Integr8ed Life

Michigan Adventure: Day 5

2013-06-05T08:04:00.001-05:00

Day 2 Michigan Adventure

2013-05-31T16:26:00.001-05:00

Day 1 Michigan Adventure

2013-05-31T16:24:00.000-05:00

Helping vs. Hurting Those in Need

2013-05-29T11:16:00.000-05:00

John Wesley said, “Do all the good you can. By all the means you can. In all the ways you can. In all the places you can. At all the times you can. To all the people you can. As long as ever you can.” Talk about social responsibility!

This morning I was reading something from Rick Warren and he said that we are not responsible FOR people but we are responsible TO people. This got me thinking about ways in which I have tried to be responsible TO people - helping them in any way I can. The challenge is to find the balance between doing things for people and expecting them to do it all for themselves.

As a white, middle-class, American man, I am a member of undoubtedly the most privileged class in the world and with that come a great deal of responsibility. I’m amazed at how many people I encounter who believe that they are a product of their own hard work and don’t understand why people are struggling in this world. They are the cynics and would fall into the, “do it for yourself” category.

Then there are those who are the bleeding heart, mercy-minded people who, if the truth be told are probably more co-dependent than caring and compassionate. Those who believe that the poor need them are not doing anyone any good.

If your definition of poverty is defined by physical, emotional or spiritual lack then helping people depends on your ability to provide these things. Unfortunately when we try to provide for these deficiencies we only compound the problem. Poverty is about lack of relationships; access to people who are a voice for their plight. The lack of physical, emotional and spiritual things is only a product or fruit of lacking relationships that can reconcile people to themselves, their neighbor, their Creator and to all of creation.

When it comes to helping people, the key is in relationship. Personally, I am very reluctant to give anything to anyone with whom I don’t have some sort of relationship or affinity. I am much more likely to pay my friend’s electric bill than I am to drop money into a bucket of a man collecting funds for some cause at an intersection.

Here are a few questions that I ask myself before I jump in to “help” someone:

How well do I know this person; do I know someone who knows them?
Is my, “helping” giving them a hand up or a hand out?
Is this person taking personal responsibility to overcome their circumstances?
What is the best use of my social, emotional, financial, spiritual capital in helping this person?
Am I giving out of pity or because I see myself as a partner in their plight?
If I don’t have what it takes to help them do I know someone who does?

It’s amazing how differently we look at people who are caught up in the cycles of poverty once we put a name to their face and we are personally invested in their lives. What are ways they you are helping those around you? You might be surprised at how many people are in need who live right down the street.

A Life Worth Memorializing: Living Courageously

2013-05-28T10:27:00.000-05:00

Why do we memorialize people and events? It’s the day after Memorial Day and we, as the United States of America have dedicated a day to remembering all of those who have given their lives to protect the freedoms of which we are the beneficiaries. But why is it necessary?

I spent quite a bit of time driving back to Chicago yesterday and drove through quite a number of small towns. Most of them had a park or plaza with a monument dedicated to something, a statue or bust of someone. There were lots of cemeteries with American flags, headstones and mausoleums; buildings and public places were named after people, but why?

My thought is that we want to honor those who have left a positive legacy and we never want to forget those who have left a negative one. We are surrounded by reminders of the people who have gone before us because quite frankly, humankind has a very short memory.

Throughout history we have repeated cycles of atrocities because we didn't learn from the past. We forgot what we were supposed to do to break these cycles of destruction and we forgot the people who inspired us to be better as well as those who demonstrated the depths of human depravity.

We are surrounded by reminders of where we've been, where we want to go and who we want to be. A tour through any nation’s capital is filled with reminders of that nation’s history, just as digging through an attic or basement in most of our homes would be.

My grandfather recently died and while helping my grandmother move out of their home I was amazed at the things that she put the highest value on at her yard sale. They weren't the things that actually had the highest value, they were the things that SHE valued the most; the things that had high sentimental value because I’m sure she really didn't want to see them go.

We cling to things because we never want to forget. God understood this. That’s why he allowed the Israelites to go through the wilderness for 40 years. He never wanted his people to forget His faithfulness. Jesus also understood this. He told his disciples to break bread and drink wine in remembrance of Him; for his sacrifice for them and for all humanity.

We have to be intentional if we are going to remember the past; to learn from those who have gone before us and to honor them and what they taught us about living courageously. It is certainly my life’s ambition to live a life that inspires this and future generations and I hope that it is yours as well.

Increase Your Quality of Life: Live Simply!

2013-05-23T11:49:00.003-05:00

It’s amazing to me the stuff that I accumulate. Of course I don’t even notice until I’m are in some kind of transition, i.e. moving, renovating, organizing, etc. Where does this stuff come from and why do I have it? After a while I start to feel a little overwhelmed with managing it all; where to put it, how to maintain it; keeping it clean, remembering that I have it! It’s crazy making.

