joel mayward

Three Years in Scotland and Counting: A Mayward Family Update

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Sun, 01 Nov 2020 11:19:00 +0000

It's been over a year since my previous post, a year full of turmoil, ordeals, and unexpected grace. Our family envisioned 2020 as a year full of travel and adventure. Katie had plans to visit northern Italy in March with some St Andrews friends. I was going to New York for a church-and-film symposium, and had five different papers accepted to academic conferences, which would take our family to Amsterdam, Toronto, Boston, and various UK locations. I had plans to visit Belgium and France in order to interview the filmmakers I'm studying, Jean-Pierre and Luc Dardenne, as well as to visit archives to examine materials from the brothers' earliest films. I had won competitive travel grants from the University of St Andrews and the American Academy of Religion in order to cover the costs for these various trips. For Christmas 2019, I gave Katie a new travel tote bag, and she gave me a new wallet and passport carrier. I had plans to submit my PhD thesis in Spring 2020 in order to be ready for the academic job market and perhaps begin at a new post in Fall 2020.

Then there was a global pandemic, and all the plans had to change. Since March, our family has remained entirely within St Andrews; we've barely traveled more than a mile or two from our house. As we've watched the various tragic events occurring around the globe—the spreading coronavirus and the US government and culture failing to handle it; the environmental disasters of floods and fires; the political injustices and unrest perpetuated against Black and brown lives in the US and beyond; the impending US presidential election and the disturbing ideologies it has revealed within American Christianity—I think we have felt a bit estranged from it all due to our present social location. Living in a small town on the Scottish coast feels like an isolated sanctuary from the rest of the world, for better and for worse. And so we pray and protest in spirit, at a distance from it all, yet still affected in our hearts and souls. Our world has undergone a collective trauma, and it will take time and patience for us all to heal.

For the most part, our past year has been rather peaceful and uneventful, filled with playing in our back garden, roasting marshmallows over a fire pit, and sharing in conversation over meals as a family (plus a lot of Netflix). The kids essentially had a long summer break, and have been back in school this autumn season in person, with a few minor COVID-related breaks for isolation or quarantine. Katie has begun part-time graduate studies at the University of Edinburgh in the Global Health Challenges degree program, which has been a wonderful step in her vocational journey; I'm so proud of her as she pursues her dreams. My PhD thesis at the Institute for Theology, Imagination and the Arts is essentially complete. I plan to submit this upcoming February, in anticipation of a successful viva by May and graduation in June. In the meantime, I continue to work on writing projects—particularly an academic monograph on philosophical theology and the cinema of Christopher Nolan (contracted with Lexington Books/Fortress Academic, forthcoming 2022)—and submitting applications for higher ed jobs and post-doc appointments.

What does the future hold? We simply don't know. We continue to make plans, but we hold those plans loosely, striving to be present in the moment with our kids and celebrating the good and beautiful where we can find it. We're taking each day as it comes, all in the hope that Christ will guide our way.

Two Years in Scotland: A Mayward Family Update

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Mon, 09 Sep 2019 14:21:00 +0000

That it's been an entire year since my last blog post is indicative of the kind of year it's been: full. Full of travels. Full of projects. Full of teaching and learning. Full of work and rest. A life of the abundant.

I turn 35 today. For some reason, it has me feeling more nostalgic and self-reflective about the nature of life, death, time, and existence than turning 30 did. Maybe it's due to reading way too much theology and philosophy in my PhD research. Or maybe it's just the natural consequences of the aging process. In either case, I've been reminiscing a lot about the last five years, and dreaming about what the next five hold for our family as we strive to live a great story together.

Five years ago, I wrote a reflection on turning 30, where I made a list of 30 goals for the next decade of my life. I wrote that blog post while living in Canada, still a pastor at a local church in Langley. So much has happened since then, and so much has changed for me, both internally and externally. Looking back on the list, there are some entries I would like to change or abandon altogether, replacing them with newfound interests and dreams (or theological beliefs). There are also so many goals I've actually experienced or accomplished that it feels, quite literally, like a dream come true. It seems a lot can happen in five years, and it's heartening to recall them not with regret or remorse, but with a sense of gratitude and hope.

This past year, members of our family traveled to Finland, Norway, the Isle of Skye, the Cannes film festival in France, Monaco, Switzerland, Iceland, and a week in London (I'm probably forgetting some travel locations—we did a lot together). We also went back to the Portland, OR area for the first time since moving to Scotland, where I taught a seminary course at Portland Seminary (George Fox University) and served as a chaplain/instructor at Theologia, a high school summer theology institute at GFU. I've also written and published number of book reviews and peer-reviewed journal articles, as well as worked as a tutor (one step above a T.A., one step below a professor) in the Divinity school at the University of St Andrews. Overall, life in St Andrews is peaceful and joyful for our family, and truly feels like home.

I'll let the pictures of the past year share our story thus far. In all this, we're thankful for the adventure we're living, both to our friends and family and to the God in Christ we continue to worship and follow.

Mayward Family, Autumn 2018

Christmas, 2018

Katie and Eloise in Finland, Winter 2019

Oslo, Winer 2019

Isle of Skye, Spring 2018

Urquhart Castle and Loch Ness, Spring 2019

Cannes, May 2019

Cannes Film Festival, May 2019

Cousins in the Pacific Northwest, Summer 2019

Teaching at Theologia, George Fox University, Summer 2019

Iceland, Summer 2019

London, Summer 2019

One Year in Scotland: Mayward Family Update

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Sat, 08 Sep 2018 17:14:00 +0000

As of September 5, we've lived in St Andrews for an entire year. Three hundred and sixty five days of living in Europe has been, in a word, wonderful. Sure, it's had its hardships and complications, but living on the coast of Scotland has been a peaceful, life-giving experience for our whole family.

Our new home

When we arrived in St Andrews, we moved into a 2-bedroom bungalow in a great neighborhood near our kids’ school. The space is cozy, and the lease was for 9 months, so we knew we’d have to move again, likely farther away from school and town. Providentially, a kind neighbor connected us with the owner of the house next door to ours, the one we’d been looking at out our kitchen window all this time. Two months later, the gracious owners had decorated and upgraded the house with our family in mind, and we moved in to our new house in St Andrews in May, twice the space for the same rental price. We hope to stay here the remainder of our time in Scotland, and we’re excited to use the space to host friends and family (so if you're hoping to come visit us, we have a bed for you!). We’re delighted and grateful for God’s provision, and eager for this new season in our new home. It's so spacious, and the garden is great for having three growing kiddos.

Paris together, July 2018

This past July, I had the opportunity to take a French language immersion course in Paris. Having applied for and receiving a bursary/scholarship, the entire family was able to spend a month in the City of Lights (well, technically we stayed in Montrouge, a suburb right on the southern border of Paris itself). I spent the mornings in French class, then met up with Katie and the kids in the afternoons. Katie and I had last been to Paris ten years ago for our wedding anniversary following a mission trip trip to Latvia; ten years later, we celebrated our 12-year wedding anniversary in Paris again. We may make a habit of going to Paris every ten years--it's going on our calendars for 2028.

Supper at our flat in Montrouge, July 2018

The kids enjoyed Paris quite a bit, although it was very hot for much of our stay. Most days were between 80-90 degrees Fahrenheit, and some neared 100. We visited many parks and museums, although we didn't do as many of the touristy stuff (like go up the Eiffel Tower), partly due to expense, partly due to heat, and partly due to the CROWDS. We were in Paris for both the Fete Nationale (14 July) and for the World Cup final game between France and Croatia. It was incredible to be in the city when France won the World Cup--you could hear/feel the entire place erupt with each goal.

Floating boats at Jardin du Luxembourg, July 2018

For what lies ahead in the months to come, all three kids are in the same school this year, as Alister heads to preschool (it's called "nursery" here) alongside his brother and sister. So, for the first time in nine years since Copeland was born, we have a few hours in the mornings each week without the kids. This has made for some well-needed coffee dates and relaxing adult-paced walks through town and along the beach. It's great to see our kids thriving at their school; it's been a bit emotional at times, as all transitions are, but each of them has been enjoying the new school year thus far (although they do come home a bit exhausted).

First day of school, August 2018

East Sands, August 2018

For my academic life, I'm entering into my second year of PhD research. I'll be a tutor (sorta like a T.A.) for two undergrad courses, and I'm a new associate editor for Transpositions, the online journal of ITIA. If you'd like to write a scholarly-yet-accessible essay or book review on the intersection of theology and the arts, feel free to contact me with your pitches and ideas. In November, corresponding with AAR/SBL in Denver, I'm presenting a paper titled "The Borders of Wakanda: Black Panther as Cinematic Parable" at the annual meeting of the Society for the Arts in Religious and Theological Studies (SARTS). If you're at AAR in Denver in November, be sure to say hello! Also, I have two upcoming publications coming in early 2019 with peer-reviewed academic journals: Theology and the Journal of Youth and Theology. And I just received word this week that I've had a book chapter accepted for an upcoming volume, "The Good Place and Philosophy" in Open Court Publishing's "Popular Culture and Philosophy" book series. All this to say, my schedule is quite full (and I still have a thesis to write!). But it's so good--I truly love what I'm doing, and I'm grateful for every moment.

Finally, Katie and I are volunteering to serve with the burgeoning youth ministry at our church, St Andrew's Scottish Episcopal Church. We hosted our first youth group night in our home, which was an evening of playing Ticket to Ride and eating brownies with a pair of teens. There's a good team of volunteers working together, all affiliated with St Mary's College (the Divinity school) in some way. It's early in our service, but we're excited to be back in a discipleship role, and doing this together as a couple. Even as I've transitioned away from a full-time paid youth ministry role into academia, I never want to forget or step away from my first love and vocation: the spiritual care and formation of young people.

Again, to all those who have supported us--financially, emotionally, spiritually--thank you for being part of our adventure in Scotland and making this possible. We're so thankful for our life here, and will continue to post updates in the months and years to come.

Six Months Later: Mayward Family Update

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Fri, 30 Mar 2018 12:40:00 +0000

Joel and Katie, St Andrews Cathedral, November 2017

It's been half a year since we arrived in St Andrews, and almost exactly a year since we announced we were moving to Scotland. Here's what the past 6+ months have been like for our family.

Christmas 2017

Family Life in Scotland: Our two oldest have settled wonderfully into the local primary school. While the first few weeks were a bit rough in adjusting--jet lag and a new country will do that for anyone--they've grown to love their school, and their teachers are particularly exceptional. It's a small school, with only one class/teacher per grade. Our kids are learning plenty of Scottish idioms and are picking up a slight accent with each passing day. Our youngest will start up preschool--what they call nursery--in August at the same school, so we'll be able to drop them all off together in the mornings. Katie continues to work for Food for the Hungry from home; she's been working for FH for over a decade, which has been wonderful. She attends a women's Bible study on Monday nights, which has been a rich source of spiritual enrichment and fellowship. Her days are spent exploring the town, attending play groups, and meeting up with friends at parks and the library.

Some things we love about Scotland: the natural beauty and ancient history of the land; the slower pace of life; tea and biscuits (especially shortbread!); the amazing accents; getting groceries delivered to our home via Tesco; lots of walking around town, especially Lade Braes, a path which weaves throughout St Andrews; double-decker busses; the ocean view. More than anything else, we've loved the community we've found via St Mary's, the Divinity school. Before we ever arrived, we felt like we already had friends and companions who were supporting us and willing to help in any way they could. Since settling here, we've found that communal, kingdom-of-heaven mindset just continues, ranging all through the faculty to the postgraduates and their families. People just want to help each other, and our kids have loved making new friends at both church and school. We've settled on a church home at St Andrew's Episcopal Church, St Andrews, where we've adjusting to the liturgical worship as we build friendships with the other families we worship alongside.

Braving the "Beast from the East" snowstorm, March 2018

Some things which are harder adjustments: things get moldy more easily here (I've had to clean off blackish mold from the walls of our mud room multiple times over the past few months); the winter was quite dark and dreary, especially the month of January; the Internet and cell phone services are slower than we're used to (and Netflix has a much more limited selection); our immune systems have been fighting various germs and illnesses since arriving, so it feels like, on any given day, at least one family member is sick or sniffly, and a bout with "hand, foot and mouth disease" left all of us wiped out for about a month; and the coffee is nothing like the Pacific Northwest. The UK has also been hit with a number of highly unusual storms this winter, leaving us stuck indoors watching the wind and snow howl outside. Even the Scots are complaining about the cold snowy weather, which is saying something.

My desk in the Roundel

PhD and Academic Life: So what does one do as a PhD candidate? Most days, I spend a lot of time at my desk in the Roundel, a designated study space for Divinity school postgraduates which looks like a big round castle turret. I read, write, read some more, write some more, delete what I wrote, drink coffee, and continue to read. With my chosen subject, I'm diving into the deep end of film theory, theology, and philosophy, which has been intellectually stretching in the best way. I find that my mind is like a muscle, and I'm working it out in ways I haven't done before, perhaps akin to preparing to embark on a marathon or a triathlon--you've gotta train every day!

