The Snorting Gigglesaurus

Lucy Rose Coming in 5 Days

2011-07-06T15:53:00.002-04:00

It is an odd, odd feeling to know that you most likely will have a baby within a such and such date and at that moment you will become a parent. It's even more odd when they give you the exact date with a time and tell you to show up at 5:30am to have a baby at 7:30 am.

Yep. I am talking about my scheduled c-section that I will be having this Monday, 7/11/11. For medical reasons I have chose not to deliver vaginally, aka normally as some people like to say, and that used to bother me and make me feel like a freak. I'm happy to say I've now put that hang up aside and am happy and proud to deliver my baby in a way of which my body can be accustomed to. (and at the same time I am thrilled that ALL Mommas get to be an active voice in their own birthing plan, whether they be "normal" or "strange" or whatever you want to label it with)

Both Alan, Henry and I are very excited about this new family member. Her name shall be Lucy Rose. The middle name, Rose, is after my favorite aunt, my mini-aunt Rose Ann.

Despite the pain, this pregnancy has been so much more enjoyable this time. My husband and I are in a better place relationship wise and I'm a less selfish and more laid back person thanks to having Henry.

Wouldn't you know it, Alan got tickets through work to see the Cardinals this Sunday. I've been chomping at the bit to see a Cardinals game since we moved to Saint Louis last year. And now that I am a million years pregnant and hardly able to walk due to my SPD we get tickets. So I'm on the fence. It's going to be sunny and 91 that day and I don't know if I'm up to it. What do you think? I think I would be miserable...plus I have this romantic idea of drinking beer while watching a MLB game and um, I can't do that really now. There will be other games, yes?

My Mom drives in Friday night to be here to take care of Henry while Alan and I are at the hospital. Alan will be back and forth but I will most likely be in the hospital until Thursday. Then Mom will go home that Sunday, Alan will have the next week off and then my Mother in Law comes in to help for a couple of weeks. I am going to listen to my recovery instructions much better this time so as not to have any stitches reopening like last time. It will be hard because I am not to lift anything more than a newborn for 6 weeks meaning Henry.

So yea, I'll do all my updates through my IPhone on Facebook. Wish us luck!

It has a name and it's name is EM-MO

2011-06-06T22:14:00.002-04:00

Just a few short, very sweet and very endearing things my little boy does that makes me fall in love with him every day.

He has some terry cloth bibs with Elmo a Cookie Monster on them that he took an immediate liking too. Not for the purpose they are intended to be used, but to be his little "lovie" or "blankey". Comfort item du jour. He requests his Em-MO like so, "Em-MO? Em-MO?" with a hint of a french accent. I swear. Since his habit started we are now quick to pick up the same set of bibs when we are out and about knowing that we will lose (like the one we lost at the OB visit - oops, went right in the trash) some and some will get beyond repair or need to be washed at the same time. The other thing that is cute is that his Em-MO doesn't have to be Elmo. It can be Cookie Monster or a character from Cars. He just has a hankering for the terry cloth.

Today at the park Henry picked up a nearly dead cicada. I did very well to go over there to tell him that the life was leaving the body of the insect and tell him to gently put it down. He understood, placed it on the ground and said, "Bye bye cayda!" and then he stomped on it. Well, you win some lose some.

At story time today at Whole Foods they brought service animal dogs (dogs that are trained to help those with disabilities) and each trainer would read a story with her dog by her side and then the kids would get a chance to pet the animal and ask questions. It was really sweet and all was going well until balloons were spotted. Now this was our first experience with balloons being blown up and kids bouncing them around and making noises with them and my little boy was a trembling mess. I mean he was shaking!! Scared!! And since I myself have a bit of a fear of the balloons I didn't even ask any questions. That was that and we left.

We have been getting out of the house almost every day for the past two weeks and I know part of it is guilt. I am feeling sad that these days with my little boy unshared are numbered and I also want him to get to go out of the house and experience summer (my favorite season) because when Lucy gets here it will be quite an adjustment on him. I can't do anything about that, just make it as easy as possible, be fair and be realistic and I think we all know I'm crazy enough to do it.

Sloppy post and updates

2011-06-03T13:17:00.004-04:00

Never in my life have I been more thankful for quality air conditioning than I am right now. I just like to sit in my room with the lights dim, the fan pointed on me and marinate in the coolness.

