By the way, I don’t think I was posting back then, so here’s a recap of my amazing 30th birthday:
September 19th. New girlfriend almost made me cry with extremely thoughtful and/or handmade gifts. Out to bar and then a different bar with friends and coworkers and new girlfriend. Got really drunk, for really cheap. A bunch of separate friends were meeting for the first time, and everyone loved each other. Saw some boobs (tits, breasts) that I didn’t expect to. Sucked on some other boob that I didn’t expect to. Brought the party home. Tried to invite some creepy crack-dealing type back with us, but friends didn’t let me. Kept drinking, didn’t need to. Passed the fuck out. Great.
September 20th. Woke up to awesome blowjob. Walked to restaurant for breakfast with girlfriend. Puked violently in bathroom while waiting for food. Went home to take a nap. Got up and drove to somewhere I can’t remember with girlfriend. Stopped home to roll two massive joints. Drove downtown to eat dinner at Quizno’s. Walked across the street to watch The Flaming Lips climb out of a giant psychedelic vagina and start shredding Sweet Leaf by Black Sabbath. Rest of show was too cool to describe. Show was over, walked outside to find Keller Fountain had been bubble-flooded and was now swarming with hippies and happy weirdos. (There’s video footage at the link I just dropped, you should check it out.) Shared joints with hippies, went home, made sweet love, and passed the fuck out.

This is the Keller Fountain, one of my favorite places in the world.

Anyway. Being 30. How weird. I guess I’m having trouble with the whole… being-a-fucking-loser thing? Those are harsh words, but I sometimes feel like that’s how the world views people like me. 30 years old, shitty part-time job, no serious goals, broke most of the time, et cetera. I mean, I’m doing better than the guy who’s still living in his mom’s basement… but not by much. And if my mom wasn’t dead, who knows where I’d be living.

I have been in a rut lately, which is part of the reason why I stopped making excuses and started writing this ridiculous blog again. And I am doing a couple of other things, too. I mean. I have a couple of tricks up my sleeve. I always do. This post isn’t meant to be all doom and despair AT ALL. I’m just…. venting. Shit is weird when you turn 30. That’s all for now.

Looking for a cool video to post, something that might inspire some words, but…. I got nothing.

All I’m thinking about is this beer I’m drinking. And Rick Santorum.

That guy is fucking scary. I’m really hoping he doesn’t actually have even the slightest chance of running this already-fucked country. He REALLY BELIEVES in Satan. As in, SATAN isn’t just a mythical creature used as a tool of control by some religious sects, but… he (Satan) is an actual real thing that is running around trying to make everything turn to evil.

It makes me sad that anyone with a brain in modern society can’t understand the parallels between something like Satan/Jesus/Whateva and the “Mythology” of the Greeks and Romans and stuff. I mean. (Beyond the fact that the story of Christ can be found in folklore that waaaaaaaay predates the time when Jesus was supposed to have been around…) Really, Rick?

Seriously, though. As if people need a little red dude with a pitchfork to trick them into sucking and fucking, or smoking crack, or believing in evolution?

It just makes me sad that this guy is ahead in some of the early polls. I can’t fathom how anybody living in this time and place could POSSIBLY find any reality in what this dude is saying. I worry that he will win the primary, and somehow end up stealing the election in November.

Not that Obama is any better. Personally, I think that guy is a fuckhead, too. Even Ron Paul, my idea of “the lesser of two evils,” probably has no chance whatsoever.

Other than that, my coworker’s girlfriend got him a home-brew kit for Christmas. And I am enjoying a brown ale from his inaugural batch. Quite delicious. Making me think about how much fun it would be to start making ridiculously yummy microbrews at home. Even though my fat belly would not approve.

Anyway. Yeah. Here’s that weird video I was looking for.