I've spent the past 6 months working on the probationary review for the Divinity school, which includes a 10-12k word chapter of substantial research, a bibliography, and an outline of the full thesis (it's a "dissertation" in the US, but a "thesis" in the UK). I came into the PhD with a fairly clear focus: I wanted to explore the films of the Dardenne brothers through the overlapping lenses of theology and ethics, viewing their films as cinematic parables which shape the theological and moral imagination of the audience. While some of the theologians I was planning on using for my methodology have changed (namely, I'm mainly relying on Paul Ricoeur and phenomenology/hermeneutics instead of Hans Urs von Balthasar's theological aesthetics), my focus remains on the Dardennes and their films as parables. My supervisor, Dr. Gavin Hopps, is exemplary, with an encyclopedic knowledge of theology, philosophy and the arts, as well as a witty sense of humor and a keen editorial eye.

I've also had papers accepted into two academic conferences: a paper on the theology and metaphysics of the TV sitcom The Good Place for the Society for the Study of Theology conference at the University of Nottingham in April (title: "A Divine Comedy? Mortality, Morality, and Metaphysics in 'The Good Place'"), and a paper on my thesis research for the 2018 International Conference on Religion and Film at the University of Toronto in May (title: "Re-forming Film as Parable: Toward a Ricoeurian Parabolic Hermeneutic"). I've submitted one other paper to a peer-reviewed academic journal, have plans to write another on the various TheoArtistry projects hosted by the Institute for Theology, Imagination and the Arts (ITIA), and aim to be at AAR/SBL 2018 in Denver in November with (hopefully) two more papers to present.

Even as I've been busy with all the reading and writing--which I'm loving immensely!--the pace of life in St Andrews also allows for plenty of moments of rest, walking through the small Scottish town along its ancient pathways, strolling by the castle or cathedral ruins and looking out at the North Sea. It's a peaceful, life-giving pace of life, even as I continue to be mentally and spiritually stretched in my theology and philosophy. I do hope to have more opportunities to teach in the future; PhD students are invited to teach tutorials, akin to being a T.A. in the US, only with a bit more autonomy and responsibility, and I plan on being a tutor during the next academic year.

Walking around on the Old Course

Future Travels and Plans: Our current lease in our two-bedroom attached house ends in May, and we'd been praying and searching for a new home, one which might serve us for the remainder of our time in St Andrews. Finding affordable housing for a family of five is difficult in St Andrews, and we wanted to stick within walking distance to the kids' school if at all possible. God has provided in a remarkable and unexpected way: after Katie chatted with a neighbor about our housing, the neighbor contacted us about the house adjacent to us, whose owner was debating renting the home in the near future. Long story short, we've spoken with the owner, and have made plans to move into the house in late May. It's a three-bedroom detached house with a much larger backyard garden, and it means we'll be able to stay in the same neighborhood and school. The details haven't all been finalized yet--we're meeting the landlord this weekend--but we're grateful for God's provision and unexpected grace. I've also received a scholarship award to attend a month-long French language immersion course in Paris for my studies, which means our family will be staying in Paris for the month of July.

For all those who have supported us--financially, emotionally, spiritually--thank you for being part of our adventure in Scotland and making this possible. We're so grateful for our life here, and will continue to keep y'all updated in the months and years to come.

Life in Our New Home: Mayward Family Update

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Thu, 05 Oct 2017 07:11:00 +0000

A foggy St Andrews Cathedral selfie, with a puddle-stomping toddler in the background

The kids near West Sands

Our new home.

In the quad of St Mary's College, the Divinity school

St Andrews Castle

Copeland and Eloise on their first day of primary school in Scotland.

On September 5, after a few red eye flights and a brief wonderful hiatus with our friends, the Bartons, in Connecticut and New York, we arrived at our new home in St Andrews. In so many ways, the adjustment has been much smoother and simpler than we anticipated. Within the first week of arriving in St Andrews, we set up a bank account, acquired new cell phone plans and Internet (albeit we had to wait three weeks for the Internet to be activated, for reasons still unknown), obtained our biometric cards (which are essentially our visas and IDs while living here), and settled into our cozy two-bedroom bungalow.

Now we've been here a month. There have been moments of stress and exhaustion, and the kids have taken some time to adjust to a few particular aspects (especially attending a new school). But we're genuinely enjoying life here in our new home. Here's what we're loving about St Andrews so far:

Walking. We walk everywhere! With so many pathways and streets, and in such a small town, we find that walking works best so far, rain or shine. Our home is less than a 5 minute stroll from the kids' primary school and two local grocery stores. We're near a path called Lade Braes, which meanders throughout the town alongside a creek named Kinness Burn and goes by a number of parks, a pond, and a large knoll called Hallow Hill. The center of town a 10-15 minute walk; my office space across from the St Andrews Cathedral is 20 minutes. While it's taken some adjustment for all of us, we are thriving here. Katie and I have always loved going on walks and hiking around. In the locations we've lived where that was more difficult, it felt like something important was missing in our lives. St Andrews' walkability suits us wonderfully.

Food. While we've yet to attempt haggis, we've really enjoyed the meals we've eaten. With our family's dietary restrictions due to food allergies, food can be tough, but we have discovered so many more things we can eat, especially me. Among other things, I'm allergic to soy, which is in the majority of packaged food items in North America (go check your cupboard--you'll find soy in nearly everything), but it's rare to find it here. After an evening cup of tea, we eat a lot of baked goods, particularly shortbread. We've also found that food prices are comparable to the US, if not less expensive. Did I mention baked goods? Because, shortbread.

Culture and pace of life. In the month since we left, the US has experience devastating wildfires in the Columbia Gorge, hurricane and tropical storm disasters in Texas and Puerto Rico, the worst mass shooting in American history in Las Vegas, threats of nuclear war from North Korea, and all the vitriol and immorality stemming from the current US president. Things are slower and quieter in St Andrews. It grieves us to hear of such tragedy from a distance, and there are times when we wish there was more we could do to help from afar beyond our prayers. Still, St Andrews feels like a sanctuary, a small enclave of decency and beauty in the world, and we're thankful to experience it for a season. We have encountered so many friendly and genuinely good people here, not only from Scotland, but from all over the world in this small-town university setting.

Community. Before we ever arrived in St Andrews, we had already experienced the kindly embrace of the Divinity school community. Through email and social media, our questions were answered and worries were calmed in the weeks and months leading up to our move. Upon arrival our new friends, the Morleys, came by with a ready-made dinner for us. Since then, we've met so many wonderful people and received a myriad of invitations for meals, drinks, and conversations. In our first church visit, we were greeted by a host of professors and postgraduate families. Over and over, people asked us, "What do you need? How can we help?" When a professor's husband asked me what we needed, we semi-jokingly said, "A coffee maker." (Coffee in Scotland is nowhere near what coffee is like in the Pacific Northwest.) Though we had just met, he said he had one we could borrow, and dropped it on our doorstep that afternoon. It's just a small example of the hospitality and generosity we've encountered; at times, it feels very much like an Acts 2 community, a taste of heaven on Earth. The postgraduate community at St Mary's College--the Divinity school--is wonderfully inviting and life-giving.

We've heard from a number of the PhD families entering their fourth year of research that they're reluctant to leave St Andrews when the studies have come to a close, as they've loved their time here so much. I can already see what they mean.

Pop Culture Consumption, Summer 2017

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Mon, 28 Aug 2017 08:00:00 +0000

It's been four months since I graduated from Portland Seminary, and we are in the final week leading up to our move to Scotland. We leave for New York on September 2, then fly into Edinburgh on September 5. I'll begin my PhD programme at St Andrews on September 27, so we will have a few weeks to get settled as a family before I dive back into full-time academic studies.

I've tried to take advantage of this in-between time to read and watch as much as possible, particularly books and films outside of my research. So, here's a list of everything I've consumed since graduating from seminary (April 28) until now (August 28), posted in chronological order without comment or review:

Movies (Read my movie reviews at Cinemayward or follow me on Letterboxd)

The Lost City of Z (2017)
A Monster Calls (2016)
Mulholland Dr. (2001)
The Handmaiden (2016)
Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 (2017)
Florence Foster Jenkins (2016)
Alien: Covenant (2017)
The Silence of the Lambs (1991)
Don’t Think Twice (2016)
Alien (1979)
La La Land (2016)
Aliens (1986)
Alien 3 (1992)
Escape from New York (1981)
A Quiet Passion (2017)
Stalker (1979)
Wonder Woman (2017)
Paterson (2016)
I Am Not Your Negro (2016/7)
Brooklyn (2015)
Things to Come (2016)
The Spitfire Grill (1996)
War Machine (2017)
The Book of Henry (2017)
Heat (1995)
Wonder Woman (2017)
Moana (2016)
Star Trek Beyond (2016)
Casting JonBonet (2017)
Wonder Woman (2017)
Baby Driver (2017)
Okja (2017)
The Beguiled (2017)
Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Their Finest (2017)
Night of the Living Dead (1968)
War for the Planet of the Apes (2017)
Trafic (1971)
Dunkirk (2017)
Rio Bravo (1959)
The Big Sleep (1946)
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets (2017)
Bringing Up Baby (1938)
Sunrise: A Song of Two Humans (1927)
A Ghost Story (2017)
A New Leaf (1971)
The Happiest Day in the Life of Olli Maki (2017)
Ball of Fire (1941)
Sergeant York (1941)
The Battle of Algiers (1966)
Southside with You (2016)
To Have and Have Not (1944)
Grand Illusion (1937)
The Birds (1963)
What We Do in the Shadows (2014)
David Lynch: The Art Life (2017)
The Glass Castle (2017)
Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me (1992)
After the Storm (2017)
A Man for All Seasons (1966)
The Believer (2001)
The Son of Joseph (2017)
Logan Lucky (2017)
The Trip (2010)

Television

Twin Peaks, Season 1-2
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Season 3
Master of None, Season 1 (didn't finish)
The Wire, Season 1
Rectify, Season 1
The Good Place, Season 1

Books

American Gods (Neil Gaiman)
Out of the Silent Planet (C.S. Lewis)
Perelandra (C.S. Lewis)
The Peaceable Kingdom (Stanley Hauerwas)
In the Name of Jesus (Henri Nouwen)
That Hideous Strength (C.S. Lewis)
The Quakers: A Very Short Introduction (Pink Dandelion)
Like Dew Your Youth (Eugene Peterson)
Theology and Culture (Paul Tillich)
Movies are Prayers (Josh Larsen)
A Gentleman in Moscow (Amor Towles)
Trauma and Memory (Peter Levine)
The Crucifixion (Fleming Rutledge)
A Book of Luminous Things (Czeslaw Milosz)
The Givenness of Things (Marilynne Robinson)
Jayber Crow (Wendell Berry)

Podcasts

This American Life
Filmspotting
Seeing and Believing with Wade Bearden & Kevin McLenithan
Invisibilia
On Being with Krista Tippett

Music

Kendrick Lamar - DAMN.
Sufjan Stevens, Nico Muhly, Bryce Dessner, and James McAlister - Planetarium
Arcade Fire - Everything Now
The War on Drugs - A Deeper Understanding

What have you been reading, watching, or listening to this summer of 2017?

Preparing for Scotland: A Mayward Family Update

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Wed, 12 Jul 2017 17:53:00 +0000

Our luggage so far.

Seven checked bags and five carry-on bags.

That's our personal goal: we're aiming to fit everything we hope to bring to Scotland with us in our luggage. I'll likely have to ship a box or bag of books for my PhD studies--I have a growing stack of art-and-theology books surrounding my desk--but for everything else, we're striving for minimalism. In those 7 checked bags, with a weight limit of 50 pounds, we'll pack all our clothing and shoes, our DVDs and toys, and anything else we feel we'll absolutely need for our time in Europe.

It's a challenge to determine which of our possessions to bring with us, what we need to store away for our (potential) return in 3+ years, and what we need to sell or discard. Looking at an item--an article of clothing, a book, a piece of furniture, some artwork--we have to ask ourselves, "Will I need or want this in 3 years?" This process has brought to light both just how materialistic we can become in our consumerist culture, yet how certain items still hold immense, appropriate value for us. In digging through closets and creating giveaway piles, we have rediscovered beloved objects, artifacts from our journey together: old journals from our college years; a coffee mug given as a gift when Katie and I first began dating; small trinkets saved from international travels and the birth of our children; a special toy or stuffed animal for our kids.

In my 20s, I used to rage against the consumeristic materialism of our culture and decry any ownership of things. Now, a little older and little wiser, while I still lament over our society's idolization of wealth and excess, I am recognizing the grace of things. I see the good gift of God's created world and the good things we make with it, and I am thankful. I am also humbled by those who have given of their own wealth to support us, and we are deeply appreciative for the generosity extended to us.
Here's a brief update about our financial situation from our GoFundMe campaign:

We've done it: our goal for this fundraising campaign was $40,000 in savings, enough for our UK visa and travel purposes. Right now, as I type this, we have $42,278.75 in our savings account. So while we didn't achieve this GoFundMe goal of $10k, it's been incredible to see how friends and family have given just the right amounts at the right time. Thank you, Thank You, THANK YOU to all who have given.

