The Next Goal» Holly Jahangiri

Goals and Engagement: Interview with Brian Belfitt, Founder of Blog Engage

Holly Jahangiri — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 10:05:15 +0000

Brian Belfitt’s a busy man – busy building a thriving community of bloggers known as Blog Engage. It took me nearly three and a half months to convince him to take a short break and chat with me about his goals, his vision, and the site he has so passionately built from the ground up.

“Brian, what were you thinking when you started Blog Engage, four years ago? What were your goals, then – personally and professionally?”

Brian didn’t hesitate. “When I first started Blog Engage,” he said, “I knew I wanted to start a community that encouraged members to share their own content. One of the biggest issues I had seen online was the inability to link back to your own stuff without looking like a spammer. When I created Blog Engage I knew it had to be the opposite, I knew we had to not only allow self promotion but encourage it.

“I think to this day we have accomplished this and I’m very happy with the amount of sharing Blog Engage members are doing. The self promoting concept went very well and has worked since we started.”

It seems like a long time – and then again, only yesterday. “You’re a blogging multimillionaire by now, aren’t you?” I asked.

“I’ll be very honest I do well with Blog Engage,” said Brian. “I work full time by myself so I don’t have much overhead and the income is great. I’m no millionaire but I am proof if you have an idea and work hard at it, you can succeed. I’m thankful I don’t rely on advertisements; I have real paying customers—I syndicate their content and do social media marketing for them. It’s a great job and all my customers are really supportive of what I do.”

“Brian, I know that it takes a lot of time, dedication, and energy to do what you do – it’s not exactly a 9 to 5 job when you’re an entrepreneur with a global clientele. Well what keeps you going, then?”

“I enjoy helping others online with social media marketing, I enjoy meeting all these amazing and great people, I love the new relationships I’m building, in fact it all adds up and I tend to love everything I do online.

“I also enjoy being my own boss. I’m 31 years old and if I play my cards right and build Blog Engage well I could be retired and enjoying life as planned before I turn 40. I don’t have intentions on selling Blog Engage but let’s face the facts, if it was the right offer, I would be back to blogging only full time.”

“How does Blog Engage help bloggers to meet their goals?”

“Blog engage can be a useful tool in so many ways,” Brian answered. His enthusiasm was evident as he warmed to his subject. “If you’re looking for ideas, we have tons of categories that will generate some brain movement. If you’re looking for niche blogs to comment on we have that as well. We have tons of huge brand name bloggers you can learn from and be motivated by.

“Blog Engage also offers a great place to build backlinks. I moderate all our members content and ensure it’s top quality when submitted to our community. Google knows this and ranks our link value very high. I’m very strict when it comes to the type of content users submit and design quality of the site itself.”

“Yes, that’s one of the things I like about it – no one wants their content lost in a sea of spam and unsavory scams. It’s great that you’re always on top of things, there, Brian. So… What’s your biggest professional goal, right now? Do you have any big, personal ‘life goal’?”

As passionate as Brian is about Blog Engage, there’s clearly a higher priority for him. “I would like to retire young enough to enjoy life. This has always been my goal. I want children and the family thing as well. I’m married, been with my wife now for over 11 years the last two have been in marriage. We are working hard at creating our little family, and hopefully we will be blessed with healthy children. I really look forward to having my own children… I’m 31 already here!” Brian laughed, but it was a laugh meant to be shared with kids of his own. I’ve only recently realized how much Brian Belfitt enjoys teaching and encouraging kids. I can see him being a dad.

“What do you do to stay on track and accomplish your goals? Do you have a plan? Do you formulate ‘SMART’ goals?”

“Ironic—I just did a guest article on Brian Hawkins blog about creating a daily plan and organizing your time slots to accomplish tasks more efficiently. This by far is the best method of getting things done and reaching goals. Every day you must have a plan to succeed, this is with anything you do it life not just blogging.”

“What are your biggest obstacles, Brian? How do you deal with obstacles and set-backs?”

“Right now the biggest challenge I have is getting people motivated. It’s so hard to keep a live and entertaining community for us. This has always been difficult for me. It’s hard to get the members voting and visiting each others’ articles so as I move forward day by day the biggest challenge I face is community motivation.

“With that said we have a lot of amazing members that do in fact visit and engage daily. These are the members that make Blog Engage as great as it is today. These Blog Engage members know who they are and I send a big thank you to them now for helping make Blog Engage as awesome as it is today.”

That’s true. I remember going from “lone wolf” blogger to meeting all these fantastic, supportive, engaging bloggers – and a lot of them, I met through Blog Engage. Of course, I had to ask Brian about the contest he sponsored – the contest in which TheNextGoal.com was born – “As one of the sponsors of Weblogbetter’s Surviving the Blog Contest, what do you think of how the contest turned out? Would you sponsor a contest like it, again, in the future?”

