The Mustache Rangers Podcast

The Mustache Rangers Eat Lunch

MR Central Command — Thu, 22 Feb 2018 17:43:29 +0000

Coming Fridays in March and April 2018 to HUGE Improv Theater, it’s The Mustache Rangers Eat Lunch. The least white Mustache Rangers show ever. Enjoy this podcast length video for enjoying.

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Not By Pizza Things: Podcast Episode 270

MR Central Command — Mon, 25 Jul 2016 09:00:59 +0000

Where is the thing when you need it? You know, the thing that cuts your food? No, not a knife. But there are no knives either. Where did all the utensils go? Are they all sitting dirty in the sink? We shouldn’t have to use our hands like hand animals.

The Mustache Rangers go on a scavenger hunt in this episode. Buckle up your ear buds.

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Stand Up: Podcast Episode 269

MR Central Command — Mon, 18 Jul 2016 18:48:25 +0000

Stand-up comedy can be difficult. Unless you bring all your co-workers. Then they’ll all pretend that you did a great job when they see you at work the next day.

But what if you put secret recording devices on all your co-workers to hear what they really think of you? That would be expensive. If you’re considering a life of stand-up comedy, you do not have the money for these things. Just assume your co-workers are liars.

This Mustache Rangers podcast is about stand-up comedy. Eat it up with your brain tubes.

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Return of the King: Podcast Episode 268

MR Central Command — Mon, 25 Jan 2016 21:10:46 +0000

Suprise.

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One Last Time: Podcast Episode 267

MR Central Command — Mon, 22 Dec 2014 08:00:41 +0000

The Mustache Rangers defeat Smaug in the gripping conclusion to the trilogy based loosely on the works of J.R.R. Tolkien.

Thank you all.

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The Desolation of the Mustache Rangers: Podcast Episode 266

MR Central Command — Mon, 01 Dec 2014 08:00:46 +0000

This is the second to last episode of the Mustache Rangers podcast. It’s about doing the laundry. Sort of. Enjoy it or don’t. It’s all the same to the universe.

Enjoy.

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Mustache Rangers Final Performance

MR Central Command — Mon, 18 Aug 2014 13:52:55 +0000

The last Mustache Rangers improv show, performed at HUGE Theater, was lovingly recorded and edit by Fes of the Webcast Beacon Network. Performed in three acts, enjoy Cracked Helmet (Corey and Aric’s group before the Mustache Rangers), a special This Is Your Life starring the Mustache Rangers, and then, the final final final Mustache Rangers stage show. Share, enjoy, and know we loved you. But love fades.

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Mustache Rangers at the 2014 Twin Cities Improv Festival

MR Central Command — Thu, 31 Jul 2014 14:01:05 +0000

The second to last Mustache Rangers improv show, performed during the Twin Cities Improv Festival held at HUGE Theater, was lovingly recorded and edit by Fes of the Webcast Beacon Network.

Watch, enjoy, and share. Always share. That’s what the internet is for, dummies.

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The Mustache Rangers and PowerPoint Karaoke

MR Central Command — Wed, 30 Jul 2014 13:56:53 +0000

As fortune would have it, Fes of the Webcast Beacon Network decided to tape the final three Mustache Rangers stage shows for a video project he is starting. What that means is everyone who doesn’t live in Minnesota or wasn’t able to make it to a sold out show can enjoy the Mustache Rangers from the comfort of wherever they sit or lay or stand when they watch videos!

This is the third to last show, where Melissa Kaercher of Theater Arlo put together a special PowerPoint Karaoke deck for the Mustache Rangers to present! It’s not your typical Mustache Rangers show. There is a lot less sitting in chairs. But it was amazing fun.

You can also check out PowerPoint Karaoke in the 2014 Twin Cities Fringe Festival.
But enough words. Here is the video for your enjoyment! Share, if you like it.

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Pop Culture Wars: Podcast Episode 265

MR Central Command — Mon, 31 Mar 2014 09:00:45 +0000

A whodunit the likes of which John Grisham only dreamed. Phooneybaum and Bastidious must rack their brains to figure out the culprit in the daring unicorn figurine breakage case. Could it be the butler or the chamber maid? Or perhaps the scorned lover! You’ll have to listen to find out.

P.S. It is neither of those.

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Ready, Set, Wang: Podcast Episode 264

MR Central Command — Mon, 17 Mar 2014 08:00:28 +0000

Some episodes of the Mustache Rangers are great for the whole family. This is not one of them. This is for kids only. No, wait. The other way around. This is specifically not for children. That would have been a mess, huh? Glad we fixed that.

In this episode, Phooneybaum tries to guess what is in the Commander Major’s box. That’s about it. The Mustache Rangers probably had an amazing space adventure directly before or after this episode. No matter. You get to hear box talk. Listen with your side orifices.

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Workshopping the Workshop: Episode 263

MR Central Command — Mon, 03 Mar 2014 08:00:42 +0000

We can all agree that motivational speakers are con artists and that workshops are scams. Unless those speakers or workshop leaders are from the Mustache Rangers. Then you’d be a fool not to pay any price demanded for the charisma and knowledge they provide.

A workshop in its infancy and the wonders of Powerpoint lead the charge in this podcast episode, which takes the listener (you) behind the curtain of a Mustache Rangers brainstorming session. Put the sounds in your side head errors.

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Fancy Man: Podcast Episode 262

MR Central Command — Mon, 17 Feb 2014 08:00:29 +0000

When a podcast dies, the number of mourners at the funeral is equal to the number of iTunes reviews it has divided by 1,000. The 0.055 people at the Mustache Rangers podcast funeral made for a rather sad celebration, which is why the Mustache Rangers made the decision to give death. The Mustache Rangers are back to entertain and find another 0.150 people to show up at their funeral. Spread the word. Death is a choice!

Fashion, confidence, and twirling are the subjects of this Mustache Rangers podcast episode. Also, an odd fascination with sun dresses. If you have any suggestions for the male equivalent of a sun dress, tell the Mustache Rangers on Twitter at @mustacherangers or on Facebook at http://facebook.com/mustacherangers. Enjoy this podcast with your head pits.

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Test Out: Podcast Episode 261

MR Central Command — Mon, 10 Jun 2013 09:00:18 +0000

School is a very special time in a child’s life. It’s when they really learn how to be embarrassed. You think Uncle Rick tickling you until you wet your pants is shameful? Just wait until you express an individual sense of style!

The Mustache Rangers explore teaching and testing in this podcast episode. Why don’t you share it with your neighbor? Sure, you only accidentally make eye contact with them when you’re both getting your mail at the same time. But they might like the podcast. Take that risk!

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Massage: Podcast Episode 260

MR Central Command — Sun, 02 Jun 2013 09:00:45 +0000

Misogyny and campfires are the main focus of this, the first Mustache Rangers podcast of 2013. We’re sorry we’ve been gone so long, but we were so anxious for Arrested Development to return we couldn’t concentrate.

Did you know that misogyny still exists? And it’s mainly men who are the cause? Mainly manly men. Mainly many manly men. What were we talking about? Listen to the podcast already, and tell your friends.

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Give Up On Time Travel: Episode 259

MR Central Command — Mon, 11 Feb 2013 09:00:52 +0000

You may love time travel movies, but they don’t make any sense. Don’t worry about it. Your brain and the writer’s brain are too dumb to make heads or tails of time travel. It’s the limitation of this biological sponge in our head. You fill a sponge with protein lines and jab it with electricity and expect it to understand the flow and obstruction of time? If you do, then your sponge could use some extra electricity to the front part of the sponge part.

Enjoy this week’s podcast, dummy.

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Eat More: Podcast Episode 258

MR Central Command — Mon, 21 Jan 2013 09:00:43 +0000

Diet fads come and go as surely as the tides and bell bottoms. You can say “bootcut” but you’re not fooling anybody, the Gap. But getting back to diets, everyone is looking for the quick fix. The superfood or the magic bacteria that will eat your insides, but just enough so that you look pretty and your bowel movements smell like a kitten’s dreams.

We’re here to tell you that the kitten bacteria doesn’t exist. The only way to properly manage your weight is with a calendar of some kind. One that berates you daily. It’ll say things like “how many doughnuts is that now” or “still putting off buying running shoes, huh?” If the calendar is correct about your laziness, you’ll feel bad and maybe make a change. If the calendar is wrong, you can feel better about yourself for being smarter than a calendar. Either way, improvements are made and you’ll start to feel better.

This is for poor people only, of course. For rich people, get someone to stab the fat out of you. We think it’s called “surgery” or “insurgency.” Those words probably mean the same thing, like “flammable” and “inflammable.” So get insurgency already.

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Opinions: Podcast Episode 257

MR Central Command — Mon, 31 Dec 2012 09:00:55 +0000

Other people’s opinions are the topic of discussion in this Mustache Rangers podcast episode. Interesting fact. Did you know that everybody has an opinion? It’s true! Even babies are all, like, “what’s with all the light and the lack of amniotic fluid out here?” That was just translated with a baby translator, by the way. That’s probably why you haven’t heard about it in the news yet.

Some people say “opinions are like assholes, everyone has their finger in one.” Stay away from those sorts of people. They really know how to mess up a good saying. They’re probably mixing up that nursery rhyme about Little Jack Horner and that saying about opinions. At least, that’s our opinion on the mattter.

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Holiday Cards: Podcast Episode 256

MR Central Command — Mon, 17 Dec 2012 10:00:41 +0000

Cards, books, and money. Isn’t that really what the holidays are about? You receive cards that look good on your mantel until the year rolls over. You receive books that you’ll never read. Or you get a card full of money. Really, those are the only three options.

Sure, there may be a bike thrown in for good measure when you’re younger. But beyond that, even as a baby who can’t read you get books. Why all the books, adults? We know that rabbits are furry. Do we really need Pat the Bunny to tell us this? If you can’t tell from looking at it that bunnies are soft, then you’re in for a lifetime of hardships. Or soft ships.

You probably don’t want to use soft ships, or “rafts” as they are most commonly known. At least, not on the ocean. A raft is like a serving platter for sharks.

What were we talking about? Oh yeah, the podcast. Listen to the new podcast. It’s about the holidays, we think. And happy Terrance Day to you.

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Go to Hell: Podcast Episode 255

MR Central Command — Mon, 10 Dec 2012 09:00:21 +0000

Hell and decorating are the topics of this Mustache Rangers podcast episode. More decorating than hell, but “go to decoration school” isn’t a very catchy podcast title. Maybe you have a better idea for a title. Well, you can shove it. We don’t want to hear it. Make your own damn podcast. Leave us along. Enjoy!

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Andrew Zimmern: Podcast Episode 254

MR Central Command — Mon, 26 Nov 2012 09:00:47 +0000

Andrew Zimmern, host of Bizarre Foods and the Go Fork Yourself podcast, takes time out of his busy schedule to deliver some very urgent news to the Mustache Rangers. Will it be food related news? Yes. Sorry, spoiler alert.

You can see Andrew Zimmern live at HUGE Improv Theater, home of the Mustache Rangers, on December 10th at 8pm. You can find more information on seeing Andrew Zimmern or the Mustache Rangers on stage at hugetheater.com.

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Secure: Podcast Episode 253

MR Central Command — Mon, 12 Nov 2012 09:00:20 +0000

Security cameras, Big Brother, and ghosts invade the personal space of the Mustache Rangers in this podcast episode. This is the episode that was actually recorded for Halloween. Whoops? Enjoy it anyway. Don’t worry, there is no candy involved. You won’t have to suspend your disbelief too much.

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Get Political: Podcast Episode 252

MR Central Command — Mon, 05 Nov 2012 09:00:59 +0000

A podcast about politics the day before a major election? It’s like we planned this or something.

Don’t worry. Your values won’t be challenged. It’s mostly talk about teeth and aspirations. You know, things you talk about every day. Anywho, enjoy this Mustache Rangers podcast episode.

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Trustbusters: Podcast Episode 251

MR Central Command — Mon, 29 Oct 2012 09:00:20 +0000

It is almost Halloween, and you know what that means? Podcasts with a vaguely spooky theme, but not really! This podcast is really about board games. If there is anything better than playing a board game, it’s listening to two people bicker about it. So listen, already!

And don’t forget! The Mustache Rangers return to HUGE Improv Theater this Friday at 9:30pm. Come for the 8pm show and enjoy our show on the same ticket! Look at all the money you’re saving on entertainment!

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Podcast Episode 250 Live: Podcast Episode 250: Redundant

MR Central Command — Thu, 25 Oct 2012 09:00:22 +0000

The milestone that is a quarter of a milestone, the Mustache Rangers have reached episode 250 of their celebrated podcast. Enjoy this special episode, recorded live in front of an audience at HUGE Improv Theater in Minneapolis, MN.

The video of the show, including a look backstage, is still available right here

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Podcast Episode 250 Live

MR Central Command — Sun, 21 Oct 2012 00:46:40 +0000

The video (or, still frames with audio) is up! The audio version of the podcast will be coming in the next day or two. Thanks to everyone who watched episode 250 live!

Also, you can skip to the performance about 18 minutes it. Or you can watch the whole thing and get a peek into how we warm up and put on our mustaches.

Video streaming by Ustream

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Spider Hats: Podcast Episode 249

MR Central Command — Mon, 15 Oct 2012 09:00:54 +0000

With our feet stuck well into the muck that is October, it’s only proper to have an arachnid-centric episode. If you live in a place where spiders can’t rot your skin if you’re bit, you have no right to be afraid of spider. In case you were wondering.

Spiders and hats will bring you smiles in this podcast episode. We think.

Edit: Two separate spider hat related jokes in one week? What does it mean, internet? See Zach Stafford’s Extra Fabulous Comics.

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Get a Bonus: Podcast Episode 248

MR Central Command — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 09:00:37 +0000

Temperatures are discussed in this podcast episode. After all, we know what our audience wants. Lots of talk about being too hot or too cold. Afghans aren’t brought up, but they are a great way to keep you both warm and cold at the same time. We don’t know why we’re telling you this. Listen to the podcast already, dummy.

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Beard Patrolmen: Podcast Episode 247

MR Central Command — Mon, 24 Sep 2012 10:00:44 +0000

The “gentlemen” from the Shoddy Radio podcast join the Mustache Rangers this week playing the Beard Patrolmen. For those of you who didn’t see the live show the Mustache Rangers did that one time, the Beard Patrolmen are the greatest enemies of the Mustache Rangers.

Speaking of live shows, the Mustache Rangers will be performing their 250th podcast episode LIVE onstage and online on October 21st, 2012. If you live in Minneosta, go the Improv a Go-Go at HUGE Improv Theater to see the performance. If you live not where we just said, stay tuned for details on where you can stream the performance live!

Now, enjoy this current podcast episode!

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Can’t Imagine: Podcast Episode 246

MR Central Command — Mon, 17 Sep 2012 09:00:35 +0000

We know what you’re thinking. Where have you been, Mustache Rangers? But you thought it with a real twinge of attitude, so we won’t answer you. Next time, when you think of something you might possibly ask, you had better check yourself before you Rex Urselph. Don’t know how that phrase became so popular. Anyway.

Imagination, or the lack of imagination, is the target of this podcast episode. Empty your mind as you listen in.

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Jasmine Memories: Podcast Episode 245

MR Central Command — Mon, 20 Aug 2012 09:00:59 +0000

Scents and tastes can strongly evoke memories and emotions. But can a taste take a memory away?

Probably not. But that won’t stop the Mustache Rangers from going on and on about it in this podcast episode. Honestly, can’t they shut up for, like, 2 minutes? Some of us are trying to sleep.

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How the Bread is Made

MR Central Command — Tue, 07 Aug 2012 14:03:40 +0000

We know! You hate this podcast drought! But things have been busy are Mustache Rangers Central Command. There is a lot of theater going on. We think it is some kind of virus. A thespian virus. Don’t let any actors bite you.

Until a new show goes up, you can listen to Aric talk about how the Mustache Rangers podcast is made on the Seekrit Projekt podcast.

No, spell check. That’s how it’s spelled. Leave me alone.

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Tell It Again: Podcast Episode 244

MR Central Command — Mon, 16 Jul 2012 09:00:30 +0000

Facebook is a giant waste of time, second only to listening to people tell stories you’ve already heard. If there were a way to monetize that, we’d be billionaires by now. But you can’t sell ad space in old stories.

The Mustache Rangers tell old stories in this podcast episode. Enjoy it in your own time and in your own way.

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Advertise: Podcast Episode 243

MR Central Command — Mon, 09 Jul 2012 09:00:03 +0000

It may comes as quite a shock to you that advertisers bend the truth to get their products sold. Or, it may come as no shock at all. We can’t assume to know your educational background. Do you know what badminton is? Badminton looks like fun, but it is terrible. That’s what advertising does to you.

The Mustache Rangers discuss the perils of adverting in this comedy podcast of theirs. Eat it up with your ears. And enjoy a special guest message from Succotash, the Comedy Podcast Podcast.

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Squeamish: Podcast Episode 242

MR Central Command — Mon, 02 Jul 2012 09:00:34 +0000

It’s easy to be squeamish. After all, who knows what the cat dropped into your shoe last night? The Mustache Rangers explore the feeling of squeamishness in this podcast.

Have you checked your shoes yet? You should. And cedar shoe trees would really clear this whole situation up.

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Remove Pants: Podcast Episode 241

MR Central Command — Mon, 25 Jun 2012 09:00:34 +0000

Monica Hamburg of the S&M Rants Podcast joins the Mustache Rangers in this podcast where the freedom of the human form is discovered and uncovered. Or maybe it’s just a bunch of giggling. I mean, all that flesh can be awfully funny. So many lumps of different shapes and sizes. Enjoy.

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Black Tie: Podcast Episode 240

MR Central Command — Mon, 18 Jun 2012 09:00:48 +0000

Black tie events are fun, probably. We’ve never been to one. There are probably a lot of hi-jinks there, mostly involving punch bowls and swimming pools with retractable covers.

This podcast features assumptions about black tie events, mostly based on movies. Mostly based on Kubrick movies. Mainly, the Shining.

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Create Jobs: Podcast Episode 239

MR Central Command — Mon, 04 Jun 2012 09:00:41 +0000

Creating jobs isn’t easy, as this week’s podcast will attest. Sure, you could simply copy the jobs that are already there, but that is boring. If you’re doing it right, you need to think of a job that has never existed before. Like bread wearer or box car kisser. We’re just spit-balling here. Although, those would be amazing jobs.

