the secret life of viv

month of love

2012-02-01T20:01:00.000-08:00

and we are once again upon the hallmark holiday of LOVE. and although I will indulge in this month of celebrating LOVE, I beg to ask, WHY? why is it that most or at least a vast majority of you, wait until this month to go into a frantic panic? you stress yourselves out trying to find the perfect way to show your special someone just how much you LOVE them. I am going to take this post to dissect valentine's day and how it has evolved into this insane day of stuffed crappy bears, cheap tasteless chocolate, carbon copied diamond jewelry and the only thing I find worthy....red roses.

saint valentine was a real pimp in his day. against the wishes of the king of rome [claudius], a big gangsta, pimp was marrying the christian kids of the villages of rome. baller claud found out about pimp, pimp tried swaying baller and king baller claud ordered val to death. I'd compare val to friar john from romeo & juliet. against the king's order, he was joining these couples in marriage. it sounds sweet and endearing. and truthfully, I believe it is. I find LOVE to be an outstanding & magnificent, even magical, 'verb'. the idea that these couples would be married while imprisoned makes what val did extraordinary.

well, he pissed off the king, so they ordered him to be beaten and stoned. when the beating and stoning didn't kill him, they had him beheaded. gruesome end to what could have been a beautiful love story, huh?! now, granted this took place around 496, I get that part, but I can't wrap my mind around the above listed lame gifts. LOVE shouldn't be celebrated once a year on a day that saint val was MURDERED. that's right people, he was KILLED on 2.14. it wasn't some spectacular day of love. he was beheaded. and there you are gushing over in some multi-manufactured hallmark card about your UNDYING LOVE. you gave him or her a dust bunny collecting stuffed bear? do I need to present the history of "Teddy Bears" to you too? and the chocolate. I, for one, LOVE chocolate. rich, creamy 70% dark chocolate. not that dry brittle crumble in my mouth, bring me a glass of milk before I choke chocolate. and if you're gonna buy your girl jewelry, I realize ben bridge and kay have cornered the market in mass produced charms, bracelets, rings, diamond pendants etc., but did it ever occur to you that you could try a classy joint like tiffany's? yes! tiffany's! for the money you'd spend on buying her what is intended to be 'unique' [but you know it isn't], you could buy a quality piece she'll never forget.

but my point, here, isn't to point you in the direction of hand written love letters over cards. truth is, you should be sending love notes to one another all day everyday anyway. with today's technology there is zero excuses. what's that? you say you don't own a cell phone? guess what?! staples sells paper in an array of colors and they might even sell you a pen to write with. and the truth is, when you hand over a box of chocolate, she is praying to goddess she'll find that hidden piece of jewelry in one of those gross pieces of candy that by weeks end will be a mutilated box of mush; half eaten cherry oozing gunk, and disappointment. and truth is, unless she's 12, when you think about picking up the rainbow colored stuffed buddy bear, snap out of it! again, a dust bunny collecting, allergy ridden, garage sale item. keep walking!

I'm not here to shatter anyone's views of what valentine's day might mean to them. for some, this was the day they were proposed to, married on or for many, were dumped. what I'm hoping to convey with my bitter tasting, hard to swallow truth, is this. LOVE should be celebrated every day! from the point that you open your eyes, be in-love. rekindle that love affair you started with your better half. preparing special meals, sending love letters, plan date nights, do something that says "I LOVE YOU".

if you feel you must acknowledge february 14th, at the least be creative. flowers don't always have to be roses and they don't necessarily need to come from conroy's [another chain establishment offering zero originality]. and if you're planning a dinner, research some of the quieter, more intimate spots where you feel like its just the two of you in your own LOVE bubble. celebrate YOUR love uniquely. don't rely on the media to guide you because they only aim to deceive and manipulate you. and write a LOVE letter. seriously! when was the last time you wrote one? maybe when you first began courting you may have sent a cheesy poem or love note? well, whatever it was that you did, it got you status in his or her life. maintain and sustain every single day!! I can't say it enough. and if you're one who celebrates, again, be unique, be all about the LOVE.

“love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” | robert heinlein

cynthia h designs

2012-01-26T21:00:00.000-08:00

this girls story is different but relative to yours and my life experiences. we all go down our own required paths as a means to get to the things we desire. and often, it takes break-downs, challenges and, sometimes loss, to really appreciate the arrival of all that you want.

I met cynthia through my cousin, d*fox, as they used to dance on soul train. her comments and posts to his facebook are what caught my eye. she has always shared nothing short of uplifting and positive feedback and this intrigued me. her profile photo even oozed of her inner light revealing something truly amazing to be found beyond this facade. well, I finally met this force of nature one evening for coffee. and from the moment she walked in the door, I knew...kismet! I can not WAIT for this girls future to unfold into what she was TRULY meant for.

these are the creation of cynthia h designs message bracelets. I added the word "INTENTION" to describe these bracelets & the reason is simple. its typical for us to get trapped in some of life's mediocre moments of negativity. however, with some easy reprogramming by always having 10 'positive intentions' to redirect those nasty negative thoughts you can turn a day around. cynthia h created these message bracelets to help keep your thoughts shifted into positive gear. I recommend HAVING as many of these non-frilly, simply put, beautifully created "INTENTION" Message Bracelets with 22 different 'statements' to choose from in a variety of colors.

oh, and she invited me to join her as her guest to the 'expanding your horizons expo' for woman at the richard nixon library in yorba linda. I feel quite honored to have shared such an outstanding experience with such a great group of powerful women doing for themselves.

