The Raven's Spell

When You Grow Beyond Your Boundaries

2012-03-01T16:02:23Z

On Monday I posted about my strange and surprising personal growth that has occurred over the last few months. I wasn’t expecting it, which is likely why it happened, but I am so going to roll with the punches.

With my emerging evolution, I no longer find I fit into the niche I have built here at The Raven’s Spell. I already mentioned that the label of “divorced” seems useless and stated that I have no idea where my spirituality lies (more from a standpoint of how to explain it than any actual internal confusion).

Sadly, that is the very niche I have created at The Raven’s Spell.

In addition, Matthew will be reaching the double digits this month and I find it increasingly difficult to discuss him openly on the blog, as well as finding that with his new level of independence, I have a great deal more time to focus on myself and my interests.

So, it is with regret that I am here today to let you know that I will no longer be actively posting at The Raven’s Spell.

Yet, my blogging adventures are not complete. With my evolution, I have discovered that I am so much more than what I allowed here at this blog.

Therefore, I hope you will all take the time to visit me at my new home

Dare 2 Dream Dare 2 Do is all about becoming what you might have been, you know before kids, family, etc became the priority and fear jumped in the way. I will be discussing travel, my journey to physical/emotional/spiritual well-being, blogging and how we can be a force for change in the world.

I really do hope you take the time to stop on over and I hope you decide to follow.

I greatly appreciate absolutely each and every person who has ever visited The Raven’s Spell and I hope that our relationship continues.

Sincerely,

Jacki

The Evolution of Self

2012-02-22T17:31:58Z

Something happened to me recently that I just can’t explain. Somehow, I began looking in the mirror and decided to make changes. And I did just that.

I have felt like my life was at a crossroads for a very, very long time. I was weighed down with uncertainty, fear, and anxiety. I mean, come on, who likes change? Even if that change is good for us. Cause, maybe it won’t be.

Around November I decided I was tired of wishing and longing and picked one thing to change. I have wanted to start playing soccer again for so long that I ache each season I coach. My excuse, as always, been that I am just not in shape enough to play the game.

So I started a program with a physical trainer once a week. You know what happened?

I started moving, and I started moving in so many areas of my life.

I no longer feel like a divorced pagan mom waiting for my life to begin.

Divorced, yep, still divorced, but I no longer feel like this is an accurate label for who I am. It is a process I underwent and while I live with that process every day, I am not that box on the form. I am so much more than divorced.

Pagan, not so sure on that one. I will likely always use the term Pagan, but quite honestly, I have no idea what or where my spirituality is at this very moment. And quite honestly I am okay with that.

At this very moment, I feel like I am preparing to hatch. This winter has been all about incubating and growing and evolving and I know that soon, very, very soon, I will be spring forth from this egg that has sheltered me for way too long into something that I was always meant to be.

4 Tools for Procrastination

2012-02-16T16:44:43Z

I have this thing called a thesis to write, something due in about 4 weeks, and I am avoiding it like the plague due to fear and just plain stress.

I have found that when one wants to procrastinate, these 4 things work like a charm.

1. Pinterest. Not shocking to anyone

2. Google Reader. I have just added about a gazillion new blogs to my reader.

3. Words with Friends. Evil, pure evil.

4. Discovering how to use a Chrome extension to gather screen shots. Thank you Amy.

What about you? What helps you procrastinate?

The Raven’s Spell on Hiatus

2012-01-29T14:43:44Z

The new year is upon us, as well as what will hopefully be my last semester of graduate school. That means I am slaving away on a thesis and most, if not all, my creative juices are being drained away. While I complete my work and prepare to graduate, things here at The Raven’s Spell will likely be a little quite, with me only popping in and out on occasion.

Wish me luck, and keep following so you don’t miss any of my fleeting appearances.

5 Friday Favorites

2012-01-27T16:50:22Z

Each Friday I share with you my five favorite blog posts of the week. Perhaps they were heart-warming, silly, informative, or just plain fun. No matter what, they were ones that stuck with me and I want to share with you!

Real Rooms - If you are anything like me, you love a good home improvement and home design blog, and always feel like you could never, ever have a home that beautiful and perfect. I love when those perfect homes admit that things aren’t always so perfect. This great posts provides you with a collection of photos of real kids’ rooms. Now I don’t feel so incredibly bad.

Being the “Perfect Wife”: How I Handle a Cranky Spouse – as a Pagan, finding bloggers who write about their Christian faith that don’t a) offend me or b) feel irrelevent is very difficult. Faith Permeating Life is the one exception I have found so far. I love this blog and how this blogger expresses her faith. I also love how she looks at the simplest things, like dealing with a cranky spouse, and finds the meaning it.

Holiday Traditions – Baking Christmas Cookies + Christmas Caroling - yes the post is a little late, but it is still fun, and the last few images on the post (of the adorable dog) are completely worth taking the time to check this out.

On being an object, and then not being an object - a powerful post about what life can be like when you are female.

