The Mabry Family Blog

Dinner at My House

2014-01-19T19:15:00.003-06:00

The kids were unusually wild at the table. Even before getting the table set there had been two fights and everyone fussing. Brenna and I looked at each other with quite a few eye rolls, and I lofted up a suggestion that we eat somewhere else…like in the basement away from the kids.

As dinner got started, the kids weren't eating much and talking and fussing more. As I attempted several tactics at gaining control of the kids behavior (nice suggestions, sour looks, corrective comments, etc., all ineffectual at best, I realized Brenna is better at handling kids for sure. I think that Brenna and I should come to the dinner table with a black and white jersey and several yellow flags and a whistle sometimes.

Here are some of the heinous behaviors that went on at dinner:

Someone asked, "Would a T-Rex use a fork like this?" Promptly dropping the fully loaded fork.
Bryce tried to use the Force ala Star Wars to get the apple sauce by pointing his had at it and looking like he was straining really hard.
Aiden actually used the force…and a "may I have the applesauce?" question that worked. His success then generated something of an "excessive celebration" penalty worthy touchdown dance.
A game of squirrell random trivia replete with stunning tidbits of knowledge like, squirrells eat nuts, squirrels sleep in trees, squirrells have "poofy tails", and they look bad when flat on the road.
Bryce breaking into a Broadway musical solo that basically (and noisly) expanded on the theme that his brother is smelly.
Aiden actually being smelly.
Ansley and Bryce pushing on each other and then telling on the other one with greater and greater exadgerations on what actually happened.
Complementing Brenna's cooking by saying that they loved the, "Soda". Which, by the way, the kids didn't even have…sooo…what's that say?
A thoroughly frustrated Brenna pulled out a list of Do's and Dont's at dinner for etiquette purposes and the kids basically did whatever she said not to do. Loudly and with great vigor.
I couldn't stop laughing so I had to leave the table early and willl sneak back in there later and clean up to make up for leaving my poor wife with the screaming hordes.

Maybe next time the parents can keep the dinner kids' behavior at a more normal level. Whatever normal is…

Consciousness, Stream thereof…

2013-10-22T20:25:00.000-05:00

I was sitting at lunch today and thought that I should write something different. The Super Villain portion of the story has roots in a performance I heard on NPR the other evening while driving home from Texas. I modified it quite a bit since I couldn't remember all of it and other parts wouldn't work at all. I also tried to find the performer or author to give some credit, but I couldn't find reference to this anywhere. Thanks to whomever did the Super Villains aren't always the bad guys story on NPR.

I read this to my wife and kids and the kids laughed. Especially at the Canadian goose comment, but Brenna just said my brain was all over the place. I thought it wasn't a bad little bit of work for a lunch hour, and I suppose she's right about the cacophony of thoughts that clang through my gray matter. My brain works like this and I'm pretty used to it after 40+ years. I hope you like it, and if you don't, fine. If you do, are there any other topics for these two characters to explore?

Anyway...here goes nothing...

Sometimes Sal, a nickname that he really didn’t want to explain again to another questioning stranger, would sit around his room and have relatively deep conversations with his younger brother. As deep as a 15 year old yearning for a driver’s license and a 9 year old brother could have that is.

This younger brother had recently taken to just wandering into Sal’s room in the evening hours after everyone had gone to bed without knocking, which, unfortunately, had caused one uncomfortable moment as Sal hurriedly re-hid the magazines he normally kept hidden under the mattress hoping that his sibling hadn’t noticed the questionable subject matter these coveted magazines covered.

The brother, was fondly called Mick-ums, or micky-boo or micky bear (MB for short). There are quite a number of odd names that parents think are cute but wear off as one gets older – or should wear off. MB seemed to be the current name around the house which was fine by him. MB, thought it was much less embarrassing to be called by initials in front of his friends. Although his Mom would still give what he and Sal both called “Ninja Kisses” by sneaking up on him and kissing his head when his friends were around, so having his parents potentially dropping the Micky-bear name was always a bit of a worry in social settings.

This evening, fortunately, had no awkward moment as MB walked in wearing his usual orange sleep shirt and Official NFL licensed pajama bottoms. Sal noticed MB’s shirt was on backwards for a change and wasn’t quite sure if he had just done it to be different or if it was an honest-to-gosh-I-got-dressed-in-the-dark kind of mistake.

Everybody has moments like that, right? Sal had even seen his dad walking bleary-eyed through the kitchen one morning with his shirt on backwards and inside out as he mumbled about being out of coffee.

MB plopped down, squishing into the bean bag chair in the corner of the room. The chair sighed and spewed a few of those little Styrofoam balls through a small hole made by a poorly considered toss of the clandestine throwing star that Sal also kept stashed between his mattresses. Sal watched the little geyser of bean bag chair stuffing settle onto the carpet.

“Super Man is good right?” asked MB.

It was an odd a question, but no more so than normal in their evening talks, Sal thought.

“I heard a story on NPR about how this guy, a Super Villain, had split dimensions into smaller and smaller layers in his Super Laboratory. In one dimension he discovered, and then sorta somehow loaded, God or the Devil into a gun. I guess the Super Villain wasn’t sure which one actually was in the gun, but by the end of the story it doesn't really matter."

Sal also thought that his 9 year old brother was thinking “Waaaay above his pay grade” as his Dad would say.

“The Super Villain waited, after blowing up an entire office park or something, for Super Man to come and arrest him. So when Super Man arrived and announced, “You are going to jail for a very long time.” the Super Villain went along quietly.

When Super Man had hauled him under his arm into the air, the Super Villain whispered (he knew he could whisper even over the shrieking wind because Super Man has that Super Hearing thing). He whispered, “I have something for you.” and proceed to shoot Super Man right between the eyes with the God or Devil loaded gun.”

MB paused for a second to think before continuing the story. “As a result of the shot and the release of, uh, I think they called it, a concentrated but questionable deity, they were both transported into a quiet space where they were no longer flying. No movement. No stars. Not hot. Not cold. Just black. Black and a voice. A voice with a question for Super Man. God/Devil asked, “If you could save all of Mankind by sacrificing yourself. Right here. Right now. Would you?” “Or”, the voice asked, “Would you take the knowledge that all of Mankind will destroy itself and live the rest of your life with them on Earth as a hero?”

“Super Man”, MB said, “In the story, Superman responded with one word.”

“Hero.”

Sal, laid back on his bed with a fat pillow under his head and pondered this bit of random NPR conveyed creativity for a moment, and asked. “MB, What are you listening to NPR for anyway?” “You’re nine and I don’t know of anybody even my age that listens to NPR. What’s up with that? Seriously, if anyone found out, you would be like marked for death or something.”

MB replied, still honestly waiting on an answer to his question about Super Man, “It was This American Life or something. It’s cool, Sal. They tell stories and stuff. Though, it is kinda weird though sometimes.”

Sal, knowing he wasn’t going to bother answering his brother’s Super Man question and seriously wondering whether or not he should surreptitiously try listening to NPR, said. “It sounds like it’s kinda weird all the time, MB.” Then laughing, “It’s fitting for a kid like you though.”

MB threw some of the Styrofoam beads from the chair at Sal but they didn’t get anywhere close and many just stuck to his fingers.

Sal, seeing his brother’s annoyance offered. “Ok, MB, flying or mind control?”

“What?” asked MB.

“You heard me. You know. Superpowers. Flying or Mind Control? You’re the one that came in here talking about Super Man and a God/Devil loaded gun.” Sal said while staring at some paint bubbles on the ceiling that might be the beginnings of a roof leak that he should probably tell his dad about.

MB, realizing that Sal wasn’t going to entertain him with an answer on Super Man, said “Flying. Totally Flying. Who wouldn’t want to fly?”

“Me.” Said Sal. “I mean, flying’s cool and would possibly be good in some cases, but think about it. What couldn’t you do with mind control? And I don’t just mean stuff like Obi-Wan waving his hand and saying, “These aren’t the droids you are looking for. Move along.” type of stuff.”

MB had followed his brother’s gaze and was looking at the paint bubbles too now. Sal continued, “Look, flying might get you from one place to another in a hurry, but you have to worry about frostbite at high altitudes and bugs in your eyes or worse at lower levels. You know, worse like flying into a flock of those hideous poop machine Canadian Geese. Mind control gives you everything. You can control everything! Invisibility? - Got it. I just make people I’m around not notice me. Telekinetics? - Got it. I just get that person to move whatever I wanted moved or unlock whatever door I might need.”

MB said, “That’s still not a real power where people can see you and know you are really something different. Something special.”

Sal, thinking how to relate his power of choice to MB’s visible super power comment, “Flying… Here’s my flying power. Walk into the airport. “Captain, I need a ride to Name-a-place NOW." And poof Flying…Got it. There’s a ton of responsibility with it though. You had better be just about incorruptible to handle the responsibility of mind control.”