“you need to be aware of what others are doing, applaud their efforts, acknowledge their successes, and encourage them in their pursuits. When we all help one another, everybody wins.” | jim stovall

all caught up

2012-01-24T18:30:00.000-08:00

I don't usually go this long without a post however I have been very distracted for the past 27 days. last we left off, it was taco tuesday, which has been a continued tradition. same insane conversations and crispy tacos, I just wasn't posting this info here as promised. now, please, bare with me & refrain from holding it against me that I also kept you from the incredibly great night we had at art walk, sushi with sachiko or the views overlooking newport harbor. I am here this evening to bring you all up to speed. I can't promise you that I won't continue to be distracted, I think its safe to say that from here on out.....that part will be inevitable. however, I will do my best to stay on top of posting/sharing.

now, when I say catch you up, what you'll see is that I'll be creating the posts and dating them for the days that they should have been posted since 1.3.2012

lets go back to 1.5.2012 and proceed from there:

little drummer boys

mom celebrates another year

s a a w january

walking/talking w/ sachiko

the inspiration room

black doris

cynthia h designs

GDO | girls day out

2012-01-21T15:45:00.000-08:00

just another 'GDO' spending time at fashion island down by the beach, close to the ocean. and recently discovering that the smell of ocean air & garlic are like aphrodisiacs to the senses and FI has a plethora of this. on this day, while taking the time, like every moment I take, to smell the 'roses' [so to speak], I enjoyed, yet, ANOTHER amazing afternoon spent with several of my favorite ladies.

grandma would be proud that I've taught so many to revel in the simplest of moments.

Life IS good!

I snapped a few pics of some cute boys.

we walked. we bonded

I had a mimosa.

we broke bread.

we ate.

we shopped.

I look forward to more of this throughout the coming months [years even]

“nothing is more exciting and bonding in relationships than creating together” | stephen r. covey

black doris

2012-01-20T20:55:00.000-08:00

we woke up to an early blooming spring like snow flakes stuck to the branches

“Never cut a tree down in the wintertime. Never make a negative decision in the low time. Never make your most important decisions when you are in your worst moods. Wait. Be patient. The storm will pass. The spring will come.” | Robert H. Schuller

the inspiration room

2012-01-13T20:51:00.000-08:00

I think you've all hear plenty about the infamous "inspiration room" where the m a g i c is made with the help of a MUSIC and fabulous FRIENDS! since its newly revamped overhaul & upgrade, much has been done. this is just a taste of this magic room. and really, it isn't the room that is magic, but the circle of people who enter it!

“enthusiasm is excitement with inspiration, motivation, and a pinch of creativity.” | bo bennett

walking/talking w/ sachiko

2012-01-08T20:32:00.000-08:00

just another amazing day in california walking down by the shore. . .

I used to walk this beach daily when I was about 20/21 with my, then love, JMH. it seems so surreal to, now, have a friend who lives directly across the street from the old place. but, its a brand new day some 20 years later and time for new memories.

sachiko and I spent the afternoon catching up like long lost sisters filling in the years we'd lost. she gave me facial, a cocktail, lunch, laughter & then we walked.

this is lulu

this be the run away frisbee. it came from a far away beach and continued traveling even further

and as we walked, we spotted a seashell solar system

the man in the sand

the mary kay house [j/k]

and some other beautiful homes I liked

I found this one particularly curious

and I'm particularly fond of entrances. these were a few I admired on our walk

and this beautiful italian wall fountain

we walked and talked and then I stayed to catch this beautiful sunset

and a final toast to new friendships and new memories

“life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends we choose.” | tennessee williams

s a a w january

2012-01-07T19:57:00.000-08:00

it was a typical night out at art walk with a few new faces. we started out with appetizers at memphis and more birthday celebrations for mi mum and d*fox!

DiGUM

“art is the most intense mode of individualism that the world has known.” |

oscar wilde

next art walk :: 2.4.2012

mom celebrates another year

2012-01-06T18:14:00.000-08:00

mom celebrated her "third" rebirthday and 66th year of life on the day of the epiphany. and like rockstars, we celebrated big. we all climbed into the hoop-d and headed south for the border. el cholo in irvine that is. one of the best happy hours in the OC. but we were there to be wined and dined to ring in this brand new year in honor of mi mum.

happy birthday mumsi!

“love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” robert heinlein

little drummer boys

2012-01-05T17:46:00.000-08:00

the boys hit the garage like gangbusters cleaning & organizing the haphazardous clutter in the so-called 'garage'. mom's crap over here, my crap over there. here crap, there crap, everywhere more crap crap. . .
and once a dent was made; a huge one, they brought in the drum set. there was a time that my son, noodle, the oldest of three, would video tape via the mac, almost daily. and on one very interesting afternoon in his most rico suave' voice filled with intention and belief, he sent out a shout and request to all of the people of the youtube world to come together and help him form his band, HzRd. it was ambitious at best considering he'd only ever had a handful of drum lessons and may have only played his peewee like an air guitar. but I gave him props for having such hope. now, some 5 years later, the drums doth appear by way of cole. you bada$$ cole!

that first weekend they were here, it was ethan and boo outside collaborating. but once the big boys left, boo took over and went from being a self-taught guitar player to, now, playing the drums. and, yes, folks....self-taught again. pretty impressive. noodles may just stick to editing cause he's so damn good at it!

at any rate, check out the drums

“music expresses that which cannot be put into words and cannot remain silent” | victor hugo

taco tuesday

2012-01-03T19:00:00.000-08:00

I struggle with sitting down for dinner with my kids each day. traditionally it has been a household ritual for most that you would all sit around the table to catch up on the daily events and just 'be' a family. and we have been no different with the exception that my family is anything but traditional. these kids, especially, noodle, scares me each time we sit to dine at any table. this past thanksgiving, conversation somehow revolved around cremation. this wasn't started by noodle, but boo! why? we'll never know. but it blew up from there. so there we were enjoying our family time, or at the least attempting to, we went from cremation to diamonds to noodle suddenly getting incredibly enthusiastic; his eyes wild as he bounced in his seat and slaps the table with his open palms as he gasps. then just as excited as his body language was he says, "I know! I want to be turned into an ACTION FIGURE!" to which his father shoots his sparkling apple cider from his nose and then chokes as he begins to double over in laughter. across the table is nan who's eyes grow in shock, then she looks to me but I'm already down for the count WISHING I'd have had a video recorder running to capture this moment. noodle went on to say that we should prop his action figure up on the toilet but to be sure that the eyes look real and scary so that when visitor went to the bathroom they'd get the 'crap' scared outta them.