Hormones have me hot. Plus the extra weight I am carrying around.

It's June.

First June in Saint Louis. I am not sure why I felt like it was worth mentioning, but I did.

We're in the middle of some 13 year cicada hatch that has me seriously hating nature. Cicadas every freaking where. I'm ready for them to do their thing and die already.

This pregnancy has been both a lot easier and a lot harder than I thought. Easier because I had very minimal bothersome symptoms until third trimester. Easier because keeping up with Henry (20mo's now!) is a lot easier being more fit this pregnancy. Easier because a lot of the environmental factors that played into my last pregnancy are now gone. Harder because I have SPD and it is very painful and disheartening. It's hard to get up and get motivated when, at 7am, you are already in so much pain. But I am trying not to complain too much and just work through it because there is a good chance that most of the pain will dissapear once Lucy gets here.

Speaking of Lucy, that's her name! We're still working on middle names. I go in for my csection on 7-11-11. It'll be a lucky day, a lucky birthday.

That's all I got for now.

Identify THIS!

2011-04-15T16:38:00.004-04:00

Quite frankly, I am having an identity crisis as a writer, as a blogger. This is why you see so few posts from me for like, well, the past year and a half.

The natural step seems to be closing up this blog and setting up another. A semi-anonymous blog, perhaps? Private? I'm not sure.

All things sweet and bread-a-licious

2011-02-09T16:37:00.004-05:00

Bread and chocolate.

Chocolate and bread.

Bread dipped in chocolate? Sure! Why the hell not.

I am fighting this serious urge for all things dangerously delicious. I have a baked goods addiction. This pregnancy I have craved nothing but sweets and carbs. OMG nom nom drool nom.

We find out on the 25th of February if we're having a boy or girl this time around!

Stay tuned.

Better than the Rest

2011-01-28T16:19:00.002-05:00

This week has been better than the rest of the weeks in January.

Without complaining too much I just will say that I am so sick, sick of winter and all her drying, freezing glory.

Today was a saving grace. Although it doesn't sound like much it was sunny today and warmed up to 45 so we went for a walk in the sunshine.

To combat my blues I have been working out a lot lately. Well, I say working out but really it's just walking on the treadmill and biking at the gym. I am so very thankful that we were able to get a membership to The Lodge Des Peres. The Lodge is basically a really cool recreation center in my community that has a fitness center, pool and many other amenities. It's really great AND they have tot-care which means that Henry can hang out and play with other toddlers while I work out. Superb. I can't tell you how much working out helps me with my depression issues. It's also empowering and gives me something to feel proud about.

So, I've been feeling a lot like I'm pregnant lately! First trimester was a breeze and so unlike my pregnancy with Henry. Up until the past couple of weeks I've had to kind of remind myself that I'm pregnant! I'm still feeling good just completely worn out by the end of the day. Sometimes I go to bed right after we put Henry down, around 8pm and I am out like a light. I'm just getting in all the sleep I can as long as I can. I have an appointment on Monday - I'll be 16 weeks. I think we'll get to find out the sex at my 20th week appointment, so the end of February, first of March. I am so excited about that!

Speaking of babies, Alan's sister is due on Monday! I'll have my first niece!! Super stoked about that.

Squirrels

2011-01-20T16:16:00.003-05:00

Here's a little something that may make you laugh and we've been dealing with over the past two weeks:

We have squirrels that are residing in the walls of our *rental* home.

You read that right. Giant, fluffy, gnawing, grey squirrels have chewed or clawed through the roofing in this house and made their way in our HVAC system. There's really no danger of them getting out, this I am sure of. Well, I'm sure there's a small danger but very, very unlikely.

So when you have giant squirrels sharing your residence, that you RENT by the way, you let your landlord know, right? And you'd think that the landlord would first be concerned about your safety and secondly be concerned about his financial investment in the residence and said landlord would send a specialist out as soon as possible to fix and remove vermin from the home. Right? Am I being unreasonable here?

Apparently I am. Because it will be 2 weeks tomorrow(Friday) since we first notified our landlord of this problem. They send a maintenance man out that following Monday who slapped some sheet metal on the roof and told me he'd be back the next day to place traps down. Well, it snowed and he never showed up. When I called him 2 days later he told me he had "lost his trap" and was searching for it. In the meantime the squirrels have gnawed a new hole in the roof and now we've had another snow storm which means that even IF he finds his stupid trap he won't be able to place the trap as he'll have to get on the roof to do so and we have 9 inches of snow that ain't gonna melt any time soon.

