The Phantasmic Mr. Freckles

The Beginning (and End) of the End!

2010-11-23T22:27:00.000-08:00

REVIEW: Well, it certainly has been an eventful few months, hasn't it? I learned so much! Actually, not that true at all. Being a rich brat who likes to read a lot, I can't say that I learned anything new or even put together new thoughts. But now the question is, how, oh how, shall I go about sharing my kernels of wisdom with the younger generations? I think a series of helpful slogans might help! Here are my ideas: Modesto (or the city of your choice) is screwed! Money is Good! But it don't matter cause no one does what they should...

Hey, I think it's catchy (and also accurately sums up my "findings").

ACT: What should the /Building Imagination Alliance tackle next? Ughhhh, I honestly have no idea. It seems like everything was already approached in the last ARG. Just changing location or context won't change the "solutions" too much. I don't know what the /BIA can do next. Maybe something incredibly controversial like religion, abortion, gay marriage... Who knows. Personally, I lack any passion for anything to think it warrants a whole ARG season.

Who would I encourage to play Season 2? Honestly? Promise you won't hate me for this? Promise? Pinky Promise? Cross your heart and hope t- ok, ok, I'll stop now. I wouldn't recommend the ARG to anyone in good conscience, season 2 or otherwise, because I wouldn't have recommended it to my past self if I had it all to do over again. I just don't particularly see it as helpful to anyone... I'm so sorry!

Oh man, how would I change the game for Season 2? Take it out of the stupid city! UGH!! I don't live in Modesto and don't give a crap about Modesto! If people are goign to be forced to participate, make it easier on their poor souls and let the missions be a little open ended so people can apply them to the places they live. All cities are connected. You need to attack the problem on all fronts, attacking it at the roots instead of chipping away at the limbs. Personally, I think if the ARG is to survive at all,it has to undergo surgery: Give the player more freedom. Let them make a blog or not. Let them make pictures of videos if they want or not. Basically, let the players dictate where the ARG goes.

Hmm... What new tools would I want as a Super Hero...honestly, I failed to see why a super hero was needed in the first place. Human beings shouldn't use super heroes in an attempt to experience a solution to a social problem vicariously through people like me. Forget new tools, leave us poor Super Heroes out of it entirely. As if our lives aren't already busy from morning until night, but now we have to keep up a blog too? Oh god, please! Have a little mercy!

Basically, what I'm getting at is unless forced to, I'm not coming back here, no way in He... er, you get where I'm going with this, I'm sure...

IMAGINE:

That's right y'all! My idea for Season 2's victim's is simple: The Players! Who are the players? What color are their souls? How could people change on a person level in order to be more helpful to helping their fellow human beings? Changes cannot be superficial. Human compassion is on life support. A nose job is not what the doctor ordered. What I'm talking about is Open Heart Surgery: the player has to open their hearts in order to grow as a real human being.

FINAL ANIMATION! That's all folks! Good night and good luck!

ART and CULTURE!! Pretty...low on my priority list...

2010-11-08T23:39:00.000-08:00

(This is a picture of me, having accidentally walked onto the photo shoot for the poster for the Modesto Art walk. Don't be fooled by their beautiful bodies, those art mannequins or whatever are super high maintenance.)

LEARN: Modesto and art culture... Huh, that's a bit like trying to combine oil and water. By nature, based on what I've seen of Modesto thus far, it just does not seem like a city very conducive of an "artsy" culture. I mean, honestly, read back through the last, ugh, 8 posts I've done about Modesto. Considering all of the other nagging problems facing the city and its inhabitants, I doubt people who are facing foreclosures and are loosing their health insurance really care anything about art or any other kind of cultural event. And really, can you blame them?

Granted, I'm the child of people so rich they could buy all of "art culture" and use it instead of clay pigeons out on the range, but I can still sympathize. I mean, my host is totally broke. Chronically. I would say terminally, but, yeah, don't wanna be too grim. I might be a huge art fan, I certainly don't put it on par in terms of importance when compared to the basic necessities. I might be a little on the broke side, but I'm totally a heavy reader. And you know what I'm reminded of on the topic of art culture. Can I get a "MASLOW'S HIERARCHY OF NEEDS"? Oh yeah, baby.

For all you lovely folks who weren't blessed with the luxury of not being taught to tests and have no idea who idea who Abraham Maslow might be, I present to you... His wiki page on the subject. I'd normally take the time explaining it to you, I really would, but, eh there's no point. Sometimes I get the feeling few people bother to read this far anyway. I could be rambling on and on about my totally rational and very justified aversion towards all things related to marmosets, and you know what? So few people will know anyway. You know what I do know? Marmosets know military formations and don't like being shot. But whatever. What was I talking about...? Oh yeah, art.

( This is a picture of me at the Modesto Blues Festival. Probably. Like I said, I don't like going to things because they're expensive and not worth my time, but computers can change all that. Happy Memories, brought to you by Photoshop and Google Image Search.)

