the slack daily

Things I Learned From Superbowl Ads.

2010-02-07T19:35:43-08:00

1. I shouldn't abort my child because one day she may have the chance to become a GoDaddy Girl.

2. The Lilly Ledbetter Act now extends to personal hygiene products! Men now get the opportunity to buy smelly products they don't need. FINALLY, equal opportunity! You've come a long way, baby.

3. Costumers on commercials have a secret stash of slight-used tidy-whiteys. (I can only hope they receive hazard pay.)

4. What was missing was the Robert Blake/OJ Simpson crossover ad where they meet at the Sbarro in the mall food court after being dragged shopping by their overbearing wives.

5. Mrs. Tebow might reassess her position on the right to choose if she was forced to sit in First Class with an E*Trade baby.

Winners? Anyone who got paid to create that violent, misogynistic, and most importantly UNFUNNY piece of crap. Viva mediocrity!

Also a winner? Willie Ames, who did a fabulous job singing at the halftime show. I think he's proved to Hollywood that he's finally ready for the way-overdue Pirate Movie 2.

Losers? All of us who didn't fast-forward through the commercials. I like my misogynists classy. (Looking at you, Don Draper.)

You can find the rest of my Livetweets from the Superbowl here. And while you're at it, check out Caissie St. Onge, Tom Scharpling, Paul F. Tompkins and Sara Benincasa.

Square Pegs, aka New Media & the WGA.

2010-02-06T19:04:57-08:00

(For first-time readers: I've written for TV, Web, Mobile platforms and been a member of the WGAw since 2000. You can read more about my background and work experience here.)

This afternoon I attended the WGAw/MEF panel "Content Creation for Mobile Devices." There were some incredibly informed people on the first panel*, including Ryan Stoner of Omelet LA and Steven Hein of FOX.

While it was clear that the panelists all were not only knowledgeable but also successful in their fields, I wondered about the audience. The panel was open only to WGAw and WGA Caucus members; the 75-person venue was sold out, and there was an "overflow room" which housed another fifty or so members. We all know that digital content creation - whether used as a tool to further extend conventional TV and film narratives, or as a primary distribution method - is where we're all headed. I applaud the WGA for recognizing this and attempting to create a forum for its members to learn more about storytelling on different platforms.

However, what was shocking to me is the lack of participation on those platforms.

Prior to attending the panel, I searched twitter for "mobile" and "WGA." I saw one hit - one of the panel members, Steven Hein. I arrived a few minutes early and had the opportunity to speak with Steven and told him that if there wasn't an agreed-upon hashtag for the conference, I'd be using #WGAmob.

As we all took our seats, we were told by WGA's New Media Project Manager Tamara Krinsky to use the hashtag #MEFWGA (I was impressed they were on top of it!), and we were encouraged to ask questions using this hashtag on Twitter.

Again, the panel was incredibly informative, and I imagine if I hadn't already worked on New Media projects like Woke Up Dead and Valemont that I would have learned more. But what shocked me was that, in the 100+ person audience, there appeared to only be 3-5 of us on Twitter. As I followed the #MEFWGA hashtag, I realized that it was...pretty much just me.

We were at a panel discussing creating content for mobile devices. While not solely mobile, Twitter is a popular mobile application. And yet...no one used it. Which got me to wondering if anyone used it?

How can one expect to create content for platforms we know nothing about?

I discussed this briefly with Miss Krinksy, who said that she thought people needed a reason to use platforms. And I don't disagree. At the inaugural Transmedia-LA meeting, we discussed how there seems to be a rush to tick off boxes on transmedia projects. (Don't know what transmedia storytelling is? Click here.)

However, if we expect to create for those platforms, shouldn't we understand what they're capable of? Social media isn't just media. It's SOCIAL. You don't tell the same stories at a job interview that you do at a cocktail party. Each nugget of social interaction is governed by sometimes specific, sometimes general rules.

The first time I had dinner at the Hotel Bel Air, I was terrified that I would use the wrong fork or speak too loudly or pronounce my entree incorrectly even though I had taken seven years of French. I wasn't comfortable with the social rules, so I listened, I watched, and I "got it" by the time dessert was served. (In fact, I became so comfortable that the second time I had dinner at the Hotel Bel Air, I passed out in the restaurant's plush bathroom. Back medication and martinis don't mix, kids.)

Platforms live and breathe the same way. Blogging is different that SMS messaging is different than Twitter is different than Facebook is different than email is different than voicemail I don't know, if as the brilliant and forward-thinking Jan Libby mused, that people are expecting to "wing it" when it comes to these options, or if they're afraid of the technology.