So now we're going on 2 weeks since we notified landlord of the problem and over one week since we've spoke to the maintenance man about coming back out.

I refuse to call our landlord again as I feel like I'm treated like I'm the hysterical crazy woman with squirrels in the house. Alan has called twice with no return call and we refuse to pay out of pocket to remove the squirrels.

We'll be sending a certified letter on Monday just stating the problem in writing so that when we move out in July (hopefully!) it won't be turned back around on us.

I'm totally at the end of my rope on this and I know that while there are definitely good landlord/tenant relationships we are not lucky enough to have one and I am hopeful that I'll never have to rent a house again in my life.

Good Things

2011-01-13T16:05:00.003-05:00

So while I was on an extensive blogging break I went and got myself knocked up.

That's right. I'm pregnant! 14 weeks.

We're very happy and although we weren't expecting it to happen so soon, well, sometimes these things happen, right?

I am excited to have a little brother or sister for Henry that will be so close in age, less than 2 years apart. My brother and I are 5 years apart and were never really play mates when we were growing up. We get along well now, but when you're kids, 5 years is a huge age difference.

You don't have to tell me it's going to be a lot of work having two so close in age, I know it will be. I am also not afraid or stressed (yet). I just think that there's millions of Mom's and Dad's who do it everyday with a lot less than what I have.

I am hoping to write more and am setting a small goal for updating the blog. I want to update at least once a week. I do know I benefit from writing and that it's something that makes me feel good, so it's a priority.

It's freakin' FREEZING in Saint Louis and really everywhere else right now. It's been quite a shock to go from NC winters to MO winters and I thought it was going to be an easy adjustment since I grew up in OK but guess what? It's been hard as hell adjusting. I miss the sun most of all, although we do get sun breaks every few days or so.

I've still not made any friends here, which is very discouraging to me. I am trying though. I've joined a couple of Moms groups on meetup.com and am very hopeful that I'll have some luck. It can be very lonely being a stay at home Mom.

Henry is doing great! He's so much fun and learning more and more every day. He's getting more and more opinionated and independent which is great and very trying. He definitely got his patience level from me, which is like NONE.

So all is well and I hope this blog entry finds you in good health and good time. :)

Until next week.

Stranger to my own blog

2010-11-01T16:21:00.002-04:00

It has been a while and a half, huh?

I guess moving to a new city and having a toddler will do that to you.

Plus, I've kind of just lost interest in writing a blog. But I am interested in reading all about everyone else and their fabulous/tumultuous/fun filled lives!

See, what happened was I got an Iphone. And I'm on it constantly. It's made my broken down lap top converted desktop kind of a pain in the ass.

Plus basically everyone on here knows me on Facebook where I am REAL GOOD about updating every ten minutes. (fb and twitter addict, hello).

So, if you are interested in keeping up with me there and are not already, drop me a line. I'd be happy to add you.

Life's a journey, why not shout the whole ride? <----my semi new motto.

I'm not saying I'm closing down my blog but you've probably already lost interest in visiting this site, so I don't want to leave anyone hanging. You know, because my life is SOOOOO exciting.

Two Bath Kind of Day

2010-08-03T16:14:00.002-04:00

When Henry has a "bad" day, you know, cranky, teething, non-stop crying I'll refer to it as a two bath kind of day. What this means is that the day has been so slow moving and trying that he takes two baths because it's the only thing that will make him stop being so irritable. He loves the bath and any type of water and if that makes him happy, well, no harm at all being extra clean!

Today I am feeling like I need two baths because it's so hot and gross outside. We're not getting the heat wave as bad as my friends and family in Tulsa but it's 103 outside right now.

My Grandmother in law and I went thrift store shopping today up in St. Charles. We got a dining room table and a retro lamp for under $50. AWESOME. Since we moved we gave up all of our furniture except our beds (and Henry's nursery furniture). Which wasn't really that much in all actuality. So right now we have no where to sit but our bed and I'm not really complaining. I think it's all part of the adventure and it's kind of like starting over again. Only this time I know what I really want or need. I want to live a new sort of home life here with a minimum amount of STUFF.