Some things I've learned from an online fundraising campaign:

1) The money will come in unexpected ways. Whether from a new writing project, a speaking gig, or the incredible generosity of friends and acquaintances, I have been repeatedly moved to tears when a significant contribution has been given when I least expected it. So many friends from seminary gave to us, even though I know they have their own tuition costs and financial strains--thank you for your generosity and support, friends! We feel deeply loved.

2) I don't do self-promotion very well. Perhaps this is why my books haven't exactly been best sellers. I'm hesitant using social media to promote my "brand" or "build a platform." So, in spite of me, people still gave generously.

3) God is faithful in all things. Whether we had achieved our goal (and we did!) or if nothing had happened, I remain convinced that God is present and active in our story, in good and life-giving ways. This isn't a theology of glory or health/wealth; it's simply a recognition that every good gift comes from a good God.

Since posting that update, we've also found a new (temporary) home in St Andrews, a two-bedroom bungalow in a wonderful location between the children's primary school and the Divinity school. There's a yard and a fireplace and a small sunroom. It's rather small compared to many American homes, which is wonderful--we're genuinely excited for more minimalistic living. The lease only goes from September until May, so we hope it will be a great initial home for us in Scotland.

A glimpse of our new home in St Andrews.

We also have our plane tickets. On Saturday, September 2, we'll fly to New York. On Monday, September 4, our family of five will board an evening flight and wake up 7 hours later in Scotland. We'll spend a day with wonderful friends we met in Arizona, Josh and Liz Barton, who now live just outside NYC in Connecticut. We're so excited to see our friends in New York during our layover. We anticipated flights costing anywhere from $1000-$1600 per person, as well as planned for a few lengthy layovers. However, we found some incredible prices for tickets through Norwegian Air and United Airlines. Perhaps I'm overspiritualizing it, but finding airline deals which allow our entire family to fly to Scotland for *less than $1400 total* feels like Divine providence and grace. Katie and I are making a list of ways God provides for us in this adventure to Scotland; we've added "cheap airline tickets" and "home in St Andrews" to the list.

We are experiencing a number of endings in this in-between season: my graduation from Portland Seminary back in April; finishing up my time as the interim high school director at Lake Grove Presbyterian at the end of June; saying goodbyes to friends and family in these weeks before we leave. It can be difficult and stressful to live in this liminal space, saddened by what we are leaving behind while eagerly anticipating what lies ahead. Yet we are also learning to be present and remain hopeful, preparing well while also holding our plans with open hands. Now, we await information for applying for our visas--please be praying that this visa process happens quickly and smoothly! Thanks for following our story and being a part of our journey. We'll keep the updates coming in the weeks and months to come.

Re-membering Well

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Mon, 29 May 2017 15:39:00 +0000

I will remember the deeds of the Lord;

yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago.
I will consider all your works
and meditate on all your mighty deeds

Psalm 77:11-12

On this Memorial Day Weekend, I am remembering, and still shaken by, the recent violent events which rocked my city only days ago: a man, full of hatred and violence, murdered two courageous men and injured a third when the three defended two teenage girls being harassed by racist, hurtful slurs. A group of strangers, united only by their encounter on the MAX train line, found themselves in a life-and-death moment which tragically ended in loss of life. I am deeply grieved that something so horrific--a racist hate crime and a domestic act of terrorism--could occur so close to home. I am also deeply humbled by the real-life Good Samaritan story of two individuals who took action to help and serve their neighbors--teenagers, no less, making this a true youth ministry tale--and in doing so, lost their lives.

I also remember a friend from high school, 1st Lt. Brian Bradshaw, a soldier in the US Army who was killed on June 25, 2009 in the war in Afghanistan. A bomb exploded near his vehicle. He was 24 years old. I remember his sarcasm and humor, as well as his depth of insight and principled actions. He served his family and friends and neighbors and strangers, and lost his life serving his country. I remember all of my friends and family who have served in the military or been affected by its ubiquitous presence in American culture.

I remember the bombs dropped by American drones and planes on civilian lives in the Middle East, the Coptic Christians in Egypt who were killed this past week by ISIS, the Manchester bombing. There are so many acts of violence or injustice in recent weeks as to become a blurred ink smear on the pages of history. One can easily become cynical or despairing. Yet I also remember the good news of the kingdom of heaven, and how death has been conquered by resurrection life.

Laying down one's life for another may be the ultimate act of sacrificial love. Yet there are family members and friends left behind, grieving in the land of the living. Even within a sacrificial act, like the two men who defended the teens or Brian Bradshaw's service, there is pain and less. It is sobering to think of one's life and story in light of those who have been lost, and to integrate the memories into individual and communal narratives. We must remember well; we must re-member.

To re-member is to put flesh and blood on memories, to enact practices and habits in light of the past as a faithful step into the future. Memories can dissolve with time; re-membering raises them back into concrete existence. It is an invitation to re-member, re-gather, re-create, and re-call. It is an invitation of faith, hope, and love.

Responding to this invitation, I am also remembering God's faithfulness and providence in my life, the moments of unexpected blessing and sheer delight that comes from being a recipient of divine generosity. Katie recently had the idea to begin a journal collecting the stories of God's provision in our lives. It is a chronicle of answered prayers, both those intentionally articulated and those unspoken and even unknown by us at the time. Through Jesus, there were medical bills paid, housing provided, friendships discovered, opportunities presented, doors both closed and opened, and courage given. It's a spiritual discipline of sorts, taking the time to search our memories, both recent and distant, and writing down what we find there when we search for Christ's presence. We are re-membering, giving flesh to and creating a narrative body from the scattered stories of Jesus moving in our midst.

We leave for Scotland on September 2, traveling first to New York, then getting on a plane to Edinburgh on September 4 and arriving the following morning. Between these three-day weekends bookending the summer months--Memorial Day to Labor Day--we will continue to re-member God's faithful presence and action in our lives, even as we attempt to practice faithfulness ourselves. We are still waiting and searching for a accommodations in St Andrews, still waiting for information on visas and loans, still raising support as we give away or sell our belongings in anticipation of moving across the world. It can be a nerve-wracking endeavor, but we are re-membering God's goodness, and thus can step into the unknown with a genuine sense of hope and peace. I think of the picture of our family above, taken on the coast of Maui, facing into the wind and moving towards the edge of the jagged cliff, new horizons before us as we step forward together. I remember....

Would you re-member with us, and remember us, in your prayers and in your advocacy? You can support us financially through our campaign, and continue to follow our journey here at JoelMayward.com.

Our Journey to Scotland: A Mayward Family Update

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Mon, 06 Mar 2017 13:45:00 +0000

The Roundel, a study area for Divinity postgrad students at St Andrews

In September of 2012, the Mayward family sold our home and moved to Canada. With a new pastoral role, as well as a desire to get my master's degree at Regent College in BC, our family felt led by the Holy Spirit to uproot from our home and ministry in Arizona to embark on a new adventure, excited about the possibilities we saw in our new context and community.

While we made lifelong friendships and loved the beauty of BC, our season in Canada proved to be more difficult than I anticipated. Two years into our stay, I found myself in burnout and depression, prompting our family to move back to to Portland only days before Christmas 2014 in order to heal and discern what God was up to. A few months later, our son Alister was born; a few weeks after that, he was diagnosed with congenital heart disease, ultimately leading to open heart surgery when he was six months old. In the midst of my darkest emotional and spiritual season, we also navigated the experience of caring for a child with a life-threatening disease. During those weeks and months, I resonated with the biblical stories of Job, Jeremiah, and Habakkuk: God, what are you doing? Why is this happening? Where are you in all this?

During this season, I went back to seminary. For a long time, probably since my early college years, I've wanted a doctorate. I'd delayed in getting my master's degree for years, dabbling in a class here and there, until finally enrolling full-time at George Fox Evangelical Seminary, now Portland Seminary.

A lot of people were perplexed. You're in burnout...and you want to go to seminary? Wouldn't that make everything worse? Yet I have *loved* my time at Portland Seminary. It has been richly therapeutic and life-giving. I love reading. I love writing. I love pondering and processing and deconstructing and reconstructing. I love communicating ideas with others, whether verbally or written, in the hopes of sparking interest and inspiration, shaping and sharpening their paradigms and practices. Becoming a theologian in the world of academia sounds right up my alley.

Still, I also love being a pastor. I continue to feel a commitment to the local church. Thankfully, I've been able to serve in an interim youth ministry position at a very gracious church who has encouraged my academic pursuits. The art of shepherding others, being a spiritual guide and sounding board--it's a sacred privilege and a joy. Moreover, it's a calling, however one wants to parse that term. Yet through this vocational discernment process and all the winding paths, I have more clarity than ever: I need to pursue becoming a professor, a pastor-theologian.

I view my vocation as one of building bridges. I often find myself standing between communities, with one foot firmly planted in each. I want to build bridges between the worlds of the local church and the academy; between theological conservatives and progressives; between various cultures, faiths, and tribes in order foster conversations about meaning and morality with grace and respect. In our current climate of political unrest and polarized non-dialogue, I am convinced that beauty, truth, and goodness are more important than ever.

So, let me share some good news: I have been accepted into PhD studies at the Institute for Theology, Imagination, and the Arts(ITIA) within the Divinity School at the University of St Andrews. Katie and I visited the UK last spring to explore potential PhD options--as well as celebrate our 10-year wedding anniversary--and we fell in love with St Andrews, both the town and the university. This academic journey means our family of five will move from the Portland, OR area to the coast of Scotland for three years of adventures and education in Europe. I’ll graduate from Portland Seminary with my MA in Theological Studies on April 28, and my PhD program (“programme” in Scotland) begins on September 27. Our whole family is thrilled by this opportunity, as it will be an incredible cultural experience for all of us, especially our kids.

Joel and Katie, St Andrews, Scotland

Why Scotland and the University of St Andrews? I will be focusing my studies on the intersection of theology, ethics, and film; specifically, I'll be studying the films of the Dardenne brothers, theological aesthetics in the vein of Paul Tillich and Hans urs Von Balthasar, and various philosophers and ethicists (Emmanuel Levinas in particular). ITIA is a unique interdisciplinary program at one of the best, most highly regarded Divinity schools in the entire world. It’s the best possible program for this kind of study, and I’m grateful to get accepted. (Fun trivia: St Andrews is where the opening scene of Chariots of Fire was filmed, is considered the birthplace of golf, and is where Prince William and Kate Middleton met while attending university. Also, N.T. Wright happens to teach there.)

The way visas work for the UK, we have to have proof of adequate finances within our bank account for each person in our family. To cover the travel and visa costs for our family of five, we will need to have at least $40,000 saved in our bank account by June in order to move to Scotland. Over the past two years, we have saved up nearly $30,000 for this adventure, so we need at least $10,000 more to reach our goal. Between accommodations, visa and travel expenses, school tuition, and various fees, we recognize that we need financial help and support from others. We humbly ask for you to support us.

In the past few months, we have been asked by many people how they may be of help in this adventure. So we have come up with a number of ways that you can support us:

Give financially. Please make a donation to this GoFundMe fund, or you can send us a check or cash (Mail checks to 12435 NE 20th Street, Vancouver, WA 98684). We estimate that we need $10,000, so we cherish every donation. If 50 people gave $100, and 250 gave $20, we'd reach our goal!
Give us stuff to sell (or buy our stuff). We are planning on having at least two garage sales to sell all sorts of things, including our furniture, TV, kids’ clothes and toys, and books. If you have something you’d like to donate for us to sell, we’d love to pick it up from you if you live in the Portland area. We are also looking to sell our Subaru Forester just before we go, so if you’re interested in a fantastic used car, let us know.
Give to our travel needs. We will need enough large pieces of luggage for our family of five, so if you have any luggage you rarely use, we’d love to take it to Scotland! If you have airline miles you could donate, we are also looking to offset our ticket costs—five plane tickets to Edinburgh can get pricey.
Hire me. I’m available to write for your publications or speak for your conference, camp, class, retreat, etc. during the months of May-August. I can also do webinars on any of my three books. Contact me: jmayward (at) gmail.com.
Share this campaign and blog post. We don’t want to add to the social media noise, but we do want to share our good news and gain the support of anyone and everyone who wants to help. Share with your friends, family, co-workers, church small group, or anyone who cares deeply about education and the arts. Use #maywardadventures if you're a hashtagging sort of person.
Pray. Sometimes this can feel like the Christian spiritual add-on to these financial requests, but we’re quite serious—we truly need people to be praying for us, not only for the beginning of this adventure, but for its entire three-year duration.

One of our family’s values is to live a great story. This means developing our character, choosing difficult paths intentionally, and take the harder-but-better road. We see this move to Scotland as a new chapter in a greater story God is telling in and through us, and we invite you to be a part of that story with us!