Sal Yawning and still talking. “Yaaa-ooou could end world wars by getting on TV or something and just telling everyone to go home. But you could also really become like a dictator of the world as well.”

MB closed his eyes sleepily on the bean bag chair and said, “I’d still pick flying power. I could go anywhere without anybody’s help and people would all know me. I’d totally rock the NFL being able to fly over all the players and get a touchdown every time.”

Sal joked, “There’s probably a rule against flying in football somewhere.”

MB, “Nah. There’s not ‘cause nobody can fly yet.”

Sal, “Mind control would let me just make all the guys miss on the tackles. Same result but more subtle so the rule people wouldn’t have to change anything." Sal raising his arms but his brother wasn't looking.

"Touchdown.”

MB, “Either way…we’d be rich.”

“Too True.” Said Sal…

Could it be worth it?

2013-09-20T21:51:00.001-05:00

Yeah, I'm a 40 year old guy that will never afford to participate in proper motor racing, but like any guy (40 or otherwise) I like to dream about it. I also, like many people, play the Forza 4 Video game on my Xbox 360. I say that, but as of this week, I had to send my console off to the unknown lands of the Microsoft Service Department to get it to work again... I know I didn't play it that much...

Naturally, Microsoft has waited until I have spent quite a bit of money building up the car packs and other assorted goodies (sold separately) for my Forza 4 game before announcing the second coming...

Queue the angelic choirs now...

I'm not going to geek out on gaming systems, but I know that the new Forza 5 game, that will be released along with this new monolithic Xbox, is well...suposedly just slightly better.

Of course, my head (and my wallet) say there is no way it's worth buying a console and a slew of new new games when I have a perfectly fine Xbox 360. (I assume it will be "perfectly fine" when it's back from the shop that is.)

But videos like these?

By the way, as I was ~~drooling over~~, er, watching the last video, I noticed some turns I recognized. It's the local track where I have actually rocketed around on my motorcycle. (Ok, "rocketed" is a relative statement there compared to some). Barber Motorsports - A great place to drive fast...

I'm pulling away - not holding up everyone on the VFR. I promise...

Now if Barber were on Forza 5 - I'm pretty sure, this question on whether it would be worth the money would not really be a question...

A heck of a story...

2013-08-24T16:50:00.000-05:00

I found myself standing in a bike shop again, of all places, with a helmet in hand. Something I had decided on the side of a trail (quite colorfully I might add) that I would never do again.

The manager had a puzzled look on his face as I hesitantly put my purchase on the counter. Perhaps I was telegraphing my conflicting thoughts on the moment a bit more overtly than I had intended. In the end, I handed him my credit card, signed the flimsy slip of paper, and took my bulky purchase of a new Giro helmet under my arm, and squinting in the summer sunlight, walked through the door into the humid Alabama air.

Insert cheesy rewind visual here--back to the morning of April 21st.

I stepped on the scale this morning and was down to race weight. I felt fast. I felt strong. I felt like this season was going to be the best ever. My riding workouts were getting easier by the week and I felt that I would be strong enough to really do some damage at whatever I entered this season. Being a 40 year old guy with three kids and a job, whatever I entered would probably be one of the last strong competitive seasons I could get a hold of. I had a big hairy goal of winning my division of the Oak Mountain Bump and Grind this year. I know I'm not a professional and really not all that fast in the overall, but I had some speed and strength. I had placed second in my age group the year before, and realized if I rode at the edge of throwing up for just a little longer on the climb, I might be able to pull off a win. As long as the dude with the tree trunk legs didn't show up again...

Seriously, the guy who won was 90% leg...

It was a spring day, one of those clear days where the sky is really deep blue and the humidity of the deep south hasn't set in yet for the duration of the summer. I had the gigantic orange Niner bike on the back of the truck and the family and I went to early Mass at OLV, which has the added benefit of being about 10 minutes from the parking lot of the Oak Mountain State Park where I planned to ride.

I think back on the irony of my conversation with Brenna as we left church. Something to the effect of "I can't crash anymore; it's just too hard on me. I'll be careful, but I'm totally riding the downhill section of the loop today!" Giddy like a kid as I usually was when thinking of bombing over the drops and around the turns. She just rolled her eyes like most of the times when I get excited about riding that bike.

We parted ways with a quick smooch that made the kids say "Eeew! Mom! Dad!", and I said I'd be back in a couple of hours since it would take me about 90 minutes to finish the loop.

The ride itself was going well. It was cool and dry. The trails were solid enough that your wheels weren't sliding all around in dust, but it wasn't the normal summer tacky trail where you would either confidently stick through any angle of a turn or would find a puddle from the recent rains that would cover you in muck. I ground up the double track that led to the Lightening trail, sweat dripping on the Niner slogan printed on the top tube - PEDAL D*MN IT! I road out the narrow bridge funnel that weeds the people out that really don't have the skills to be on the trail. Then I dropped into the flow of the hills and table top jumps with a yell and a grin. The wind rushing. The gears clicking. Wheels rumbling over the terrain.

I rounded a burmed turn pedaling as fast as I could, grin still planted firmly on my face. Had I died at that moment, it would have been an effort for the mortician to make me look like I wasn't enjoying myself even in death. As I came off the turn, I realized I had forgotten a quick steep ramp in the trail. I was going much to fast for it. I hit the brakes as hard as I could as I climbed the face of the jump. It was already over. The suspension on the bike compressed and as I came over the top, the bike was thrown forward violently into the air. I landed and rode the front wheel down the face of the jump for a moment and then went over the bars.

I hit hard.

First the right arm, out to catch myself, crunched as it broke, and I rolled to the left and felt the hit on my head and left shoulder. The air went out of my lungs and the pieces of helmet flew around. I sat up in the cloud of dust knowing I had broken my arm. I had broken my leg just 15 months earlier and had plates removed in surgery just 2 months before that ride. I howled into the woods. "NO! I CAN'T HAVE DONE THIS AGAIN!" I was on my own in the woods on a Sunday morning. Not many people would be by to help, and I had a way to go. I kicked the Niner off the trail so nobody else would hit it coming over the rise, and I pushed off with my left arm to try to get up. My shoulder collapsed awkwardly to my cheek, and what I discovered to be a compound fracture of my collar bone made my situation a touch more complicated. I was stuck, alone on a steep winding downhill trail, miles from my car, and I couldn't use my arms. I rolled and contorted myself to get to my knees and managed to stand. In the cloud of pain and possibly a few tears (not that I would admit it), I started to walk downhill with my arms crossed in across my chest to keep them from shifting the bones. I walked, searching for the main trail, where I might find a passing rider to help me.

I wandered off the trail for a while to avoid the steep sections where I might slip and fall again. Being that I couldn't catch myself if I slipped made this a pretty wise choice I thought. I kept the trail in sight as I walked to avoid becoming disoriented and lost in my state. After a time, I started yelling "HELP" into the forest. As much as I wanted to - and I tried mind you - I didn't sound manly at all. I just was hoping somebody would come and help get me off the trail. I luckily ran into a husband and wife riding at the exit of the downhill onto the main trail. I had no idea who they were, but they stopped and called 911 for me. The husband left his bike and helped me hike the next half mile or so to the double track where a ranger could get a truck to get me. His wife raced ahead to reach and direct anyone coming.

The end of the double track trail was a flashing parade of red and white strobe lights. A pumper fire truck (Why? I'm hot and all but my abs aren't what they used to be...) and an ambulance had come to get my miserable body out of the wilderness and into some hideous hospital. I love doctors and nurses. They are possibly the most wonderful people in the world, but I hate hospitals. They stink of disinfectants, sickness, and pain. There's something deep in the primitive portion of your brain that tells you to avoid places that smell like that. I should try to listen to what it tells me more often.

Funny side note. The paramedic nurse that helped get me stabilized was a skydiver and we talked about that and how much safer it was than cycling. I only broke an arm in a decade and 740 skydives...

As they were cutting off my CamelBak that I got for my Hurricane, Utah trips; gloves that I picked up riding in Moab, my classic Motorola team jersey that my uncle gave me, my helmet was taken off and broken pieces of it fell to the floor of the ambulance. A load of memories of my days riding were quickly becoming the last events rather than just a few in a long line of expected plans. The foam was crushed in a perfect circle that protected my skull. I had hit a rock that destroyed the outside shell and I do believe that the Giro saved me from a severe skull fracture now that I look at the damage.

I never planned to ride again. I just can't ride without breaking myself.

Which leads back to the start of this post. The thoughts are still fresh, the pain in my arm and shoulder that are still quite evident when I move, and the fact I was standing there with a new helmet - unsure...