yes, THIS is what most dinners become on any given day of the week. but because I'm too young for adult diapers and these kids often make me laugh so hard I piss my pants, I try to stick to the one day of the week where we can get out & in public where conversations can still run away [and they do] we, they, might behave a little better. its doubtful but worth the try AND worth the time. these kids are the best.

for the past 5 months we have walked to our local taco joint for taco tuesday. but sometimes it isn't even about that taco or the tuesday, its family day. its the day we look forward to each week for a few reasons, we love mexican food [duh], we enjoy one another's company even when boo is in a funk, and we're funny. yes, people, WE are funny! so, I will start by creating a weekly post about "taco tuesday" although it may not actually have anything to do with tacos. maybe we'll mix it up and have a sushi saturday? or pho monday? either way, we'll do it and if its ever doable, we'll record the funny.

I hope that you all make the most out of your family time whether it be low key game night, movie night, taco tuesday or maybe miniature golf night, roller skating, cycling etc. just DO IT! make time, spend time and enjoy!

“the best inheritance a parent can give to his children is a few minutes of their time each day.” | m. grundler

LUV U C U | Viv

off and running

2012-01-02T17:20:00.000-08:00

just another day in the neighborhood. it was to begin with breakfast with my patty cakes at my favorite pho cafe, but it ended up being n.v. her first time. she was a lotus virgin [so to speak].

n.v. thinks I may need an intervention. its possible that I might need rehab, but I won't go willingly.

on my list of addictions, lets add ocean. I'm a lover of everything ocean/shore/beach. any opportunity given to dine, walk, shop, photograph or just BE there, my excitement level rises. today, we chose newport because of its close proximity of home. I've mentioned a million times in past posts that the beach has a played a major role in my youth and was a consistent pass time in my years growing up into my teen years and on. the only time in my life was I not close to the beach was when I lived in washington state. the beach was quite the drive and what the people in the area I lived in called beach, really wasn't and I only visited once. the actually beach we took the trek out to also only once and it was cold and didn't offer any of the seaside activities that I have grown used to.

newport is full of things to do, but n.v. and I chose photography and a stroll on the boardwalk. perfect choice on such a beautifully clear day.

ringing in the new year

2012-01-01T09:00:00.000-08:00

just a quick pictorial view on how the eve before sha-bang was spent

Luv U C U!

“an optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. a pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.” | bill vaughn

looking back at 2011

2011-12-31T00:00:00.000-08:00

what a crazy year! but then I suppose I could say the same for almost every year leading up to 2012. Back in 2009, I recall wishing for it to end just so we could get on with 2010. my anticipation for 2010 was of positive change and wishes for prosperity. I ended up leaving lbc to live in Irvine with the mum who really needed me. and after more than 2 years of resume’ submission in search of a j-o-b, I was finally blessed with one that couldn’t have been a better fit. the only down-side, which I suspected after being hired, was the demographics. Instinctively, I knew that, if for any reason, should the fundip and I ever end, I’d be subjected to working on the same corner as him. but, as I have been paying attention my whole life, all things happen for a reason, and in their time. I am to simply go with the flow. so far, so GREAT!

so, as I suspected, the fundip monday fundays ended with a big bang and he turned out to be not such a great guy. Is that slander? nah! I think it’s just good honest, in your face, DEAL WITH IT kind of information. the job is still fabulous! let’s begin in January because there’s no need to pretend the year never existed. It did. and because it did, I grew and changed. I updated a few lists of mine and have a whole new outlook on things. wants. needs.

lola celebrated ‘40’ this year. valentine’s day meant more to me than it did him. paco’s play house was officially opened and dubbed ‘the inspiration room’. and while this entire major shift was going on with lola’s new house, the inspiration room thumping, relationships ending, friends were experiencing a shift that would be the most life changing of all. {{LIVE}} I celebrated another year of life [yay]. and moved AGAIN! Yep, again. that, I believe, makes twenty-four. two trips to corvallis and planning on many more in my future! we had the vampire weekend, we started the daily FIVE for gratitude, turkey day was a hoot with conversations about cremation and taxidermy and my oldest sharing his idea of being turned into an action figure. nice! and we topped the season off with a hallmark holiday. tis the season of giving and I was so very pleased to see so many who chose to give of their time rather than silly gifts. bless you all!

to sum up the year, I can’t choose just one word or even one emotion. it was the worst roller coaster ride, I believe, I’ve ever been on. it was hopelessly tragic, hurtful, and emotionally exhausting but the upside was that I was surrounded by all the right people who connected me with new people. I went from sobbing my tears and snot on the bathroom floor to choosing my friends and family as my means of entertainment. I allowed the beginning to begin [so to speak].

for a period there, even while I sobbed, I was approached by people who reminded me that my light was bright. I should never allow the sadness or insecurities of others to extinguish all that brews within me. [this little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine]

oregon was a major turning point. I couldn’t have imagined that this trip would unleash so much from inside of me. the packing, the waiting at LAX – tears. the flight. the music – tears. the layover in vegas – tears. seeing her face just when I wanted to break down. my legs, spirit, mind – broken. but for her, my patty, I smiled. I smiled for as long as I could until we walked into her room and the perfume bottle from my past revealed a name which I couldn’t erase and then – tears.

back home, more tears. I looked terrible, I felt terrible. but the people who would reveal themselves – wow! such a surreal moment to have several people; some I’ve known my entire life, others I’ve known for a few years and then some I only met this year, brought me to the greatest of tears with the kindest of words. as arrogant as it might sound to those who have never heard such words or are ‘viv haters’ [cause we all have haters in our lives], it was the most uplifting to have these people tell me of the joy I have brought to their lives each morning with my posts, music and updates. to have people say to me “your light shines bright” – wow! humbling!

