One of the things about the new house that is taking me the longest to get used to is the size of the closets.

Let’s just say I moved from a home that was built when people were finally starting to appreciate features like storage and shelving to a home that was built just after the Great Depression and owning three pairs of shoes was considered a luxury.

You might not know this about me, but I own more than three pairs of shoes.

So, I’m purging my closet. I listed a bunch of stuff on Poshmark. Have any of you tried this yet?

It’s been a pretty good experience. I haven’t sold much, as it seems like a lot of people want to either trade or ask for lower prices, and since I’m trying to, you know, get RID of stuff (and recoup some of my moving costs — OUCH), that’s not really an option.

Here’s a shot at my closet if you want to take a looksy and if any you experienced Poshmarkers have any selling tips for me let me know if the comments.

I do know my pictures aren’t the greatest, but that’s about as good as it’s going to get for me right now. Because, LAZY.

Happy shopping!

(click on the widget, yo)

Step 2: Agree to drag your nearly 10-year old daughter who doesn’t know how to ride a bike on a custom-built tandem bicycle.

Step 3: Purchase said bicycle (try not to wince when you see the price tag).

Step 4: Agree to wear matching spandex outfits with coordinating hot pink cycling caps.

The rest is history.

Happy Father’s Day, Dad! 

Hi friends.

It’s been a while.

I just wanted you to know I’m still here.

A few things have happened since I’ve been gone.

1. At the turn of the New Year I got hired on as the official Managing Editor and Social Media Manager for Mint.com (after 1.5 years of contracting with them, this is a HUGE relief). Also, it’s just plain awesome. I love it. I’m tired. But, seriously? I feel like the luckiest girl in the world.

2. I moved. I said goodbye to the Little Hen House (chickens and all). Sometimes the right thing to do is also the hardest thing to do. Being a grownup really sucks sometimes.

3. I’m still writing, but not very often. You can read my latest article here. It’s actually another one about drug store beauty products, so you might like it. But please don’t tell me if you don’t. I hear enough of that all day at work. Thanks.

4. My blog got hacked. Twice. I sat down a few times to write and when I realized everything had been invaded by hackers and spammers and whatever other creepy crawly things that are floating out there, I just took it as a sign and closed my screen.

Luckily, my homie Downtown Rob fixed it for me. Thanks, buddy.

5. I started a new blog. I’m on the fence between shutting this blog down and starting over, or just keeping on keeping on with what I have going on over here.

Part of me wants to start fresh with a totally clean slate, but then I think about how much work it would be to start all over and this blog is a basically a diary of my life for the past 3 years (omg!) and it would be sad to let it go.

I’ll let you know if I ever get the other one up and running. I love the concept of the new blog and it excites me, but there’s no way I can handle having two personal blogs.

(Sidenote: I Hate Your Dog still exists, but the haters scare me. People really, really love dogs and they really, really don’t like it if you don’t. Or at least they don’t like it if you start a whole blog dedicated to your hatred of the species.)

I really want to start posting here again, but a lot has changed since I started this blog. I’m not really sure what this space should be like now. Blogging used to be a release for me — a safe haven where I could share my thoughts and be part of a community, but I haven’t felt that way in a while.

I know this sounds crazy, but apparently there are some bored people out there who like to come here and read about what I’ve been up to and then – get this – they like to gossip and say mean things about me.

I know.

You’d think that life has so much to offer and there are so many beautiful and wonderful things to fill your day with that hating on someone from behind a computer screen would be the LAST thing you’d care to waste your time doing, but I guess some people just haven’t figured out how to enjoy their own lives and stop worrying so much about what other people are doing.

I sincerely wish them the best of luck.

Phew! Well, I’m glad I’ve gotten that all off my chest. Maybe we can start fresh on here. Maybe we can pretend my 6-month unannounced hiatus never happened.

I guess that’s one good thing about the Internet – we now have the attention span of a classroom full of preschoolers who all had bowls of red dye #40 for lunch.

How have you all been? What’s new and exciting? 

I’m sure she’s quite a talented young lady and all, but this still amuses me:

But, as usual, I need to tell a story/make fun of myself first.

I’ve written about it before, but I’ll say it again: I am not crafty. I look at some of you awesome crafty mamas and it seriously humbles me.