The Mustache Rangers talk jobs in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy it in complete silence.

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Etsy: Podcast Episode 238

MR Central Command — Mon, 21 May 2012 09:00:02 +0000

You could make a millions dollars by stealing all the ideas that the Mustache Rangers have in their podcast. And then the Mustache Rangers would make those million dollars by suing you. But they’d smile while suing you. And really, isn’t a smile like a hug? Would anyone bad hug you? NO!

Enjoy this week’s comedy podcast adventure thing.

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Last Resort: Podcast Episode 237

MR Central Command — Mon, 14 May 2012 09:00:33 +0000

We really don’t know why you’re reading this. Podcasts are an audio medium. Just listen to the show already. You know these descriptions never have anything to do with what goes on in the episode anyway. You should have learned that by now. Anyway, how are you? It’s been a while. We took up a hobby.

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Snap: Podcast Episode 236

MR Central Command — Mon, 30 Apr 2012 09:00:53 +0000

Waiters, take note. You are legally obligated to pee into the soup of anyone who snaps at you. How else will those people ever learn to stop snapping their fingers at people? This is your duty, waitrons.

The Mustache Rangers deals with snaps and claps in this week’s episode. Store it in your brain.

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Brett Favre: Podcast Episode 235

MR Central Command — Mon, 16 Apr 2012 09:00:37 +0000

There are certain things that Brett Favre is known for. Throwing a football, for instance. Or wearing rings, as an example. Today’s podcast is about the other thing. You know what we’re talking about. There’s something about Brett Favre.

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Assume: Podcast Episode 234

MR Central Command — Mon, 09 Apr 2012 09:00:22 +0000

Assumptions are what differentiate man from the beasts. Squirrels assume that tree branch will hold their weight. Humans draw a diagram about why a tree branch can’t hold their weight. Oh humans. Just jump!

The Mustache Rangers assume many things in this week’s podcast adventure. We assume.

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Ranger Normal: Podcast Episode 233

MR Central Command — Mon, 02 Apr 2012 10:00:38 +0000

The Mustache Rangers are back, and they’re joined by the crew from the Sex is Fun podcast. So prepare your ears accordingly. Perhaps you are at work. Try not being at work. Okay. At home now? Good.

In fact, if you need MORE Mustache Rangers this week, you can hear a special Mustache Rangers episode of the Sex is Fun podcast right here!.

The Sex is Fun podcast is dedicated to the rational discussion of human sexuality from the approach of fun, enjoyment and pleasure. We recommend rationality. It’s pretty great.

Enough jabber. Listen in!

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Back Soon?

MR Central Command — Mon, 26 Mar 2012 14:32:19 +0000

We’re sorry for the unexpected hiatus. Family stuff and happenstance. Don’t worry. We should be back next week? Notice the question mark. We are not committing, but hopeful.

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The Pits: Podcast Episode 232

MR Central Command — Mon, 05 Mar 2012 09:00:42 +0000

Nobody likes snakes. Even the dudes who wear snakes as a fashion statement are scared to death of them. They simply think the constant risk of death is worth it if a pretty lady looks their way. Bonus points if she looks their way with an expression that is not disgust.

The Mustache Rangers talk about snakes in this week’s podcast episode. Don’t freak out.

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Fear: Podcast Episode 231

MR Central Command — Mon, 27 Feb 2012 09:00:29 +0000

Fear. Does it hurt more than it helps? Sandwiches. Have you had more bad sandwiches than good? Chairs. Still trust them? Listen to this week’s Mustache Rangers episode and you may start to question everything you understand about everything.

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Quest: Podcast Episode 230

MR Central Command — Mon, 13 Feb 2012 19:50:37 +0000

Skyrim and Diablo 3 are the games of the hour. In Skyrim and Diablo, you go on quests. In this week’s Mustache Rangers podcast episode, they talk about quests. Does that mean that everyone who plays Skyrim or Diablo 3 should listen to the Mustache Rangers? It couldn’t hurt.

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Take Liberties: Podcast Episode 229

MR Central Command — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 09:00:49 +0000

Everyone tells stories. Even rocks, if you put a robot mouth on them and tell the robot mouth to say approximately what you think a rock would say. It’s mostly “I’m dry” or “I’m wet.” Rocks are very aware of their hydration levels.

The Mustache Rangers jabber on about stories and how they should be told in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy it while surrounded by your loved ones.

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A Short Intermission

MR Central Command — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 15:45:57 +0000

The Mustache Rangers podcast will be taking a short two week intermission. With the avalanche of live shows we have been and will be doing, our time has become a little limited. But do not fret! We will be back on track shortly!

Take this time to listen to older podcasts, share with your friends, and get out to one of our live shows at HUGE Improv Theater.

Thanks for continuing to listen! We probably love you.

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The Secondary Objective: Podcast Episode 228

MR Central Command — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 10:00:46 +0000

Video games make their influence known as the Mustache Rangers work on confirming their secondary objective in this podcast episode. Will they have to hack three computers or find the secret music box? You’ll have to listen to find out. Or have a courtroom stenographer type out this week’s episode for you and have them read it back. That’d probably be fun for you, yeah?

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Take Flight: Podcast Episode 227

MR Central Command — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 09:00:41 +0000

The serious topic of body alteration is used for the light fun in this Mustache Rangers podcast episode. Did you see that guy who put magnets under his skin so he could attach some devil horns? I mean, really. Come on, guy. Give that surgery money to me! I’d spend it on so much gum!

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Top Ways to Get People to Visit Your Website

MR Central Command — Tue, 03 Jan 2012 17:00:12 +0000

1. Make a list

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Anti-Comedy: Podcast Episode 226

MR Central Command — Mon, 02 Jan 2012 09:00:34 +0000

The Comedy Album and artistic interpretation are the main talking points in this Mustache Rangers podcast episode. And the squabbling. There is always a bit of that, isn’t there?

You think, over hundreds of years, you’d eventually work out the kinks in a friendship. The reality is, the kinks keep getting worse. It’s sad, in a way. Or, actually, it’s funny. It had better be funny. This is a comedy podcast after all.

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Change-Up: Podcast Episode 225

MR Central Command — Mon, 19 Dec 2011 09:00:03 +0000

Terrance Day is winter solstice tradition that keeps the Mustache Rangers going. Aside from a genetically altered panda delivering gifts, very little information has come out about the traditions of Terrance Day. Until this podcast! Bring your loved ones around the fire and listen to this holiday themed podcast. We think you might learn something about yourself.

You can also listen to the episode that originated Terrance Day right here.

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Turn Inside Out: Podcast Episode 224

MR Central Command — Mon, 12 Dec 2011 09:00:21 +0000

Internal organs, what they can do and what they can’t do, are the pain topics of contention on this Mustache Rangers podcast episode.

Now, keep in mind, the Mustache Rangers are not doctors. At least, not doctors in the traditional sense. If you would consider “someone who eats a certain brand of breakfast cereal because they think it will keep them healthy” a doctor, then the Mustache Rangers are most certainly doctors. But, you most certainly don’t think that.

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Weak: Podcast Episode 223

MR Central Command — Mon, 05 Dec 2011 09:00:16 +0000

Denim and weakness. What do they have in common? Why would you read the answer in a blog post when you could listen to it in a podcast? Today is your lucky day, because the Mustache Rangers explore the topics of denim and weakness! All in one podcast episode! For free! How lucky are you? You should call your best friend and brag about how lucky you are.

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Interrupted: Podcast Episode 222

MR Central Command — Mon, 28 Nov 2011 09:00:02 +0000

We can’t blame you to listening to the Minneapolis St Paul Magazine best podcast of 2011. We would too, if we weren’t living it.

In this podcast episode, the Mustache Rangers learn how rude it is to interrupt someone. And then some other stuff happens.

Metal sound provided by acclivity at FreeSound.org
Jelly bean sound provided by lsprice at FreeSound.org

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Get Graphic: Podcast Episode 221

MR Central Command — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 09:00:35 +0000

Graphic novels are for everybody. Sure, that what the geek at the store keeps telling you, but that doesn’t make it less true.

The Mustache Rangers work on their very own graphic novel in this comedy podcast adventure.

The post Get Graphic: Podcast Episode 221 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Watch the Ham: Podcast Episode 220

MR Central Command — Mon, 14 Nov 2011 10:00:31 +0000

Podcast podcast blah blah blah ham. Listen. November 16th is Give to the Max day in Minnesota. It’s a day to donate to non-profits and to have your donations matched in different ways.

The Mustache Rangers will be raising money for HUGE Improv Theater, our home theater, on November 16th. If you would consider a donation, we would be forever grateful. And any donation made through http://bit.ly/givemustache counts towards are fundraising efforts.

The improv team that raises the most money will receive 6 plane tickets, to get out to different improv festivals across the country.

Only donations on the 16th count towards the goal. If you donate, make sure it is on November 16th.

So, if you have listened to the podcast or have seen our live show, please consider helping HUGE Improv Theater and helping us by donating at http://bit.ly/givemustache. Thank you! Now, enjoy the show!

The post Watch the Ham: Podcast Episode 220 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Toilet paper orientation – Computer-pedia

MR Central Command — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 15:48:02 +0000

(photo by Aaron Landry)

" data-medium-file="http://mustacherangers.com/wp-content/uploads/toilet_paper-300x225.jpg" data-large-file="http://mustacherangers.com/wp-content/uploads/toilet_paper.jpg" loading="lazy" src="http://mustacherangers.com/wp-content/uploads/toilet_paper-300x225.jpg" alt="" title="Toilet Paper Approval" width="300" height="225" class="size-medium wp-image-1040" srcset="http://mustacherangers.com/wp-content/uploads/toilet_paper-300x225.jpg 300w, http://mustacherangers.com/wp-content/uploads/toilet_paper.jpg 640w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />

(photo by Aaron Landry)

Toilet paper is something you put gross stuff that comes out of your body on. It is made out of trees, like rocking horses. Sometimes it is quilted by little church ladies and sometimes it is made by bears. Do you understand what toilet paper is now? Good. Now on to the “orientation” part of this article.

Toilet paper orientation is an issue created by stand-up comedians. They think that, when locked in a horizontal position, there is a best way for toilet paper to fall. The two options are over the top or down the back. We won’t even get into worm holes being used to solve this “problem.” It isn’t a problem. Who cares?

Do you know how many marriages ended in comedy related observations before stand-up comedians were invented? One percent. And after Einstein invented stand-up comedy? Two percent. That’s double what it used to be!

The proper reaction to someone talking about the correct orientation of toilet paper is to sock them in the teeth. You should be wearing chain mail gloves while doing this. No sense in cutting your knuckles up.

Here are other things that dumb dummies think are issues but are not:

Toilet seat position (so toilet obsessed)
How toast hits the floor
Babies on airplanes
Babies in dumpsters
Reaganomics
How bitches be trippin

Who regrets never having figured out the toilet paper orientation issue on their death bed? Nobody! Instead they’re all, like, “Oh, I’m so mortal. I wish I was a computer.” Chumps.

The post Toilet paper orientation – Computer-pedia appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Whoops a Daisy

MR Central Command — Mon, 07 Nov 2011 15:14:19 +0000

We know, we know! You love you Monday podcast updates. And we love you. But it isn’t going to happen this week. The immeasurably insignificant gravitational pull of aligning planets have caused our crab signs to fight some bulls. Or something. Anyways, there will be a new podcast up next week.

In the meantime, why not check out the new shows that will be going up at the NoisePicnic podcasting network this week? You don’t have to answer “why not.” That was more of just a thing to say. But you can answer it if you like. Why not?

The post Whoops a Daisy appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Angry at David Malki: Podcast Episode 219

MR Central Command — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 10:00:51 +0000

David Malki, creator of Wondermark and co-editor of the Machine of Death, lends his vocal talents to this Mustache Rangers comedy podcast. If you have been waiting for an episode filled with yelling, you can stop waiting. It is here to hear!

Water sound effects provided by Benboncan from FreeSound.org.

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Cliche: Podcast Episode 218

MR Central Command — Mon, 24 Oct 2011 10:00:39 +0000

A phrase or cliche has a life of its own. Once said, it will either sprout wings and play upon the gentle winds of humanity forever or it will fall to the ground and be crushed like the onion under a mountain.

For example. Do you think “looks like rain today” is a phrase that will live on eternally through the human culture or will it turn to dust the second it leaves your stupid mouth? C’mon! Think of something interesting to say for once, Larry!

The Mustache Rangers discuss cliches in this comedy podcast episode. Share it with your social community, so they don’t think all you have to share are cat pictures.

The post Cliche: Podcast Episode 218 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Manuel Carbonell: Computer-pedia

MR Central Command — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 17:13:32 +0000

Manuel Carbonell, the last of the Cuban Master Sculptors. He was a guy who looked at a piece of wood and said, “That ain’t no wood. I see an eagle or something crazy in there.” And then he used a tooth brush to carve out that crazy thing. Maybe not a toothbrush. Probably a chisel or something. I don’t know.

(photo by Joyce Lowry)

" data-medium-file="http://mustacherangers.com/wp-content/uploads/manuel_carbonell.jpg" data-large-file="http://mustacherangers.com/wp-content/uploads/manuel_carbonell.jpg" loading="lazy" src="http://mustacherangers.com/wp-content/uploads/manuel_carbonell.jpg" alt="" title=""Amantes" by Manuel Carbonell" width="240" height="180" class="size-full wp-image-960" />

(photo by Joyce Lowry)

So, anyways, Manuel is still alive. But he’s very old. So hold on to those sculptures. Also, I asked him “don’t you hate Cuba” and he was “no, Cuba is awesome and sexy.” Whatever. I didn’t really care.

When asked what kind of board games Manuel liked, he said Monopoly. That was kind of weird for someone from a communist nation. He might have said CandyLand. Google Translate was kinda iffy on the whole thing. He said “dulces de la tierra.” Sounds like Monopoly, right?

Current sculptures by Manuel look like the ship from Flight of the Navigator, painted black, squished, and stretch. They also sound like Paul Rubens. You have to listen real close though.

So, to wrap up this entry, have you ever seen a bird and you didn’t know what it was? That’s the only time anyone ever uses a bird book. Well, a coaster too. To look up birds and act as a coaster.

The post Manuel Carbonell: Computer-pedia appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Meet the Apple Sisters: Podcast Episode 217

MR Central Command — Mon, 17 Oct 2011 10:00:27 +0000

The Apple Sisters join the Mustache Rangers in this very special podcast episode. What happens while guys who speak in an olde tyme way meet up with gals who speak in an olde tyme way? There’s only one way to find out! That’s by using your head holes and listening up.

And make sure to listen to the Apple Sisters on their own podcast at Earwolf.com. Seriously, we shouldn’t even have to tell you that. You should already be doing it.

The post Meet the Apple Sisters: Podcast Episode 217 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Greatest Idea: Podcast Episode 216

MR Central Command — Mon, 10 Oct 2011 10:00:56 +0000

Accepting the quirks in people you spend a lot of time with is a must. Unless you are a prison guard. In which case, guard those prisoners! Quit chatting it up with them! They’re trying to get inside your head!

The Mustache Rangers discuss their quirks in this podcast episode.

The post The Greatest Idea: Podcast Episode 216 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Get a Tan: Podcast Episode 215

MR Central Command — Mon, 03 Oct 2011 10:00:07 +0000

Gift giving and receiving. What a mess, right? Well, the Mustache Rangers may have just found the solution to gift giving in this comedy-podcast-adventure-asode.

The post Get a Tan: Podcast Episode 215 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Get a Gold Star: Podcast Episode 214

MR Central Command — Mon, 26 Sep 2011 10:00:15 +0000

Accolades and recognizing the importance of your employees are the convoluted topics of the day on this Mustache Rangers podcast episode. Get your best gal, go out, have a nice dinner, driver her home, then drive yourself home, then listen to the podcast.

The post Get a Gold Star: Podcast Episode 214 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Are Vein: Podcast Episode 213

MR Central Command — Mon, 19 Sep 2011 10:00:39 +0000

Get rich quick schemes are only good if the schemes are quick. If they are not, then you have yourself a get rich scheme. And if you don’t have the scheme figured out, then you simply get rich. The lesson here is, drop the schemes.

The Mustache Rangers scheme their little hearts and veins out in this comedy podcast adventure.

The post Are Vein: Podcast Episode 213 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Get Infected with Scott Sigler: Podcast Episode 212

MR Central Command — Mon, 12 Sep 2011 10:00:41 +0000

New York Times bestselling author Scott Sigler joins the Mustache Rangers in this week’s virus filled podcast episode. Do not worry. They are not computer viruses. Just the normal horrible kind of virus.

Follow Scott Sigler on Twitter @ScottSigler, head to his website at ScottSigler.com, and buy his astonishingly well researched scifi horror novels. They are amazing.

Are you still reading this? You should be listening to the podcast.

The post Get Infected with Scott Sigler: Podcast Episode 212 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Yummy Fingers: Podcast Episode 211

MR Central Command — Mon, 05 Sep 2011 10:00:37 +0000

Sometimes we just want to be noticed. That’s why city folks wear overalls, after all. It’s the little quirks that make people say “hey, I like/hate that guy/girl.” And really, isn’t that all we really want/don’t want to hear? The Mustache Rangers figure out their own quirks in this podcast adventure.

After listening to the podcast (at the bottom of the page) feel free to watch the companion video to this episode (above the podcast. Weird, right? Deal with it).

The post Yummy Fingers: Podcast Episode 211 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Come Up Shorts: Podcast Episode 210

MR Central Command — Mon, 29 Aug 2011 10:00:56 +0000

Teamwork are the orders of the day, as the Mustache Rangers imagine how to become the chief celebrities of an alien race, in this comedy podcast episode. The “comedy” stands for “comedic.”

The post Come Up Shorts: Podcast Episode 210 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Do Nothing: Podcast Episode 209

MR Central Command — Mon, 22 Aug 2011 10:00:34 +0000

What is more useless than doing nothing? That’s right! Talking about doing nothing. Prepare yourself for the most useless podcast episode to ever exist.