This grocery store by our house is OFF THE HOOK. There's a cooking school, pizza shoppe, cafe, coffee shop, deli and a massive bakery in it. I love it so much and I know I've mentioned it several times so I'm sure it's annoying but I cannot wait to show it off to my Mom and Stepdad when they come next weekend.

I'm really blogging again!

2010-08-02T17:28:00.004-04:00

Blah blah blah, I've moved to St. Louis,
blah blah blah,
wait.
What?
Yeah.

I know I haven't written in my blog for like, a year or some bunch but I think it's because every time I want to blog I think I need to lay everything out that has happened to me and my family in chronological order as it happened and the monstrosity of a project like that feels very intimidating to me. Kind of like catching up on a series of TV shows or dishes. Whatever you relate to more. :)

I'd like to pull the notebook sheet off my proverbial life notebook and start from scratch and backlog my adventures of traveling, moving, leaving good good great good friends and networks and just start fresh just like my real life is right now.

Is everyone okay with that? Are we all on the, ahem, same PAGE? Aahahahaha. I'm so punny.

Yeah.

So, here we are in the Midwest! I'm loving so many things about this place that I never really thought about. I live in a little suburb of STL that's really cute and not far enough away to lose its metropolitan flair. I'm living in an older house (to me, to me!) which has been very interesting and fun to experience. I think. It's not even really THAT old, but it's was built in 1946 which makes it the oldest house I've ever lived in. I can't wait until our budget allows for us to decorate it. (we're renting for the time being).

Henry is doing really well! He's 10 months old now and we're working on walking because let me tell you, carrying him around all day is killing my shoulders and back. He's very strong also which is no fun when he doesn't want to be held. More on him later.

Alan really likes his new job.

Andrea (ME!) is learning to go with the flow and be happy again. Seriously, I am feeling happy and relaxed and enjoying life more. "So what?!?" is my new mental head motto which is working for me right now.

Anyway, I am so glad to be back on the "scene" and get things rolling again.

Here are some pictures of Henry and the new house because, honestly, who wants to see pictures of Alan and I?!? ;)

15 Mins to think of a title, only to choose this

2010-06-27T21:49:00.006-04:00

Busy.

In the past 8 weeks we have, as a family, gone through, enjoyed, and stressed the following things in order:

Went to Saint Louis for a family visit (sis in law, bro in law & adorable nephew).
Wished telehubby good luck on an important job interview
returned back to Raleigh
found out telehubby got job, yay! Relocation is awesome, closer to family on both sides
had break down number one when I realized that moving from RDU to STL meant saying goodbye to my good friends in the RDU area
got excited that I would be closer to Tulsa friends!
couldn't tell RDU friends about move; hubby work related, complicated....
went on vacation to Oak Island, NC for a week. Yay! Fun! It was awesome, a little chaotic with 3 boys under 18 months in the house. Henry slept in one of the bathrooms (in his pack and play of course, and no, I am NOT joking. He loved it.
Discovered Henry loves the water. Since I was on the swim team in High School I experienced my first hope that my son would inherit something other than my sense of humor, my talent for swimming and love of the water
Returned from beach and started operation clean and get rid of items in the house
Shared the news with Raleigh friends that we had to move, sad, sad.
Had second break down when I thought of all that had to be done that I hadn't thought of before...discussed renting vs selling our RDU home. We're renting it out for the time.
My Mom arrived from Tulsa for a previously planned vacation on her part to help me with Henry while we packed and ran around the house like chickens on speed.
Since we do not have a home yet in STL we decided that I would stay with my parents for a couple weeks while Alan started his new job and found a rental home for us in STL. This meant that I would need to drive, with my baby boy, an 18 hr drive through 3 states.
Panic!!!
Bought new car seat for road trip
Packed enough clothes for 2 weeks for myself and Henry. Had to make it compact enough to fit in a VW Rabbit, plus Mom's luggage, pack and play (portable crib) and a stroller. Seriously like playing Tetris to get it all in there. Discovered Henry is a great traveler! Hotel for 2 nights, drove 3 days. It worked out perfect.
Arrived in Tulsa.
Started experiencing breakout symptoms of BPPV that are making me irritable, drugged out from nausea medicine and paranoid. Why paranoid? Because I am afraid I will fall with a baby in my arms. Or people are going to think I am drunk because of the slurring of occasional words and walking sideways.