as the days passed, my heart grew bigger and stronger. the paths we travel, the challenges we break, they only build us up IF allowed. and there were people, sad, pathetic people whom I have nothing but love for, as they lied, cheated and tried manipulating. then there were the ones who still are having trouble wrapping their head around “viv”, who she is, what she’s doing and why. not many, only a few. but even the greatest of leaders couldn’t reach everyone. and so, I accept that they aren’t for me to lead. and by lead, I mean by example.

big love & shout outs to all of the following people who gave so much of their love and continued support throughout 2011:

mum, dad, mom, yosh, sis nikki, the kids, the ex-jsunday, stella, kir, lola, paco, ava, the guru, anton, blue caterpillar, mr. barry, jennifer bell, d*fox, fred, lisa & cult jam, jenn goat, the benevenia’s, lamb chop & patty cakes, cynthia h designs, micha von doring, jeni & zoey, russy & izzy, all of my readers, my facebook fanpage followers, my loyal twitter followers…..and to anyone I may have forgotten! From the depths of my heart, I wish you all peace & love in the coming year.

the journey

2011-12-30T10:50:00.000-08:00

can we skip the next 2 days and just get on with it? I am so excited to get 2012 started. a renewed and better year with so many adventures just waiting at the gate for the gun to go off. there are so many exciting plans that have been stirring that I've kept under wraps for awhile. as I see it, MAJOR CHANGE!

everyday offers a new begging, a fresh start, a way of letting go of yesterday's dirt even if it wasn't so dirty. in fact, my yesterday's for the past few months have been marvi! I'm near certain there were struggles, in fact, I know there were. I can look back even to yesterday and see a few hurtles, but that isn't what I revel in. I revel in the fact that because I have learned to take each day in stride, each step becomes easier as I make that climb to my destination. but then we all know it isn't the destination that brings such joy and growth, but the journey!

on december 26th I took a trek to my favorite coffee spot in long beach, viento y agua and ordered my usual killa tomato on a sun dried tomato bagel with tofuti and my cafe con leche with soy. the music was, as always, perfect! lola and I sat in our favorite corner by the window and were pleasantly surprised to see my favorite patron, bob sinclair. he sings the 'cafe con leche' song and I am PUSHING like crazy to get him to record this little ditty so we can share it here. [bob, you are an amazing person and I am one lucky lady to have been blessed by your presence]

cafe con love!

I THINK I have bob convinced [fingers crossed]

lola & I took a walk through the neighborhood towards a friend's new home. 'congratulations to sara and eric' on their new home!!! while enjoying the perfect day ofter weather, my lil roxy requests a visit to the beach. how do I deny the pleasure on such a gorgeous day? so, after a quick gift exchange with my ava [thank you for the clever gift. I now have the perfect picnic basket for the beach], I headed home to grab up the child, change the shoes and take the camera out.

after a random and quick convo with digum, we decided we'd visit the tide pools at corona del mar off poppy [my favorite street]. I'll allow the photos to speak for t hemselves, but begin with this:

as a child, and even in my twenties, I had the desire to live in this hood off poppy. best street is narcisuss; corner house, white! ocean view, the sound of waves putting me to sleep each night. the grassy area across the street would be my playground. we'd call it 'inspiration knoll'.

"we are tied to the ocean. And when we go back to the sea, whether it is to sail or to watch - we are going back from whence we came." | JFK

“let your mind start a journey thru a strange new world. leave all thoughts of the world you knew before. let your soul take you where you long to be...close your eyes let your spirit start to soar, and you'll live as you've never lived before.” | erich fromm

day 364

2011-12-30T07:40:00.000-08:00

Day 364 - Holy canoli! What a year its been! No seriously! So many universal shifts! The downs were just there to keep us grounded [so to speak] so that when the next climb came about & we reached the top....WOW! You could appreciate it THAT much more! And all I have is grand appreciation and love and GRATITUDE for every loop, twist, turn, dip, climb and rise to the TOP!
I am ever so grateful to ...the heavens for the alignment with Miss Kir! From the moment we met it was kismet. Seriously! Instantaneous. There was this spark that lit up the space between us even as I was at the bottom of a hill about to make my climb, I was very aware of some super duper love.
I am uber grateful to my pallete for loving the taste of some yum-mee Pho! I have had some pretty spectacular bowls of Pho, but the experience at Cafe Lotus in Newport Beach takes on a whole new meaning which leads me o being grateful to Thuy! She, from the very moment you meet her, is L O V E! Its like that awesome aunt who always had some good eats in the kitchen waiting to warm your tummy. And the staff - my family too! Just a wonderful place to dine so DOIT!
And I am grateful for my pretty little gift - the bag - which myself and Kir left with last night. Such a sweet gesture.
And to you, Gary! We don't know where you came from but wow! Looking forward to more chats soon. See you at SAAW!

cafe lotus

2011-12-28T22:38:00.000-08:00

when I moved for the umpteenth time, it was immediately important that we familiarize ourselves with all of our local restaurants and community boutiques. roman's for taco tuesday, lu lu and the hidden jewel for cute fashionable styles, the nursery behind lu lu's, and for some super good pho bo, cafe lotus.

its off old newport road across from hoag hospital. and rather than give up the goods on how spectacular this place really is, we'll just say that this is a [spoiler alert]. thuy, the owner, IS without a doubt, the BEST restaurant owner I have ever met. and if you follow my yelp you know I get out often. pre-yelp days, I was even eating then. I promise you, the moment you are greeted by thuy, you'll feel at home. cafe lotus is HOME.

I met my "my little pony", kir, for dinner this week. where else? cafe lotus with thuy! lovely kir brought me three beautiful, fresh cut roses. reason? she said because she was late. love that! and then she took the paper wrapper from her straw and MADE a paper rose for thuy. of course, she ended up giving it to this very handsome gentleman, gary, who sat beside us. I wonder if he still has his rose? I certainly shall hang onto mine for as long as is possible. very creative, kir! you are a force!

now, aside from the incredible food prepared at cafe lotus and the best service from people who make you feel like family, the energy that fills this space is of the best kind! we laughed, shared and caught up. we chatted it up with thuy about her gluten free buckwheat noodles, slurped our pho bo minus the bo. I enjoyed my hot cafe sua do and pork spring rolls. [close your eyes just there if you're a vegetarian]. but KNOW that if you are a vegetarian and you love vietnamese fare, this is the place to go. I promise you will not be disappointed.

