The Likeability Blog

Expectations

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 23:09:00 +0000

Setting expectations is wildly important for everything.

The Employer to the Employee...
The Employee to the Employer...
The Sales Person to the Client...
The Client to the Sales Person...

You name the relationship and setting expectations is at the core of making it successful.

If you don't know what someone is expecting, how can you possibly satisfy them?

If your customers and clients don't understand how you will interact with them, how could they possibly understand when you don't call them back immediately?

If the employee does not understand exactly what is expected of them, how can they effectively prioritze their time?

If the Employer does not understand how the employee will be completing their job tasks, how can they feel comfortable when or if it will be done?

Setting proper expectations is a fantastic way to get that "micro-managing" boss off your back. It is also a phenomenal way to get your employees to become far more productive.

Setting expectations will ease the panicked customers concerns, it will greatly reduce the amount of phone calls and emails you receive, and it will instill confidence that you can and will get the job done.

In many ways, setting expectations is the key to any relationship.

People fear the unknown. The unknown creates angst, tension, confusion, anger, and stress.

Setting proper expectations is like building a bridge that connects people. Without the bridge, people are left to wonder how they will cross the complicated and winding road.

It is absolutely necessary in any relationship setting, whether it is business or personal to have all parties clear on expectations.

Set the expectation and enjoy more success.

Curt Fletcher aka The Likeability Guy is a Real Estate Professional, Business Development Strategist, Published Author of the Book, "How To Sell More Homes and Increase Your Income,"Sales Trainer and Sales Manager.

Ethics, Sales and Business Relationships

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 22:47:00 +0000

Shortcuts taken to achieve sustainable business success will lead to future failure. The ONLY way to become a respected and long term successful business is through proper planning and unwavering ethics.

I was recently pursued by a small custom home builder to help them get off the ground and get the right systems in place. I met many times with the owner of this company in advance of my agreeing to work with him. Many promises were made.

What I soon learned, is that this guy had very little care for business ethics or respecting others. He had zero intention of allowing me to do any of the things we discussed, which led to a poor relationship.

Ethics are not optional in business or life. When commitments are made, they need to be kept. When parameters and expectations are relayed clearly, no wavering is allowed. This business owner believed only about the quickest way to make a buck and sadly it will lead to the destruction of his company.

There are too many people willing to to the right thing for their employees and customers for unethical business owners to be successful long term.

Attitude Equals Success

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Sun, 25 Sep 2011 18:37:00 +0000

How you feel about what you are doing and how you are doing it has a direct correlation on how successful that endeavor will ultimately be.

It's a cliche to say attitude equals altitude, but it is most definitely accurate. If you are in a suppressive and less positive environment, it can be difficult to maintain the attitude you need to be successful. While I am a big believer that you create your own success by not allowing others to impact your attitude, it can be a challenge in certain situations.

The truth is, you do ultimately create your own success, but that takes place by putting yourself in the right situations. If you have a boss that doesn't understand how their negativity and dark cloud attitude affects you and everyone else, it may be time to find a better opportunity.

Never feel that the situation you are in is the situation that you must stay in. Opportunity's are everywhere and never ending for those that have a great attitude. Keep your head high, stay true to your healthy attitude habits and success will soon be yours.

The Sales Script Dilemma

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Sun, 17 Jul 2011 21:42:00 +0000

Most home sales companies today employ some form of sales trainer. This sales trainer has a role of increasing sales for the company. This is typically accompanied by the sales trainer utilizing some form of selling script.

The idea behind the selling script makes sense. It is to give each and every sales person a tool or path to follow. During any given sales presentation, your potential buyer has their own agenda and it has nothing to do with your selling agenda. The sales script (if used properly) can help you stay on your path even when the client throws you curve balls.

The problem with the sales script and many new home sales trainers is they feel these sales scripts are the bible to more sales. They are not. When scripts are followed too closely they WILL become a very large detriment to gaining sales.

People are all different. Personalities vary. Their goals and desires are vastly changing at any given moment. When sales scripts are used for anything more than simple reminders to stay on your selling and questioning task, the sale will most often be lost.

The issue for new home sales companies is that they rarely trust ALL of their sales people to always be doing the right thing during a selling encounter. Therefore the implementation of the selling script for ALL employees. Then they video tape their sales people with secret home shoppers to make sure they are using the sales script. Not too motivating or effective to retaining gifted sales people.

I have a better idea. Hire only positive and motivated people. The talent pool is actually very rich these days, but you have to understand how to interview and hire good people. When you have a staff of only positive and motivated humans, no scripts are needed. No more managing to the weakest link will take place and selling will occur in large quantities.

Excuses or Solutions?

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Sat, 18 Jun 2011 20:35:00 +0000

Excuses are all the things that people say to make their inevitable failure seem acceptable. It is failing before starting. Excuses are nothing more than a crutch to allow people not to take responsibility for their own actions. Excuse based people never create solutions, because their mind is always looking for the easy out.

Solutions are all the things that people come up with to open the jumbled path of confusion and make it Crystal clear. Solution based people never make excuses, because their mind only thinks in terms of accomplishment. Failure is not an option.

Don't be a mediocre person that doesn't allow yourself a true chance at success. Stop making excuses and learn to see solutions at every turn. There is a solution to virtually all situations, but it may require you to make a difficult decision or to take a long look in the mirror. The choice of success is yours.