The post Do Nothing: Podcast Episode 209 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Married?: Podcast Episode 208

MR Central Command — Mon, 15 Aug 2011 10:00:11 +0000

Have you ever wondered what When Harry Met Sally would be like if it starred two guys traveling through space? Wonder no longer, as this podcast episode spells it out for you! Enjoy!

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Addicted: Podcast Episode 207

MR Central Command — Mon, 08 Aug 2011 10:00:26 +0000

Video games! The kids love them! So do Mustache Rangers! But what will happen when video games come between the Mustache Rangers? Listen to this podcast and find out!

The post Addicted: Podcast Episode 207 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Link: Podcast Episode 206

MR Central Command — Mon, 01 Aug 2011 10:00:47 +0000

Does and don’ts of formal dress are the topic of conversation between the Mustache Rangers for this comedy podcast episode. Enjoy it with someone you want to argue with.

The post Link: Podcast Episode 206 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Abilene Paradox: Podcast Episode 205

MR Central Command — Mon, 25 Jul 2011 10:00:59 +0000

If the fate of the world ever hinged on where everybody wanted to eat, we would all be doomed. The Mustache Rangers decide on what to do for dinner in this thrilling podcast adventure!

For more information on the Abilene paradox, please visit Wikipedia. With your help, we can wipe it out once and for all!

The post Abilene Paradox: Podcast Episode 205 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Mustache Rangers Classic

MR Central Command — Thu, 21 Jul 2011 19:27:43 +0000

The Mustache Rangers have a new podcast! Sort of. This week NoisePicnic, a podcasting network for creative and talented podcasters created by Aric McKeown and Mike Fotis, launched. And one of the featured podcasts is Mustache Rangers Classic!

Mustache Rangers Classic is a new take on the oldest Mustache Rangers episodes. Starting from episode number one, the audio is being cleaned for a more pleasant listening experience. The podcasts will also be re-edited, or edited for the first time, to make them snappier and more fun to listen to.

I know. We all love long awkward pauses. But maybe less will be better. And not “maybe” but “certainly.”

New Mustache Rangers episodes will continue to be published here, but for a trip into the pleasant past you should check out NoisePicnic and Mustache Rangers Classic!

The post Mustache Rangers Classic appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Wake Up: Podcast Episode 204

MR Central Command — Mon, 18 Jul 2011 10:00:21 +0000

The boundless opportunity of a lazy day is explored by the Mustache Rangers in this podcast episode. Enjoy it, if you know what is good for you. Or if you mom tells you to.

The post Wake Up: Podcast Episode 204 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Have Two Pages Left: Podcast Episode 203

MR Central Command — Mon, 11 Jul 2011 10:00:21 +0000

Famous works of literature and knowing when to be quiet are the focus of this Mustache Rangers comedy podcast. But you already knew that.

The post Have Two Pages Left: Podcast Episode 203 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Visit the Capitol With The Wrestling Team: Podcast Episode 202

MR Central Command — Mon, 04 Jul 2011 10:00:43 +0000

The comedy and podcast duo Wrestling Team joins the Mustache Rangers as they visit one of Washington, D.C.’s most famous landmarks in this comedy podcast episode.

The post Visit the Capitol With The Wrestling Team: Podcast Episode 202 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Sell Out

MR Central Command — Mon, 27 Jun 2011 17:12:57 +0000

Starting July 7th, the Mustache Rangers live stage show returns to HUGE Improv Theater. Join the Mustache Rangers and special guests Deutschland as they bring you an evening of entertainment for the low price of $5.

But, hold on one second! If one of the six Mustache Rangers shows sells out, the remaining shows are free! So if the July 7th show sells out, then you can see the remaining five shows for the low price of $0.

Pass the news around. The Mustache Rangers would love to put on a free show for you. Get everyone you know to the July 7th show.

8pm. HUGE Improv Theater. Don’t miss it.

The post The Mustache Rangers Sell Out appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Fight Dragons: Podcast Episode 201

MR Central Command — Mon, 27 Jun 2011 10:00:12 +0000

The existence and size of dragons are the topic of debate on this Mustache Rangers comedy podcast episode. Share it with someone you love. Especially if you haven’t told them you love them yet. And then they’ll see this message and be, all, like, “me too!” Or “I shouldn’t have made so much eye contact with that guy at the DMV. Now he’s sending me links to podcasts.”

The post Fight Dragons: Podcast Episode 201 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Turn 200: Podcast Episode 200

MR Central Command — Mon, 20 Jun 2011 10:00:46 +0000

Lefse is the topic of the hour for the Mustache Ranger’s monumental 200th episode. Listen to it, and then head on over to Guffaw to read an article on the Mustache Rangers. We know you like reading because you are reading this.

The post Turn 200: Podcast Episode 200 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Build a Fort: Episode 199

MR Central Command — Mon, 13 Jun 2011 10:00:34 +0000

Bickering about anything is a talent the Mustache Rangers have in spades. And hearts. This week’s podcast episode provides evidence of that fact. Go ahead! I bet there isn’t one thing you can name that the Mustache Rangers can’t bicker about.

That’s what we thought. You gave up before you even started. How sad.

The post The Mustache Rangers Build a Fort: Episode 199 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Play a Game: Episode 198

MR Central Command — Mon, 06 Jun 2011 13:42:42 +0000

The Mustache Rangers receive urgent news at the top of this week’s comedy podcast episode. Will the news be treated as urgent? If you’ve listened to even one episode before this one, you know the answer to that question. To everyone else, the answer is no. Listen, enjoy, and share with your friends.

The post The Mustache Rangers Play a Game: Episode 198 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Play God: Episode 197

MR Central Command — Mon, 30 May 2011 07:00:22 +0000

Nature meets madness in this week’s Mustache Rangers podcast episode. Who will prevail? You’ll have to listen to find out. Or you could bribe us and we’ll tell you without having to listen to the podcast. We can be bribed very easily.

The post The Mustache Rangers Play God: Episode 197 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Great Mustache Rangers Equipment Upgrade!

MR Central Command — Wed, 25 May 2011 15:59:43 +0000

The Mustache Rangers are looking for your help to upgrade their podcasting setup! Go to the Equipment Upgrade page to see how you can help! Exclamation points!

The post The Great Mustache Rangers Equipment Upgrade! appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Expand Their Minds: Episode 196

MR Central Command — Mon, 23 May 2011 09:00:44 +0000

You may hear people tell you to keep an open mind. If you don’t, you probably don’t have your own opinion about anything. You should form some opinion, so people can tell you to change them.

The Mustache Rangers explore imagination in this week’s comedy podcast episode. Enjoy all of its things.

The post The Mustache Rangers Expand Their Minds: Episode 196 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Return: Episode 195

MR Central Command — Mon, 16 May 2011 08:00:59 +0000

Summer is right around the corner, and that means movies. And movies mean sequels. And sequels mean prequels. And prequels mean the next one will probably be in space. Space! Just like the Mustache Rangers!

The Mustache Rangers talk movies in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy it on the beach. Or in your cubical. Probably in your cubicle. You should probably get up and stretch your legs. You don’t want knee clots.

The post The Mustache Rangers Return: Episode 195 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Do Taxes: Episode 194

MR Central Command — Mon, 09 May 2011 09:00:40 +0000

Topic humor is always a gamble. That’s why the Mustache Rangers are waited a good few weeks before doing their an episode on taxes. There is no time like the present to talk about something in the past, after all! Enjoy this week’s podcast episode.

The post The Mustache Rangers Do Taxes: Episode 194 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Are Traumatized: Episode 193

MR Central Command — Mon, 02 May 2011 10:00:53 +0000

Finally, the Mustache Rangers have grasped control of the podcast away from Computer. Open your ears and receive the amazing deep space conversation that has no rising action or consequences. And tell your friends.

The post The Mustache Rangers Are Traumatized: Episode 193 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Computer is Motivational

MR Central Command — Mon, 25 Apr 2011 08:00:08 +0000

Once again, Computer has taken over the Mustache Rangers podcast. Today, Computer tries his hand at being motivational. Or, not hand. What do computers have instead of hands? Data? Anyway.

If you would like to order a call from Computer for someone you know, check out this page right here. Otherwise, just listen to the podcast already!

The post Computer is Motivational appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Computer Makes a Call

MR Central Command — Mon, 18 Apr 2011 10:00:53 +0000

Computer got the password to something or other and now he’s putting up his own podcast. Sorry, folks. Nothing we can do about it. We’ll try threatening with a hammer some more.

Might as well listen to it while you’re at it.

The post Computer Makes a Call appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Stay Weird: Episode 192

MR Central Command — Mon, 11 Apr 2011 09:00:58 +0000

If this is your first time listening to the Mustache Rangers, how about you stop, take a breath, and pick a different episode. Because, honestly, this one is pretty weird.

Now, let us all say grace and start listening.

The post The Mustache Rangers Stay Weird: Episode 192 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers and Words: Episode 191

MR Central Command — Mon, 04 Apr 2011 10:00:23 +0000

The Mustache Rangers have worked up the courage to make another podcast for you this week. The looked deep inside themselves, combated the lazy demons of laziness, and produced this audio entertainment for you. It’s probably because they like you and your fancy new haircut.

Listen to this podcast right now. Any hesitation is wasted time. And we only have so much of that stuff left.

The post The Mustache Rangers and Words: Episode 191 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

150 Review Challenge

MR Central Command — Mon, 28 Mar 2011 16:23:44 +0000

Here’s the deal. The ratings and reviews on the iTunes listing for the Mustache Rangers are lacking. Don’t get us wrong. We deeply appreciate everyone who has left a review so far. But we need more.

iTunes is how a majority of listeners find new podcasts. Ratings and reviews are how iTunes determines which podcasts they should feature on their site. So to grow the Mustache Rangers audience, we need more ratings and reviews.

We are looking to boost our current number of ratings, which is sitting at 42, to 150.

So, you want a reward huh? Well, we’ll give you more podcasts. You may or may not know that Computer has been calling folks. And he may or may not know that we have been recording these calls.

Well, if we make the goal of 150 iTunes ratings (don’t skimp on the reviews either), then we will begin to release these computer calls as podcasts for everyone to enjoy.

We know you’re already listening to the podcast. So please, if you would be so kind, leave a rating and review on iTunes and encourage others to do the same.

The post 150 Review Challenge appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Are Just: Episode 190

MR Central Command — Mon, 28 Mar 2011 09:00:04 +0000

It must be really tough to be a judge. Your eyebrows must get tired as heck from frowning all the time.

The Mustache Rangers have a comedy podcast for you this week. Enjoy it. Maybe while eating breakfast. What’s that, sausage and eggs? Boy, someone is a lucky hubby.

The post The Mustache Rangers Are Just: Episode 190 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Take the Bus: Episode 189

MR Central Command — Mon, 21 Mar 2011 09:00:44 +0000

What do you think happens to buses after the drivers go home? There should probably be a computer animated movie about that. Somebody get on it.

The Mustache Rangers have another podcast for you this week. Surprised? Quit being surprised. That’s dumb and useless.

The post The Mustache Rangers Take the Bus: Episode 189 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Talk Books: Episode 188

MR Central Command — Mon, 14 Mar 2011 09:00:08 +0000

Quit reading this and listen to the podcast. It’s about 7 minutes long this week. Don’t tell me you don’t have 7 minutes. Eat your sandwich real quick and then listen while it’s digesting. Jeez, do we have to figure everything out for you? We feel like mama birds.

The post The Mustache Rangers Talk Books: Episode 188 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Do It For Stuff And Giggles: Episode 187

MR Central Command — Mon, 07 Mar 2011 09:00:30 +0000

When in polite company, it is ideal to say “shut the front door” and “it’s not of your GD business” instead of their dirtier cousins, the swears. In non-polite company (burlesque dancers and pool hall attendants) you can let the swears fly.

The Mustache Rangers find a little touch of joy in this week’s comedy podcast episode. Bring it up at your next dinner event.

The post The Mustache Rangers Do It For Stuff And Giggles: Episode 187 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

HUGE Fundraiser and Mustache Rangers Auction

MR Central Command — Wed, 02 Mar 2011 14:53:05 +0000

The 2nd Annual HUGE Improv Theater Fundraiser is this Saturday, and it is going to be a heck of a show. Rich Sommer, of Mad Men and The Office, and Justin Pierre, of Motion City Soundtrack, will be there along with one of the two Mustache Rangers.

But beyond that, there will be a silent auction to raise money for HUGE. And the Mustache Rangers have donated their time to the auction in the form of An Awkward Dinner with the Mustache Rangers. The winners of this auction will get to spend an awkward night at the Shout House piano bar with the Mustache Rangers. What sort of stilted and hilarious conversation will occur? You’ll have to bid, and win, to find out!

Details on the entire evening are below. Please come, enjoy, and support HUGE Improv Theater and the improv community in Minneapolis!

What: HUGE Theaterâ€s 2nd Annual Fundraiser, a night to support improvisation in the Twin Cities

Where: HUGE Theater
3037 Lyndale Ave South, Minneapolis

When: Saturday, March 5
Doors: 7pm, Show at 8pm

Who: The cast of HUGE Theater plus special guests Justin Pierre (Motion City Soundtrack) and Rich Sommer (Mad Men, The Office)

How: RSVP to reservations@hugetheater.com

How Much: $20

Details:
Itâ€s been just one year since the folks behind HUGE Improv Theater had their first fundraiser to give scenic improvisation a home in the Twin Cities.

Thanks to people like you, HUGE exists! The theater hosts six nights of shows a week and hundreds of improv fans have come through the doors.

But your support is as crucial as ever. You can help ensure improvisation has a dedicated space in the Twin Cities for years to come.

We hope youâ€ll join us for our second annual fundraiser Saturday March 5th, a night to support HUGE Theater and Twin Cities improv.

Youâ€ll be treated to an all-star show from the best improvisers in the state. Plus Justin Pierre of Motion City Soundtrack and Rich Sommer of Mad Men will join us as part of Matt Donnellyâ€s Celebrity Tarot Lounge.

Donâ€t miss what promises to be an amazing evening.

The post HUGE Fundraiser and Mustache Rangers Auction appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Purchase a Call from Computer

MR Central Command — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 16:55:20 +0000

Have you ever wanted to have the Mustache Rangers’ Computer call someone you know? Well, lucky day! Now you can!

Harnessing the power of the future, you can now have Computer call your friends for the low price of 2 American dollars.

What a great gift this would be for some lucky boy or girl! Who hasn’t wanted to get sassed by a sassy space computer from space?

Click here for more information! Do not delay! Or delay all you want. We don’t care.

The post Purchase a Call from Computer appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Let the Bodies Hit: Episode 186

MR Central Command — Mon, 28 Feb 2011 09:00:43 +0000

Did the Oscars make you sad? If you said “yes” and you weren’t nominated for an Oscar, you should find a hobby. There are all sorts of models of planes in model stores that are waiting for a nice boy or girl like you.

The Mustache Rangers talk about the floor in this week’s podcast episode. Keep hydrated while you watch it.

The post The Mustache Rangers Let the Bodies Hit: Episode 186 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Description of the Day

MR Central Command — Fri, 25 Feb 2011 15:59:17 +0000

How would you describe the Mustache Rangers? Here’s what Lem Pew said.

You know how improv has rules, right? Like you have to go with what the other person says, and work with each other to build a scene. It’s like catch, you throw the ball, they catch it. Aric and Corey are like two guys playing catch where they knock the ball to the ground. Or don’t throw it. Or pretend to throw it. Or throw it behind them.

You have your own description? Email it to mustacherangers@gmail.com

The post Description of the Day appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Solve a Logic Problem: Episode 185

MR Central Command — Mon, 21 Feb 2011 09:00:22 +0000

Why not celebrate the day of Presidents by buying a used car and listening to the Mustache Rangers in your used car. The podcast will make the smell a little less noticeable.

The post The Mustache Rangers Solve a Logic Problem: Episode 185 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

An Interview With The Mustache Rangers

MR Central Command — Tue, 15 Feb 2011 15:12:11 +0000

And now, for your listening pleasure, TC Theater Connection and Josh Humphrey present an interview with the Mustache Rangers.

The post An Interview With The Mustache Rangers appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Use Their Brains: Episode 184

MR Central Command — Mon, 14 Feb 2011 09:00:08 +0000

It is Valentine’s Day today. That means nothing in space. Just like on Earth. See? We are not so different.

The Mustache Rangers explore their brains in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy its words!

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Try to Help: Podcast Episode 183

MR Central Command — Mon, 07 Feb 2011 09:00:52 +0000

It has come to our attention that sports events are happening all the time. While you’re sleeping. While you’re reading. While you’re washing the dishes. Someone will be playing sports. Of course, someone somewhere will be doing crappy theater too. It all evens out. The world is amazing.

The Mustache Rangers try to help in this comedy podcast episode. Enjoy its sound.

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The Mustache Rangers Are Ironic: Episode 182

MR Central Command — Mon, 31 Jan 2011 09:00:16 +0000

When was the last time you had dim sum? Some of that would hit the spot right about now. Sticky pork buns? That would hit the spot.

The Mustache Rangers talk about teeth on this week’s podcast adventure. Enjoy it the way you would a wine you are pretending to like.

And, as always, the Mustache Rangers perform this Thursday at HUGE Improv Theater in Minneapolis, MN. You have been ordered to go out and see it. And follow the Mustache Rangers on Twitter for chances to win free tickets to the show.

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The Mustache Rangers Consider a Sequel: Episode 181

MR Central Command — Mon, 24 Jan 2011 09:00:00 +0000

The Mustache Rangers wanted to start out the new year by destroying their resolution of never missing a podcast. Now we can move forward, live civilized human beings that are not held to the standard of a half-assed resolution.

The Mustache Rangers talk literature in this week’s podcast episode. Share it with someone. And then quote it until it gets annoying to that someone.

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How To Describe the Mustache Rangers to your Friends

MR Central Command — Thu, 06 Jan 2011 16:38:54 +0000

Performer, playwright and long-time arts and culture journalist Max Sparber made it out to the Mustache Rangers live show last week. He then went about writing the best article about the Mustache Rangers ever for MinnPost.

Most articles about Twin Cities improvisation tend to boil down to “sometimes it’s good, and sometimes it isn’t.” Max went many steps further and took in the show like it was actually legitimate theater. And it may surprise some people, but improv is legitimate theater.

