The Park Wife

The Big Bloggity Move of 2012

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Tue, 19 Jun 2012 13:50:00 +0000

After five years of blogging, I am finally going to put on my big girl pants! Woohoooooo, yes, hop on over to www.theparkwife.com.

Parenting Advice, Yep, I Went There

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Mon, 04 Jun 2012 15:37:00 +0000

I am often told when we are out and about in public that our boys are so well-behaved. I smile and thank the nice, half-blind folks while in my mind I am thinking "sweet mercy, they have to be, I am with them ALL THE TIME!"

It is all about mom sanity people. Alright, I joke, but as a homeschool mom I have found that there are times I go into survival mode parenting, but if I tip the scale with most of the time trying to actively, intentionally parent, the results are much better.

I have had young mothers call me and after telling me their latest kiddo predicament they ask what I think they should do. Parenting advice, oh, a slippery slope my friends.

I really do not like to give mom advice for several reasons:
1- It is always in the back of my mind that as soon as I do, our boys will lose their minds and start a UFC fight in the toy isle of Walmart that ends up on YouTube.

2- They think my advice is a great idea in theory, but the follow through and diligence to be consistent is just too hard, and
3- When it does not work for them, I turn into the bad guy, yep, I will be judged, yes ma'am, you know how it works, mom judgment helps to make us feel better about ourselves.

But, after much persistence on their part, I give in (I know, I know, I should know better), and try in my nicest way to give them advice and encouragement knowing that what I am telling them is the hard thing to do, but will yield best results.

Yes, I know that sometimes letting them watch Star Wars for the 3rd time that week is easier than playing one more game of Scrabble with a first grader who has limited spelling skills, oh and don't get me started on Candyland. But, I do know that easy does not equal the best in life, that mentality results in a generation that has a deeply embedded sense of entitlement and narcissism .

So, here I go, on my blog, for the world to see and judge, some The Park Wife parenting advice (oh, help you now if it is that bad).

I think that teaching our children is about relationship building, spending time with them so we can learn about them and guide them. Oh, sounds easy, right? I had one very honest mother tell me "I really do not want to be around my kids, they drive me crazy whining, complaining, and fighting all the time." Another who I just met has completely overscheduled her kids and her commitments in an effort to "expose" them to life and make sure they are appropriately socialized, but her home and marriage are falling apart because she spends her days in her car. Her kids are very disrespectful and often make comments about how they are so tired of going from here to there all day long.

A few tips on building a relationship:
Pray, Pray, Pray: I ask for wisdom and guidance regularly, like 342 times a day.

Consistent parenting: That means you have to be reliable, dependable, and constant. That is hard in any part of life, but you only get one chance raising your children. DO NOT beat yourself up when you don't get it right, just try to do better the next day.

Light up: Every morning when we see each other for the first time, I make sure my eyes light up (even if I have not had my first cup of coffee), tell them good morning, and how happy I am to see them. I try hard to stop and listen, really listen to them, even when it is the third time they tell me a story about dinosaurs.

Family Time: We eat dinner together every night. That might not be feasible for everyone, but make a goal of how many times this week you can sit and regroup over a meal together and make it happen.

Be silly and have fun: Dance in the kitchen, make up silly songs, play freeze tag, make a tent in the living room with sheets and get in it with them and color, make wonderful memories, this is what they will remember about their childhood (I hope). The greatest sound in our home is our children laughing, we do what we can to make them do that as much as possible.

Marriage Focus: We put our boys to bed at 8:00 every night. They can read or draw for a while, but at that point it is Big Buckaroo and my time. The greatest gift we can give our kids (and ourselves) is to become citizens of honor and loyalty in our own marriages. That way, our kids can grow up with a model of what marriage can be. And that no, they are not the center of the universe.

We want a relationship with our boys that makes it easy for them to come to us with questions and concerns. We need a relationship where there's not just respect, but also love. This kind of parent-child bond doesn't just happen; it takes wisdom and intentional effort. I am not perfect with this, I fail often, but I get up, dust myself off, and try to do the best I can for much is at stake.

Good luck, and if it does not work, just blame me,

The Park Wife

We Lost the Farm

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Tue, 29 May 2012 13:28:00 +0000

At our old state park, we had a lot of land around our house which made it possible to grow a lot of veggies (enough to start a farmers' market), run some pastured poultry (for healthy, non-medicated chicken), laying hens for delicious eggs, pastured pigs (hello, bacon!), and pets for the boys to learn some hands-on animal husbandry (and outdoor chores that built strong muscles, work ethic, and character).

Hello beautiful!

I smell bacon....bacon, bacon, bacon!!!!!
Alright they did not smell that good.

Let me out!!! Ready to be let out for the day,
this is as confined as our chicks got.

Oh, and then there were the pets.

Huck and Tom

Tonto and Lucky (aka the hog and the dog)

Littlest Buckaroo's rabbit. His name changed daily.
Poor thing had an identity crisis and left for the loony bin.

The 4-H Show Goats- Hiccup and Astrid

The day Uncle Bob brought them a horse, yes, a horse named Bucky.

Then...... we moved. And we got a fish.

The feed cost for animals at our house drastically reduced. All was well in our new world. A nice break from chores, finding someone to feed and water the animals when we went to our cabin, and everything else that comes along with pets and livestock living around your home.

Then, motherless Fluffy came into our lives.

We (meaning me, moms end up doing most animal baby things) bottle fed her and although I am sure she misses her mommy, she has two little boys that love her.

I said no animals for the first year at our new house (aside of the nameless fish), but your blue eyes and sweet cuddles won me over. So, welcome to the family Fluffy.