I happen to be in one of those places right now, hence the inspiration for this post. I’m pretty sure that I’m not the only one who struggles with the, “space invaders”. The way that I look at it, the more that I can simplify my life, the higher the quality of life that I can live. Simplifying doesn’t necessarily mean eliminating but oftentimes that’s the best option.

Here are some ways that I’ve found to simplify my life and remove much of the self-inflicted stress that creeps in.

Simplifying “Stuff”: I find myself asking this question quite a bit these days, “Do I really need this?” It’s good to determine the difference between a need and a want. If I have clearly defined the goals that I have for my life, mentally, physically, spiritually, financially, relationally, etc. then I have a good foundation for deciding whether something will move me closer to or further away from those goals. For example, I want to read more so for me, purchasing a television and cable would probably lead to spending more time watching TV than reading.

Simplifying Finances: A good formula for simplifying your finances is to save 10% (or more), give 10% to God and never spend more than you have. Sometimes this is easier said than done but it can be done. Oftentimes this has more to do with how much we’ve extended ourselves with our house, cars and toys. How big of a house do we really need? How luxurious a car? Some studies found that Americans typically spend more than they save whereas the Chinese save about 30%, Germans 13% and Swiss 14%. Try paying cash; it hurts a little more than handing over a plastic credit card.

Simplifying Meals: Keep cooking simple and healthy! I rarely spend more than 30 minutes cooking a meal and really enjoy cooking. Preparing meals can be a bit stressful and eating out can be costly. Look online for healthy meals that are easy to prepare and that you can freeze and save for later.

Simplifying Health: Try committing to 5 minutes of exercise a day. You’ll be amazed at how much better you will feel if you get out for a walk, do push-ups, sit-ups, pull-ups or jumping jacks. Don’t smoke, drink in excess, take illicit drugs or abuse prescription medicine. Eat small, healthy snacks throughout the day and drink at least 2 to 3 liters of water to stay hydrated.

Simplify Relationships: Spend the most time with the people you love; who energize you and who help you be a better person. Don’t get too caught up in building social capital with virtual friends. Don’t entertain negative people. Life is too short.

There are so many things that need simplifying, I feel like I could go on forever, but I won’t. Maybe I’ll save them for another day. Do you have any suggestions for simplifying your life?

My Summer Adventure: Charlevoix, Michigan

2013-05-21T11:13:00.000-05:00

A lot has happened these past couple months which is why I have decided to join my family this summer in Charlevoix, Michigan. I see this as an exciting adventure and a unique opportunity to spend time with my parents helping them to get the studio / gallery in order.

For those of you who don’t know my story, I grew up in the beautiful city of Charlevoix nestled in among lakes, rivers, woods and hills. My parents started their business in November of 1974 and because of their incredible resourcefulness they have been able to do what they love to do for almost 40 years.

Of course course a lot has changed over the past 40 years and despite having gone digital almost 10 years ago there's still a dark room with all of the equipment and a basement filled with an assortment of what nots. Let’s just say it’s time to clean house.

So this summer I will be helping mom and dad get organized as well as start a few new initiatives. Of course I will keep you informed as things progress. My goal is to create a progress report that I can share with people and hopefully we’ll see lots of positive changes.
If you make it Charlevoix, Michigan this summer please stop by and see me at Aartvark Studio and Gallery - 413 Bridge Street. It’s one of the most beautiful places in the world.

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A New Adventure

2013-05-11T21:18:00.000-05:00

From very early on in my life I decided that I would view life as a great adventure; each day holding beautiful treasures in the form of people, places, experiences and opportunities. I realize that this is certainly not the most conventional path to take. Most of us are much more aligned with the one paved with upward mobility and security.

I hold no judgement against those who have chosen this path but I will present a challenge. Is there really such thing as absolute security? Can you count on having a job until you retire? Can you count being healthy the rest of your life? Can you count on your spouse to stay with you forever? Can you count on there being a tomorrow? These are all things that we put our faith in, but are they truly immutable or unchangeable?

I believe the answer to the question of whether we can find absolute security is yes, but it’s not found in our work, our investments or bank accounts, our health habits or our human relationships. True security can only be found in the eternal. So what does that mean?

My life’s journey has led me through a lot of uncertain times, but the one constant through it all was my faith in the Heavenly Father. The apostle Paul says in Philippians 4:12 & 13, “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” This is true security.

I’m off on a new adventure for a few months and I’m really not sure what to expect but one thing I am sure of, God is in control, he loves me and has a plan for my life. Stepping out in faith can be a terrifying experience and if you don’t agree then you’ve probably never truly trusted God with all that you are and everything you have. True security comes not from being safe, but trusting that no matter how violent the storm, He is with you throughout it all.