“I must say I didn’t sponsor the contest for the type it was or for the advertising. I supported this idea because it was a Blog Engage member behind it, and it was the most unique ideas I’ve ever seen online for a blogging contest. I think it turned out great; Holly, you did an amazing job winning that contest. If there was another version of this contest, yes—I would sponsor it again if I had the funds.”

“Thank you, Brian!” And with that, Brian had to get back to work. Blog Engage has recently undergone a major transformation: the design is more attractive; the site runs faster; the site itself, the blog, and the forums all work together as a whole – it’s really remarkable what he’s accomplished. I hope everyone reading this interview will at least join the site and check it out – there’s not been a better time to do so!

Goals and Engagement: Interview with Brian Belfitt, Founder of Blog Engage is a post from: The Next Goal

About Holly Jahangiri

Holly Jahangiri lives in Texas and claims to channel the spirits of Edgar Allan Poe, O. Henry and Erma Bombeck. She has known since fifth grade that she wanted to be a professional writer. Holly is a technical communicator whose imagination is allowed free rein in her short stories, children's books, and poetry. You can visit her personal blog, "It's All a Matter of Perspective," at http://jahangiri.us/new.

Ironic, Isn’t It? Letting Go of the Clean Slate Mentality

Holly Jahangiri — Sun, 08 Jan 2012 14:56:15 +0000

You might think that a blog devoted to goal-setting and success would be full of articles on 2012 New Year’s Resolutions during the first week of the new year – and yet, here we are, strangely silent. The team has been taking an extended – if well deserved – holiday break! Goals and resolutions can be set at any time.

In fact, there’s nothing sacred about setting them on January 1. It may even be a bad idea.

Research shows that about 80 percent of people who make resolutions on Jan. 1 fall off the wagon by Valentine’s Day, according to Marti Hope Gonzales, an associate professor of psychology at the University of Minnesota.

From www.nytimes.com (share this quote)

We get all caught up in the notion of starting with a “clean slate” – I know that, somehow, I feel worse about breaking resolutions made on a fresh new day, new week, or new year than I do about goals set at 2:13 PM on a Tuesday afternoon. You’d think the guilt would motivate, but what tends to happen is, we feel that sensation of failure – the slate is smudged, the day is shot, the year is over before it’s begun. Discouragement sets in early, along with all its negative self-talk. The thing to do, then, is to break free of the clean slate. Instead, imagine the slate full of bad habits and scribbles – imagine yourself cleaning it up, one corner or smudge at a time. Begin your resolutions now – right now – where you stand. Simply decide if it’s something you really want to do – to develop a new and better habit, to be slimmer and fitter, to accomplish a professional goal; are you truly committed? Is it a crazy big goal you’re convinced you could never accomplish? Is it a crazy big goal you MIGHT not manage in a year, but are ready – wholeheartedly ready – to try? Every journey begins with lifting a foot or setting a wheel in motion. Begin where you are, recognizing that you will need, now and then, to pause and refuel – perhaps to detour down the path less traveled. The trick is to keep moving forward. That’s progress.

Pardon Our Dust

Another reason for our “hiatus,” besides the fact that after ten weeks of frenzied blogging and competition, the Frog Bloggers needed to do something – anything – besides blogging, is that part of the prize is a new web hosting home for TheNextGoal.com. We thought we were moving to it last week, and didn’t want anything to get lost in the move. All the boxes were packed and labeled – twice – and the moving trucks arrived. The dust flew as they went to work. And apparently, some of it worked its way into the server’s gears or one of the gerbils was allergic to frogs – but our new web host reportedly had some “technical difficulties” and the move’s been postponed. So do expect a bit of dust and shifting ground as we eventually do get settled in to more permanent digs. We hope, at least, that our new host won’t ever display “account suspended” just because you like us too much.

Speaking of Goals

We’ve been individually thinking about ours – posting them on our personal blogs (well, except for Neeraj, who’s doing his own hush-hush redesign over there at The Freelancer Diary and celebrating another trip around the sun by bodysurfing at Goa and Brandon – these two are busy with plans to attend grad school soon!).

Get Ready To Make 2012 Your Best Year Yet!

Kicking Butt in 2012

Resolute in 2012

and maybe one of the craziest, biggest goals is one that started out as a silly, tongue-in-cheek dare aimed at my “frienemy” from Team1, Mitch Allen – who’d flippantly said something about winning a Hugo Award being the “most important thing in life.” That got me thinking – why not? Even as I smacked him with the velvet gauntlet, the mental wheels were seriously turning, and the Race to the Hugo was on.

So, there are some of our goals – we’d love it if you’d share yours with us! Feel free to leave them – or links to them – in the comments, below. What’s your most important goal for 2012?

