The Reality of Anxiety

7 Tips for Reducing Gym Anxiety

2010-03-16T19:57:00.001-06:00

I decided I would spend some time implementing important new habits in my life that would help me to be healtheir- which in turn would help my anxiety. Mr. T and I got gym memberships because they have a daycare and that works best for our little busy body toddler.

However, I find myself feeling VERY insecure at the gym. I usually prefer working out at home for this reason, but I didn't realize just how much I cared about it.

The first few times I went I actually put makeup on and did my hair. I bought new workout clothes.

I select my treadmill by finding one in front of a large pillar holding the ceiling up. This way I don't have to be as concerned about people directly behind me watching me. The mirrors on the side portray a dreadful figure staring back at me, and all I can think of is how everyone there is looking at me and laughing.

I made a note to look around for these horrible judgemental people, and not a single person was looking around like I was. Everyone was focused on their workout. Why couldn't I?

I turn on some tunes to try to distract my thoughts, but my eyes are continually looking around. My arm gets caught on my headphones and pulls my ipod out of the container and it falls on the treadmill and conveyors to the floor. So mortifying! I guess it could have been worse. I could have fallen and conveyed to the floor.

"What levels has she set on her treadmill? She is so pretty, I am so embarrassed to be near her! I have no clue what I am doing. Should I have worn this?"

I don't want to give into the insecurities and cancel my membership because I know that will only feed my fears and make it harder to go in the future. So I plan to stick it out until I feel comfortable working out by myself alongside all the beautiful toned women.

So as usual, I decided to do some research. I found these tips to help with gym anxiety (sure enough I am doing it all wrong!):

1. Take a friend with you. I think it is less nerve-wracking to go to the gym with a friend. You won’t be so focused on yourself and what everyone else thinks of you if you have a friend working out alongside you.

2. If you cannot bring a friend with you to the gym, bring some music to listen to while you workout. Bring an MP3, iPod, or Discman with you to the gym to listen to while you exercise. Listening to music while you exercise will energize you and help you keep focused during your workout.

3. Take a tour beforehand. When you sign up for a new gym, they will usually allow you to take a tour of the exercise room before you actually go in there to workout. Some gyms also give you a guide for your visit to show you how to work the machines and weights in the gym. If the gym you chose offers this service, I’d recommend taking advantage of it. It can be really helpful.

4. Wear something comfortable. Be sure to wear something you feel comfortable in to the gym. This will help you feel better about yourself.

5. Don’t look in the mirrors if you can help it. I was reading a study the other day that said people who go to gyms with mirrors in the workout room are less likely to keep going to the gym, so I don’t even know why they still put mirrors in there, but if you can help it, don’t look in the mirrors while you workout. Having some music might help you distract yourself from watching yourself workout in the mirror. Some gyms also have televisions you can watch while you workout.

A couple I have observed on my own:

6. Read a book while on the treadmill. I see lots of people doing that and want to try it out.
7. Hire a personal trainer. I would love this but they are too expensive for my budget. If you can, they will help you stay focused and motivated.

I also need some newer workout songs for my ipod- any good suggestions?

Do you ever feel insecure at the gym? What do you do to reduce the anxiety?

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Last Day of the Giveaway

2010-03-01T17:49:00.000-07:00

I have decided that rather than do a new monthly challenge for March, I am going to continue to focus on getting healthy for another month. I want to feel comfortable with my goals before moving onto the next thing and this one is a hard one to implement. I am going to the gym, but it doesn't feel like a normal routine yet. I am trying to eat healthier and drink more water, but I want to keep working at it.

However, tomorrow is the last day to enter the giveaway. Sign up now for your free online therapy session!

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Just What I Needed to Hear Today

2010-02-23T23:25:00.001-07:00

Why Does Heavenly Father Love Us?

"Think of the purest, most all-consuming love you can imagine. Now multiply that love by an infinite amount—that is the measure of God’s love for you.
God does not look on the outward appearance. I believe that He doesn’t care one bit if we live in a castle or a cottage, if we are handsome or homely, if we are famous or forgotten. Though we are incomplete, God loves us completely. Though we are imperfect, He loves us perfectly. Though we may feel lost and without compass, God’s love encompasses us completely.
He loves us because He is filled with an infinite measure of holy, pure, and indescribable love. We are important to God not because of our résumé but because we are His children. He loves every one of us, even those who are flawed, rejected, awkward, sorrowful, or broken. God’s love is so great that He loves even the proud, the selfish, the arrogant, and the wicked.
What this means is that, regardless of our current state, there is hope for us. No matter our distress, no matter our sorrow, no matter our mistakes, our infinitely compassionate Heavenly Father desires that we draw near to Him so that He can draw near to us."

Dieter F. Uchtdorf, “The Love of God,” Ensign, Nov 2009, 21–24

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A Couple Healthy Breakfast Ideas

2010-02-18T22:46:00.000-07:00

We all know that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. It should never be skipped. Eating right away when you wake up gets your metabolism going which will help you lose weight, and can regulate blood sugar levels which can relieve morning anxiety.

Here are some yummy but healthy breakfast ideas I have found in The Biggest Loser Family Cookbook:

Banana Split for Breakfast?

On top two banana halves, substitute ice cream with fat-free, sugar-free vanilla yogurt. Add some fresh cut strawberries, a tablespoon of crunchy high fiber, low sugar cereal (such as Grape Nuts) and some fat-free, sugar-free hot fudge.

Your looking at a YUMMY breakfast that's only 195 calories.