I promise to spoil you after the first of the year with a full write up to show you WHY you need to visit cafe lotus! I should add that I went two days in a row!! yep, its THAT good. swear! [going again on monday!]

love U C U!

corvallis family pt III

2011-12-09T07:55:00.001-08:00

day one was obviously one for the records. I'm still laughing at jack who've dubbed jackie bobby. in fact, that's how he's listed in my cell. but for a few hours, there, I couldn't stop calling him "frank" as in stallone!

so, the next morning, friday, we were up and at em'. and by we, I mean myself and patty. we rolled out of bed around 530/6 am. and were planning the morning, breakfast, outfits. we had to look cute while eating the would be untoasted bread we'd get from the nameless diner unworthy of mention. but I'm getting ahead of myself.

patty and I are in her closet going through her sweats and handling hair and face. and from the other side of the door we can hear jackie bobby milling around and mumbling. patty cracks me up. she is SCARED on this side of the door; sweet voice, she says, "jack?!" and there was more banter THROUGH the door because she was NOT unlocking the door until she thought it was safe. jack, who is such a sweet heart, was more concerned about his ear. makes me sad when I think of the intended innocence when pranking him. but when he told us, we STILL didn’t really believe him.

we wore sweats [cyute juicy sweats], scarves, and big poofy winter coats as we made our way out to catch a bite to eat. not like seafood, but just breakfast at a local dive close to jimmy’s shop. every hillbilly in town was there to enjoy breakfast so I thought nothing of the fact that this place might just suck. inside were old, worn, brown vinyl booths with linoleum floors dating back to the 70’s. the wall art was reminiscent of an old horror movie like “the hills have eyes”. It was that outdated. the waitress, bless her heart, was terrible. she took our order and returned several times to fill our cups with java but it took forever to receive the simple meals we’d ordered. the pancakes were like flimsy, rubber frisbees. the coffee was half decent. but the worst part was having ordered eggs over-medium, receiveing eggs slightly runny and longing for lightly toasted sough dough bread to dip in the yoke that never came. it seems their toaster either burned or didn’t toast it at all. now, most would be peeved by this and react quite differently than we did. we, instead, chose to enjoy the company that we were sharing. we laughed about every little current condition that we experienced. it was like the twilight zone.

after ‘break fast’, we darted out, jimmy returned to work and the three of us, patty, jackie bobby and myself, decided to hit the mall. all he cared about in this moment was getting some oregon souvenirs for his kids [and cigarettes]. when I go to our local mall, I drive 3 miles [approx 5-10 min]. I think we drove for 30-40 minutes through some beautiful scenery to get to the mall. the liquid amber trees most definitely keep the eyes occupied.
the mall was quiet and the people were friendly! while patty ran in to say hi to a friend, jackie bobby and I grabbed some coffee from 'big town hero'. the gentleman behind the counter, pat, was too kind. the conversation began with coffee, went to my working for disneyland, to this coffee needs some punch. pat kindly took my advice and re-brewed his coffee using a different measurement and brewed the perfect pot of java. jack saw me work my magic and we made a new friend. if you're ever at heritage mall, tell pat that viv says hi [and thank you!].
at the mall we wandered through a couple of stores and at a popular accessory shop, jackie bobby bought me some super cute bedazzled fingerless gloves [which I keep in my purse] THANKS JACK! our visit to the mall was short lived but worth the trek. we headed home to get ready for the evening's festivities.
family knew I'd be visiting but no one knew jack was here from jersey [joyzee]. the sauce and meatballs prepared the night before were put on the stove top to bubble. pasta was getting prepped and myself and patty had to gather up derek, jimmy's son. I didn't have my camera [again] for this trip because I guess my thought was we're just going to his friend's house. what could be so "wow" about that? we headed down this single lane dirt road lined with bare trees and homes spread pretty far apart. at the end was this grand craftsman style home approximately 7000+ square feet with an infinity pool in the back yard. but it was the majestic forest of tall birch that surrounded this home that was so captivating. and when patty disappeared inside, from the forest, emerged four teenage boys wilding air soft rifles. had I had my finger on my trigger, I'd have shot them! ugh!
we scurried home, got ready, hid jack, who, while hiding, put his chef's coat on and towel over his arm. the first of the family arrived, marie and shawna. marie was soooooo surprised and happy to see her cousin! the "jack!!!!" and "oh my gawd" was great! but the best was the next. while jack hide for the second time, I leaned hard against the front door as josey, whom I haven't seen in 23 or so years tries to push the door open. I stepped away to allow the door to open expecting this surprised face. I go in to hug her and she just looked at me like I was crazy. turns out, patty and I look a LOT alike and josey, PATTY'S blood sister....thought I was patty. ha! but, I got my hug.
we all [but jack] convened in the kitchen/dining room area and then called on the 'butler'. as he emerged from the hallway, he made his way to the kitchen. I suggested that josey ask him for a meatball. freaked out, she refused. jimmy demanded the butler mix her a drink and josey, very concerned about our treatment of this guy, scoots in saying she'd do it herself. with her back to him, he turns to her, walks to stand beside her at which point she FINALLY looks him in the face and then the real freak out began. josey cried, hugged and hugged and laughed. it was so awesome for me to be a part of this little reunion. I truly love this family and now I have jack too. blessed!
once the settling began jack grabbed his prepared dish of spaghetti and meatballs with a tossed salad and the table was set. we ate, we drank and were all most def merry! it was a repeat performance of 'bobby' and jack's strut up the hallway. and after two days of constant stim, viv pooped out quickly.
someone, take that girl h o m e!
thank you to this wonderful, loving family for ALWAYS making me feel like I was a part of it. you mean the world to me!

