The Morningstarr*

Live woolly mammoth filmed in Siberia

Jason Clarke — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 20:21:59 +0000

Renowned Australian ufologist and psychic Michael Cohen has released footage of what he claims is a live woolly mammoth crossing a river in chilly Siberia. Although thought to have been extinct for thousands of years, well preserved remains of mammoths are often discovered in Siberia. Being frozen in ice and snow is one explanation for [...]

Great absinthe give-away!

Earl Morningstarr — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 20:05:49 +0000

It’s prize-draw time again, and we have a marvellous bottle of premium Absente to give away. Absente is one of the best absinthes on the market, made in the traditional manner including a full measure of the legendary and notorious wormwood. This gift-boxed booze comes complete with its own absinthe spoon so you can enjoy [...]

Real-life reanimator and his zombie hounds

Earl Morningstarr — Sun, 05 Feb 2012 12:01:08 +0000

Dr. Robert E. Cornish was a highly gifted American biologist who received his doctorate from the University of California in 1924, aged just twenty-two. Cornish remained at the Berkeley campus of the university carrying out research and working on various outrageous projects, such as reading glasses for underwater, but in 1932 shortly after Universal Pictures [...]

Experts examine conjoined twins

Earl Morningstarr — Sat, 04 Feb 2012 18:23:14 +0000

Specialist experts in South Africa are trying to determine how a pair of conjoined twins can be safely separated. The two boys were born on Wednesday in the usual manner, but the babies were transferred to the Steve Biko Academic Hospital in Pretoria yesterday. The two infants are joined at the pelvis and genital area, [...]

Father force-feeds ten-year-old daughter poo-poo

Earl Morningstarr — Sat, 04 Feb 2012 16:02:38 +0000

An angry father publicly humiliated his young daughter by force-feeding her faeces in a busy market. Police were called to the market in Hangzhou, eastern Zhejiang Province in China when slack-jawed gawkers were too afraid to intervene, for fear of being mucked up with dung themselves. The unnamed furious father flew into a rage when [...]

Kobayashi storms to victory at Wing Bowl XX

Earl Morningstarr — Fri, 03 Feb 2012 21:22:33 +0000

Rogue gurgitator Takeru Kobayashi has silenced his critics by thrashing his opponents at this year’s Wing Bowl chicken wing eating championships in Philadelphia. The Japanese competitive eater who cut ties with Major League Eating after a row over his contract competed in the Wing Bowl for the first ever time this year, and set a [...]

Cat born with two faces

Earl Morningstarr — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 22:01:38 +0000

A lucky couple in Florida have become the proud owners of a two-faced kitten. The little pussy cat was one of a litter of kittens that Nash Hand and his wife Amanda Forsythe’s pet cat forced from its womb. The couple have decided to keep the double-visaged critter, and have named the little tyke Harvey [...]

‘Cotswold Beast’ is just a fox

Jason Clarke — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 21:30:58 +0000

There has been a lot of excitement and anticipation over the past few weeks whilst DNA tests were carried out on the mutilated remains of deer found in Woodchester Park, Gloucestershire. Two deer carcasses were sent off to the School of Life Sciences at the University of Warwick to determine the predator which had brought [...]

Teacher spoon-feeds pupils his semen

Earl Morningstarr — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 19:43:53 +0000

An elementary school teacher appeared in court today to face charges of spoon-feeding children as young a six his own reproductive mucus. 61-year-old Mark Berndt taught at Miramonte Elementary school in Los Angeles, until a film processor informed police that he had processed hundreds of suspicious photographs for Berndt and several children. After a year-long [...]

Pair arrested with toddler’s head in a bag

Earl Morningstarr — Sun, 29 Jan 2012 15:37:32 +0000

Two men have been arrested after they were found to be carrying the decapitated brainball of a four-month-old child. Muhammed Yusuf and Tanko Haruna were picked up by Niger State Police Command this week at Erena, in Shiroro Local Government Area of Niger State, during a random stop-and-search procedure. The police were said to be [...]