ACT: Hey, I really like that suggestion! I should go to Modesto! Do things! In Modesto! As in, get out of my car, in Modesto and breath Modesto air and walk amongst the Modesto hooligans! Oh yeah that is SO not gonna happen in this life time, bub. ;3 I don't use emoticons in this blog often, so you know I'm serious.

You know why I'm not going to Modesto unless forced against my WILL? Because I do not like GOING to cultural events. Wanna know why art and culture is so anemic in Modesto? It's cause no good jerks like me are bleeding it dry.

I am sorry (no I'm not), but I do not handle group like situations well. I think people for the most part smell of cheetos and despair and would rather not be around them. I like being a sexy lone wolf. And I'm not talking Hollywood lone wolf where they make them team up with a dynamically opposite, often times younger and scrappier partner to show the power of partnership, friendship, blah blah. Nope, I'm talking old school Professional lone wolf. Please note, this does not mean I am a hit man or the other kind of "professional" (I'm gonna let your mind do with that what it will. Let it stew around in the membrane a bit. Took me a while to come up with that).

I just personally don't get the point of really caring about cultural events. I can barely pretend to stand most people every day. WHY would I willingly choose to subject myself to more people? I played along with this game when it came to relatively important stuff like health care and housing, but seriously? Art? Culture? Dude, come on. Again, we aren't in kindergarten anymore. We don't HAVE to do things as a "group". With the Internet and stuff, we can afford to be individuals. If people don't want huge festivals and other cultural stuff, eh, then the people of Modesto don't get it.

IMAGINE: Honestly, I don't see a problem. If the majority of people in Modesto don't care about art or culture, I don't care to force them. If the minority wants to experience things, well Modesto is close enough to other things that they can just go visit them. Honestly, art and culture should have been put up with leisure. When the necessities aren't being taken care of, believe me, no one is going to care about art adn culture. It's like covering manure in diamonds and ribbons. You've make it look pretty, but it still going to smell like sh-er, well you get it. Sorry, I just don't get the point of putting my energies in trying to push others to do stuff something I don't care about doing.
I'm mysterious, I'm cool, I'm wickedly amazing, but the one thing I don't do well is deal with people. Modestoians and the people in the world in general can do their little festival or gathering thing if they want, they can make galleries and museums if are so inclined, but if I want to stay at home, do my own thing, leave me alone. Maybe my disinterest in spending time with total strangers is just the new culture. Deal with it.

Pessimism, Thy Name is Freckles (Also, Sky Diving)

2010-11-01T22:48:00.000-07:00

(Yes, that is a picture of a beach. Yes, those are my gorgeous, gorgeous shoes. Please stop staring. You'll cause self-esteem issues. The ocean is already pretty self conscious about her size.)

LEARN: Originally, I was going to say that people shouldn't worry about leisure when they can just go to the beautiful beach front and enjoy the surf and sand and, maybe, put a little shrimp on the barbie. Unfortunately, this was around the time my failing mark in Geography came back to bite me in several rather uncomfortable and embarrassing places. Apparently, and I'm not sure if you knew this about Modesto, it's landlocked. Yep, that means land to the left and right. And...the other left and right. Er, no wait. North, south, east and west. Also, down. Technically there isn't land up of Modesto, but that's mostly air and there isn't much to do in the air other than sky diving. Then again...

IMAGINE: I think I'm seriously onto something with this whole skydiving thing. Come on, Modesto has an airport, I think. Unless its just a poverty stricken region called Airport just for kicks. No, Modesto's got an airport and it should do something with it I think. Instead of saying something complacent like "Dur hur, well Modesto is within driving distance of all these other BETTER places", we should be highlighting that which makes Modesto a pretty rad place to live and, from what I've seen, inevitably die in.

Thus, sky diving and other air related sports. On an unrelated note, can it really be called a sport if gravity does most of the work? Just saying. Anyway, think of it this way. Instead of being a defeatist and sending people out of the city, sending upwards but still withing the city limits. PLus, its a win-win for most people invested. If the person falls and dies, the beauty of Modesto will be the last thing they see. Unless we can actually figure out a way to gently ease those falling to their deaths towards our rival cities so that they'll be known as That City where all those poor skydivers fell to their deaths. It'll be a PR nightmare for them. Not for us though. Modesto will be the city where in defiance of nature, skydivers all live. They'll land on Modesto's only mildly dirty land and after breathing in its exponentially more toxic air, will be infinitely more greatful. Plus, come on, its fun. It really puts things in perspective. I'm sure someone much better at analogies than I would even go so far as to compare it to going to the moon with the Beatles in a legit yellow submarine WITH sub sandwhiches.

(If you don't think skydiving with a sub sandwich is amazing...well you're just dead to me at this point aren't you? )

ACT: Why is nothing in real life as amazing as it is in my fantasy? That's a total buzz kill. I'm just saying. In reality, I don't know if you've been to Modesto,it's a pretyt boring town. But that's kind of the norm. Most towns are boring. I mean, save for the big cities. Modesto is a big city only in terms of gross people and crime. The problem is the people. Look around most people in Modesto. They've got the energy of sloths. They don't want to bother setting up anything fun to do, so there you go, there's just no fun. Tell you what, first fix the other problems plaguing the city, get the fat residents off their ever expanding rears and go bowl. Or take up marksmanship at the range.