rooster

2011-12-03T14:33:00.001-08:00

corvallis II-jackie bobby

2011-12-03T14:29:00.000-08:00

corvallis family pt. II

2011-11-30T17:25:00.001-08:00

to try and bring you up to speed, sort of, from my first trip to oregon [parts I and II] check the links below:
corvallis I
corvallis II
I had to make another trek up north for a second visit. my first was disrupted emotionally and I spent a great deal of time fighting whirling thoughts that I couldn't make go away, I cried more than I should have and a do-over was highly needed. now, bare with me, because this trip was straight CRAZEE! from the point that my cab arrived [5:30am] thursday morning to deliver me to john wayne airport until my chariot arrived to pick me up when I returned home. I don't want to leave a single detail out so please, do your best to keep up.

ok, cab arrives at the wee hours and the check-in was quite empty. this pleased me knowing I could get my things handled quickly and hit the terminal. I was to wait at terminal 6 and would sit at row 20 seat A.

the line boarding my flight was short and quick. getting to my seat was just the same. and when I got to my seat, the entire row all the way across was empty. I waited, thinking more people would be arriving, but, for the first time ever, I had an entire row all to myself. I put the armrest up and let the chillaxin begin.

oh, and then the flight had in-flight wifi FREE! I know that someone like myself who has no need to connect for work purposes shouldn't care, but I do and I did. like a fat kid in a candy store, I was so giddy. I was snapping shots in cabin and posting. and like a silly window-licker [minus the helmet] I was cracking up laughing to myself at the crazy updates I was posting. I had my itouch plugged in and had the beats bumping in my head. there was a party all right, but I was the only guest.

landing....awww the landing. I always get excited because you NEVER know what may be waiting for you in the terminal; especially with patty. I was safe this trip. phew! we did a quick catch up [no recap here] and then found our way back inside to eat. remember when you were actually offered a meal in-flight and it was INCLUDED?

no worries cause THIS was the ISH!!!!

bananas fosters for patty and crab benedict for moi

now, here's where things just get ignited. its like a fire was lit and our arses were on fire because as soon as patty's cousin jack arrived......O M G! okay, it started off okay. he was very sweet, charming, good sense of humor. but by the time we'd settled in only AFTER he tried claiming the master bedroom....uh NO! MINE MINE MINE hahaha it was later explained WHY jack chose this room. saving THAT for later.

maybe here is where I should decided that THIS post will be two of....four. the evening just went wild from here. the energy was so elevated between myself and patty's constant banter, pranks, joking and laughter to jimmy's egging us on and jack fueling the fire. he WAS the fire.

we'll begin with chef boyardee. jack hit the kitchen flying. he brought with him [along with much harassment from the airlines] a huge duffle bag filled with fresh italian cheeses, sausage [chorizo], several loaves of bread and olives. it was like that scene from pulp fiction where john travolta's character opens the case and the beautiful golden glow illuminates his face and stares into the light mesmerized. that was us as jack unzipped his duffle and began pulling out the goodies. as he prepared this presentation of nibbles, patty got the wine out and we got the evening started.

now, it gets a little cloudy here because there was so much going on in my head so bear with me. but if my memory serves me correct, we made a quick trip to the market to pick up some last minute items for dinner. meatballs for the following evening when family would be over and stuffed bell peppers for us on this night. again, like three children, we shuffled through the market messing with customers heads. at one point I'm next to jack checking out the goods as crazy patty comes up from behind me. she stops and with total attitude says, "uh, excuse me....could you move your a$$ please?" now, behind me is an elderly woman who looked like she feared for her life as her jaw slightly dropped open and her eyes bugged out. I turn with just as much tude and followed up with some snide remark just as tactless. later, patty and I were making our way up the back side of the store walking so close I could have been giving her a piggy back as we pass the same woman now completely confused as we smiled at her and said "Hi!". I know. it was mean....but funny and no one got hurt.

back at the castle, jack bust out the meat and his magic blend of spices and garlic and and and.....it was crazy awesome. jimmy dropped the italian beats to set the mood. it should have calmed any normal functioning human down but we were all juiced up on adrenaline.

once we'd stuffed our faces it was time to bust out the hookah. jimmy has a super nice hookah and with it he had mango flavored tobacco. I was a virgin hookah hitter so I was ready and excited to embark.

what's funny is the video that was taken which can't be shared [sorry]. when I boarded the plane, I immediately became congested and sniffly. and I thought I'd handled my biz, however as I blew the mango smoke from my nose, it only exited a single nostril. omg the hoots and giggles. we were dying! jack was fumbling with the camera trying his hardest to get a shot of this phenomenon. jimmy is across the table safely heckling me while patty records this. just create your own hysterical image of viv and her singular blow. insane!

uuugggghhhhhh....and so the jack. [I bet you thought I was done!]

this cat is too silly. when he came threw the terminal, I'm meeting him for the first time calling out Frank!!!! Frank!!!!! cause he looks JUST like stallone! people's head's spinning. jack's story is this, he was an aspiring comedian and after marrying, he gave up his dream. no need o get into any other details than that. this guy gave us two bits WHICH I recorded and WILL share.

and BACK at the other house, no details required, just know that I have a home in corvallis. ok, THEY have a home, but I am blessed to stay there and IN the room with the lock on the door.

sorry jack! we do love you

and this is why I get the master bedroom with the lock

[to be continued pt III]

corvallis family pt. I

2011-11-27T08:35:00.001-08:00

in 1989, mom and I moved from my g'pa, adrien's farm in chino, to an apartment in the city of anaheim. I was a wild child. aged 19 with a 'boyfriend' I despised because he wouldn't go away no matter how many times I told him to. I had a guy I truly enjoyed in my life but I was too stupid to know what I had at the time. and then this is where I met jamie who showed me what love should feel like when its real and mutual. as passionate as this all sounds, it was an upheaval of emotional flurry I wouldn't deal with until many years later.

when we first moved to this hood, I was working in orange and attending fullerton junior college. I was busy with being 19 and enjoying life in my youthful prime. in our little anaheim village were a gaggle of teenagers who would often mill around in our courtyard. every unit in our courtyard of 8 was occupied by kids and the other courtyards that neighbored ours seemed to have similar occupation. and for some reason I was feeling quite 'mature'. [I'll be damned if I'd call myself old at age 19] these kids just slayed me.