Curt Fletcher aka The Likeability Guy, is a Real Estate Professional, Business Development Strategist, Published Author of the Book "How To Sell More Homes and Increase Your Income," Sales Trainer and Sales Manager with Lillian Custom Homes.

The Training Paradox

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Fri, 17 Jun 2011 13:34:00 +0000

In sales, you often see those people that are fresh and new get off to a fast start. They are excited and don't know what they should be afraid of yet, so they set off with wild abandon and simply sell.

Then something funny happens...

They get training and information and then more training and more information. Then you look at their faces and the fresh excitement is washed away and replaced with confusion, doubt and fear of saying the wrong thing.

I wonder when or if companies and sales trainers will ever learn. Are they so arrogant they cannot see they create their own selling dilemma?

Sales is more about emotion, excitement and passion and less about knowledge and memorizing a sales presentation. YES, knowledge is important, but it is only important when it relates to what your client has a need for.

If you have excitement and passion, you WILL gain knowledge! That is simply how it works. Knowledge is best gained when discovered through passion and excitement NOT when it is force fed through a stagnant training class like it is the medicine for some disease.

Curt Fletcher aka The Likeability Guy, is a Real Estate Professional, Business Development Strategist, Published Author of the book, How To Sell More Homes and Increase Your Income," Sales Trainer and Sales Manager with Lillian Custom Homes.

Opportunity and Risk vs Status Quo and Safe

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Mon, 03 Jan 2011 15:03:00 +0000

I have long been a proponent of people taking calculated risks to improve situations and achieve dreams. People often shy away from such risks because the fear of failure has too strong of a hold on their life. But I wonder what the greater sadness is, risking failure by taking a chance on yourself to achieve your dreams or always playing it safe.

Everyone has goals and everyone has dreams. Some talk about them and some keep them hidden deep within themselves. But be assured everyone has them. If you are the type that keeps your goals and dreams hidden, stop it. Share them.

Tell people what you want to do. Lose the fear of someone else thinking you are silly because of your dream. Those that wish to squelch your dreams are not worthy of an opinion. People are either pulling for you or pushing against you. Decide who you want on your team and let all the others go.

Wouldn’t you rather gamble on yourself and take your shot rather than wake up one day towards the end of your life having lived a life full of regret and missed opportunities? Take a chance on yourself, you will be surprised how many people are rooting for you.

Curt Fletcher aka The Likeability Guy, is a Real Estate Professional, Business Development Strategist, Published Author of the book, "How To Sell More Homes and Increase Your Income," Sales Trainer, and REALTOR with Atrium Realty Group in North Texas.

Leadership

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Sun, 02 Jan 2011 23:41:00 +0000

Leadership is the missing ingredient in many management positions. Often the people placed in leadership roles in an organization are those who have simply been around the longest. Seniority, though, is not a substitute for effective leadership strategies.

Tough Decisions

Real leaders make hard decisions. Making the popular decision is not always the right decision. Colin Powell, one of the foremost leaders of this generation, says, "Trying to get everyone to like you is a sign of mediocrity: You'll avoid the tough decisions, you'll avoid confronting the people who need to be confronted, and you'll avoid offering differential rewards based on differential performance because some people might get upset."

Tough decisions are those that require confidence, because inevitably someone will not be happy with you. Fear of backlash should not concern you if you know the decision to be made is in the best interest of your people.

Challenge the Status Quo

Going with the flow is not what leaders do. Leaders challenge social norms, typical procedures, generic answers, and create new questions that outline new opportunities. When leaders hears the phrase, "We have always done it that way," they say "Why?" They desire a better result. Leaders don't understand or accept answers that have no substance, no valid reasoning, or opportunity for growth.

Leaders constantly look to challenge, tweak and change. They recognize opportunities and are curious to learn of new strategies that will test their current capabilities. They are pushing the envelope to facilitate a "better" way.

Personal Actions

General Douglas MacArthur, a great American leader, used to carry with him a list of questions to guide his journey. One such question, was, "Have I the calmness of voice and manner to inspire confidence, or am I inclined to irascibility and excitability?" This question gets right to the heart of leading by example. General MacArthur understood that to gain the support and trust of his subordinates, he had to carry himself accordingly. Leaders do not allow themselves to be drawn into situations that will impact their standing within their group.

Leaders carry themselves to a higher standard--a standard that inspires their people to want to excel and push themselves further then they thought they could go.

Action Plan and Training

Leadership is easy to explain, but harder to put into practice. Frankly, it is more about personal actions first and actual skill second. However, there are some useful items that can be practiced to try and improve leadership abilities.

Place people in the best possible positions to succeed. Evaluate your employees and team members and figure out what they do best and enjoy most. Situate them as closely as possible to align them with their strengths.
Allow your employers to make decisions. The transfer of empowerment is motivational and it's a great knowledge builder.
Create an atmosphere of excitement and happiness. While all work is not fun, people are more productive when they feel good about their situation.
Reward Excellence. When your people do something well or they consistently stop to help others, reward them and recognize their efforts. This provides a confidence boost and it delivers a firm message that you are valuable.
Be Positive. Challenges arise each day. Rather then look at challenges as problems, turn them into learning and growth opportunities for the team. Allow different people to be involved in the process.
Allow the free flow of ideas to be heard. Listen to your employees. Each day people have great new ideas, philosophy differences, and improvement suggestions. Foster an environment that allows this communication exchange to thrive. Just because someone has a lower tier job classification does not mean they have a lower tier brain. Use everyone on your team as a knowledge building opportunity.