The article really gives a feel for what a Mustache Rangers live show show is like, it’s characters, and how it comes together. If you have ever been at a loss for words when telling your friends about the Mustache Rangers, you can scoop up some of Max’s words and put them into your mouth to help you out.

We would like to thank Max for the very excellent article. And we would like you, reading this. Yes, you. We can hear you breathing. We would like you to pass on this article to anyone you’re trying to convince to see our show. And, of course, read it yourself. And read Max’s other articles at MinnPost.

Also, we love you. Come to the show tonight, darling. HUGE Improv Theater. 8pm. $5.

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Live shows, podcasts, and the rest

MR Central Command — Wed, 05 Jan 2011 16:42:38 +0000

First and foremost, the Mustache Rangers stage show continues on a weekly basis. Except for January 13th. If you try to see us on the 13th, you will end up feeling sad and alone. Unless someone is with you. But you’ll probably shut yourself off from that other person. Never allowing them to see the real you ever again. Don’t run the risk! But do come see the live show on January 6th, 20th, or 27th.

Second and foremost, the holidays have really done a number on the podcast schedule. Do not expect a new episode until January 24th. We do suggest listening to some older episodes. For the Great Mustache’s sake, there are 180 episodes. That should give you something to do.

Third and foremost, that is all.

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The Mustache Rangers Talk Art Again: Episode 180

MR Central Command — Mon, 20 Dec 2010 09:00:57 +0000

After flying through space for hundreds of years, you start coming upon the same topics again and again. Really, there are only a limited number of things to chat about. Most of them involve ice cream.

The Mustache Rangers talk about art, again, in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy most of it.

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Win Tickets to Thursday Night’s Live Show

MR Central Command — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 17:06:26 +0000

EDIT: We have a winner! Congrats, Andy! You can pick up your pair of free tickets at the HUGE Theater box office. It was random dumb luck, but you can pretend you won on merit.

As you may have heard, several times, the Mustache Rangers have their very own stage show. This show is put on every Thursday at the HUGE Improv Theater at 8pm.

And while the show is a low low low low $5 a ticket, you could win a pair of tickets for free! How, you may ask? It’s simple!

To win a pair of tickets, simple leave a comment below with the name of a brand new style of mustache!

Examples? You got it! How about the Frumpy Gardener? The Nose Tears? The Michael Jordan?

Easy. Now get to it! One winner will be chosen at random from the entries received before 2pm Central this Thursday.

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The Mustache Rangers Read Comics: Episode 179

MR Central Command — Mon, 13 Dec 2010 09:00:11 +0000

It’s hard to get a parking ticket in space. You need to be really neglectful. I mean, there’s open space all over. Just drive around for 5 more minutes and you’ll find a legal spot.

The Mustache Rangers talk about comic books in this week’s podcast adventure. Don’t text while listening.

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The Mustache Rangers: The Poster

MR Central Command — Tue, 07 Dec 2010 15:04:52 +0000

We know you’ve been waiting for a poster to tell you about our upcoming weekly improv show, and here it is! Look. It says all they things you want to know. Times. Addresses. Words. Pictures. Prices.

So either click on the poster or right here to reserve your tickets for the weekly Mustache Rangers improv show at HUGE Improv Theater.

We’re only going to tell you, like, a billion more times.

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The Mustache Rangers Craft a Plan: Episode 178

MR Central Command — Mon, 06 Dec 2010 09:00:41 +0000

Here is the thing about plans. They take work. And a lot of work at that. At least, if you want a well crafted plan. If you want to half-ass it, you might as well not plan at all. No use putting in half the work if it is all going to come out the same.

This week, the Mustache Rangers use all four cheeks in their podcast adventures. Enjoy all of them.

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The Mustache Rangers at HUGE Improv Theater

MR Central Command — Thu, 02 Dec 2010 21:27:12 +0000

The Mustache Rangers and long form improv in the Twin Cities as a whole has a new home. HUGE Improv Theater, located at 3037 Lyndale Ave S, Minneapolis, MN 55408, will be opening its doors this Sunday for the first show. Improv a Go-Go, which has been running for about a billion years, will be moving there after its long run at the Brave New Workshop. You should attend. It’s only one dollar!

But, looking past the opening day, the Mustache Ranger will be performing at HUGE every Thursday at 8pm starting on December 9th. That’s right. Not only can you hear the Mustache Rangers on a weekly basis on the internet, but now you can see them. Live. In the flesh.

We implore you, our fans, to come out and see us. And we implore you to tell your friends. And family. And coworkers. And the cute guy/girl at the checkout counter at Whole Foods. It’d be a great first date, probably.

But please, tell everyone you know. And show up yourself. We promise to make it a fantastically funny and entertaining show.

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The Mustache Rangers Burn It Down: Episode 177

MR Central Command — Mon, 29 Nov 2010 09:00:57 +0000

Sometimes, the Mustache Rangers miss a week of duty. Usually it is because they are out of radio contact. And even if it isn’t, it’s a pretty good blanket excuse. Plus there is a check box on the “why were you out” from for “out of radio contact.” Saves ink.

The Mustache Rangers deal with their issues (surprise surprise) in this week’s comedy podcast episode. Enjoy it sooooo much!

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Great. Ice.

MR Central Command — Mon, 22 Nov 2010 14:43:38 +0000

Ice has delayed the recording of a new podcast for this week’s listening. And by delayed, we really mean cancelled. See you next weeks, mustache heads!

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The Mustache Rangers Make Some Doe: Episode 176

MR Central Command — Mon, 15 Nov 2010 09:00:41 +0000

There isn’t a lot of roadkill in space. In fact, all road kill in space is killed on a planet and then shot into space. It stinks less up there.

The Mustache Rangers figure some things out in this week’s comedy podcast episode. Drink it down your ears.

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Origins, History, and More on Mischke

MR Central Command — Tue, 09 Nov 2010 16:27:41 +0000

In case you missed the live radio show, the Mustache Rangers were guests on The Nite Show with Mischke on 830AM WCCO in the Twin Cities. The show is up in podcast form right here if you would like a behind the scenes look at the origin of the Mustache Rangers.

The interview begins about 16 minutes in, but the whole show is excellent and we recommend you listen to it. In fact, we recommend you listen to Mischke as much as possible. He is one of the most unique, absurd, in depth, and fascinating radio hosts in the country.

So listen to the podcast interview, pass it on to friends, and give Mischke a good listen. You won’t be sorry.

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Discover: Podcast Episode 175

MR Central Command — Mon, 08 Nov 2010 09:00:11 +0000

No matter how long you’ve known somebody, there is always something new to learn about them. It gets really annoying. How many layers do you need to have? You like eggs and hate Westerns. That should be all we need to know! Get over it!

The Mustache Rangers discover new things about each other in this podcast episode. Try writing down all the words as they say same them. We bet you can’t.

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Welcome to the Mustache Rangers comedy podcast!

MR Central Command — Fri, 05 Nov 2010 13:52:21 +0000

Hey there. Welcome to the Mustache Rangers website. If this is your first time here, then you might be overwhelmed by the large number of podcasts to choose from. Well, don’t fear! We’re here to help!

The Mustache Rangers are a podcast and improv group made up of Commander Major Alastair Q. Bastidious and First Lieutenant Rutuger G. Phooneybaum. Together, they bring you weekly podcast adventures in the vein of Curb Your Enthusiasm colliding with Buck Rogers.

Why not check out a few of our favorite podcast episodes where the Mustache Rangers:

Have two pages left

Are joined by a robot

Decide on a vacation spot

Abilene Paradox

Are joined by Kevin Murphy of Mystery Science Theater 3000

Pretend to be truckers

Deal with clowns

If you like what you hear, why not subscribe on iTunes and tell all your friends about it? Why not?

And, if you’re looking to start from the VERY beginning, you should explore Mustache Rangers Classic over at NoisePicnic. There you will find cleaned and remastered versions of the earlier Mustache Rangers episodes.

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Live on the WCCO radio tonight

MR Central Command — Thu, 04 Nov 2010 18:31:30 +0000

The Mustache Rangers will be appearing on The Nite Show with TD Mischke this evening at 10pm Central. You can listen to it on 830 AM in the Twin Cities.

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The Mustache Rangers Learn From Books: Episode 174

MR Central Command — Mon, 01 Nov 2010 09:00:09 +0000

Words aren’t just for looking at. Sometimes, they mean something.

Bibliophiles beware of this week’s podcast episode.

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The Mustache Rangers Get Better: Episode 173

MR Central Command — Mon, 25 Oct 2010 09:00:29 +0000

Don’t eat food that you leave in your warm space ship for too long. That is all.

The Mustache Rangers deal with their minds in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy it all.

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The Mustache Rangers Get It Together: Episode 172

MR Central Command — Mon, 11 Oct 2010 09:00:22 +0000

They is a phrase in fashion that you may not be familiar with. It’s called “size.” All clothes may look the same, but they actually come in different “sizes.” Pants should be worn around the waist. If they have fallen to the ground, it is an issue with “size.” We just changed your life.

The Mustache Rangers dive into the world of high fashion in this week’s podcast episode. Wear it home.

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The Mustache Rangers Lock it Down: Episode 171

MR Central Command — Mon, 04 Oct 2010 09:00:15 +0000

You never want to appear too eager. That’s right. I’m talking to you, Mr(s). Eager. Put down that list of debatably exciting activities and take a load off. You deserve it. That’s the lie you can keep repeating to yourself. You deserve it.

The Mustache Rangers get the rust out in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy the parts of it you like best.

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The Mustache Rangers Aren’t Racist: Episode 170

MR Central Command — Mon, 27 Sep 2010 09:00:15 +0000

Even if you hate politics and think that for vote doesn’t matter and don’t agree with either party and live in a shack in the woods and have some sort of death pact with your common law wife and make moonshine from your own urine, can still be politically correct.

The Mustache Rangers deal with words in this week’s podcast full of comedy. Mix it with crushed ice and consume.

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The Mustache Rangers Have a Sit Down: Episode 169

MR Central Command — Mon, 20 Sep 2010 09:00:40 +0000

When you say “it takes all kinds” you actually mean “what a weirdo.” Say what you mean next time, instead of sugar coating like the apples you’ll soon be enjoying after the cool on the wax paper.

The Mustache Rangers deal with personal property in this week’s podcast. Enjoy how they do that.

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No time, no time

MR Central Command — Mon, 13 Sep 2010 13:53:04 +0000

There was no time to put this week’s Mustache Rangers podcast together, what with getting all those space shingles for the space roof and seeing Space Pavement at a space concert. Rest assured, there will be a new podcast up next week.

For alternate fun times, follow us on Twitter at @mustacherangers. Don’t read that out loud, because saying “at” and “at” will make you want to watch Star Wars. And it’s a Monday. That is time for work, not your Star Wars.

The post No time, no time appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Clown Around: Podcast Episode 168

MR Central Command — Mon, 06 Sep 2010 09:00:12 +0000

Is there anything in the world scarier than a clown? Yes. Does that make you feel any better? No.

The Mustache Rangers sift through this clown business in this podcast episode. Enjoy it alone.

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The Mustache Rangers Band Together: Episode 167

MR Central Command — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 09:00:20 +0000

Wishing someone a happy birthday is an odd thing to do, considering you’re not the one blowing out the candles.

The Mustache Rangers discuss band in this week’s podcast episode. Bring it to life through electricity.

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The Mustache Rangers See in 3D: Episode 166

MR Central Command — Mon, 23 Aug 2010 13:49:49 +0000

The 3D craze is upon us. A 3D piranha is no longer something to be feared. It is something to be embarrassed. Unless you are a cow. Cows and piranhas in 3D will never get along.

The Mustache Rangers discuss this craze in this week’s podcast episode of comedy. Listen to it in your underpants.

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The Mustache Rangers Learn French: Episode 165

MR Central Command — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 09:00:58 +0000

Most people say “learning another language is useless.” At least, that’s what this straw man tells us. We never should have wished him alive.

The Mustache Rangers learn to speak French in this week’s podcast episode. Try not to learn anything from it.

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Behind the Curtain

MR Central Command — Tue, 10 Aug 2010 13:57:24 +0000

Have you ever imagined yourself as a fly on the wall off a Mustache Rangers podcast recording session? We hope not, because you can’t believe how lightening fast our reflexes are. You would be smushed flat before you knew it.

But we do have the next best thing to being smushed flat. It’s a behind the scenes video of the recording process! So take a trip into the basement recording studio (computer room) and see how it’s done!

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The Mustache Rangers Enjoy Capitalism: Episode 164

MR Central Command — Mon, 09 Aug 2010 09:00:23 +0000

What’s not to enjoy about capitalism? The beginning of a sentence, a name, the possibilities are endless!

The Mustache Rangers explore economics in this week’s comedy podcast episode full of comedy. Enjoy it.

The post The Mustache Rangers Enjoy Capitalism: Episode 164 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

2010 Twin Cities Improv Festival Video

MR Central Command — Tue, 03 Aug 2010 13:52:30 +0000

Because you so kindly put up with the promotion of our first RiffTrax short (of which there are many digital copies still available for purchase), please enjoy a video of our performance at the 2010 Twin Cities Improv Festival.

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The Mustache Rangers Kick! Punch! It’s All in the Mind!: Episode 163

MR Central Command — Mon, 02 Aug 2010 10:00:57 +0000

Have you ever had a sudden realization blow your mind? Like that an inchworm is a freakin’ caterpillar and turns into a moth? Duh, of course! We’re so stupid!

This week’s comedy podcast episode involved a sudden realization. And by sudden, we mean slow.

The post The Mustache Rangers Kick! Punch! It’s All in the Mind!: Episode 163 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

RiffTrax iRiff from the Mustache Rangers

MR Central Command — Tue, 27 Jul 2010 14:09:20 +0000

The Mustache Rangers have recorded and produced their very first iRiff from RiffTrax. What is RiffTrax, you may ask. Why, it’s only the easiest way to get Mystery Science Theater 3000 style entertainment. Spoofing on films from the Twilight to Night of the Living Dead, the crew at RiffTrax takes making fun of movies to a whole new level.

And so, using their iRiffs publishing tools, the Mustache Rangers have created their very on RiffTrax. And the first film they take apart piece by piece is called Destination Earth. It’s a delicious bit of tripe from the petroleum industry that involves Martins discovering what makes Earth, and mainly the Unites States of America, so great.

Now, if you have 6 spare bits (75 cents), you can own a copy of the Mustache Rangers taking on Destination Earth. And if you still aren’t convinced, try the sample of the video below.

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The Mustache Rangers Play a Role: Episode 162

MR Central Command — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 09:00:23 +0000

We imagine there are a lot of nerds on internet. If there are a lot of nerds on internet, then this internet this is for them. And also not nerds. But, really, you’re only fooling yourself.

This week’s podcast is best experienced with some sort of sugary drink. Enjoy.

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New Podcast from Aric

MR Central Command — Wed, 21 Jul 2010 14:20:40 +0000

Just a quick note. Aric McKeown, who you know as First Lieutenant Rutuger G. Phooneybaum, is starting a new podcast tonight called My Dictionaric. It’s a live call-in show that streams at 9pm Central on Wednesdays. So if you are interested in more comedy from the minds of the Mustache Rangers, check out mydictionaric.com and call in during the show!

UPDATE:The sound (and everything, really) from last night’s streaming attempt failed horribly. But, I have since tested and fixed everything. So we’re doing this again tonight! Thursday. 9pm Central. Come, watch, call in!

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The Mustache Ranger Jump the Shark: Episode 161

MR Central Command — Mon, 19 Jul 2010 09:00:05 +0000

Some people think sharks are bad. These are all people. All people think sharks are bad. Some people are fooling themselves.

The Mustache Rangers deal with sharks in the least interesting way in this week’s comedy podcast episode. Enjoy it’s sound.

The post The Mustache Ranger Jump the Shark: Episode 161 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Mustache Rangers on the Witulant Internadio Smile Hour!

MR Central Command — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 14:20:00 +0000

The Mustache Rangers appeared as guests on the Witulant Internadio Smile Hour podcast last night. You should take a listen to it right here. It will be like getting two Mustache Rangers episodes in one week! Because, you know, there is a lot of bickering. And computer. Enjoy!

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The Mustache Rangers Are Inside The Ship: Episode 160

MR Central Command — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 09:00:11 +0000

Why are 150 episodes a landmark, but 160 episodes aren’t? Why do only quarters and halves of 100s matter? Who decided this? We bet it was the Greeks. Those guys are always causing trouble with their fat weddings and feta cheese.

This week’s podcast episode has nothing to do with Greece. Or does it? It doesn’t. Maybe.

The post The Mustache Rangers Are Inside The Ship: Episode 160 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Lay It Down: Episode 159

MR Central Command — Mon, 05 Jul 2010 09:00:52 +0000

What would we do without blue collars? We’d all have dress shirts like people from the 80s, and that would not be very cool of us.

The Mustache Rangers talk day laborers in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy if.

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The Mustache Rangers Calculate: Episode 158

MR Central Command — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 09:00:16 +0000

Math guides the universe. If someone says “I’d like to fly,” there universe will say “look at math” and they will know that they can not fly. Then the universe will go on, like, “birds have hollow bones and…” and you’re, like, “shut up, universe. I stopped caring about that two decades ago. You talk really slowly.”

The Mustache Rangers deal with math and books in this week’s podcast episode. Bring it into your brain.

The post The Mustache Rangers Calculate: Episode 158 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

4th Annual Twin Cities Improv Festival

MR Central Command — Wed, 23 Jun 2010 15:03:07 +0000

It’s that time of the year again. Time to turn your gazes to the Brave New Workshop. It’s time for the 4th Annual Twin Cities Improv Festival. Bringing improv groups from around the country and multi-show passes to the general vicinity of Hennepin and 26th.

June 24th at 7pm, the start date and time of the festival! June 28th at 8pm, the festival’s last show including a live performance by the Mustache Rangers. Laying claim to improv and the Uptown area, for the American way! This is the 4th Annual Twin Cities Improv Festival!

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The Mustache Rangers Talk Oil: Episode 157

MR Central Command — Mon, 21 Jun 2010 09:00:00 +0000

There has been a lot of talk about oil recently. Of course the Mustache Rangers want in on that action. Talking heads are paid pretty well, from what little we understand.