Ironic, Isn’t It? Letting Go of the Clean Slate Mentality is a post from: The Next Goal

About Holly Jahangiri

Little Mountain, Big Mystery: Bob Sanchez Talks About Writing and His Next Goal

Holly Jahangiri — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 11:00:31 +0000

Detective Sam Long, Lowell, Massachusetts police officer, has worked hard to put his tormented past behind him and fit in with his American colleagues. But when a murder in Lowell’s Asian community brings back visions of the Killing Fields, Sambath Long, Cambodian refugee and naturalized U.S. citizen, upholds the law he has sworn to enforce, despite his private belief that maybe the murderer deserves a medal. As voices from his past begin to haunt his waking dreams, Sam finds comfort in the love of his American English-teacher wife, Julie, and their daughter Trish. But he has not burdened them with the horrors he left behind in Cambodia. And when he comes too close to solving the case, Sam is faced, once again, with being unable to protect the family he loves.

Bob Sanchez has written a convincing murder mystery, Little Mountain, set in Lowell, Massachusetts, in the midst of a community of Asian immigrants and refugees that respects, fears, and deeply distrusts authority. Much as I enjoy a good murder mystery, I prefer character-driven drama, and Sanchez hooked me from the start with a combination of smooth, engaging writing and believable characters I cared to know better. I particularly liked Detective Sambath Long and his wife Julie, the irrepressible Pheary and her mom, and Fitchie, the devoted husband and partner. By contrast, I despised young Viseth Kim, but wanted to know what made him the contemptible young man he’d become. I ached for his mother.

I recently had the chance to interview Bob for TheNextGoal:

“Bob, I’ve just finished reading Little Mountain,” I said. In fact, the first thing I did while recovering from the Surviving the Blog Contest and a nasty cold was to load it onto my Nook and curl up with it under the covers. “It wasn’t hard to get into, and once I did, it was very difficult to put down. There are a few things I’m curious about – first, how did the story occur to you – what inspired it?”

“In early 1980,” Bob said, “my family sponsored one of the first Cambodian refugee families to arrive in Lowell, Massachusetts from the camps in Thailand. We bonded with them while thousands of other Cambodians arrived in the city, so to a certain extent our lives intertwined. The inspiration was all around me. I wrote a mainstream novel that wasn’t much good, but I learned a lot from it. Since I love mysteries, it seemed fitting to use much of my material in a mystery format.”

“It takes courage and respect to write credibly about people whose nationality and culture are very different from our own.” I know; I’ve tried. I always wonder if the people I’m writing about would laugh, or roll their eyes, at my mistakes. “It’s also important, as a writer, to do it honestly and interestingly. Did you have any concerns, in writing about the Cambodian-American community portrayed in Little Mountain? What were they?”

“I was concerned that I would get facts wrong and that the story wouldn’t delve deeply enough into the culture. One specific example concerned a Khmer phrase I heard often from one person. It was an expression of surprise, and I wanted to use it in the book.” Bob smiled and looked a little sheepish. “When I asked around, I learned it was a pretty vile profanity. Also, the idea that some refugees would be former Khmer Rouge was at first a guess on my part and was key to the story. That assumption turned out to be correct, or at least never disputed.”

That gave me pause, and sent a small chill down my spine. “Bob, what practical advice would you give a writer dealing with characters who are very foreign to him or her?”

“It depends on the nature of the story and the characters, but it helps if you can go to their country, which I didn’t have the resources to do.” Bob continued, “Barring that, talk to a variety of people from that country, and then do plenty of library research. Don’t get all your information from just one or two sources. For example, one Cambodian told me that wife-beating was customary in his country. Other Cambodians vehemently denied it.”

“Your story touches on a theme that I think crosses cultures – one that’s very much worth exploring. What happens to us when we seek revenge, even when it’s “righteous” revenge and no one would really fault us for it. I get that – but I wonder what really makes someone like Bin Chea tick?”

“A theme I wanted to explore was the interaction of two completely different cultures, and there may not have been a better place to explore that than in Lowell. The hero, Sam Long, embraces the American culture completely, while others hang on to their Asian culture and view America with a mix of gratitude and trepidation. He and Bin Chea are both figments of my imagination. Comrade Bin also wants to leave his past behind. He made a lot of enemies in Cambodia, and he doesn’t want his past to catch up with him. As for the acts he committed in service of the Khmer Rouge, who can really explain them? There is a dark strain in human nature, and Bin Chea represents that.”

I can’t help but think “dark stain” is a tame euphemism for the maggots lurking in Comrade Bin’s soul. But of course Bob’s right, and Bin is not alone in history. “Did any Cambodians read your story? If so, how did they react? How did you feel, waiting for their reaction?”

“I don’t know of any Cambodians who have read Little Mountain, but a few had read an earlier story I had written, and they said I had it right. Of course, I had gotten a lot of specifics from them in the first place. My goal in any case is to tell a good story to American readers.”