We're all just a little exhausted of course. Thankful to be here with no problems and happy to have this adventure as a memory. We are hanging out here until we have word on a home in STL. Telehubby is staying at an hotel/apartment place. It sucks being apart and not knowing what's going on exactly. Could be much worse though.

Dear Henry on the 8th Month

2010-06-18T06:40:00.001-04:00

Oh Henry...

This little boy is growing so fast,

Saying Maa-maa or Mum or Mom more and more often and sometimes with purpose and not just a babble you make.

Henry,

You are a master crawler and you crawl with the uptmost speed, even faster if I crawl behind you threatening to tickle your chunky little legs.

You squeeeeeeel with delight and your awws and oooohs are even more cute now that I think you've figured out how to control the volume.

When you are mad you'll kick your legs and sometimes (to our delight!!) you'll say, "Nine nine NINE NINE NINE NINE!!!!" It's really hilarious, my little german.

You were born here in Raleigh, NC but you'll be one of those kids that will be growing up in a different place than you were born. I never was one of those kids. I lived in the same place my entire life until I moved to Raleigh...funny, huh?

Your eighth month has been joyfully stressful: Your Uncle John and Grandma and Grandpa Pautsch take off for India this Sunday (6/20/10) to meet your soon to be official Aunt Anwesha! We'll let you call her Aunt Weezy if you want to, When they get back next weekend we'll be gone. Daddy got a new job in St, Louis, MO. You, I and Nana-Jana will be in Tulsa while Daddy heads straight to Saint Louis to find us a home to rent. It'll be a good time to catch up and visit some of our OK family and friends.

This weekend will be our last one amongst our NC family of friends. I hope we get to see them all. They all love and adore you. One day I'm sure they'll tell stories about Mom & Dad that you won't want to hear. You know, shenanigans.

Either way you are growing most excellently, your sense of humor gets keener every day, and I swear your hair is growing a fourth an inch a day. To cut or not to cut?!?

I love you little boy and I'll never take that for granted.

The 8th Month

2010-06-17T21:11:00.002-04:00

Oh Henry...

This little boy is growing so fast,

Saying Maa-maa or Mum or Mom more and more often and sometimes with purpose and not just a babble you make.

Henry,

You are a master crawler and you crawl with the utmost speed, even faster if I crawl behind you threatening to tickle your chunky little legs.

You squeeeeeeel with delight and your awws and oooohs are even more cute now that I think you've figured out how to control the volume.

When you are mad you'll kick your legs and sometimes (to our delight!!) you'll say, "Nine nine NINE NINE NINE NINE!!!!" It's really hilarious, my little german.

You were born here in Raleigh, NC but you'll be one of those kids that will be growing up in a different place than you were born. I never was one of those kids. I lived in the same place my entire life until I moved to Raleigh...funny, huh?

Your eighth month has been joyfully stressful: Daddy got a new job in St, Louis, MO.Your Uncle John and Grandma and Grandpa Pautsch take off for India this Sunday (6/20/10) to meet your soon to be official Aunt Anwesha! We'll let you call her Aunt Weezy if you want to, When they get back next weekend we'll be gone. . You, I and -Jana will be in Tulsa while Daddy heads straight to Saint Louis to find us a home to rent. It'll be a good time to catch up and visit some of our OK family and friends.

This weekend will be our last one amongst our NC family of friends. I hope we get to see them all. They all love and adore you. One day I'm sure they'll tell stories about Mom & Dad that you won't want to hear. You know, shenanigans.

Either way you are growing most excellently, your sense of humor gets keener every day, and I swear your hair is growing a fourth an inch a day. To cut or not to cut?!?

I love you little boy and I'll never take that forgranted.

Moving to the STL!

2010-06-09T21:56:00.000-04:00

Moving On

I have news. Big news.

It's been almost 6 years. 6 years since I left "home" and moved down South to take a chance. I took a chance and put a lot on the line and it paid off. I've grown up so much. Made a lot of memories, met some of the best people, made wonderful family-like-always friends, got married, had a baby, saw friends get married and have babies, etc. Memories and stories that will never get old or tired of telling.

What happened? Life happened. Family happened.

It's all good.

We're moving back west. We're moving to Saint Louis, MO. Wow, huh?

It's a long story but my husband pretty much landed his dream job and I am so proud of him. The company is moving us and we'll be moving fast. His first day is the 28th of this month. I've had to be very quiet about this news and I'm happy and sad to share it. It's been really hard not to tell our friends until the last moment but it was a little bit out of our control. Luckily, everyone understands for the most part.