Wanting, if not quite ready yet...

To ride again.

Around the World on a Bike

2013-04-14T15:15:00.000-05:00

I rolled past an interesting mileage marker today. I have spent enough time on a bicycle to have ridden around this amazing little blue planet, and all these miles have been covered in little loops that didn't actually take me anywhere at all. How odd an activity to enjoy now that I think of it like that.

I hadn't had this as a goal or anything, and I personally know people who cover this kind of distance in a matter of a couple of years vs the 10 it took me, so I know it's really not a big deal, but yet I'm spending some time blabbering about it anyway.

It's my blog, pfft...

Back to the point. Yes, I know I tend to wander into a stream of consciousness type of writing instead of efficiently getting to the point of the post.

You're welcome.

I noticed the number coming up in my workout Excel log that I built to track my mileage over the years. I'm a geek...I know it, but recording this sort of thing for years on end seems interesting to me, and it certainly has recorded how much I have ridden and how my weight has actually not gone down during the process... Heh heh... Perhaps sitting on my duff for a year because I can't stay upright on snow skis without creating a second joint in one leg had something to do with my current physical shape!

There I go once more...back to the point...again... *sigh*

I had only 11 miles to ride to reach 24,901 miles since I had started riding bikes regularly. (The circumference of the planet at the equator, since the Earth is fattest there)

I had planned a magnificent Timewaster Studio video production to mark the moment. Replete with panning shots of beautiful vistas at dawn, sun glinting through green spring leaves as I climbed the local hills, rocks and trees flashing by as I pedaled along the trails...you know cool kind of images that would be fitting to record such a random mileage moment.

Instead, Mother Nature gave me a 50 degree day, overcast with a 30% chance of rain. Which proved, much to my chagrin, to actually be 100% as I rolled out of the garage, and thereafter became a deluge before the ride was over.

Soooo, instead of beautiful footage of the ride and great photos of yours truly looking knowingly into the distance over mountaintops...I got these.

Yep...30% chance...

Well, I'm here. I guess I'll go anyway...

Whatever...

The ride itself was fun. I crashed once because of wet roots, but managed to land on my feet. Too bad I didn't get that on video. But, by the time I hit the mileage "moment", I was completely soaked and the trails had degraded into puddles of standing water. Here is my photo of the moment, and it didn't last long because I got cold really quickly. Without the effort of riding, I was woefully under dressed for the conditions.

Wow...I look old these days. I guess it's better than not aging anymore though!

Speaking of getting cold (not old), there is a tenuous balance in endurance sports between overheating and getting cold, and people are always trying to find that balance. If you are working hard, you can be out in riding gear that most people would never wear for the conditions, but you aren't able to vary from that effort level much at all without experiencing some discomfort.

Oh, looky...I've gone off on another tangent.

I'll leave you with a few random tidbits from my time on the bike related to the miles I have covered.

As of today:

24,903 miles
1,570 rides
10 Years
1 collar bone (now augmented by a 5" plate and 7 screws)
4.3 bazillion tire tubes
2,300x my weight in Gatorade and lousy tasting energy gels and Powerbars.
1,100 Chipotle Burritos - (1000 cal/burrito and 700 cal/hour average workout output)

Seriously, who doesn't do the Burritos burned per hour calculation? Mmmm...burritos...

Approximately 1.9% of my total waking life
I'm not going to try to calculate the gallons of sweat... You're welcome...again.
3 Race Wins, 1 2nd place, 7 top ten, and a whole lot of middle-of-the-pack.
Untold amounts of patience from my loving wife...

See you on the trails!

Indy at Barber Motorsports

2013-04-13T07:46:00.000-05:00

One of the best things about living in Birmingham, that most people wouldn't think of when talking about the town, is that there is a fantastic motor sports track 20 minutes from my house. We make a run out to the place a few times a year to take in some howling motors of various types. Last weekend we had the pleasure of the Honda Indycar race coming to town.

My parents were in town from Tyler, Texas and we all ventured out into a lovely spring day. The grass wasn't as green this year as in years past. For some reason, it seems to have been cool and the dormant grass hadn't come alive yet, but the trees certainly had. There were clouds of yellow blanketing the area...bleh.

Needless to say, we weren't deterred by everyones' cars turning a sickly shade of yellow before our eyes, and we all loaded up on antihistamines and headed out to watch some racing.

Here is a virtual lap around the Barber Motor sports course, and you can see the course as well in some of my motorcycle track day videos here and here.

We watched the race from a grassy hill around turn one but went over to the Paddock to look at the cars and see some of the drivers before the race started. The kids thought it was pretty neat to be right in among the cars as the teams wheeled them out and onto the track for the warm up lap and flying start.

Bryce's favorite car, the Boy Scout car, just after getting fueled up. I wish they had started an engine close by to us so we could feel just how loud these things are. Noting the faring in front and behind the rear wheels on this Indycar makes me wonder why the Formula 1 cars haven't adopted such a thing if it actually reduces drag to a material degree?

The paddock safety officers had to clear a path to get all the cars out to the track. Here they are towing a car out and they switched the rain tires (note the grooves) to the racing slicks once in the pits. Also, note the green pollen stuck all over the front wheel as they rolled it the first 10 yards. Yuk...

We set up camp on a hillside and I shot an iPhone panorama of our springtime "stadium seating".

As the race started we got a chance to see just how fast the cars were. They were warming the tires by weaving their cars back and forth across the track while the poor little pace car was whining and sliding as it navigated the course as fast as it could go. When the Safety Car pulled off into the pits and the race began the noise increased tenfold.

The Start!

You could feel the engines in your chest as the cars raced by. To see a vehicle go from a tight 60mph turn and accelerate to 150-160 mph in just seconds was astonishing, and viewing that never gets old.

My mom noted that all the cars passing by sounded like angry bees. That would be one serious swarm of bees...the kind of thing that would be featured in blockbuster disaster movies...or perhaps the final book in the Bible. The signs of the Blood red moon, the 4 horsemen, and 700 horsepower bees... Yikes.

Turn 1 through a hole in the fence.

After about 20 laps the kids were getting cooked. Typical, 20 laps of 90 and they are ready to go. I have found that open wheel racing is good for ADHD people like me since they aren't 3-4 hour long oval track endeavors. But oh no, not my offspring. 20 laps and that's all that they can handle without getting into fights for entertainment. I had kind of guessed they would have that reaction even though we were sitting below a Jumbo-tron screen showing the race and just off the track where the cars whipped by. We hopped a tram and headed over to the kids area for a new view of the track and to let the kids run around while the adults tried to keep up with all the driving exploits.

I got a few pictures, as you can see above in the action shots, but was having less success this time than in past events getting a clear picture. Who knows why, but I wasn't happy with how they turned out. I guess I'm glad I don't have to make money taking photographs for a living. The family would be pretty malnourished.

Ryan Hunter-Reay had a car that was handling the course beautifully and led for a number of laps early on. As the race came to the last 10 laps, Ryan ended up in the lead again being chased by Brenna's favorite team - The Target Car...driven by Scott Dixon. Ryan never gave up the lead after that and he and Scott were pulling away from the 3rd place car rapidly as the final lap came. A great day and a great race.

Hopefully, now that spring is here, I'll have more writing to do on this blog because the family will have more fun activities going on. Naturally, removing that 8 inch plate from my leg with the 10 screws lends itself to me feeling good enough to do some entertaining (and blog worthy) things as well. There's just not much to write about during a year where most of the time I sat in front of an Xbox and a computer at work...

Have a great week everyone, and enjoy The Masters!

Rollercoasters!

2013-04-02T21:55:00.002-05:00

Bryce had a birthday. Holy smokes! He's eleven now! And now that I think of it, that sparks a troubling thought that probably happens to everyone that realizes that they have a kid that's not a little kid anymore.

Wait, when I have an older kid, that means that I'm....gasp!

For his birthday, we took everyone out to Busch Gardens in Tampa to ride some roller coasters until we were borderline ill and stumbling into stuff. For some of us, this took fewer loops than others. We rode the Cheetah first; which, instead of using a gravity based drop to achieve the speed for the ride, it uses a series of magnets to launch the cars forward in flat sections and then sends you up and over hills producing a nice negative G at the top.

Bryce's first ride on a big roller coaster and you can see the "What the heck am I getting into" face in the photo. Eek!

It turns out, that the Cheetah may not have been the best ride to open up the day with, because every major coaster thereafter was met with something like this...

Me: Cool! Another coaster to sling my brain out my ear! Let'sGOLet'sGOLet'sGOLet'sGOLet'sGO!!!

Ansley: Yeah! Let'sGOLet'sGOLet'sGOLet'sGOLet'sGOLet'sGO!!!