“That you did. You prompted me to want to learn more about Cambodian history, the more I came to care what happened to Sam – I wanted to understand, even better, what drove him and turned him into the person he was – and how that same history could create creatures like Bin Chea and Viseth Kim. Speaking of Kim, there’s usually a great deal of respect, in the Asian community, for one’s elders – or so it seems, to outsiders. The sort of disrespect the Battboys – especially Viseth – showed the older generation, what do you think that stems from?”

“Respect for age is an important part of Asian culture, and by the way I don’t claim to be nearly expert on the subject. But I think that the Khmer Rouge horribly damaged the entire social structure of their country from 1975 to 1979, splitting and destroying countless families. They stripped parents, teachers, police of all authority and took it for themselves, so it’s little wonder that many survivors came to be leery of authority even in the United States. So I think a generation of children has come out of the refugee camps with some of the family traditions badly shaken–but hardly destroyed.

The Battboys, by the way, are a fiction. Since Battambang is the name of a Cambodian province, Battboys struck me as a good gang name.”

“Do you have any more novels in the works, Bob?”

“Yes, I have two others published already, all available at http://tinyurl.com/bobsanchezauthor. A fourth and fifth are in the works, and no two are alike.”

So, Bob, what do you do when you’re not writing novels?” I asked.

“I am active in the El Paso Writers’ League and write book reviews for Kirkus and for the Internet Review of Books. In the good weather, my wife and I like to explore the West in our RV.”

“That sounds like fun! When did you first know that you wanted to write?”

“The bug has been in my blood forever, but it didn’t really become a full-blown affliction until I became a technical writer in the mid-’80s.” I smiled – I, too, became a technical writer in the mid-1980s, and know what it’s like to meld the discipline of tech writing with a burning need to write fiction. Bob said, “I squirmed at the need to fit corporate writing styles, so in the evenings creative writing became my outlet. However, technical writing taught me a tremendous amount about craft.”

“Seems we have more than a few things in common, Bob. Your books are self-published, and you’ve said that you’re not actively pursuing publication through a traditional, royalty-paying publisher – though of course you’d consider it.

“Did I mention I had three agents over the years? They just never found publishers. In time, it just seemed that life is too short to spend months and years begging strangers to allow my work to be published.”

“What is your primary goal, as a novelist? Do you think you’ve achieved that?” I asked.

“My primary goal is to tell entertaining stories. I’d love to reach a critical mass of readers, whatever that is, so that my novels sell by word of mouth. I’m not there yet.”

“What is your NEXT goal?”

“To finish a novel about a priest who struggles with a moral dilemma.”

“You don’t tackle the easy ones, do you? I’ll look forward to reading that – and your other novels, now that I’ve had a taste in Little Mountain. Thanks, Bob!”

To learn more about author Bob Sanchez and his writing, please visit:

http://bobsanchez1.blogspot.com

http://tinyurl.com/bobsanchezauthor

Little Mountain, Big Mystery: Bob Sanchez Talks About Writing and His Next Goal is a post from: The Next Goal

About Holly Jahangiri

To Lose Weight, Lay Off the Endocannabinoids!

Holly Jahangiri — Fri, 16 Dec 2011 14:53:38 +0000

‘tis the season… of dietary regret. You might as well sign up with SparkPeople now (it’s free), because it’ll be good to have your program set up and your best-laid plans in place before the holidays. I’m not suggesting you avoid the Christmas cookies and the office parties and the booze – au contraire. If you have to be told that, this late in the game, just enjoy yourself and do penance in the New Year. Don’t bother making New Year’s Resolutions – just make a promise and commitment to yourself.

You know the Lay’s potato chip ad that says “You can’t eat just one”? Do you have certain foods that trigger an insatiable craving for more, more, MORE? According to at least one study, it’s the fat. Because fatty foods – get this – trigger the formation of “endocannabinoids” (yep, you read that right – cannabis-like substances manufactured in our own innards) that trigger, well, a bad case of “the munchies.”

Gives whole new meaning to the term “pot bellied,” doesn’t it?

Consider your “trigger foods.” These are the ones you taste and then can’t get enough of. I have a list – a blessedly short list – of foods that, when I’m serious about losing weight, I try to avoid at all costs. As you make your list, consider whether this fat-induced Mary Jane production is hindering your weight loss efforts.

Then again, if the holidays are stressing you out, maybe a pat of butter is just what you need to calm your nerves.

When I first started losing weight, bread was one of the things I cut out cold turkey. I like bread. I especially like bread with butter on it. One piece leads to two. Two leads to a sandwich. With cheese. But I can eliminate bread and not feel too deprived; if I don’t taste it – don’t think about it – I can live without it just fine. I don’t feel particularly “deprived.” I think of it with longing; I’m tempted. But…life goes on.

I joined SparkPeople in January 2006, all full of my starry-eyed, New Year’s resolution clean-slatedness and determination, and promptly forgot all about it. Later, determined and committed to success, I was able to put the program to good use – losing nearly 50 pounds.