Curt Fletcher aka The Likeability Guy, is a Real Estate Professional, Business Development Strategist, Published Author of the book, "How To Sell More Homes and Increase Your Income," Sales Trainer, and REALTOR with Atrium Realty Group in North Texas.

Goals and Simplicity

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Sat, 01 Jan 2011 19:21:00 +0000

A goal is really nothing more than an appointment you make for yourself. The key is not over-complicating the message. Keep it simple. Simplicity helps with clarity which leads to a higher percentage of success. As you train your mind to handle simple goals and experience more successful outcomes you can start incorporating more complex goals. Just don’t start that way.

It’s like exercise. If you are not a runner, would your first experience be the Boston Marathon? Obviously not. You start slow, develop, learn, grow, and THEN expand. Everyone wants immediate results and immediate growth, which most often leads to no action and no growth.

Get the thought of immediate satisfaction off of your mind. It is lazy thinking. It is entitlement thinking and it’s counterproductive to actual growth. Set yourself up for the best opportunity for success. Simple doesn’t mean easy. Simple just means clear. It means you have definitized the specific steps to take to obtain a specific result.

Goal Clarity

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Thu, 29 Jul 2010 11:52:00 +0000

Creating a goal is simply a way to define whatever it is that you are looking to accomplish. You know where you are today and you know the location you want to go. The Goal is what allows you to get to the destination. It is simply a map. When life gets confusing, your goals will keep you steady.

Define your goal-It MUST be precise.
Give yourself a DEFINITIVE timeline for achievement. This is a hard date that your goal WILL be achieved. No waffling or moving the date is allowed.
Break your goal down into tangible / workable phases.

If you want to lose 30 pounds in 4 months. Break this number down into monthly and weekly goals. That is 7.5 pounds per month or 1.875 pounds per week. What is more real, 30 pounds or 1.875?

Small rapid successes are absolutely necessary to keep you focused on your end goal.

POST your goal everywhere. It must be visible to be real. Write it down and place it where you will see it. Bathroom mirror, dashboard of car, computer at work. If you cannot see it, you cannot achieve it. Share your goal with others. This makes it real. It gives your goal credibility. Sharing your goal helps to make you feel accountable.

Faith and Opportunity

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Mon, 19 Jul 2010 11:39:00 +0000

Faith is a word that is extremely powerful. True faith only occurs when you believe with 100% of your heart and mind that your belief system is correct. Faith is when you make a decision that is not based on scientific evidence. Faith is most closely used when talking about religion, but it is also a large ingredient in allowing yourself to be successful.

When you have faith in yourself to achieve something, opportunity is not far behind. As you change your mind set to believe that you are destined for success, the world will start to reveal new opportunities all around you. Have faith in yourself and others will too.

What Happened to Job Titles?

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Mon, 29 Mar 2010 11:38:00 +0000

I remember when I could call a company and speak to a sales person, fly on a plane and be assisted by a stewardess and ask a secretary to help mail out letters. Today...not so much. Sales people are account executives, stewardesses are flight attendants and secretaries are executive assistants.

Seriously?

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for adding some spice to your title to make you and the customer feel better, but when does it stop? At what point are all job titles too inflated? Will we reach the level where all people are vice presidents, presidents, and engineers? Have we become so sensitive and PC that it's offensive to be called a sales guy?

The point of the job title is to allow others to understand who you are and what you do. If people at all companies are using the same generic spiced up titles, has the new title been diminished? Value has not been improved because you changed a title and respect will not be increased because your title makes you sound important.

If we have to inflate our job titles to generate a boost in confidence from the employee and the customer, could that be a sign that we have a much larger problem? Perhaps instead of working on the job title, we can focus on the person, the service, or the product. If you want to create a new job title, make it original.

When is the best time to buy a house?

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Thu, 04 Mar 2010 13:38:00 +0000

Truthfully, the best time to buy a house is when you are in need of something different. Your need doesn’t always mesh with interest rates, housing costs or other market conditions. While it is nice to receive perks such as an $8,000 dollar tax credit or a sub 5.00% interest rate that is not the major factor in a purchase decision.

Buying decisions are truly made based on emotion rather than facts and numbers. This is the reason people are not currently buying homes in droves. As far as interest rates, prices and perks, there truly has not been a better time to buy in recent memory. Home builders and Realtors alike are all pounding the same general message. They say,”don’t wait, buy now” and take advantage of all these great financial benefits.

I personally think our customers can see through the fog. People understand that with fewer homes being built and purchased, home builders and Realtors are pushing the over obvious message in an effort to create income and revenue. What this constant message preaching actually tells the customer is that you don’t care about their needs. They feel you are more concerned about making a buck, which actually makes people cynical of your motives.

What consumers really want has not changed just because there are different market conditions. Our customers still want to feel appreciated. They want to feel that you are helping them for selfless not selfish reasons. The truth is that our clients will always be willing to purchase a home when their true needs match up with your ability to help. When this happens with more frequency, consumers will once again enter the market in greater numbers.