On the surface I like the idea of being crafty but when it comes down to it, I just don’t have the patience for it.

Also? It’s safe to say I get almost zero satisfaction out of making DIY pom pom beanies, macraméd teething rings, felt sensory boards and all that other stuff I see flying around Pinterest.

The Avery/Martha Stewart product people reached out to me to see if I’d be interested in trying out some of their holiday gift wrap and packaging.

And I was all, “Umm…. Totally! I’ll do something about creative ways to wrap your Christmas presents. It will be awesome!”

And that, my friends, was a bold-faced lie (oh, and just wait until the end of the story where I tell you about how I missed their posting deadline, too).

Because I do not have gift wrapping skills and I’m not really creative in that department.

And when I say, “I’m not really creative in that department”, I mean — a Kindergartner probably has better cutting and taping skills than I do. And believe me: I know this because I live with one.

But I had really good intentions because I had so much confidence in Martha’s products and I knew, I just knew, that if I tried hard enough, my presents would turn out like this:

Image credits

“Candy cane ribbon” seems like a simple concept and all, but in hindsight, I can see that I was overreaching just a tad.

Because this is what ended up happening:

To be fair, is there a “right” way to wrap a Dream Light Pillow Pet? Don’t answer that, Martha.

Also, I seem to have miscalculated how much paper it would take to cover a Barbie.

She isn’t as petite as she seems, folks.

Although, I totally owned the gift bag portion of the challenge (and don’t you dare try to tell me that’s the easy part – this is my fantasy/blog over here, kay?).

Gift bags for the WIN:

And I kind of killed it at ribbon tying:

I will say that these presents turned out, oh, about a billion times better than last year’s efforts and I have to credit Martha with my…. errrr…success? Ok, let’s just call it “less of a craft fail.”

I usually buy my wrapping paper from the dollar bins at Target and if you haven’t had the privilege of using such a fine product, just imagine wrapping your holiday gifts with a roll of single ply toilet paper. Yeah.

So, maybe this year’s gift wrap extravaganza didn’t go off exactly how I’d planned. Oh well, there’s always next year. Because look what I spotted on the Martha Stewart website…..

Image credits

And yes, I am a glutton for punishment.

And here comes the Martha Stewart/Avery Product giveaway! Aren’t you glad you hung in there until the end?

I have some good news and bad news, but the good news far outweighs the bad. I didn’t get this post up in time to do a giveaway for the Martha Stewart/Avery holiday goods like I was supposed to. (Bad blogger, bad, bad blogger.)

PS: If you want to pick up a couple rolls of that super cute gift wrap and tags, you can get a 40% coupon here — good for one Martha Stewart/Avery Product from the line.

BUT…. The Avery/Martha Stewart peeps are so awesome that they agreed to send one lucky reader a surprise box of goodies. I don’t know what exactly will be inside of the package, but I’m guessing it will have all kinds of crafty/organizy/papery stuff.

And in a way, that’s even more awesome than the original plan.

If you want to enter the Avery Product/Martha Stewart giveaway, just leave a comment below. I’ll keep the giveaway running until midnight, Dec. 24th, 2012, when Santa is scheduled to make his way to my neck of the woods.

Again, just leave a comment below to enter. One winner will be selected using random.org. US entries only please.

Good luck and happy holidays!

I think it goes without saying, but Avery for Martha Stewart provided me with free product to conduct this review and giveaway. Oh, and these are also my own words. I mean, OBV.

THIS GIVEAWAY IS NOW CLOSED.

CONGRATULATIONS TO THE WINNER OF THE MARTHA STEWART/AVERY BOX OF SURPRISES!

My mom (aka: Dr. Mom) hasn’t made an appearance lately, but given the recent tragic events, she wanted to share some important advice with all of you.

I know there are a lot of different opinions and every parent has their own way of handling things, but this is some good, solid, basic advice that I plan on taking.

Hold your babies tight and tell those near and dear to you how much you love them.

———————————————————————————————–

My best, most important advice to all adults is to keep all school-aged children totally shielded from the stories and information about the tragic incident in Connecticut today. Children are not equipped to manage the feelings and reality of such an event.