Right now we're in Oak Island, NC at the beach with Alan's family for a family vacation. When we get back to Raleigh we'll have like, 2 weeks to get everything done, organized and taken care of. Needless to say, it's going to be busy and crazy...and sad. :(

So if I'm quiet that's why. It's so hard to say goodbye and it brings up a lot of memories of leaving Tulsa and moving here to NC. I never thought I'd be so lucky to make such wonderful friends and here I am, better for knowing and learning and now moving on to learn and love more in a different place.

I'll really miss it here...and we'll definetely be back for visits. There's still the house to sell, half the family, friends, etc. This will always be where Henry was born, where we bought our first house and where we got married (in the house!). It'll never be the same, but it will be.

Got some dirt on my shoulders could you brush it off for me?

2010-05-27T20:44:00.003-04:00

I don't know why I got this thought that life was equal and just. Or that if it wasn't equal and just that I could MAKE it equal and just, or at least enforce it in my life. I feel as if I've done a pretty good job, that was until I had children. This is not a dig on my husband, just an emphisis on how self sacraficing mothers are/become/will be.

I used to have such an active social life. I had dinners, events, parties, etc. Granted most of them involved alcohol and celebration, it was still a party, a gathering of people I knew and loved. We got together, we drank, we ate. We were merry and made joy. coversations flowed and I was challenged in mind.

I was not a drone. Not a wallflower. I was an individual person with individual ideas. I made people laugh, I laughed at other people. We conversated about current events, personal dramas, food, fashion, politics, etc. I was smart at one point.

Now I just feel like I'm sucking oxygen up in an already over populated world. A waste of space. A drone.

Don't cue the violins. I don't expect nor care if I garner any sympathy. My favorite thought of the moment is, "it is what it is".

I feel like a jerk. I'm a stay at home Mom and I should be counting my blessings that I am blessed enough to be able to stay at home and enjoy the day with my son. I do enjoy it...I'm just bored. I'm bored and jaded. I miss working. You know, the whole "the grass is greener on the other side" thing? I'm having a hard time with it. I really do think the grass is greener on the other side and I wanna lay on that.

I want to go out after work with friends and have a few drinks. I want to drive home after having one glass of wine without feeling completely guilty. I want to be Andrea.

This Mother role is hard. The hardest role I've ever played. I have to be completely self sacrificing, put others before me 24/7, be happy when I could give a shit and do fucking housework on top of it. Quite frankly, it's a crappy gig. And it never, ever, ever, ever ends.

The rewards are great and I love my son; please if you ever doubt anything about me, don't ever doubt that. I also have no doubt that I'm a good mother and a good wife.

But like I said I am bored, my brain is dead and I just want to scream to my husband, "It's NOT FAIR!!!!!".

P.S. This is an honest to God conversation in my mind. If you are offended or can't handle it, blow off.

Laundry and Crawling

2010-05-24T16:34:00.002-04:00

HOLY SHIT. I FINALLY CAUGHT OUR LAUNDRY UP.

That's the accomplishment today. For a week I have been trying to tackle this never ending laundry battle of all sorts of evil socks, burp cloths, underwear, blankets, never ending.

This girl has now decided to SORT laundry now which I've never done before in my life, but now I must concede and submit. Sorting laundry, never thought I'd do that. Never thought I'd write a blog about laundry or get excited about it but such is my life now. Different, fun. Like reading about it seems lame but it's not because it's an a BATTLE and I will WIN.

For the record I will still not IRON.

Why am I using all these CAPS? I just it's because when you read it just imagine me being EXTRA DRAMATIC when I SAY the CAPITALIZED words. I am not yelling, just being dramatic.

My life has taken a turn. Henry has learned to crawl and he gets faster every day. It's so much fun but like with all other developmental wins with a baby it's exhausting for parents. Takes a while to get into the groove and then he'll be walking and we'll get used to that and so on and so on. I'm not complaining.

On top of that Hank the Tank has a tummy virus which means lots of diaper changes and wrestling matches when we change the diaper.

And in closing here is a link of my baby crawling...awww. :) Tank crawl.

Drogging

2010-05-20T12:13:00.003-04:00

Drogging (drunk blogging) makes for a stupid blog, like my last entry. Yeah, I thought I was being all profound and shit.