Grace and peace,

Joel, Katie, Copeland, Eloise, and Alister

Give to our GoFundMe here

#maywardadventures

Top Music and Books of 2016

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Sat, 31 Dec 2016 05:05:00 +0000

I didn't purchase many new albums or books in 2016. Much of the soundtrack and literature I consumed were from years past, discovering albums I'd overlooked or books from long ago which piqued my curiosity. Still, these 2016 albums and books served as my friends this past year. Inspiring, affecting, challenging, and enlightening, these are the dozen cultural companions who accompanied me on my journey. Perhaps they'll serve as faithful companions for you too.

In alphabetical order:

Top 6 Albums of 2016

Audrey Assad - Inheritance

Bon Iver - 22, A Million

David Bowie - Blackstar

Explosions in the Sky - The Wilderness

Radiohead - A Moon Shaped Pool

Soundtrack from the film Sing Street

Top 6 Books of 2016

Assimilate or Go Home: Notes from a Failed Missionary on Rediscovering Faith (D.L. Mayfield). A spiritual memoir filled with pathos and wisdom, snark and substance.

Better Living Through Criticism: How to Think about Art, Pleasure, Beauty, and Truth (A.O. Scott). Scott's philosophical rambling approach might be off-putting to some, but I found it winsome and affirming in his advocacy for the art of criticism, and the criticism of art.

Dreams, Doubt, and Dread: The Spiritual in Film (ed. Zachary Settle, Taylor Worley). Featuring some excellent writers on faith and film (David Dark, Michael Leary, Joe Kickasola) discussing phenomenology and various films and filmmakers (Jeff Nichols, Andrei Tarkovsky, Wes Anderson, David Lynch), this academic book is an excellent compilation.

The Dusty Ones: Why Wandering Deepens Your Faith (A.J. Swoboda). One should expect to be challenged and frustrated by this treatise on the practice of spiritual wandering. That's just how wandering goes, and A.J. has a gift for weaving the perfect tangent and anecdote into his writings.

How to Survive the Apocalypse: Zombies, Cylons, Faith, and Politics at the End of the World (Alissa Wilkinson, Robert Joustra) Essentially an introduction to the philosophy of Charles Taylor by way of pop culture, Wilkinson and Joustra have crafted something quite unique in its compelling critique of modern/postmodern culture, as well as celebration of truth and beauty wherever it can be found. The chapter on the film Her is worth the price of the book.

Profane Parables: Film and the American Dream (Matthew Rindge). At the intersection of political commentary, film criticism, and Biblical hermeneutics, this short-but-sweet book looks at three films--Fight Club, American Beauty, and About Schmidt--as filmic parables subverting the ethos of American civil religion and nationalism.

What were your favorite books and music albums from 2016? Share in the comments.

On Reformation-Era Ministry with Youth

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Thu, 29 Sep 2016 17:58:00 +0000

For my master's thesis, I've been reading on families and the spiritual formation of youth in the Reformation era. The main question I'm asking in my research revolves around the historical theology and significance of children and youth ministry. What are our historical roots? What can we learn from those who came before us? What have been historical practices within the church regarding the spiritual formation of youth? In particular, how did the theological views of Luther, Calvin, and the Anabaptists inform practices regarding spiritual formation, such as catechisms, confirmation, and baptism? There is a lack of critical and scholarly engagement with the historical origins of ministry with children and adolescents, particularly any theological studies devoted to teenagers prior to the 20th century.

In my research so far, I've noted that the churches struggled with waning faith as young people approached adulthood. From Gerald Strauss' book Luther's House of Learning:

"This slackening of religious commitment was a common phenomenon. The question for reformers was not only: How well is instruction given in youth? But also, does it last throughout life? The evidence on this point was discouraging."

While children were inclined to take up the faith of their family, faith began to lapse with the approach of adulthood. This was a common enough occurrence for pastors and church leaders to write treatises about how to keep this from happening, offering plenty of tools and advice for parents and pastors to keep young people engaged with their faith. New books and manuals were being printed in order to keep the youth and young adults from abandoning their Protestant faith.

Sound familiar?

The Reformers also emphasized the family context as primary for children's spiritual formation. Yet they found that families rarely lived up to this ideal, leading to the plethora of catechisms and religious education programs that emerged during the era in order to equip the parents to take up their vocation as the "bishops" of their family. Pastors expected the parents--especially the fathers--to ask their children about the sermons, to teach them to memorize Bible verses, and to lead a sort of family devotion at dinnertime.

Other children and youth ministry issues they were facing in Reformation-era Europe:

The onset of puberty between ages 11-14 led to issues with sexual promiscuity, while average marriage ages were in the early 20s for women and mid 20s for men. In the sixteenth century, people were getting married later and later.
Youth were often bored with church services and sermons, and religious education had to use creative tactics to keep children engaged, such as stage plays (skits), stories, comedies, rhymes, case studies ("example stories"), and other forms. One pedagogue put it this way: "By means of these entertainments we may win them over to the lessons we want to teach them."
Parents were inclined not to be aloof or uncaring towards their children (as is sometimes assumed of the era) but to be overindulgent, spoiling their children through coddling them.
The ultimate goal for many churches and families was good behavior in children and youth--sexual purity, avoiding drunkenness, obedient to authorities, church attendance, and doing one's duty for society.

So, does any of this sound familiar? After 500 years of the Protestant church, we are still addressing the same issues in youth ministry in very similar ways. Of course, there certainly were differences. Yet I'm finding more similarity than disparity in my research thus far. Perhaps there's something we can learn from our ministry ancestors. As I continue in my research, I'll post more updates. For now, which of these findings surprises you or resonates with you?

Writing Roundup for Summer 2016

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Mon, 15 Aug 2016 18:38:00 +0000

Illustration by Brianna Ashby for BW/DR

It's been awhile since I've posted anything on my personal blog, but that doesn't mean I haven't been writing. Here are the links and descriptions for the various essays, reviews, and musings I've written elsewhere:

Bright Wall / Dark Room. I wrote an essay on the filmic adaptation of my favorite novel, Cormac McCarthy's The Road called "Carrying the Fire." It's one of the most personal essays I've ever published, and I'm grateful for how it turned out. Subscribe to BW/DR for $3 a month, as they're publishing some of the most interesting and creative film criticism I've ever encountered.

Christianity Today. Continuing the yearlong series "The Year in Liturgical Cinema," I wrote a piece on Ordinary Time and slow-and-boring films, like those from Ozu, Bresson, and other filmmakers who highlight the mundane and everydayness of life. This series of essays exploring the themes of the liturgical calendar has been akin to a spiritual discipline for me, forcing me to look at films and spiritual practices in new ways.

Journal of Religion & Film. In my first foray into the world of academic publishing, I wrote a book review on Matthew Rindge's excellent new book Profane Parables: Film and the American Dream for the Journal of Religion & Film. The book focuses on three films--Fight Club, American Beauty, and About Schmidt--as subversive stories dismantling and critiquing the American dream. My review should be published in Spring 2017.

Youthworker Journal. My feature article "The Unexpected Gift of Burnout" is now available online. I also continue to write book reviews for YWJ; you can see all my latest for YWJ here.

I've also written lots of film reviews at Cinemayward, including The Innocents, Jason Bourne, Finding Dory, The Lobster, and Swiss Army Man. You can keep up with my writing by following me on Twitter or Cinemayward on Facebook.

If you'd like me to write for your publication, contact me via email.

Writing Roundup for Early 2016

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Mon, 25 Apr 2016 18:23:00 +0000

Like I use a ball-point pen to write....

I've been doing quite a bit of writing this first quarter of 2016, so here is the roundup of links to where you can find my work:

The Year in Liturgical Cinema. This is an ongoing series at Christianity Today movies, where I explore the themes of the Christian liturgical calendar and draw connections and parallels with a variety of films.

Here's my essay on Epiphany, exploring Ex Machina and Her and incarnation.
Here's Ash Wednesday and Lent, and the themes of facing death in The Revenant, The Grey, and Ikiru.
Here's Easter (which was only published at Cinemayward.com) and on-screen Christologies of Jesus films in 2016

Reel Spirituality. I wrote an essay for the Brehm Center at Fuller Seminary on The Hunger Games films and the systemic abandonment of youth in our culture.

Reel World Theology. Here's my review of Casablanca, one of my all-time favorite films and a beautiful picture of redemption.

YouthWorker Journal. For the movie-loving youth ministry folks, I wrote a post on "5 Ways to Effectively Use Movies as Illustrations."

Seeing and Believing Podcast. Okay, so I didn't *write* anything for this--I just talked about movies with Kevin McLenithan as a guest host for Christ and Pop Culture's podcast about film and TV. We discussed 10 Cloverfield Lane and our top 5 single-location movies.

I've also created downloadable movie discussion guides called CINE, which you can find at the Cinemayward.com online store. The latest one is called Superheroes, and the upcoming CINE guide will be Classic Youth Ministry Comedies (I'm looking at you, Princess Bride and Napoleon Dynamite)

You can also find my movie reviews at Cinemayward.com, like The Jungle Book, Midnight Special, Zootopia, and Knight of Cups.

Thanks for reading! Follow me on Twitter to keep the conversation going. If you'd like me to write for your publication, contact me here.

Winding Paths: A Mayward Life Update

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Sat, 27 Feb 2016 18:45:00 +0000

The Tianmen Mountain road in China is a beautiful, dangerous wonder. The serpentine roads traverse misty green cliffs and pointed peaks. There are 99 switchbacks leading up the mountain, many of which wrap around each other like a coiled snake. I found this image to be a striking portrayal of my spiritual journey in following Jesus. The path of spiritual transformation doesn't look like a straight-lined trajectory; it's a series of twists and turns, ups and downs, awe-inspiring while also risky. We revisit the places we once were, only we pass by with a more mature perspective as we're further along the journey.

Since my last life update, God has continued to guide us along new, winding paths which take unexpected turns. Here's what's been happening over the past few months:

Alister: Our youngest son went through open heart surgery this past August. It's the most difficult experience my wife and I have encountered as parents. We hope we're on the far side of this suffering; our son is healed, and has the scars to show for it. He's approaching his first birthday in the next two weeks, and we're deeply grateful for the past year and the joy he brings our family. We're also thankful for a God who comforts and sustains in the midst of suffering and unknowns, who is with us and for us, even when the outcome is unclear. God loves our kids more than we do. We're finding hope in that reality.

Cinemayward: I'm writing frequently for Cinemayward.com, my new website for all my film reviews and musings. I've been importing my old reviews from this blog to Cinemayward, and it's been fun to see how my writing and perspective has matured over the years. My first film review is this one for God Grew Tired of Us from August 2007; I've come a long way since that one. Check out all my reviews here. I've also launched a new downloadable resource with The Youth Cartel called CINE. Each CINE centers on a theme and features 4 films and discussion guides, which include games, discussion questions, and a devotional guide for small groups. So far, we have CINE: Christmas Movies and CINE: Superhero.

Writing: I've both limited and expanded my writing, saying "no" to some projects while diving deeper into others. I've written two essays for Christianity Today Movies (here and here) in a series we're calling The Year in Liturgical Cinema, following the Christian calendar and connecting films to the theological themes that emerge. I also wrote a chapter on the film Something, Anything for an e-book, Christ and Pop Culture Goes to the Movies: 2015. It's a phenomenal collection of 15 essays from the fine folks at Christ and Pop Culture. I'm working on essays for Reel Spirituality at Fuller, and continue to write book reviews and articles for Youthworker Journal.

Ministry: As of this month, my temporary interim role as the high school director at Lake Grove Presbyterian Church has taken a bit more of a permanent status--I'm working there 3/4 time while finishing up my masters degree at George Fox Evangelical Seminary. Lake Grove has been a wonderful community of mission- and discipleship-centered followers of Christ. As I'm still learning much about the Presbyterian world and culture, I'm enjoying this season of being back in a youth ministry role.

Church Planting: To make a long story short, our journey into church planting is on hold for the foreseeable future. Through the assessment process and our prayerful discernment, I ended up having to make a choice between two desirable paths--one towards church planting, the other towards getting my PhD. This doesn't mean our desire for church planting has dissipated, but it has taken the back seat for the next thing...

PhD: Through the past year of being in seminary and going through a significant vocational discernment process, climaxing in our church planting assessment, it's become more and more clear that I'm gifted and passionate about teaching and equipping people. I love writing, researching, teaching, communicating, guiding, nurturing, and enlightening others, particularly the emerging generation (i.e. youth and young adults). I find that I'm thriving in an academic environment. I'm also finding that many, if not most, of the youth ministry and pastoral folks I encounter *aren't* wired this way--they're not as thrilled about the academic/education process as I am. I want to be a good steward of the gifts I've been given, as well as find my "fit" as a member within the body of Christ. So, I'm taking steps to pursue PhD studies in theology and religion, and I'm especially interested in subjects like the intersection of film, ethics, theology, and spiritual formation. One of these steps involves visiting the University of Kent in Canterbury, UK. Katie and I will be traveling to the UK in May, both to explore the potential of doctoral studies and as an early celebration of our 10-year wedding anniversary. My ultimate goal is to teach at the university and/or graduate level, though that's certainly a few years off.