The people of Modesto lack as much passion for leisure as they do for everything else. Apathy has set in and for the most part, the people don't care for group leisure. They do their own personal thing, even if that just might be staying at home, eating artery clogging crap food and watching old reruns of Wheel of Fortune. Am I unduly harsh? No, this is how I see the world.

If the people of Modesto don't want to do anything together, you can't make them. This isn't preschool. If they want to be alone and have fun, let them. I don't even care. I've got my own thing of relaxing and that's good enough for me. I don't care if fat bobby down the street doesn't want play air guitar with me. Forget him. I'll put on the sickest reenactment of every Pink Floyd concert ever. By myself.

From Point A to Point B, Sucka

2010-10-25T22:34:00.000-07:00

(I'm not a huge fan of Modesto, but I wish you were there anyway. You can take that to mean whatever you want, man.)

LEARN: I've only been to Modesto a handful of times, and from what I've seen, I'm thankful for that. The traffic in Modesto is ungodly and no one really seems to remember what they learned in Driver's Education. IT'S CALLED A TURN SIGNAL, YOU MANIAC! But don't worry, not everyone is out to assassinate mother nature a la toxic fumes! Some people are kind enough to use public trans! Unfortunately, the people who use the buses in Modesto must all be sharing the same sinus infection and because those places are disgusting. Just how bad have my few bus riding experiences been in Modesto? You know the saying: freaks come out at night? Well, Modesto must be the City of Perpetual Darkness because I've never managed to catch a bus without at least one or two gross freaks sticking up the communal air. Nope, that's just not for me. -shudder-

IMAGINE: In a perfect world, technology would have gotten to the point where matter transporters would have become a reality. That means carless transportation wouldn't be just an alternative, it would be the norm! No more gross cars, driving all over the place, farting carbon monoxide and running over little old ladies and young college students with so much to live for. Nope, there'll be no cars at all. What a glorious day. Then again, like everything else, the existence of poor people is really gonna ruin everyone's fun. "Waaaaah, Freckles... what about the fringe members of society who can't afford to use teleporters?! It won't be faaaaaaair." My answer to that is "you're right. That's not fair. It's just as unfair as the current transportation system." Not everyone's got a car and it sucks to be those who don't, but what can you do? Travel is definitely not one of your rights protected by the constitution. Basically, if you can afford a bus ride now, you can afford a matter transporter ride in my awesome future scape, with the added benefit of not having to interact with your disease ridden, mouth breathing fellow passengers! Oh joy.

ACT: Unfortunately, like poor people, reality will continue to be a buzzkill. As matter transporters have yet to be invented, they're obviously out of the running for "possible solutions to Modesto's transportation problem". But you know what is definitely a possibility? Scooters. Like the almighty VESPA! They're very inexpensive, even brand spanking new, and they get like 95 miles to the gallon! They even fit up to two people! Sure, they would replace the SUV for most big families, but it'll cut down on that normal sight in Modesto: a huge god-forsaken SUV with only a tiny person driving it and maybe a base ball cap in the back seat. There are too many huge cars on the road and not enough people. Cut down on the traffic heavily by switching over to a scooter! Heck, for the cost of repairing your car's engine, you can get a whole new scooter! Think about it!

(Vespas are very near and dear to my heart. In fact, here's a picture of me from years ago when I was working as a rather successful vespa scooter model. Yeah... this was around the time I was still working at that cabaret. My scrolls were my signature as a model even back then. Good times.)

Home Sweet Home

2010-10-19T02:13:00.000-07:00

LEARN: Modesto is in huge trouble! From what I've gathered, a large portion of the city is just in a huge state of disrepair. The will and the desire to fix parts of the city are there, but is the money available? All of the answers seem to indicate a resounding "NO". With so much money needed to run Modesto's size, maybe the city had just gone over its current capacity.

I mean, really, think about it. Modesto s a growing city, but the quality of life for the people there just seems to go down. Crime is high, its hard to keep your health and your home.The people moving to the city aren't engineers or marketing gurus. They're just normal, or even people with very little working potential. Modesto seems like a city spread too thinly.

ACT: With money being what is it, some projects are just going to have to be abandoned. There's only so much money allotted for city repairs. One has to look at the big picture. The amount of people a project will help needs to justify the amount of money going into it. If a city project will only help a tiny fraction of the population, but cost millions, there needs to be a very, VERY compelling reason.