Bryce: Nah. I'm good...

Me: Seriously lets all go. It'll be FUN! Let'sGOLet'sGOLet'sGOLet'sGOLet'sGOLet'sGO!!!

Ansley: has already run into the coaster line without us...

Bryce: Seriously Dad... I'm good...

So, out of all this, I discovered my son, who has a cautious side, is not going to be a coaster fanatic, but my daughter...to say the least...is already one. Since Aiden wasn't tall enough to ride the big coasters. Brenna and I would do the kid swap thing where I would ride with Ansley, and Mom would wait with the non-riders and then we would swap. Ansley would naturally then go and ride it again... with Mom.

Ansley couldn't get enough of these coasters. She rode every major coaster in the park and combined to ride them 17 times. Even the ridiculous diving coaster "Shiekra" that I walked away with bruises from riding. Ansley rode that thing 4-5 times.

Who would have thought an 8 year old would be that fearless? Of course the first time had its moments. The ride takes you up 200 feet, then inches you over the lip to a straight down drop, and stops for a count of 3 before letting you go. At that point Ansley looked like she was in over her head and was about to cry. I told her that I was sorry, but we were in it now and there wasn't any way back.

The anticipation is worth the whole ride. After that drop, it's a looping fighter jet kind of ride. As soon as we dropped, Ansley was just fine and giggled/screamed the whole way down. Good stuff.

We also did some other fun stuff like take the safari ride around...which had it gone like this, it might have been more interesting!

The guide did make a note of Bryce's birthday and messed with him a little. It was pretty funny.

We didn't see any Hippos that I can recall on that ride, and that's just fine with me considering they are the most dangerous animal in all of Africa and nastiest, grossest, poo-flingingest - is that even a word? - nevermind. I'm not a fan needless to say.

See what I mean about dangerous!

Although, signs with warnings like the one below make me think that ignorant humans are by far and away worse than hippos. Seriously, if a theme park has to write this down to reminded these idiots not to send their disgustingly ill children into the water to infect everyone elses' children, there is something very very wrong. I'm a parent, so I understand that kids get ill at the worst times, but seriously, if you know your kid is sick...

Aiden had his share of fun stuff even though he wasn't quite tall enough to ride the big rides. I'm curious to see if he is as cautious as Bryce or if he is a thrill seeker like Ansley...or if he is something completely different.

I think everyone had a good time, and I know I have a coaster buddy for life now. I also know exactly what to get Ansley for her Birthday...

Tickets to ride.

Aerobatics Weekend

2012-11-02T12:00:00.000-05:00

Now for those of you not "in the know".

Not that anyone out there in this interweb thingy doesn't know every detail about me possible, whether I want it that way or not quite frankly... I turned 40 not too long ago, and in the process of my getting older my wife got "awesomer?" I'm sure it's a word, and if not, it is now because it's posted in the internetish ethers for all eternity.

Awesomer? You might ask? Naturally, you are in a huge rush to use the newest word in the collective dictionary. I understand. Crud, now that I bother to look, I am not the first to use awesomer...

*Sigh* Now that I have spent at least a few minutes typing a lead-in that is leading nowhere, I'll get to the post.

You're welcome.

My wife got me a chance to go flying. Not just flying lessons, but lessons with a twist. A, dare I say it, awesomer twist. There, I said it.

Aerobatic flying lessons! I told you it was awesomer.

This was one of the most challenging things I have done. I spent years around light aircraft with my skydiving, and have flown a limited discovery flight in a Cessna around Georgia years ago, but here was a chance to get some basic flight training and couple it with some serious aerobatics with one of the best coaches in the area. The challenge came with stuffing my brain full of concepts and flight instruction and then trying to put it into practice in the pressure of a noisy and unfamiliar aircraft. right rudder...right rudder...don't climb...seriously quit climbing...we aren't supposed to be in the clouds...

I think I was a bit of a project for Greg who normally deals with pilots that have hundreds of hours to see what he could teach me aerobatically while I was also processing the basics of how to fly in general.

We spent the weekend up at Sky Country Lodge with Greg Koontz. Greg has been teaching pilots and performing professionally in airshows for many years. It was a real experience to catch up with him and his wife Cora at their place in Ashville, AL. They made us, and another couple that were staying there, feel like family. I can't say enough about how great they were. I recommend you check it out if you are a pilot (or even if not as was my case) and want a weekend of fun instruction

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Brenna came in to hang out on Saturday and enjoy the fun of sitting at a grass strip airport like old times from when I was jumping from planes every weekend. She seemed happy. That may have been related to the fact that Greg and Cora cooked for us, entertained us with endless stories, and there were no kids around...aside from the semi-grown-up kind.

The set up was a bed and breakfast at Greg's beautiful house and hours of flight instruction followed by applying that training (plus some) in the air. There was so much information to absorb it was almost too much in a good way.

We were flying a Super Decathlon and it was a heck of a plane to learn to fly in. Much more entertaining than the more pedestrian Cessna 152/172's that are quite common. The Cessna's aren't bad, but this gave a whole added dimension of power and maneuverability to the mix instead of just trying to fly straight and adding in some coordinated turns.

In many ways, these flights were a "Create your own roller-coaster" experience. With the added fear that I could actually mess things up and scare myself and the instructor pretty well. I wanted to be good at flying for a novice, to show that I had some innate ability to do it, and I thought I knew a few things about flying. Naturally, I discovered that even with my research and time around planes, there were a lot of nuances and theory to flying that I didn't know. Big surprise there...

The ground school was really fun because it would take what little I knew and would either correct it or would expand on the "why" things were happening. Then putting these things into practice in the air right after the ground lessons was a great way to hammer home the information even though I still didn't do things the way I should in the heat of the moment. I need to go back and do some more flying now that I have had a few days to process the things I wasn't doing well in the practical portion of the flights. I think I could improve on some things, but who knows I may just go out and not be any better at it.

At first, I was really still trying to fly the plane the way we all experience planes. Gently and without pushing things. After a few pointers, I realized that would just have to stop. The plane can handle it, so go ahead and throw it around. I feel bad for the next person that I fly with... Would a normal instructor ground me if I rolled the plane 5 minutes into the lesson?

Let's talk about the plane a bit. As I mentioned, we were flying the Super Decathlon which had two seats in line. Greg would sit in back and probably try not to get sick watching my novice stick and rudder work.

It's a tail-wheel aircraft with a tiny wheel in the back to steer when on the ground, and it had a feel of an older WW2 aircraft. Who am I kidding...It looked like something that I saw in some old movie with tail dragger aircraft, but I have no idea what a WW2 aircraft would feel like...

There were some basic instruments (only a few of which I paid any attention to, Variometer, Altimeter, and Tachometer for the most part) and easy to understand controls. The blue control changes the propeller pitch and the red thingy changes the fuel mixture. Funny thing I noted is that everything that can kill the engine or abruptly stop your plane from flying are denoted in red. Good to know...

It had a high wing and Plexiglas windows on the ceiling which we put to really good use! The majority of the plane was covered in what looked like a type of vinyl cloth aside from the engine cowling and the leading edge of the wing. That way the June bugs and other flying objects don't make big holes in the plane when flying!

I stuck a GoPro on for the flights and found out just how goofy I look under stress and pulling G's. And yes, I mean goofier looking than normal, as a good friend put it earlier this week...

I was able to witness Greg's passion for flying. After putting up with me all day, we put up the Super D and he grins and says, "Hey, you guys want to fly the Cub?", and with that he pushed out another bright yellow plane. We all took turns flying with him around the house. You could tell, he just couldn't get enough of the fun of looping and zooming around. It really was like watching a bunch of kids on Xmas. All of us were having a ball.

Brenna got a chance to go for a ride in a Piper Cub from 1939 or '41, I can't remember which year exactly. A really cool aircraft that Greg uses in his airshow to land on the modified bed of a pickup truck in "The World's Shortest Runway" stunt in the Alabama Boys comedy act.

Brenna and Greg getting ready to go on the Piper Cub.

The Cub climbing hard on Brenna's flight.

We skipped the wheels off the lake in the background, did some loops and even threw the plane into a spin for a few good rotations. I got that on video, so you will get to see it if you haven't already watched the Timewaster Studio's production at the end of this post.

Ok, now I'm getting tired of typing, and I have to fix the dishwasher. So, here are a few other pictures, and we will get on with the video.

Permission to buzz the tower. Negative Ghostrider...the pattern is full...

You knew you couldn't get through the post without a Top Gun quote, right? Well there you go...