First time cat owner,
The Park Wife

Shopping at Farmers' Markets

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Fri, 25 May 2012 16:25:00 +0000

It is Farmers' Market Season! Hop over to Arkansas Women Bloggers and read my post on shopping at farmers' markets.

Buy fresh, buy local and buy in season,
The Park Wife

Our Southern Gentlemen

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Thu, 24 May 2012 19:14:00 +0000

Are Gentlemen on the endangered species list? Oh, sweet mint julep, I hope not, it would mess up my whole Southern Belle dreamworld.

We are trying to teach our boys about being courteous and kind. Courtesies don't cost anything, but they are priceless ways of showing respect and making others feel special and valued in what has become a selfish and self-centered culture.

I think manners are both "caught" and "taught" as children observe mom and dad showing courtesy and expressing thankfulness to each other. As mothers, we need to slow down and allow our husband to pull out our chair for us at dinner and wait a few extra seconds for him to walk around the car and get the door. Good grief, this is hard for me sometimes, I am usually running late and am dashing out of the car to our destination. But, then I remember, our sons are watching.

It is often said that "the way a boy treats his mother is the way that he'll treat his wife." And, I want my daughter-in-law to like me so I am working hard now to prepare our boys to be men. Real men.

I saw this yesterday and just LOVE it!

Head over to DapperPaper on Etsy, I think all moms of boys need one of these on the wall at their house.

Who is your favorite Southern Gent? I would love to know! I have one (aside of Big Buckaroo), can you guess? No, it is not a character from Gone With the Wind.

Bless your heart,
The Park Wife

Farmers' Market Withdrawal

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Wed, 23 May 2012 14:23:00 +0000

I love fresh, local food and have been a huge advocate for the local food movement for the past 5 years. I was on our state's farmers' market board, started and managed markets in two towns, and helped several other communities start markets. I grew produce to sell at these markets in my own little garden world. I speak at farmers' conferences in an effort to help them market and promote their businesses more effectively.

At market,
I traded produce with farmers who grew things I did not,

planned events from music to a children's garden,

met and became friends with some of the best, most down to earth people you will ever meet. Yes, farmers.

Little Buckaroo selling his eggs
to his best customer, Ms. Margaret.

I taught the Buckaroo's first-hand where their food comes from and how to sell what they grow and their chicken's eggs (we call that consumer math in homeschooling).

Then, we moved. I love our new town and our new home. But, I lost my farming for market capabilities due to the lack of land.

So, I am making do. I planted some vegetables outside of the state park restaurant for them to use, I will buy from the market here in our new town, and am getting creative with what I have to work with (yes, flower beds). However, I am still in Farmers' Market withdrawal. Getting up at 5 a.m. on Saturday's was rough, but once the opening bell rang at market, it was all worth it. The Buckaroo's with hands and face covered in blueberry stains, juice from beautiful, tasty heirloom tomato's dripping on our shirts, Ms. Crews sharing her pickle recipe with me. Sweet mercy, I need a local farmer to adopt me.

We are working to build our sustainable agriculture farm for when Big Buckaroo retires (um... about 15 more years), but until then..... farewell,

Until we meet again.

Alright, I know in reality I will be all up in the local food movement, just not as an active farmer.

Go out and support your local farmers at the market,
The Park Wife
formerly known as the Southern Belle Farm Chick

I'm With the Band

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Tue, 08 May 2012 14:05:00 +0000

As I have told you before, we live in a very musical town. Yes, hard for a gal who can only play the radio, but the Buckaroo's have taken to it like Charlie Daniel's to the fiddle.

One of the many wonderful things happening in our town is a program called Music Roots where skilled instructors provide youth from 4th to 8th grade with classes in traditional folk instruments: guitar, banjo, autoharp and fiddle for FREE!!!! Classes are held during the school day to ensure participation and each student is provided a quality instrument. Yes, re-read that. What an amazing thing that our community is doing to pass on the love of music to the next generation.

It is extraordinary, not only is our town and several organizations (including our state park) committed to it, but I have seen people who come into town and stay a few months to play music or even just for a weekend festival and before they leave they buy instruments for these kids, known as their "forever instruments" (I am learning the lingo).

Last night, they had their end of the year concert and the Buckaroo's music teacher, Mrs. Shay, invited them to be a part of it (they are not old enough for the program yet). Oh, and they have only had lessons for 3 1/2 months. Yes, Mrs. Shay is a brave soul.

So, without further ado, the 4th grade banjo players and the Buckaroos. Little Buckaroo on fiddle and Littlest Buckaroo on clawhammer banjo (they sing the first two verses in case you do not know which ones they are).

Thankful and blessed to be a part of a community that supports our young people this much.

Going to get the music for The Devil Went Down to Georgia for Little Buckaroo,

The Park Wife

Oh, thank you you tube for the inappropriate thumbnails that come up after the video, ughhhh.

Controlling the Worrywart in Me

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Mon, 07 May 2012 14:18:00 +0000

Worrying does not empty tomorrow of its troubles. It empties today of it’s strength. -Mary Engelbreit.

Last weekend, Big Buckaroo sent me away to the city for a weekend with my dear friend Jennifer. It was definitely time for a mom break, really, I adore my children, but I am with them 24/7. Plus it was my birthday weekend, wooohoooo, watch out Little Rock, two homeschooling, park wives are on the loose. O.K., in reality, good food, a movie that does not involve Disney characters, and some fun shopping was on the agenda, but we did it with flair.

Running away does not happen often, not because Big Buckaroo does not offer, but because I always feel mom guilt and worry as I plan it. Yes, sistah friends, I worry about crazy things. Such as, what if I have a wreck, who will take care of the boys, oh, and no one could ever love Big Buckaroo as much as I love him, I will never meet my grandchildren....... the list goes on..... and on....