There is nothing positive about children knowing about such an occurrence. Be sure that children do not hear adults talking about this — and especially shield them from radio and television news.

By the way, it is also extremely detrimental for adults to know too much information as well as flood their brains with repetitive details. At times of grave upset we often feel compelled to watch the news and repeat stories over and over again as a way to process the horror and incredulity.

However, it is better to go on a “news fast” during this time, increase your stress reducing tools (exercise, meditation, yoga, walking, slow breathing), and give your brain “somewhere else to go.”

Best and most important of all, hold your children, listen to some calming music — and send healing, loving thoughts to those traumatized today.

What if my child has already heard about this event from others?  How should I handle that?

Adults are asking how they should respond to their children’s questions if they have heard about this horrific incident from other sources. This is the concept to follow:

Give the simplest response only. Tell your kids that you won’t talk about details, that sometimes we need to protect our brains from ”pictures” that don’t help us.  These kinds of sentences below are options depending on what your children have already heard from others.

If possible, try to avoid talking about the incident being in a school, try to avoid talking about the number of people hurt, and especially try to avoid talking about how many of the injured were very young children and teachers.

This is an opportunity to teach your children how to protect their memories, how to cope, how to help others, and how to continue to see the world as a beautiful, good place. You will also be modeling to them that people do heal, even after very terrible experiences.

Yes, something very sad happened yesterday and some people were badly hurt. At this kind of time many people come to help the people who need it.   Let’s hold hands, close our eyes, and send our most loving thoughts to (say a prayer for) everyone who needs help. We can do our part this way to help the hurt people heal.

Yes, it is true that children and teachers in a school were hurt and some actually died. I want us to keep our brains empty of how that happened.  Those are not pictures we want in our heads. Let’s imagine all the good people there who are helping those who need it. Let’s send our best thoughts (a prayer) to them.

Let’s focus today on how good the world and its people are. Let’s read some stories (read a book, go online, or watch a movie) about how many people in the world are doing wonderful things for one another. Let’s take a walk today and point out how beautiful the world is.

Sometimes very bad things happen. That is a time when people help one another. Let’s think of ways we can help those who need it (write a letter, draw a picture to send). We can help someone be strong and get through this very hard time (give some lesser examples your child might remember when someone has helped in this way).

Remember: do all of these things for yourself as well. We must stress to ourselves the amazing determination of the human spirit to heal from devastating life experiences (think of the many examples in history).

We must all stay grounded in how safe we actually are, how strong we actually are, and how many resources we actually have if we need them.

An Explanation for Adults and Children: How can we try to understand horrific acts of aggression?

It is important to formulate some answer to this question for yourself as well as potentially for your children if they ask for one. Our brains do better if we answer “why” questions looping and looping in our heads.

Below I give an explanation in layperson’s terms of how the world of professional psychology views aggressive behavior that is “far too crazy” to fathom. At the end I spell out in simple sentences what you can say to children if they ask this “why/how” question.

Just as the human body can go awry chemically and hormonally, so can the brain. We have all experienced our brains do this to some degree when we have the flu, lose a night’s sleep, don’t eat, are under stress, and so forth.

Try to remember when your thoughts, and perhaps even behaviors, were “crazy” for you — hopeless, more negative than usual, angry, even somewhat mean and hostile. In the normal human spectrum of feelings we all have these at times.

Certain conditions put these feelings and thoughts way out of the norm — the most common being extreme stress and (brain) chemical imbalances. When a brain is operating significantly out of the norm, we call that “mental illness.”

The world of psychology basically believes that most mental illness is caused by such a chemical imbalance.

If you can recall your own “crazy” thinking at times of stress/illness/fatigue/hunger, imagine multiplying those feelings and responses many, many times over, similar to turning the volume of the stereo up to its loudest point until it is unbearable but not being able to turn it down.

That is similar to what a chemical imbalance in the brain might do to the sentences up there.

What causes chemical imbalances in the brain? 

Some mental disorders are discernable in childhood (in psych lingo — they “present in childhood”). Some develop later (the “onset” is in adolescence or adulthood).  Many times such imbalances run in families, just as many physical illnesses/conditions do.

Sometimes we can find some “stressors” that might have caused an imbalance. Sometimes we find no logical explanation — and assume that a brain just went chemically awry.