Smoothies:

Instead of using Fresh fruit and ice cubes to make a smoothie, skip the ice and use frozen fruit. That way you don't have to worry about your fruit going bad or that your smoothie will be too watery. You can use fresh fruit in season and freeze it yourself or you can buy the packaged varieties.

Make your own smoothies instead of going to the smoothie bars. If you look at the nutritional value of their smoothies, they can pack upwards of 600-800 calories and tons of sugar!

Ever heard of green smoothies? I hadn't until I saw this video of Robyn from Green Smoothie Girl. It has me very interested since vegetables are really hard to get down any of my family member's throats. I don't think my blender would work but maybe I could throw in a few baby spinach leaves next time...

Do you have any healthy breakfast tips or ideas? Whats your favorite?

Don't forget to sign up for the free online therapy giveaway! First come first serve, so anyone can still win...

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5 Tips for Starting an Anxiety Reducing Exercise Program

2010-02-09T22:11:00.000-07:00

There is a poll on the sidebar right now about how often people exercise. I am surprised to see that it varies all over from NEVER exercising (that's the one I chose) to everyday!

Mr. T and I decided to get gym memberships to follow through with our goal of being more healthy and exercising. And more specifically, I am expecting it to help me reduce my anxiety. This is the best option for us because the gym has a child center where Lil' P can play while we work out. It also has a rock climbing area which we love. A little while back I had my first day at the gym.

I got to start out with a personal trainer who assessed my fitness levels. Overall, it appeared on paper as though I was in pretty good shape. However, when I started an actual workout I ran into a problem. After any exercise set my heart rate would skyrocket into the 170's. I had to wait for a few minutes everytime for my heart rate to go back down before I could continue. The trainer explained that my heart is really out of shape and that I need to do more cardio to get it used to working out. He suggested 20-30 minutes 2-3 times a week.

I am so out of shape that I couldn't move for the next two days. I was soooo sore! I have a lot of work to do.

Here are a few of my favorite tips (from The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook) for starting a new exercise program in order to reduce anxiety:

Expect some initial discomfort. If you are out of shape, aches and pains are normal. As your strength and endurance grow, the pain will pass.
Ideally exercise should be aerobic.
Optimal frequency is 4-5 times a week with 20-30 minute sessions.
Optimal intensity for aerobic exercise is a heart rate of (220-your age) X .75 for at least 10 minutes.
Avoid exercising only once a week. Infrequent spurts of exercise is stressful to your body and generally does more harm than good. (walking is an exception).

Don't forget to sign up for the free online therapy giveaway! First come first serve, so anyone can still win...

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Healthy Swap: Drink More Water, Less Caffeine

2010-02-02T22:05:00.001-07:00

Never would I do this if I wasn't contractionally obligated. I hate being on camera. Too many imperfections and too much to judge. Every month I have to post a video on The Nitty Gritty of Anxiety. So even though I cringe when watching it, I decided since it goes along with the monthly challenge, I might as well share it here as well. I learned that I am no where near drinking the amount of water that I am supposed to. So the first thing I am doing this month to get healthier is to drink more water!

Joe Barry Mc Donagh from ezine articles says this,

"Nearly every function of the body is monitored and pegged to the efficient flow of water through our system. Water transports hormones, chemical messengers, and nutrients to vital organs of the body. When we don't keep our bodies well-hydrated, they may react with a variety of signals such as anxiety, which we would never think are related to our poor drinking habits."

And only for The Reality of Anxiety readers, here is where I got my information about the dangers of caffeine for anxiety suffers, and a diet to help eliminate anxiety.

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A Giveaway! Free online therapy sessions!

2010-02-01T05:00:00.069-07:00

WebEMDR.com is an on line provider of EMDR therapy for anxiety, stress,depression and PTSD. According to their website, EMDR is "Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, or EMDR, is a powerful new short-term psychotherapy technique which has been very successful in helping people who suffer from trauma, anxiety, panic, disturbing memories, post traumatic stress and many other emotional problems. Until recently, these conditions were difficult and time-consuming to treat. EMDR is considered a breakthrough therapy because of its simplicity and the fact that it can bring quick and lasting relief for most types of emotional distress."

These sessions usually cost $18.00 each but they are giving 100 free sessions away to the loyal readers of The Reality of Anxiety!

How to get one of these free sessions:

Become a new follower either by subscribing via RSS or email, or by "following" the blog through blogger, or following through twitter. You will have to let me know if you do this by leaving me a comment with your email address and how you joined.
Leave a note on the discussion forum. This can be a response to someone else or a new topic altogether. Again I need an email address so I can contact you if you win.
Join the monthly challenge. Let me know you are joining by leaving a comment and what you plan to accomplish this month (plus your email address).

Disclaimer: All winners need to send me a valid email address so that they can be contacted of winnings and also to set up their session. I have been guaranteed that your email address will not be emailed by the company after your free session. There is no after session marketing or sharing of your email address. Only one free session per person.

These will be given away in first-come-first-serve style so hurry and enter!

This giveaway will be valid until March 2, 2010 (30 days).

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Monthly Challenge: February 2010- Let's Get Healthy!

2010-01-30T22:16:00.005-07:00

I've procrastinated this goal for awhile now, mostly because the holidays were not when I wanted to start, but also because I am scared to make this lifestyle change! I don't believe in diets. I think being healthy is an everyday thing, not just every once in awhile. And my general health is in bad shape.

Not sure if you are out of shape? Here are some common symptoms:

Being out of breath or having a long recovery time after walking up a flight of stairs
Feeling exhausted after short periods of exertion
Chronic muscle tension
Poor muscle tone
Obesity
Muscles cramped and aching for days after participating in a sport
General tiredness, lethargy, boredom

This month, I want to challenge all of you to join me in making personal adjustments in your lifestyle to better your health. I plan to focus on exercise ideas as well as diet changes such as drinking more water, healthy food swaps, recipes, and cooking tips, etc.