Of course I will keep you posted on how my journey of faith develops and I would ask you to pray for me to accomplish all that I have in my heart to do over the course of these next few months.

So what are you putting your faith in these days?

A Tribute to Mom: 5 gifts that molded my life

2013-05-09T08:46:00.000-05:00

With mother's day coming up (and my mom's birthday) I wanted to give a tribute to the woman who brought me into this world. This is not only a tribute but lessons I've learned from my mother on how to instill greatness in others.

My mother is the rock of our family; always consistent, steady, calm and collected. She is not a reactionary person; an example of clear mindedness and unflappable. This is the first and by far the most important thing a child needs:

1) Provide a safe environment that offers consistent love and discipline.

I distinctly remember the time that I started hanging out with a neighbor girl who was not a good influence on me. She taught me how to have an endless supply of chewing gum by peeling it off the sidewalk and recycling it. She also taught me a few colorful words. One day I thought I'd try out one of my colorful words on mom and we went straight into bathroom to taste a bar of soap.

I discovered there were much better words to express myself.

The second gift my mom nurtured in me was:

2) A sense of adventure and freedom to explore.

One significant memory that I have with my mom was when we lived in Germany and she and I were out in the back yard looking for snails. Mom wanted to try her hand at making Escargot. We looked under rocks and bushes and I was absolutely amazed when there, low and behold, was a snail. Mom always encouraged me to play outdoors, explore and expand my imagination.

The third gift mom gave me was:

3) A listening ear

I was picked on a lot as a kid and I remember going to bed and mom would sit in bed with me and listen to the stories of how kids pushed and punched me or screamed in my face. She never tried to solve my problems. She simply listened, acknowledged my pain and encouraged me.

The fourth gift that mom modeled for me was:

4) She never complained; she modeled servanthood.

My mom worked 6 days a week at the gallery that my parents started almost 40 years ago. After working all day she would come home, make a great meal and THEN clean up after the four boys (my dad included). She never complained about all the work she had to do. She loved us and served us,not as a martyr or a suffering servant. She simply loved us and served unconditionally. I am embarrassed today reflecting back on how little I contributed to our household as a boy.

The fifth gift that mom gave us was:

5) She was and is a woman of faith.

My mom was never one to take charge but when there was a leadership vacuum she would always step in. She led the women's group at church. She hosted Bible studies and fellowship groups at the house all of the time. She was the quiet, consistent leader and had the respect of anyone who knew her at church (and that was most people.)

My mom is the most beautiful woman in the world to me both inside and out. I don't mean to idealize her. She wasn't perfect, but pretty darn close. I love you mom and I want to thank you for the great sacrifice and investment that you made in me. I strive to be a son you can be proud of because of deep gratitude I have for all that you've done for me. Happy Mother's Day and Happy Birthday! You're the best!

Upside Down Economy: Living means dying to yourself

2013-05-08T12:32:00.000-05:00

It doesn’t make sense! To live you must first die, to be first you must be last; to be a great leader you must be a humble servant! Not only that, but the one who is saying all of these crazy things claims to be fully man and fully God. He is the God of the “both and.” How can I get my puny little brain around this?

I was first introduced to this concept by Father Richard Rohr, a Franciscan Priest who is a prolific writer, speaker the founder of the New Jerusalem Community in Cincinnati, Ohio. This concept of “both and” felt like it bordered on heresy. The whole notion that we could see on both sides of an issue and hold onto our opinions loosely, with grace and love, patiently processing and weighing the information seemed a little new agey.

I’m beginning to reevaluate this concept of the “both and” and here’s why; the paradox of the Trinity; the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. The Trinity is One yet three separate entities with three distinct roles. Well, maybe not that distinct but they are mentioned in the Scriptures at different times participating in the lives of people in different ways. The Trinity can be compared to the Body of Christ.

We are all special, individually created to offer something unique to the Body. Alone we are dysfunctional. That’s not to say we are nonfunctional. We can do things on our own but we were designed to contribute to the Global Community* as a reflection of God’s Kingdom here on earth. What does God’s Kingdom look like? Well, it’s loving; there are no divisions between, class, race, creed, color, gender or anything else for that matter. There is a lot of celebrating; i.e., singing, dancing, sharing, eating and drinking. There is no sickness, brokenness, disability or impediment. Everyone is in harmony with one another, with the animals and all of creation.

It’s my opinion that if we spent more time building God’s Kingdom here on earth (spiritually) and less time determining who’s right and who’s wrong; who’s going where and why we would live much more fulfilling and satisfying lives. Also, we would bring greater honor to the one who made us, who loves us and who told us that to the degree that we judge He would also judge us.