You can be praying for us--if we do go the route of PhD studies, it'll mean another big move (there aren't any theology PhD programs in the Pacific Northwest), at least 3 years in a new (possibly international) location, and we'll need some financial help (hopefully in the way of scholarships or job opportunities). It'll also be a significant move for our kids--moving three kiddos, especially one with past heart disease, is daunting. But we're also willing to take the step of faith and go on this adventure together.

And it's quite the adventure God is leading us on. We're still unsure where it ultimately leads. Lots of winding paths and unknowns, but certain to encounter beautiful vistas and moments of awe and clarity. One certainty that gives us comfort is Christ's presence and grace throughout the adventure. We're stepping forward in faith. We want to live a great story. I hope we're doing it.

Top 10 Favorite Films of 2015

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Wed, 30 Dec 2015 18:30:00 +0000

At Cinemayward.com, my new film review website, I posted my top 10 favorite films of 2015, as well as an ode to my wife, Katie, and her strength for our family in 2015:

Let’s face it: end-of-year list-making is a complex task. You have to go back and think of all the stories and images that have worked their way into your mind and heart, evaluating what has lingered. Some films made a strong first impression, but waned quickly. Others were initially met with hesitation or frustration, but proved to be more powerful than I imagined due to their ability to endure in my thoughts and bring up new ideas. These top 10 favorite films are the ones that made a lasting impression, that moved or challenged me, that communicated deep or weighty ideas and offered spiritual insights. (You can read my Top 5 Documentaries and #25-21 here, and my Top #20-11 here.)

If there was a common theme threading its way through my favorite films list, it might be the presence of strong, beautiful, heroic female characters. I wonder what’s drawn me to such a motif, or if the year of 2015 has simply been a banner year for females in films. Think about both the major blockbusters and the critically-acclaimed art films: The Force Awakens, Carol, Mad Max: Fury Road, Room, Brooklyn, Inside Out, The Assassin, Sicario, Ex Machina, Joy. They all feature strong female leads giving memorable performances as fully-realized characters. Plenty of films in 2015 passed the Bechdel Test with flying colors. Two-thousand and fifteen was The Year of the Female Lead Role.

Personally, the past year has been one of the most difficult, painful, and transformative years in my entire life. It’s also been a character-developing year for my beloved wife. She has been the strong and beautiful female presence in our story, the heroine who kept me and our children afloat in a season of distress and suffering. In the past year, our third child was born with a significant heart defect, one which led to open heart surgery a few months later. The months of doctor appointments were filled with waiting and wondering. Those hours in the hospital as we handed off our boy to the doctors so they could repair holes were the most painful moments we have yet experienced as a couple. When your child’s life is in question, when their safety and well-being are out of your hands, well…it’s difficult, to say the least. Add my personal struggle with healing from burnout and depression, as well as a few identity crises moments and vocational revelations, and I’ve been a mess. But Katie, my wife–she’s the one who carried us. I think of the moment in Mad Max: Fury Road where Max is taking aim with a rifle at a distant enemy and misses. Furiosa approaches and asks for the gun, which Max reluctantly but knowingly hands over to her. She uses his shoulder as a base to steady her aim, then makes the shot he couldn’t make. That’s been my marriage this year–we’ve struggled through this as a team, but she’s been the foundation while I play the supporting role. She’s made the shots I couldn’t make on my own.

So, consider this list an ode to my wife. She’s not invested much in films, but she’s certainly invested in me, in our children, and in our life together. We have a value as a family: live a great story. It’s a value that continues to prompt us to take the more difficult, risky, exciting path in life. I can’t think of anyone else I’d want to live out this story with. My wife has been the hero of our story in 2015. If there was a real-life award for Best Female in a Lead Role, my vote goes to her.

These are the films that moved me, captivated me, terrified me, challenged me, and inspired me. These are my top 10 favorite films from 2015

Read the list here.

Top 12 Favorite Albums of 2015

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Fri, 18 Dec 2015 21:11:00 +0000

In 2015, I purchased fewer albums than in previous years, but still listened to a significant amount of music thanks to various streaming services and this new revolution called The Internet. There is more music available than ever before, which makes it more difficult to sift through the abundance of mediocrity, yet also means certain musical treasures, when discovered, are deeply cherished. The list is indicative of my eclectic taste, featuring hip-hop, pop remakes, indie grunge, electronic/dance, alt-rock, and plenty in between. These aren't necessarily recommendations for every listener; these are simply the songs and artist who captivated my ears, mind, and heart over the past season of new life.

The follow dozen albums served as my soundtrack for 2015:

12. Ryan Adams - 1989

11. Kendrick Lamar - To Pimp a Butterfly

10. Laura Marling - Short Movie

9. Passion Pit - Kindred

8. Wilco - Star Wars

7. Josh Garrels - Home

6. Jamie xx - In Colour

5. Bear Carver - In the Dogwoods

4. Sleater-Kinney - No Cities to Love

3. Chvrches - Every Open Eye

2. Torres - Sprinter

1. Sufjan Stevens - Carrie & Lowell

What was your soundtrack for 2015? Share your recommended albums in the comments.

Cinemayward.com is Here

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Mon, 30 Nov 2015 07:13:00 +0000

In case you haven't checked it out already, my new website devoted to my film writings is here: Cinemayward.com.

The tagline: "Reviews, essays, resources, and musings on film and spirituality."

I started writing about films in 2007 at my personal blog mostly as a personal outlet for processing the variety of films I was viewing. Since then, I’ve written hundreds of reviews, culminating in my book about film and theology called Jesus Goes to the Movies: The Youth Ministry Film Guide (The Youth Cartel, 2015). I’ve written about film and spirituality for Christ and Pop Culture, Reel World Theology, Reel Thinking, 1More Film Blog, and Youth Worker Journal. And now, I have an online home for everything movie-related.

I hope that Cinemayward.com can be a unique film review website, one written from a pastoral and Christian perspective, yet is for any reader interested in the deeper truths and spiritual ideas found in movies. I hope to point to new filmic treasures you may not have heard of yet, as well as dig into the ideas found in popular blockbusters. I hope to write quality film criticism, not just my own opinions or a list of reasons why you should/shouldn't see a film. Finally, I hope to challenge and inspire movie-goers--especially Christians--to think critically, wisely, and joyfully about the art they consume.

I'll be importing my previous film reviews from JoelMayward.com to Cinemayward, and all my new film-related content will be at the new site. I'll still write here about my life, youth ministry, theology, culture, leadership, and anything else that comes to mind. Check out the Reviews page to see new reviews on Spectre, The Martian, Spotlight, and more. I'll be posting Essays and links to articles at other film websites, as well as recommendations for movies you can be streaming.

You can also check out the Cinemayward store, which has a new downloadable resource from The Youth Cartel called CINE. Like the popular VIVA series from The Youth Cartel, CINE is a downloadable curriculum for using with your youth group or small group, featuring four film discussion guides around a central theme. This first CINE is "Christmas Movies" and it's free. Repeat: FREE. Merry Christmas. Go download it. For free.

Thanks to my friend Adam McLane and his Internet skills for helping create the Cinemayward website! If you want an awesome website, check out what Adam does.

Here's what you can do:

1. Check out Cinemayward.com and add it to your preferred RSS feed reader.

2. Like the Cinemayward Facebook page.

3. Follow Cinemayward on Twitter: @cinemayward

4. Watch movies, then discuss them with me in any of those places (website, FB, Twitter). I'd love to hear what you think.

Thanks for reading, sharing, liking, and commenting on my film reviews over the past eight years. Let's keep the film and spirituality conversation going.

On Racism, Youth Ministry, and Cultural Intelligence

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Tue, 27 Oct 2015 15:30:00 +0000

I was recently at a high school weekend retreat, spending the weekend at a beautiful camp in eastern Oregon with a variety of other churches from around the Pacific northwest. At a climactic moment in the evening session, a youth pastor introduced a group of teens performing a drama illustrating the gospel. The group of teens piled onto the stage, all dressed in black apart from the singular figure of a young man in a white shirt. The group performed the Lifehouse "Everything" skit, a pantomime drama set to music where the figure of Jesus (the young man in white) protects and saves a young woman who has been attacked by an increasingly-violent onslaught of diabolical figures.

The young man portraying Jesus was Caucasian, as was the teen girl in the central role. What drew my attention and alarm were the supporting characters, the black figures on the side. They were not only dressed in dark clothes; at least three of the eight teens were minorities, black and Asian. When I watched the YouTube video of the "Everything" skit, I noticed the same thing: the man portraying Jesus was white, the young woman was white, and most of the devilish figures were minorities.

I wondered how the black, Asian, and Latino teens were feeling watching the drama unfold before them. If I was new to Christianity and watching this skit, I might think that the gospel message involved a white Jesus saving me from the sinful clutches of people with brown skin. Y'know, Jesus will rescue you from the hell of ever having to date a black man or hang out with an Asian girl. Is this the best way to communicate the gospel to young people?

--

When I was a youth pastor in the suburbs of British Columbia, I spent a significant amount of time on the campus of one of the largest high schools in the Vancouver area. I would walk the halls during lunch time, saying hi to the teens in my youth group and making new relational connections through the community youth workers who were devoted to serving the campus. The school was a vast maze of hallways, with scores of young people lining the passages in social clusters, eating their lunch and filling the air with laughter and chatter.

The greater Vancouver area is a multi-cultural mosaic. Many of the cities have a larger primarily Asian or Indian population than white/Caucasian, and the Hispanic population is rapidly increasing. As I walked around the high school hallways, I noticed the plethora of cultures and languages represented. Yet our large suburban youth group remained primarily white. (We did have one Asian adult volunteer and a high schooler from Honduras, both who were often mistaken as Mexican.) I wondered what a multicultural church would truly look like, and if our church demographic was in alignment with our surrounding neighborhood and culture. How does the church embrace and embody its surrounding racial diversity?

--

A friend from Uganda told me a story about how a group of Americans on a short-term mission trip handed out color gospel bracelets to the children in his village. The bracelets are an evangelism tool commonly used in evangelical circles in order to cross cultural boundaries in order to share the gospel.

The black bead stands for sin, the red bead represents Christ's blood, the white bead is forgiveness and salvation, the blue bead is baptism, the green is growth in Christ, and the yellow is the golden roads of Heaven. My Ugandan friend told me that the Africans accepted the bracelets from the Americans with propriety, though they weren't really that interested in having a cheap bracelet with such few colors.

After the Americans left, the Ugandans talked about how the Americans said black represented sin and death, and how white represented salvation. Black is sinful and wrong; white is Christlike and holy. They wondered aloud about the Christian gospel message. Where was any good news in this?
--

This past summer, I took a month-long job teaching English literature to incoming Latino freshman at a high school in Gresham, OR. (Read more about that experience here.) The program was aimed primarily at helping Latino students grow academically and mature in their understanding of Latino culture and heritage. One of my students had moved from Mexico only a few weeks prior to the course and was adjusting to life in a new country. Another student, a charismatic Cuban young man, was still learning to speak English; he read the Y.A. novel I assigned in a Spanish translation.

The students were very willing to share their stories, opinions, and experiences with me, especially around the subject of race in America. They had all sorts of perspectives on Donald Trump's campaign, El Chapo's prison escape, immigration policies, fighting Russian gangs, growing up as a Latino in Portland, and soccer players they liked (they loved soccer). They'd often shift into speaking Spanish around me, unaware of my ability to understand much of what they were saying. They talked about their school experiences with teachers who treated them differently than other races, and seemed more comfortable in this environment where they could be fully themselves. They were the majority; I was the minority. A few students shared about their relatives who were undocumented immigrants. I wondered how many of the teens before me worried about deportation, racial profiling, or systemic racism. What would good news look like for Latino teens in east Portland?

--

I once read a helpful book called Many Colors: Cultural Intelligence for a Changing Church, by Soong-Chan Rah, a professor in the Chicago area. Rah describes the need for cultural intelligence as vital for the church's gospel presence in our ever-diversifying culture, where white folks will be the minority in America by 2050. Cultural intelligence is the capacity to understand, empathize, and work with people across a variety of cultures. It is fostering a cultural awareness, noticing the differences between people and cultures, and recognizing one's own biases and racial missteps.

I imagine the youth pastor who introduced the Lifehouse skit wouldn't consider himself a racist, but the drama on the stage showed a lack of cultural intelligence when it placed minorities in those positions. What would it look like if a black or Asian or Latino or Middle Eastern teenager was in the role of Jesus next time? How might that better communicate the gospel to others?

I imagine the Americans sharing beaded bracelets in Uganda weren't intending to offend or send a message of racial superiority or remind Ugandans of Western colonialism. But, they did. Good intentions don't always equal loving actions. How can we teach young people to be on mission with cultural awareness and a sense of humility?