Can I blame this on my worry wart mother? She raised five boys and myself, believe me she had and still has a lot of reasons to worry. Is it in my DNA? Have I always been like this?

Or, did this just happen the day I found out I was pregnant? You know the drill, you are so excited to see the two pink lines, then you start freaking out over the glass of red wine you had two nights prior and then you start thinking about how your irrational fondness for chocolate covered donuts is going to effect that little angel growing inside of you. Maybe worrying is just in the job description of a mom, right up there with providing food and buying cute footie pajamas with dinosaurs all over them.

There are many things in my life in which I need encouragement, but worry, nope, not one of them. But, worrying is so worrisome, it is completely stressful just to worry. In my sane moments, I know it is the flip side of joy, pride, and fulfillment.

So, today, I am going to make a conscious effort to stop worrying about these things. Alright, I am going to at least try, I have to start somewhere. If I am not successful, I will just worry about not succeeding at stopping my worry. I know, it is a tangled web I weave.

Anyway....... today I will make an effort not worry about:

1- Everything I am doing wrong. I do not personally know any perfect people, but I know many who worry about being perfect. Hand raised. That's me. I could exercise religiously (o.k. that might be a stretch), serve my family the purest organic diet, lift my husband up so high he could grab the flag off the moon and make sure the boys know Latin by age 10, but, I would still worry that I am not doing enough or doing it "right". Of course, there are plenty of people who want to make sure I know I am not doing it "right". I will draw some boundaries and I will not let them in my life. Yes, I might have to unfriend some people on Facebook who always have status updates that are negative, judgmental, and whining about life.

*I am going to stop worrying about perfection and not let the judgmental, negative people in my life.

2- What others think of me. This is a hard one for my people pleasing self. I learned this early, I discovered that feeling important and feeling accepted was a nice experience and so I learned to do everything I could to make other people like me. I didn’t want to be singled out by the crowd for being different because this was not such a nice feeling (mean girls suck). I learned this way of being so well that, as an adult, I continue – mostly through mutual peer pressure – to make sure everyone likes me.

* It is all an illusion, I cannot control what other people think. People have their own agenda, they come with their own baggage and, in the end, they are more interested in themselves than in me.

3- What I think of myself (yep, lines on my face, hips, behind, etc). - Do I need to exercise and lose weight, um yeah, but I need to focus on that for my health rather than hoping everyone that sees my outward appearance thinks I am "put together" or pretty. In my minds eye, I am still an athlete that walks into the room and gets attention, in reality, I am 41 and a little more than voluptuous. Full length mirrors are of the devil. Thankfully, I have boys and the ten bazillion ads that we see promoting an air brushed, unattainable beauty will not effect them to the degree it does girls, but I do want to raise young men who are secure in themselves without being cocky or conceited....nor feeling like an ugly duckling in a beauty obsessed world. I must pass on that acceptance of self to them, but I must first do it for myself. It will be a great gift I give them and myself.

*Instead of obsessing over my own appearance, I will notice and mention beautiful things (not external) about everyone else. And, I will make sure our boys know that a beautiful soul is more important than outer beauty.

Don't worry, be happy!
The Park Wife

^{Matthew 6:25-27}“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? ²⁶Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? ²⁷Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?"

Plan Your Arkansas Vacation

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Thu, 15 Mar 2012 19:29:00 +0000

Have you picked up the 2012 Arkansas State Parks Guide?

Grab one, plan your vacation and then let me know what state park you are visiting and when. We might just run into each other.

There are 52 parks to choose from with diverse landscapes, natural and cultural resources, park facilities, and programs. Yes, I have some favorites, if you want recommendations of where to go and when, I can help you out. Just call me the Arkansas Kiplinger Gal or your Travel & Leisure Liaison, well, in reality my life is more of a Travel Zoo kind of existence. At least I don't live on Lonely Planet (I can not even go to the bathroom without someone calling for me, lonely I am not, thankfully). Alright, I am done.

Oh, cool, I know that family on the cover of the guide.

Get outside and enjoy!

Your Trip Advisor,
The Park Wife

Watch Out Clapton

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Wed, 07 Mar 2012 23:45:00 +0000

Musical talent? Um... I play the radio, that is about it. I thought I sang pretty well in the shower, then I married Big Buckaroo and he squashed my dreams of being the next Beyonce (plus, my hips don't move like hers). Yes, he confirmed what my mom tried so nicely to tell me as a child, I am completely tone deaf with no musical ability whatsoever. Nope, I will not be headlining at a karaoke bar anytime soon.

Growing up, I was a cheerleader, gymnast, took dance classes, and let's not forget those two horrendous pageants that I entered (thankfully, we did not put in fake teeth, hair extensions, nor did I wear more make-up on my face than clothes on my body, I guess you get that I am not a big fan of Toddlers and Tiaras). Plus, I played some sports, so music and band did not make it on my completely over-scheduled calendar. Yes, I blame my mother, no really, I am sure she knew early that was not my niche.

Now.....we have moved to a town totally focused on music, yep, fish out of water, but, I am rolling with it. The Buckaroo's decided to try playing an instrument, I am all about introducing them to new things to see if they like it (the kale chips did not go over too well, win some, you lose some). Little Buckaroo decided on the fiddle, so I took him for a first lesson, kaboom, the boy picked it up and loves it. Littlest Buckaroo, who spends his days working on training for Marine Corp boot camp, yes, he is 6 and can do more pull ups than me, said he did not want to take lessons. Then, he saw a banjo and thought it was sort of a guitar and a drum... a drum, huh, he rethought his position and is now playing clawhammer banjo.

Then, hold on to your hats, someone told Little Buckaroo that you can not live in this town and not play an instrument, sweet mercy he took it literally. He was afraid they would make me move since I can not even play Name That Tune.