So what would it look like if you were to suspend judgement, listened and responded in love? How about we give it try!

*Global Community = The unified body of Christ throughout the world.

Envision Innovation: Effective Listening Workshop

2013-05-07T13:09:00.000-05:00

Let me introduce you to Beth Racine, a relational consultant at Envision Innovation. What is a relational consultant you ask? Well, let me tell you! Beth and her team “help businesses, churches, schools and families learn effective ways to strengthen relationships for immediate results and a lasting effect.” They provide workshops that address healthy communication whether it is in the context of parenting, marriage, the workplace or other relationships.

This past weekend I attended a workshop at their office entitled, Effective Listening. The objectives of this workshop were to, 1) Recognize listening habits that build and break down constructive communication and 2) Learn tools to be an effective listener.

I loved the format because the participants were divided into multiple table groups. The whole group listened to a brief training segment, then we participated in several short exercises that were discussed within our table groups and finally brought back for everyone to discuss.

Some of the areas that we addressed were to identify listening habits:

Are you a Squasher, an Encourager, a Realist, a Fixer, An Interrogator, a Defender, a Jokester, a Pacifier, a Storyteller or an Emotional Reactor?

What is the message we are sending when we respond to people in these ways?

The key to effective listening is acknowledgement; learning how to acknowledge people’s feelings takes training and a whole lot of practice. Beth and her team introduced us to a practical tool that is wrapped up in four steps.

1) Maintain your composure.

2) Recognize your response.

3) Acknowledge the person’s perspective.

4) Mean it; be sincere.

Having this information is like a road map. It can point you in the direction of where you want to go but the vehicle that helps you get there, becoming a great communicator comes with the help of organizations like Envision Innovations that can guide you on your journey and with lots of practical application.

If you’re interested in learning more about Beth Racine and Envision Innovations you can go to their website at: http://www.envision-innovation.com/ email them at: info@envision-innovation.com or call 224.520.8155. I’m sure they would be more than happy to answer any questions you may have.

Personal Growth: 8 Great Questions

2013-05-03T09:23:00.000-05:00

Here is a tool that a good friend of mine passed on to me that I use when I journal (most days). I found it to be a great way to inventory the trajectory of things in my life. Of course it’s not comprehensive but it’s a great place to start if you’re really serious about doing the work that we all need to do to become who we were designed to be and to live a more integra8ed life!

Eight questions:

What’s different?

What’s working?

What’s not working?

What is my state of mind?

What is my state of body?

What is my state of spirit?

What am I grateful for?

What is my intention for today?

Of course you don’t have to answer all of the questions every day but I find that it’s a great way for me to check in with myself. So how are you doing? Do you have tools to help you measure your heart, mind, spirit? Please share!

ProVision Network Introducing INVISION GLOBAL NETWORK

2013-05-02T18:15:00.003-05:00

From Thermometer to Thermostat: Becoming a Change Agent

2013-05-01T11:48:00.000-05:00

I had never heard the comparison between being a thermometer or a thermostat until listening to Seth Godin yesterday. After looking it up online I quickly realized that this is a topic that has been widely written about. Well, I liked it so much I thought I’d share thoughts as well (in case you missed the other comparisons).

Obviously the role of a thermometer is to determine the temperature of something. It fluctuates up and down with the environment. You can see where we’re going with this.

A thermostat on the other hand, regulates the environment. It is connected to the heating and cooling system and sends signals when it’s time to adjust the temperature.

Of course the question is, are you more like a thermometer or a thermostat? Do you passively adjust to your environment or do you control your environment?

As I was thinking further about this I came up with a few character traits that might help you determine whether you are more reactive or proactive.

The thermometer: Reactive

Victim of circumstance

Inability, unwilling or resistant to change

Disempowered

Lack guiding values and/or moral principles

Uncertain about making decisions

Maintain the status-quo

Follow the rules

Invisibility is preferred

Always choose safety over risk taking

The thermostat: Proactive

Agent for change

Influencer / leader

Take control

Strong value system

Vision for the ideal environment

Creative problem solver

Willing to change the rules

Success = risk

Can’t do it alone

Prepared to take action

I honestly don’t believe that most people want to live like thermometers. It’s fear that keeps us from experiencing the great adventure that life has to offer us. So how do we overcome our fears? Here are some tools that I’ve used that I hope will be helpful to you.

Train yourself to believe that failure is an important part of finding personal success.

Resource: Failing Forward by John C Maxwell

Video: http://youtu.be/1PXpASxzmQc (John Assaraf: How to Overcome Fear...)

Find out what you’re really afraid of and ask yourself these 4 questions.

1) Is what I’m telling myself really true?

2) Can I absolutely know that it is true and does it really matter?

3) How do I react? What happens when I believe this thought?