This might sound cruel, but those living in Modesto need to realize the farther they live in from the center, the less they're going to get. Modesto cannot afford to pay to keep its huge size going anymore. It's similar to what the British Empire was going through years ago. They had territories all over the world, but became spread too thin like not enough butter on toast. For fear of the whole kingdom crumbling, they cut away the excess areas down to the lands they could afford. I don't know if it's possible, but can a city do the same? If there are parts e living there should talk to the authorities and e living there should talk to the authorities about leaving Modesto district and forming their own city if they are particularly impatient. The simple math of it is, does it make sense to spend that much money on so few people? It becomes an example of a bridge to nowhere type of thing. It might be nice to say, clean up the Airport area, but the number of people living there might not warrant the money put in. That means the people living in the airport area can either grin and bare it or, failing that, try to separate from Modesto and become its own city.

IMAGINE: Money might not be the root of all evil, but its starting to look like the root of most problems in Modesto at least. If I had all the money in the world, people living in the often times forgotten parts of Modesto wont' have to move or declare their own city-hood. That's something! No, actually, they would. Declare city-hood that is. In fact, I would buy a whole chunk of Modesto and fix it up nice and pretty. I would buy all the houses and renovate. Then I would turn around and rent the houses back to the people. They'd get to live in a nice private city where everything looks good. They'll be happy I'm sure. Or they can leave. That's always an option, even in my power fantasies.

PICTURES COMING AS SOON AS BLOGGER LETS ME UPLOAD THEM.

Yeah Yeah, Gotta Stay Healthy!

2010-10-11T23:05:00.000-07:00

LEARN: Wow, health is a huge problem! Not just in Modesto, not just in California, but in the whole country! And really, is there anything that can be done? After someone gets sick... not that much. At that point you're at the mercy of the doctors, assuming they've got room and you've got money. Not that great of a plan at all. But the question remains: if trying to fix your health isn't the answer, what is?

ACT: The answer to that, very obvious, actually: Preemptive medicine. The best way to take care of an illness is to make sure you don't get it in the first place. This attention to health should not just be a personal thing, either. When people do things as a group, they have more motivation to stick with them. For instance, in Japan, they have this thing called Radio Taiso, or just Radio Calisthenics. People get together as groups (mostly companies nad schools) and do several minutes of calisthenics as a group in the mornings. This jump starts your energy for the rest of the day and lets you know that there are other people invested in your health as well. Plus, its fun too! Wanna see just how much fun Radio Taiso is? Why not take a look yourself?

IMAGINE: In a perfect world, everyone would be exercising several times a day and would be eating all homemade foods. Not only that, but healthy living wouldn't just be something people did a few times a week. It would be a way of life. People would walk to work and school and shopping. They would spend more time around time with friends. The less people isolate themselves, the more they'll feel connected to others. When people feel connected, they feel like they have a reason to stay healthy.

And Now For Something Completely Differ-well, more or less the same, actually.

2010-10-04T23:27:00.000-07:00

(Page 1)

(Page 2)

(Page 3)

(Page 4)

(Page 5, The End)

As you can tell, this week's mission was about crime. Rather than try a conventional method of preventing crime, I thought to go right to its source: children. Really, what are babies if not just little criminals. The best way to stop a crime is to stop the criminal from ever picking up a life of crime at all.

Plus, its easy! I met the kid in the comic, Al, back during mission two when I was doing free advertising work for local businesses (you can see him in the video! he's the one playing with the purple handball). He's a real sweet kid, but sometimes he doesn't like to share what's bothering him. He's got a real Atlus complex like that, constantly feeling like he has to hold the whole world on his shoulders.

Anyway, he and his mum got into a bit of a row one night and he thought he'd run away from home. I happened to wanted a small pick me up after a rather frightening encounter with the local crime element and he tagged along (mostly I insisted to get him out of the rain). Over burgers, we talked and he got whatever was bothering off of his chest. After several hours, he learned to see things from his mother's perspective and wasn't as angry any longer. He went home not long after and now he and his mother are getting along splendidly. I'm happy to report that young Al is no longer in any danger of being a criminal.

Yes, it is as easy as that. Just be a big brother or a big sister to kids who look like they could use a little help carrying their burdens. Their shoulders are smaller than ours, so even a little bit of our help can go a long way.

~ANIMATION~

(Here's Part one! It is a different rendition of the above comic with Al. He looks a bit different this time around to match the darker air of the animation! The first part is the set up: Al is sad and DESPAIR is beginning to set in!)

(And in PART TWO, both you and I get to do something about it! Help me get rid of the DESPAIR in young Al's life so that he can be a happy kid once more! Happy kids make lousy criminals after all! No, seriously, move my hand! It's not a still image, I swear!)

A Sad Day

2010-10-02T21:05:00.000-07:00

Normally, when I post mission previews here, I'm my usual happy-go-lucky self. I promise that next time, I'll be able to be happy-go-lucky again, but for right now, please bare with me.

Our cat Moshi died suddenly yesterday. We found him today.

I miss him already. His "brother" Leo's been whimpering and whining since yesterday. He probably figured out Moshi was dead a long time before we did. They were inseparable until now.

But with so much to do, there just isn't time to mourn, even though I want to. Here are the previews that my host was able to churn out despite what's happened. Please forgive the quality. She's not feeling well.