Mrs. Shay is the boys extraordinary music teacher who the Buckaroo's adore. She does not want me to have to move out of the city limits without my family and does not believe the impossibility of me being the next Eric Clapton (o.k. she really does know that is not going to happen), so she is forcing me to learn a few chords on the guitar. I laughed at her for a few weeks and then gave in to "learning just a few chords". Aside of it hurting my fingertips, it is pretty cool.

So, maybe you will see me headlining somewhere in the future, it will probably be at a senior living center since by the time I learn a song or two that is where I will be living.

I should probably just play Guitar Hero,
The Park Wife

The Gypsy in Me

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Mon, 27 Feb 2012 15:35:00 +0000

Growing up in Meridian, MS, I heard many tales of a band of gypsies that had traveled there to bury their Queen. In 1915, the sudden death of beloved Gypsy Queen Callie (Kelly) Mitchell brought an estimated 20,000 people to my small southern hometown to attend her funeral and burial.

After birthing 15 babies, I am not sure
Queen Kelly's waist was this trim.

The Queen of the Gypsies of America and her tribe were camped near Meridian when the Queen died during the delivery of what was believed to be her 14th or 15th child. Sweet mercy, she was probably tired from wearing all her bling, traveling from place to place, telling fortunes, and taking care of babies and toddlers. I guess I should not complain, my life is not that hard. However, I would not mind some her precious jewels.

Queen Kelly's burial at Rose Hill Cemetary turned the cemetery into one of the main Romani burial grounds in the Southeast. Her husband, Emil, King of the Gypsy nation, her successor, Flora, and numerous other Gypsies have been buried alongside her.

If I would not have bounced out of there to head off to college and never return, I would be a seventh generation Merdianite. I just know that somewhere in my family history, one of those gypsies married a chicken farmer or even more taboo, had a tryst with a young dairy farmer resulting in a branch on my family tree. Makes me giddy just thinking of the jeweled, glittery decor on that branch. In reality, there is probably not any gypsy blood in me, but……maybe…..

The self-proclaimed gypsy in me has taken me all over the South; I have lived in several towns in Mississippi, in Memphis, Austin, TX, a Summer in Destin, FL, and since marrying Big Buckaroo, a few place in Arkansas. Even though I have strong bonds with people in each of the places I have been, I am always up for a new adventure, not so much the packing and moving furniture (at least there is U-Haul and I do not have to pack a wagon), but the excitement that comes with a new town. And, boy we have landed in a dandy.

I watched all seven seasons of The Gilmore Girls, oh my, I love me some Gilmore Girls. If you have watched the show (if not, come out from under your rock and start, you will love it) it takes place in the fictional town of Stars' Hollow, a town populated by an eclectic mix of dreamers, artists, and everyday folk, well sistah friends, I have found a real live Stars Hollow. And, I get to live here!

I have found the people in our new town to be wonderful and kind; some quirky and eccentric, some reserved and quiet, and everything in between. I am sure I will learn more of the dynamics as time goes by, but so far, everyone has been warm, welcoming, non-judgemental, and friendly.

I am happy to unload my gypsy wagon and lay down roots in this town. And, thank you to my parents for giving me strong roots and beautiful, fearless wings. I hope and pray that we will be as successful in giving that to the Little Buckaroos.

Gypsy Princess Wanna Be,
The Park Wife

The Park Wife Hillbilly

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 14:57:00 +0000

I can not believe it has been so long since I interacted with my bloggity friends on here. Did you miss me? Um, did you know I was not around? Don't answer that, the answer might send me into the corner with leftover chocolate dipped strawberries from Valentine's Day and hours of browsing Pinterest for cool things that I will never get around to doing.

See, I have been a bit busy. I know, aren't we all. Not only have we re-launched Arkansas Women Bloggers (which thankfully, I have had some fantastic, heavy-lifting done by Julie at Eggs and Herbs), but we finally were able to move back to the mountains. Woohooooo (insert boisterous cheers here)!

I first fell in love with the beautiful mountains in Arkansas after I left Memphis, married Big Buckaroo, and moved to Petit Jean State Park. We loved it there - the beauty, the people, what an extraordinary place. Then, we moved to a historical park in a flat, sandy area. Great for gardening, but no mountains. I had many wonderful friends there and (watch out, about to gush over the love of my life) Big Buckaroo did an extraordinary job with that park. He definitely left it a MUCH better place than he found it.

I have spent the last month unpacking boxes in a beautiful new home, exploring our incredible new town that for all you Gilmore Girls fans (if you haven't watched it, start tonight, one of my favorite shows EVER) is just like Stars Hollow, getting kids settled into new surroundings and being there for Big Buckaroo as he has taken on managing a huge park with many facets. Oh, and I watched all nine seasons of As Time Goes By. Love me some Judi Dench.

I have also been fighting Internet connection issues. Let's just say it is not pretty when a blogger and social media gal is not connected to the web consistently for a month and a half. Hand over the chocolate sistah! Actually, although frustrating at times, it has been good as we transitioned. The time I allot for the computer each day has been added to extra games of UNO with the Buckaroos, decorating the house, visiting cool shops in our town, and cooking a little more. So, my disconnect has not been all bad, well there is the increased number of dirty pots, but, alright, not all bad.

Watch out, The Park Wife is back and oh mercy, what tales I will have to tell in this extraordinary place I live, with three of the most incredible guys, and a fish. (we no longer have our horse, chickens, goats, nope, no farm animals at our new place). But, just wait and see what we do have, I can not wait to share this next chapter of our life with you.