My advice is to stop preaching the same message as everyone else about interest rates and tax credits. Be different. Focus on the client and center your questions and statements on your clients’ desires and changing needs. A Realtor becomes successful when they figure out how to help their client resolve the problems they have in their current situation. Forget about the market and all the other nonsense.

Curt Fletcher aka The Likeability Guy, is a Real Estate Professional, Business Development Strategist, Published Author of the book, "How To Sell More Homes and Increase Your Income," Sales Trainer, and REALTOR with Atrium Realty Group in North Texas.

Will the REAL Free Thinkers Please Stand Up

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Mon, 27 Jul 2009 15:19:00 +0000

"Where have you gone, Joe DiMaggio? A nation turns its lonely eyes to you..."

Simon and Garfunkel hit the nail on the head with this line. In today's world, we can substitute Joe DiMaggio for "Free Thinkers" or "Creative Thinkers." We have gotten stagnant, boring, and predictable as a country. There is very little challenge to the status quo and even fewer new thoughts being accepted.

The United States rose to power and significance due to the mentality as whole that there was no limit on our opportunity. People challenged the norms of society and persevered to change the entire landscape of human thinking.

There was no thinking that we had maxed out our potential. Original thinkers continued to push the envelope into developing new limits. They challenged theories and ideologues, which provided momentum into creating a more prosperous country.

Somewhere this has been either lost or postponed. We are in a mental rut as a country which in large part has contributed to our economy slipping a bit.

We need new ideas, new processes, and new optimism. People need to stop being so accepting of silly accepted norms. If you ever get an answer that sounds like "because that's the way we have always done it.."it's time to step up and challenge it.

Challenge does NOT mean confrontation. Challenge is providing a smart alternative to an old thought.

I challenge you to think more about making improvements then accepting anymore silly beliefs.

What would you like to change?

Curt Fletcher aka The Likeability Guy, is a Real Estate Professional, Business Development Strategist, Published Author of the book, “How To Sell More Homes and Increase Your Income,” Sales Trainer, and Professional Speaker that focuses on improving your Likeability to increase your Opportunities for Success!

How to Interview Prospective Employees

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Thu, 23 Jul 2009 11:22:00 +0000

When either starting a new business or maintaining a business, you must be able to bring in new talent and hire employees that will allow your company to thrive.

With a growing number of people to choose from, it is essential to have a firm understanding of how to hire quality people.

Attitude

The most crucial aspect of hiring is the attitude of that individual. You must hire people with an outstanding daily outlook--not false interview bravado, but true optimism. Most interviewees pretend to be someone they are not because they want the job, so you must be able to cut through the act and find the real person.

Do not simply read the applicant's resume and ask generic question about accomplishments she has or where she sees herself in five years. Be more thought-provoking to pull out something real.

Ask the applicant about what or who has been the biggest influence in his life and then find out the story why. When you ask why, just listen. This question is hard to fake an answer for. It will give you a glimpse deep inside someone to see who and what has shaped his personality.

Next, find out what the applicant feels is the greatest obstacle she has ever overcome. This can be related to prior work, but most likely it won't be. Figure out how she felt when this obstacle came into her life and how she came to the decision to overcome it. These are questions that require soul-searching; they elicit real answers from people.

The goal here is to not hire a generic person that can talk his way through an interview, but rather to hire a person who has a great outlook on life, who has human emotion, and cares deeply about the course of his life.

Desire

Desire is the second most important factor that should be looked at. If a person has a great attitude and a high level of desire to do well, that person will not lose and neither will you if she is on your team.

Desire can be determined a few ways, but asking where someone visualizes himself in a few years will rarely provide that information. Be blunt but polite. Ask the interviewee if he would like to have your job in the near future. If he says "Yes," that's actually a good thing. You don't want to hire people who are just satisfied with the status quo.

Good employees push other employees to improve themselves and they push their managers to challenge them with harder tasks and relevant actions. Ask the applicant what motivates her. Ask about the real reason.

For instance, money is not a true motivator; it is what an individual will do with that money that is the motivator. Similarly, power alone is not a motivator; it is the influence and change that can be implemented with a high-level position. If you get shallow reasons to these questions or you appear to have stumped someone, move along to the next applicant. You want good people, people with a great desire and a positive attitude.

Intelligence

Intelligence is the third item on the list. Most people have this prioritized first, but that won't yield the best results in most cases. Intelligence is simply when someone has learned some form of knowledge and they put that new knowledge into action.

This frequently happens when you hire someone with a great attitude and desire. Defining intelligence as simply performing well on a test or having a large vocabulary is misguided. Intelligence is about awareness, social consciousness, aptitude, desire for growth, and the will to continue learning all the time.

Inquire how often people read, what are they reading and why. What kind of hobbies does the interviewee have, and how often does she do it? Intelligence is also about a person understanding balance in life: family, work, and personal growth. Too much tilt into one area over another can be a strong indicator of a future problem.

Curt Fletcher aka The Likeability Guy, is a Real Estate Professional, Business Development Strategist, Published Author of the book, “How To Sell More Homes and Increase Your Income,” Sales Trainer, and Professional Speaker that focuses on improving your Likeability to increase your Opportunities for Success!

Are you the loud cell phone talker?