Since then, I’ve quit smoking. I have a laundry list of excuses, if that won’t do – I mean, seriously, can anyone use “quit smoking” to justify gaining weight – for FIVE YEARS?? As in 2006, I recently renewed acquaintance with SparkPeople. "Oh, yeah, I remember this," I thought. I stepped on the scales. And once again, I weighed just about the same thing I had a year earlier. I browsed through some of the other members’ pages and saw their "before" and "after" shots. If I’d done what I’d said I was going to do, back in January, I’d be at my goal weight now. Instead, I’m right where I was…in January. Nothing has changed.

I look in the mirror and ask myself, once again: Self, do you want to be right where you are now, next year, at Christmas? Although the weight loss goals I’ve set for myself seem overwhelming, a quick mental calculation says they’re not at all unreasonable – and that in less than a year’s time, I can be downright svelte, just by losing 1-2 pounds a week.

The answer to my question, of course, was "no."

So, Self, when are you going to start working on this goal? If not now, when? I know I can do it – I’ve done it before. I know, without a doubt, that I can reach all the goals I’d set for myself. "The journey of 1000 miles begins with a single step," Confucious said.

"Just put one foot in front of the other, and keep moving," my mother often said.

Okay, starry-eyed Self, I muttered. Put back that stick of butter. There’s a good start.

Self and I have agreed to simply enjoy the holidays and get cracking on January 1 – it’s not procrastination, now, it’s a plan. Come the New Year, we’ll ride the wave of starry-eyed goal-setting optimism, only we’ll outlast and outshine ‘em all.

To Lose Weight, Lay Off the Endocannabinoids! is a post from: The Next Goal

About Holly Jahangiri

Overcoming Blogger’s Block

Holly Jahangiri — Wed, 14 Dec 2011 05:28:38 +0000

Odds are, blogging isn’t your day job – yet. And unless you’re independently wealthy, you won’t be quitting your day job any time soon. Blogging, for most of us, is either a personal journal, a creative outlet, a bully pulpit, or a dynamic, rich-media enhanced advertising platform for a non-blog-related business. Even for writers who blog, it can be hard to find topics, day in and day out, that are sure to interest readers. And nobody wants to be labeled “boring.”

So what can you do when you’re feeling uninspired? First, define your mission. I joke that my mission, with my personal blog, is to dominate the no-niche niche. How is it that the author of two children’s books ranks exceedingly well for the phrases “naegleria fowleri” and “brain munching amoeba”? It wasn’t because I set out to dominate the brain munching amoeba market, I can tell you that much! Let’s pretend, for a moment, that I am intent on promoting my children’s book, Trockle.

Second, figure out what the problem is. If a reader wanted to find a book just like Trockle, but didn’t know that Trockle existed, what might they be searching for? What problem does my product – my book – solve? I wrote Trockle because my son – aged five or six, maybe, at the time – was afraid of the monster he swore lurked under the bed. He wouldn’t sleep; he wouldn’t let me turn the lights off. So I figured if was going to lay awake in bed with the lights on, he could at least practice his reading skills. I went off to the other room and wrote a story about a little boy, just like my son – only the little monster under the bed was even more afraid of him. My son’s problem was “can’t sleep because there’s a monster under my bed.” Mine was, “how do I get my child to sleep when he thinks there’s a monster under the bed?”

Now, a search – the sort of thing that leads bloggers to care about “search engine optimization” and keyword ranking and all that other stuff – is basically a question. It’s often a really lazy question that doesn’t involve full sentences and doesn’t end with a question mark. Third grade teachers everywhere would cringe. So if a reader or a buyer wanted to solve this same problem – how do I help them find Trockle? What are the key words? How about fear, sleep, monsters, monster under the bed, help child sleep? That’s a good guess, but here’s where Google can help. Go to Google Insights – http://www.google.com/insights/search/ – and enter some of the key terms that came to your mind. Google Insights will give you an idea of what people are actually entering as search terms, if there are enough of them searching for a thing to display actual terms used. In this case, I entered “under the bed” and “monster + monsters” (+ meaning “or,” here, not “and”). What I learned was that there were almost no searches for “monster under the bed.” But there were plenty for “under my bed” and “monster under bed.”

That gives you your challenge: Write a post using those exact phrases. (We’re just playing at SEO, here – think of it as a writing prompt, not a marketing ploy, and have some fun with this.) It’s not too hard to work in “under my bed,” is it? But what about “monster under bed”? You just have to take those searches the way people enter them – and to a search engine, words like “the” or “a” or “an” are useless. You could try a line of dialogue:

Stephen’s face was as white as a newly-bleached sheet. He pointed at the floor. “Monster. Under. Bed.”

Mom sighed and pulled out the Febreze. “No monster can withstand my monster repellant!” she cried, and sprayed half the can under Stephen’s bed. The stench of dirty gym socks succumbed instantly. The monster, according to Stephen, was still there.