As a writer, I'm attempting to take advantage of the unique properties of each platform** to create, as my boss and mentor Brent Friedman*** likes to say, "universes worthy of devotion..." You don't need a WGA card to tell stories across these platforms. (See Jay Bushman's CtHalloween, or my husband's 3 Tweet Stories.)

Writers would do themselves a huge favor by learning about these platforms, at the very least becoming an observer if not an active participant. It's not difficult, but it is different.

And if we want to write in New Media, we have to be prepared to experience and embrace the part that's "New."

*I did not stay for the second panel.
**You can see my talk at the 140# conference "How I Became a Zombie on Twitter" (on the benefit of Twitter for characters) here.
***He may have been quoting someone else. Not that you're not a smartypants, Brent!

Hooray for Hollywood!

2010-02-01T12:31:58-08:00

Last night, Will and I went with a few friends to catch "Better Off Dead" at the Aero in Santa Monica. The extra-awesome catch? There was LIVE COMMENTARY provided by Savage Steve Holland, E.G. Daily, Diane Franklin and Curtis Armstrong. How could we not go?

...

Lizzie McGuire was my first writing job, ever. I had been working around sitcoms with my boss at the time, and had even had the good fortune to hang out in a few Writers' Rooms. I was banging out spec scripts with my writing partner (and older brother) and watching my 30th year looming on the horizon. I wondered if perhaps I should pack up and go home.

My boss, Susan - also a friend and mentor (and someone that I have not talked to in ages because I suck, and I need to remedy that, stat) - asked me to give her just one more TV season to see if she could get us a job. Let me repeat that for the cheap seats.

She asked me to give her one more TV season to see if she could get us a job.

Talk about an offer you couldn't refuse.

I loved working for Susan, but she knew that I didn't want to be fetching lattes when I was 30.

Six months later, there was a knock on my front door. I opened it. Susan walked in, sat down on the couch and said congratulations, you're a Staff Writer on Lizzie McGuire.

Disney had asked Susan to run Lizzie, and the first thing she did was hire us. It was a weird feeling, and after hugging her with what I'm sure was a slack-jawed expression and promises that the details would be worked out later, I sat down on the couch with my dog Thurber and said it out loud. I'm a writer. I have a writing job.

Flash forward months later and I'm in the thick of writing for Lizzie (which at that point was called "What's Lizzie Thinking?") Story meetings and Writers' Rooms and walking down to stage to watch the sets being built. Our first episode began shooting on my older brother's 30th birthday. Life was good.

And it was about to get better.

Around Thanksgiving, I checked the directing schedule to see who would be shooting our next episode. The name? Savage Steve Holland.

I ran up to our office (which had formerly hosted the staff of I Love Lucy, and hadn't been updated since) and shared the news. SAVAGE STEVE HOLLAND. Writer and director of Better Off Dead, which was one a cornerstone of our comedy development, WAS DIRECTING SOMETHING WE WROTE. (I believe the episode was Obsession, but I could be wrong.)

I returned to work after holiday break filled with nervous energy.I checked in at the office to discover that even thought it was 11:30am, everyone on set had already broken for lunch. They were ahead of schedule. I ran down to the stage, ignoring craft service to find our 2nd AD. I finally found Polly and asked where I could find Mr. Holland. She laughed and pointed me to the cafeteria set.

I poked my head in to see him eating at a lunch table, alone.

Here's something you may not know about me: I don't get star-struck. Maybe it's a function of living and working out here, I don't know. But that day, I was shaking I was so incredibly nervous as I approached someone who was such an inspiration to me, in a TV set that mimicked my own Junior High cafeteria where my friends and I discussed Better Off Dead over greasy slices of pizza and Diet Cokes.

To this day, I'm not exactly sure what I said, but I think it was something like

Mr., um, Savage Holland, uh, sir...

Over the next couple of years, our paths crossed on Lizzie, and then he talked to us about a project he wanted to bring us in on. We couldn't comprehend it. He wanted to work with US? Unfortunately, that project went nowhere (as projects sometimes go.) With the craziness of life, the universe and everything, it had been a few years since I saw Savage last.

As Will and I approached the theatre, I was delighted to see all of the fans, all of us who knew each line of dialog. We found our seats with Dan and Chia and Joe and everyone applauded as Savage and the rest of the cast made their way to the front of the theatre. It was less like a screening and more like a party as we all watched together. There's something about being with a bunch of awesome people honoring someone that you think is awesome that is just, well, awesome.

There are so many stories of people crapping all over each other in Hollywood. I've probably told a few of them myself. But last night I was reminded of how lucky I've been to work with the people that I've worked with. I've had the opportunity to meet with those who have inspired me, and now I have the honor of calling them friends.

And it reminded me that I'd like to work with a lot of them again. So I'd better get to work.