Edmund J. Bourne says, "One of the most powerful and effective methods for reducing generalized anxiety and overcoming a disposition to panic attacks is a program of regular, vigorous exercise...Exercise is a natural outlet for your body when it is in the fight-or-flight mode of arousal...Regular exercise also diminishes the tendency to experience anticipatory anxiety toward phobic situations, expediting recovery from all kinds of phobias, ranging from fear of public speaking to fear of being alone."

I hope since I gave the challenge away early that you have had enough time to think about what you want to do. An exercise program is a commitment that shouldn't be done by flying by the seat of your pants. It will differ for everyone depending on your health goals. There's running, swimming, cycling, aerobics, walking, strength training, exercising at home, joining a gym, etc. So many options!

As always, I'll share what I am up to and what I find helpful. I'd love to hear from you if you plan to join the challenge, and what you will try to do. You can leave a comment below or I have created a new topic in the Discussion Forum where we can share tips, recipes, fun workout ideas, etc.

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Photo provided by:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/pinksherbet/ / CC BY 2.0

Adding Twitter, Facebook, and Followers

2010-01-24T21:27:00.002-07:00

I have always been a fan of RSS feeds and have offered ways to subscribe to The Reality of Anxiety through feed readers and email. I've also attached links at the bottom of each post for StumbleUpon, Technorati, Digg, del.icio.us, and my yahoo! However, there are many people that use other popular methods of tracking their favorite blogs such as Twitter, Facebook, and Blogger's Followers widget. All are methods of sharing information. And I want you to be able to access The Reality of Anxiety however is best for you, so I have added functionality that will allow you to do just that. You will notice share buttons at the beginning of each post for Facebook and Twitter, and a Followers widget along the sidebar. If it starts to get too crowded I will remove the less used ones, but I think I've spaced them out okay. Let me know if you like the updates, or if its all just too confusing!

Share and Read On!

P.S. There may be some issues since I am new to these- for instance the tweet button on each post defaults to one- not sure why, still trying to figure it out. If you have any problems using the new features just let me know.

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Chronic Stress Equals More Belly Fat!?!

2010-01-20T05:00:00.006-07:00

Are you an apple or a pear?

I find myself in a weird and unfamiliar predicament. All my life I have been too skinny. Even after having my daughter I dropped the weight pretty quickly. After the holidays and all the food filled parties, I weigh the most I ever have (besides when pregnant) and although I want to gain weight, I don't like where it is showing up. All of it is in my belly and hips, whereas my arms and legs are still sticks! I look very disproportionate. But I guess beggars can't be choosers.

I took a look at my eating habits and lack of exercise and found LOTS of room where I can improve. I also came across this article that explains the difference in body shapes. An apple, vs. a pear (gaining weight in your midsection vs. gaining weight in your thighs and buns):

"We crunch. We Ab Blast. We eschew carbs. Heck, we'll even go under the knife to get rid of ab flab.
Unfortunately, recent research shows that you can crunch until you crumble and diet till you're drained of energy, but if your days are full of stress, the perfect six-pack--or even a flatter midsection--will continue to elude you.
That's because fat in the abdominal area functions differently than fat elsewhere in the body. It has a greater blood supply as well as more receptors for cortisol, a stress hormone. Cortisol levels rise and fall throughout the day, but when you're under constant stress, the amount of the hormone you produce remains elevated. With high stress and, consequently, high cortisol levels, more fat is deposited in the abdominal area since there are more cortisol receptors there.

But ab flab is not the only price you'll pay for chronic stress (the kind created by a marriage that's unraveling, a job you hate, problems with your health--rather than, say, tension caused by a traffic snarl). Chronically high cortisol levels also kill neurons in the brain and interfere with feel-good neurotransmitters--such as dopamine and serotonin--which can lead to depression and feeling more stressed.
More stress = more fat
In short, the whole issue of abdominal fat goes far beyond how you look in a bikini: The fat at your waist--what researchers call central obesity--is associated with higher rates of cardiovascular disease, type 2 diabetes and several types of cancer. And while it's true that heredity plays a role in overall body type (that is, whether you are more of an "apple" than a "pear"), says Brenda Davy, Ph.D., R.D., an assistant professor at Virginia Tech in Blacksburg, "genetics accounts for only 25-55 percent of the tendency to develop the most serious diseases associated with abdominal fat--the remainder is lifestyle."'

Knowing that the odds are stacked against me, I am taking some steps to get my body in less of an apple shape, and more of an hourglass shape :)

Monthly Challenge Update

I took a break from the monthly challenges in January, mainly because life has been so busy I needed the time to really figure out what was next. Starting February first, I will do another monthly challenge, this time for being more healthy.

Why am I telling you this now? Because in order to have success, a trendy diet isn't going to work. Being healthy is a LIFESTYLE change. And that's what this is all about. Changing our lives and health for the better. Take some time and think about how you can be more healthy and what you are realistically willing to do. If you want to start exercising, than what program will work best for you? Is it a gym membership? Is it a treadmill in your home? Will you start jogging? What kind of changes can you make to your diet?