And now, it was hungry.

See, search engines also don’t care about punctuation. So you can take a little creative license and turn that awkward search phrase into something reasonable and readable, and Google sees it as exactly the same thing.

Maybe you don’t know the first thing about “search engine optimization,” and maybe you do but don’t care. But unlike in Field of Dreams, you cannot simply build a blog and expect readers to come. (I know – some of my writer friends are probably thinking, “Oh, geez, first I have to promote the book with a blog, and now you’re telling me I have to promote the blog, too? When will I find time to write?”) The good news is, writing begets writing – and practice makes perfect. Before long, you won’t have blogger’s block anymore.

Final Showdown!

If you like this post, please support my efforts to win the Surviving the Blog Contest by clicking the sharing buttons below: Like it on Facebook, give it a +1 on Google+, share it on LinkedIN, and (yes – AND) give a tweet on Twitter.

Overcoming Blogger’s Block is a post from: The Next Goal

About Holly Jahangiri

Being Human: Key to Business Success in Social Media

Holly Jahangiri — Mon, 12 Dec 2011 05:05:00 +0000

It must be something in the air. On Sunday, I was reading Melanie Kissell’s very honest and sensible post, “Not Afraid To Say I Disagree With Social Media Experts,” over on Weblogbetter.com, and I wanted to give her a high five. How disingenuous of any business to pretend that they are engaging in social media activities solely to have fun and make friends with their customers! It’s almost insulting to people’s intelligence, really. Melanie points out that for business owners, spending hours a day just being “social” is “pure, unadulterated rubbish.”

There’s a lot being said about “the role of social media,” but too often overlooked is the fact that “social media” is a natural outgrowth of people’s need to socialize with friends (not with brands and businesses) and share their perceptions and experiences of the world around them (and their opinion of those brands and businesses). Of course, we consumers want it all now – and we want it free (or cheap) and so, as with our favorite television stations, we need advertising sponsors to support our media habits.

And that all goes well, until the sponsors start raising the noise level, demanding more and more air time, and pretty soon an hour-long program is actually a 22-minute program interrupted at predictable intervals by commercials. Before we know it, we’ve got feminine hygiene products and condoms being touted during dinner hour. And in reaction, we grab the DVR remote to record our favorite shows and zip right through those ads. Except maybe the ads these companies produce to entertain us during the Super Bowl. But see – even there, they’ve tipped their hand and given us reason to expect that sort of quality all the time. We resent getting bombarded, constantly, with less than their best work.

Advertisers catch on, and we’ve got a problem – we hate the ads, but they’re not going to give us a free ride. Before long, there’s a strange sense that the relationship, once founded on mutually beneficial problem-solving, has turned adversarial. They’re playing in our playground, and they don’t really “get” us, but they keep the sandbox sandy and the swings in working order. Maybe, just maybe, we’d feel a little less sullen about it if they’d give us a push, or sit on the other side of the teeter-totter and give us a fair share of ups and downs, along with an occasional nod or a smile that says, “I see you – and I appreciate your business.”

As I said to Melanie, it pays to be sociable and friendly, to give as well as to receive, because people don’t like to buy from strangers they actively distrust, and there’s a lot of that out there. “Free samples” are a tried and true incentive to buy stuff. A business engages in social media to do more business – no one’s fooled into thinking their motives are anything other than that. There’s no ROI for businesses in “hanging out just to socialize.” But to give business an edge, in general, it helps to put a human face out there – people like to do business with real people, not faceless corporations they don’t like or trust. Too often, they invade the playground and then – in an attempt to make friends fast – they try sticking a rollercoaster up next to the sandbox. It makes too much noise; the other kids give up and go home in disgust.

Interesting that Seth Godin’s post, “The trap of social media noise,” touches on a similar theme, this week, in which he points out that “everyone is a marketer,” using social media as a soapbox from which to hawk their wares, always on the lookout for a louder megaphone. He talks about game theory and the choice of strategy: push the spam envelope in pursuit of critical mass, or focus and build a reputation as a thought leader doing worthwhile work. I know that I’ve felt pulled in both directions, lured by the bells and buzzers into chasing the numbers as if they were points for the win – but always, naturally, gravitate towards doing things the hard way. The high-touch, one customer at a time way. I can’t say that’s better than striving to reach critical mass, because my way is more likely to lead to repeat business than to high, quick turnaround profits. I think a healthy balance is called for. Because numbers alone have no personality, no soul, and no real influence. People matter – and if you don’t sincerely believe that, go chase the numbers. But if you do believe it, try listening at the edge of the sandbox first, before putting in a rollercoaster.

Final Showdown!