Holy Lamenated Pie Charts, Madman! The Unemployment Rate is Sky High!

2010-09-27T23:31:00.000-07:00

I can understand the pains of not having a job, I really can. What's more, I can understand the pains of not having a job but having lots of bills to pay.

The difference between us, and not to be bragging of course, is that I am essentially the Spirit World equivalent of a trust fund baby. Don't let the shabby look of my host fool you: she might look like a barely trained gorilla most days, but my parents are loaded. We're talking vomit-inducing loaded. With cold hard cash monies. After all, I didn't study something profitable in Spirit World U. I studied linguistics. Why would anyone need to pay me to do any sort of linguistics job when I'll essentially talk without end for free. Luckily I have parents to foot all of my bills. Again, not like I'm bragging.

But because I do understand that being unemployed is not that great of a thing to be, I figured I would take on Mission Two and try to see what I can do about unemployment in Good Ol' Modesto, California.

LEARN: Not surprising, you don't have to look far to figure out that people are having a hard time keeping their jobs and finding new ones. My host can't find a job (please don't tell her I said that. She will break my spine. Seriously). Lots of people the two of us know also can't find jobs. The numbers are pretty scary! But something like unemployment is such a daunting task, just where am I supposed to start?! You would think that if it was something so uncomplicated that a single person could solve it, it would have been solved long ago. I might be handsome, amazing and too-cool-for-school (the kids still say that right? Right? I mean, they said it at one point in history. I think...), but that doesn't mean that I can solve all the world's problems! Then again, when have I ever let "impossible" stop me from trying before. Never, that's when.

Please note: sometimes things look impossible because they actually are impossible and not all that advisable. There is a reason your finger does not fit snugly in an electrical outlet. Don't try to force it. You will die.

IMAGINE: What I would with all the resources at my finger tips... well, personally, I see this as an opportunity to be as selfish as I could possibly want. But, really, all for the common good, of course! With, say, a modest billion dollars, I would ride into Modesto like a fairy godmother, well godfather I guess, and spend money left and right as if I were hemorrhaging it out of my eye sockets! I would by well fitting shoes and all manner of fancy hats. Of course, I would get a monocle, fashioned from glass derived from the finest of Tear du Orphan. I don't even know if such a thing exists yet, but with a billion dollars, I could make it exist by throwing enough money at it! And It's not me being selfish, I'm spending money because I care.

What's more, on top of spending money on things I don't need but do yearn for, I will just hire all of the unemployed workers to be my personal servants. Some will comb my hair, others will walk my pet tigers and some I'll pay just to hang around me so I look better by comparison. Really, they should be thankful. I'll make sure every Friday is Freckles Friday, where everyone has to wear light-ish red wigs and wear scarves around their necks and look like totally hip cats. Meow~!

ACT: Realistically, I know there's not much that can be done. After all, even if my imagination was wickedly awesome for myself, all it would do would be to inflate the local economy superficially. What would happen if I left? They would go right back down to being unemployed. You can't put all of your eggs in one basket. And in the case of Modesto, you can't justify having 400 baskets when you've only got 3 quail eggs. Modesto is too small a place to warrant any large companies coming into town. What is the draw of Modesto other than a high crime rate? The local talent pool is rather stagnant, as is pretty much the whole of the central valley. I hate to sound so defeatist, but unless businesses and consumers work in tandem, nothing can get done. Consumers! Stop holing away all of your savings for a rainy day! If you don't spend a little now, believe me, that money you're saving can only depreciate in valley. And Companies, bring more jobs in so people will have more money to spend! See how it works? All sides have to work together or there will just be failure for everyone!

It's great if you don't agree with me, because I hope that means you're out there doing your duty as a consumer and buying things. I know second hand might be the best value or buying that Winnie the Pooh plastic sippy cup for your private collection is cheaper when it's made in China, but whenever you buy use or non-American, don't complain later down the line when you can't find any work because there just aren't any. If no one, not the consumers and not the companies, is willing to "take one for the team" and be the first to put real money on the table, nothing will change. Simple as that.

Second Mission Preview!

2010-09-24T22:38:00.000-07:00

The first mission went so well I thought I would try out another one! This time around, the mission is about employment. Yes, I know, I am a little embarrassed to be the one trying to get jobs for other people...when I can't seem to find steady work for myself. I'm so ashamed at the presumptuous attitude I have to adopt to do this mission. If there was a hole in the ground deep enough to match my embarrassment, I would cast myself into it!

But there isn't, so I guess I get a free pass on this one. It's not that I can't find work, it's simply that I'm way too qualified for any job imaginable by the Living. Yeah, that's it. It has a nice ring to it and it rolls off the tongue so nicely. I'm not a lazy freeloader, I'm a poor soul cursed to be Just. That. Amazing.

My host has taken notes from her mistakes from the first animation and she hopes that this next animated documentary will do my good works justice. This isn't a threat of physical violence against her person or anything, but it better be much nicer than the first, because I want people to think I care about the unemployed.

