alive in the Present and will not be later. It is in the Now that Truth will tell my Time.

Sleep speaks needing no translation

2006-10-09T10:06:00.000-07:00

I didn't have much sleep last night finding myself back up half the night reading and writing. I did go back to bed but once I woke, I just couldn't really wake up so I ended up sleeping the whole afternoon. The one dream that seemed to take the entire period of slumber was with myself boarding a plane in which the passengers would be able to jump out and skydive. I was so excited (In real life I have never done this). I boarded the plane only to be left out of the experience. Once voicing that I had not taken my turn, it was then too late because the plane had dropped too much altitude. The window of opportunity had passed. On each flight I was helping the others with their fears and securing their equipment. This happened three times before I awoke with no skydive of my own.

Though our dreams often taunt us with mysterious symbols to decipher, this one spoke very clearly to me.

Have You Any Dreams You'd Like to Sell?

2006-10-08T11:09:00.000-07:00

I begin to morph into a hibernator when summer decides to smell more like fall in August. My depression wraps around me like a 200-year-old quilt displaying in it's patches my travels, my passions, and life mapping scars. I embrace my depression because she is the only one who knows who I am during this season.

I meld to softness of slumber. Sleeping is always my refuge hindering thoughts that could paralyze me. When my head finds it's last impression in the center of my pillow, I can be surrounded by daytime repressions coming to life in a psychedelic trip-Angela in Wonderland.

This is where I can breathe and expand, fly and run. I can find my lover returning to me too late as he finds me kissing my favorite poet. I spiral down a dungeon within an ancient castle where many lost souls seek refuge; I look for a room where my spirit can hover and haunt. My favorite actor often comes and tells me bedtime stories in between white linen sheets. More often strangers take me to themselves and I surrender.

I may be chased by the unknown where I once could get a running start and flee in flight; my older soul runs and jumps hiding in tall buildings racing to empty elevators. Once I saw my own murder. I laid there stabbed and bludgeoned watching in disbelief. Most times I wake up comforted simply by being taken away from the conscious state. This morning the artist known as Prince showed his apparent adagio talents lifting me in air. Spinning me like a top he captivated his audience; once we came down, my eyes were his captors.

THE GREATEST SHOW EVER

2006-10-05T18:53:00.000-07:00

(originally written in First Person)
SHE has a confession. She is a nice girl but you are often STILL intimated by her. Funny the lack of sense you have to notice that SHE goes too far only to leave herself behind. NO is rarely a part of HER vocabulary unless it really means YES.

SHE is an illusionist because while she CARES for YOU, she can make HERSELF DISAPPEAR. SHE can prop up smoke and mirrors while nimble fingers are like a snake charmer to your MANHOOD on that magic carpet ride.

HER sexual techniques have you asking where is SHE really from (Venus, Mars, Pluto (nah that one got axed) You know she has TAKEN you way past ever leaving. SHE is the unique and fantastical. SHE is all YOUR dreams come true while hers simply HAUNT through shadows while you play your favorite game of CHARADES.

She is master of potions in CHEMICAL romance. BUT SHE is the one DRUNK from your consumption of her .

SHE is the Madonna, the Amazon, and your favorite COURTESAN but never your BOY. SHE serves and entertains ever translating your thoughts with the grinds and sways of her temptress CURVES. You can't see HER though because SHE wears a MASK and you have it painted CROSS your eyes so even when SHE takes it off to breathe or maybe to take a bow (as this IS JUST a performance) you applaud and grope like her biggest FAN thus far.

She has left the building and you think she will do an ENCORE

and she DOES.

Desert Mouth

2006-10-05T09:00:00.000-07:00

Dry, crackled earth woman
Thirst for rain
Sun her God

Her history a pocket souvenior
Death ceased dreams unrealized

Secrets an origami swan
Hope a hungry trick

Whore
she
is
his
fix

LETHAL COMBINATION

2006-10-05T08:42:00.000-07:00

Call and Response

All or nothing

I speak believing

More than enough

SINGLE BY CHOICE-MARRIAGE?

2006-09-25T17:05:00.000-07:00

Many of you (men) have asked me why is it that a pretty woman like me is still single? Let me start by saying it's not because men haven't tried to catch me. I think I have been in relationships more than I have actually dated if that's possible. When I was much younger, I would devote myself to one man for a long period of time. I am loyal that way. Though I found myself pretty consumed by tending to their needs and at the end, leaving no room for my own. To date, I've escaped 7 purposals of marriage. Okay so one was to give him a green card but all the rest were for death due us part.