:)

Lots going on right now.

I have a crawling baby boy. A happy baby boy and a very handsome baby boy. Who knew that little boys were so much fun? Every day I love him so much more. He has two little bottom teeth poking out when he smiles, which is all the time. Seriously, I have a very happy baby with a good sense of humor.

We got back from St. Louis a week ago and I haven't even got to think about the trip. But I do like Saint Louis (always have) and I love my family there. The architecture is to die for, if you're into that and apparently in my family I am the only one who is. I love all the little ginger bread houses and just the thought that a modern family lives in a home that someone lived in in the 18oo's. IT.AMAZES.ME. The doors are short, the ceilings are short, stairs are steep....so different. Seriously, I love it.

Here are a couple of pictures to share of Henry and his cousin while in STL:

P.S. I have to brag: I would like to announce that I am NOW 60lbs down from when I was pregnant. I gained 20lbs when I was pregnant so that makes it 40lbs of "real" weight I've lost AND I'm back to my same jeans size and weight I was from 6 years ago when I moved to Raleigh. I am proud of myself for once.

Hippyidy dip talk

2010-05-19T22:06:00.002-04:00

Why can't we just be free to do the things we want to do, whether self destrictive or not, just to feel good, happy and numb.

Some vices are worse than others and some we just don't talk about at all, but they are there. In your classroom, neighborhood, living room.

Foods, drugs, alcohol, self gratification should be allowed. In moderation.

7 Months - what it looks like

2010-05-04T17:09:00.003-04:00

What it is and how it goes in another post. Look how much he looks like his Daddy!

See ya in Saint Louie!

2010-05-04T10:21:00.002-04:00

We're headed to Saint Louis tomorrow! I'm very excited. It's long overdue. Last time we planned a STL trip I had a bad time with Benign Paroxysmal Positional Vertigo and we had to call it off. Two years and three babies later (2 nephews and Henry!) here we come!

I have been wanting to write a blog about traveling with an infant for a long time. I just need to do it. I keep putting it off. Henry has been on 3 trips to OK, 6 if you count going and coming back, and I've learned a few things. This will be our fourth trip and most likely the most stressful as he's real squiggly right now. I'll have Alan with me though and this will help calm my nerves. Nothing stresses that man out, I'm telling ya'.

Today I'm doing the whole housewife thing, cleaning, laundry, etc. We'll go out later to pick up our traveling supplies (thank God for disposable formula bottles).

Oh, and on that note I also want to write a blog about my experiences with breastfeeding. I'm a little afraid to write it because I had such a hard time with my decision to stop so early and I want to be very respectful and supportive to all my pro-breastfeeding irl and bloggy friends. It just didn't work for us and 6 weeks was all I lasted. It was honestly the best (and the hardest) decision I ever made for Henry and I. Watch for that in the near future.

In My Room

2010-05-03T20:21:00.000-04:00

I always wonder why it is that being alone in my bedroom is something I crave.

After a long day, if I have survived and everyone is fed and has all limbs attached

Well, my aching body...it just NEEDS to be alone. Blissfully alone, freedom.

No smiles.
No frowns.
No cries.

And now, no spit up or poop.

I don't ask for a lot. I realize that NOW I am not my own. I have to share myself with my family. People NEED things from me; company, laundry, love, hugs, laughs, tickles, but mainly, most importantly, love.

I give, give, give...

and enjoy.

But sometimes I just need 15 minutes of uninterrupted time without having to scrub cat barf off the floor, fold laundry, start the dishwasher, fix the toilet, etc. (The former mentioned was my previous attempt at "alone" time).

Now I have a hubby who is hands on with our son on all days but especially hands on for Monday nights which are MY nights. Where I lock myself in my room with a snack and watch Intervention while catching up on blogs and maybe even writing.

And for an hour or two I am MYself, all by MYself, and I am content in my solitude.

Selfish

2010-04-25T22:36:00.000-04:00

This is a negative but none-fishing for compliments type blog entry in which I express my insides. Just thinking.

I do believe I am selfish

This is something I've been told time and time again.

"The world doesn't revolve around you, Andrea".

Lies.

In my head, it does.

It's not always a horrible thing. It's a folly. Part of my charm.

I don't know where or why it began. Also, being territorial comes along with the, um, well, territory of being selfish.

