tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-77537552012-04-16T00:56:22.106+01:00The question is not, 'Why are you wearing a tiger costume?' The question is, 'Why aren't YOU wearing a tiger costume?'Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.comBlogger825125This is an XML content feed. It is intended to be viewed in a newsreader or syndicated to another site, subject to copyright and fair use.tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1144565083273759162006-04-09T07:33:00.000+01:002006-04-09T07:44:43.290+01:00

Proof, if that's the sort of thing you're after, that what was once a subcultural phenomenon has well and truly become mainstream: when your Dad emails you to tell you he's started his own blog. Here it is:http://talkingsnake.blogspot.comHaving only glanced at it at two in the morning I can already tell you that it's a blog with a purpose, and therefore immediately more worthwhile than, for

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1144507564565349682006-04-08T15:42:00.000+01:002006-04-08T15:46:32.813+01:00

A linkstravaganza.Firstly, let there be sphreric lounge, a huge and German ambient electronica resource I just happened to happen upon this morning.Second, let there be Blog Mad, another another another blog directory-search engine-surf exchange for those of us who just can't stop publicising our wonderful selves.Third, let there be Parkour, for the adventurous and wreckless.4. Let there be the

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1144022576628171532006-04-03T00:37:00.000+01:002006-04-03T07:52:23.046+01:00

Now then: if this shouldn't be the standard form used to determine a person's overall worth, and in fact their very personality, I don't know what should. I love question 11. It could have so many meanings.Yes, noise. Creaking, whistling, cracking, blowing, flowing, slopping, pouring, echoing, building, fizzing, popping, dropping...I find that these days, the first thing I do when I come home

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1143869689596249112006-04-01T06:30:00.000+01:002006-04-01T06:34:49.613+01:00

On April Fool's Day, can you trust the weather? Last night I slept naked and with the window open, enjoying the ambience of the rain with all my senses. Nobody has actually tried to convince me of the quality of flowers; I have received ridicule and incredulity only. Whohar.The solution, as I see it, is to eat a hearty breakfast, have a shower and put on a nice, clean shirt and a comfortable

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1143836741221637492006-03-31T21:23:00.000+01:002006-03-31T21:25:41.583+01:00

This picture gives me hundreds of reasons to go on living.This picture is proof that existence and the universe are fundamentally good.This picture makes me so happy I want to wet all of my pants at once.

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1143826805956622362006-03-31T18:28:00.000+01:002006-03-31T19:10:45.626+01:00

Yes, amid a flurry of fantastical advertising featuring babies dressed as all your favourite "alternative" and "indie" stars like the Gallagher Brothers, Meg and Jack White, Franz Ferdinand and that fat band who walked off Top of the Pops for being called fat, XFM Manchester was launched today. Or maybe it earlier this week. Recently, anyway.This is obviously a good thing for popular music,

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1143796131079916222006-03-31T10:03:00.000+01:002006-03-31T10:08:51.166+01:00

On my way home the other night from wherever it was I was, I passed a bus stop, one of those shelters that seem to have been built not, primarily, to keep people dry while waiting for the bus, but rather to maximize public advertising space. (Because of course, when you're waiting for the last bus home in the pouring rain after 18 hours of urban experience, what you really want is to breathe a

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1143646342679179302006-03-29T16:28:00.000+01:002006-03-29T16:32:22.683+01:00

You might think I'm living proof that romance is dead.You might think I'm a heartless urbanite who's lost all sense of awe at the beauty of nature.You might think I'm just your typical man who refuses to get in touch with his feelings.Well, you're wrong.But I can't lie about this: I just think that flowers are overrated.

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1143574508055986772006-03-28T20:31:00.000+01:002006-03-28T20:41:38.556+01:00

click thisand thisNow this will make more sense. Relatively speaking:Me:Hello GodGod:Hello child. What is your name?Me:Jonny. We spoke yesterdayGod: It's good to see you, Jonny. Of course I remember you well Jonny. We were talking about .Me:about what?God:What about what?Me:what about what about what?God:what about what? I haven't heard enough about it to have an opinion.Me:Never mind. I

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1143500722993901922006-03-27T23:43:00.000+01:002006-03-28T00:14:13.323+01:00

It would be whimsical of me to 'review' V for Vendetta in any conventional sense: all that really needs to be said about it is that when Natalie Portman asked Stephen Fry, "Is everything a joke to you?" and he replied, "Only the things that matter", it instantly hit me that there, if such a thing were ever possible, was, in a single phrase, my entire philosophy of life.And that any film which

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1143408581950537642006-03-26T22:26:00.000+01:002006-03-26T22:29:41.966+01:00

Go here if you feel like talking directly to God. I did, but I soon started to have my doubts I was actually talking to the all-knowing creator of the universe. Here's what happened:Me: Hello?God:Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?Me: My name's JonnyGod: I am always glad to make new friends, Jonny.Me: But I thought you were God. Don't you already know who I am?God:Are you doubting me?