Hillbilly with awesome boots,
The Park Wife

Ask The Park Wife: Not From Scratch Cookies

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Sat, 10 Dec 2011 15:06:00 +0000

Is making cookies from a bag (like Betty Crocker's sugar or choc. chip) qualify for homemade? Upnorth

Dear Upnorth,
I would have to say NO. But, that does not mean that they are not tasty and completely acceptable to serve. You could doctor them up a bit or if you are taking them to a party, put a few minutes into the presentation.

But, as with everything in life, be upfront and honest. When I get compliments on pre-made food, which just has to happen sometimes when you have kids and 3,248 other things to get done in a day (I hear all my foodie friends GASPING ), I say, "I was up all night making that". Then I say, not really, and tell them what brand it is.

As if we as women need one more thing to feel inadequate about, girl, just get that roll of dough and pop them in the oven. Remember, it is the thought that counts and the people you want to surround yourself with in this life will be perfectly happy with Betty Crocker as long as you are there with them.

The Park Wife, who will never be featured on the Food Network

It is better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else’s life with perfection. ~ The Bhagavad Gita

Ask The Park Wife: Holiday Guests

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Thu, 08 Dec 2011 16:59:00 +0000

Park Wife, please help! I have family coming in for Christmas. We drink decaf coffee, they like regular. We use 2% milk, they like whole. We eat cereal, they cook a full breakfast everyday. We don't drink wine, they have a glass every night. Am I expected to buy new coffee, milk and stock my liquor cabinet? Should I get up and make breakfast everyday? I want them to feel 'at home' and I don't want to make them mad but I still want to stick to my grocery budget. Julie

Oh Julie, you might as well readjust your grocery plan to include Ramen Noodles for the remainder of the month. Yes, if you are hosting guest in your home, you will need to make some adjustments for hospitality sake.

With that said, there are ways to make them feel welcome without TOTALLY messing up your routine or breaking the bank. I recommend that you make a nice basket to have in the kitchen when they arrive with a small thing of coffee, a nice, yet affordable bottle of wine, and make some kind of breakfast pastry so they will have something to nibble on when they wake up and you guys are still warm under the covers. I am sure you can think of a few other affordable things to put in the basket according to what you know about your guests. If all else fails, you can print out a map with directions to the nearest Waffle House, I jest.

I don't think you have to go overboard, but you will need to do your best to make them feel welcome in your home. And, that might require an early rise, some extra caffeine and a couple of wine glasses in the sink.

Happy Entertaining,

The Park Wife

Ask The Park Wife: Children's Manners

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Sat, 03 Dec 2011 15:04:00 +0000

Dear Park Wife,

We have been invited to a holiday party at the home of my husband's boss. There will be a sit down dinner. Here is the kicker, they have invited our children too!!! I am worried that they will spit out the food, talk with their mouthes full or say something inappropriate. What do I do?
Shaking Like A Leaf in Missouri

The Park Wife responds:
Sweetie, Rome was not built in a day, but don't plan your conniption fit yet. You are going to be able to make it through so that your husband will still be employed by the end of the night. At least I hope, the economy is bad, so sistah start NOW!

How I see it, you have two options: 1- Tell your hostess that you and your spouse would love to come, however, the kids are quiet busy with school, sports, science project, basket weaving, trying to secure their space on Santa's NICE list, etc or 2- Have a "manners bootcamp" from now until the party time. Make it fun, but keep them focused on what is expected of them. Hit the big things like please and thank you, no elbows on table and basic dinner conversation.

The night of the party, have a pre-party refresher (additionally, you may bribe and threaten to take away their Ipad, oh wait, that was my secret). I think you will be able to limp through, HOWEVER, manners like all child training is not a one time thing, it is on-going. They might go through a rebellious stage where they want to chew gum like a horse, don't freak, just get a bit tighter on your training regimen. A glimmer of HOPE, I have never seen a child with well-mannered parents who grew into an adult completely devoid of social grace

Good luck and I hope they don't serve spaghetti,
The Park Wife

Tis the Season- "Ask The Park Wife" Is Here To Help

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Wed, 30 Nov 2011 20:19:00 +0000

Ask The Park Wife starts tomorrow, December 1! I know, the excitement is overwhelming, calm down ladies, I am here to save the day. Bless your little hearts.

I will spend December covering all your holiday dilemma's, like being on the receiving end of a re-gift, handling all those tough questions like Did your son really drop out of college?, declining party invitations and other answers to prevent a seasonal snafu of humongous proportion.

Silly, serious, or fun...I've got an answer for everything (just ask Big Buckaroo)! If you have a problem, I'm your girl. If by some strange reason I don't have the answer (math is not my strong suit), I will channel my inner Emily Post or ask someone from my "expert" panel (um, friends).

I will then kick off the new year with more answers to your pressing questions. I will cover well-rounded interests --- child training, etiquette, relationship advice, homeschooling, community development, simple living, gardening, what to name your kids, why Gilmore Girls went off the air, you know the important life stuff.

Ask me anything- I assure you I will always give you an answer that is heartfelt with a touch of Southern charm and sass!

In the name of full disclosure, it’s important to admit I don’t have a background in psychology, unless you count the one college course I took. Well, maybe we should not count that because I made a C. But I promise I will give you the best advice I can. I also promise to keep it anonymous. Don’t worry I would never give out your real name unless you wanted me to.

I look forward to your questions, send them to theparkwife@gmail.com!

Welcome to the party,
The Park Wife

**** The Park Wife, does not accept any responsibility for what might happen if you accept or attempt to follow any of her advice. Unless of course you have a financial windfall, then I would like to get a cut of that please.

The Giving POW WOW

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Tue, 15 Nov 2011 14:15:00 +0000

A Tradition Worth Sharing, you still have time to do this!