Listen and enjoy this week’s comedy podcast episode. It’ll put things right.

The post The Mustache Rangers Talk Oil: Episode 157 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Computer-pedia: Lineated Barbet

MR Central Command — Thu, 17 Jun 2010 18:40:42 +0000

The Lineated Barbet Magmahouse linen is a big ol’ bird that likes fruit. It’s a frugivore. No joke! It especially likes that stuff you get a the deli with marshmallows in it. But not the kind with grapes. It likes the ones with cherries.

This one time, a Lineated Barbet was at a party, and the tiger throwing the party was, like, “thanks for coming! Have some meat I killed,” and the Barbet was, like, “Naw, I just eat fruit.” That’s totally rude. Do not invite them to parties.

Nobody knows where they nest. They’re usually up all night going “woo!” And during the day, they’re taking up seats at coffee shops. Listen, birds. You can’t live at the coffee shop. Other people like to sit too.

Their feathers are bright red.

(Photo by Mike (NO captive birds) in Thailand)

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The Mustache Rangers Equip: Episode 156

MR Central Command — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 08:00:44 +0000

If there were a world championship for stalling, the Mustache Rangers would win it. Too bad there is only a universe wide championship for stalling. It’s called the Uni-N-Stall. Dark matter wins every space year.

There is another podcast episode for your ears this week. Put it in there.

The post The Mustache Rangers Equip: Episode 156 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

New to the Site?

MR Central Command — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 16:35:54 +0000

Hey there. Welcome to the Mustache Rangers website. If this is your first time here, then you might be overwhelmed by the large number of podcasts. Well, don’t fear! I’m here to help!

Why not check out a few of our favorite podcast episodes where the Mustache Rangers pretend to be truckers, are joined by a robot, decide on a vacation spot, and are joined by Kevin Murphy of Mystery Science Theater 3000.

If you like what you hear, why not subscribe on iTunes and tell all your friends about it? Why not?

The post New to the Site? appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Play the Game of Life: Episode 155

MR Central Command — Mon, 07 Jun 2010 08:00:42 +0000

If life is truly a game, then it is longer and more boring than Monopoly. Tell your sisters they should give up already, because you want to go to bed. It’s getting absurd. Honestly, everyone has 20 hotels on everything. Something is very wrong here.

The Mustache Rangers talk about numbers in this week’s podcast. Enjoy ip. Ip? Huh. We meant it. I mean, we mean it. It?

The post The Mustache Rangers Play the Game of Life: Episode 155 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Use the Yellow Pages: Episode 154

MR Central Command — Mon, 24 May 2010 08:00:58 +0000

Just a reminder, there are outtakes at the end of most Mustache Rangers episodes. This week’s episode has a particularly long one. Enjoy the podcast now!

The post The Mustache Rangers Use the Yellow Pages: Episode 154 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Are Crude: Episode 153

MR Central Command — Mon, 17 May 2010 08:00:15 +0000

The Mustache Rangers get pretty crude in this week’s podcast. So, you know, better put on your excitement-resistant pants.

The post The Mustache Rangers Are Crude: Episode 153 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Hate Kids: Episode 152

MR Central Command — Mon, 03 May 2010 08:00:27 +0000

Who doesn’t hate children? Even children hate children. Speaking of children, the Mustache Rangers get a call from Jack Harty of the famous Harty Boys in this week’s podcast. You may have heard about their success with the case of the limping platypus. You may not have too. You should have though. The Harty Boys are very noisy children.

The post The Mustache Rangers Hate Kids: Episode 152 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Come Up: Episode 151

MR Central Command — Mon, 26 Apr 2010 08:00:43 +0000

Sometimes, after a few cold ones, you might get to thinking that a stylish goatee would really compliment your mustache. That’s when you need to call the Mustache Rangers hotline at 612-234-3456 so we can get you some help, because that is crazy thinking.

There is a new podcast this week. Dial it up on your computer phone.

The post The Mustache Rangers Come Up: Episode 151 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Turn 150: Episode 150

MR Central Command — Mon, 19 Apr 2010 08:00:19 +0000

It may surprise you that there are 150 episodes of the Mustache Rangers podcast available for your listening pleasure. It may also surprise you that air is necessary for your survival. If both of these things surprise you, someone can probably claim you as a dependent on their tax forms.

The Mustache Rangers celebrate their 150th episode today with their 150th episode. It’s like a hand drawing the hand that is drawing it. Enjoy!

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The Mustache Rangers Steal: Episode 149

MR Central Command — Mon, 12 Apr 2010 08:00:17 +0000

The Mustache Rangers apologize for the lack of an episode last week. It’s easy to blame Computer, but it was totally the fault of Computer. We were all, like, “Record audio,” and Computer was all “Nawwww.”

The post The Mustache Rangers Steal: Episode 149 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers and the Beetrothed: Episode 148

MR Central Command — Mon, 29 Mar 2010 08:00:58 +0000

Just another podcast episode where the guys are floating around in their spaceshi….holy crap! They aren’t on the spaceship today? Well butter my bottom and call me Jessica Tandy’s friend Margret.

Enjoy this week’s podcast. We can’t make you. It is only a suggestion.

Sound FX attributes:
By Benboncan (http://www.freesound.org/usersViewSingle.php?id=634166)
By Tito Lahaye (http://www.freesound.org/usersViewSingle.php?id=453534)

The post The Mustache Rangers and the Beetrothed: Episode 148 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Computer-pedia: Old Vanderburgh County Courthouse

MR Central Command — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 16:15:44 +0000

Evansville, Indiana

" data-image-caption="" data-medium-file="http://mustacherangers.com/wp-content/uploads/old_corty.jpg" data-large-file="http://mustacherangers.com/wp-content/uploads/old_corty.jpg" loading="lazy" src="http://mustacherangers.com/wp-content/uploads/old_corty.jpg" alt="Old Vanderburgh County Courthouse" title="Old Vanderburgh County Courthouse" width="240" height="180" class="alignright size-full wp-image-556" />The Old Vanderburgh County Courthouse, often simply called “Old Courty Court,” is a place where old people used to go to talk about boring things but not anymore. It is now a home for vegetarian snakes. Do not be fooled. Vegetarian snakes still bite.

Originally located in Evansville, Indiana, the courthouse was moved to Greece in 3015. The Grecian government had ordered too many vegetarian snakes from Lord Darkness of the Rainbow Nebula for their Special Snake Olympics and they needed a place to store the snakes. Old Courty Court was the obvious choice.

After the courthouse was moved entirely by brown field mice, it was filled with sand and lettuce for the vegetarian snakes. The mice were invited to stay, as thanks for their hard work, but they were too bigoted against snakes to accept the offer and instead decided to drown themselves en masse in the KFC Sea(formerly the Aegean Sea).

The snakes that inhabit Old Courty Court never age, never breed, and never die. This is because the building was placed on a gypsy by the brown field mice. The snakes pray for death, but it never comes. Also, they are always hungry. Also, no one will install cable there because they are creeped out by immortal snakes for some reason.

All snakes ordered from Lord Darkness were thrown out of the Special Snake Olympics due to drug violations.

(Photo by jimmywayne)

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Phooneybaum Phoughts: Space-Time 0.29.AXE.333.p

MR Central Command — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 15:05:27 +0000

With all the advancements in technology, you think they would have improved on the shower. But no, sentient slave water is the best we can do.
You can try all the expensive waxes you like, but nothing beats star lard for styling your mustache.
This Andromedian Milfoil is getting out of control.
Universal healthcare is a joke. Why am I paying the medical costs for some bum in the Small Magellanic Cloud?
You may think being “King of Planet ____” if a big deal, but they’re little more than a bathroom attendant to the Mustache Rangers. Except we don’t tip kings.
Can’t sleep. Wish the Commander Major hadn’t stored his giant truck full of ventriloquist dummies in my room. And I wish that trunk were not bleeding and pulsating.

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The Mustache Rangers Run Away: Episode 147

MR Central Command — Mon, 22 Mar 2010 08:00:08 +0000

Sometime the best thing you can do with your problems is to run away from them. Do you believe that? You shouldn’t. You need to break the legs of your problems first, and then run away from them. Really? Modern science, people! You need to break the legs of your problems, destroy all of medical science, and then run away. Can you taste the freedom yet?

The Mustache Rangers have a podcast here for you to listen to. Listen to it.

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Important Letters from an Important Commander Major: Sandwich

MR Central Command — Fri, 19 Mar 2010 13:49:25 +0000

Dear Lucille,

Today was one of the more challenging days Iâ€d had in quite some time. It seemed like I was getting it from all sides. Nothing I said or did could make anything better to anyone. No one was happy with me. Especially Phooneybaum, and even more especially, Computer. And even more especially than that, the especialliest, was myself. How was I to know that Phooneybaum had special plans for dinner? And how was I to know that the sandwich I made was going to turn out to be way better than the meal of turnips au poive he fussed over for 3 hours. He made it as a surprise, but didnâ€t tell me so of course I was going to make a sandwich. When youâ€re hungry, youâ€re hungry. I shouldnâ€t be punished for being hungry, should I? Well, I guess I punish people for being hungry. But Iâ€m the Commander Major! Thatâ€s my job. My job is not to be punished for hunger. I donâ€t keep track of my hours of being punished for being hungry and expect to be paid for those hours. Thatâ€s ridiculous. And so is Phooneybaum. I changed my mind, I am not NOT happy with myself. I think I deserve another sandwich.

With some love,
THE Commander Major

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Guests on Drinking with Ian

MR Central Command — Thu, 18 Mar 2010 15:36:34 +0000

Now that this site is wide enough to display videos, we give you our interview and performance on Minnesota’s own talk show, Drinking with Ian. Enjoy!

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Computer-pedia: Horse

MR Central Command — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 14:28:24 +0000

The horse (animalus overratedus) is a thing with four legs and a head and a tail. It was invented in 5000 BCE by this guy that was real lonely and needed a friend. So he invented a horse, but he gave it too many legs and it ran away. He was real sad, so he made another horse but he put stripes on it so it would know it was his prisoner. That is how the zebra was invented. The zebra kicked him and killed him and then ran away.

Guys figured out how to climb trees in 4001 BCE, and by 4000 BCE they were jumping from trees on to horses. So the horses agreed not to be jerks anymore if people would stop jumping on them. The guys agreed, but kept jumping on horses. The jerk role had switched to guys instead of horses, and guymanity was on its way to greatness.

Guys eventually forgot how smart horses were, and started to use them mainly for jumping into pools from diving boards. One horse, named Clever Hans, knew how to do arithmetic. But when guys figured this out, the other horses were all like “dude, stop doing maths.” Then scientist guys said Hans was stupid and horses were free to get brushed and eat apples and sugar cubes.

Rocket horses eventually replaced the regular horse. Regular horses were made into rocket horse food.

Zebras are still on the lam.

(Photo by falcon1961)

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Phooneybaum Phoughts: Space-Time 1.34.52.00.0.2

MR Central Command — Tue, 16 Mar 2010 16:22:55 +0000

Like the homes of childhood friends, every modern day space ship has a different smell to it. Except for ours. Our smells normal and all the others smell weird. What are their moms cooking?
Found a cape on the kitchen floor this morning. Feel the Commander Major wants to be found out and confronted about his obsession, but not ready to have that conversation.
Had that dream about pigeons pecking out my eyes again, except that my eyes were trumpets and the pigeons were Dizzy Gillespie. I think I’m sexually frustrated.
Nothing worse than a pie in the laundry dryer. Cleaning the lint trap is hell.
Sometimes I get lonely, but I feel better by realizing that everything everywhere is lonely. Especially trees that aren’t in a forest with their buddies.
It gets confusing when I say “I’m going for a Space Wok.” Space Wok, please change the name of your establishment.

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The Mustache Rangers Pool: Episode 146

MR Central Command — Mon, 15 Mar 2010 08:00:42 +0000

Does anyone else skip 45 seconds into the Mustache Rangers podcast whenever they listen to it? Because we certainly do.

The Mustache Rangers argue a bit in this week’s podcast episode. That is certainly a shock to you, is it not? Enjoy!

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New Design, New Developments

MR Central Command — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 20:11:53 +0000

Welcome to the freshly redesigned Mustache Rangers website. Seriously. Welcome. Look in our eyes! Welcome! We mean it.

There are a few reasons for this reason. The first the lack of regular blog content. Sure, the podcast updates every Monday. But every post that came after that would push the current podcast episode down the page. Not any more! Expect more non-podcast fun on the site.

The second is space. As you can see, the site is much wider now. Just the right size for…video? That’s right. The Mustache Rangers and some local film makers are working on bringing the Mustache Rangers to the future of eye-looking-at media. We’ll keep you posted on developments as they come.

Third, it looks pretty awesome. Doesn’t it? It’s like we moved from the 1920s to the 1940s. Futuristic!

Fourthly, functionality. For example, look! There is a working archives page where you can listen to any past podcast! And in the upper right hand corner of the site? A search field that works! What did you do to deserve all of this?

And lastly, we’re dropping a bit of the facade. Sure, it was fun to pretend that we were actually the Mustache Rangers. But it’s awfully hard to promote yourself and your work when you’re being coy. So, the new ABOUT page will give some real information on who we are and what we do.

So yell it from the mountains. The Mustache Rangers are better than ever! Probably!

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Phooneyboom: Podcast Episode 145

MR Central Command — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 08:00:54 +0000

The Mustache Rangers know you better than you know yourself. For example, you hate sweet pickles and black licorice. And if you do say you like those things, you are not only fooling yourself but those around you as well. For shame.

The Mustache Rangers say a few things in this week’s podcast episode. Drink it in.

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The Mustache Rangers Ship: Episode 144

MR Central Command — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 09:00:08 +0000

It’s another adventure. What do you want from us?

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Truck: Podcast Episode 143

MR Central Command — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 09:00:53 +0000

The open road calls to many a young fool. The old fools do not exist because they exist as young dead fools rolled into a ditch by some murderous stranger. Stay in your basements, friends. It is the safest. Except for all the things in your basement that could kill you.

The Mustache Rangers imagine life on the open road in this podcast episode. Enjoy it as a podcast.

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The Mustache Rangers Write a Zine: Episode 142

MR Central Command — Mon, 15 Feb 2010 09:00:51 +0000

Some people think the future will be free of paper. The truth is, there will be more paper than you can image.

For example, try imagining some paper. Are you doing it? Okay, it’s more than that. I know, right?

The Mustache Rangers deal with a zine in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy it in your sleep.

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Distracted: Podcast Episode 141

MR Central Command — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 12:01:04 +0000

Sometimes, the Mustache Rangers podcast is…hey! What’s that?

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The Mustache Rangers Are Audited: Episode 140

MR Central Command — Mon, 01 Feb 2010 09:00:57 +0000

Monies make the world and universe a very complex place to live. If atoms didn’t make up money, they would have no idea what to make of money. I think that was perfectly clear. Don’t ask any questions about that sentence please.

The Mustache Rangers have money issues in this week’s podcast adventure. Consume it whole.

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Tie: Podcast Episode 139

MR Central Command — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 09:00:28 +0000

All problems can be solved by talking about them. The winner talks the loudest and occasionally waves their hands. Use this trick in your next job negotiation. You will be respected.

The Mustache Rangers try and solve problems in this podcast episode. See if they succeed!

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Ima Computer

MR Central Command — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 15:06:21 +0000

In general, it is a terrible idea to change computers. This is because you need to move a lot of bits. And sometimes these bits do not feel like moving.

This week’s podcast is set for consumption, but with no current way to bring it to the internet. This will be fixed for next week. We apologize for the lack of joy we are bringing to you. Hopefully this will be the last of it.

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The Mustache Rangers and the Fountain of Youth: Episode 138

MR Central Command — Mon, 04 Jan 2010 09:00:30 +0000

They say youth is wasted on the young, but oldness is wasted on the old. An excuse not to remember people’s names would come in very handy.

The Mustache Rangers for a direction for their life in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy it by listening to it.

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The Mustache Rangers Have a Hotline: Episode 137

MR Central Command — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 09:00:08 +0000

Sometimes, it is not easy to decide what to do. Choices are telling, and making a choice tells your enemies something about you. If you really must make a choice, agree on a code that you and the recipient of your code can use. Only use this code once. Your enemies are crafty.

There may be distress in this week’s podcast episode of the Mustache Rangers. Try not to worry about it.

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The Mustache Rangers Give Gifts: Episode 136

MR Central Command — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 09:00:06 +0000

Mustache Rangers Central Command would like to wish you and your acquaintances a hairy Terrance Day. The traditions of Terrance Day continues in this week’s podcast episode, but you can listen to the freshly cleaned Terrance Day origin podcast as well!

So gather the children around your computer or iPod, cover their ears, and listen away!

The post The Mustache Rangers Give Gifts: Episode 136 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Get Down With the Sickness: Episode 135

MR Central Command — Mon, 14 Dec 2009 09:00:01 +0000

Winter has arrived in space, and along with the chilly winter space breeze comes the flu. Just the regular flu. Space flu is something different all together. It is something transmitted when you ear kiss.

This week’s Mustache Rangers involves sickness. Maybe. It doesn’t matter. Listen to it.

The post The Mustache Rangers Get Down With the Sickness: Episode 135 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Holiday Apologies

MR Central Command — Mon, 07 Dec 2009 14:42:18 +0000

The holidays have really given the Mustache Rangers podcast schedule a beating. The podcast will return next week. Please accept our space apologies.

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The Mustache Rangers Write: Episode 134

MR Central Command — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 09:00:59 +0000

Hollywood has run out of ideas. This is the truth with the temperature of a cold stone. So where does one go when the fountain ideas has run dry? Space. Leprechauns do it. People named Jason do it. Anything can do it, really. Here is an example. When someone wanted to make Lord of the Rings is space, they made Wing Commander.

This week the Mustache Rangers try their hand at writing the next big thing. Listen to the podcast while surrounded by your equals.

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The Mustache Rangers Meet: Episode 133

MR Central Command — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 09:00:59 +0000

It may seem like last week just ended, but it is time for a new one. Butter up those “new week” smiles with a healthy helping of the Mustache Rangers podcast. It’ll help Thanksgiving go down easier.