I mean, it was the beginning of the 90's so hair was huge, gloss was thick but the attitudes was too fierce for these kids to have. well, one of them had this hair that was to die for! it was past her waist and was just as curly. she was gorgeous! and, too, she was loud. she was saucy. and she was out of her mind! and I would grow to love this little girl like a sister. This little tumultuous village would be the beginning of a very long sisterhood that neither of us ever saw coming.

so many memories, but my first was walking her to the mcdonald's up the street, which today I wouldn't do for two reasons. the first is I don't eat that caca and the second is I no longer think its safe to walk the distance we walked that night at that hour wearing what I'm sure was a skirt or shorts that showed waaaaay too much arse. but as patty tells it, I saved her. as we walked up the sidewalk she nearly walked into one of those cables running from the pole into the sidewalk. she says I saved her as if it would have split her in half, but really she'd have knocked herself out. I laugh now cause the visual is hysterical.

I eventually moved in with my patty along with her younger sister and mother. like a good nanny/sister, I got these girls up for school, showered, dressed and out the door. I did this for a year making sure they were fed and that homework was done. mama marie worked the night shift so she slept during the day and all of this happened while a little bun in the oven was growing, shawna!

living in this italian household would prove to be a wild trip! we ate well, laughed constantly and patty, dammit! you are such a naughty girl. the pranks were constant! still are! here we are some 23 years later and you are even nuttier now that you're seasoned.

patty and I lost some years there after having babies and moving out of state. but, thanks to the internet, she found me! I honestly never thought that I'd impacted her life or family as they had mine until we reconnected back in 2004; some twelve years since our last encounter.

after catching up on all those years lost and chatting as often as possible on the phone staying up to date on current events, she planned a trek from her, now home in oregon, to california. in february of 2008 she spent a few days out in apple valley, a good 2 hour drive from where we lived in south oc. but to see patty, I'd have driven further. and although she is notorious for getting car sick, she did well on this long trek back. almost a week of shopping, sushi, more sushi, laughing, pranks on the next best victim. I hated to let her go back home.

since that visit, our lives changed drastically. most of you who've followed since 2007 would be aware of my life changes, so in a nutshell, here's hers. she became a very young mom at the age of 16, now the mother of 4. she has been hard-working supporting all of her children by working two jobs, staying on her feet for hours even while pregnant. and for her, I will say, that is one bad arse mama! she deserves to be treated like a queen for all of the love she has given. sometimes, we love for the sake of loving and giving because it feels good, but in return we don't always get what we need, want or deserve. and I believe we all deserve to have it all!

this brings me to may 18th of 2010 when my little sister's life changed and she began her new life. she has become the queen she always was and she is so deserving of everything, all of the love she receives. and on august 22nd of this year, I was invited to come visit her in oregon to witness the awesomeness that is, patty and jimmy.

daily FIVE for gratitude 326

2011-11-22T14:50:00.001-08:00

DAY 326!!!!
I am grateful for GLUE for enabling me to adhere my inspirational words & pics to canvas.
My pets! every single one of them. They ALL brought to us love, nose licks, cuddles, hisses and giggles.
Trees and their leaves in summer to offer shade and fall to offer beautiful inspiration that blows in the wind.
Mom for making us often laugh so hard our faces hurt leading to tears.
Dad for coming the distance to pick his daughter up from work - the rides home are quite comical too if even not intended to be ♥

reflections

2011-11-17T11:20:00.001-08:00

taking a moment to reflect on this life. It’s been a year since I posted a piece called “independence” in which I pissed off my, then, beau. reality does bite sometimes. I am a busy girl by nature. I have always been a traveler loving to be spontaneous; jumping in my ride and randomly heading to parts of LA or down to the beach for a day of fun. of course, having company is ideal, but they must be a willing party who enjoys the adventure as much as I do. a friend reminded me some years ago how I was his escape from ‘home’. he’d only ever traveled outside of his city circle to one [maybe two] other cities until I came around. crazy me had him in chino, ontario, los angeles, anaheim….anywhere and everywhere my car would take us. never a complaint! my only regret, now, is that we never documented those days.

and today, a year later….really YEARS later, I’m still independent. Imagine that?! I didn’t change and have no immediate plans on changing. the only way I’d ever be willing to ‘lean’ on a partner is if I knew without a doubt that he was committed and conveyed his desire to take care of me. but even then, that would only be a financial lean. a few months ago I was home adventure-less and in my room. I hated the position of my bed and so I decided it had to be moved. keep in mind I have no man in my life and my bed is queen Japanese platform bed with a leather headboard AND the mattress frame lifts for storage. this bad boy is a heavy beast! I removed the mattress and bedding but that was all I could do to lessen the weight of this bed. I dug deep within myself and within less than an hour I had this bed moved from one wall in my room to a different wall. mattress replaced and bed made. In between pushes and pulls I would stop and laugh at myself realizing I may have bit off more than I could chew but I was going to complete this crazy task. period! I even posted to my facebook wall that I needed to find my inner sheerah or that I needed extra arms. but, in the end, I got it done minus any assistance. well, unless you count ‘sam’ who would periodically text me making me laugh. and after flexing my inner bad ass, I treated myself to lunch at roman’s.

now, this same friend whom I kidnapped [figuratively] on my adventures once told me that it was okay to be single. of course, at the time, I wasn’t single. I was involved and thought we’d spend our days growing old together but that fantasy quickly died when he shed his cloak of lies. my friend sat like a spiritual guru telling me that being in a relationship that wasn’t offering all that you want or deserved meant settling and that settling should never be an option. his words reverberated often in my head when my, then, partner did things that were beyond questionable. I say beyond questionable because he once told me that he was giving ME the benefit of the doubt by sticking it out. ME? are you kidding?! let me chime in and say, “you shady chump!” [and that is all]

and I was listening to a song by our favorite teenage pop star, JB, called “u smile”:
I'd wait on you forever and a day hand and foot
ain't no way you're ever gon' get any less than you should – amen!