How can we know if someone is suffering from an imbalance in brain chemicals? 

Diagnostic criteria is used by medical and psychological professionals to assess someone’s functioning in order to come up with any possible disorder. That becomes the basis of the treatment plan.

A layperson can also simply assess that someone is thinking or acting enough out of the norm to warrent an assessment. Most people with mental illness present symptoms that are pretty clearly “not normal.”

To be safe, I put it this way:  “If it (thinking, behavior) seems crazy, it probably is.” That means someone needs help.

How can we tell if someone might be a danger to himself or others? 

Most of the time the person on the edge of harming someone (self or others) gives obvious clues. We should all be aware of such clues so we know who might need intervention/help and how to get it.

Go online to search for information about “signs that someone might harm himself or others”.

Very important: our teenaged and college-aged children need this information since the majority of such incidents occur with people between the ages of 14-26.

Can someone just “snap” and become violent suddenly?

Yes, this can happen (a dramatic ”psychotic break”), but it is not very common. Almost always there are signs well beforehand that someone is in a dangerous mental state.

How do we miss the symptoms?

When people lived in villages and small towns or communities, everyone took care of one another. The aged, disabled, and mentally ill were cared for by an entire community of people who watched over the situation one way or another.

People noticed how such people were doing, shared the information, and stepped in when interventions were needed. Isolation was much less common, so the person suffering had help and attention before things got out of hand.

The way we live now makes isolation occur easily.  We can miss the signs that someone is on the edge.

Also, it is not often easy to get mental health care or intervention for someone we worry about, especially since we do not often have a “village of people” forcing a reluctant person to accept the help.

How can we all help this situation so that we are all safer and healthier?

First, increase your understanding of what someone’s brain is doing that might cause them to behavor horribly. Try to soothe your own anger and move into understanding and as much compassion as you can muster.

Remember: the perpetrator of a senseless act of violence has a family of people who desperately need help, compassion, understanding, and forgiveness. Our own horror and possible anger only fuel more psychological and physical distress in ourselves and others, increasing the potential for more violence of some kind.

Decide that you will spread calm and compassion, thus safeguarding yourself and your family in the best way possible. Also, stay aware of anyone you know who might be in mental distress.

Keep tabs of how your co-workers, neighbors, friends, and loved ones are doing.  Tell people when you are worried about them. Join forces to get someone help.  Get advice if you are worried and don’t know how to help somone. If you have a niggling worry, ask or take action. Do not ignore your gut messages.

In addition, support mental health care programs and facilities. Spread understanding and acceptance of mental illness as something we must all tackle to get appropriate treatment for those in need.

As a society we are not as enlightened about mental illness as you might think. Stigma and misunderstanding keep these issues in the dark for most people. That is dangerous.

How to I answer the “how/why” question if my children ask it?

These are sentences that might help you answer this appropriately for your children:

“People’s brains can get sick just like our bodies do. Sometimes that makes someone say or do things that we think of as “crazy.” When people are thinking clearly (the brain is well), they don’t do really terrible things to others (or themselves).

It is horrible for everyone when someone’s brain is so very, very sick that they hurt other people (or themselves). We will send our best thoughts (prayers) to (the person who is sick, his family and friends) so we can help them get through this very hard time.

We can also be especially helpful and nice to everyone right now because lots of people are feeling sad about this.”

Again, spread kindness, patience, and compassion right now. Everyone is needing it more than ever.

- Mary Mudd Quinn, Ph.D.

image credits

What’s new with you? Tell me something good!

Here are 10 Holiday Gifts That Give Back:

I recently covered 10 Holiday Gifts for $10 or Less, but since the season of giving is upon and and ’tis better to give than to receive, why not consider giving a gift that gives back, too?

As consumers reel from an uncertain economy, job losses, and natural disasters, it can be difficult to embrace the concept of holiday shopping when so many members of our communities and others around the world are struggling with basic, everyday needs.

There is a way to clear your conscious from the holiday shopping-induced guilt: Focus on giving gifts that give back. Not only will you feel good about supporting a cause you care about, but the recipient will appreciate the thoughtful and unique gesture. Not to mention the charity you select benefits as well.

And just so you know, giving back is actually good for you.