I imagine the few Asian, black, and Hispanic teenagers that dot the populations of mostly-white suburban youth groups across North America are very self-aware of their race, and quietly do their best to fit in with the rest of the group. I also imagine many of the mostly-white youth workers and teens in these contexts are unaware of any racial issues. This is the nature of racial privilege--it means we don't even have to be aware of or worry about racial tension or cultural intelligence, because we're the majority ethnicity in the room. What would it look like if youth workers were on the front lines of the racial divides and actively pursuing creating the multi-cultural kingdom environments we see in places like Isaiah 60 and Revelation 22?

I'm asking myself: How can I be aware and sensitive of my own whiteness as I disciple a diverse population of young people in the name of Jesus?

In youth ministry and the American evangelical church, we need to be aware of unintentional cultural messages we may be sending which are antithetical to the gospel we hope to communicate, lest we dilute the good news of Jesus with bad news of racial and cultural ignorance.

Photo Credit: Frerieke (Creative Commons)

New: A Mayward Life Update

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Tue, 29 Sep 2015 14:33:00 +0000

So much has happened in my life and with our family over the past few months, it's hard to even keep up with it all. The emotional ups and downs of recent days have been significant, and I am trying to keep up with Jesus as we follow him into new territory. I am discovering that the horizon looks different than it did a year ago. Things have changed.

All things are new.

Fresh. Different. Recent. Revived.

With so much newness, I want to give you a glimpse into what God has been up to in our lives, some snapshots of the new.

A New School: I've been a full-time student at George Fox Evangelical Seminary since this past January, and it's been deeply enriching, challenging, and life-giving to be in such a diverse Christian learning community. I anticipate graduating with my Master of Arts in Theological Studies in 2017, then go on to pursue a PhD in the realm of theology and religious studies. (More on that PhD stuff later).

A New Book: My third book, Jesus Goes to the Movies: The Youth Ministry Film Guide, released this past August. Releasing a book feels akin to giving birth, in a less-messy sort of way. It is giving life and independence to a creative initiative, the final result of so many months of dreaming, writing, editing, re-writing, freaking out, and finally sending it into the world. A culmination of the past decade of youth ministry and movie-watching, the book is an accessible practical theological of film and its many connections with the minds and hearts of young people. If you like movies or are involved in youth ministry, this book is for you.

A New Ministry Role: Starting this next week, I will be the interim High School Director at Lake Grove Presbyterian Church in Lake Oswego. After a 4-week speaking series with their high school group in May, I now find myself in the place of shepherding and guiding the high school teens through a season of transition this school year as their former high school director (a great, long-time friend) moved into a new role at a new church. I look forward to being back in a youth ministry role, pacing alongside teens in their journey with Christ and guiding them into the ways of the kingdom of God. The role is a temporary one. While I am still incredibly passionate about youth ministry, there is a new vocational direction I'm headed...

A New Vocation and Church Plant: After nearly two years of prayer, wrestling, conversation, questions, research, dreaming, and more prayer, I am taking steps towards church planting. We want to plant a church in the heart of inner Southeast Portland, embedding gospel roots in the deep reaches of the Sellwood, Moreland, and Woodstock neighborhoods. When folks ask me "why?" my answer feels almost childlike in its simplicity: "Because people in SE Portland don't know Jesus yet." While there has been a significant growth of gospel-centered churches in the greater Portland area over the past decade, these particular SE neighborhoods remain largely untouched by localized church communities. I think Jesus wants us to join him in those neighborhoods in being and sharing good news. Portland has changed so much since we left it 8 years ago to move to Arizona. Keeping with my theme, it's a whole new city. But my love for this city--and this region of the city in SE--has only grown over those 8 years, and I am eager to see how God will work in and through a new church community embodying his gospel in SE Portland. (I'll share more on church planting in future posts. Keep our family and the church plant in your prayers, as we have only just begun the journey.)

A New Heart: Our son, Alister, was diagnosed with a serious heart condition only a few weeks after he was born. It's news no parent wants to receive, and when we heard his heart was failing, I was grieved. We endured for a few months as he grew bigger and stronger, watching his heart closely to see what might happen. About a month ago, he had heart surgery; the doctors opened up his chest and, simply put, fixed his heart. We have noticed the difference in his energy and demeanor already. We have a reinvigorated, energetic, delightful little boy with the cutest expressions and the scar on his chest as a permanent reminder of his ordeal. We are also deeply overwhelmed and grateful for the love and prayers sent our way during this difficult season. We've been so encouraged by emails, text messages, Facebook comments, and the prayerful presence of friends and family.

A New Hope: Not Star Wars Episode IV. Even better. Our son has a new heart, yet I think my heart has also been made new. In the fall of 2014, one year ago, I was at the lowest point in a season of burnout, unsure if there was anything good on the horizon of my life. Through the past year, I've been in a process of healing and resurrection, and now better understand and love myself and the God who created me. The horizon is brimming with hope, and I eagerly anticipate the future with a renewed sense of calling and passion.

I recall sitting in the office of a seminary professor this past year, asking him if there was any hope beyond the burnout. He said this, "You need to know, Joel, there is hope; but it will require death…the death of your pride, the death of your plans. It will require the death of your current concept of Jesus; but there is resurrection, so there is hope! The new, resurrected you will be more whole and more real. Jesus is not done with you yet."

Jesus is not done with me yet. He's not done with you either. He once said, "I am making all things new." I think he meant it.

12 Great Films About Christianity

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Thu, 10 Sep 2015 15:45:00 +0000

There is a film genre commonly known as the "Christian movie," or faith-based film. It's a genre both beloved by its followers and ridiculed by its critics, known for its heavy-handed messages, saccharine sentimentality, mediocre production value, and troubling theology. I explored the theology behind Christian films in this essay.

Thankfully, there are films that do live up to the moniker of "Christian movie" in that they exhibit the truth and beauty of Christ. These films wonderfully communicate the nature of what it means to be a Christian, the theology of Christian spirituality, and the ups and downs of true discipleship, all in a well-crafted cinematic experience. If someone was investigating or exploring Christianity, and they wanted to watch a movie about the Christian faith, these are some of the films I'd watch with them. Or, if a disciple of Jesus wanted to watch an artistic portrayal of the faith as a source of encouragement and inspiration in their pursuit of Christ, these films would certainly fit the bill. (For an exploration of great films exploring spirituality, check out the Arts and Faith Top 100 Spiritually Significant Films list.)

Here are twelve great films about Christianity. These would not fall under the specific genre of "Christian movies," but certainly embody and explore Christian spirituality, theology, history, and practice. Some are made by Christian filmmakers; others are not. Some are overt in their approach to Christian values; others are more subtle or mysterious in nature. Yet every film reveals the nature of Christianity in its own unique way, as well as being remarkable and well-crafted. Listed in alphabetical order:

A Man for All Seasons (1966, Zinnemann). What is a man to do when one's vocation and personal convictions collide? It's a timely question in light of recent political upheavals and outcry about the nature of marriage, abortion, immigration, health care, and other social justice issues in our nation and world. Frank Zinnemann's excellent adaptation of the play by Robert Bolt examines this question through the story of Sir Thomas More (Paul Scofield), a devout Catholic and man of integrity who refused to support the divorce of King Henry VIII, ultimately costing him his career and his life. The Best Picture-winning film features a smart, thrilling script and a phenomenal performance from Scofield as a man wrestling with his conscience and duty.

Babette's Feast (1987, Axel). Two devout religious sisters living in an isolated village in 19th century Denmark take in a French refugee, Babette, as their new housekeeper. When Babette unexpectedly wins the French lottery, she does something for the village they never expected--she throws them a huge banquet with lavish ingredients and exemplary dishes. The sisters and villagers, who live strictly religious lives in an attempt to overcome their own hypocrisy and temptations, ultimately succumb to the radical grace embodied by Babette. Babette's Feast invites viewers to see the remarkable grace of God that goes beyond any religious moralism or duty.

Chariots of Fire (1981, Hudson). A film about friendship, courage, and faith, Chariots of Fire focuses on two British athletes in the 1924 Olympics, one a Jew and the other a devout Christian. Recognized for its synth soundtrack by Vangelis, Chariots explores the meaning of vocation and personal conviction as runner Eric Liddell struggles to reconcile being an athlete with his Christian beliefs, summarized in this quote: "I believe God made me for a purpose, but he also made me fast. And when I run, I feel His pleasure."

The Decalogue (1989, Kieslowski). A ten-part series of films originally made for Polish television, Kieslowski's magnum opus is loosely inspired by the Ten Commandments set in a modern-day perspective. Each one-hour episode explores the spiritual and moral dilemma of characters living in or around a particular neighborhood in Warsaw, Poland. Stark and melancholy, The Decalogue invites viewers to wrestle with their own ethical worldview in light of the characters' actions and choices. Roger Ebert listed The Decalogue as one of his all-time favorite films, and it's certainly worth exploring.

Of Gods and Men (2011, Beauvois). Quiet, solemn, and contemplative, my viewing of this film offered one of the more profound spiritual experiences I've had in recent history. Based on a true story about the kidnapping and execution of eight Trappist monks in Algeria, the film focuses less on the abduction and far more on the spiritual lives of these men. In the midst of Islamic unrest and the rising violence of terrorist groups, these French monks chose to stay in their monastery in a tiny Algerian village. They could have fled the country. They could have had military protection. But they didn't. They stayed. This film wants to explore why, and finds its answer in the Gospel. (My review)

The Gospel According to St. Matthew (1964, Pasolini). Jesus was an unexpected, unconventional Savior, and Pasolini's entire endeavor defies common Christian expectations. An atheist, a Marxist, and openly gay, Pasolini also directed the revolting erotic horror film Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom, a film banned in numerous countries. He seems like the least likely person to create an artistic and honoring portrayal of the life of Christ. Yet his reverence for the person of Jesus shines through in every scene. Shot in black-and-white and spoken in Italian, it forces the modern viewer to drop any preconceived Western notions of Jesus and rethink one's own conception of the Christ. (My review)

Into Great Silence (2005, Groning). A three-hour documentary about Carthusian monks silently praying requires serious discipline and intentionality to endure. But that's exactly the point. These monks are so enraptured with God, so in tune with His presence, so eager to hear from Him and recognize His voice, that they live in complete silence for much of their lives. The intimate, delicate film is nearly silent itself, using only natural lighting and no soundtrack in order to document the rhythm of life for these monks. The beautiful surprise: these monks are not boring or dull or dreary, but are joyful and light-hearted men, transformed by their experiences with Christ. This is a true and beautiful Christian movie about prayer.

The Miracle Maker (2000, Hayes, Sokolov). A British claymation movie about the life of Christ, The Miracle Maker is delightful, entertaining, and inspirational in its approach. Jesus (voice by Ralph Fiennes) is both approachable and powerful, embodying the nature of the human and divine in a manner rarely found in on-screen Christs. A composite of the four Gospel accounts, Miracle Maker is probably my personal favorite when it comes to Jesus films due to its accessibility and depth, making it a fantastic filmic introduction to the life of Christ for all ages.

Ordet (1955, Dreyer). Dreyer's films are parables of faith, and Ordet is exceptional in its exploration of Christian theology and the pragmatics of faith. Ordet tells the tale of Morten Borgen, a wealthy farmer with three son at varying levels of faith. One is an agnostic, rejecting the strict religious upbringing of his family. The second has gone bonkers from too much theological study--particularly in reading Kierkegaard, which feels like a theology joke from Dreyer--and now wanders around claiming to be Jesus. The youngest has remained faithful, but has disappointed his father by falling in love with a young woman whose family's Christian faith doesn't adhere to Borgen's rigid beliefs. Each man's faith is tested and transformed, leading to an affecting climactic ending. Beautifully shot and with a compelling script, Ordet explores the depths of the Christian faith with pathos, nuance, and grace.

The Passion of Joan of Arc (1928, Dreyer). This phenomenal, haunting silent film focuses on the martyrdom of Joan of Arc at the hands of the French religious elite. Often celebrated as one of the best acting performances of all time, Maria Falconetti as Joan the mystical saint is depicted in stark close-ups, her eyes and facial expressions conveying the myriad of emotions she experiences over the course of her trial. The parallels between Joan and Christ are striking, and Joan embodies what it means to be a martyr: a witness for Christ. Following Christ means taking up one's cross, and The Passion of Joan of Arc reveals this aspect of discipleship in all its agony and glory.