never will I settle. and by that I mean there are certain traits that will never be tolerated. The worst is being insecure; so much so that you are over-bearing, controlling through manipulation, covet and show signs of neediness. all gross and totally unattractive! This woman absolutely requires stability. We all have insecurities. that’s a given. but when they are so bad that when I say “I love you” and do my best to SHOW that I love you and you STILL question it……seek counseling! preferably as a couple. We ALL deserve to be loved and when someone is showing genuine love and you don’t get it…..knock knock?!

it’s amazing how much traveling and work I’ve gotten since august. from corvallis to ojai to corvallis for a second [do-over] trip. photo shoots lined up since july. a few new fans. I’ve even been on a few dates which is a whole other post in itself. but needless to say, life has taken a turn towards fulfillment. I have taken the past few months to indulge in the love of family and friends from the travel, halloween parties, dinner parties, gno, the wedding[!], and just the amazing new people I have allowed myself to be opened up to bringing into my life. I am loving my new ‘goat’ and the immediate connect we made back in september. wonder twins! come december, we’ll be at the end of 5 months of indulgence. as we enter january, it will be time for spirituality aka prayer. I anticipate more yoga with ava. the yoga in the park with our squirrel friend makes for a great start to a perfect day! and because I have already extended the invite, I look forward to the deep spiritual connection that will manifest into a beautiful foundation to a life-long friendship with my spiritual guru who sat on my couch pretending he knew how to play the guitar.

And for those who follow viv on facebook we have started 365 days of gratitude. this began when I saw people posting 24 days of thanks leading to thanksgiving. I think it’s just as important to give thanks every other day of the year and today is day 321! so, if you haven’t already, follow and post YOUR FIVE!

my FIVE:

1. clouds. they mesmerize me!

2. ocean. It soothes my soul!

3. birds. they sing to me!

4. stars! they light up the night sky!

5. marshmallows. they make me smile!

ojai - ish

2011-11-16T19:59:00.001-08:00

ojai is the ish. if you've not been, you must! just outside of venture in the valley, it is like a hidden escape. to go from city to country in a matter of minutes and to be offered so much character - who wouldn't want to stay?

as lola and I entered ojai, we passed a few cute shops/lounges and one I wanted so badly to go inside to snap some pics but for the life of me couldn't figure out HOW to get inside. "big buddha lounge", greet me with open doors next time, k?!

before checking in, we made a pit stop at just jenna's place for a glass of vino and leg stretch. I love her backyard retreat! jj & bob did a great job creating a sanctuary filled with beautiful open spaces, the bird aviary, the koi pond and a few sitting areas. simply lovely! again, should be a ritual!

we left jj's and headed over to the capri to get checked in and settle. entered our room and made our way outside to the patio where more relaxation ensued. and for the record, jj, YOU are stunning! this is my fave shot taken of you this whole weekend.

saturday morning, we enjoyed a quick continental breakfast & the second of our chicken four way burritos. sneaky girls we are. and then the guru arrived. swim suits on, food packed, water and wine and we headed out making our way to the hot springs. a quick pit stop at the westridge market for some last minute snacks and I couldn't resist capturing some of the beauty within the market.

we headed up the hwy towards the hot springs and off to the side of the road we saw what looked like a ferrari convention. like an amateur, my camera was ready as we jetted past the several parked sports cars. my fave was the powered blue. its such a chicks car but there they were....all men.

we stopped at the infamous water fall rock to place our hands and could hear a loud rumble coming up the hwy. I had crossed the two lane swirvy road to capture a pic of the stream with nothing but about 2 feet of space between me and the possible car that might wrap itself around the curve as the ferraris came up in the opposite direction. in awe and fear I sat, again, like an amateur, in fear of dying and too giggling giddily as these beautiful cars paraded by, engines humming. I might need one!

we finally made it to hot springs which I may not have mentioned in my post a year ago has a lot of nudity. you could get a good game of croquet - if you know what I mean. and like a smart photographer, I didn't snap any of that tomfoolery. but lola made a point of snapping several of me soaking in the very well heated hot spring pool.

in my previous post I told you that we stopped at the corrales for the four way which was soooo good, I can only hope that we make that a weekend in ojai ritual. WOW! on saturday, after we took a trek to the hot springs and only AFTER I recovered from the sudden dizzy spell that came over me. tummy turning, white spots & all. it took some serious inner strength I had to muster up to make the climb back up the steep hill that lead to road where we'd parked. I had to stop several times and take deep breaths before finally reaching the top. I nearly fainted; something I've never done in my life. I sat in the dead thistle uncaring that it would stick to my bum and took my final rest before making my way to the car.

I said it then, I'll say it again, "thank you for loving me!" lola turned on karunesh while the guru let the sun warm my skin and massaged my head to relieve the pressure that had built up making me so weak. within in minutes, I was like a rock star. up and ready to eat! to jolly kone we go!

soooooo good!

back in our room, we took some down time and silly girl, me, played with my bolster boyfriend. I WANT ONE CHRIS!

yep, I love him THAT much!

insert bodees here cause that's where went & that's what we ate and IT was divine!

after a night of indulgence and laughter at bodees due to reservations for 35, LOUD man a the table next to us whose guests seemed desperate to escape him....oh and very sweet gentleman who paid me the compliment on my way to the ladies room, "WOW! she is beautiful!" - thank you! we slept hard!

sunday, our last day, we began with breakfast at the ojai cafe emporium. we arrived to a wait that jj insisted was worth waiting for. and all I'm sharing is lola's knife with the left over grub that no one dared lick off.

and on our last adventure, we traveled the roads through ojai and got snap happy. I will share a whole other post with nothing but photos from the final adventure.

"happy trails to you, until we meet again." | dale evans