4) Who would I be without that thought?

Train yourself to manipulate those fearful thoughts by changing the way you experience them whether in your mind or your physical body.

Focus on the benefits of what your life will be like when you confront your fears rather than focus on the negative uncertain consequences like. pain, embarrassment, etc.

Remember that God is in control; give your fear over to the one who can be truly trusted.

If you have any additional thoughts or suggestions please share them. I found this video inspirational:

The Drama Circle: Victim, Villain, Hero or True Self?

2013-04-30T10:47:00.000-05:00

Have you ever felt like you were caught up in a cycle of hurt and frustration; feeling like no one understands you? Well, let me introduce you to a tool that that has revolutionized how I see myself and my relationships with others.

It’s called the “Drama Circle”, developed by Dr. Gay Hendricks, psychologist, counselor, professor, author and life coach. The drama circle identifies four different “states” or “roles” we tend to identify with. The goal is being our true self and our true self might be characterized by:

Self confidence
Healthy relationships; good communicator
Balanced; healthy mind, body and spirit
Sensitive / kind; aware of the people around you
Open to growth and new ideas
Responsible; do what you say
Congruent; transparent
Willing to take ownership of things
Ability to handle difficult circumstances; make decisions
Trusting
Connected to others

The next three roles we are often choose to cling onto hinder our ability to live in our, “true selves”. They are the Victim, the Villain and the Hero.

When we play the victim we feel we are powerless. We say things like, “If only...”, “I could never...” or “Someday...” As I think about a time when I played the victim I’m reminded that just this morning I was feeling sorry for myself. I don’t have the start-up capital that I need for a few ideas; other people were handed positions of leadership; other people have never had to struggle to make a living... Can you see what a victim I am! Well, that’s not the mindset of someone embracing their true self.

A villain tells people people what they can and cannot do. They want to be in control and commanding, generally in attack mode. They say things like, “You should...” or “If you would just...” or “Your problem is...” It saddens me to admit that I have spent a good portion of my adult life, “advising people” whether they wanted to be advised or not. An example being a villain or persecutor was when my friend wanted to join a church that was heavily into titles and she likes titles. Well, of course I thought it was a ridiculous idea and I really took her to task. I didn’t listen. I didn’t have an open mind. I had my ideas and she was going to hear them. What a jerk! That’s a villain.

Finally there is the hero. This is the martyr, the enabler, the co-dependent type who tell themselves that, “This person just couldn’t live without me.” This is a very toxic place to be because it prevents both the hero and the victim from moving towards their true self.

don’t tend to be the hero but I do remember a time, not too long ago when I ended up getting a little bent out of shape over the fact that I was always doing the dishes. Initially it was my gift and my contribution to the group. I was the silent servant, suffering and toiling away in the kitchen as my friends enjoyed deep meaningful conversation as they sipped wine in the living room. Eventually my, “servant heart” had enough and my response to my friends came out a little sideways.

What I learned from that incident was to simply ask for the things I want. That was a huge lesson that has carried over all aspects of my life. I can more fully embrace who God created me to be by not playing the victim, the villain or the hero. I can create healthy boundaries and daily strive to live in my true self.
Does your life reflect the attributes of someone living their true self? Which of these do you find yourself struggle most with? Please let me know.

Here is a link to a great article that shares more about this topic: http://www.marleneandbob.com/Personas.pdf

Jason Jaggard - Spark Good

2013-04-29T14:00:00.000-05:00

Last night I participated in the last of 5 Spark Group meetings. Spark Groups are simply weekly gatherings with friends, neighbors, co-workers, etc. and revolve around a desire to do something each week for 5 weeks that will make the world a better place.

People in our group reconnected with estranged family members, reached out to struggling friends and neighbors, and did a whole host of random acts of kindness that not only blessed the lives of those they helped, they found it to be very refreshing and fulfilling for their own lives. What an amazing concept! Actually, I don't think it's all that original. Some wise person once said, "Do to others that you would want them to do for you". Well, I guess that what we did and it felt great!

After the meeting I had the opportunity to meet the founder of Spark Good, Jason Jaggard. In his own words Spark Good was started because,

“We believe that human beings were designed to be extraordinary - that life was meant to be an exploration with others into discovering our God-given gifts and talents and unleashing them to serve whatever community we find ourselves in. Yet living an extraordinary life never happens on accident. It requires intentionality. It has to be chosen.”

Jason is very engaging and passionate about helping people move forward in who they were meant to become, “one small risk at a time.” We share this passion and for that reason I thought I’d introduce him to you.

If you want more information about Spark Groups, just go to www.SparkGood.com and there you will find all kinds of great resources.

Here’s a video of Jason sharing about Spark Good.