Daughters of feminists with sparkly pink nails - well technically this was posted at the end of last week, but I found it after posting last week’s favorites. As a mother of a boy, the age appropriateness of make-up and nail polish is not an issue. However, as a stepmom, this issue is one that I have on my mind quite often and can’t do a dang thing about. The discussion that follows in the comment section is just as good as the post.

Doing Disney – HAKUNA MATATA

2012-01-24T18:14:06Z

As I prepare for my new venture in becoming an athlete, I sat down to schedule my workouts to see if I would be capable of running a half marathon this fall. I hit the week on the calendar that we will be in Disney World Resort and wondered if I would be able to keep to my schedule. The universe often knows our struggles better than we, and the very next day I received this guest post from Deanna at The Unnatural Mother. Hhhmm…

As we prepared to surprise our children with a vacation to the most magical place on earth, Disney World, I started to get anxious about one thing in particular, and no I wasn’t worried about my children getting on a plane for the first time, or if I’d have to get certified for CPR to revive them after we popped the surprise on them, or about packing for three people or getting to the airport on time or how the hell I would survive seven exhausting days at the most magical place on earth, nope didn’t worry about those things at all, what had me breaking out in hives was how the hell would I fit in my runs.

Yes my runs.

With all that goes into a trip like this I was worried about running. Silly, eh? Well, not for me! The thing is when I don’t run, I get antsy, cranky, and start to feel grumpy and dumpy, dumpy being the 8th Dwarf that I didn’t want to bring to Disney World.

Running balances me out. On a vacation where there will be plenty of indulgences, plenty of children melting down, plenty of snarky faces I’ll be making at my husband for not agreeing with me; getting in my runs jumped ahead of all the other crap I have to do before I get on the plane list became my top priority. It’s all I thought about, well that and the do I have enough clean underwear, do we need socks, is it really the happiest place on earth or is that just a load of crap?

As I was packing, taking the lizard to the reptile hotel, cleaning the house, and stopping the mail I told myself that I had to run every day, then I convinced myself that running six days would be fine, then I thought well if you get two days in you’ll be golden… I changed my mind more times than a baby’s diaper!

On the big day, we woke our kids up at 4:30 am, they were groggy and didn’t believe us at all; but after navigating through that, the trip to the airport, calming the boys for their first flight was easy, but then my husband had a near meltdown because we had to pay $150 to check our luggage and I had an epiphany, three days, yep I should run three days to keep myself balanced and calm as there’s no telling what other travel surprises were headed our way.

No sooner had I committed to three days when we went through airport security and my husband, who hasn’t flown in the Post 9/11 world, had to his shock and dismay throw out his entire carry-on case which was filled with toothpaste, deodorant, and mouthwash. Now granted, I hadn’t flown in the Post 9/11 world either, but as my hubby fumed with a capital F, I secretly laughed my ass off and committed to five days of vacation running.

We made it to Disney World, toured the beautiful Animal Kingdom Lodge and there he was, my new BFF, the absolutely fabulous gym. I was stoked. Beyond stoked. We all know that a beautiful resort gym makes a big difference to actually getting your workouts in; with a gym like that I knew I’d be able to accomplish my task.

During vacation I got up at the crack of dawn and managed three gym runs, and one outdoor mile with my seven year old – so we could explore the animals on the other side of the resort. I was happy with my runs, and on the days when I was way too tired to get up, I made sure that I did laps in the pool or made everyone walk a little more than we had to; one day I clocked our routes and we had walked over six miles!

Overall the vacation was fantastic, the parks were so much fun, we had almost no melt downs and I firmly believe that because I ran I kept my eating in check, my emotions in check and that kept me balanced and centered so that when my hubby was so grumpy that he needed to hop in a cab to purchase snacks for the hotel room, or when my sons were so excited that they spoke in such high pitched tones only dogs could hear them or when I had to ask the resort to switch our rooms because there were no animals on our side of the lodge as my seven year old kept pointing out, I handled each and every travel surprise like a pro and that meant we returned from our vacation as the happy family that we really are.

Vacations are about relaxing and spending time with the people you love, but the most important person you have to spend quality time with is yourself, whether it be a walk, a run, swimming laps or stealing away to read a book. What I learned was that on vacation or at home I have to make sure I take care of myself so I can handle taking care of everyone else.

And yes, Disney World is the happiest place on earth especially when this Momma got her runs in and was able to maintain a Hakuna Matata worry free philosophy for the entire vacation.

The name “The Unnatural Mother” came to Deanna a little over seven years ago when her first son was born. She was told that her maternal instincts would kick in as soon as the baby came flying out of her vajayjay. Seven years later, a ton of gray hair and Deanna is still waiting for those maternal instincts to kick her in the ass! In the meantime, she writes, runs, and manages the stress of working full time, spaghetti on the ceiling, a dumped out fish bowl, a lizard, two active boys, being a wife to an incredible husband who tends to bust her chops better than the kids, which of course, leaves her no time to clean the house. To catch more on how Deanna tries to get it all done without completely failing visit her at The Unnatural Mother.