Some stuff to think about. Oh by the way, there will be a giveaway as well :)

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The Nitty Gritty of Anxiety at HealthyPlace

2010-01-18T05:00:00.009-07:00

A little while ago I did an online television interview with the people over at HealthyPlace. They have asked me to start an anxiety blog on their site to help contribute to their anxiety and panic community. I agreed graciously, as this opportunity will allow me to reach out and hopefully help more people. The blog is called The Nitty Gritty of Anxiety and I will blog there twice a week, as well as have audio and video posts occasionally. I like to think of it as a sister site to The Reality of Anxiety, since I plan to continue blogging here as well. The two blogs are very different however. The Nitty Gritty of Anxiety is a more formal place with several blogs in the mental health category, all with the look and feel of the rest of the HealthyPlace site. So far the posts are mostly just my history which most of you already know. You may notice they still have a few wrinkles to iron out. The Reality of Anxiety is my own little corner of the internet where I can express myself however I want, being as creative with my design and posts as I want. Both will be worth reading! They are announcing the new blogs today. Check it out and let me know what you think. But please come back!

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This One's For the Girls: A Tool for Anxiety and Aunt Flo

2010-01-16T16:30:00.003-07:00

Sorry men, but you are going to want to stop reading right. about. now.

Seriously. You don't want to keep reading.

I've heard that your anxiety can worsen depending on your menstruation cycle. I never really put much thought into it until today when I was using a site that I normally use for fertility purposes. It's called My Monthly Cycles. Its a really cool website that has a lot of free features as well as premium services if you are interested. I used it to help get pregnant with my first baby. You can track you period cycles, it will let you know when you are ovulating and fertile, and the part I want to talk about today- you can also track your menstrual symptoms. It has a list of symptoms you may feel- nausea, headache, moodiness, ANXIETY, and more with a radial button to list how light or severe the symptoms are. The idea behind this is that over time of logging in a few period cycles, it will begin to predict what symptoms you may experience in the future. So if at the beginning of your cycle if you are really moody, tired, and have some crying spells, it will let you know when your next cycle will start and those symptoms you will have so YOU CAN PREPARE. I say this, because it has the option of choosing your anxiety levels during the month as well. How cool is that?!? Over time, it can tell you when you are most likely to be anxious, allowing you time to prepare for any rough days that lie ahead.

Even if you only want to use this to track your anxiety and nothing else, I think that would still work. I think this is such a great tool to keep in our back pockets.

Enjoy!

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Warning: An Anxiety Free Post

2010-01-11T13:28:00.001-07:00

I don't usually do this, but today's post has absolutely nothing to do with anxiety whatsoever. It does however, have to do with keeping New Year's Resolutions, and one that I kept for 2009. I mentioned earlier how I wanted to display more of my photography in my home and so I created a photo wall. Some of you asked to see pictures. So here you go:

The wall vinyl says "We do not remember days, we remember moments."

Being the perfectionist I am, I can't just show this to you without all of the buts and disclaimers. It's not entirely finished. As I mentioned I still need to fill up the last canvas of a close up of my husband. Also, I need to get better hook ups for the back so they will stay level. Currently they move a lot and look crooked. The family pic in the middle isn't my favorite, but its the only recent one that we have. Since there are only 3 of us it is a little redundant, so as we have more children I will swap some out for pictures of them, and I would like to get some nice pictures of our pets for one of them as well. I couldn't stick to a theme of all black and white, or all color, or all sepia because each picture looks best in a certain way and so I decided to just mix it up so that I could showcase my favorite pictures how they look best.

Just so you can see how it relates to the room.

If you want to know how I did it- instead of paying $150 for each print to be turned into canvas prints, I had shutterfly send me the 16 X 20 prints. I used craft paint to paint the sides of the canvases (black, brown, or cream to match the picture) and then I modge- podged the prints onto the canvases. I didn't modge-podge the tops of the prints, only to glue the print to the canvas. Then I sanded the sides of the prints to make it look a little more worn and to make them fit better. This process cost only about $30 for each which is much better for my budget. (I got the canvases all at half prince at my local Hobby Lobby).

I edited all of the pictures myself, but only took the ones without me in them of my daughter and hubby. My coworker and friend and my hubby took the others.

If you have done anything similar to this or have a way to show us your finished resolutions from last year, leave a link in your comments so we can check it out!

Thanks for looking!

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New Year's Resolutions

2010-01-07T15:33:00.001-07:00

Every year when January 1st rolls around I have a whole list of resolutions for every aspect of my life. I guess its the perfectionist in me, as there is a never ending list in my head as to how I can improve. Then, as long as I actually complete one resolution, I am happy. Its sort of fail safe.

Last year one of my resolutions was to display some of my pictures that I take in my home. I came up with a photo wall of 9 16 X 20 canvas prints that I love. I have one left that I need to still fill of my hubby (getting him to do a photo shoot of only him will be a miracle). But it was a lot of work and took a long time to accumulate the photos and put it all together. So I am happy.

This year, I want to do a lot more for my home. Turning my house into a home kinda stuff. I have my toe dipped into so many little ventures, I would like to take one of them and run with it. Turn it into something bigger. As for my health, I have a lot of ideas for the site, but I haven't made any real goals for myself. I am still trying to master the once a week yoga. The holidays kinda took me off of that one, whoops!

I have spiritual goals and family goals, but they too come with roadblocks that make it hard. And I've decided I don't want to put too much pressure on myself. Make life simpler so as not to get so overwhelmed. So I think the simplest way for me this year is to sum all of my goals into one mission statement if you will:

To spend my time with people that I love, doing activities that I love, that make myself and my family happy.

Remembering that will help me to stay focused on where I should be.

Any New Year's Resolutions for you?

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It's Official- the Shop is OPEN!

2010-01-04T00:00:00.002-07:00

I just wanted to announce that I have posted some fun necklaces or pendants for sale at the new Reality of Anxiety Shop! You can see the widget on the top left side of the blog, or you can get there by clicking here. I only posted 4 items so far so I can get an idea of how much interest there is before I go all crazy and bust a ton more out. Although I do have some that are already made that I haven't posted that say "Bring It On" "I Can" and "Calm".