According to Naomi Eisenberger, a UCLA assistant professor of psychology, “When people talk about the ways in which social support is good for our health, they typically assume that the benefits of social support come from the support we receive from others, but it now seems likely that some of the health benefits of social support actually come from the support we provide to others.”

Imagine if every gift on your holiday shopping list also gave back to a charity. That sure would result in a lot of feel-good feelings floating around — talk about embracing the holiday spirit!

If you are ready to make your dollars count and spread some extra holiday cheer, here are 10 holiday gifts that give back:

Endangered Animals

WWF Species Adoption - $50 to $250

Give a gift that will help protect the future of nature. Your symbolic adoption supports WWF’s global efforts to protect wild animals and their habitats.

Military Families

ONEHOPE Wine - $18.99 (for the Zinfandel for military families)

ONEHOPE Wine donates an astounding 50% of its profits to partner charities benefiting a variety of causes. Their Zinfandel is paired with helping families of fallen troops attend Snowball Express to enhance the quality of life for post 9/11 service members.

Disaster Victims

Emergency Shelter from the American Red Cross - $50

In the wake of Hurricane Sandy, this gift is the perfect way to honor those affected by the storm.

Disaster victims often have to leave their homes with nothing but the clothes on their backs. Just $50 gift provides urgently needed essentials for one disaster victim, including three meals, two blankets, one cot and personal supplies.

Crimes Against Women

PUNJAMMIES™ - $10

PUNJAMMIES™ are created in after-care facilities for women who have been rescued, released or escaped from a life of forced prostitution. Every pair tells the story of a woman who was, once, voiceless.

When you buy PUNJAMMIES, you are key part of her path out of modern-day slavery and into a life of hope, dignity and freedom. Wear PUNJAMMIES. Wear hope.

Families in Need

2 Chickens from World Vision - $25

Your gift of chickens will naturally multiply to impact generations of children. Each family that receives chickens can sell the offspring for extra income or share them with other families in need.

Chicks require little money, space, or food to thrive and grow — making them an ideal business venture for a single mom or vulnerable family.

Humankind

Intentional Chocolate Small Gift Box - $45

Intentional Chocolate is infused with spiritual energy by meditators who trained with the Dalai Lama. The effect of eating this chocolate has been said to promote health and well being. Whether or not you support this concept of intention-enhanced food, some studies do suggest consuming any kind of chocolate has a positive effect on mood and energy.

But perhaps the best feel-good aspect of this treat lies in the fact that 50% of the profits go to organizations that benefit humankind.

HIV

Same Sky Fabric Wraps - $40

SAME SKY is a jewelry company that provides employment to HIV-positive women in Africa struggling to lift themselves out of poverty. Empowered as artisans, they’re proudly rebuilding their lives. Each stunning bracelet represents one woman’s fight for survival and prosperity.

Animal Abuse

Max the Shelter Dog - $13.95

Max the Shelter Dog is a children’s picture book about the life of one lonely pit bull in an animal shelter. This book is designed to help children learn the importance of compassion towards animals.

A portion of the proceeds of the book go to charities that increase awareness for pit bulls, one of the most misunderstood dog breeds.

Clean Water

Cuyana iPad Case - $65

More than one billion people don’t have access to safe drinking water. Access to clean water could save the millions of lives lost from water-borne diseases, billions of hours spent mainly by women and children searching for clean water, increase school attendance, and dramatically improve local economies.

Cuyana donates a percentage of their profits to charity:water, a leading non-profit that is doing an incredible job at creating and implementing clean water solutions around the world.

Dental Care

Bogobrush - $10

I mentioned this company in my last gift guide, but the concept and design is so cool that I had to include it here, too.

Not only will you look good while brushing those pearly whites, but this ultra sleek, biodegradable toothbrush gives back, too. When you order a Bogobrush, the same toothbrush is sent to one of the more than 80 million of Americans without access to adequate dental care.

Child Hunger

Finally, if these 10 gifts don’t appeal to anyone on your list this year, consider doing your online holiday shopping from a site like Save1.com.

The site offers coupons and special deals from thousands of the top online stores in America.

When you buy something from any of these stores using one of their coupons or special offers, your purchase will provide a meal to a hungry child. Save money and fight child hunger.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Have a great weekend!