Now that I'm grown, I don't look to the fantasy wedding which seems most ladies focus on once they show off the rock (I've been given a few). They then procede on master mining a wedding for a Queen with no thought if they are marrying their true King. I have yet to hear a woman talk about or make efforts for a long marriage with their significant other like they plan what flowers and style of bride's maids' dresses will be at their wedding.

I have reflected on my singleness more lately as I come into a new age chronologically and look back on my life. The truth is, I'm a big Flirt who has had the opportunity of having a performance career that has taken me to many parts of the world (more on that in another blog). I think about that if I was married, would I have been able to experience all the things I have? The truth is, I don't think so. I love men and most men wouldn't put up with my career nor my flirtatious relationships with others.(Note that I have never cheated in my relationships)

I am also a Bad Boy lover. If you love the Bad Boys, you should expect to have fun and leave the loyalty to the nice guys. I just haven't gotten to the point where a good guy excites me at the same level. Though I have had some generous men, good or bad. I have also had some abusive, narcissistic men who let me be their courtesan with no exchange. I thank them for this actually because I think of myself really as a modern day courtesan. I embrace this and live this where it will serve me best. I don't mean I sleep around. I mean men come to me for a comfort level and I serve them like their wives and girlfriends haven't. It's not about sex, it's about respect for their needs as a man. For some of them, this does not make me marriage material but the courtesan.

Observing the world around me, and seeing as history tends to repeat itself, it is obvious that there is a rise of women becoming single and single mothers by choice or by abandonment. I see the head of the matriarchal society rising as we were thousands of years ago on this earth. We will not see it but it could be that the next generations to follow might. It could be good-bye to the Patriarchal empires.

I think in this day in age, that it takes more commitment to stay together without a piece of paper. I am not down on marriage. I have much respect for those who commit and stay together through it all. But it does seem that marriage has become as frequent as dating.

At any rate, I have learned through being single to be whole as I am. I am not looking for anyone to "complete" me. Why would anyone want to be with anyone else that feels like half of a human being?

I'd love to hear from you!
What do you think? Do you still believe in marriage? Did you ever? Is your manhood reflected by whether you ever get married? Are you relieved that many of us women don't care about a piece of paper to keep you with us? Are you happily married or happily single/divorced? I would love to hear your comments.

A la prochaine,
Shala

THE ACT A HAIKU

2006-09-25T09:52:00.000-07:00

deception was caught
in the act below your waist
stuck between my thighs

Poetry-Untitled

2006-09-23T09:16:00.000-07:00

My passion seems to slither in the dark
breathing in crimson stained walls
surrounding blue colored memories
painting bared skin in purple ecstasy

WELCOME

2006-09-22T22:54:00.000-07:00

Thank you for stopping by. Let me introduce myself. Among other names, I've been termed a "Juicy Woman". What is a "juicy" woman you may ask? She is a woman who possesses much passion for life, love and the drive to make every experience meaningful and exquisite as often as possible.

There are many of us in your lives. We demand much of ourselves and often are emotionally led in experiencing life. Life is never dull with a Juicy Woman. Sensuous and deep, sensitive and caring, bold and electric, we will always have another layer to be peeled back exposing yet more light on our many facets.

I will be unfolding in front of you as you will read some of my life in the tragic and beautiful forms it shapes never to end as this is a journey in discovery always.

I hope that you will feel free to comment, ask questions, and be moved to make your life the exquisite existence it really is.

A la prochaine!

Just a thought

2006-09-22T16:48:00.000-07:00

I wonder if he knows the pleasure of a woman ready to come undone. Her eyes will soften, in her warm breath a deep sensual hummmmmm.

Just for Fun

2006-09-22T16:13:00.000-07:00

This is from a spoken word piece I have performed in the past that was once inspired by chocolate itself. I thought to leave it here for your amusement. Here is just an excerpt:

(slow tempo)
I know I shouldn't but when I feel crazy you look like you could calm some nerves.

I, I know I shouldn't but your aroma is drawing me in and I am feeling the need to-be-drawn.

Can't wait for that chemical reaction to your dark, creamy taste

Imagining your cream heating up the insides of my throat with the last tongue stroke.

So here's the dilemma, whether to un-dress you slow-ly to admire your long, wide hardness or to simply tear you apart with the swiftness of a hungry tigress.

I know, I know I shouldn't but I need that HIGH this time of the month and this has gone too far I mean, DAMN, why shouldnt I -you're only- a- chocolate bar

Okay, so there are other fabulous things I like to lick but thats between my man, these lips and, well...you get the drift.