Selma (2014, DuVernay). The excellent biopic about Martin Luther King Jr, Selma portrays Christianity in the best possible light, offering a real-life example of people who are compelled by obedience to Christ to stand for justice and work diligently to love our neighbor, regardless of location or race. When King (David Oyelowo) calls for people who care about racial equality to come join him in Selma for the march, clergy of all types flock to the staging grounds, ready to walk alongside King and Christ for the movement of justice. Near the final act of the film, a worried security officer is worried that he cannot protect King if he chooses to walk into the Alabama capital. "Aren't you worried about your own safety?" he inquires. King's response is remarkable: turning aside and shot from over his shoulder as he looks through a dusty window, he replies, "I am not different than anyone else. But I must be obedient to God." His life is a compelling picture of vocational fidelity and commitment to doing justice, loving mercy, and walking humbly with God. (My review)

The Tree of Life (2011, Malick). An expansive, ambitious film that is both transcendent and intimate, much like the incarnate God embodied in Christ. Opening with a quote from the book of Job, the thesis of the film is clear: this is an exploration of the ways of nature and grace, the harsh realities of our world and the beautiful moments of love. The Tree of Life focuses on the memories and experiences of a family in Texas--the three boys, their mother and father--through episodic images, dreamlike and ethereal. Their story is set in contrast with the creation of the universe and the end of the present age, resulting in a resurrection and the new heavens and earth. Haunting voiceovers--prayers?--provide spiritual narration over the images, and the entire film is a symphonic hymn to the good Creator. I think I can admit this by now: The Tree of Life is my all-time favorite film, an imaginative, wondrous, divine cinematic experience.

What films would you add to the list? Share you favorite films about Christianity in the comments.

The "Faith" of Faith-Based Films: On Moralistic Therapeutic Deism in Christian Movies

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Mon, 07 Sep 2015 14:50:00 +0000

Image from War Room (Affirm Films/Provident Films)

In light of the recent box office success of War Room, the Kendrick brothers' (Fireproof, Facing the Giants) latest faith-based film, I have a question I've been pondering. The vast majority of film critics, both Christian and non-Christian alike, have been quite negative about War Room; it currently sits at 36% on Rotten Tomatoes, and this critique in Christianity Today is one of the more positive reviews I've read...and it's not very positive at all. War Room's heavy-handed script, underlying misogyny, and unhealthy view of abusive marriages (just stay with your terrible husband and don't talk openly and honestly about your problems; simply hide in a closet and pray that he throws up while trying to cheat on you!) are all problematic, but particularly troubling is its theology. War Room portrays a Christianity of merit and moralism, i.e. if I pray hard enough, then God will bless me with good things. It's what I've called the "candy dispenser God." I put in the prayer, and he gives me the blessing, all in accordance to my quotient of faithfulness.

The thing is, when this faulty theology is confronted or when Christian film critics and pastors offer a thoughtful critique of the film, the response often seems to be, "Well, you're wrong. The movie made me feel great, and I feel encouraged, even convicted to pray more. And who are you to speak judgmentally and negatively about other Christians and what God is trying to do through their work? God inspired me and changed my life through this movie. How dare you question that?"

Well, I dare question it. I think it's dangerous when we stop the questioning regarding our faith and our art. (It's equally dangerous when we only question and never come to any solid conclusions or ground our feet in good theology and relationship with the Creator). More importantly, it raises a larger question, one about the relationship between personal experience and sound theology:

If someone believes an experience to be good, and it inspires them to genuinely follow God more, does that make it true?

If I come to a personal conclusion that is ultimately good--at least in my eyes--does it really matter how I got there? Why criticize the process if the end result is beneficial? Perhaps the ends justify the means.

I've admittedly done this in reading the Bible. I've read passages and discerned God speaking to me through the words on the page, despite my knowledge that proper exegesis of the passage would not bring about the personal conclusions I was contemplating. Yet this personalized reading of Scripture still prompted me to be more faithful in my apprenticeship with Jesus and pursuit of his kingdom. Surely that's a good thing. So when someone believes their prayer life is improved after watching this film, who am I to judge?

Another example: if I feel inspired to evangelize by texting all of my friends "God's Not Dead"--a tactic openly encouraged in the final moments of last year's faith-based hit of the same name--and someone actually chooses to believe Jesus through this (obscure, confusing, intrusive, ineffective) method, isn't that something worth celebrating? Who cares how it happens, as long as it happens?

What if I'm feeling good about a film precisely because it is designed to manipulate my emotions? What if the belief system a film promotes is almost, but not quite, Christianity? What if my own personal faith is less like the Christianity inspired by Jesus and more like an American subculture inspired by American values and marketing tactics?

I am concerned films like God's Not Dead and War Room are inspiring folks to pursue a Christianity that doesn't correspond to the same values of Jesus. The more of these Christian films I watch and review, the less I see the spiritual life described in the Bible. Instead of a true Christianity, I'm convinced many of these films promote a Christian flavored Moralistic Therapeutic Deism (MTD), a particularly American version of Christianity, whose tenets are summarized as such:

A god exists who created and ordered the world and watches over human life on earth.
God wants people to be good, nice, and fair to each other, as taught in the Bible and by most world religions.
The central goal of life is to be happy and to feel good about oneself. Experiencing significant pain, suffering, or sadness is likely due to a distance from God and not behaving as faithfully as one should.
God does not need to be particularly involved in one's life except when God is needed to resolve a problem. He will intervene when called upon by good people in prayer.
Good people--those who believe in God--go to heaven when they die.

According to the National Study of Youth and Religion, MTD is the most common religious/spiritual belief amongst American teenagers and young adults, and likely reflects the same beliefs of their parents. This "almost Christian" belief system is ubiquitous in the American church; as a pastor, I have seen and experienced its effects for the past decade.

These are faith-based films all right. But what faith are they promoting?

In this genre of film, most or all of the Christians turn out happy, healthy, and smiling by the film's conclusion. The non-believers often are killed, jailed, or otherwise come to a painful end. This narrative structure aligns with Moralistic Therapeutic Deism's soteriology--good people are blessed and happy, while non-believing bad people experience suffering. The audience response, "It made me feel good!" certainly rings with MTD's belief system. Of course it makes you feel good! That's what God is meant to do for us. And you know something is true and beautiful if it's always positive and uplifting.

Not only do these films make you feel good, they give you clear, practical instruction on how you are to behave in response to the film, a behavioral practice that is guaranteed to make your life happier and better. For War Room, it's "make a plan to pray more." For God's Not Dead, it's "text everyone about God now." These behavioral prompts are like the application points to a sermon, given a simplicity and an immediacy that makes for an easy discipleship. Having one's lifestyle and practices be changed by a film isn't wrong or bad--my own life has been significantly transformed by a few key moments in film--but faith-based films are more overt and didactic in their approach, and directly connect audience's response with their Christian faithfulness, i.e. good Christians will do what this film says. It's the filmic form of those Facebook memes prompting you to share a photo or Bible verse with all your friends, where the implications are clear: if you don't share, then you're not being true to Jesus.

I imagine the recent box office success of War Room will be celebrated as a victory for God's kingdom, because in the paradigm of MTD, any sort of financial gain would obviously be considered a good thing and a clear answer to prayer. God rewards and blesses those who are faithful and obedient, right? MTD is also a very individualistic endeavor; there is nothing in its central tenets about the need for community or accountability. My faith is my faith, and who are you to question how I think and feel about God? This corresponds to my original question above about personal experience; it doesn't much matter if it's the true God as found in Jesus, as long as I'm a good person and happy and don't bother anyone else. After all, being a Christian is best summarized as being nice in the name of Jesus, right?

At best, the filmmakers are ignorant of their filmic campaign for a false gospel of MTD, likely because they too have succumb to its pervasiveness in our culture. At worst, the filmmakers are keen marketers and moneymakers who have discovered an evangelical subculture all too willing to throw their money towards these well-marketed echo chambers that will keep MTD alive and well in the American church.

Moralistic Therapeutic Deism is almost Christian, just enough that many of us may not even recognize the difference in ourselves. The response of "I liked it, so stop critiquing it" may be an indicator that our faith is placed in something less than the death-and-resurrection power found in Jesus and the reign of his kingdom values in our world. Jesus doesn't invite us to be nice so that everything works out to make us happy. He bids us to come and die, to live a life of sacrificial love, compassion, justice, and mercy. Prayer is not meant to fix all my problems or get me things I want; it is intended as a means of holistic transformation in the relational context of conversation and presence with the Divine. Evangelism cannot be summed up in a text message or an invitation to a poorly-made movie; sharing the good news requires my whole life, demonstrating the radical love and grace of Jesus for my neighbor as genuinely good news. Critiques of my beliefs and opinions and character are not bad or divisive; they are necessary aspects of Christian community as we spur one another on toward love and good deeds.

In true Christianity, there is room for difference and grace. I am not saying that we cannot have differing opinions on films, or that the subculture of evangelical Christianity cannot have its own art and stories to celebrate. This is not the cynical rant of someone who believes Christians incapable of making good art, but as someone who believes we can--and should--make art that resonates with the truth and beauty found in Christ. I am concerned as a pastor and a film critic because it's not just that these films aren't that good, it's that they seem to advocate for a less-than-true form of Christianity. And audiences are buying it, both literally and spiritually. I'd rather see viewers seek out Paul Harrill's Something, Anything or Joshua Overbay's As It Is in Heaven, two recent films that are far more challenging to watch than most faith-based films, but have greater spiritual dividends. When it comes to faith-based films, let's be cautious about the underlying faith these films ultimately promote. It's almost Christian. When it comes to finding meaning, purpose, and reality, "almost" may not be enough.

Update: The film As It is in Heaven I recommend in the final paragraph is Joshua Overbay's 2014 film available on Hulu Plus or Amazon Prime; it is about a pseudo-Christian doomsday cult. It is *NOT* this 2004 Swedish film currently streaming on Netflix with the exact same name. The link I provided above will take you directly to Overbay's film on Hulu. Please approach any film-watching experience with wisdom, discernment, caution, and grace.

If you'd like a resource for growing as a wise and discerning movie watcher, check out my book, Jesus Goes to the Movies.

8 Questions to Ask Before Leaving a Ministry

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Fri, 04 Sep 2015 15:30:00 +0000

I recently left a ministry role at a church. It wasn't an easy or simple decision to make, but it's also not the first time I've stepped away from a ministry. In volunteer and paid ministry roles, I've served at five different churches, meaning I've had to leave a church on five occasions. Each time has been incredibly difficult and emotionally taxing, but each time has also led to new relationships, opportunities, and lessons God had in store. Over the last decade, I've also had numerous ministry friends go through transitions into new roles, usually in locations and positions they probably next expected. Sometimes it was a healthy move; other times it proved to be a painful decision.

If you choose to enter full-time ministry as your vocation, you'll eventually have to face this question: should I stay or should I go?

It could be due to all sorts of factors--a new job offer, a family crisis, lack of chemistry in the current ministry, serious conflicts with boss or co-workers, or it just feels like "it's time."

How do you know when to leave a ministry position and when to stick it through? Do you need to move on to something else, or should you remain faithful where you are? It can be difficult to discern what you need to do and what questions to ask.

Here are 8 questions to ask yourself before deciding whether or not to leave a ministry position:

1. How is your relationship with Christ? Are you sure you're hearing him, or just your own inclinations and desires? What have your recent prayer conversations with God been like? What passages of Scripture has he been guiding you to read and contemplate? Is there any underlying sin in your life that requires confession and repentance? Are you in tune with the Holy Spirit?

2. What are your motives? Fear? Frustration? Financial burdens? Desire for greener pastures? A new vocational direction? To be closer to family or friends? Has something drastic or painful happened recently? Being honest and clear about your motives--all of them, good, bad, and ugly--will help in the discernment process.

3. Have you been led somewhere new? Has God pointed you in a different direction, opened up a new role or church, or given you a vision for the next season? Are you headed in a clear direction, or is there just a sense that you need to stop what you're presently doing?

4. Have you been released from where you are? Has God given you a sense of peace when it comes to leaving your current ministry? Or is there a lingering sense that you need to stay there, even when it's difficult or counterintuitive?

5. How well is your fit? Are your values and the church's/other leaders/elders values and mission in alignment? If they're not, even every so slightly, you'll find yourselves headed in different directions and drifting from each other, creating long-term frustration. What needs to change in your own habits, desires, and passions in order to find alignment?

6. What is God telling your trusted community? Your spouse, your mentors, your faithful Christ-following friends who know you best--what do they think of your decision? If they bring up a number of red flags or concerns, those are worth paying attention to. Especially listen to your spouse--you should be making this decision together, and only with whole-hearted unity. I highly recommend the clearness committee, a Quaker discernment process for making big decisions.

7. What is the healthiest choice for your self, your family, and your long-term vocational goals (in that order)? Maybe the ministry position seems like a great fit with good pay and lots of opportunities, but your children hate the church. Maybe your spouse has found great friends in the community, but your soul is being drained by the ministry role you're in. Maybe you and your family love the neighborhood, but you'll never fulfill the ministry call God has given you in that position or community. My friend Brian Berry wrote this in his excellent book, As For Me and My Crazy House:

The best gift you can give your marriage is a healthy self.
The best gift you can give your family is a healthy marriage.
The best gift you can give your community and ministry is a healthy family.

Care for your own soul so that you can serve faithfully for the long haul. Even if you're single or don't have children, the above still applies--love others well out of a healthy self.