One of the most interesting moments was when Greg showed me how to make the plane quit flying. Call it a spin, call it an "aggressive stall compounded by auto-rotation"; it's fun by any name if you have the altitude to play with. Make the plane stall one wing more than the other by putting in full left rudder right as the plane stalls and you will fall out of the sky rapidly in a rotation. One of the coolest things I have ever experienced. To recover it was simple. Just apply opposite rudder to slow the rotation first and then dive out. This spin kills a lot of people, but the problem is that they do it accidentally at low altitude and don't react properly to fix it. There is a lot to be said for learning how to make it happen and recover from it in controlled circumstances.

The spin.

I'm pleased that Greg trusted me enough to fix it to take pictures while we were falling.

I guess I wasn't THAT bad a student...

Looping over the house in the Super D.

Ok, now you have read, or just skimmed...or just scrolled down here once you got bored with the first two paragraphs. Whatever...

The video. I'm sorry the video did get longer than I had planned, but there was so much to put in there that I wanted to share and also remember. I couldn't find a song that would fit with the video that didn't sound lame, and I wanted to hear the engine noise, so this video has the authentic soundtrack from the weekend.

Enjoy.

Aerobatics from Brad on Vimeo.

Links to Greg's site and Sky Country Lodge: http://www.gkairshows.com/Newsite/Training/Training.html

Let There Be Light! The Serfas 1000

2012-10-24T22:21:00.001-05:00

I went on a quick night ride tonight, and since last Friday's night ride was thwarted by a burned out lamp, I had borrowed a demo from the local shop Bike Link. Good people there...pay them a visit.

And now that I'm done with the plug of one of the local bike shops, let's talk lamps.

I demo'd the Serfas 1000 lumen lamp. Compared to the 10 year old halogen lamp I have been using to ride through the winter nights on the Oak Mountain trails, this was a real change. I had no idea how bright these things were. My old lamp (a vintage 2003 Light and Motion Solo Logic MV) must be putting out a whopping 200 lumens now and will last about 2.5 hours. This Serfas will throw off 1000 lumens continuously for 3.5 hours, 650 lumens for 6 hours straight, and up to 21 hours on the lowest level, but who cares about that last one. I'm not planning on riding at the north pole during winter where I would ever need 21 hours straight of lighting.

Holy crap it's like having the sun packed into a bulb on your head. Without all the heat, radiation, and massive prominences of course... I was also told that having a set of stadium lights on my head was quite the conversation starter...

The Niner illuminated!

After spending 2 hours riding around in the woods as fast as I could go... I noted that this lamp may be more effective than my car headlamps. You be the judge.

The Car

The Serfas

More reason to spend time outdoors in the dark! But with less of the dark part!

Lightning Storms

2012-09-04T07:25:00.000-05:00

I got home from a great Labor Day at the lake nervous about the week ahead. Kicking off the budget cycle at work, big meetings, a big birthday party, and loads of important stuff that I haven't finished yet on other fronts as well. I needed something to take my mind off the looming wall of responsibilities...

Well, the evening presented a pretty good excuse to pull out the camera and test my almost 40 year old reflexes...

Of half a zillion pictures and one dead battery pack, I got two. I'm happy with the shots though. This back yard is presenting a pretty spectacular venue for photographs...

Oh, and I lied about the reflexes part... The trick is have very low light conditions, find a storm with lightning...duh, set a camera up on a tripod with a 30 second exposure, grab a chair, keep shooting while watching the storm, and presto! See, honesty in blogging right there folks...

Happy Monday.

1st Day of School

2012-08-27T06:20:00.001-05:00

The kids were up...slowly... It was really early, so I understand. The bus was supposed to arrive at a much more tolerable 6:45am vs the 6:20am at Rocky Ridge.

The big difference this year is that aside from the kids being a year older and much larger is that Aiden had his first day at kindergarten! He got to ride the bus for the first time! The years of him watching from the door as the other two headed out to the bus were over.

The kids decided to trace the cat footprints in the front yard instead of going down the sidewalk. Who wouldn't want soggy shoes and socks in 1st period?

The bus came and before we knew it, they were off and running in a new school year.

2012

Bus pictures through the years *sniff* They are growing too quickly for my tastes, but it's beautiful to see...

I missed 2011's picture because we took them to school that year. The bus came at 6:20am. I would leave with them at 7:15 and get them to school just as the bus arrived.

2010

Ansley's first day...

2009

2008

I hope the year goes well!

Happy Monday everyone.

Human Weapons and wasting time...

2012-08-20T07:49:00.000-05:00

I was wasting time on this new fangled internet thingy the other day and ran across this image. An image of other people wasting time in a field and posting the results on the mostly-junk-filled-interwebs.

Sooo...for those of you who haven't see this yet. I present another example that people with loads of time on their hands are creative and pretty awesome...

You're welcome...

Pride

2012-08-10T21:20:00.001-05:00

I know it's one of those se7en deadly sins, but I do have pride.

Ok, I realize that I just put a somewhat old and disturbing movie reference in a post about good family adventures...I'm apparently on this earth to pass on random thoughts and pseudo-knowledge that roil around in my skull... Now you know what I have to deal with ALL DAY LONG.

ahem... back to Pride...

Pride in one of the things that I know I really should take pride in. My kids. Specifically, one of them in this case.

It has been a long time coming, but Bryce has finally picked up water skiing!

It all happened a few weeks ago. queue up the sappy flashback movie music...

We (being Nathan, Rick and I) had been taking the little kids out on the surfboard behind the boat for the past two summers.

Here is an example of 2011 with Bryce on the surfboard. He was big then...

And Aiden on the board from this year. He tends to spend a lot of time splashing...Perfect.

The small kids are no big deal, and they love it. Plus, riding like that gives them a good feel for how a ski moves, and what it's like to ride one with the security of an adult with them. We got Bryce up on it with us last year on various lake weekends, but when he asked this year. A resounding "NO!" was the answer. Not that we didn't want to, but he is now 5 feet tall and far to large to even bother trying it.

It was unanimous that it was time for him to ride on his own if he wanted to ride at all.

Without further discussion, he hopped in the water and listened to our semi-useful coaching and gave it a whirl. He may be too big to ride with any of us, but his weight gave him a big advantage and he popped right up! Wooot!!!!

I am so happy to have another generation of skiers on the boat! I know that Ansley and Aiden won't be far behind now that Bryce has pioneered the sport for them. On the 4th of July weekend Bryce tried out Wake Boarding for the first time too and after a few tries was making some long runs. As soon as he was up and stable on the board, he was already cutting back and forth inside the wake to learn the control of the board. I'm still smiling at the memory.

He looks like he's having fun!

I'll now treat you to a few awesome shots of Nathan, Rick, and myself from the 4th of July weekend.

Why?

Because they are awesome, and it's my blog! That's why!

My boy Nathan carving up the wake on his new board.

Rick doing what he does. Wowing the crowd and making wake boards look easy to ride...

Back on a ski again after the broken leg. The slalom ski feels pretty good, and its been a while for sure.

And finally, a Timewaster Studio production! I tell you, there is just so much great content on this blog... Why it isn't the most read blog on this interweb thingy, I have no idea...

The really important part is that this is Bryce in his first Timewaster Studio feature! I'm sure it won't be the last!!

Summer WakeSurfing from Brad on Vimeo.
Wake Surfing and Wake Boarding on Lake Lanier, GA.

Have a great weekend!

What are we thinking?

2012-05-19T17:40:00.000-05:00

Man. I break yet another bone, spend gobs of money in the process. The kids are getting bigger, more fun, and more time consuming by the day. I'm in Physical Therapy, but walk like a gangsta on most days with my spectacular limp. I'm working a good job with the budget season coming soon so busy will be the order of the day, and Brenna is trying to get a job teaching again.

Yet, we still decide to pack more into our lives.

Let's buy a house and move in the middle of all of this. Hey, life is short lets fill it up right?

You might ask, good God, why??

Oh, yeah, it'll be worth it.

I hope this works out...

Reasons for Thanks

2012-04-07T06:00:00.001-05:00

I talked with the doctor today and my Fibula has healed well. (with the help of a lot of screws) The Tibia is still awful looking, but I can now put full weight on the leg! When looking at the X-rays, the doctor pointed out several pieces that he said he was literally putting and holding in place with his thumb during surgery. There were so many splinters of bone it was a complete jigsaw puzzle. Bleh. It still looks pretty bad to me, but to the doctor, who honestly is the only one that knows what bad really looks like, it has healed enough for me to walk a couple of weeks in the boot without crutches. After that, I'm free of all this.

Now that I'm limping around without the crutches, I'm thankful for several things, and I'm noticing more and more by the hour. I imagine that I will continue to notice things that I can now do that I just couldn't a day ago.

First of all, I'm thankful for all the people that helped me through the worst of this mess. Thanks to my friends who got me home from Montana, my wife who has since driven me everywhere for the past 9 weeks and has put up with my numerous lows in dealing with this. I also need to give some thanks to the people at work that helped me get through the day when I couldn't carry anything.

