The Man Up Blog

Modern Physical Attraction: (Un)Importance of Physical Appearance & Building Your Image

2011-08-02T07:52:00.000-07:00

This is actually a fairly complex topic to address, which will definitely require more than one post, for one VERY important fact that many men aren't aware of. The truth is this;

The physical appearance of a man is almost completely irrelevant when it comes to attraction, unless he is horribly ugly or extremely aesthetic/good-looking.

And when I say "horribly ugly" I mean something like..

.....That.

And when I say "extremely aesthetic/good-looking" I mean something like....

....This.

But that is the honest truth. Women may at times nitpick in the gray-area in between repulsive/model-status, but in general it really doesn't matter at all.

The only true benefit of being extremely good looking when it comes to attraction is that the man starts off at a bit of an advantage. They're a bit "ahead of the game" in the sense that a woman has, upon seeing a man, determined he is likely to possess furthermore attractive traits.

In today's world, everything has an association. Women associate status, success, wealth, confidence, and other societal values in an attractive man; because that's how they've been portrayed in society.

What images come to mind with an extremely overweight, acne-covered, ungroomed guy? Basement dweller? Awkward, uninteresting, unmotivated? almost apathetic and emotionless in a sense because women have not had any social grooming which has led them to believe attractive traits are found in unkempt fat guys.

And I'll be the first to say of course the logic is flawed; but that's just the way the world is. There are plenty of useless attractive guys, and lots of brilliant and interesting big guys out there. But from a still photograph a girl will never be able to tell.

So what does that mean for the majority of guys who fall in between those two groups? I mean realistically, most guys aren't about to be on GQ or crushing themselves in their own weight, so what do they face?

They're honestly pretty much just as in a good of a position as the GQ-guys. The problem is they just don't know it.

Most guys think if a girl doesn't show obvious and open interest, she is not attracted and will not be attracted to him. If everyone had that mindset the human population would come to a screeching halt.

So what does the initial contact mean? It sure as hell isn't going to be some Disney/chick flick shit where everyone is down to fuck upon setting eyes on each other. Well except for the guys. But the fact is when a generally normal looking guy meets a girl, he is a blank slate.

This is ideal. Some could argue that it is in fact more ideal than being extremely attractive and giving girls expectations because in this economy, let's keep it real, bitches be golddiggin' for good looking well-off guys. When you're a blank slate, you create your own expectations. Your actual interaction with a girl will trigger all kinds of thoughts in her head as to what you're all about.

There are actually three categories that appear on your "blank slate" when a girl is assigning you characteristics.

1. Pros - All the awesome shit about your badass self. This is the moneymaker column and what has to be stacked to the brim with everything that is amazing about you, starting with general traits like confidence and social skills and ending further on with interesting hobbies or facts about yourself.

2. Cons - All your bullshit. Everything from being an annoying whiny bitch to a psychotic bipolar motherfucker goes here. The more cons you have, the less your pros matter. A regular con will probably cancel about 2-4 pros. Which also brings me to the severity of the cons; it doesn't matter how funny/interesting/successful you might be if she thinks you might be a serial killer.

3. Non-Threatening/"Friendzone" Traits - These aren't as bad as cons; but they will fuck your shit when it comes to appearing attractive to women. These are your common "shy guy" qualities; quiet, nervous, awkward, shy, timid etc. These traits tell a girl you aren't going do shit except maybe redecorate her place/do her homework/get mani-pedi's together. This is where most guys fail. They only see their pros and cons but don't pay attention to their seemingly neutral traits that kill attraction. And instead of addressing the true issue at hand guys will turn around and start spouting shit about how its because "I don't have washboard abs" or some other trivial physical bullshit.

Point being? Know how to present yourself in a respectable and attractive manner. That "just be yourself" shit is for settlers/quitters/assclowns. That advice is straight up weaker than Kim Kardashian's singing career. The true statement is actually "be your ultimate self." Learn how to integrate the best of your actual self into your presentation; don't go off of some cookie-cutter pick-up artist bullshit. And I'm not going to sit here and say everyone is perfect just as they are (though most people are fine and are really just too self-conscious); I can't diagnose you as an awesome or lame person, but if you or someone close to you that you trust thinks you need to make some adjustments in your life you should probably consider it. And by that I mean fucking do it. Because unless you are at your core awesome, everything mentioned and will be mentioned doesn't concern you because you either A. can't/won't step up your game or B. would simply be deceiving people into thinking you're an awesome person temporarily until they realize you're full of shit (see: pick-up artist).

I'll be continuing this on my next post(s) and will go into more detail in regards to important qualities and how to portray them, along with common unmasculine/unattractive mannerisms and their manly counterparts.

I'll also address the physical appearance aspect a bit more later as well. Probably should've done it in this post but I'm tired. Also, I don't give a fuck.

Modern Physical Attraction: Non-Manly

2011-07-22T15:15:00.000-07:00

Let me start off this section by saying not all women are attracted to the physical appearance of the manly man.

Only the ones you should want.

Now I'm generalizing here; but hey that's how shit gets explained.

When I say "only the ones you should want", I'm not giving a big "fuck you" to every girl that isn't into a masculine appearance in their partners.

What I am doing is giving you, the man, a fucking WARNING. I mean SOUND THE ALARM, POP OFF THE FLARES, SEND OUT THE S.O.S. Whatever it takes. Because a woman not attracted to masculinity is a sign SOMETHING HAS GONE WRONG.