Hello, I am The Park Wife and I am a tradition junkie. (Let me hear you say "Hello Park Wife"). I was raised in Mississippi with many wonderful Southern holiday traditions and have added a few as I married and started my own family. However, I found out that there is such thing as tradition overload.

I live on a state park, love the simplicity of my life, and am trying to keep the holidays from getting out of hand, so I have chosen the traditions that speak to our family and have thrown out the rest.

A couple of years ago, I started a tradition with our two little buckaroos that is wonderful for character training, a history lesson (we are homeschoolers), and it helps to de-clutter before the holidays. Now that is a win-win tradition that fits our life perfectly, it is THE GIVING POW WOW.

In Native American culture, true wealth comes from sharing with others instead of amassing material wealth. The gesture of giving illustrates selflessness while it strengthens the community bond. The gesture is more important than the value of the gift. Now, that is something I want our boys to understand and embrace.

Last year, we invited some other families to join in on the fun of our Giving Pow Wow. All the kids cleaned out their closets of toys that were still in good shape and brought them to our volunteer fire station/community library wearing full Native American regalia. We sat in a circle around the treasures we would donate to a local charity and the festivities began. The children were given a history of pow wow’s and of the tribe’s from our area, that fulfilled history class for the day. Also, several of the children shared what they know about the Native American culture from sign language to the meaning of face paint colors. We then all held hands and prayed for the recipients of our gifts, that their lives would somehow be better from our act of generosity.

Plan your Giving Pow Wow today and give your children a shared past that they can pass on to future generations, a tradition that embodies the qualities of the person you hope them to be.

We return thanks to our mother, the earth, which sustains us.
We return thanks to the rivers and streams, which supply us with water.
We return thanks to all herbs, which furnish medicines for the cure of our diseases.
We return thanks to the moon and stars, which have given to us their light when the sun was gone.
We return thanks to the sun, that has looked upon the earth with a beneficent eye.
Lastly, we return thanks to the Great Spirit, in Whom is embodied all goodness,
and Who directs all things for the good of Her children.
--Iroquois

In everything, give thanks,
The Park Wife

Raising Warriors That Protect Their Hearts

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Wed, 12 Oct 2011 15:35:00 +0000

Raising two warriors is a bit overwhelming at times. My brain gets tired answering questions like how do rockets work, what years did King Louis XVI live, why don't worms have legs and so on. In response to the elevated sense of wonder as they progress in age, I have had to beef up my tool bag. In addition to the crayons that are always in my purse, (along with some organic suckers when I get really desperate) I keep a dictionary in my car, yes one that is paper and bound, so I can throw it in the back seat when Little Buckaroo asks me the 50th question of the day and what it means and a Bible to seek answers in God's word. I am all about teaching them to find the answers.

But, with their hearts, I am holding on tight, not allowing to go with the flow. The condition of our sons hearts determines the course of their life and that is HUGE, I will not waver.

Every Saturday at the soccer field, the kids on the team I coach tell me about their girlfriends/boyfriends and who is "going out with" whom (which yes, is amazing since they are 8-years-old and can't drive, so I am not sure where they are going, ha).

Last soccer season, Little Buckaroo observed this and I watched peer pressure happen right before my eyes. On our way home after a game, Little Buckaroo said he likes kicking the soccer ball with Jordyn, so should she be his girlfriend. All I could think at the moment was, HERE WE GO......

I did not get married until I was 29, so I was in the dating world for a while and know how it all works, yes, all to well. I want better for our guys, I want them to save their hearts for the one God has purposed for them, but how can they do that if they give up pieces of their heart along the way?

So, here is how I explained it to Little Buckaroo. I grabbed a piece of bread and told him that is his heart. I began to pull pieces off a little at a time telling him that was him giving his heart away to a girl. When I was done, there was only a small circle of bread left. I told him that if he gave his heart away piece by piece that when he is older and found the girl God had planned for him, he would only be able to give her a piece of his heart and she deserved better than that. Does it sound like a hard thing to do this day and age, you bet. On the flip side, do I want him to end up with a girl that at 6-years-old began repeatedly giving her heart and then every other part of herself to guys. Um....no.

We hope to raise warriors that seek the face and heart of God, as they learn to wield a sword and conquer the ugly in this grand adventure called life. And, yes, I hope they will one day save the damsel in distress and treat her as the princess God created her to be.

Oh, by the way, I do find peace and humor in knowing that Big Buckaroo is charged with giving them the sex talk. I hope he is planning his tool bag for that one right now!
The Park Wife

Thank You Mr. Army Man

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Wed, 07 Sep 2011 20:59:00 +0000

Dear Army Man from Walmart:
I am in awe of the sacrifice you and your fellow soldiers make so that I can take our kids to the county fair, gather with other families for BBQs, watch our kids play soccer, homeschool them in a country that allows me to be their teacher, to have Bibles all throughout our home, and so much more, all while you have to wave goodbye to your wife and children and go and fight for me to have those rights.

But, that is not why I write this letter. I have an extraordinary 5-year-old who has a spirit of justice, who is disciplined, yet forgiving, courageous, yet kind and who more than anything wants to be "an army man" when he grows up (actually he is leaning toward Marines right now, it changes often). I would like to thank you for smiling at that little boy in Walmart and when he told you that he was going to be an Army man when he grows up, you squatted down to his level, put your hat on his head and told him he could be anything he wanted to be as long as he worked hard and sacrificed for what was right.

I know sir that you and your fellow soldier had been traveling a while and still had hours to go to get to your destination. But, that did not stop you from going a step further and telling this little soldier that he could come outside and see inside your rig.

In a world where priorities are so askew, you sir symbolize what is right~ duty, respect, selfless service, honor, integrity, and courage. Thank you....for your service to our country and for epitomizing what a true American hero is to a little boy who I pray will not be afraid to live courageously among his peers and who will walk humbly with God.