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Search For Treasure With Superego: Podcast Episode 132

MR Central Command — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 09:00:07 +0000

The Mustache Rangers are joined this week by Dr. Jeremy Carter, PhD and Dr. Matt Gourley, PyT of the Superego podcast. If you don’t go to GoSuperego.com and listen to their excellent work, you’re more than a fool. You’re a dirty fool. A fool who has, somehow, become dirty. How did you become so dirty, fool? We do not care, because everything that comes out of your mouth is nonsense and tainted by your filthy exterior.

You can find a list of all of our special guests right here.

The post Search For Treasure With Superego: Podcast Episode 132 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Hold Hands: Episode 131

MR Central Command — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 09:00:06 +0000

Human contact can be overrated and underrated. Sure, hugging is great. But punches aren’t. And those are almost the same thing. It is okay to be confused by this. You might want to read a book on the topic.

The Mustache Rangers hold hands in this week’s episode. Enjoy it alone.

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The Mustache Rangers Have a Session: Episode 130

MR Central Command — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 09:00:33 +0000

Imagine the Mustache Rangers are using their socks as puppets while recording this week’s podcast episode, because that is how it happened. It is not an excuse, because there is nothing needing an excuse. It’s just a little treat for your brain. Enjoy.

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The Mustache Rangers Cut and Run: Episode 129

MR Central Command — Mon, 19 Oct 2009 09:00:26 +0000

Most ulcers are caused by other people. Unless you live in a shack in the woods. Then your ulcer is caused by wind and wolves. You should have that looked at.

The Mustache Rangers deal with society in this week’s podcast episode. Share your friends with it.

The post The Mustache Rangers Cut and Run: Episode 129 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Live on Video

MR Central Command — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 17:31:58 +0000

It has come to our attention that some people have never seen the Mustache Rangers perform live. And so, here you are. A live performance to show what you are missing. Feel free to share it with all of your friends. And keep an eye on the live performance page for upcoming Mustache Rangers performances.

The Mustache Rangers: Live at Improv at Go-Go from Aric McKeown on Vimeo.

The post The Mustache Rangers Live on Video appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Advise: Episode 128

MR Central Command — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 09:00:20 +0000

Everyone is stupid sometimes and can’t make a decision on their own. They need someone to help. Someone to share the blame if things don’t go according to plan. Newspaper columnists have had a pretty good monopoly on this market for some time. But it is not time for the podcast market to take over.

The Mustache Rangers give out advice on this week’s podcast episode. Try listening to it while not browsing the internet, you ADD monkey.

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The Mustache Rangers Refresh: Episode 127

MR Central Command — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 09:00:53 +0000

People would like to tell you that soap can refresh you, but they are wrong. Do not pay them any attention. You should be washing yourselves in sugary drinks. Your skin will thank you.

This week, the Mustache Rangers instruct you on the art of refreshment. Listen to the podcast with both ears at the same time.

And leave comments and questions on the Mustache Rangers Hotline at 612-234-2456.

The post The Mustache Rangers Refresh: Episode 127 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Drinking with Ian

MR Central Command — Wed, 30 Sep 2009 15:00:06 +0000

The Mustache Rangers will be interviewed and perform on the taping of Drinking with Ian this Friday at First Ave. in downtown Minneapolis at 8pm. You should come! There will be drinking!

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The Mustache Rangers Talk Sports: Episode 126

MR Central Command — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 09:00:55 +0000

The American has always loved sports, be it shooting Redcoats or hoops. And what happens when the American runs out of sports? The crafty American makes new sports. Arena football is truly American as apple pie, which actually is not American in the least. What we are trying to say is, there are a lot of sports going on all the time.

This week, the Mustache Rangers explore the topic of sports in their podcast. Don’t fumble this episode, or else people on internet will make fun of you and your butter fingers.

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The Mustache Rangers Pet: Episode 125

MR Central Command — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 09:00:21 +0000

Space can get lonely, even if you have a traveling companion floating along next to you. Don’t be afraid to discuss your loneliness with companion, as a long and boring discussion about your needs will surely shoo away any loneliness you might be feeling. In fact, after your companion’s short and spurned responses, you may even desire loneliness.

The Mustache Rangers discuss containers in this week’s podcast event. Enjoy it without socks shoved in your ears.

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The Mustache Rangers Chairy Pick: Episode 124

MR Central Command — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 09:00:45 +0000

It is not uncommon for someone to grow bored with their surroundings. If they are not terribly meek, then they may explore things beyond their comfort zone. And this is how people came to eat tabouli.

The Mustache Rangers get a bit outside of their comfort zone in this week’s podcast adventure. Listen to it with all your might.

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Finish a Story: Podcast Episode 123

MR Central Command — Mon, 07 Sep 2009 09:00:25 +0000

It is a long held belief that model rockets are cool. The fact is, they are not cool in the slightest. No matter how “rad” or “sweet” the decals stuck on the rocket are. The rocket will, in the very best situation, go up and then go down. So unless you’re building a rocket that does away with the “then go down” part, find yourself a new hobby. Button collecting is always popular.

The Mustache Rangers deal with buttons in this podcast episode. Take it into your brain.

The post Finish a Story: Podcast Episode 123 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Answer to Someone: Episode 122

MR Central Command — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 09:00:42 +0000

As you know by now, the Mustache Rangers stopped by the CONvergence Sci-Fi and Fantasy convention to bring stories of their conquests to the little people. In this week’s podcast episode, they take questions directly from the audience. Will these questions make for interesting listening? Only listening will tell!

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The Mustache Rangers and the Moon Base: Episode 121

MR Central Command — Mon, 24 Aug 2009 09:00:57 +0000

The easiest way is rarely the most fulfilling way to do something. But it is the easiest way to do things. The eternal struggle between laziness and enjoyment is eternal for a reason. Because people are too lazy to solve the issue.

The Mustache Rangers deal with problems in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy it, if you are not too lazy.

The post The Mustache Rangers and the Moon Base: Episode 121 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Read Reviews: Podcast Episode 120

MR Central Command — Mon, 17 Aug 2009 09:00:53 +0000

The on line can be a place of confusion. Anyone can say anything, if they have purchased a government licensed SAnything Pass. And, really, who has the money to pay to say anything? The SSomething Intelligent Pass is much cheaper, but also labels you as a smarty pants. No one will date the SSomething’ers.

This podcast deals with the issue of the on line reviews. Enjoy it on or off, but be careful what you say about it on the on line afterwards. They are watching and counting you.

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The Mustache Rangers at CONvergence: Episode 119

MR Central Command — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 09:00:41 +0000

The Mustache Rangers performed live for the riveted crowd at this year’s CONvergence. And now, you can be riveted too. Enjoy the longest Mustache Rangers podcast yet.

The post The Mustache Rangers at CONvergence: Episode 119 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Track Back: Episode 118

MR Central Command — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 09:00:41 +0000

Is there anything more annoying than having to go over the same ground you have already gone over? Yes, there is. But back tracking is definitely pretty annoying. Just because it isn’t the most annoying thing ever doesn’t mean it is a delight to you and others. So go ahead. Complain about it as much as you like. Unless someone is complaining about something more annoying.

The Mustache Rangers deal with annoying things in this week’s podcast episode. Listen to it well.

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The Mustache Rangers Plan It: Episode 117

MR Central Command — Mon, 27 Jul 2009 09:00:38 +0000

When you are asked to view a police line up, always make to finger the wrong perp. If the person who wronged you is sent to prison, there is no way to leave flaming bags on their doorsteps or send them mysterious letters with pictures of their house inside. Jail is no fun for anybody.

The Mustache Rangers argue about a plan on the podcast the week. Enjoy it as you would any other argument.

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The Mustache Rangers Shave: Episode 116

MR Central Command — Mon, 20 Jul 2009 09:00:57 +0000

If something makes you hungrier than the pursuit of justice, then you need to check the order of your “pursuit list.” If you have it in some sort of computerized spreadsheet, it should be fairly easy to edit.

The Mustache Rangers deal with the ordeal that is shaving in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy and learn, at the same time, please.

The post The Mustache Rangers Shave: Episode 116 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Find Time for Time: Episode 115

MR Central Command — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 08:00:03 +0000

Time is a big bully who steals everything. There isn’t one thing you can name that he or she will not take for itself. After you make peace with that, he or she is really cool to hang out with and can tell you some wild stories.

The Mustache Rangers have not made peace with time in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy that you are better than them.

The post The Mustache Rangers Find Time for Time: Episode 115 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Breathe In: Episode 114

MR Central Command — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 09:00:21 +0000

There are a lot of smells in the world. And if you combine two smells, you get a new smell. So it would be very practical of you to say there are an infinite number of smells in the world. Because who wants to count that high?

The Mustache Rangers deal with a few smells in this week’s podcast adventure. Enjoy it with your loved ones. And if you love only yourself, you’re still good to go.

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Are Dead Question Mark With Kevin Murphy: Podcast Episode 113

MR Central Command — Mon, 29 Jun 2009 09:00:44 +0000

The Mustache Rangers are joined by another special guest this week. Who may that guest be? Or is it “whom?” Whatever the word, the guest doesn’t change.

Kevin Murphy, of Mystery Science Theater 3000 fame, joins the Mustache Rangers on another absurd and introspective podcast. You can find Kevin Murphy’s most recent work at the fantastic RiffTrax.com.

So enjoy the Mustache Rangers, and enjoy Kevin Murphy, and then enjoy RiffTrax.com. It’s the only decent thing for you to do.

The post Are Dead Question Mark With Kevin Murphy: Podcast Episode 113 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Twin Cities Improv Festival 3 is Here!

MR Central Command — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 21:22:45 +0000

It’s that time of the year again. Time to turn your eyes towards the Brave New Workshop. It’s time for the third annual Twin Cities Improv Festival.

That is correct. The Twin Cities Improv Festival starts this evening and runs through Sunday, June 28th (when the Mustache Rangers perform live for your enjoyment).

So cancel your plans, or make the plans you never had, and make your way to the Twin Cities Improv Festival.

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The Mustache Rangers Burp: Episode 112

MR Central Command — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 09:00:50 +0000

It is a little known fact that everybody burps. If you have never heard someone burp, chances are they actually disguised it as talking. Listen closely the next time you have a conversation with this non-burper, and call them out loudly if you suspect one of their words is fulled by a burp. That will show them the proper amount of shame.

The Mustache Rangers deal with issues in this week’s podcast episode. Listen to their issues, to delay your own.

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Improv, iTunes, and the Wiki

MR Central Command — Fri, 19 Jun 2009 20:15:55 +0000

Announcement number one! The Mustache Rangers will be performing at the Twin Cities Improv Festival on June 28th. Check out the website for tickets and information on the plethora of other improv artists performing at the festival.

Announcement number two! It isn’t really an announcement. We just wanted to bug you some more about rating the Mustache Rangers podcast on iTunes. So why aren’t you doing that already? Are you scared? Do you not have two minutes? If you didn’t have two minutes, you wouldn’t even be here. So go there.

Announcement number three! There is now a Mustache Rangers Wiki where you can find and add information about the Mustache Rangers and their adventures. Take care of the Wiki and it will take care of you.

Announcement number four! We love you. As a friend.

That is all.

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The Mustache Rangers Correct: Episode 111

MR Central Command — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 09:00:17 +0000

The spine is a mystery. It isn’t, really. But it can certainly be a sticky wicket at times. It is inside the body, which is the first problem. Fixing the spine isn’t like getting an eyelash out of your eye. There are few advantages to having an exoskeleton, but easy spine fixing seems like one of them. Easy spine chewability seems to cancel out that advantage.

The Mustache Rangers deal with the human spine in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy it at your own risk. Risk of enjoyment.

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The Mustache Rangers Deal With Ricky: Episode 110

MR Central Command — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 09:00:04 +0000

It’s that time of the week again. Time for another guest on the Mustache Rangers podcast. This week, solo musician and member of the The Glad Version, Adam Svec lends his leading vocals to the Mustache Rangers. What will our boys do with his golden cords? You’ll have to listen and find out.

And make sure to check out videos of Adam’s work here and here. That is an order! Of sorts.

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The Mustache Rangers Skip: Episode 109

MR Central Command — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 09:00:48 +0000

Many people look back on their childhood with tinted memories. The truth is, you were probably a really stupid child. Most people are, except for the freakishly smart ones. And they have to deal with the fact that they were always being judged by you, the stupid children. To sum things up, childhood is a hell on earth and you should take every opportunity to take a child’s money because they will only spend it on something stupid.

The Mustache Rangers debate a childhood topic in this week’s podcast it. Enjoy it and try not to remember your own childhood. It’s for the best.

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The Mustache Rangers Could Not Try Harder: Episode 108

MR Central Command — Mon, 25 May 2009 09:00:22 +0000

It is a special day for the Mustache Rangers podcast, because we have the first of many special guests contributing their golden vocal chords for our use. And we are not stealing their vocal chords like in the Little Mermaid. We do not have the technology. Yet.

The first very special guest is Cayenne Chris Conroy of the Teknikal Diffikulties podcast. After you have given this week’s Mustache Rangers episode a listen, make sure to visit Teknikal Diffikulties and enjoy over 50 hours of audiosketch comedy.

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The Mustache Rangers Sow: Episode 107

MR Central Command — Mon, 18 May 2009 08:00:11 +0000

Sowing and sewing can be confusing to school children. This is odd, considering that they are doing both almost constantly. The only solution is flashcards. Remember to look up the definitions in the dictionary before you make the flashcards for them, so that you are not passing on incorrect information.

The Mustache Rangers have another podcast adventure this week. Try your hardest to enjoy it.

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The Mustache Rangers Get Judged: Episode 106

MR Central Command — Mon, 11 May 2009 08:00:11 +0000

It is difficult to judge anything or anyone without being hypocritical. It is best to say “now I know I’m no saint” before passing judgment, before people can accuse you of not being a saint. You are taking away their power.

The Mustache Rangers cover many topics in this week’s podcast. Enjoy it with our full compliments.

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The Mustache Rangers Are Quiet: Episode 105

MR Central Command — Mon, 04 May 2009 08:00:33 +0000

There is a secret to being quiet. It’s called shutting your yapper. Also, you might want to turn off Twitter.

This week’s episode of the Mustache Rangers gives you no tips on anything. Enjoy that.

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The Mustache Rangers Smile: Episode 104

MR Central Command — Mon, 27 Apr 2009 08:00:39 +0000

It is spring time in space, and that means allergy time. Not many people know the nebula are actually black hole sneezes. Space pollen is a hell of a thing.

The Mustache Rangers smile in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy it and share it with friends.

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The Mustache Rangers Train: Episode 103

MR Central Command — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 08:00:49 +0000

Training is important. But more important than training is instinct. In your next job interview, inform the interviewer that you, the interviewee, have the instinct needed for the job. If they start to question your statement, either run away or fight them. You will not get the job if you run away.

This week’s episode of the Mustache Rangers contains audio. Listen and enjoy.

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Chicago Improv Festival

MR Central Command — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 18:58:49 +0000

The Mustache Rangers will be performing in Chicago this Saturday as part of the Chicago Improv Festival. We understand that this means most fans will be unable to attend the performance

But we also understand that this means some fans in the Chicago area WILL be able to attend. So here are your details!

The Mustache Rangers will be performing at the Annoyance Theater on Saturday, April 18th at midnight. For those of you who this confuses, just pretend the show starts at 11:59pm on April 18th. Now you aren’t confused.

Tickets are $10, and the Mustache Rangers would be overjoyed to see you there.

And if not you, then your friend that live in Chicago. You know, the friends that you are going to tell to see the Mustache Rangers. They’re almost as good as you. But we won’t tell them that.

The post Chicago Improv Festival appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Wing It: Episode 102

MR Central Command — Mon, 13 Apr 2009 08:00:48 +0000

Who decides if something is a metaphor? English teachers. If it were not for them, you wouldn’t need to know how to pretend to see something in nothing.

Does this week’s episode of the Mustache Rangers contain a metaphor? You had better ask Mr. Philips. You know, your high school English teacher. Enjoy!

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A Mustache Rangers Live Performance and Free T-Shirts

MR Central Command — Fri, 10 Apr 2009 14:37:20 +0000

The Mustache Rangers will performing LIVE this coming Monday, April 13th at the Bryant-Lake Bowl as guests of the fantastic Splendid Things improv group. It promises to be a fantastic and exciting show for all to see.

But if the promise of fantasticism isn’t enough for you, then maybe a raffle of the few remaining Doc Johnson’s Olde Tyme Elixir t-shirts will peak your interest. That’s right, the last pristine Mustache Rangers t-shirts in existence will be raffled off at the Monday night Splendid Things improv show. Now you certainly have enough reasons to come.

You should also buy your tickets RIGHT NOW! Advance tickets are only $6 if you buy them at the following address before Sunday (4/12) at 11:59PM: http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/58996.

You can also call the Bryant-Lake Bowl box office at 612-825-8949 for advance tickets.

Day-of tickets are $10. That’s almost (exactly) $4 dollars more for being lazy. Don’t be lazy!

Doors open at 7PM. The show starts at 8PM. Drinks and dinner are available in the theater before and during the show.

So come, laugh, and get ready to possibly win a t-shirt! Even if you lose, you win! With entertainment!

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The Mustache Rangers Party: Episode 101

MR Central Command — Mon, 06 Apr 2009 08:36:22 +0000

After 100 perfect and unarguably consistent episodes, it is time for the Mustache Rangers to let loose and party! Join them for this week’s 101st perfect podcast. And do not forget the items you need to make a party grand. Like frilly toothpicks and conversation.

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The Mustache Rangers Turn 100: Episode 100

MR Central Command — Mon, 30 Mar 2009 08:00:44 +0000

It is finally here! Over two years of podcast production have brought us to episode 100 of the Mustache Rangers.

This is a special double length episode that was recorded live at the Mix Tape Comedy show held at the ComedySportz theater in Minneapolis, Minnesota.

Be prepared, because you will not be laughing alone. It will be like you’re in the audience of laughers! Except you are blind. And you can’t smell the fellow next to you. Also, you didn’t pay to get in. And you’re probably naked.

Thank you for your support of the Mustache Rangers. Please spread the podcasts around and let us look forward to the next 100 podcasts.

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The Mustache Rangers Make Art: Episode 99

MR Central Command — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 08:00:52 +0000

Many things are in the eye of the beholder. Like that eyelash that is turning the eye slowly red and swollen. And that guy has the nerve to comment critically about your hair cut? Maybe he should get that stupid eyelash out of his eye. What a big jerk.