I don't want to just have necklaces, so I can do any of them as pendants as well that you can use for a keychain, a phone accessory, etc.

Also, I have been toying with the idea of creating customized journals as well. Journaling was the first thing I did to try to cope with the anxiety. I carried that thing around with me everywhere and flipped through the pages for references all the time. I listed my affirmations and important things I wanted to remember when not by my computer or not at home with all of my books. I am a crazy scrapbooker and so I may put some of it to use in the future.

As I've mentioned before, everything can be customized to say whatever you would like including names, phrases, and dates. Just let me know!

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Happy New Year!

2010-01-03T17:02:00.001-07:00

I know I am a few days late, but I want to wish everyone a Happy New Year from our family to yours! I hope you all had a wonderful Holiday and have a promising outlook for Twenty Ten.

This past year of the Reality of Anxiety has been greater than I ever imagined and mostly because of you all. You truly are the motivation that keeps me trying to improve and blogging. So, to the Readers of the Reality of Anxiety, I'd just like to say....

Thank you for simply stopping by
Thank you for the motivating and kind comments
Thank you for inspiring me to try new things
Thank you for your input and inquiries
Thank you for spreading hope
Thank you for participating in all of my ventures
Thank you for creating friendships
Thank you for just being you.

Happy New Year!

Love,
Aimee, Tyler, and Peyton

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Display your Affirmations on Washer Necklaces!

2009-12-30T22:31:00.001-07:00

I have had an epiphany. I am so excited to share it with you, I can't stand it. I just hope you like the idea as much as I do.

I used to work in an office 40 hours a week and would struggle with my anxiety every day in my cubicle. I didn't want everyone in the office to know about my personal health so I would post pictures of random things that no one else would know the meaning of but me. For example, I used to have a picture of a footprint in the sand. This was to remind me whenever I saw it of the affirmation "I can take as small a step forward as I choose. There is no need to push myself." Everytime I glanced at the picture I would think of that. I had a sticker of an upper case "R" on my computer monitor. This was to remind me of the positive affirmation "I respect and believe in myself more than other people's opinions."

This worked great while I worked in the office. Then as a work at home mom, I would post the affirmations around my bedroom and bathroom. However I found it embarrasing if any guests came over if they saw it.

So this idea is a way to carry those thoughts with you all the time- at home, at work, and on the go. Simply wear them as a necklace!

I have created these really cool hand stamped customized washer necklaces that are really popular in the crafting community. It started out as putting my child's name on one and making some as Christmas gifts with family names and birthdates. Then I started to think about other things I could stamp into them and I thought of phrases that could help with anxiety such as:

"BE STILL"

"CALM"

"BELIEVE"

"AT PEACE"

"SERENITY"

just to name a few. But really, ANYTHING can be stamped into these necklaces. Initials, numbers, phrases. These can be worn underneath clothing for privacy, or they can be as stand-outish as you want with additional charms and beads. I only have one picture on here to give you an idea of what I am talking about, but there are so many other styles that I can do as well.

So here's the thing. I decided I would share these with anyone that is interested. I have set up an etsy shop

and will be posting these necklaces for sale in the very, very, very near future. I will probably only post a few to see what kind of interest there is. So if there is something you hold dear to you that helps you find hope, encouragement, or valuable affirmations, let me know and I can make it for you. All the details will be in the shop but I wanted to let you know it was coming so you could swirl the idea around in your head.

I hope everyone has a Happy New Year! Are you thinking of resolutions that you want to do for 2010? I know I have. I am a believer in them. Do they work for you or stress you out?

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Grinching Christmas

2009-12-26T13:26:00.002-07:00

I don't know why I am suprised, but the last few days for me have been filled with anxiety. I never even thought seriously about preparing for the family get togethers. So wouldn't you know it Christmas Eve morning when I am supposed to go to a family Who-ville Christmas Breakfast, I am in pure panic mode in my closet. "What if I am sick and can't eat anything and I ruin the breakfast? I know its so important to my sister and I didn't want to be a downer..." and on my thoughts raced.

I tried to login to the website but my computer's battery was dead. So I decided to nip it in the bud instead of letting it draw out all day long. I simply called my sister up and told her that I was having a lot of anxiety and we would still come, but I may not be able to eat much since I wasn't feeling good. Worst case scenario, I could put it all in a doggy bag and eat it later.

There- it was out in the open, she knew, and I didn't have to try to be perfect anymore. And then the wave of anxiety quieted. That was the worst of it. I still had more ripples here and there, but no more panic attacks. Christmas morning and this morning I found myself uneasy, but nothing overly serious.

I am always a mess during the holidays. I get so wrapped up in how they need to be perfectly memorialized events that the thought of me ruining them with my anxiety always creeps in. I am my own Christmas Grinch. For some reason I feel that if I am sick, it will ruin it for everybody. When in reality, if I was really sick, it would really ruin the holidays for me, and most likely just me.

So I will say it again, being open and honest about your panic and anxiety with those around you always seems to be better for me than trying to hide it and pretending like everything is just fine.

How was the Christmas holiday for everyone else?

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Featured in SELF Magazine January 2010 edition

2009-12-21T17:19:00.002-07:00

Browsing through Costco today for some last minute Christmas gifts I saw the new SELF magazine edition for January and hurried to flip through the pages to see if my article was there. Sure enough, on page 120 a little paragraph about anxiety and my experience with sleeping. I was so stoked!