Women are genetically composed and inherently geared towards attraction to masculinity. I didn't make it that way, you didn't make it that way; that's just how it happened. So when a girl is going against nature you need to be aware that something is off. Now this isn't necessarily to put blame on the girl; most of the psychological issues and factors that play into a woman's attraction are subconscious and are a result of past experiences. Don't expect the girl who got abused, taken advantage of, assaulted, or otherwise traumatized by a man/men in her life to be attracted to strong masculine men. Some may take the route of subconscious attraction to those men, but many don't. Instead they shut down emotionally and push away those men in fear as a defense mechanism.

So those girls are going to be attracted to weaker guys; for the simple fact that they feel they need the control and the power.

Example #1:

Apparently this is where the NBC Peacock likes to reside when its feeling a little dark.

Example #2:

"My shirt could not possibly be more ironic."

Example #3:

Is it just me or does his jacket say LADY....

Alright I've had enough googling "skater/emo/scene guys" to last a lifetime. Now let's assess the above for a second.

Similarities between the examples:

1. Long/Styled hair - Longer/more styled hair is associated with females; shorter/simpler hair is associated with males. Fairly simple concept.

2. Posture/Poise - All 3 examples, in three different positions, are in non-dominant poses. Both 2 and 3 have raised eyebrows, which is a sign of submission and illustrates how non-threatening they are. And 1's hands... just look at them.

3. Lack of Imposing Physique/Presence - None of the above have an imposing body frame by nature; so they are at a disadvantage there. To supplement this, they simply don't possess the power of presence. I honestly feel I could run any of these three over with my niece's tricycle.

4. Piercings - Piercings are in general considered a female practice. And really I can accept an ear or two or whatever from some guys but lips/eyebrows/nose/etc piercings just scream "I wish I could afford that sex change" to me.

These are just a few details noticeable through the photos; mannerisms really explain so much more which I will get into later.

But the point is, there are girls attracted to the above guys because of their overly-feminized appearances. It connects more with them, and they feel safer and in more control. When in actuality guys who dress as such tend to be the most unstable-pill-popping-passive-aggressive motherfuckers around.

Enough on that though.

I think I should also take a moment to address teenagers as their situation is similar to the aforementioned.

I say this because girls in junior high/high school are not yet normally attracted to the characteristics of men. As girls have to ease into attraction; they can't be thrown into the deep end full of strong confident aggressive facial-haired men (not that there's much of a pool of those out there at that age). There are in essence 2 types of guys teenage girls are attracted to.

1. Cute/Pretty boys - Justin Bieber Syndrome. Feministic, non-threatening, relatable, and easy transitioning from female companions to male companions. Need I say more?

2. "Bad" boys - Teenage girls are new to attraction and relationships and are quick to realize that "bad boys" give the most emotional excitement and rush. They provide plenty of drama to satisfy any teen girl by giving relationship "highs" and "lows".

Although to the credit of females, there are girls who are attracted to masculine guys at those ages; there just aren't a ready supply of masculine teenagers as they're still going through puberty. But to those awesome teenage girls (and guys who man up quick), who embrace masculinity and masculine traits early on; God bless. You will be the better for it because while your girl friends go out with boys that get stopped trying to go into PG-13 movies and constantly lying/cheating/abusing douchebags; you're going to be too busy being awesome and happy with your man friend. And jealous bitches are going to be hating.

The thing about all these other non-manly attractions is, in general, they never last and girls grow out of them. There are some girls who get stuck in certain phases of attraction and they are the ones with the most issues that you want to avoid anyways.

In general though, the ideal man can get virtually any girl he so chooses. I'm not saying it's always going to be given on a platter, but a true man can create attraction with almost any woman.

In my next post; I will go into the physical attraction of masculinity. So ladies bring the replacement panties because there's going to be some manly fucking men up in that bitch. Guys; just a notepad.

The Intro

2011-07-21T21:39:00.000-07:00

This is the man blog right here.

Why man blog? Because shit son; there just aren't enough real men in the world.

Too often nowadays guys just don't have their shit together. Back in the days when women were accepted to be "below men", it seems it was only natural for men to be more dominant and assertive as it was pretty much a right they were born into. But that shit ain't right; and women's rights were put into place and a shift to equality was made, as it should have been. Let me also make it clear that this isn't some sexist "men are so much more awesome than women" shit blog where I stroke myself to the idea of a world where men control their wives that live out of their kitchen. I love and respect women in every way that they deserve respect; and I will delve on that topic later on. My point is; as women, for the most part, have reached men as their social equals, men have recessed in masculinity.

Everyday I see the same bullshit. Weak, overly sensitive, overly emotional, needy guys. No strength, no confidence, just shells of men. It's come to the point where guys have become just as emotionally driven as women; which is a scary thought. And boy do they have excuses; as per the following:

"Kids were mean to me growing up."
"My family wasn't supportive."
"A girl broke my heart/permanently scarred my vag."
"I was just born like this."
"I'm fat/ugly/stupid/useless/more self-pitying shit."

Not to belittle people or their feelings or what has happened in their life; but all of those excuses are invalid. Not because they may not be true or have any legitimacy; but because EVERYONE HAS HAD FUCKING ISSUES. Let me say that again.

EVERYONE has had fucking issues.

Noone will claim a perfect childhood and/or adolescence. I mean fuck, guys have to go through puberty... that shit is never pretty. So to say your past must define the person you are now and will be is absolute dickshit.

And after listening to countless stories and watching guys be flat out pathetic right in front of my eyes; I've decided to take matters into my own hands. I can't stand idly by as my species slowly but surely infuses genders.

So guys interested in taking their shit up to a whole new level and women interested in strong/confident/passionate/amazing men stand the fuck by.

Because it's going down and shit is about to get serious.