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Tue, 21 Jul 2009 02:38:00 +0000

Have you ever noticed that when people answer their cell phones in public, their voice suddenly raises several octaves?

Why do people feel the need to talk as though they are stuck in a wind tunnel and the only way to give the listener the most valuable of all information is to talk so loud as if their life depends on it?

This is something that has always confused me. It never fails, as soon as you walk into a store or a restaurant, someone will get a phone call and go from a normal inside talking voice to that of an obnoxious celebrity that needs to tell all their fans and paparazzi what is happening.

I think the public cell phone call makes the talker feel like they are starring in their own movie and all the people around them are just “extras” or “fans” getting a glimpse into your life.

Since you are the star of the movie, you have to “over” talk, make yourself sound WAY more important then you really are, or laugh louder than normal to entertain your audience.

It’s almost as if the cell phone gives people a feeling of importance and empowerment that otherwise doesn’t exist. The public phone call is your opportunity to “show off” your power, control, humor, stature, popularity, or any other role that is otherwise lacking in your normal daily life.

When the phone rings, your fifteen minutes of fame begins.

I’m going to burst your bubble just a little bit. It’s not fun to be an “extra” in someone else’s movie. It is actually really annoying and somewhat inconsiderate of others around you.

Now I have to admit, from time to time I have actually been entertained by the “I’m so important talker.” For some reason, I gain enjoyment from listening to people talk about how they are thinking about quitting their job and how their company will really miss their valuable input when they are gone, yada, yada, yada speak. Or my personal favorite is the “I’m gonna tell my boss off talker”.

This is always funny for me. I love the people that tell other people how they either told their boss off or that they are going to. I am willing to bet very few of those “telling your boss off” conversations ever really happen, so it always perks up my ears when I hear that kind of talk.

I realize that most of these conversations take place in more of a “blowing of steam” manner, but when they happen on the cell phone in public, they are always in the harsh factual power tone so their audience gets the impression they are a real force on their job. I think it is the ego boost that derives from other people hearing of your importance is the real reason for this kind of talk.

The thing about being the “loud cell phone talker guy” that impacts likeability is simple. You lose credibility when you talk “big” talk or you are obviously making yourself seem over important.

It really means that you may lack the internal confidence to not need this extra ego boost to always perform at a high level. Aside from that, you never know how is in your audience, perhaps it is someone that knows you or works with you. Maybe it is a manager at a company you would like to work for and you show up for an interview and they remember you as the annoying loud talker.

The best rule of thumb here is when your phone rings in a public setting, walk away from the majority of people and have your conversation somewhat privately. If you need to yell to have your listener hear you, get a new cell phone.

Curt Fletcher aka The Likeability Guy, is a Real Estate Professional, Business Development Strategist, Published Author of the book, “How To Sell More Homes and Increase Your Income,” Sales Trainer, and Professional Speaker that focuses on improving your Likeability to increase your Opportunities for Success!

It's called..."The Way it is"

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Thu, 16 Jul 2009 12:54:00 +0000

I bet I have the conversation at least once a day with someone that is upset, disappointed, annoyed, or just flat out depressed about some situation.

It could be that they didn't get the job they wanted, pay increase, bonus, present, discount, or whatever. In each situation, something seems to have gone wayward from what was either hoped for or expected.

Virtually every conversation stems from the fact the REAL result of a situation went poorly. Each time, the person dwells on the result for longer than necessary and it negatively affects a NEW future result.

Here is the simple fact:

It is what it is.

Whatever negative result that happened....already happened. It cannot be changed. The longer that situation is top of mind and affecting your attitude you will not be very productive.

That being said, here are a few tips to dealing with an unfortunate outcome:

If you didn't get the job you wanted, pay raise you were expecting, or promotion that you feel you deserve, ask why. Rather then take the news at a negative face value, take the opportunity to learn something. Perhaps there is something you need to improve or knowledge to be gained before taking on something you aren't really ready for.

If you are in a relationship with someone or attempting to date someone and you like them significantly more then they like you it can take an emotional toll. If over time, the situation has not improved, stop forcing it. It is what it is. Everybody isn't meant for everybody, no matter how much you try. Do yourself a giant emotional favor and end the attempted relationship and move on.

Lets say that you grew up with a less than stellar parent combination which led to some less then favorable growing up conditions. It happens. It happens with a lot of people. If you are over the age of eighteen, you are considered an adult. This means you control your life, mood, and situation. If you still dwell on "growing up" conditions from a parent beyond the age of thirty, you need to look within yourself to solve the problem...nobody else. Never blame your shortcomings as an adult on parental influences as a child.

Life is what it is. Time keeps moving and you can't look back...unless you are learning something. This does not include obsessive reminiscing, wishing you could "be back in a situation," or blaming others for your current level of unhappiness.

I challenge anyone that has these feelings to look inward, take TOTAL control of your life and emotional well being. Sometimes this takes help and guidance from another person to show you the way. When you ask for help, be certain you are ready to receive it, or the benefits will be fleeting at best.

Live in the moment and live for your future, the past is what it is and it's long gone.

Can You Change People...or Can People Only Change Themselves?

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Wed, 15 Jul 2009 13:00:00 +0000

I would be willing to bet at some point in everyone's life they tried unsuccessfully to change someone.