Baby bites head off snake

Earl Morningstarr — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 09:17:12 +0000

A 12-month-old baby who discovered a snake slithering around his home caught the scaly critter and bit its head off. Baby Imad Gadir who lives with his parents in Shfaram, northern Israel, was left alone for just moments whilst his mother went to fetch him some milk, but when she returned she found her little [...]

‘Crow’ reboot back on again

Peter Jolly — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 19:30:32 +0000

The Crow saga is still rumbling along. News of a remake of the 1990s cult classic starring Brandon Lee, in his final role, first broke back in 2009. Since then the project has had it’s fair share of directors, writers and actors as people enter and then leave. Stephen Norrington was first on the scene, [...]

Kobayashi confirmed for Wing Bowl XX

Earl Morningstarr — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 19:01:17 +0000

Renegade gurgitator Takeru Kobayashi has been confirmed as a competitor in next month’s Wing Bowl XX chicken wing eating contest. Wing Bowl takes place annually in Philadelphia on the Friday preceding Super Bowl. Competitors have to endure three rounds of gorging on chicken wings served to them by sexy cheerleaders known as ‘Wingettes’. Since 2009 [...]

‘Tonight’ the return of Saint Etienne

Peter Jolly — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 20:07:30 +0000

Indie pop darlings Saint Etienne are making a comeback with their first original studio album since 2005′s Tales from Turnpike House. The band are due to release their brand new single ‘Tonight‘ on 5th March, but for a limited period you can download it for free from their website: Saint Etienne Here’s what band member [...]

Goblins responsible for rapes and sex attacks

Jason Clarke — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 19:16:07 +0000

Residents of a Bulawayo neighbourhood in Zimbabwe are appealing for help in containing a goblin problem. Malibeni Mhlanga from Entumbane says he purchased five ‘goblins’ from an inyanga, or medicine man, who promised him the goblins would make him rich. But the little gremlins seem to have been a poor investment, because Mhlanga claims all [...]

Top ten deadly creatures

Earl Morningstarr — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 23:02:37 +0000

This here is the Morningstarr* top ten of deadly critters. If you’re out in the wilderness and plan on getting mauled, eaten, poisoned or similar then these are the beauties you want to be doing you in. #10 Tiger Top of the list is the wonderful tiger (Panthera tigris). Biggest of the big cats, the [...]

The world’s biggest bhaji

Edgar Allan McAbe — Sun, 22 Jan 2012 16:34:54 +0000

Proud catering students from Bradford college have this week been entered into the Guinness Book of World Records for cooking the world’s biggest onion bhaji. The group of students were assisted by chef Colin Burt and Bobby Patel, of the Prashad restaurant in Bradford when they cooked-up the mammoth onion bhaji as part of last [...]

Naked rowers complete Atlantic journey

Earl Morningstarr — Sun, 22 Jan 2012 14:56:19 +0000

A group of five hot ladies have finished their 2,500 mile journey rowing naked across the Atlantic Ocean. Debbie Beadle, Kate Richardson, Katie Pattinson-Hart, Helen Leigh and team leader Julia Immonen successfully completed their arduous 45-day expedition at approximately 05:00 GMT this morning in Barbados. The girls had rowed in a tiny boat all the [...]

Woman raped by rat

Jason Clarke — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 19:16:35 +0000

A woman in Zimbabwe is appealing for help after she says she was repeatedly raped by a rodent. Elizabeth Ndodayemzini from Zimbabwe’s second largest city, Bulawayo, told local press how over the past 18 months or so she has been woken in the night on several occasions by a rat raping her. Ndodayemzini explained that [...]

Vicious pimp rapes his whores using his metal-studded penis

Earl Morningstarr — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 22:56:58 +0000

German press is reporting the ongoing court case of a brutal pimp who tortured young girls into prostitution, sometimes by raping them with his metal-studded pierced penis gland. Nasty Sandor Pochev is accused of trafficking young girls into Germany from his native Hungary where he “buys” girls for as little as £2,000, then along with [...]