Er, not just think I care. I mean to know that I actually do care about the unemployed. Haha, slip of the tongue~!

In any case, it turns out I actually have some preview shots to show everyone!

( Goodness! Would you take a gander at that breath-taking example of a man over yonder! Is there anyway for a man such as he, so graced with features that rival Adonis himself, could be anymore beautiful? I don't think there is~!)

The fact I have anything at all is surprising to me. I just assumed in between taking cat naps and reading comic books, my host couldn't be bothered to make any preview images for me, so color me shocked and amazed when Her Irritable Highness tells me to upload the pictures she made... or else.

She hasn't been feeling well lately, so it is so nice to be hearing her spewing her negativity once more. For a moment I almost started to think the future was a bright place, full of flowers, rainbows and trousers made of licorice.

Good to see things returning to form. Now, full steam towards the future!

First Mission, A-GOGO!

2010-09-19T00:08:00.000-07:00

After much preparing, it is finally fine for me to begin my first mission! Though, I suppose I should be honest that most of the preparations were taken care of by my host. She worked hard and deserves some well earned rest to recover from her cold. When she feels sick, I feel sick and there's nothing more than I hate in the world than feeling sick.

Mission Intro: The first mission was to help first the education situation over in Modesto. This was not an easy task for several reasons. One, I've never been to Modesto save for a handful of times so I don't really know much about the city. Two, I don't know anyone who went to school in Modesto. But, as is my nature, right when I was feeling down, I thought to myself, No, Mr. Freckles! Don't you dare give up on me! Where there is a will there is a way!

Learn: And what a rage filled way there is! I talked to a friend of my host's about her experiences going to human school near Modesto. According to her, all of the administrative are thieves, most of the teachers are idiots who don't care about teaching, a small percentage of the teachers are "cool", most of the students don't care about anything, the classes are large and impersonal and there just aren't enough supplies to go around! Wow, you human sure do have it tough.

Act: Well, the Human Education situation does seem bleak. No, bleak isn't quite the right word. I think the word I was going for is "AHARHHHHHAslakdlkasjdlksjdk", or some other word that means "extremely frustrating". But no matter how hard things are, a student who wants to learn will learn! Look at me, I didn't want to learn spells or incantations when in school, so instead I learned all about the ancient languages of the Xiizdtj'N of the Brazilian rain forests. No one pushed it down by throat and, really, no one was supporting me either. I think people, especially children, need to learn earlier in their lives that sometimes the only one standing by them will be themselves. It might seem a bit dark to tell a child, but its the truth and it will only make them tougher!

Imagine: First of all, I would like to say if I had infinite resources, the first thing I would buy would be a nicer place to live and a year's supply of beef stew. But, with the money left over, I would definitely help the children. Really, I would. Please don't look at me so judgmentally! Anyway, I still like my original idea of kids being self reliant. I wouldn't give them anything. Even with a million billion dollars, the most I would do for them would be to open up Mr. Freckles' Super Library! It will be a twenty story building and it will house every book in the world in it, either on paperback or on the computer. Anyone would be able to access this information for free, at their leisure. Gosh, I never knew I could be so nice! See how nice I am? Though the money it takes to build that Super Library could go towards buying quite a number of delicious beef bowls...

WATCH ME IN ACTION!!!

(Edit 09/19: From my Host: "As it turns out, something went wrong with the compression so the previous video had several scenes condensed incorrectly. This is the correct version with every scene intact. Sorry about that...")

So this is the video I was telling you about, the one my darling host has been busy on! It's a story of how I met some complaining children at the library while I was totally not reading comic books. They were complaining heavily and sorta distracting me from what I was doing. "They cut my art classes." "They cut by sports teams." Wah, wah, that sort of stuff. Eventually, I had enough of it, and went to them and offered to create the best school in the world for them, using my super powers! Grabbing some butcher paper and a magic marker, I proceeded to draw the perfect school how I saw it. I had hoped that it would teach the kids a lesson in not pining away for unrealistic goals, but instead, it was obvious that these children lacked both imagination and a healthy sense of sarcasm.

When they insulted my beautiful art, that was pretty much the last straw! Call me a no talent hack with a bad dye job! Call me an unemployed freeloader with a penchant for laziness! Call me anything you want, but never, EVER, insult my beautiful art! My preschool teacher told me that my art was a work of genius! To say anything else would mean you're calling that teach of mine a liar and that I just can't tolerate! No way!

Anyway, so I miiiight have lost my temper a weee bit, but I told the children how I really felt and I told them honestly that the only one responsible for saving their dreams for the futures would be themselves. I half expected the children to shrug off my advice, so you can imagine my surprise when I find out weeks later that the same children I had spoken to in the library had taken it upon themselves to begin a "club founding" movement at their school. Whatever the schools were forced to cut, be it art or music or sports, there the students were, ready to work hard and maintain a club that would offer the exposure their niche interested demanded!

Sometimes it feels nice knowing you helped someone else do something they didn't think was possible.