There are obviously many reasons to change another persons behavior some good and some bad.

The question here is, IF you can change another persons behavior. I say no.

However, you CAN influence the behavior of another in several ways.

Take away something that person desires.
Show that person (by example-not words) how you do certain things.

Give that person small rewards for certain improvements.

Never be an enabler.

Always behave in direct accordance to the message you speak about.

Do not be confrontational in a manner that you come across as "all knowing" or arrogant.

When explaining about "the change" speak about the benefits they will receive from making that change. Don't use the "just because" line of thinking.

Try some of these scenarios out next time you desire to change another person's behavioral patterns. When doing any of these remember to keep your approach genuine and calm if you want to receive the most beneficial results.

Curt Fletcher aka The Likeability Guy, is a Real Estate Professional, Business Development Strategist, Published Author of the book, "How To Sell More Homes and Increase Your Income," Sales Trainer, and Professional Speaker that focuses on improving your Likeability to increase your Opportunities for Success!

Don't Let Your Great Thoughts Disappear into the Idea Graveyard

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Tue, 14 Jul 2009 11:18:00 +0000

So you have all these great ideas and big future plans huh?

You write down your ideas, do just enough research to gain confirmation that the idea is in fact good. Then you start talking about your idea to others to gain even further confirmation that you might be on to something big.

Then it all fizzles into the idea graveyard...

What happened?

Most people fall short of actually implementing "the idea." They fall short not because the idea is bad or destined to fail. They fall short because they reach the stage of NOT having the "know-how" of completing the plan.

The easy way to end an idea is to say, "I didn't have the money for it," or "I didn't know how to do ________."

These are obstacles that virtually everyone encounters from time to time. Including the people that push forward and see their idea put into action.

Make a list:

Write down everyone you know (tier 1 friends).

Write down the people that those people know (tier 2 acquaintances and tier 3 never met before people).

Write down what all these people do / special skills.

Make a list of people (more then 1) that have skills in an area you need but don't have.

Call the people on the list, share your basic idea and see if they are willing to help.

If someone does not want to help, move to the next person on the list and ask them.

This is exactly how idea implementers move forward when they get stuck. As the idea person, you don't have to be able to do everything personally. You just need to know how to get everything done.

Save yourself a trip to the idea graveyard by making your list, speaking about your idea, then asking for assistance.

What great ideas do you have floating in your mind?

Likeability vs Normal

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 11:14:00 +0000

The conversation comes up from time to time about what the difference is between Likeable behavior and normal behavior.

For some people, they are one in the same, but for many they are substantially different.

Here is a list of some of the differences:

Likeability is opening doors for people. All people. It is holding a door for a couple extra seconds to allow someone to walk through it. It is being aware of other people around you. Normal is being oblivious to your surroundings. It is about letting the door you just opened close in the face of the person directly behind you. It is watching someone struggle with opening a door and doing nothing to help.

Likeability is introducing yourself to a new person on a job and making yourself available should they need it. Normal is being quiet and not offering assistance. Normal is the thought that, "I learned on my own, so can they."

Likeability is listening during a conversation and responding with something that directly correlates to what the other person is saying. Normal is waiting to speak during a conversation to make your statement. Your statement has nothing to do with the other person's comments.

Likeability is volunteering for something that other people don't want to do. Normal is waiting for someone else speak up.

Likeability is helping someone that needs help without regard to your personal advancement. Normal is offering to help another person if it leads to a better opportunity for you.

Likeability is being yourself and acting the same regardless of who may be listening. Normal is changing your personality dependant on who is in the same room and possibly paying attention.

Likeability is taking a personal risk to attempt to succeed at something you love. It is risking failure in attempt to succeed. Normal is always being "safe" and grinding out day after day in something that you dislike doing. It is never risking anything to take your shot.

Likeability is living your life in accordance to the same message you speak. Normal is talking about the right things and then actually doing something else.

Likeability is being able to "make fun" of your self when you make a mistake or screw something up. It is letting people laugh with you at your own expense. Normal is blaming your mistake on someone else and getting angry when someone tries to call you on it.

Likeability is not making excuses when things don't go as planned. It is about looking at a "one time" failure as an opportunity to learn and win next time. Normal is always making excuses when something goes bad, not learning anything from the experience and repeating the same action at a later time.

Prioritize your day and life

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 11:16:00 +0000

From time to time I am approached by someone that desires to "feel" better about their current situation. Often times, these are successful people in some aspect of their life, but still have a somewhat "hollow" or "empty" feeling.

Most often this feeling creates a sense of angst because they feel it shouldn't be there. After all, why would a successful and happy person with a great job and family ever feel this way?

Well, it isn't quite that simple. People are still people.

For whatever reason, a particular pattern emerges in many people that are busy.

Over inflated feeling of importance on a particular task.

Less delegation of work duties due to feeling that only you can do something right.

More time spent at work and thinking about work.

Feeling distracted when you are trying to relax or spending time with family.

Becoming a poor listener, because you are distracted by your own problems.

The perception of you by others becomes that of not caring or thinking you are better then someone else.

You become slightly withdrawn and disconnected.

This cycle then begins to continue as you can't seem to get out of the funk.

How to get out of this cycle:

Delegate specific job tasks: You may be responsible for the overall outcome of a project, but that doesn't mean each detail must be personally handled by you.