Don't want to buy the magazine but want to check it out? Click here to see it online. They took a lot of information that I gave them and tried to summarize it all up in a few sentences so I feel as though its like seeing a movie without reading the book first. You get an idea of the plot but there are so many details missing. But its still pretty cool!

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Keeping the Focus on Others

2009-12-15T22:17:00.000-07:00

I have been trying to write out a long post about my service efforts for this month, but I can't help but not like the way it comes out. It's like the scripture in the Bible about saying your prayers in your closet, as opposed to the street corner where everyone can see you. If you say them in private you do it because its between you and Heavenly Father. If you brag about it, saying them loudly where everyone can hear how righteous you are, than you are doing it for everyone else's approval and that is your reward.

Matthew 6: 5-6
5 ¶ And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the ^ahypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.

6 But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy ^acloset, and when thou hast ^bshut thy door, ^cpray to thy Father which is in ^dsecret; and thy Father which ^eseeth in secret shall ^freward thee openly.

The idea of doing service this month is to take the focus off of yourself and think about others. Therefore, I don't want to sit and list the things I have been doing to get kudos or nice comments, because then it all goes back on me and my focus is lost.

So I will just say this. I am holding my end up on the monthly challenge by being more thoughtful for those around me and by helping a friend in need. Its been harder than I thought it would be, but I guess that's how all good behaviors are.

I hope you are finding the joy that comes with serving others. If you would like to share whether you participated in this month's challenge I would love to know, even if its just to say you did it.

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Happy Holidays From Our Family to Yours!

2009-12-12T08:16:00.002-07:00

I knew this month would be super busy with getting everything ready for Christmas, and I am so not even close to being done! However, I just finished this baby yesterday so I can get them out in the mail, and wanted to share it with you.

I hope you all have a great holiday season filled with the peace that we all strive so hard to obtain.

I still haven't figured out what service idea I am going to do this month. Anyone else done theirs? By the way in case anyone looked, I am not featured in the December issue of SELF, so I am almost positive it will be in the January issue.

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Monthly Challenge: December 2009- The Helper's High

2009-12-01T05:00:00.005-07:00

For the month of December I tried to come up with a reasonable challenge that wouldn't be too overwhelming with all of the holiday get togethers and celebrations taking up so much of our time. So I came up with the idea of having this month's challenge revolve around service. When you are feeling down, sad, or lonely, having a pity party for yourself, the BEST thing you can do is to forget about yourself, and focus on others. So much of our time is focused on analyzing ourselves, our thoughts, our feelings, our minds and bodies, that its a good exercise to turn our attention purposely elsewhere. This article entitled How Volunteerism Can Make You Healthier and Happier by R. Murali Krishna, M.D. really says it so much better than I can:

I recently received a letter from a man who told me of the impact I'd had on him when he attended one of the many seminars I offer throughout the country on the mind-body-spirit connection.

This man is now approaching mid-life, but when he was younger his mother suffered from manic depression. His mother's illness was so severe it eventually drove her to shoot and kill his father. This man who wrote me spent many years grappling with this family tragedy.
It haunts him still.
Eventually, however, he decided to cope with his own pain by serving others. After attending one of my seminars, he volunteered his services to a local hospice organization, a place where the terminally ill can die with dignity and peace.
Most of us are fortunate enough to avoid terrible tragedies. But each of us experiences pain, sadness and loneliness. One of the best ways to overcome these feelings is to connect with others through service.
It's one of the fundamental ways I suggest people can achieve balanced lives, whether through volunteering in the community or through finding a quieter connection with someone.
We must serve others to feel like human beings. Serving others provides a spiritual connection. Mother Theresa told us that God comes to us through suffering human beings. We can't all be Mother Theresa's. But we each possess inner strengths and talents given to us so we can share them to others.
A wave of volunteerism has swept America in recent years, with calls from prominent names like Colin Powell and Jimmy Carter. George Bush exhorted us to become one of the "thousand points of light" delivering comfort to those in need.
Such service certainly has altruistic rewards. It makes us less self-centered. It increases our empathy. It expands our life experiences beyond the narrow realm of what we encounter at work or on television. We gain a healthier perspective on life.

The Helper's High
Service and volunteerism may also have an impact beyond simply making us feel better about ourselves. Recent research suggests serving others can have a physical impact on your health. It's been called "the helper's high," and it may even have a positive effect on the immune system. Information in this area is still emerging, but a few studies stand out:

A 1988 study by the University of Michigan showed that life expectancy increases for people who volunteer (a 250 percent increase for men in the study).
Another study conducted over a ten-year period found a two-and-a-half-fold decrease in overall mortality for those who attended volunteer philanthropic group activities regularly when compared with those who did not volunteer.
The Duke Heart Center Patient Support Program at Duke University in North Carolina suggests that former cardiac patients who have volunteered to help newly-diagnosed patients may improve their own mood and alter their psychoneuroimmunological function (a technical term for the connection between the mind, the nervous system and the immune system).
A study of Japanese elderly found that, regardless of gender, those who provide assistance to others rated their health more favorably than older adults who were less involved in their communities.
More studies at Yale, Johns Hopkins, University of California, National Institute of Mental Health and Ohio State University support similar findings.
Why? Scientists theorize the good feelings that come from volunteering may release chemicals called neuropeptides that bolster the immune system and provide a sense of well-being.
Human biology seems to be designed in such a way that it drives us to satisfy our sensations. We want to own things. We want to taste savory food, to smell lovely fragrances, to hear beautiful music or to sleep on the softest sheets. We want to feel secure and comfortable.
There's nothing wrong with aspiring to fulfill these needs. After all, we are hardwired for desires and aspirations.