Doing "The Work": Perception Deception

2013-04-28T07:50:00.002-05:00

I love to spend time around people committed to personal growth and health whether it’s spiritual, emotional, mental or physical. Often times we’ll share resources that can be truly life changing. Since I found some of these tools and applications life changing I thought that I’d share them with you!

One of the most helpful tools that I learned this past year is an exercise that Byron Katie has developed. She calls it, “The Work” and essentially, “The Work” is suspending your judgments and perceptions (or misperceptions) about things and asking yourself these four questions.

Is it true?

Can I absolutely know that it is true or, better yet, does it matter if it’s true?

How do I react? What happens when I believe this thought?

Who would I be without that thought?

So, for example, if I’m having a conversation with someone that I respect and they seem distracted or uninterested (This recently happened to me.) I might think, “This person doesn’t really like me.” or “Someone said something to them that changed their opinion of me.” This is where the four questions come into play. After our brief conversation I was feeling a little insecure and I asked myself, “Is it true that Bob doesn’t really like me?” “Can I know for sure that he doesn’t?” If I choose to believe this thought it will only make me more insecure and awkward around Bob. If I choose to believe that Bob had a lot on his mind and it had nothing to do with me then I can be sympathetic with Bob.

The way that I handled this situation was that I sent “Bob” an email when I got home and let him know that I noticed he seemed very distracted and a little anxious while we were talking. I wanted to make sure that everything was OK and that I was able to sympathize with all of the pressure that he must experience in his current position at work. He responded kindly and with great appreciation and It was confirmed for me that our conversation had nothing to do with me.

I’m amazed at how often we ascribe to the silliest of things to ourselves, but we need to remember that everyone is doing the same thing and a great way to become more emotionally intelligent (and integr8ed) is to ask ourselves these four questions.

Is it true?

Can I absolutely know that it is true or, better yet, does it matter if it’s true?

How do I react? What happens when I believe this thought?

Who would I be without that thought?

I hope that you find this as helpful as it been to me. Please let me know what you think. Post a comment below.

The Power of a Personal Mission Statement

2013-04-27T13:36:00.001-05:00

A personal mission statement is a powerful thing. It helps guide your life; makes it more integra8ed! How often have we made seemingly small choices that had a significant impact on us down the road (both good and bad). A personal mission statement can help keep our lives congruent. Who you want to be, what you want to do, what you want to have are not easy to accomplish without stated values that keep you true to being you!

I’ve been going through a very intense time of evaluating my life; the who, what, where, when, how and why. I’ve had various personal mission statements but I think I’ve finally landed on one that I can stick to. My who is to be a catalyst, a challenger, an “activator” for good. I have always loved helping people. When I traveled through Europe, I would be constantly stopping to help other travelers to help them get to where they were going even if I didn’t know myself. I figured two heads were always better than one and of course I could also make a new friend!

So my new mission statement is: “I exist to create value in the world around me by identifying and addressing needs, fostering love, community and personal responsibility.” Ok, so I’ve got the helping people thing in there, love (agape/unconditional love) is always good; community - our connection with all of humanity and personal responsibility which, for me addresses the whole person, mind, body and spirit; our responsibility to take care of ourselves, others and God’s beautiful earth. And the only reason I included “personal” is when it comes to responsibility, it’s easy to think it’s someone elses. It’s my belief that if I’m going to help make the world a better place then it has to has to start with me.

If you don’t have a personal mission statement, here are some tools that I used to develop mine:

As you reflect on your past, what moved or stirred you? What brought you great joy and fulfillment? When were you at your best?

This will help you figure out what you NEED to be doing to feel alive.

What are your values? Here is a list from www.SelfCounseling.com but this is in no way an extensive list. You can find many more values if you simply search online.

Achievement	Friendships	Physical challenge
Advancement & promotion	Growth	Pleasure
Adventure	Having a family	Power and authority
Affection (love and caring)	Helping other people	Privacy
Arts	Helping society	Public service
Challenging problems	Honesty	Purity
Change and variety	Independence	Quality
Close relationships	Influencing others	Quality relationships
Community	Inner harmony	Recognition
Competence	Integrity	Religion
Competition	Intellectual status	Reputation
Cooperation	Involvement	Responsibility accountability
Country	Job tranquility	Security
Creativity	Knowledge	Self-Respect
Decisiveness	Leadership	Serenity
Democracy	Location	Sophistication
Ecological awareness	Loyalty	Stability
Economic security	Market position	Status
Effectiveness	Meaningful work	Supervising others
Efficiency	Merit	Time freedom
Ethical practice	Money	Truth
Excellence	Nature	Wealth
Excitement	Honesty	Wisdom
Fame	Order / Stability	Work under pressure
Fast living	Personal development	Work with others
Financial gain	Freedom	Working alone

Think about ways that you want to make a difference in the world. What do you want your legacy or unique contribution to be?