Set up evaluation points: Depending on the length of a particular project, set aside time so that you and the the person / people working on each task can discuss how it is going.

Improve listening skills: During the course of any conversation, listen to the other person. Instead of focusing on your next job duty or the next thing you want to say, simply listen to what the other person is saying. You "prove" your listening when your responses are in tune with the other person's questions or statements.

Prioritize your life: While people have many interests at any given time, the time spent doing and thinking about them need to be clear in your mind. This is work, family, and recreation. When this prioritization gets out of whack, you know it internally because you are either disconnected at work, home, or in your hobbies. There is a balance.

What this improves:

The people you interact with will enjoy their time spent with you. Nobody enjoys feeling like they are playing 2nd fiddle to your thoughts. When you are distracted....everyone knows it and they feel it. Doing this on occasion is normal, doing this all the time is annoying.

You will see that you have more free time. Delegation of duties is true leadership. It empowers another person, it shows trust and confidence, and it will free up your time. If you feel you have to do everything because quality of work will suffer, then re-evaluating your employees may be in order.

Quality of family time will greatly improve. Family time is not work time. Don't focus on work when with them. Remember, once time passes, you can't get it back. Not many people speak of wishing they spent more time working and less time with family when they are dying.

Free flowing thoughts will once again emerge. When you allow yourself to be unburdened with unnecessary stress, your mind enjoys it. You will regain your creative thinking and get much better sleep.

More time means more relaxation. Nobody can operate at a high level all the time. It is absolutely necessary to step back from time to time (regularly) and free yourself from everyday life. Do something you enjoy. Read, write, play golf, go to a movie, whatever it is, go and do it. Don't feel bad about it either. "Me" time is crucial for a more well balanced life.

Technorati Claim

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 01:45:00 +0000

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How to Set an Appointment

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 11:13:00 +0000

One of the quickest ways to increase your sales and income is learning to set an appointment correctly.

Are you one of the sales professionals that delivers a good presentation, and at the conclusion asks the prospect when they will be back in? Maybe you get a reply of “later in the week,” and you respond with “okay, I’ll see you then.”

Does that seem like a good method? You probably do not get very many returning prospects with that approach. Recent studies show that 70% of prospects do not return for a second visit without a firm appointment. However, those prospects with a set appointment return and purchase 50% of the time.

Wow! You spend all that time with a prospect and 70% of the time, you will never see them again. Are you interested in learning the correct technique?

Rule # 1: Know when your prospects are coming back.

In real estate sales for example, you do not want prospects showing up randomly on a Saturday or Sunday afternoon. This is your prime fishing time for new prospects. Spending this time with an unannounced prospect return eats into your future sales.

How to do this:

Have a reason for a return visit. You do not have to show off all your knowledge on the first visit. If you cannot close a buyer on the first visit, be smart with the information that you provide. Hold back a few key details that they have questions about.

If there are no questions at the conclusion of their visit and they don’t buy, you are not doing a good enough job at discovering their buying objections.

"The two best ways to ensure a return appointment are Urgency and Benefits."

Provide Value and people will return.

Reasons for an appointment:

Unable to show a particular home

Unable to show a certain homesite

Unable to get certain pricing on luxury features

Come back for financing details

Price Increase

Incentives Expiring

I will repeat this line. If you are unable to close the sale, hold back some of the above information for a follow-up.

When you call them, say something to the effect of, “In order to give you the time and attention that you deserve….”

Remember, you need to create urgency and benefits, beginning your statement like I have written above; you make the prospect feel important by the value you will provide them at the appointment.

How To Set The Appointment

Use the Alternate Choice Close.

Say something like this, “Since I know you love the home and that beautiful homesite, I would hate for you to be upset with me if I didn’t inform you that our prices are increasing on Monday. With that in mind, when is a better time for you to come back and review this great opportunity? Is Tuesday at 6:00 PM good, or would Wednesday at 11:00 AM be better?”

Don’t talk again, until they respond. Oh, by the way, be truthful. If you say your prices are going up on a certain day, those prices need to go up. Being dishonest will lead to everyone losing in the long run.

Try this for one month and watch your sales grow!

The 10 Truths about Likeability

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 11:22:00 +0000

Likeability Skill One:
Know your strengths. Understand your current Limitations.
Likeability Skill Two:
Don’t ALWAYS have “the” answer. Even if you think you know ALL the time, be willing to swallow your pride and be AGREEABLE.
Context: If you are teaching or helping someone have the answers (the real ones—not made up). If you are in a normal conversation, be willing to concede to another point of view.
Likeability Skill Three:
Listen first. Respond 2nd. When responding, piggy back your thoughts into a direct response to what you just listened to. This shows understanding and willingness to help.
Likeability Skill Four:
Smile More. Not like a clown, but like you enjoy yourself and the company of others. Smiling makes you approachable.
Likeability Skill Five:
Never buy into the idea that you are bigger or more important than you really are. Keep yourself in check. Job Titles mean very little about power and income has nothing to do with Intelligence.
Likeability Skill Six:
Help other people. Not because you have to, but because you have the opportunity to.
Likeability Skill Seven:
When in a position of leadership, step up and lead. Don’t ever lead by a title or “just because.” That’s ignorance. Show people why they want to follow you. Give them a reason. Share responsibilities with your employees. Recognize people regularly. Let your people become leaders by providing tools to aid them. Micro Managing is NOT leading, it’s managing by fear (Your Fear of someone else failing and the responsibility falling at your desk).
Likeability Skill Eight:
Learn the balance of making your point of view known but not forcing it upon someone else. Disagreements are good when both people are willing to listen and learn. Forcing an opinion “closes” people off and creates tension leading to more separation.
Likeability Skill Nine:
Be willing. This means be willing to learn, to help, to be open to new concepts, to try something new, or to fail. Failure when used properly will lead to future success. Failure is simply a new somewhat unforeseen learning opportunity. It is a skill and strength builder.
Likeability Skill Ten:
Be courteous by being more aware. Be aware of where you are and what you are doing. Being oblivious to your surroundings will lead to rudeness and the perception of lack of intelligence. Being aware will open you up to new opportunities and a high level of perception.