The Missing Link

Nevertheless, most people feel deep down that something is missing from their lives if they only focus on their own needs. Within each human being, I believe we possess a deep need to make a difference in the lives of others. Often, stress or the layers of obligations that can accumulate in our lives have buried this innate awareness. Serving others can stimulate this inner core once again, bringing it to life.
The social connection provided through serving others also makes us aware of fundamental truths, first among them: We are each born with a guaranteed return ticket. When you wrestle with this fact, you'll also begin to understand you are surrounded by fellow travelers – each with an ending no different from your own. Once you glimpse this certainty, you might allow yourself to ask, "What will be my ending? What can I contribute to aid other human beings as we travel through this life?"
Life is like a training ground. We learn the lessons we choose to engage in. Volunteering and serving others teach us the highest lessons with the noblest results. We learn that our lives have meaning. We raise ourselves to a purpose beyond our own immediate needs.
How to do it?
Make it a part of your daily life. Don't forego the other parts of your life – your family, your job, or your leisure time. And don't overload yourself with burdensome volunteer commitments. You won't be connecting with anyone, and you won't be reaping the physical and psychological benefits either. Objectively measure your time and your commitments.
At the same time, don't wait until the end of the year to simply write a check. Do something that has meaning for you.
The smallest actions can make a difference, accumulated over time. Each day, when I interact with someone, I try to offer a word of comfort or encouragement. I try to connect with people in the present moment. I try to create optimism. In this small way, I am not matching the enormous accomplishments of Mahatma Gandhi or Mother Theresa. But I am making a difference. I am serving others.
Simply being involved with your neighborhood association or in the philanthropic endeavors of your religious congregation can function in the same way. And these are easy ways to involve your family, too.

There is something essentially right about this balanced addition to our lives. You'll find making the time to serve others will provide you with more energy, instead of taking it away. And as medical research is beginning to suggest, you're likely to live a longer and happier life as a result.

So here it is- this month's challenge:

This month, do at least one act of service for someone else. It can be anything you want. From doing something extra nice or extra special for a member of your family, to donating your time at a soup kitchen or food bank or homeless shelter. Whatever you want to do. The idea is to forget about yourself and help others.

I want to hear what you have decided to do and what happened. How it made you feel, how it helped others, etc. Maybe we can get a cool collection of stories. I haven't decided what I am going to do yet, but I will keep you posted. I created a new post on the discussion forum, or if you would like you can leave a comment with your experience under this post.

Need Some Ideas for Inspiration?

Here are 30 to get you started:

Surprise your parent(s) or neighbors and offer to babysit a sibling, relative or friend.
Cheer up a sick friend with a visit or phone call.
Rescue a pet from an animal shelter.
Can't keep a pet? Volunteer at an animal shelter. Help clean up, play with the animals, or do whatever's needed to make the shelter a nicer "temporary" home for the animals.
Become a foster parent. Some shelters have temporary foster care programs. You take care of a pet until they can find a permanent home for it.
Ring the bell for Salvation Army during the holidays.
Christmas boxes for needy children/families
Clean someone's car (inside and out)
Clean someone's home
Cook meals for needy/elderly
Do someone's laundry
Donate blood
Donate clothes/toys/house hold items
Celebrate a birthday by asking friends to donate items for causes instead of gifts.
Give Christmas trees to needy at Christmas time or decorate a Christmas tree at a nursing home, hospital, school or homeless shelter.
Help out at shelters/hospitals/nursing homes
Make hygiene kits, or first aid kits (for shelters)
Litter cleanup (roads/parks)
Make stuffed toys/dolls for children
Read to elderly
Service Scavenger Hunt
Singing at hospitals/nursing homes
Story telling to children
Teach reading to the illiterate
Wash windows (members/church/other buildings/homes)
Yard cleanup (grass/weeds/leaves/snow/etc)
Clean an elderly neighbor's driveway and sidewalk after a snowfall.
Serve as a coach for a youth sports team.
Serve as an usher at a sporting event.
Adopt a pothole and raise funds to repair it.

These ideas as well as many others can be found here and here.

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Relaxation Technique 4: Envisioning a Peaceful Scene

2009-11-28T19:31:00.000-07:00

Some of you may remember Adam Sandler going to his "happy place' in the movie Happy Gilmore. Here's the script:

Chubbs: You must clear your mind
of everything else and stay focused.
                   
Happy Gilmore: How can I do that?
                   
Chubbs: Think of a place
that's really perfect.
                  
Your own happy place.
                   
Go there and all your anger
will disappear.

Although portrayed with humor, the idea is still a concrete one and works with more than just anger. It can help you with your anxious thoughts as well.

A peaceful scene could be envisioning yourself on a quiet beach, a stream in the mountains, laying in a meadow of wild flowers, sitting next to a cozy fire wrapped in a blanket on a cold winter day, or wherever you consider to be a peaceful place. As long as you can see everything in detail and completely absorb yourself in the setting, any place real or fantasy will do.

Edmund J. Bourne says, "Allowing yourself to be absorbed in a peaceful scene will deepen your state of relaxation, giving you actual physiological results. Your muscular tension lessens, your heart rate slows down, your breathing deepens, your capillaries open up and warm your hands and feet, and so on."

It helps to write out your peaceful scene on paper. Using all of your senses- sight, touch, sound, smell, and taste, describe the scene in full detail.

You can also record your voice describing what you have written so that you can conjour it up without effort.