The Mustache Rangers take on the critics this week with their ever present podcast. Enjoy it multiple times.

The post The Mustache Rangers Make Art: Episode 99 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Dull Fins: Episode 98

MR Central Command — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 08:00:35 +0000

The general population tends to forget that humans are animals. The general population also tends to complain about climbing stairs. It is with these two facts that we assume the general population is dim. We are sorry, but it is proven.

The Mustache Rangers see life in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy it by yourself.

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The Mustache Rangers Box: Episode 97

MR Central Command — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 08:00:13 +0000

Pugilism is a hobby you must consider the hidden costs of before partaking in. For example, those bandages are not free gifts. And water sponges to not buy themselves. You have been warned.

The Mustache Rangers present another podcast to you this week. It has been brought on to you.

The post The Mustache Rangers Box: Episode 97 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Where to Find the Mustache Rangers

MR Central Command — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 15:00:44 +0000

The Mustache Rangers are having a very big year, and want to make certain you are connected to all the bigness that is going on. This here is a handy guide to keep you updated.

The Mustache Rangers have a mountain full of live performances coming up this year, and there are many places you can find out about it. One option is to look towards the right sidebar of this very website. There you will find a Google Calendar that lists all of the upcoming Mustache Rangers shows. You can even use it to add reminders to your own Google Calendar. It is futuristic and beautiful.

The second option is to click on the live link at the top of the Mustache Rangers website. There you will find another list, but not as futuristic and debatably less beautiful.

Finally, if you are a Facebook user, you can sign up for the The Mustache Rangers Appreciation Society. Here you can interact with other Mustache Rangers fans, and get updated whenever a Mustache Rangers performance is coming up.

You see? There is really no excuse for you to be ill informed. If you are ill informed, you have only your own obstinance to blame.

So get informed, drop us a line, and tell some of your friends about the Mustache Rangers. We are happiest when you are happy, if it makes us happy. If your happiness is unrelated to our happiness, then we don’t see why we should have to go around smiling. It is exhausting.

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Phooneybaum Phoughts: Space Date 21.27.47.27

MR Central Command — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 15:47:56 +0000

Don’t know why I bothered learning to play the piano after they went extinct. This teaching cassette is almost worthless.
I have switched to decaf, but eating this non-caffeinated toast feels so pointless now.
My underpants have been bunching for the last few years, but I dare not adjust my self for fear of humiliations and fun makings.
It isn’t easy being aggressively passive.
Space laundry always gets put off until you’re out of space socks.
Quantifying how hungry a wolf is isn’t easy.

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The Mustache Rangers Talk Quiche: Episode 96

MR Central Command — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 08:00:57 +0000

To make an omelet, you have to break some eggs. This phrase only helps those who are concerned with the maintenance of shells. At least, that is the only conclusion we can come up with. Why else would someone be concerned about the breaking of eggs? Aside from chickens, but they aren’t eating any omelets anyways.

That being said, there is a new egg related Mustache Rangers podcast this week. Enjoy it with or without eggs.

The post The Mustache Rangers Talk Quiche: Episode 96 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers 100th Episode Extravaganza

MR Central Command — Tue, 24 Feb 2009 15:27:49 +0000

The Mustache Rangers are gearing up for their 100th podcast episode! In fact, the episode will be recorded LIVE in front of an audience this Friday! Would you like to be part of Mustache Rangers history? Well, it’s easy! Come to the show and have your laugh recorded forever.

We would like to fill the audience as full as possible, and Mix Tape Comedy has created a special offer for all Mustache Rangers fans. Just mention the Mustache Rangers Special and you will get 2 tickets for $10 instead of the standard 1 ticket for $10 price. Bring your friend. Bring your family. Bring the cute guy waiting in line to get into the Independent. But whatever you do, don’t stay home.

Here are the details:

What: Mix Tape Comedy
Where: Comedy Sportz Theater
When: February 27th, 2009 at 10:30 PM
Price: 2 tickets for $10 if you mention the Mustache Rangers Special!
Reservations: Encouraged! Call 612-870-1230

Need we say you get to see two other fantastic improv groups perform? It’s true! HUGE Theater and Boytron, both fantastically awesome, will be performing as well.

So let’s go over this again. You get to be part of Mustache Rangers history, you get to see three amazing improv groups, and you get a special discounted ticket rate. What is stopping you? Nothing. That’s what. Make those reservations, citizens and cadets. See you there!

The post The Mustache Rangers 100th Episode Extravaganza appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Get the Royal Treatment: Episode 95

MR Central Command — Mon, 23 Feb 2009 09:00:40 +0000

The Mustache Rangers are fast approaching their 100th podcast episode, which will be recorded in front of a live audience this Friday. If you would like to connect rings of colored construction paper together to count down that days until episode 100, that would be an okay way to celebrate.

Other ways you can celebrate are by listening to this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy!

The post The Mustache Rangers Get the Royal Treatment: Episode 95 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Mustache Rangers Episode 100 Announcement

MR Central Command — Mon, 16 Feb 2009 09:00:44 +0000

The Mustache Rangers will be recording episode 100 of their podcast in front of a live audience! This very special event will take place on February 27th, 2009 at the Mix Tape Comedy show being held at the Minneapolis ComedySportz! You should absolutely come down and be part of the experience!

What: Mix Tape Comedy
Where: Comedy Sportz Theater
When: February 20th and 27th, 2009 at 10:30 PM
Price: $10

The Mustache Rangers will also performing live on February 20th at Mix Tape Comedy. You should come to that performance as well. It’ll be special in its own way, because you will be there. Right?

The post Mustache Rangers Episode 100 Announcement appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Live This Friday

MR Central Command — Wed, 11 Feb 2009 15:14:14 +0000

The Mustache Rangers are visiting Earth this Friday to perform live for willing and grateful audiences. The Commander Major and First Lieutenant will reenact tales from their space adventures on the spot. Come and see these heroes out of their element but in another one of their elements.

What: Mix Tape Comedy
Where: Comedy Sportz Theater
When: February 13th, 2009 at 10:30 PM
Price: $10

The show also includes performances from three other talented improv groups. So come and enjoy laughter with other human beings on Friday the 13th, before you spend the next day alone.

(The next day is Valentine’s Day, if you were not sure. We are implying that you are lonely. It is a biting joke between friends. Enjoy that.)

The post The Mustache Rangers Live This Friday appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Clip It: Episode 94

MR Central Command — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 10:00:25 +0000

Enjoy this week’s new Mustache Rangers episode about freshness, and stay tuned for new on the Mustache Rangers performing live this week.

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The Mustache Rangers Exchange Fluids: Episode 93

MR Central Command — Mon, 02 Feb 2009 09:00:12 +0000

It has come to our attention that there is little attention paid to the written word. The ears are the doors to the future of information gathering. Make sure to swab daily.

The Mustache Rangers argue in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy it today.

The post The Mustache Rangers Exchange Fluids: Episode 93 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Care For Children: Episode 92

MR Central Command — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 09:00:43 +0000

The Mustache Ranges grow tired of your need for the written word. Does a piece of audio really need to be accompanied by unrelated words?

In this week’s free comedy podcast, the Mustache Rangers talk about an assortments of things. Enjoy.

The post The Mustache Rangers Care For Children: Episode 92 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Sell: Episode 91

MR Central Command — Mon, 19 Jan 2009 09:00:51 +0000

We know your kind. You are the kind of person who owns a mirror they purchased at a garage sale. Not only that, you have yet to take the price tag off the four year old purchase. Why do you continue holding true to an item that screams your laziness to anyone willing to listen?

In case you need another mirror, the Mustache Rangers hold a garage sale in this week’s fantastic episode. Enjoyt. That is “enjoy it” but mushed together and missing an “i.” Isn’t that better?

The post The Mustache Rangers Sell: Episode 91 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Succeed: Episode 90

MR Central Command — Mon, 12 Jan 2009 08:00:00 +0000

Success is nice to see, on occasion. It would be nice to see Tom catch Jerry it some point. And Heckle and Jeckle would have been thrilled to get some corn. Sometimes, seeing people or animated things happy hits your heart just right.

In today’s podcast adventure, the Mustache Rangers find moderate success. Hopefully, it will bring about the smiles your lips have been missing.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 89

MR Central Command — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 09:00:48 +0000

It has come to our attention, via our own observation, that this area provides little to no information about the podcast episode for which it is attached. Let us see if that can not be remedied.

This week’s episode is a free comedy podcast. Please note that “comedy” is not in quotes. Except for that one. But the one before it was not.

So, please, enjoy and share the comedy with other people who do not displease you. Our thanks. And enjoy!

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 88

MR Central Command — Mon, 29 Dec 2008 09:00:07 +0000

We hope that your Terrance Day went well, and that you have purchased the correct amount of calendars for the coming year. We also hope you dream of things that aren’t monsters, because those things are scary and are a bad omen for the coming year. Science has proved it.

The Mustache Rangers smell things in this week’s podcast adventure. Enjoy it much.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 88 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers: Episode 87

MR Central Command — Mon, 22 Dec 2008 09:00:13 +0000

The Mustache Rangers are back in action, with the help of their helpful fans. That means it is time for a new episode, just in time for the holiday season! It’s like a present! A free present that always has been free and is free again!

Donations reached to 75% of the goal, so there is still room if you would like to support the Mustache Rangers. Just because the podcasts are back does not mean the funding is complete. The Mustache Rangers just couldn’t wait to bring new episodes to the public. So enjoy the new podcast, and consider a donation if you have not done so yet.

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Donation Update and New Episodes

MR Central Command — Tue, 16 Dec 2008 15:51:33 +0000

We are a touch above the halfway point in our donation drive. The show of support for the Mustache Rangers has been fantastic so far, and we’re hoping to make up the final $100 dollars with your help.

But as a show of good faith, our replacement equipment has been purchased. That means we will begin production of new Mustache Rangers episodes as quickly as possible.

We are hoping that, if you have yet to donate at this point, you will at least consider it. The Mustache Rangers has been putting out this free production for almost two years now. And we are happy to keep your ears stuffed with adventures. But we are not too proud to ask for help.

So there is your not-so-funny-but-still-exciting news update. New episodes coming soon, and donate if you find the means. Thank you, citizens and cadets alike!

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Pit Stop: Chicago

MR Central Command — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 15:02:39 +0000

The Mustache Rangers will be making a short stop in Chicago this weekend to lighten to mood for the sullen midwesterners. While the Mustache Rangers generally save their good-time stage antics for the timid people of Minnesota, Illinoisians will soon be able to fill their heads with live tales of real adventure.

Here are your details:

Where: The Playground Theater
Address: 3209 N Halsted Street, Chicago, IL
Time: Saturday, December 13, 2008 at 8:00pm
Price: $10.00

And you get more than just the Mustache Rangers. You get to see three groups of performers who are not the Mustache Rangers. That’s a deal and a half. Or, rather, four deals for the price of one deal.

So come to the show, if live in or around the Chicago-land area. But be careful. It is the windy city, and a politician may just blow in your ear. That means they like you.

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Less Words, More Graphics, Worse Graphics, Funds

MR Central Command — Fri, 05 Dec 2008 14:55:12 +0000

The head accountants at Mustache Rangers Central Command have finished counting the current donations. Actually, it’s just one accountant and he was hired specifically for donation counting. Once the goal is reached, he will be fired. But do not cry. The fund drive is nearly half-over! How much nearly half-over exactly? Well, the keen graphic bellow will tell you the story.

The post Less Words, More Graphics, Worse Graphics, Funds appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

35% Mark

MR Central Command — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 16:00:48 +0000

Just a quick update, with no graphics. Graphics take time, and time is money. So we don’t want to spend any time.

We have reached 35% of our goal. Keep it coming, boys and girls. Make Doc Johnson proud.

The post 35% Mark appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Another Day, Another Funds Update

MR Central Command — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 15:08:54 +0000

To the delight and the shock of the Mustache Rangers, funds for functioning recording equipment have continued to roll in. We have reached the 30% mark, which is 10% more mark than yesterday.

This process may take a little longer than it would seem. Most fans of the Mustache Rangers limit their interaction to podcast downloading, and not website visiting. And that is not a dig at their process. Really, there has been little reason to come visit the website when you can automatically download the weekly podcast with little hassle. So many fans may not be seeing this entertaining message of pleading.

We hope to continue the updating of good time reading words here, to accompany the good time listening words. So along with the return of the podcast episodes, we hope to keep you entertained with daily articles on the perils and pleasures of space travel. Or recipes for things containing crust and fruit.

To wrap up this missive, we offer our humblest thanks to everyone who has donated thus far. We appreciate your efforts to make our efforts more effortless.

And, of course, the donation button can be found below.

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Funding Has Started

MR Central Command — Tue, 02 Dec 2008 15:27:40 +0000

After a quick first day of requesting donations, the Mustache Rangers have received their first contribution. As you can see by the hastily thrown together graphic of what might be a thermometer, donations are almost up to the $40 dollar mark. And almost $40 dollars is almost $50 dollars. That is almost almost a quarter way to the $200 goal.

If everyone who listened to the Mustache Rangers gave a single lonely dollar, the goal would be met handily. Of course, those are pie in the sky hopes. And while we do own a rocket ship, the pie seems to be forever out of reach.

To make things more reasonable, if 20 people gave $10 each, the goal could also be met. There are many ways to make numbers equal other numbers. Use your imaginations.

Well, it’s time for the Mustache Rangers to have more adventures. Unfortunately, there is still no recording device to capture their adventures. If the Mustache Rangers have adventures without a recording device to capture them, are they still incredibly amusing?

The post Funding Has Started appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Great Mustache Rangers Donation Request

MR Central Command — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 15:06:16 +0000

The Mustache Rangers have come in to some trouble. The hardware used to record their golden voices has broken. Thus, podcasts are on hold until this issue can be resolved. The damage runs about $200, which is hard to release from space savings due to the space economy and upcoming space holidays.

One loyal civilian suggested the adding of a donation button to this website, in case other listeners who enjoy the Mustache Rangers would like to assist in the fund raising. So here it is. The PayPal button for those who love the Mustache Rangers and would like to support the creation of future podcasts.

That is it. Watch next week for more information on the fund drive and the Mustache Ranger’s special live performance in Chicago on December 13th. Keep healthy, cadets!

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 86

MR Central Command — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 10:00:49 +0000

Let us lay it on the line. The Mustache Rangers are loved by all. As long as we can agree to that, we will be fine. All other conversation is simply warm sound, after that argument has been put to rest.

The Mustache Rangers argue about clothing once again in this week’s episode. Bring it to your ears.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 86 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers: Episode 85

MR Central Command — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 10:00:51 +0000

It is Monday. You know the routine. Read these words, that have nothing to do with this week’s podcast, and then listen to the podcast. Or don’t read these words at all. It matters not.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 84

MR Central Command — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 10:00:13 +0000

Some things are difficult to believe. For example, jelly is made not of fruit but of tree bark. Training wheels only line the pockets of training wheel producing companies. Night time is when the sun does it with the moon.

It is not difficult to believe that the Mustache Rangers have another podcast episode for you this week. We hope that you love expertly done impressions.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 83

MR Central Command — Mon, 27 Oct 2008 09:00:10 +0000

Good times are not meant to be had. They are to be taken. You can not simply wait for them to happen, or expect that you deserve them. Real men make their own good times. Women probably do this too, but we have not funded any research to prove positive one way or the other.

The Mustache Rangers talks about precious stones in this week’s podcast episode. It is enjoyable for all!

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 83 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Fan Art: Christopher Jones and Melissa Kaercher

MR Central Command — Thu, 23 Oct 2008 14:09:14 +0000

At long last, wizards Christopher Jones and Melissa Kaercher have captured the Mustache Rangers and shrunk them into tiny hand painted plastic avatars.

This has been a lie, for your entertainment. These two talented creatures are not wizards, but human beings with skills in the graphical arts. The tiny hand painted plastic avatars bit was not a farce, as you can see by the picture. We apologize. We should have made our lies and not lies more clear.

Christopher and Melissa have done art for comics such as Dr. Blink: Superhero Shrink and many others. We are not here to makes lists for you. We have provided you links to their websites. Be not lazy and check out their impressive portfolios yourselves.

Thank you, kind wizards, for returning the Mustache Rangers to their correct fleshy feel and size. Did we say that Christopher and Melissa were not wizards? That was a lie!

The post Fan Art: Christopher Jones and Melissa Kaercher appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers: Episode 82

MR Central Command — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 10:00:52 +0000

The Mustache Rangers were on one of their many missions last week. Sometimes, duty gets in the way of updating podcasts. But rest assured, the podcast was not late due to hate. There was not hate involved in any way.

The Mustache Rangers love you. They also wish you wouldn’t do that one bad thing you keep doing. You know.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 82 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers: Episode 81

MR Central Command — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 09:00:10 +0000

Every single moment has the possibility of greatness. Instead of sitting there, doing nothing, you could punch the fella next to you. Odds are, they are asking for it. But be quick. Odds also show that he is a fan of the Mustache Rangers and is reading the exact same sentence. You had best hope his brain is slower than yours. Really, isn’t that enough cause for a punching?

The Mustache Rangers bring a spoonful of sass to this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy it with a spoonful of Doc Johnson’s Olde Tyme Elixir.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 80

MR Central Command — Sun, 21 Sep 2008 14:52:54 +0000

Death is never an easy topic of conversation. Unless it is in referring to a squirrel. “Did that squirrel just die,” Benefred Pasterborf would ask. “It certainly did,” Tranzer Fadingtoncon would reply. “Fan-tastic,” Geraldert Fosterpant would add. Do you see? Only talk about the deaths of squirrels and your conversation will be as crisp as an item the is crisp.

The Mustache Rangers refer to non-squirrel death in this week’s podcast episode. Beware its lack of social formalities.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 79

MR Central Command — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 09:00:52 +0000

Rock formations are boring. They are only slightly interesting if they look like something that is not a rock. But still, it’s just a rock that looks like something. Why not look at that thing? Also, if seahorses don’t freak you out, they should. Those things are profoundly messed up.