Top 10 Mistakes by Sales People

noreply@blogger.com (Curt Fletcher) — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 11:09:00 +0000

I have compiled a list of the TOP 10 mistakes made by sales people. This list is formed based on years of being in sales and sales training and years of being a consumer.

While most people don't do all of these thankfully, many salespeople do a couple of them. When you read this, be honest with yourself. After all, the only person you are hurting is yourself. Think of all the other people you could help and how much more money you can make by getting a little better at these.

Assumptions - Never assume you understand what a customer is asking. If you think you have a solution to a need the customer has, confirm it. State the solution, then ask if that solution will help them. Remember that just because you like something or your manager likes something, every single customer may NOT like it. Don't point out a "great" feature of your product if you are not already aware that particular customer has a desire for it. When you assume you set yourself up for failure and awkwardness.

Wrong Energy Level - Too many sales people haven't grasped the concept of either having a normal energy level or somewhat mirroring your prospect. Way too often it's either over excited sales person or super relaxed low key sales person. Neither is good. Be normal. If you are too many energy levels higher then the prospect, they WILL think you are obnoxious. If you are too low, then you are perceived as aloof and mildly clueless.

Not Prepared - If you don't know the basic information about your products, you lose. It's okay and perfectly understandable to not be aware of every detail of every product. That is actually a good follow-up scenario. But, if you are not aware of basic pricing, functionality, process, or how a particular product will benefit that particular customer you should NOT be selling it. Learn first, sell second.

Lazy - This one is fairly far reaching. Laziness really encompasses a bit of each category because of a failure to be aware of your deficiencies or lack of knowledge. For the context of this writing, I am going to use lazy to encompass a different meaning. Be on time. If you get to work 10-15 minutes late everyday, you are lazy. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but get to work on time. It just isn't that hard. If a client shows a desire to go see a home, car, product demonstration or whatever else. Take them! Don't give directions. Don't hand them a key. Go take them! What else are doing besides killing a possible sale that is right in your face?

Bad First 2 minutes - Does your greeting stink? Try something else. The first two minutes of any conversation are important for a customers perception of you. Make a note: Many customers don't want to talk to you anyway and want to avoid you initially. Why? Because so many sales people pounce on them in the first two minutes. Don't be that guy / girl. NO SELLING ALLOWED in the first two minutes. This is rapport building time. Be Likeable. Be someone that another person may actually want to talk to. If you screw this part up, it is hard to get yourself back to being viewed favorably.

Over Selling - Over selling is obvious and boring. It is NOT necessary to point out every feature of a product to a customer. They don't care. People want to know details about the things they find important not you. People have short attention spans and no time to waste, so don't bore people with insignificant details. You will lose them. They will tune out and start coming up with escape mechanisms to get away from you.

Confrontational - If a customer makes a statement of dislike, distaste, or dissatisfaction with a product you offer, DON'T take offense. You most likely didn't design it, create it, or invent it. Why are you offended if they don't like it? Find out what they dislike about something and why, then attempt to shift them to something they will like. Confrontation makes the experience bad for the customer and awkward for you. Avoid it.

Talk too Much - If you talk more then you listen, you are talking way too much. If you want to be good at selling and I mean better then most other people, scale your talking way back. You should only be talking to greet someone, ask question about your customer's needs, and answer questions that your customer asks. If you talk to fill what you perceive as an awkward silence, get some more confidence and hold your tongue. If you love to tell personal stories while making a sale, you lose. Customers are there to be helped, not listen to personal stories of some random sales person. Listen to your customers and respond with helpful and thoughtful solutions.

Wrong Focus - If your sole purpose of being in sales is to make a ton of cash, you will lose in the long run. If your goal each day is too sell your product, you also most likely lose in the long run. Focus on that individual customer that is standing in front you. Only focus on helping them. Don't push any product on any person. People love to buy, but they hate to be sold. Focus on helping the client see the benefits of your product and how it improves their current situation. Sales and money will come consistently when and if you have the right focus.

Arrogance - Confidence is crucial. Arrogance is the kiss of death. Arrogance is thinking that you already know everything. In many cases it leads to laziness because you stop learning new stuff. It is annoying and is a major turn-off and it has been a dagger in the heart of many once good sales people. In reality arrogance is false confidence that is created to make up for some personal deficiency in another area. It is basically a personality flaw that covers up a weakness.