Blessed at Walmart (not because of saving money, but yes, living better),

The Park Wife

Short Photographer

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Fri, 26 Aug 2011 20:56:00 +0000

Little Buckaroo has been using my camera to take some pictures to enter in the county fair photography contest. So, before we went into town (we sound so rural) to film a morning show about one of the bazillion things I get myself into, he asked to take a picture of me.

I am usually the one taking the pictures so there are not many of me, as compared to all the ones with the Little Buckaroo's and Big Buckaroo. Our grandchildren one day will not know that I was ever less than 60 with white hair as they will know me then, now wait, Miss Clairol will probably still be visiting every 6 weeks, so the white hair thing might be an exaggeration.

So, I gave in and let our 4 ft 5 inch child take my photo. I give you that bit of info because it may explain photo 1.

Hey, at least it is a good shot of my beloved boots.

So, I then asked, "did you get my whole body in the picture or just my face?" His reply, "um, not sure I got either, can you squat down so you will fit in the picture?"

I went into a lesson on framing your picture in photography at this point, it lasted about 3 minutes. He then said, "oh, I get it. Now, can you squat down now, it would make framing the picture easier."

I gave in because 1-I was sweating like Paula Deen when she runs out of butter, and 2- Littlest Buckaroo was in the chicken coop trying to catch a chicken so I could hold it in the picture (yea, that was going to happen).

I hope some of his fair photos turn out better, and thankfully my friend Nikki at Delta Ridge Photography will be here next month for a visit and can take a picture of me for our grandkids.

Plus, she can photoshop ten years and 20 pounds off me hopefully.
The Park Wife

Tell Me Your Favorite Blogs

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Mon, 15 Aug 2011 13:51:00 +0000

I love to stumble onto a blog that really speaks to me. Sometimes it feels like that blogger and I are soul sistahs and other times there are bloggers with ideas or a lifestyle that might not have any resemblance to my life, but my eyes are opened to some truth.

So, I want to know the top 3 blogs that you read on a regular basis so I and all of my readers (yes, all 5 of them) might find that kindred spirit blogger that they might not have found without you introducing them to us.

I will go ahead and throw The Pioneer Woman out there because many of us read her daily and are inspired by her. So, no need to put her on your list, she is a given.

Looking forward to "meeting" your favorite bloggers!

The Park Wife

Fried Green Tomatoes on the Mountain

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Tue, 09 Aug 2011 21:17:00 +0000

View from our room at The Studio.

I had a fabulous time recently on Petit Jean Mountain when the Winthrop Rockefeller Institute hosted myself and the other ladies who make up the Arkansas Women Bloggers Leadership team ( Fawn, Beth and Julie) for a whirlwind overnight planning session. We were treated like royalty staying in The Studio, named aptly as it was formerly Mrs. Rockefeller’s art studio. It is perched high above the Petit Jean River Valley with an extraordinary view from the back porch. Of course, this was not my first time here since I used to work on the mountain when this facility was part of Winrock International. My dear friends held Little Buckaroo's baby shower for me here (great memories), however, it has been extensively remodeled, it is extraordinary!

There is a long list of the fantastic things that came from the planning session which we will soon share as we relaunch our AWB site. But, one of the main highlights of our time on the mountain was a culinary demonstration in the Institutes state-of-the-art kitchen. Chef Robert Hall, a native Arkansan, Olympic chef, and army veteran, treated the AWB Leadership Team and some Arkansas Women Blogger members, who are some of the top foodie bloggers in our state, to a five-course meal.

Everything was delicious and Chef shared all of his recipes with us. Go over to Arkansas Women Bloggers for all the yumminess.

Now, I am a bit more into growing veggies and selling them at the farmers' market than cooking, but like all true Southern Belles, I know how to fry me up some green tomatoes. So, go check out Chef Hall's recipe for Fried Green Tomatoes and then take a recommendation from me on how to kick it up a notch.

Fried Green Tomato Po'boys, yes ma'am, yummalicious. Cut some French bread baguettes into 6-inch lengths. Split each lengthwise but not through to the other side, Spread with some Rèmoulade Sauce. Yes, it is getting dangerously delicious right now. Layer some shredded lettuce, the Fried Green Tomatoes, cooked bacon (oh yes, bless your heart), and some avocado slices. Then, devour.

Or, you could also place some fried green tomatoes and cooked bacon on a hot buttermilk biscuit. uh-huh, that's right, I went there. Crisp, golden-crusted, hot out of the skillet fried green tomatoes, not sure it can get much better.

From one of my favorite movies, yes, Fried Green Tomatoes:

Missy: I hear they've got an assertive training class for southern women. [looks puzzled] Of course that's a contradiction in terms.

A contradiction indeed,

The Park Wife

Disclaimer: The Winthrop Rockefeller Institute provided the Arkansas Women Bloggers Leadership team with overnight lodging in their facility for a working meeting and culinary event. However, this blog post was not solicited or compensated. My opinions are my own and I have chosen to share this experience with you because I truly believe that the Winthrop Rockefeller Institute is offering something fantastic.

Thank you Gov. Rockefeller from the bottom of my heart for all you did for Arkansas and especially for Petit Jean Mountain. A life well-lived, a legacy that changes lives.

Going Home Again, Thank You Gov. Rockefeller

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Thu, 21 Jul 2011 16:37:00 +0000

Home again, home again, jiggety-jig.

After I married Big Buckaroo, I moved to Petit Jean Mountain State Park where he was a ranger. Of course, moving from downtown Memphis to the top of a mountain was a drastic change, but I was in love and would have lived in a cabin in the woods, eaten beef jerky and sewn my own clothes (alright a huge exaggeration there) for that man.