How (Not) to Make It In Hollywood

2010-01-27T10:47:26-08:00

I received this email yesterday:

I responded:

He replied:

The point: ------------------>

Him: x

I realized I had written about this a few years back. With a quick re-read, it all still pretty much rings true.

I bring you from the 2005 archives of theslack.com: So You Wanna Be in Showbiz?

so you wanna be in showbiz?

My friend S. describes working in showbiz as a slippery rock in the midst of the stormy sea. Most people are flailing in the water, she says, but if you can just get one palm on that rock, just one hand to pull yourself up, you’re in. Sure, the climb’s a bitch and you can easily fall back into the sea. Grip that rock as hard as you can and you’ll build enough strength to reach back into the water and pull someone up with you.

In the last few months, I’ve been the recipient of many a hey-I-heard-you-do-this-writing-thing-and-I-want-to-write/direct/produce/draw/act/do voice over/be a P.A./anything at all to suckle at the Hollywood teat. Do you have some pointers on getting that first job? Some people know me through family or friends. Some are from my alma mater. Some are just people who poke around online and randomly find my site. I try to help all of them because someone helped me. Most people are wonderful, gracious and polite. But I’ve had more than my share of bad turns as well.

So here’s some advice if you want to participate in the game of ever-revolving musical chairs that is working in showbiz.

DON’T be afraid to ask. Most people are willing to help. The brilliant thing about the Internet is that everyone has an email address.

DO write a polite, short email explaining who you are and what you want to do. If you were referred by someone, make sure to use their name.

DO ask for an informational interview. While everyone in this town is always busy, don’t underestimate the power of the ego. Most people love to talk about themselves. I'm no different. Have you ever read through this entire site? Pages and pages of me, me, me.

DON’T say you were referred by someone when you weren’t. You’ll get caught, and then you’re just a liar who’s pretending to be someone you aren’t. Which is everyone in Hollywood, it’s just by the time everyone else figures it out, you already have a job.

DO know something about the person you’re writing to/calling/sending a carrier pigeon to. You don’t need to stalk them gee, that red shirt looked great on you Tuesday. Oh, and when I was at your house going through your panty drawer I fed the dog. It's called IMDB. (2010 Note: Or Google.)

DO know something about the business that you’re interested in. I get a lot of Oh! I want to work in teevee! emails and when I respond asking what their area of interest is in, the email back reads oh, anything. If you don’t know what you want to do for a living, how the hell am I going to know?

A caveat: some industries – like animation fr’example – have many different facets. If you’re an artist who wants to work in cartoons, you might be a character designer, do backgrounds or be a storyboard artist. Or perhaps you're more interested in CGI. Learn as much about that industry if you can by picking the brains of those people who work in the business. (See: step one, informational interview.)

DON’T always assume that the guy at the top is the only person who’s worth seeing. When I was a college senior, I wangled my way into an informational interview with Alan Horn, now President of Warner Bros., then-President of Castle Rock Entertainment. We chatted for about twenty minutes and he offered me a job as a reader at his company when I graduated in three months. I was the only senior in my graduating class with a job in the Industry! The day before I moved to California I called his office only to be told that there were no jobs to be had. D’oh!

DON’T ask for one favor hoping for another. I had someone who asked me how to get a job as a P.A. in animation. I came up of a list of companies for her to submit her resume to, as well as getting her the name of the Cartoon Network H.R. person. About three emails later she started talking about her voice over demo. If she wanted help with her voice over demo, she should have started with that. But don’t schnorr it in later.

DO hustle. Everyone likes to help those who help themselves. If your contact gives you a list of companies and people to contact, contact ALL of them. There is nothing more annoying than to hear well, I contacted one of them and they said they weren’t hiring so I stopped. If one ‘no’ is enough to thwart your effort, then go work at Blockbuster. (2010 Note: Blockbuster may no longer exist.)

DO bring an example of whatever it is you’d like to do. If you’re an animator, have a portfolio. If you’re a writer, have a script. An actor should have a headshot. If you don’t have these right away or at the time that you’re meeting with your contact, make sure to have something together shortly afterward. You wait too long and you’ll be forgotten, or show them that you can’t work quickly.

DON’T show a less-than-stellar effort. Don’t show a first draft, an unmixed tape, an unfinished drawing. It’s hard to get someone to take the time to look at your work once, much less twice. You only get one shot, so make sure you aim first.

DO take notes graciously and incorporate them. I cannot tell you how many scripts I’ve gotten over the past five years that people are incensed that I’ve given them notes. I don’t care if Aunt Gladys or your professor or your best friend thinks it’s the best thing that they’ve ever read. I’ve actually stopped reading scripts because I’m sick of arguing with people over notes. (2010 Note: See "I Will Not Read Your Fucking Script.")