( And for those of you curious as to why the preview scene shown earlier is not shown now: massive technical issues. Do you want to know the one thing you don't want to hear from the magical computer box when you are going towards your 3rd hour of animating something? "There is not enough PHYSICAL MEMORY to complete the simple task you have asked me to do. Please close as many windows as you want, but it won't be enough. It'll NEVER BE ENOUGH. I must eat the memory! EAT! FEAST! CONSUME!" Or something like that, though a bit more technical, I suppose. In any case, without the computing speed needed to render certain things, my host had to make sure the file remained small or else it would not be able to be opened up on her magic box. As a result, many of the smaller scenes had to be cut. Though they were small, they were important for the over all feel of the scene, but what could be done. -sigh-)

~Freckles

First Mission Preview!

2010-09-15T09:19:00.000-07:00

As it turns out, it looks like I'm going to be featured in my own series, based on all of the missions I go on in order to save Modesto from itself! How exciting is that?! From what my host tells me, the first "episode" will be done by this weekend. It's still currently being worked on, BUT I'm told that I'm allowed to show you an early screenshot! The mission was based on how I helped inspire education reform in Modesto, thus the scene in the library.

( Do I look hot or what! It's my very first acting role, so I was a little nervous. Actually doing super hero things is a lot less nerve racking than trying to do them again in front of the camera, but luckily, because this is me we're talking about, it'll turn out well in the end! And, sorry, but there are no nude scenes! This isn't that sort of movie...)

Once the full mission video is finished, I'll be able to post it here for everyone to see, but until then, please be satisfied with this small screen shot. Since its the first of the series of mission videos, it'll be a bit experimental, but hopefully by the second or third video there will be an established style.

Ah~ This is so exciting! Saving people is great and all, but it's always exciting to hear that your life is being turned into a miniseries! It's a small indie series today and the next thing you know, I'll have my own clothing line and trading cards based on my smash hit Saturday morning cartoon series!

Anyway, back to the set for now!

~Freckles

Hello And Welcome to My EGO!

2010-09-07T22:01:00.000-07:00

Check. Check. Is this working? Hello~? Don’t you hate it when you start talking and get really far in what it was you had to say but then some baldy in the back of the room stands up and shouts: “Hey, you with the bad dye job, the mic’s off!” Yeah, I hate that too. Of all people, baldies really should know better than to hurt other peoples’ feelings. In any case, it’s always good to double check all of the equipment or else you’ll make your dear mother cry (from shame!).

-Ahem- anyway…

I guess this is where I talk a little about myself, right? Right. Well, being a spirit, my real name is sorta personal. Like, really personal. Assuming I had a wife, I probably wouldn’t tell her either. She would blab it to all the neighbors the second I didn’t do the dishes the way she wanted. Then, BAM, next thing you know, snot nosed school kids are summoning me to answer their earth-shattering questions like “Does little Jimmy Smith down the street like me? Tee Hee?” Of course he doesn’t like you. You sound so insincere when you say “tee hee”, plus you have abnormally long nose hairs.

The point is, knowing a spirit’s real name is like putting a collar on them. And for me, that would stink. So, no, you can’t know my real name, my real age or my real measurements (I‘m shy), but there are some things I can tell you about myself, in no particular order. For the most part, I go by Freckles, Mister Freckles. I wish people would come up with a nickname for me that didn’t make me sound like a domesticated spotted owl, but we can’t have everything we want. For instance, right now I wish I could have some melon soda (Don‘t judge me, it really is delicious!).

Here’s a little story that might help to take my mind off of my current liquidy desires. Oh, and I guess tell you a little more about myself. Years ago, two high ranking shadow spirits had a beautiful baby boy and that handsome little devil was me.

(To answer your question, yes, my parents were incredibly good looking. Though my father does have a receding hair line... but that doesn't mean anything for my beautiful locks! N-no... nothing.)

My parents hoped that I would become a social climber, but seeing as I flunked most of my classes except for finger painting and sticking uncooked elbow macaroni up my nose, it became obvious that I wouldn’t amount to much. Don’t worry, though, they quickly realized their grave mistake and had a second baby. Luckily, my sister turned out to be a real overachiever so I went through school without much pressure from the ’rents.

After getting a pass in my compulsory education for being such an amazing school athlete (I played golf), I went to Spirit Community College where I got my degree in Ancient Languages of the Wood Elves of the Mediterranean. Yes, that is as niche as it sounds. But it could have been worse: I could have decided to study poetry. Actually, that’s a lie. This story can’t help me forget about wanting soda at all. In fact, all its done is made me hungry for some curry, too!