Here is an example of a peaceful scene described by Edmund J. Bourne from The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook:

The Beach Scene

"You're walking along a beautiful, deserted beach. You are barefoot and can feel the firm white sand beneath your feet as you walk along the margin of the sea. You can hear the sound of the surf as the waves ebb and flow. The sound is hypnotic, relaxing you more and more. The water is a beautiful turquoise blue flecked with whitecaps far out where the waves are cresting. Near the horizon you can see a small sailboat gliding smoothly along. The sound of the waves breaking on the shore lulls you deeper and deeper into relaxation.You draw in the fresh, salty smell of the air with each breath. Your skin glows with the warmth of the sun.You can feel a gentle breeze against your cheek and ruffling in your hair. Taking in the whole scene you feel very calm and at ease."

Sigh. That seems so nice.

Once you have your own ideal peaceful scene imagined out, return to it whenever you finish any relaxation technique such as deep breathing or muscle relaxation for example. Over time this will enforce the image and it will solidify in your mind, making it easier to call upon on the spur of the moment and help to drive away anxious thoughts.

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And the Winners Are...

2009-11-24T13:40:00.000-07:00

I use a random contest winner generator at Buzz My Blog in order to pick winners for the giveaways at random. The three winners of the November's Relaxation Giveaway- new owners of the iphone app MiHeart, are:

Blue Morpho

Jes

Scott

Thanks to everyone who participated. I can't wait to hold another one soon. I hope to feature these winners in a future post, but I wanted to get the announcement out for anyone desperately waiting lol :)

I hope everyone has a Happy Thanksgiving. If its a hard holiday for you like it is for me, remember to prepare ahead of time with a gameplan.

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4 Great Reasons to Track Your Meditation Efforts in a Log or Journal

2009-11-23T11:35:00.000-07:00

I like the idea of being held accountable for whether or not I do my weekly yoga since that was a goal I made for myself during this monthly challenge. A lot of you have said that taking walks in the mornings have really helped you.

The fact is, if I don't have to report to anyone, or keep track of my progress, than the likelihood of me sticking with it will plummet. I tend to like lists. So I thought about how we reward our kids with charts and when they do a chore they get to put a sticker on it and thought, why not?

So I did a little research into logging meditation efforts. I found alot of exercise logs that help you track your weight lifting routine, workouts, or diet but an all out exercise regiment is not what I am focusing on right now. We'll save that for another month.

I specifically want to focus on when I do my yoga to make sure I am doing it once a week. I found a log that you can print out here that will allow you to track how often you do flexibility training as well as track any other kind of exercise you may be working on.

I also came across the idea of keeping a meditation journal. I realize that I am not an expert or doctor and so a lot of what I share on this blog is articles or information that I have found from real experts or doctors.

"Mindfulness is about knowing where we are (being in the moment) and also about maintaining an awareness of where we have been (reflection) and where we are going (having goals). A meditation journal can help us with all of those areas of awareness, helping us to have a more unified awareness of ourselves." -wildmind

Here are 5 great reasons to track your meditation efforts in a log or journal:

Reason #1: It Helps You ”Keep It Real"

Keeping a meditation journal helps us have a more definite sense of what is actually going on. The act of recording when you do your meditation techniques ensures that you are conscientious of what you are actually doing versus what you think you are doing. You'll know exactly how often you take this time out for yourself. You will be able to know if you are not doing it enough, or if you need to try a different kind of meditation technique.

Reason # 2: Journals Give You The Big Picture

Logs and journals don’t have to be just for recording when you take the time out to meditate. A good log can also contain notes about miscellaneous items like the amount of sleep you got the night before, your energy levels before and after, what your mood was like, the amount of time it lasted, etc. You can track when your anxiety is really high and how your meditation is effecting it. Do you always have less anxiety after meditating? Is it better when you meditate in the morning or right before bed? Being aware of the effect your meditation has on your anxiety can help you make lifestyle adjustments that can improve your progress and help you lead a healthier, more satisfied, life.

"When we sit down after meditation and take a few minutes to journal what we’ve been experiencing, it makes it pretty obvious how effective we’ve really been. If we examine our experience, honestly and with a desire to learn, then we become much more aware of what our meditation practice actually is. We can become more aware of our weaknesses and our strengths, and have a much more penetrating understanding of what we need to be working on." -wildmind

Reason #3: Logs Keep You Motivated

One of the great things about journals or logs is that when you’re feeling a little less motivated than usual, you can page back through your past efforts and learn about yourself and see the progress you’ve made over time.

Perhaps when you first started you struggled with different breathing techniques or yoga poses, or struggled just to find the time. If you are tracking your mental thoughts before and/or after, maybe at the beginning you were really having a hard time everyday with feelings of doubt, low self esteem, or just anxious thoughts, and now its only every once in awhile that you have a bad day. Perhaps now you have a regular schedule, even daily. Sometimes this is all it takes to get you fired up about trying again.

Reason # 4: Helps Us to Set Goals

"Our journaling can help us to set goals. It’s not that we try to pin down our experience before it happens – that’s rarely if ever going to work and it’s more likely to result in frustration than in any progress in our meditation practice. Instead what we’re trying to do in setting goals is to develop a stronger sense of where we want to go in our meditation practice. Through looking back at our past experience we can see what we need to work on. Perhaps it’s forgiveness or patience that we need to develop. Perhaps it’s more persistence. Or more calmness.

Perhaps we’ll discover that we are lazier than we thought, or perhaps that we try too hard, or perhaps even that we fluctuate in our efforts. We may discover that there are particular distractions that are much more common that we had recalled.

Whatever changes we want to make, having clear goals will help us attain them." -wildmind

If you want to do a meditation journal a simple spiral notebook will do. You can have a journal online if that's your thing, or even take the time to decorate a journal to make it more personal and special.

Don't forget to enter the giveaway! It ends TODAY!!!!

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