A caveat: yes, there are brilliant movies out there. But none of these have ever been scripts that were given to me. If you can’t believe that your script is anything less than perfect, then get a credit card and make it yourself.

DON’T ask to have your script/demo/headshot to be passed along to your contact’s agent or manager. No, it’s not because I’m jealous. Every person I recommend to an agent, every person I recommend for a job, every person is a reflection of me and my taste. When I submit my own work, I don’t waste my agent or manager’s time with a less than stellar effort (and see above – they don’t always agree!) so I won’t waste their time with yours. (2010 Note: I am currently unrepresented. I have currently ceased my search for representation until I build my script library to the point where I have more than one sample.)

A caveat: if you’ve taken the time to take notes, rewrite and rework and the script is ready, I’m happy to pass it along. You know how many times that’s happened in five years? Not once. (2010 Note: In ten years? STILL NOT ONCE.)

DON’T use someone to get to their boyfriend/wife/brother/second-cousin-once-removed. Just don’t. It’s the most transparent thing you can do, a tacky and tasteless move, and an assurance that that person will NEVER help you.

DO be gracious. Say thank you. An email is sufficient, a written note even better, and if your contact has gone above an beyond, a small (small!) token of appreciation can make all the difference.

DON’T forget the assistant. If you’re talking with someone who has one, make sure that you get the assistant’s name and include them on your thank-yous. The Hollywood Assistant is the gatekeeper to the kingdom. You overlook them and your name isn’t on the call sheet any more.

DO turn in your work. Follow up with how you’ve taken the person’s advice or address the notes that you’ve been given. My ex used to tell me about people who come in to take drawing tests for his show who never turned them back in, or would turn them in six months later. All people we’d hire, he would tell me, but if they can’t bother to turn the damn thing in I don’t want them on my crew.

This all seems like common sense, but in the past ten years, I still see these BASIC rules being broken.

The woman who wanted the P.A. job in Animation? I would have personally walked in her resume. If she asked me up front about her voice over demo instead of bringing it up later, I could have handed it to a Voice Director After I had passed along what I had found out, I never heard from her again. She never followed up. She never wrote a thank you note.

Her loss. There’s plenty other people in the sea.

I'm currently working on my second original spec pilot (amongst other things...) When it's done, I will ask people for favors. To read it. To note it. To read the rewrite. And I will follow every one of the rules above. Because even after working in this business for nearly ten years...THEY APPLY TO EVERYONE.

Et Tu, When in Rome?

2010-01-26T13:47:34-08:00

There's a little RomCom coming out called "When in Rome." You probably know this from hanging out around the bus stop and wondering why Kristen Bell is chewing on her finger "seductively" (who decided the finger chew was seductive? FREUD HAS GONE TOO FAR, PEOPLE) while Josh Duhamel lurks over her, deciding apparently whether to date her or serve her for dinner.

In the grand tradition of Commedia Macchina Del Pagliacci, Big People + Little Car = Nonstop Laughs.

I imagined that this movie would deliver exactly what they've promised.

OR WOULD THEY?

Watching the last episode of Late Night with Conan O'Brien, the ads for the movie were running non-stop. And something caught my eye...

Can't see it? Maybe this will help:

When in Rome, did you think that we'd be so hypnotized by your finger-chewing that we wouldn't notice that Ryan W. has called your cinematic efforts "a perfect romantic comedy?"

I do not purport to know all the men in all the lands who see all of the movies. But I have never heard of a gentleman calling anything a perfect romantic comedy.

I had to investigate further. Who was this "Ryan W?" What made him tick? Did he have some sort of disorder that made him speak solely in cinematic clichés?

I'm no Woodward (or Bernstein, for that matter) but the first clue was STARING RIGHT BACK AT ME.

No, not the chewy finger. The website.

I dug through every comment written on the Facebook site.

THERE IS NO RYAN W. WHO EVER SAID THAT.

Your move, When in Rome. YOUR MOVE.

Edited to add: When I checked on Saturday, the reviews section read "no reviews." And now...Ryan W has magically appeared. I guess I can only protest this movie on finger-chewing alone. Oh Ryan. I repescted you so much more when you were fake.

(Thanks to Blahspam for the catch.)

Some of you may notice a fancy new RSS Feed to your left. No, higher. That's for the BetheMarriage LIVE! podcast - an edited down audio version of our weekly show. The podcast will be available on iTunes eventually. It's listed now, but there was a cock-up with the RSS feed (only partially my fault) and it needs to be revised. You'd think with the Magic of the Internet(tm) this would take an hour, tops. You'd be wrong. In the meantime, do NOT subscribe to the show on iTunes (YET.) If you don't use iTunes, then enjoy the feed to your left. Or don't. I'm not the boss of you.