Being Human: Key to Business Success in Social Media is a post from: The Next Goal

About Holly Jahangiri

Practice Makes Perfect

Holly Jahangiri — Sat, 10 Dec 2011 04:58:00 +0000

No one is born knowing how to write, or how to play a musical instrument. Raw talent will only take a prodigy so far; even a child blessed with talent needs to hone his skills through training and practice. I often hear people lamenting an inability to write, and I think it’s not so much a lack of talent as it is a failure to develop skill through study and practice. They compare themselves to experienced, published authors who have practiced a lifetime – whose books also had benefit of good editors and book designers. At that point, they give up or begin to make excuses.

Too many people are easily frustrated if they are not able to perform with the skills of a seasoned player – be it in sports or music or any other endeavor, “straight out of the box.” It’s actually much more likely that someone lacking any special talent will learn and perfect their skills through practice, over time. And that requires patience and a willingness to fail, to fall, and to get back up and try again, repeatedly.

I know that when I played violin, in grade school, it sounded something like a sadist stepping on a cat that turned around and scratched the udders of an elephant cow. I gave it up. My daughter had more talent to begin with, but it wasn’t until she learned the value of diligent practice that her skill with the violin began to shine and take on a professional polish. She didn’t give up.

Sometimes, “giving up” is just an admission that we’re not all that interested in the pursuit in the first place. That’s okay – all the energy spent worrying about being labeled a “quitter” or feeling guilty over time not spent practicing is just counterproductive, then, and could be put to better use on other activities. Sometimes, “giving up” is only a fleeting urge that signals the need to do something else for a little while. When writer’s block strikes, for instance, I grab a camera and exercise other creative parts of my brain – I give the words a rest and communicate with my images.

“Giving up” on something we’re passionate about – feeling that empty, sorrowful place inside that will one day house regret – that usually stems from a lack of self-confidence and a fear of failure. There are no shortcuts to success. All the time spent bemoaning one’s inability to do a thing could better be spent learning to do it, but fear of failure – fear of looking foolish – too often holds us back.

Be willing to try, and try, and try again. That’s the only way to succeed.

Practice Makes Perfect is a post from: The Next Goal

About Holly Jahangiri

Keep Your Eye on the Goal

Holly Jahangiri — Sat, 10 Dec 2011 04:49:40 +0000

The story of the princess Atalanta, daughter of King Iasus, demonstrates that women can be every bit the accomplished athlete, fierce hunter, and strong warrior as any man – in spite of the fact that her father, who wanted a son, left her on a mountain to die. She vowed to remain a virgin, dedicated herself to the goddess Artemis, and proved repeatedly that she was as good a fighter as any man. Given the number of men (and centaurs) who lusted after Atalanta, once can only assume she was also beautiful. That, or men really do love an impossible challenge.

At some point, King Iasus (who, surprisingly, was reunited with his daughter and emerged unscathed) decided that Atalanta ought to marry. The clever Atalanta agreed, but only if the suitor could outrun her in a race. Any who tried and lost would be killed. Seems harsh, but presumably it discouraged the less determined suitors. Still, a fair number of fools tried. And lost their lives in the attempt. You know it wasn’t the fair Atalanta whose charms provoked them to enter the race – they really believed they could best her in the race. Hyped on testosterone and adrenaline, they gave it their all – she was just the prize. It was the thrill of the chase that suckered them in and sent them rushing headlong to their doom.

But one young man, Hippomenes, was cleverer than most. He had an edge. Though he was not the fastest, he was, apparently, the cutest – or at least the goddess Aphrodite thought so. She gave him three golden apples with which to distract the swift and deadly runner, Atalanta. The goddess of love was probably a bit tired, too, of watching so much slaughter in the name of love, and also wanted Atalanta to settle down, marry, have a few kids, mellow out, and stop killing the boys for chasing her.

But here’s the thing: Had Atalanta not been distracted by the next “pretty, shiny” apple tossed at her by the handsome Hippomenes, she might have remained free and true to her vows to Artemis, and would not have gone on to anger Zeus and get herself turned into a lioness. But no – she took her eye off the goal and let Hippomenes pass her up to win the race. Honor demanded that she marry him (and he was awfully cute, you know, to have won the favor of the goddess Aphrodite).

Now that I think about it, it might be worth pausing to look at the pretty, shiny things along the way. If they are truly more attractive than the prize you’ve set your sights on, perhaps there’s a reason for that, too. Life send many opportunities our way; it pays to be alert to them all.

Keep Your Eye on the Goal is a post from: The Next Goal

About Holly Jahangiri

Character of a Winner: Reverent

Holly Jahangiri — Sat, 10 Dec 2011 02:46:42 +0000

What does it mean to be “reverent”? If you said that it means you must be a good, church-going Christian, you’re wrong.

rev·er·ence (rvr-ns)

n.

1. A feeling of profound awe and respect and often love; veneration. See Synonyms at honor.

2. An act showing respect, especially a bow or curtsy.

3. The state of being revered.

4. Reverence Used as a form of address for certain members of the Christian clergy: Your Reverence.

tr.v. rev·er·enced, rev·er·enc·ing, rev·er·enc·es

To consider or treat with profound awe and respect; venerate.

rever·enc·er n.