Things that I am really happy about:

1. I can walk/limp without crutches. (Now would be the time for one of those awesome pimp costume canes)

2. I can DRIVE again! (I think that Brenna may be the one more thankful in this particular case.) I might hug my Honda when I get home, but the 2 feet of pollen coating it would just make that idea gross.

3. I have been cleared to get back on my spin bike!! While it's not riding through the trees on my favorite possessions, it's a major start down that trail.

4. I can carry my own coffee back to my desk at work without fear of wearing it or endangering others. (one of those small yet oh-so-important elements of every day life)

5. I can walk down stairs instead of scooting down on my rear end. (I won't feel like such an invalid but the kids won't like that I'm harder to catch and climb on.)

I'll stop now, but life is getting back to normal and I feel encouraged that I will be able to do something aside from sit by a pool when I head to the deserts of Nevada and Utah in 6 weeks. Now I have to get stronger, drop some couch surfing weight, and get back to life as normal.

A comparison but not really...

2012-04-04T21:00:00.002-05:00

A fellow co-worker was reading through this blog and compared me to Evel Knievel. Heh Heh...

I enjoy fast paced and somewhat risky sports but I'm hardly a daredevil. Just look at the Red Bull website or any number of GoPro videos if you want to see what I do NOT do. Well, at least things I don't do anymore on the skydiving front...It's official though, I injured myself much less falling out of airplanes/helicopters than I have done in several other sports. I only broke an arm in 10 years and 730 jumps back in my skydiving days. Hence, Skydiving is way safer than wake boarding, road and mountain bike riding, ice skating (lame story), and skateboarding down stairs.

And NO there is absolutely nothing wrong with my statistical sampling there...so just take your mathematics degrees and stuff them.

In the humorous moment of thinking about the comparison of me to Mr. Knievel, I went to the one source that could give me some random trivia for the day. Al Gore's interweb* thingy directed me to this other thingy called Wikipedia, which I guess is becoming the repository for all of human knowledge and will eventually become self aware like Skynet and destroy us all...

Back to my random trivia after a collection of tangents. Sorry.

Evel Knievel broke a lot of bones...and by a lot I mean, “The 433 broken bones he suffered during his career earned an entry in the Guinness Book of World Records as the survivor of "most bones broken in a lifetime."[2]” Wikipedia: Evel Knievel

Holy Cow! How did he even walk after his career was over...or did he? In retrospect, I will probably break bones again since I don't really have an intention of quitting the sports I love, but I hope to hold out for at least a decade before the next skeletal catastrophe. This current one sucks worse than any of my others.

I'll see a doc this week and see if I can actually walk without crutches anytime soon, and I'll badger him to let me on my spin bike. I'll let you all know how it goes.

*No, Al Gore didn't actually claim to invent the Internet...He's just a typically self aggrandizing politician and not very good with phrasing in interviews during an election season.

Ski Whitefish Video!

2012-03-28T21:32:00.000-05:00

Finally, Timewaster Studios has come through with another amazingly-awesomely-mega-super-fantastic video. ah...yes, I'm somewhat biased about Timewaster Studio projects being awesome and all.

I was only slightly bummed that I was sitting on the couch with a shattered leg and unable to actually get footage of the guys myself. (Not that I would have been any better at praying to get a good shot as I hurtled down the slopes than the rest of the crew...but it would have been more fun for me.) Yeah, I'm selfish I guess.

Never fear though my loyal readers and fans of Timewaster Studio projects! I had my friends go out and ski with cameras strapped to them in my stead, and they filmed everything they could until the cold zapped the batteries.

Admittedly, it took me a while to give a rip about editing the video what with the accident and all, but there was some great stuff on there when I got around to editing! Several hours worth of stuff actually. As is the norm for most of my vacations, we had the GoPro's running constantly and the footage adds up.

Well, it's spring now so I'm positive it's the ideal time to get a bunch of hits on a winter ski trip video!

Enough with the rambling intro to this video. I'm sure the gang has been looking forward to it, or they have all forgotten about it due to the length of time that has lapsed. I just hope they didn't fall asleep reading the opening remarks here.

There...I'm done yammering...for now...

Enjoy everyone, and thanks to my good friends for the support!

Whitefish Montana - Post 2

2012-03-26T18:47:00.001-05:00

The group of us had a great day on the slopes. Snow fell off and on throughout the day and there was also some sun that made the powder snow sparkle on the tree lined slopes. The trees themselves were brightened as the light hit the pillows of snow piled on the branches. As I had heard about Montana, "If you don't like the weather, wait a few minutes." It changed constantly from blowing snow and zero visibility to blinding sun and blue skies.

As the second half of the day progressed, the group of us would separate and re-join for a few hours as we all skied and boarded what we could.

I could have used the spiritual help 20 minutes after taking this picture...

On the second to last run Paul and I stopped by to visit Big Mountain Jesus. A statue of Christ that was built to honor members of the U.S. Military 10th Mountain Division, and it has stood there for the past 50 years. As a side note, this memorial has been subject to some legal debate on whether or not to allow it to remain. My opinion is that the local government should have the power to allow or reject the display based on local majority opinion even if it is on "Federal Land". It's not like a 6 foot tall statue on a ski resort mountainside is all that obtrusive and offensive. If you don't like it, either don't look at it or you are free to not ski that run.

Paul, Nathan and I took the last lift up to the top of the mountain as the lifts closed. The clouds had socked in the summit and the wind was whipping snow off the peak. It was a really inhospitable looking place, but our coats and gear just made it fun to look at. It's strange to be standing in a place like that, and to be perfectly encased in clothes that protect you so that you are comfortable even when the world outside would try to kill you in a short period without them. We skirted the peak and looked over the deadly looking drop-offs that were marked as black diamond trails. I really wonder if dropping into one of those trails would have been any worse than what proceeded to happen.

(Important tangent for all you readers: this next part of the trip sucks way worse than the eating heaps and heaps of humble pie as mentioned in the previous post, so if you have to choose...)

Down a trail from the summit,

Smiling,

Friends Nearby,

Laughing,

Wind Rushing,

White Snow Made into Clouds,

Steep Rolling Trail,

Oh, NO!!! Off Balance,

Turn!

Save it! Save It!

A Red Flash.

Black.

Cold snow on my face...

Please, Oh Please, Don't Let It Be Broken...

And that, my friends, is about as choppy and rapid-fire as the last moments of that run feel when I recall them. (and it's painfully obvious from that artful bit of writing that I'm not an English Major either, but I never wanted to have a job that required me to ask "Do you want fries with that?")

Paul was first there and Nathan shortly afterwards to help as he had to come back up the slope a bit to reach me.

I knew it was broken. The leg moved in a way it shouldn't when I shifted it. The concern on both their faces was evident. Paul stayed with me and Nathan rocketed down the slopes to tell the Ski Patrol, and from that point began the one of the most limiting and agonizing injuries I have ever had. Agonizing not so much related to the pain, but more related to my need to move and the need to be independent. I am trapped for a time in a body that won't let me do what I want to do.

The Erector Set

I sat in the snow for about 20 minutes with Paul watching up the slope to warn anyone coming down that we were in the way. The Ski Patrol arrived (without the trumpet fanfare I had imagined for some reason) and they were skilled and really wonderful people. We actually had a couple of laughs as they splinted me and loaded me in the sled. We were so far out on the mountain that they couldn't get a snowmobile up to me. They helped me slide into some form of sled and strapped me in. I was covered in a vinyl tarp to keep snow from flying in my face as they towed me. We were flying down the mountain from what I could tell, and the sled would pitch violently from side to side as the terrain changed. That rolled me several times onto the broken leg. I could hear the guy say, "Sorry man." when it happened. There wasn't much to do aside from just deal with it.

When we arrived at a ski lift somewhere along the trail, (I don't know which since I was totally disoriented by the sled ride) they attached the sled to a chair and sent us up the lift to where a snowmobile could reach me and tow me to the clinic. I don't ever want to have to make that trip again. Having a broken leg and getting tossed around in a coffin like sled was the stuff that nightmares are made of.

Nathan got this picture before we decided to pull off the ski boot. Looking back on it, I should have paid for the boot right then and there and had someone destroy it cutting it off my leg rather than what we did. It took two people to stretch the boot open as much as possible and then we all pulled.

Take my word for it. Don't ever do that

Nathan hung with me when I made decision to pull the boot off my broken leg in the clinic. The medic's comment about "You Bama boys are tough." when it was over did make me feel a bit better. I'm sure he has had the opportunity to see the worst in people when they are in pain.

Feeling better with my brand new full leg cast...and loads of pain medication...