The Mustache Rangers deal with a situation into this week’s podcast. You will soon find yourself in a listening situation.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 78

MR Central Command — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 09:00:11 +0000

There is little in life more important than a favorite outfit. Scraps of colored cloth can make you feel invincible against the daily tragedy that is life. That statement also leaves out the immeasurable feeling brought upon by a perfect fit. Like everything in the known universe, it all boils down to hugging.

The Mustache Rangers deal with clothing, exciting clothing, in this week’s podcast episode. Enjoy it with clothes.

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The Mustache Rangers in person this weekend

MR Central Command — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 15:54:20 +0000

Gasoline can be expensive, and going to grand mama’s house can cost a pretty penny. Now imagine that Earth is grand mama’s house and you are light years away. That is one pricey trip.

But the Mustache Rangers make this trip gladly and with little to much bickering. The Mustache Rangers will be performing live on a well lit stage this weekend for your enjoyment! Find the details below.

What: Improv a Go-Go
Where: Brave New Workshop
When: September 7, 2008 at 8pm
Price: $1

Did you find the details? Now they are above. Boy, you really are a mess. You should come see some live comedy this weekend. That will straighten you right out. See details above above.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 77

MR Central Command — Mon, 01 Sep 2008 09:00:04 +0000

Sometimes the simplest answer is not always the best. For example, if a friend of yours owns something that you would like and you think they don’t deserve, don’t blow it up. That would be the easy thing to do. The proper solution, in this circumstance, is theft. It is not the first place your mind would jump. High explosives are always there to get the job done. But a little bit of time spent on stealing can really increase the amount of things you have.

The Mustache Rangers don’t deal with stealing in this week’s episode. Enjoy it for now!

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 77 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Featured Fan Art by John Wallace

MR Central Command — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 14:14:19 +0000

Citizen, and relative unknown, John Wallace has taken time out of designing magazine ads for ladies undergarment undergarments (“Two layers, because one is breachable!”) to favor us with his rendition of the Mustache Rangers.

What Citizen Wallace has done here is really quite brilliant. As you can plainly see, Commander Major and First Lieutenant are represented by eggs. Not literal eggs, of course. The drawing seems to be done by simple graphite rubbings, not smeared ovum and membranes. But the Mustache Rangers seem to be represented in egg form, with oval bodies and heads.

Jallace (J minus Ohn plus Wallace minus W) is giving us art and also instructions on creating delicious hors d’Ã…â€œuvres. All you need is eggs, toothpicks, and dried parsley. Lots and lots of dried parsley! Your guests (if you have no friends) will be delighted with your creative and tasty treats! And you, in turn, can thank Jallace.

Thank you, Citizen Jallace, for your support.

Fan art will be accepted from all in the mustacherangers@gmail.com electric message depository.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 76

MR Central Command — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 09:00:29 +0000

The market can be a very confusing place. People are yelling. Monies are exchanging hands. Sometimes there are open mouth kisses. It is a sea limbs, one can get lost. It is good to be tethered and blindfolded when going into a market. In fact, this is a good idea for any situation.

The Mustache Rangers have another brand new adventure today. But, really, what is new anymore? Regardless, you’ll probably enjoy it. Enjoy!

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 76 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Featured Fan Art by Adam Svec

MR Central Command — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 16:30:59 +0000

Citizen Adam Svec of citizen rock group The Glad Version has taken it upon himself to favor the Mustache Rangers with his non-musical artistry.

As you can clearly see, the picture features some sort of banana in a dress heading towards a flaming egg which is prepared for fertilization. The best art needs no interpretation.

This piece is actually more of a thinly veiled commentary on the over utilization of sandwich holders in non-regulation space vehicles. Citizen Svec is obviously aware of the Mustache Rangers and their heartfelt ties to this cause.

We hope this does not need to be restated, but please please please do not install too many sandwich holders in your custom made non-regulation space traveling vehicles.

Thank you, Citizen Adam, for your support.

Fan art will be accepted from all in the mustacherangers@gmail.com electric message depository.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 75

MR Central Command — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 09:00:03 +0000

The dust has settled, and the Mustache Rangers are back. Rest assured, adventures were being had during the entire absence. There were some incredible happenings. It is a shame you missed them. But, please, do enjoy the most recent episode.

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Excuse Our Space Dust

MR Central Command — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 14:03:34 +0000

It seems that in upgrading the software for this glorious website, things become a bit broken. No podcasts can be attached to these posts, which means no new episodes can currently be posted.

Rest assured, there are podcasts to be posted. We just can’t do it! We will get this fixed as soon as possible. And when we say “get this fixed,” we mean we’ll wait around until someone makes a fix and we can implement it.

Hugs and kisses, minus the kisses,
Mustache Rangers Central Command

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 74

MR Central Command — Mon, 28 Jul 2008 10:00:12 +0000

The world is a terrible place and we are all cursed. If you found yourself nodding to the previous sentence, you have failed the test. You can take it over as many times as you would like. We understand that things get heavy.

The Mustache Rangers throw a lot of ideas against the wall in today’s internetpod netpodcastnet. Enjoy it with salted tea.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 73

MR Central Command — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 10:00:07 +0000

The only thing quieter than a rock sitting all by itself is mime pretending to be a rock sitting all by itself. And we’re talking about a professional mime here. Not your weekend birthday party mime. Another note, as long as we’re talking here. Children do not like mimes.

The Mustache Rangers deal with a little silence today, but really there is a lot of talking. Enjoy the interpod netcast.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 72

MR Central Command — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 07:00:58 +0000

Every once in a blue moon (when the Lords of America decide to paint the moon, generally once ever decade), you get a really good hamburger. And it kind of makes you wonder why you’ve been eating vegetables at all. But then, the next hamburger you get is just “okay” again. At least you’ll have the memory of that one hamburger.

The Mustache Rangers consume no food in this week’s episode. We hope that information didn’t make you sad.

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The Mighty Quote Index

MR Central Command — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 00:09:35 +0000

The creation of a mighty Mustache Rangers quote index is underway. Soon, you will be able to say, “oh drat. I know something funny was said at some point, but can not, for the life of me, remember when it was said.” And then, after you say this, you will be able to use the magic of indexing to help your shoddy memory.

But this process becomes even easier with you, the listener. If you have any favorite quotes, please list them and which episodes they appear in. Then, when your mind eventually fails, you will have electricity and metal to help you remember.

You can leave a comment with your indexable quote, or email the Mustache Rangers at mustacheranger@gmail.com. Either way, thank you for doing some of our work for us. We are very busy killing things that are different from us.

The post The Mighty Quote Index appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers: Episode 71

MR Central Command — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 10:00:33 +0000

If space were not nothing, it would be totally in your face. It would, for example, be all, like, what is up? It would be quite overwhelming, if it weren’t such a massive amount of emptiness. Given any mass, it would be the person you avoid at most well planned parties.

The Mustache Rangers have another adventure, of sorts, in today’s interpod netcast internet podcast. Cast.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 70

MR Central Command — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 10:00:42 +0000

After achieving everything they wanted to do on Earth at the Twin Cities Improv Festival, the Mustache Rangers have once again left fertile ground for the thankless embrace of space. There is no applause in space. There isn’t really anything in space.

The Mustache Rangers bring you an new podcast adventure today, full of action and movement and plot. Or not. Enjoy!

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 70 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Twin Cities Improv Festival

MR Central Command — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 20:17:28 +0000

The Mustache Rangers are racing time and space to make it back to Earth for the Twin Cities Improv Festival. There may be alien civilizations to conquer, but the people of Earth can have morale issues and need an evening of mandatory cheer every now and again.

The Mustache Rangers will be dispensing cheer as they recount tales of their space adventures live on the Brave New Workshop stage. You should come and enjoy the Mustache Rangers, along with many of the other delightful troupes at the Twin Cities Improv Festival.

You may find your Mustache Rangers related time information below.

When: June 29th, 2008, 8PM CST
Where: Twin Cities Improv Festival
2605 Hennepin Ave S, Minneapolis, MN 55408
Price: $10

See you soon, Cadets!

The post Twin Cities Improv Festival appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers: Episode 69

MR Central Command — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 10:00:45 +0000

Get your giggling out of your lungs, because the sixty-ninth episode of the Mustache Rangers is here for our mutual pleasure. If you enjoy the running of marathons, or hate them, or feel no way whatsoever about them, you will enjoy this week’s episode. If you have no feelings at all, then we ask that our deaths be quick and painless.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 68

MR Central Command — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 10:00:24 +0000

As mentioned in the podcast for today, the Mustache Rangers would like your help to spread their words. Today, you can do three things. Tell 5 people about the Mustache Rangers. Digg the Mustache Rangers. Leave positive feedback for the Mustache Rangers on iTunes.

It’s that easy. Do all or one of them, but don’t you dare do none. Now, enjoy this week’s episode!

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 67

MR Central Command — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 10:00:33 +0000

There is a fine line between a point and a line. Now you know geometry. Congratulations.

The Mustache Rangers have their many hands full into this week’s interpod netcast podcast. Enjoy with your favorite beverage.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 67 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers: Episode 66

MR Central Command — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 10:00:44 +0000

The people of Earth take the changing of days for granted. They give little to no time considering how the other half live. The space half. Flying from galaxy to galaxy with useless sundials. It was a bad investment.

The Mustache Rangers miss their months in the current interpod netcast episode. We hope that you feel some sort of sympathy.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 66 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers Punch Out! Live

MR Central Command — Mon, 19 May 2008 14:24:03 +0000

The Mustache Rangers are making a special visit to Earth this Friday. It seems that an “improvisational” “comedy” group by the name of Family Night has called out the Mustache Rangers. And as much as the Mustache Rangers enjoy being called out, this night of families said it with a nasty inflection.

And so, the Mustache Rangers will be doing battle with this Family Night on stage, for the pleasure of you! Quick! Find details on this “performance” below!

When: May 23rd, 2008, 11PM CST
Where: Punch Out! at the Brave New Workshop
2605 Hennepin Ave S, Minneapolis, MN 55408
Cost: $10.00

Someone will go home crying. If you enjoy crying, you will love this.

If you love the Mustache Rangers, you will make it to this show and make sure that they are not sent home crying. Crying in space can be dangerous, and can lead to death or headaches.

The post The Mustache Rangers Punch Out! Live appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers: Episode 65

MR Central Command — Mon, 19 May 2008 10:00:23 +0000

Danger seems to be the middle name of many a person. The people who claim this tend to spend most of their free time staring at a screen with moving or static pictures. The middle name is wasted on them.

The Mustache Rangers encounter danger in today’s interpod netcast internet podcast. Enjoy the danger.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 65 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers: Episode 64

MR Central Command — Mon, 12 May 2008 10:00:28 +0000

One thing is always relative to another, unless you are referring to Uncle Stan. Uncle Stan is not really your uncle, nor is he made up of matter like you or I. Remember that the next time he tries to count your ribs.

The Mustache Rangers explore the things brought by time in today’s podcast episode. Enjoy it without penalty.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 64 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers: Episode 63

MR Central Command — Mon, 05 May 2008 10:00:05 +0000

If you have never heard of an iceberg before, let us explain it for you. It is a smallish sort of town made completely of ice. Commerce flows normally, just slower.

The Mustache Rangers deal slightly with ice in today’s podcast episode. Put it into your brain. Now.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 63 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers: Episode 62

MR Central Command — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 10:00:23 +0000

Nicknames are for the strong and the weak alike. However, nicknames serve different purposes for these two groups. Just keep this truth in mind. The strong hand out all nicknames, and the strong hate the weak. Hopefully, this information will help you out of some jam in the near future.

Today, the Mustache Rangers receive nicknames. Enjoy it.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 62 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers: Episode 61

MR Central Command — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 10:00:48 +0000

After a week of trying to put a squarish toy square into a roundish toy circle hole, the adventures of the Mustache Rangers are back. In a rare continuation, they continue to continue their storyline from the previous episode. Enjoy it.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 61 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Technical Malfunctory

MR Central Command — Tue, 15 Apr 2008 16:20:12 +0000

Apologies to our loyal followers. This weekend, the podcast translation crew ran in to technical difficulties. The podcast for this week has been delayed until the week the follows this week. Please accept our apologies and hunt down those who do not accept our apologies. They don’t have to be such a big jerk about it, after all.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 60

MR Central Command — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 10:00:24 +0000

There is cult on a distant planet that does not believe in tiptoeing. That may not be a harsh enough way to describe their belief. It is not as if they think tiptoeing exists but they have no faith in it. They actually believe there is no tiptoeing. They throw some fantastic shindigs.

Be careful of today’s episode of the Mustache Rangers. It will certainly be careful of you.

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The Mustache Rangers LIVE

MR Central Command — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 19:49:32 +0000

Often times, the Mustache Rangers will come to Earth and recount their most exciting tales live to a theater audience. Well, there is now a space for all of your Mustache Rangers live performance information.

Simply click on this page for information on upcoming live Mustache Rangers shows.

But click fast! Their next live appearance is this weekend, and the cost to view is but one dollar!

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 59

MR Central Command — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 10:00:03 +0000

We live in a complicated and ever changing world. Galaxies, on the other hand, are constant and never change. You may think they collide and rip each other to pieces, but that thinking would be deadly incorrect. You can always count on the constant of the never changing galaxy.

The Mustache Rangers check their heads in today’s interpod netcast. Pick up your ears and listen to it.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 58

MR Central Command — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 10:00:19 +0000

There are an amazing variety of terrible moving pictures produced in our modern times. Sometimes it would be easier to close your eyes and let the all consuming darkness take you away. But some of these moving pictures involve the humors antics of animals. These are the pictures worth living for.

The Mustache Rangers discuss art in today’s interpod netcast. Enjoy it.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 58 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Your Favorite Episode

MR Central Command — Wed, 19 Mar 2008 16:08:16 +0000

Mustache Rangers Central Command is taking a informally mandatory survey of the listening public. It is demanded that you please comment on your favorite Mustache Rangers Interpod Netcast, of your own free will. If you would be kind enough to absolutely indicate your preferred episode and your reasons for preference, Mustache Rangers Central Command will not be forced to cause harm to you. Or not cause harm to you.

Your comments can be placed in the comment receptacle. You are wasting our time by continuing to read our words. You need to begin making your own words. Now.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 57

MR Central Command — Mon, 17 Mar 2008 10:00:11 +0000

The Mustache Rangers have found away into the heart of a small boy. This small boy had no say in the matter. In fact, the small boy doesn’t even exist. He is simply a boy who now lives only in your mind. Please, do not kill this young boy by forgetting him.

A new episode of the Mustache Rangers is available to you today. For pleasure.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 56

MR Central Command — Mon, 10 Mar 2008 10:00:16 +0000

Our books of ancient history describe a moving picture presentation by the name of Mr. Destiny. Copies of this presentation on entertainment disc no longer exist. We, the people of the present, can still enjoy the stories of Mr. Destiny, but they are passed on by word of mouth. Sometimes the words to the tale change, but this timeless story of a mouse filing for a business loan will continue on through the ages.

The Mustache Rangers meet their own sort of destiny in today’s interpod netcast adventure. It is your destiny to enjoy it.

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Moustache Me Approved

MR Central Command — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 19:58:52 +0000

After many years of deliberation, Mustache Rangers Central Command has decided to approve the passing on of the Moustache Me webnet pagesite link.

The humans who run Moustache Me endorse the sticking of mustaches onto advertisements that have no mustaches. Mustache-less advertisements are an abomination to the Great Mustache. He appreciates all that correct this, in a legal manner.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 55

MR Central Command — Mon, 03 Mar 2008 10:00:27 +0000

The great beyond may not be all that great. Or, now that we’ve had a chance to think it over, all that beyond. Thank goodness there are those out there who will pretend to communicate with your loved ones for monies. They are truly beyond great.

The Mustache Rangers take death, for instance, in this week’s interpod netcast. Enjoy it while you can.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 55 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers: Episode 54

MR Central Command — Mon, 25 Feb 2008 10:00:24 +0000

Thinking leads to trouble, and no good comes of it. When you think you might be having a thought, simply turn to one of the government’s many regulation entertainment programs. For instance, there is the House of Apples located in every town where you can practice eating apples. Since apples do not exist, you will be using faux horse chestnuts. Faux because horse chestnuts no longer exist. Or you can mosey on down to the Twirl Your Arms Around center, where an instructor will indicate when you should twirl your arms around. These are all fine alternatives to thinking.

We think that you should listen to the Mustache Rangers Interpod Netcast today.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 53

MR Central Command — Mon, 18 Feb 2008 10:00:35 +0000

It is the charge of every Earth-liver to consume. Food, plastics, and oxygen are ripe for the literal and non-literal digestion. Shoes, however, are a different sort of beast. Neither plastic nor oxygen, they sit and wait in a bin of blank description. The greatest scientist in the time of our great-great-grandchildren may finally discover an adequate category for the shoe, but we will not be alive to see it. But you may fall asleep, knowing that our future is safe.

The Mustache Rangers have put together another interpod netcast for your listening enjoyment. So pleasure your ears with their sweet sounds. But pleasure only within the legal limit, please.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 52

MR Central Command — Mon, 11 Feb 2008 10:00:14 +0000

It has come to our attention that the span of attention that most people can hold is less than ten seconds. Luckily for these individuals, the Short Attention Span Termination Squad also had a short attention span. Sadly, they are unable to even terminate themselves. It is was a terrible program, and we are sorry for having wasted your monies on it.

Today, the Mustache Rangers make you happy. So you had best listen closely to their message of pieces.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 52 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers: Episode 51

MR Central Command — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 10:00:54 +0000

Another Monday has arrived. Do not expect a fanfare for a Monday. It is comparable to another Meredith or Beatrice arriving at your party. The come along with regularity, and generally bring stories of shopping at craft stores. Yes, a Monday is not a special thing in the least.

Enjoy today’s interpod netcast of the Mustache Rangers. It will in enjoy you, that is guaranteed.

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The Mustache Rangers: Episode 50

MR Central Command — Mon, 28 Jan 2008 10:00:32 +0000

The Mustache Rangers have reached the arbitrary 50 episode mark! What better way to celebrate than with your families? You should head home right now and take care of the celebration. This is a mandatory celebration. All persons of non-celebration will be stripped of their VIP status, and downgraded to IP. And then P. And then P, but in a lower case. You have been warned.

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