I really do not mean to be. I work hard hard hard at trying.

I try at a lot of things negative: selfishness, anger, temper, frustration.

I am a lot of these things wrapped into one.

(trying trying trying)

And yet I find people still love ME. It's hard to imagine that I am all of those things and yet somehow the good in me shines through and family and friends choose to like, love and want to be in my own company

I'm not bragging, just thinking.

Having a child has helped me immensely although this was never ever a fix all thought or wish by any means. We chose to have children to give after all. I love him so much.

My most selfish time of the day is evening when I cut out of living early and zone out sitting in bed reading and writing. I cherish this hour I have to myself. I crave it and depend on it and I am fiercely protective of my early bed time. I need that unwind time from pretending to NOT be selfish and angry and bitter all day.

To say I have issues is putting it lightly. Every one has issues though. Just some of us are more honest and vocal about themselves than other.

I don't beat up on myself anymore. I just choose to put it out there and work with it. It's definitely a defense mechanism. Pointing out your flaws before others point them out to you.

I just want to be me. The older I have gotten the more comfortable I am with myself in all aspects.

I just try and be realistic and most the time people don't want to hear that so I stifle my inner person or cover her up with a tiny giggle or smile or a nod of a head. It's more socially acceptable. I'm kind of reaching the point where I'm ready to break out again and just be Andrea. The girl that can be rude or abrupt but will always let you know what she thinks. All the while trying to maintain a little tact.

But I bet I'll make you smile or laugh or think along the way.

I'm Brunette

2010-04-22T21:29:00.003-04:00

A few months ago I posted on Facebook about a plastic real life sized deer that was in the backyard of one of our neighbors. Their backyard faces a busier street in the 'hood so I assumed, being the city girl that I am, that it was a surveillance camera trying to catch speeders. I drove by that house very slow and carefully thinking I was pulling one over on "the man". "Ahhhh haaa", I thought. I'm on to you sneaky Garner Police!" When I received comments on Facebook I was embarrassed to learn that it was NOT a police camera but a hunting practice prop. So apparently people target practice on this plastic animal. Surveillance camera. Right...

So yesterday when I drove by Bambi's back yard I realized that she/he had been beheaded. Yes, the head was completely gone. Tis now but a headless animal to practice hunting on. WTF? GONE. I am baffled by what happened. I may need to take pictures.

Other stupid things I have done/said?

I once saw a cool tattoo on a guys arm at the bar. I asked a friend what the hell that symbol was, to which he replied, "It's an infinity symbol". I whispered back, "why would you get a car brand tattooed on your arm? Lame.".

I once cleaned out my fridge for the first time ever. Yes, you are reading that right. First time ever. When I was done and the fridge was bare I sprinkled Arm and Hammer baking soda in the fridge like Carpet Fresh. Then I called my mother asking her why anyone would do such a thing because now my fridge was all dirty again. Apparently you just need to put the whole BOX in the fridge.

I once stole a recipe from my Mom for a jalapeno corn casserole to take to my works Thanksgiving dinner. Well, she just TOLD me the recipe, nothing in writing. So the next day at work she asked me how the casserole went and how long I baked it. "Baked it?" Yeah. Didn't bake it. No one complained though.

There are lots of other stupid things I have done/said. I'm really not dumb, I swear.

The AC did done broke.

2010-04-08T11:58:00.005-04:00

Today I am spring cleaning. Or whatever, just cleaning.

A lot of Henry's clothes that he's outgrown and have sentimental value are boxed and ready to go in the attic. The closet is clean and I think we're ready to start hanging his clothes instead of folding. In my mind hanging is easier than folding.

Our AC is broke right now and if this sounds like a rerun it's because it is. Last year it was "breaking" the whole spring/summer and now it is BROKE. I'll spare you the details but I threw a shit fit when we came home on Monday evening to an 85 degree house (94 outside). I think the insulation in our house SUCKS. Even with the windows open it only cooled down to 79 last night in the living room. So, after I through the shit fit I promptly went to Target to get a window unit and that's kept us cool for the last 3 days for the most part. I'm thankful that we're supposed to return to normal temps and it shouldn't be so bad the next week. Anyway, Friday the AC people are coming out to evaluate the situation and Wednesday is the installation day. There goes our tax refund and more! :) What can ya do, right?

That's what's going on at our house, what's going on at yours?