How is it that you are going to accomplish your goal of making it a better place? Think about what you need to do to be able to sustain this mission.

Having a personal mission statement doesn’t mean that you won’t make bad choices in the future but it certainly makes it a little easier when you have something to measure your decisions against.

Please let me know if you have any additional suggestions! Thanks so much

Do's and Don'ts When You're Stuck

2013-04-26T15:30:00.000-05:00

10 things to do when you don’t know what to do.

Take a walk

Call a friend

Read, listen, watch something inspirational

Write thank you notes

Make a to-do list, prioritize it and start on the first thing

Journal

Go to the library

Eat some veggies

Go to the gym

Clean out your closets and donate it all to charity

10 things not to do when you don’t know what to do.

Snack on junk food

Channel surf

Drink alcohol or do drugs

Shop online

Do other things online.... You know what I’m talking about

Play video games for more than an hour

Entertain unhealthy thoughts that lead to unhealthy things

Spend hours on Facebook

Sit at home alone feeling like no one loves you

Don’t pick your nose or bellybutton (that’s dumb but I couldn’t think of another one.)

The inspiration for this blog post was that I was doing most of the things on the, “What not to” list so I thought I’d try to inspire myself. I did get some cool stuff for my camera though!

Can you think of any more additions to that can be made to these lists?

Getting from Here to There

2013-04-24T13:44:00.000-05:00

This morning I was listening to motivational guru, Tony Robbins and I even though I don’t ascribe to the power of self for change, I do believe that faith-filled people can benefit some of the principles that are taught by the self-help advocates.

The steps that Tony laid out for reaching your goals are:

Get clear on what you want. This speaks to desired outcomes in life. This reminds of the adage, “If you aim at nothing you’ll hit it every time.” This to me, getting clarity about life and destiny directly correlates with our faith: “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Heb. 11:1. A vision needs to clear, concise and filled with faith. If it’s not then it’s too small.

Take action. This means put your faith before your fears. I recently read recently (I think it was Brian Souza who said) that on the other side of fear is where living can be found. Why do we so often allow fear hinder us from living the lives that we dream of having? We need to take action, even if they are small steps each day to get through our fears and experience successes that move us towards actualizing our dreams.

Measure your results; know what you are getting. Someone once said that the definition of insanity is continuing to do the same thing and expecting different results. If we aren’t measuring our progress then we’ll never know what or why the things we’re doing are getting us to where we want to be.

Make adjustments or course corrections. I heard it said that airplanes are off course 90% of the time so the need to constantly be making course corrections in order to get to their destination. I think this is a common problem for many of us. We’ve tried this, that or the other thing and it just didn’t work so we gave up and returned to living, “safe” instead of by faith and persistence.

I think what really hit home for me was determining the “what”. My life tends to be more about the “who”; about being and less about doing, but what I’m realizing is the importance of having a clear picture of who I want to be, what I want to do, what I want to have and why. Once there’s clarity, then we can take action, measure our results and finally make the adjustments that we need to become the people we were created to be and have the impact that we were intended to have.

What are your thought about this process?

My Manifesto: Credos to live by.

2013-04-23T10:06:00.003-05:00

This morning I was listening to Seth Godin’s "Tribes" and one of his challenges was to publish a manifesto. According to dictionary.com a manifesto is a public declaration of intentions, opinions, objectives, or motives, as one issued by a government, sovereign, or organization. Well, this manifesto is actually personal; it the way that I would like to live my life and I want to surround myself with people who also embrace these credos. So here it is. My manifesto is to:

Live by faith not by fear.
Love people without judgments or conditions.
Let gratitude be the constant expression of your life.
Never stop learning, growing, creating.
Lead by example
Be transparent - Keep it real!
Commit to living in community; invest in others and let them invest in you!
Live with sustainability in mind; now and for the future.
Take responsibility for change starting with yourself.
Create value wherever you go.
Listen with the sincere intent to understand.
Remember that it’s the small choices that make the big difference.

This is certainly not an extensive list of credos for my life but I think that it’s a good start and of course I can always evaluate and adjust it as I draw closer to becoming the person I believe I was created to be.
Do you or your organization have a manifesto or credos? Please share them because they might offer inspiration to anyone reading this. Thanks!

This is Seth Godin's TED Talk on, "The Tribes We Lead".

Packing seeds for families in need!

2013-04-22T13:20:00.000-05:00

Yesterday I was honored to be a part of a volunteer seed packing program through Willow Creek Community Church that will benefit families in Zimbabwe, Africa. It was inspiring to see families from all walks of life come together for the common purpose of serving those in need; people who are hungry and often lack hope. The seed packets that were assembled can provide a response to both. Thank you section 103F 9am for packing close to 20,000 seed packs. Way to go!