The things I have learned and will now pass on to you so you don't have to do this stuff for yourselves:

Seriously people, please learn this stuff on your own from here on out. I'm done being the example.

If you are skiing and find yourself saying, "Hey, I'm tired, but I have one more run in me." At that moment you are supposed to just stop and come back tomorrow. Always leave wanting more. I believe that this rule may apply to many other sports that risk injury.

Unfortunately, I learned this lesson at the end of the first day of the trip, and after a lovely night in the hospital, I was back in the Lodgepole house where we were staying.

I want to take the time to give my absolute appreciation to all the guys on the trip (Paul, Nathan, John, Way, Carper, and Andy) You guys are true friends and were wonderful to have around helping out after my accident. I can't say enough good things. It really meant a lot to have your company, daily ski stories, and assistance while I was there. When I get out of this cast and can move again, I'm going to throw a massive party. Carper...Uh...plane tickets? I may have to delay catching up with you until I can make it out to Colorado. It will happen though.

I also have to thank my wife and friends at the office for helping me out now that I have gone on for 2 months without writing about this incident. I owe my wife a trip to Hawaii or something since she has been driving me everywhere for the past 8 weeks...if I can ever save up enough after paying for the erector set leg.

Way and John on the lift...Twins? Nah...

I will have the video up in the next post, and I think it came together pretty well.

Thanks again everyone.

Snow in Whitefish (This was written a long time ago now)

2012-03-03T22:23:00.005-06:00

I am an active person to say the least. I am apparently also a fragile person (skeletally). Which is a seriously messed up combination when I think about it. I mean, how screwed up is it to have the desire to do the sports I do and then have a skeleton that shatters like so much glass when I make a mistake?

I went on my first serious snow ski trip with a group of guys as I noted in a few of my previous posts. It was stellar. The flight out, the beauty of the mountain. The vast amounts of snow. Trees coated with white powder so thick that they didn't even look real. It was everything I had imagined. But...there were a couple of points that didn't quite go as well as I had hoped.

Point #1: Humble Pie:

I don't like humble pie. It tastes like a big pile of steaming....well you get the idea. I went to Montana with aspirations of being able to pick up snowboarding like I have many other activities. Pretty quickly and easily. I mean, all those guys riding on the snowboard videos make it look easy! I didn't have the right mindset, and the mountain knew it. Nathan was very patient and stayed with me on what had to be the steepest "bunny slope" that could be imagined. Not that it mattered. His instruction was good. My execution was pitiful. I rode the lift up, and then fell. (Not right under the lift like I had worried, but finding myself not being able to stop I had to do something...) I then put the boots in place on the board and promptly fell over. I also found that when I put the snowboard in the direction I wanted to go it went -- and by "went" I mean accelerating to 400 mph with only meager inklings of control. *crash*

Out of my element.

I was seriously frustrated on the first run. The second run was better although I nearly hit the lift tower on my descent. That run showed promise, but as soon as I threw the board into a toe side turn I found myself face up with my ears ringing. All the while I was thinking, "I could do back flips on a wake board, why is this so difficult?"

The third run had me gasping like a person that hasn't ever worked out in his/her life, but I could stop myself and turn for the most part. Oh, and crash. I had that crashing part of the lesson NAILED!! Yeah baby! Nathan didn't even have to teach me anything. I was good at it like I was born to do it. sigh...

We then took the lift to the top of the mountain. There was no way I going to give into the fact I had only 3 short runs on a snowboard under my belt and should have given in and just taken the day on the bunny slope. If I was going to embarrass myself and spend time beating my body into snowbanks, I wanted to have a long run of it.

My vision was sparkling with the lack of oxygen and the panic of realizing that I had no business going up to the top. The summit was socked in with clouds and blowing snow. Visibility of maybe 20 yards at best. Nathan and I managed to get lost even at the slow pace we were keeping. He seemed to make his turns so effortlessly, and I was flailing around with my heart maxed out at 185bpm and sweating up a storm. It turns out my first run down the mountain was on an intermediate blue trail that included sheer looking drop offs and loads of trees and narrow ski paths. Wild times.

I crashed hard toward the bottom (for the bajillionth time) and bruised my knee. I was done with the snowboard for the day on the 4th run. Of course, I have some of my horrible performance on video, but the one part that I am really proud of I don't. In the last segment of the run, we found the terrain park and some pure powder snow. I actually hopped up on one of the wooden box slider features and rode it across and followed that up with 3-4 great sweeping turns on the board as I came to the end of the run. It really felt good, and for 30 seconds, it looked like I knew what I was doing on a snowboard. There is actually something to snowboarding that could be a blast if I practiced a little more.

At that point, I had eaten enough humble pie though for the day. I traded in my snowboard for skis so I could ride the whole mountain with the rest of the gang that we had out there. I planned on swapping back to the board in the morning and spending more time on the bunny slope. Everyone else in the group was skiing and had been all over the mountain and had great stories of all the places I hadn't been yet.

Off we went.

The blue trails were amazing and the black diamond trails weren't trails. These so-called black diamonds were just sheer cliffs inviting a swift and sudden death. Around us were vast scenes of Flathead valley and Whitefish Lake thousands of feet below, and the sun would glint off the lake and illuminate the clouds that clung to the mountain. Even on the intermediate blue trails, allegedly gently sloping runs had a tendency to just disappear in front of you. After a moment, you would realize that the trail didn't end, it just got that steep. I skied pretty well and felt confident doing it. I determined it was a great idea to split the day between the board and skis.

Whitefish lake below on an intermediate slope...

I have written and re-written this post several times now. Not that it would make any difference to someone reading my stream of consciousness gibberish. My attempts have gone from Negative to Positive to Pitiful, so I have decided to bail and give you a partial story. You know... a cliff hanger...where the hero gets away, and the girl, and wins, and all that bull...

Ah, the bitterness... Time to stop writing again... It's taken me over a month to get this much together... I hope you enjoy this blog...

The video is coming soon. It also took me a month to even think about watching the stuff. The Timewaster Studios project is close to complete, and it's a positive and fun piece. I promise to get it up soon.

I'll leave you with the start of the last run of the day. We had skied all over the mountain and decided make a run as the lifts were closing.

cue the ominous music...

Snow, Hikes , Math references, and Rocks... Intrigued? No wait! Come Back!!!

2012-01-19T06:44:00.000-06:00

Yes it's true. Snow will slow down a good hike in a big way. I mean who can possibly go post-holing through hip deep snow and keep the same pace as one would during summer? Well, while this first statement is completely true, it's not what happened to us. We only had an epic amount of 4 inches of snow to deal with, but I'll maintain that our hike was slow-motion-ified even by this minute amount of white.

How could such a short and fun hike be so slow?

Well, there were a couple of important factors which I will outline in one of the most important mathematical equations seen in years. If you discount little ones like Relativity and Gödel’s Incompleteness Theorem...

Children from the deep south + Snow = snail like progress and constant mischief

The sound of the kids yelling "POW POW Freshies!!!" echoed through the forest whenever they found untracked snow in a clearing. As to the Pow Pow Freshies joke, you would understand if you watched loads of stupid snowboarding shows featuring overpaid 19-year-olds skiing impossible lines off cliff faces and speaking some form of ski-bum slang that I find amusing.

The kids stopped as often as dogs on a walk. Picking up and throwing snow at each other was the real order of the day, so we were moving at about a mile an hour. (that's a generous speed estimate there...)

Here is Brenna with her patient face on. This was required because every few steps Aiden, without looking, would just chuck a snowball over his head toward anyone behind him. You had to be paying attention or you were going to have it on your head. He thought this was the funniest thing he had come up with...EVER.

We also discovered Aiden was putting the snowballs in his pockets to save them. He was soaked pretty quickly but seemed completely immune to the chill. There is something about kids and snow that makes them not notice temperature.

An example of the sneak attack snowball.

Notice that Ansley was not in any of the fight pictures. She wisely avoided her brothers to avoid becoming collateral damage.

As the snowball fights raged on, we were actually on a hike. The idea, at least, was that we were heading up to Arch Rock in the Smoky Mountain National Park.

The hike followed a stream up to the arch which had been carved out of the limestone and shale over millions of years. It was very different than the examples we had seen in Utah's sandstone. The rocks that made up the arch had a thin layered sedimentary look to it rather than looking like the arch was carved out of a more uniform piece of rock. Each layer was .5-1 inch thick and looked really jagged where softer stone had been eroded away leaving the harder layers exposed.

We had to cross the creek we were following a few times and the kids loved the log bridges that we had to use. I was just happy I didn't have to pluck a soggy child out of the creek...

We found the trail actually passed through the arch itself and we had to climb a wet and slippery series of stone steps to reach the other side. The arch is almost hidden from view by trees so there wasn't a good spot to actually get a photograph of the entire structure. Here is Ansley descending back through the arch.