Thankfully, the Lord does provide because I landed a Public Relations job at an international development organization that was headquartered on top of the mountain. Yes, I said international development and mountain in the same sentence. How does that happen? Well, one name says it all- Winthrop Rockefeller.

Yes, of THE Rockefeller Family, but Winthrop Rockefeller was a rebel. He chose not to take a job at the family business, Standard Oil, he quit Yale in his 3rd year, took a job as a roughneck in the Texas oil fields, and fought for our country as a commander in WWII receiving the Bronze Star with Oak Leaf Cluster and the Purple Heart. Oh, and he was a two-term Governor of the state.

Through his leadership and philanthropy, he transformed the state’s politics, economy, culture, and education for the better. And, he changed Petit Jean Mountain, the place he CHOSE as his home.

A year after I chose dirty diapers, Cheerios all over my floor and baby kisses over hopping on a plane to D.C., writing brochures, website hoopla and all the other stuff that goes with promoting an organization, Winrock International moved their headquarters to Little Rock. Now, on the estate of the late Governor sits the extraordinary Winthrop Rockefeller Institute, an educational institute and conference center centered around the legacy of the ideas of Rockefeller, a place where collaboration and change thrive. And.... I have been invited home.

You have seen my ramblings about that little group (403 women strong) I founded called Arkansas Women Bloggers, right? Well, the world-class convening center WRI has invited myself and the AWB go-to gals Fawn, Julie, and Beth, um, the ladies who make it all happen, for a day at WRI. They are not only allowing us use of one of their meeting rooms for brainstorming and organization that is going to launch AWB to a whole new level (more to come on that), but they are also hooking us up BIG TIME. At noon, their culinary staff will be sharing a demonstration with the AWB ladies and some foodie bloggers from throughout the state. Yes ma'am, my belly is already preparing for the yumminess.

Go learn more about WRI at LivetheLegacy.org, it is an incredible place. WRIs Heritage Farmstead and their Growing Healthy Communities Initiative fits right into my life as a farmers' market chic and community organizer, I can't wait to learn more. Plus, I am going to be able to visit with many of my friends from my life on Petit Jean. So much fun!

Watch The Park Wife on Facebook and Twitter this weekend, I can't wait to share with you about this extraordinary opportunity to go home again.

Arkansan By Choice,
The Park Wife

An Uplifting Giveaway!

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 01:41:00 +0000

WARNING: All of my male readers (yes, all two of you...um, my brother and Taz) stop reading now because this is going to be about bras and not in the way that you would enjoy, sorry, I will blog about food, adventure, and single friends later.

Alright ladies, all but a few of my readers are wearing the wrong size bra. Yes you, um...don't click off, I am talking to you. Up to 85% of women are in bras that they spill out of, bras that are not supportive, bras where the straps fall down constantly and bras that flatten, squish, droop or just plain look unattractive on the body.

Hop over to Sharing The Park Wife Love site to read my article and find out about a fabulous giveaway from Le Mystère Lingerie valued at $125.

Recharging Mom Batteries

noreply@blogger.com (The Park Wife) — Thu, 07 Jul 2011 15:24:00 +0000

My BFF Jenn and I ran away. Well, we actually drove since we were going all the way to Hot Springs, Arkansas and because we really don't run unless someone is chasing us. Of course, we eventually came back, but we took a day off from boys, dirt, "look mom", making meals, and cleaning toilets.

The day began with a hour and half drive. Now, many people are usually in a hurry to get where they are going, you know the whole destination/journey debate. We are two moms with five boys between us, believe me, we can appreciate time in a vehicle without kiddos yelling behind us - "he touched me", "he is singing too loud and off key", "are we there yet?" Much needed, uninterrupted girl talk was had on the drive.

We arrived at our destination:

The Chrysalis Day Spa is a wonderful, serene place with some very nice women that work there. A deep tissue massage was first on the agenda. The lady message therapist I had was very good, however, I always get chatty and do not relax like I should. I know her entire life story.

Then, it was pedicure time. Jenn is enjoying being pampered, the massage chair was a highlight of the pedicure.

Here is my new nail color, Tropical Punch. I try to find time to paint my toenails (especially during the summer when it is against Southern Belle rules to wear sandals with naked toe nails), but honestly, I'm lucky to get to use the restroom alone most of the time. So, having someone do this for me was fabulous, a real treat!

Sushi time! My adventurous friend had never had sushi and hopped on board when I suggested it. She preferred the tempura, true to her southern roots that anything battered and fried is good. I agree, plus I love me some Philadelphia Rolls and Osaka's OMG roll, delicious!

We did a little shopping and then saw a Merle Norman. Jenn suggested makeovers. Hey, I am not under any illusion that my 40-year-old crows feet don't need some attention, so in we went.

Merle Norman (the one at 242 Cornerstone Blvd) Owner Tiffany Story got us glammed up, we were feeling pretty feisty and fun at this point. So, we went and got ice cream.

Some days I feel like running away and assuming a new identity, in Italy preferably, but most days I find there is nothing in this world that I have sacrificed that is worth more than the overwhelming love I have for my husband and children and the love I receive back from them.

We had replenished our super mom powers, so we headed home.

Our brave husbands took all the boys (pic from Army party we had a couple of weeks ago) to see Cars 2 and to Chuck E. Cheese for lunch. Jenn and I are extraordinarily blessed women, park wives of two men of integrity who love the Lord and adore their wives and children.

And, hey, they are doing a great job running two of the best state parks in Arkansas. Plan your summer vacation now at one of the 52 wonderful parks in the natural state, check out arkansasstateparks.com for more info. (I know, shameless plug, but The Park Wife must promote state parks, it is part of who we are).

A day off, fun was had by all,

The Park Wife