The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition copyright ©2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Updated in 2009. Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

To be faithful to the principles of religious doctrine, one must revere a spiritual power greater than himself. But it is possible to be reverent – deeply respectful of and loving towards – other people, principles, and things. Have you ever sat in a darkened amphitheater and felt sheer awe at the music played by a symphonic orchestra? Have you ever watched the red brick sky glowing in the dusk before a hurricane? Have you ever watched seen pictures of Mother Theresa ministering to the sick and poor, or of Gandhi setting an example to the world of peaceful resistance to injustice? All of those things inspire reference.

To be successful, we must recognize and revere those who have laid the groundwork for our accomplishments: the scientists, philosophers, politicians, and others who shaped the world before our birth; our parents, who gave us life; our many teachers, who generously shared their knowledge and taught us how to slake our own thirst for it; our friends, who mirrored us and showed us what we wanted to be and not to be; our colleagues who mentored us; our children, who humbled us and taught us what matters and what doesn’t, ultimately.

Recognizing the contributions of others, and working hard to lay the foundation for future generations’ success, is part of the notion of “paying one’s dues.” Give reverence before seeking to be revered.

To be reverent is to be humble; it is to recognize that we are not the center of the universe. But it is also to see the world with childlike eyes – to marvel at a rainbow. To gasp in awe at a cathedral, to contemplate what human minds can conceive, human hands and sweat can produce. It is to marvel at the brilliance of scientific innovation in service of humanity. Watch this and see if it doesn’t inspire reverence:

Character of a Winner: Reverent is a post from: The Next Goal

About Holly Jahangiri

Character of a Winner: Clean

Holly Jahangiri — Sat, 10 Dec 2011 01:59:07 +0000

Clean

Keeping your body, home, car, and office clean is important to good physical and mental health, as well as to your overall productivity. Keeping your mind clean is also important for your spiritual health and relationships.

Along with the 8 Tips to Get in Fighting Shape that I shared at the start of this blog, it’s important – especially now, in the middle of flu season, to avoid germs and stay healthy. Now, having said that, I wouldn’t advise getting obsessive about it. I once relayed, to my kids’ pediatrician, my mom’s advice about the importance of letting your kids “eat their pound of dirt” to develop healthy immune systems. I was mostly joking. The doctor, however, nodded and agreed it wasn’t a bad idea.

Maybe more importantly, keep your cell phone clean. Even there, it doesn’t pay to go overboard – maybe a quick swab of the surface with an alcohol wipe would be good, but you wouldn’t dunk it under the tap for a surgical scrub and expect it to do its job. Speaking of giving things a surgical scrub, it’s easy to remember how long to wash your hands: Just sing two verses of “Happy Birthday” while you scrub. Ignore the funny looks from the guy next to you.

Appearances count; keep the clothes clean and neat, as well. Would you show up for a job interview in a wrinkled shirt and torn jeans? Would you show up for a date, reeking of a hard run?

How about your car? If it’s full of clutter, how can you give your manager or coworker a ride to the airport?

Clutter in our immediate environment or workspace can translate into less productivity. You can employ the 5S methodology to tackle the problem right away: seiri (sorting), seiton (straightening or setting in order), seiso (sweeping, shining, or systematic cleaning), seiketsu (standardizing) and shitsuke (sustaining or self discipline). In short, eliminate the non-essentials; follow the old adage, “a place for everything, and everything in its place”; sweep and shine on a regular basis – don’t let dust, dirt, or grime accumulate; define responsibilities and processes; monitor and maintain the improvements so there’s no backsliding.

I say if I can close my eyes and lay hands on a pen and a blank sheet of paper, I’m good to go. My husband, the Six Sigma Black Belt, is only mildly amused.

It’s important to keep your mind clean, too. Again, a few cobwebs, a dustbunny, and the occasional smudge never hurt a brain. It’s okay to enjoy a naughty joke. It ceases to be okay when the joke is less funny than it is derogatory, bigoted, racist, sexist, or held afloat by an undercurrent of hate. I mean, I’m blond and I have a law degree – I know all the best jokes. I also know a few that are pure misogyny and libel. It shouldn’t be that hard to tell the difference, but as I tell my son, best keep them to yourself if you are still struggling with that concept. Developing empathy can help. Imagine, for a moment, that you are the subject of your thoughts, your jokes, your snide comments. How would you feel, honestly? Don’t just say, “I’d think it was funny!” – really consider if you would, or whether you’d be laughing to cover up the hurt, embarrassment, and resentment.

Don’t be that person – the one who causes just one tiny bit more pain in the world for no reason better than an awkward, uncomfortable chuckle.

Character of a Winner: Clean is a post from: The Next Goal