8. What was the last clear direction God gave you? When I was discerning whether or not to step away from my position in my last church, I made two lists. The first was a list of the things God was clearly guiding me to do--and when I say "clearly" I mean, I can't shake this thought and feeling, others keep affirming this direction, my readings in Scripture seem to point this way, and I feel like I would be acting in disobedience to *not* act accordingly. Clarity doesn't always mean absolute surety or absence of doubt, but it does mean that there's a strong sense of God's will in the matter. This first list is typically quite short; for me, it was only three brief sentences. The second list includes all your dreams, hopes, options, and intuitions about what God might be up to (emphasis on might). This list was much longer--about 15-20 items--but they were all just prayerful hunches and conjecture. I had to go back to the first, clearer list: what was God prompting me to do, and was I willing to obey?

More than anything, Jesus's prayer in Gethsemane applies here: "Not my will but Yours be done." Find alignment with God's desires and relinquish your own plans to His good, pleasing, and perfect will. The decision to leave a ministry is always a struggle, but it's also an opportunity to draw nearer to the heart of Christ.

Which question resonated with you the most? What questions would you add to the list?

Do Not Worry About Your Life

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Mon, 31 Aug 2015 15:00:00 +0000

Do not worry about your life.

Easier said than done, Jesus.

I think "do not worry" is the most difficult command in Scripture to follow.

I found myself half-sitting on an uncomfortably stiff mattress underneath the stark glow of the fluorescent lights of the ER. This unexpected visit was prompted by the sudden dizziness and numbness accompanying a lingering chest pain I'd been experiencing over the weekend. If you Google the signs of a heart attack--an exercise almost certain to cause personal alarm--my symptoms fit the description well enough. Except I'm 30 years old with zero history of heart anything. After hours of tests and waiting, the doctors told me what I wanted to hear: your heart is fine. A clean bill of health. Maybe some acid reflux? Take a Pepcid.

Then a nurse asked a question: Have you been stressed lately? Are you sleeping okay?

Yes. No.

I suppose in some ways I'm not as stressed as I was 9 months ago in the midst of burnout. I've experienced a significant amount of healing and joy, and a renewed sense of where God is leading our family. But this season hasn't been without its stressors. Most recently, our 5-month-old son was diagnosed with congenital heart disease soon after his birth, and this past weekend had open heart surgery to patch the holes and scrape out the extra tissue buildup in his tiny heart. He is recovering well, but the six hours during his surgery, filled with pacing and prayers and tears, were some of the most difficult and stressful of my entire life. My boy's heart was stopped and hooked up to a machine to keep him alive while skilled surgeons cut and stitched inside his chest cavity. My own chest has carried this lingering hurt--empathy pains?--and my two oldest children are under my care as my resilient and confident wife beautifully cares for our recovering son.

So, yes. I have been stressed. I have not been sleeping well. What parent of three kids, ages 6 and 3 and 5 months, is getting adequate sleep?

I am stressed. But in this stress I am learning to pray.

--

I was reading Kenneth Morefield's analysis and critique of the faith-based film industry in light of the recent release of War Room, the latest movie from the Kendricks (Facing the Giants, Fireproof). The film's thesis seems to be this: "prayer is good." Which is true. But it doesn't account for the methodology and motives behind the prayers. Much of the prayer in the film seems to be directly addressed to Satan (!) as a spiritual combative tactic, and prayer does appear to fix all the character's problems (which are minor flirtations or temptations and a somewhat strained marriage). As Morefield observes, the wife's practice of prayer for her husband "...sees him not so much as a man emboldened and encouraged through prayer but as the prize given to Elizabeth when she pulls the prayer lever." She prays in her special prayer room--a luxury most Christians, myself included, cannot afford--and gets exactly what she wants. There seems to be little suffering or waiting involved, and any sort of prolonged agonizing can be easily reduced to a montage.

I contrast this sort of prayer--self-preserving, individualistic, moralistic, easy--with the vast number of people who have been praying for our son and our family during this surgery and recovery. The prayers are genuine, communal, petitionary, and hopeful. I have been overwhelmed by the amount of people who are praying for us all over the world, and the genuine gift of social media in moments such as these. These are life-and-death prayers practiced as the community of believers comes around a family as spiritual support. This is proactive waiting, listening for God's voice in the midst of the stress, clinging to the reminder of His kingdom reality in the midst of our personal suffering. It's praying with gumption and gusto, with tears and trembling, with deep groans and sighs and wonder. There is no "war room" here because all of creation resonates with God's good presence, and I know He listens while I cry in the car or wander the hospital halls or attempt to calm my daughter during our bedtime routine or as I sip coffee in the stillness of the grey mornings.

Perhaps all prayer isn't created equally. Perhaps there are better, healthier, more life-giving and genuine ways to pray.

--

When Jesus says, "do not worry," I have to imagine his tone.

If he is commanding me with a gruff and angry "Suck it up! Be a man!" with tinges of disgust, then this is not very helpful to my situation. I don't think Jesus tells us "don't worry" in the manner of a bullying drill sergeant, trying to get us to toughen up and push down any pain or fear. This is shaming, but it often can be how we imagine God's heart towards us, always disappointed that we didn't trust Him more.

Neither is Jesus's tone a cheery, saccharine, everything-is-awesome buoyancy. This isn't the false optimism and plastic smile of that one lady--you know the one--in the church lobby on a Sunday morning. This is not high-fives and hugs Jesus, pretending that our genuine worries are better off ignored, covered up by a mask of optimism.

I hear Christ's exhortation with the tone of humble confidence. He knows we stress and worry and suffer. He experienced the same in the garden of Gethsemane and on his way to the cross. But his command of "do not worry" is likely in the same tone as "not my will, but yours be done." An act of surrender, a hopeful obedience, a determination to trust.

Do not worry. I don't think it's by mistake that these words closely follow Jesus's teachings on prayer, to pray that the kingdom would come and God's will would be done, that our daily bread would be provided as we forgive and are forgiven. I am learning that stress and worry may not completely disappear on this side of heaven, but there is genuine hope and peace to be found in the prayers of the saints.

The prayer I have been clinging to in this season of stress and hospital visits and sleepless nights is one I think every parent will find comforting. To be calmed and quieted like a child with its mother is an image that brings hope and joy in the midst of stress. To be content, to be humble, to be hopeful in the Lord--this is my prayer in moments of stress. Psalm 131, a prayer of ascents:

My heart is not proud, Lord,

my eyes are not haughty;

I do not concern myself with great matters

or things too wonderful for me.

But I have calmed and quieted myself,

I am like a weaned child with its mother;

like a weaned child I am content.

Israel, put your hope in the Lord

both now and forevermore.

Lose, Gain, Repeat: My essay on "Something, Anything" for Christ and Pop Culture

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Tue, 25 Aug 2015 15:41:00 +0000

I recently had the opportunity to write a feature article for Christ and Pop Culture, one of the best websites on the Internet. CAPC is an insightful, amusing, and diverse cache of all things culture and Christianity. You should definitely become a member for $5 a month; it's absolutely worth it, and this is a website worth supporting.

Here's an excerpt from my essay on Paul Harrill's hauntingly beautiful film Something, Anything (now streaming on Netflix) and my own spiritual journey into depression and hope:

--

In Paul Harrill’s quietly haunting film Something, Anything, the opening title is a poem from Christina Rossetti:

Who has seen the wind?
Neither I nor you:
But when the leaves hang trembling,
The wind is passing through.

Who has seen the wind?
Neither you nor I:
But when the trees bow down their heads,
The wind is passing by.

With this brief meditation on the power of invisible spiritual forces in our world, Something, Anything sets the contemplative tone for its narrative, a story of personal loss and the journey toward healing and wholeness. While she doesn’t say much in the opening scenes, we can tell that Peggy (Ashley Shelton) is, by all accounts, successful. The scenes flash before us as snapshots of her wonderful life—a marriage proposal from a handsome man in a trendy setting; a beautiful wedding surrounded by friends; the enormous and well-decorated house in the hills of Knoxville, Tennessee; the joyful news of a pregnancy. Harrill chooses to tell Peggy’s story in near-silence, and she rarely speaks throughout the film. Quiet piano music accompanies the beautiful, intimate cinematography, eliciting comparisons to Kieslowski’s Three Colors: Blue in its affecting and melancholy portrayal of a woman walking through a season of grief. Peggy experiences a terrible loss early in the film, the painful and often-unspoken incident of a miscarriage. Her tears elicit pathos and empathy, and she is clearly deeply wounded by her loss. Yet those wounds do not define nor defeat her as she navigates the unfolding season of reconstructing her very self after such a loss.

As I watched Something, Anything, I found an unlikely partner in my own loss. Here was a fictional story about a young woman who experiences a miscarriage; I was a pastor and husband without a job or direction, a man experiencing a crisis of vocation and identity in the midst of depression. Our stories couldn’t be more different, yet I found myself weeping on the couch in my mother-in-law’s living room, deeply moved and comforted by Peggy’s spiritual odyssey and her process of healing.

Read the rest of Lose, Gain, Repeat here at Christ and Pop Culture.

On Marriage

noreply@blogger.com (Joel Mayward) — Mon, 17 Aug 2015 15:42:00 +0000

I spent this past weekend in the sprawling metropolis of Los Angeles celebrating a wedding. It was a beautiful ceremony set in the hills of Malibu overlooking the Pacific Ocean, followed by an extravagant reception at a picturesque venue right on the beaches of Santa Monica. From the tuxedo rental to the bachelor party to the rehearsal dinner to the end-of-reception clean up, I was surrounded by friends and family of the bride and groom, these incredible people who had traveled from all over the world in order to be present to witness this extraordinary event.

Extraordinary? A wedding? In our culture where marriage is increasingly delayed or avoided, the divorce rates are climbing alongside the ratings of petty entertainment shows like "The Bachelor," and the hookup culture of our youth appears to be normative, the concept of marital fidelity is, at once, antiquated and highly exalted. It's a relational covenant which has existed throughout human history, something so incredibly common and necessary for human flourishing that it can almost feel unexceptional. Marriages begin every single day with the celebration of a wedding, an event so ubiquitous that there is an entire industry devoted to these gatherings--there was another wedding in the same chapel mere hours before I stood in a tuxedo off to the side and witnessed the sharing of vows, the mutual admiration and love, the pronouncement and kiss of two beloved friends. Two different couples, two wholly different stories, sharing the same date and location for the beginning of a radically new chapter in their lives.

I suppose I'm struck by how marriage, this incredibly ordinary everyday occurrence, is also a profound and continually life-transforming relationship. Marriage is both ordinary and extraordinary, both commonplace and exceptional. Even in the culture I described above, where romantic love and commitment are often muddled or misunderstood, marriage is still our ideal to strive for. I think of the whole SCOTUS decision and gay marriage debate, how both conservatives and liberals actually agree on more than they might realize. Both sides are placing marriage in a venerated position--the conservatives are trying to protect the sanctity of this beautiful covenant, and the liberals are trying to expand this beautiful covenant to everyone. Both agree: this marriage thing is worth fighting for.

And it is worth the fight. It's worth all the time and energy and effort two people must exert over a lifetime of experiences, failures, triumphs, joys, pains. I was having a conversation with a friend last year at his wedding about how many Christian marriage books seem to paint the relationship as this necessary slog, filled with conflicts and frustrations and difficulties, but all in order to make both spouses more holy before God. The way these books made it, marriage sounded more like a trip to the dentist--a painful-yet-necessary thing for one's health, and probably expensive or complicated. He told me, "Someone needs to write a book about the joys of marriage, how awesome it truly is." Because it is awesome. Yes, it does require patience and wisdom and loads of grace. But it is deeply life-giving, restorative, and loads of fun. My marriage is characterized by a deep authenticity I have never experienced with anyone else, as well as a committed friendship and mutual understanding. I get to hang out with my best friend every day! (Also, sex. That's pretty great too.) Apart from becoming a disciple of Jesus, becoming a husband and father is the best decision I've ever made, and by God's grace I continue to embrace those identities on a daily basis.

So it's fascinating to me that the chosen image of the kingdom of God is a wedding banquet. In many of his parables, Jesus uses the example of a wedding to describe the nature and character of the hope for creation, the renewal of the world by God's grace, the place he would go to prepare a place for us. In the epistle to the Ephesians, Paul draws strong parallels between Christ's relationship to the church and a husband's love for his bride. In the final chapters of Scripture, the future city of God is described as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband, approaching with dignity and wonder, inspiring awe and reverence and (I imagine) tears of joy. The thing is, the wedding is just the first step into the marriage, the celebratory beginning of an ongoing forever-and-amen relational journey. The wedding feast in the kingdom of God is just the opening number in an eternity of unconditional love and marital bliss with the Savior.

Marriage is a wonder, a gift, a mystery, a discipline, a joy. I still get teary-eyed at weddings. Can't help it. It's a beauty to behold. To quote Casablanca, "I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship." Even better, the apostle Paul, "Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."

Photo Credit: Dave Smith (Creative Commons)