Discovery: Living an Adventure!

2013-04-19T11:19:00.003-05:00

Discovery: “The traveler was active; he went strenuously in search of people, of adventure, of experience. The tourist is passive; he expects interesting things to happen to him. He goes 'sight-seeing.'” Daniel J. Boorstin

Are you a traveler or a sight-seer? I love this analogy because it speaks so perfectly to the 8th value of being integr8ed, which is DISCOVERY! Helen Keller said that life is an adventure or it is nothing. Do you feel that way? Is life an adventure for you or are you caught up in the monotonous and mundane?

Very early in my life I made a promise to myself that if I woke up in the morning feeling unfulfilled, unmotivated or uninspired with what I had to do that day, I would take a close look at why and then make every effort to change it. I have been true to that promise every day since.

Most people ask, “but how can I live the great adventure when I have bills to pay, mouths to feed and responsibilities to live up to?” I believe that it’s less about what you are doing and more about how you perceive what you are doing. Some people call this, “reframing”. So instead of feeling like a victim of circumstance, we can reframe things in a way that minimizes the bad and enlarges the good. This, in part, takes us back to having a gratitude adjustment.

What are we grateful for and enjoy about our work? Spend more time focusing on that. Seth Godin talks about how we should be focused on offering our art to the world, our unique contribution; that which we really enjoy doing. If you can’t find even the remotest way to express your, “art” where you are, then maybe it’s time to develop a plan to find a place where you can.

What would your life look like if you were doing exactly what you were designed to do. Oprah Winfrey said, “The biggest adventure you can take is to live the life of your dreams.” Are you living a life of discovery; learning, growing, being challenged and inspired? If not, why not? That can change today if you take action - create an adventure by taking the family to a homeless shelter, get to know your neighbors by inviting them over, ask your boss if you can start a personal project that you are passionate about, start writing that book! The opportunities for adventure are endless.

I love joining people on their adventures; in fact I on one right now. I’m house/pet sitting for a friend who is in Peru living his adventure. Let me know if I can help you live yours!

Education: Pathway to Change

2013-04-17T10:29:00.001-05:00

Education: the act or process of imparting or acquiring general knowledge, developing the powers of reasoning and judgment, and generally of preparing oneself or others intellectually for mature life. dictionary.reference.com/

What does, “mature life” mean? Perhaps it is taking responsibility for ourselves and the world in which we live; that we are constantly learning, growing and sharing that knowledge with others in the hopes of enhancing everyone’s quality of life.

Education is a vital component of “maturing” and creating any kind of change. If people don’t understand or realize the consequences of their actions, it is very unlikely they will ever change. We see education as information that people can use to make informed decisions; whether that’s knowing what is in our food, how people and animals are being treated in relation to the products we buy or maybe it’s just knowing how to access information.

An important distinction about education is that “Information doesn’t change the world, people do; with their ideas, with their knowledge.” Oscar Berg Obviously the internet has created an endless amount of information, but it’s not necessarily the information that impacts people. I learned how to read, write and do ‘rithmatic but I don’t think it changed me. It was the people who were passionate about the subject matter, congruent and transparent that made the biggest impression on me.

Education really only leaves it’s mark when it inspires change; change in the way we see the world, how we act, how we think. In what ways can you inspire those around you with the knowledge you have acquired throughout your life? Share something today that has improved your quality of life significantly.

Infinity: Cycle of Life

2013-04-16T10:36:00.001-05:00

The infinity symbol can also be represented by the figure eight because of its continuous, perpetual path. This is my world view. We are all interconnected; humanity, creation and the Creator and we have a choice to join in the positive, life giving energy of the Creator/God or to strike out to find our own path, generated from our own energy.

Regardless of whether or not we join the Creator in His plan or strike out on our own, our lives will have some element of impacting the infinity loop. The impact of our lives corresponds with how much and the type of energy that we generate.

So, in the best case scenario, we work real hard, we help some people along the way and we die. Our legacy is what turns the corner and returns to the world of the living. If we helped more than we hurt; gave more than we took, loved more than we feared than there might be a chance that a positive cycle will be perpetuated. But if the opposite is true then our legacy or the impact of our lives will perpetuate negative cycles.

When we join God and His plan then we are contributing to something much larger than ourselves. As we learn to trust His plan then His strength and energy grows in us and positively impacts those around us.

All of this might sound a bit mystical but here is another way to put it. I believe that we are all born into this world with the seed of the Creator inside of us. As we grow and become more self-aware, we long for connection, purpose; to make a positive contribution. The Creator seed can only grow once we die to ourselves and the Creator seed is the key to connection to Him, others and all of creation.

What do you think about the idea of the Creator seed? Does it make sense that we first need to die in order to live?