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1143316920719348082006-03-25T20:00:00.000Z2006-03-25T20:09:36.916Z

RossRossRossRoss! Yes, Ross is back to blog another day or month. Who cares? You should. Link to him, comment on him, applaud him, help him with his HTML, stand in awe of him. His blog has only one post, it's pink, and already it's better than yours. And, a graduate of the English language, he can't use "it's" and "its" correctly. And even then, it's still better than yours. So curl up

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1143151740157980222006-03-23T22:06:00.000Z2006-03-23T22:09:00.180Z

I defy all of you not to have hours and hours of fun with THIS.I defy all of you not to have hours and hours of fun.I defy all of you not to have fun.I defy all of you.I defy all.

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1143132965102325472006-03-23T16:50:00.000Z2006-03-23T16:57:47.826Z

Thanks to the wonder of technology, it is now possible to talk to me. Free. You can pay me if you want, of course, but that won't be necessary. My laptop has now become a telephone. That doesn't mean that if you call it, I'll answer. But it does mean that I might. See my sidebar.

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1142929258298733872006-03-21T08:15:00.000Z2006-03-21T18:15:36.670Z

On 4th February 1912, Austrian tailor Franz Reichelt, dressed in a ridiculous overcoat/parachute of his own design, jumped off the Eiffel Tower in an attempt to fly or, failing that, float to the ground with at least some degree of grace and without sustaining serious injury. He failed, and fell swiftly to his death. You can view highlights from the last few moments of his absurd existence by

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1142872500100506512006-03-20T16:25:00.000Z2006-03-20T16:38:08.176Z

Those of you who have ever been to the charming isle of Iona will know just how tiny it is. How remote, how quaint, mysterious, ancient and delicious. It's an island off a larger island, Mull, which is itself an island off a much larger island, Britain.You'll also probably know that's it's one of the spots where Christianity first found its mischievous little way to this part of the world,

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1142792306151396522006-03-19T18:14:00.000Z2006-03-19T18:19:38.673Z

It is my correct opinion that The Books are one of the greatest bands of this decade. I just can't stop listening to their ridiculously superb album, 'Lost and Safe'. I can't. Not that I've tried: why would I want to? But it's really very important that everyone who values me as a friend and themselves as a person find some way of listening to it, even if that means the frightfully quaint way

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1142718324768824862006-03-18T21:43:00.000Z2006-03-18T21:50:07.290Z

Yes, what could possibly be more wonderful than travelling at astonishing speeds in a comfortable, luxury train at the cutting edge of technology, the Intercity 125? As Jimmy Saville himself explains, this truly is "the age of the train".And as the Sinclair Spectrum ZX+ explains, it's time to enter the world of 8bit gaming!They're only about 2.5MB each, download them. Nothing could provide

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1142676781868054732006-03-18T10:11:00.000Z2006-03-18T10:13:01.883Z

What an exquisite pleasure it is to see Kieran blogging again. His blog is better than yours and, not infrequently, better than mine.

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1142478850052705632006-03-16T03:11:00.000Z2006-03-16T03:14:10.070Z

Turns out someone who was in the same year as me at school, whose bottom was no longer really than yours or mine, is now an academic electro-acoustic-ambient-abstract musician in Leeds. This is unexpected, but then, what isn't?www.adamlongbottom.co.uk

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1142364551521981282006-03-14T19:10:00.000Z2006-03-14T19:32:09.266Z

Well, kids, it's list day.And here is my list. By popular demand.1. Everything you do, say and think is so interesting and important that millions of people you have no connection with whatsoever are just dying to read all about it.2. You're a failed/frustrated/out-of-work/retired/incompetent/delusional journalist/novelist/salesman/philosopher/social critic/cult leader.3. Finally, as you sit

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1142101592001308922006-03-11T18:26:00.000Z2006-03-11T18:26:32.060Z

For reasons not entirely clear to me, and which therefore I obviously welcomed, at 3:30 this afternoon two small children were standing on my desk drawing willies on the whiteboard.  Hyperactive and inquisitive, as all the best children are, they asked me every question that could be asked that begins with the words, "what's this?"  I gave them answers, paper, pencils and highlighter pens, they

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1141932068332671522006-03-09T19:21:00.000Z2006-03-09T19:21:08.403Z

 We say "everyone is equal" despite many obvious reasons to believe this isn't true.  Some people are clearly and undeniably great.  Some people aren't.  Oscar Schindler was not equal to Adolf Hitler.  James Blunt is not equal to Morrissey.  Most individuals are simply average, and none of us are entirely identical. What we mean by saying that everyone is equal is that everyone should be treated

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1141715147017700542006-03-07T07:04:00.000Z2006-03-07T07:05:47.033Z

Today, I demand that you use the phrase, "all of a sudden" at least once in your communications with your fellow human beings. Because it's a good phrase and should be used more often. Your king has spoken.

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7753755.post-1141679494332135902006-03-06T21:06:00.000Z2006-03-06T21:15:05.856Z

Receptionist: "OK, what's your name again? Jonathan...Swift?"Me: "No, he wrote Gulliver's Travels. It's Bradshaw".Receptionist: (laughing) "Oh yes, I'll call you a taxi then. Take a seat".I wonder whether Jonathan Swift ever got mistaken for me. And if a taxi from the future arrived to pick up Jonathan Swift, he'd get in it. And what it would be like to discover that I actually wrote

Jonny Opinionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13979919244691263426noreply@blogger.com2