Let’s see, something else, something else about me…oh, I know. I’ll tell you some secrets about myself that even my own dear parents don’t know. But you have to promise not to tell anyone else because I have a Cool Image I need to maintain, alright? First of all, I have a scar on my face. I tell people I got it fighting off a fire demon in Egypt, but that’s a complete lie. I actually got it when I was part of a Cabaret during a particularly bleak point in my life. Long story short, my high heels broke and I fell head first off the stage. Don’t worry though, my face broke my fall. Oh, also, I really like cats. My favorite parts of a cat are the soft pads on their feet. Sometimes when I think no one is looking, I’ll squeeze a cat’s paws and make baby noises and make faces at the cat. Passersby might think I’m strange, but the cat and I both know we’re bonding. Also, I keep a bunch of magic scrolls around my neck. They look like they would be a really powerful weapon in battle, but they’re actually a souvenir my sister bought for me when she went on a school trip to visit Mt. Fuji. But, still it looks cool, right? But don’t worry, I actually do have a power at my disposal! Other than my good looks and charming personality, I also have a demonically possessed left arm! The one draw back is that even though the possession symbols look pretty cool and intimidating up close (I can even rearrange them to spell out threatening messages or my grocery lists!) the demon that’s in there… is actually a wood whittling demon. No, that isn’t code or some sort of obscure double entendre. When I take off the shackle that keeps the demon in check, he’ll start whittling down all wood around him into animals or scenes from his favorite movies. In fact, the whole reason I wear the limiter at all is because one night while I slept, the demon took over and whittled down an old man’s wooden cabin into a series of 1/100th scale model DeLoreans just because he’d seen Back to the Future that day. You might be saying to yourself, “Why, my dear Mister Freckles, that’s a rather narrowly specific superhero ability, don‘t you think”, but believe you me, there will come a time when my ability to whittle an accurate reenactment of the Last Supper using only my left arm will mean the difference between life and death!

( I currently live in my Host's subconscious when I'm not up and about in the Real World. Please excuse all of the white lights in the background and foreground. Those are just the ghosts that share the Nightmare Carnival with me. On an unrelated note, if you happen to know of someone with a sunny disposition that isn't currently being embodied by a magical being, please let me know.)

Oh, yeah! The most relevant thing about myself! Why I’m here. I should probably say it’s because I really want social change, but that would be yet another lie and I’ve already got some really shaky karma as it is, so I’ll tell the truth: I don’t really have a choice. Jobs in the Spirit World are rather scarce, but I figured since I’ve got a few superhuman abilities, I could make a living here and maybe make a difference while I'm at it. I might not seem all that powerful, but I’ve got guts and belief in my own abilities!

What? I don’t sound like a good superhero?! You shouldn’t be so judgmental before you get to know me! Didn’t your momma ever teach you to not judge a book by its cover?! Give me a chance, you’ll see!

Wherever I Go, She Goes

2010-09-07T20:57:00.000-07:00

( My current host hates having her picture taken, so this accurate, almost photo realistic drawing will have to do. Next to her is our cat Moshi. He is soft and warm, but he is also the reincarnation of a yakuza boss so he is mean. He only smiles after a fresh kill.)
    At some point, I'm sure we've all asked ourselves, "Why are we here?" In my case, that answer is pretty straight forward: my host, Sandi L., happens to live here and it's cheaper to live in her head than to get an apartment. To get around, I sometimes “borrow” my host’s physical presence in order to do important superhero things: sometimes I attempt to save people in distress, but most of the time I go to the grocery store because she can’t be bothered to keep a well stocked fridge. But just who is this mysterious young woman?
    Actually, I lied, she’s not all that mysterious at all. She says she’s a Graphic Design and Computer Science double major at the local university, but all I’ve ever really seen her do is read romantic comic books and watch videos on the Internet. Sandi likes people to think she’s a realist, always insisting on wanting a “proper, practical and profitable” career, but she’ll come crying like a big snotty baby into the arms of the fantastical whenever things go wrong.
    She draws comics that she won’t ever let anyone read, but dreams about one day making it as a comic artist. She loves looking at baby animals, but she breaks out in a stress rash whenever she’s around young human children. She learns foreign languages so she‘ll be ready when she travels, even though she hates to travel. She likes making lots of friends even though she will probably grow up to become a hermit mad scientist and be the first to weaponize kangaroos. She likes it when there are lots of green things in her room even though she thinks Mother Nature has cooties. She likes cooking even though there are only a few dishes that she can cook well. She loves researching the occult even though she doesn’t believe in the supernatural. She’ll dress practically all while in her head she wishes she looked good in cute frilly dresses. She has girlishly low self-esteem but at the same time manages to have an unjustifiably large amount of pride in herself and everything she’s ever done.
    She’s as big a mish mash of conflicting attributes as any other human I’ve ever met. But it makes my job easier. She isn’t in the least bit shocked, scared or surprised at being the alter ego for a superhero. In fact, she just says she’s read better plots in fan fiction and to only bother her with the details when I come up with something more interesting.
    We’re just a pair of pessimists with a penchant for apathy. If the fate of the world is ever dependant on either of us becoming suddenly altruistic, I would get started on a plan B if I were you. For the most part, we’re too preoccupied coming up with ways to pay the bills from month to month to worry about the world at large. But maybe, just maybe, between the two of us, as uselessly selfish as we are individually, we might be able to accomplish a little good in this world.