It was a 3 mile hike and took us just under 3 hours to complete, and I think with all the smiles that it was exactly the right speed.

Christmas - New Years and SNOW!

2012-01-11T06:30:00.000-06:00

We did things a little differently this year...well not the part about being nearly killed by the avalanche of presents Christmas morning. In the line of thought from the rapidly approaching ski trip, I might recommend the adoption of a Christmas Present Mountain Avalanche Rating/Warning System for the next Christmas season. We wouldn't want anyone hurt or lost on such a festive occasion. We could even practice Rescue and Recovery techniques prior to Christmas morning just in case. You never know, and you just can't be too safe, Right?

Wow...now just look at that digression in all its brilliant glory.

Now for a few photos to move the story along...or perhaps this post is going to turn into a slideshow rather than having much of a "story". whatever...

Opa reading The Night Before Christmas to the eager and attention span challenged children...

The stack of presents was phenomenal... Hence my commentary on needing avalanche rescue training...

To keep the focus on the fact that it was Christmas and that we were there to celebrate the birth of Jesus, there was a Nativity play that the kids starred in. No theater nerves among this crowd...

And no...the Nativity didn't include Iron Man... No matter how much Aiden may have wanted it to...

We did things a little differently this year. Normally will gather for Christmas in Atlanta, and have a great time hanging around with the family and extended family. The unusual part was that we didn't head to play a ton of golf in Myrtle Beach or Florida. We opted to head for the mountains instead!

Admittedly, I was a bit unsure of going to try to find snow in the deep south in December. Normally, we bundle up with our heaviest coats for the two days that might be considered remotely winter-ish elsewhere in the country, so snow doesn't normally even cross our minds. We took off for Gatlinburg Tennessee at the base of the Great Smoky Mountain National Park (Which turned out to be a place that I am definitely going to return to for some summer hiking.)

Look out Floridian drivers on ice...there should have been some warning flares or something...

I kept laughing to myself about our retired "Floridians" on the trip when they encountered snow. Perhaps, I wasn't laughing to myself, because Brenna kept punching me in the shoulder saying, "Hey, That's my Dad!"

But we all know the story about when Bill put our van into orbit in Mexico on the speed bumps there,

so who knows what might have come to pass on that snowy road.

Yep, that joke is still funny...and I'm probably not getting invited back anytime soon!

Lo and behold the morning was cold and the peaks of the pass we had to cross had been hit with a storm that put down about 5 inches of snow the night before.

Who would have thought!

And you would have thought the kids had died and gone to heaven. We had to stop the car and got out to let the kids experience this interesting white stuff that they see so infrequently because they were trying to gnaw their way out through the car door panels, and my orthodontic bills are going to be high enough in the coming years. I didn't want to find out how much fixing the car upholstery would be on top of straightening their teeth too.

You can imagine that it took about exactly .000267 seconds before someone began chucking snowballs...

Here is Bryce trying to decide if the repercussions of pegging me with a snowball were worth it...he didn't think long before pounding me with it and running!

Par for the course. Family portrait with only one of the kids even remotely paying attention.

The house we stayed at was a cool place perched on the side of the mountain overlooking Gatlinburg. I could really see that we would have had some trouble getting there if the roads had iced at all, but we were OK there closer to town. The snow line was probably above 4 thousand feet, so the white coated the tops of the mountains around us, but not the roads we had to navigate.

The kids loved the fact they had to walk through snow that stayed on the porch to get to the hot tub. Livin' large...

I loved the view from the back porch and spent quite a bit of time just looking over the rail at the town and the Smokies.

I'll pause here in an effort to keep this somewhat short enough. I'll post up the account of our snowy hike out to Arch Rock next, but I needed to get writing on this before it faded from memory and I ran headlong into the rest of the year.

There is some real beauty in this country surprisingly close to my house...

I hope you all had a great holiday season!

Hey That Looks Sour!

2012-01-09T06:51:00.001-06:00

Bryce was at a friend's birthday party, and afterwards, as is the custom it seems these days, everyone got a goodie bag. This bag happened to have candy in it, and Bryce picked out one small green or blue candy and looked to me and said, "That looks sour! I should try it." My response was something like, "You bet you should, but let me get my camera out first."

Here, my friends are the results of that piece of candy represented in three photos. The progression is pretty funny.

Anticipation:

2: Oh! Now what have I done???

3: AAAAAAAAAAAAAKKKKK!

That's my boy. I'm sure he will eat more of those things in the future, but perhaps it will be a while if he sees these pictures.

Excited about Snow 2000 miles from here...

2011-12-16T12:39:00.000-06:00

The group is set and the trip is planned. I'm going to try my hand (or feet, hands and face in reality) at SnowBoarding at the end of January. After spending exactly zero time on snow skis in the past 18 years, and two days skidding down an ice sheet that passes for snow here in the Appalachian mountains prior to that, this should be interesting.

It sounds like, from the blogs and other reports, everyone out west is complaining that the snow hasn't come yet. That there is "barely anything" that is open. They certainly haven't spent time in the deep south. I even ran into a mountain biker at Oak Mountain this weekend that said he was taking his climbing gear out to Colorado on his trip in a couple of weeks because there wasn't any "serious" snow yet and he might get bored. (I guess he skis a fairly significant amount by that statement.)

At the end of the post is a video filmed yesterday December 15th from Whitefish, Montana where we will be going.

The resort is a pretty small one from what I can tell when compared to the Disneyland versions out in Utah, Colorado, and California, but small isn't bad. It means short lift lines, lower prices, and a laid back small town atmosphere with more locals vs. fighting millions on the slopes as I try to learn to stay upright on a board.

I like the idea of being out in nowhereville, which is probably why I like hiking/mountain biking in Utah so much.

Anyway, the early season complaints I hear prompted me to look at the SkiWhitefish.com website and I found this video.

If that's "early season" and not really great conditions, I'll be just fine with it. With 5 weeks more snow before we get there, this trip is going to really open my eyes to what can be done outdoors. I can remember seeing 8 inches of snow once in my life. They get an average of 300 inches a year out there. This is a place where you ski by a short bush and find that it was actually the top of a 30 foot tall pine.

Enjoy.

www.Skiwhitefish.com

The Leaves

2011-11-19T10:39:00.001-06:00

Every fall the trees around my house conspire to hide my lawn from me and to create a whole bunch of work. The question is how do I make this entertaining? Because it's not... No matter what your Dad told you about raking being good for you.

One thing about our years in Florida is that I never had to rake anything. The odd palm frond would fall, but that's about it. A single 10lb frond is much easier to manage when compared to an endless supply of biomass falling from the old oaks around our house.

Well, in an attempt to entertain myself, goof off with the kids, AND rake this year, I decided to make a video. We discovered the joys of back-yard bobsledding with a kids scooter toy a while back, and coupling that with a leaf pile seemed like a fine idea.

As a side note, me falling down in the leaves is not graceful, but hardly something that I wouldn't post. In slow-motion no less. Because, that's what this blog is about; entertaining my friends and family. Of course, the reality is that my audience is probably getting smaller after my inconsistent posting and silly videos.

Aiden-isms

2011-11-19T06:59:00.000-06:00

My youngest has been a wealth of laughs in his 4 years, and I wanted to put a post together to share some of his top comments.

Upon seeing a small tree with a cage around it to stop deer from eating it he came up to me and with a completely sincere face said, "Look Dad! They caught that one!" and then ran off to continue playing.

Riding in the car home from a camping trip. The kids were playing a spelling game. Aiden had to spell some simple word that has slipped my mind. His answer? K...uh...R...uh...ZERO!!! *Laugh's hysterically* Ah, I hope he gets a good education...

Holding an empty box of waffles up to his face and looking into it. (He does enjoy a good frozen waffle.) I said that looking into the empty box won't may any more appear in there, and he said, "That's ok. I'm invisible!!!"

The kids and I were scrambling down the stairs to the car so I could take them to school. (Just like every other day) We found that Aiden had already climbed in and buckled himself. His hair was sticking up in all directions, he was wearing his backpack (while being buckled) and still had on his fuzzy pajamas, but he was ready to go to the Big Kids school.

A friend gave us a box of Krispy Kreme Doughnuts. (A friend that doesn't care about our dietary health it would seem, or was trying to save themselves from the call of the junk food.) er.... Either way, we had doughnuts and Aiden spotted them, grabbed the box, set it on the table in front of him, and asked, ever so politely, "Dad, can I ONLY have two?" before I had a chance to even say anything. Only two? Odd phrasing, but I guess it's better than just licking them all and saying, "Oops, I guess I'll just have to eat everything.

Parenting. It's good stuff