The Tao of Po

I NEED MOTIVATION! So I ordered a magazine

2014-07-30T05:00:00.000-05:00

I subscribed today to Runner's World, a magazine I gave up on several years ago because they kept publishing the same stories and giving the same advice over and over and over.... Really, how much is there to say about running? You either do it or not. There is no Nickel Defense or Triangle Offense. There is no right or wrong club, and there are no pawns and bishops.

Uhhh... another reason to subscribe?

You put one foot in front of the other. Repeat.

Why the change of heart? Two reasons:

1. As I continue to, er, train for the Portland Marathon, I find my motivation ebbing and procrastination flowing. I'm doing this one alone: no training partners, no friends nor running clubs... sheesh, even my wife will not join me. So while I should have already run 12 miles for my long run, I find that I've not gone further than 8 miles, which I did several weeks ago. I need focus. I need direction.

Reading the articles, features, advice, etc., puts me in a running frame of mind. Strangely, I find the prose and photos of running motivating. I guess it is kind of like watching golf or tennis on television: when I see it, I want to play it.

2. Go figure, there's some new stuff here. New in the sense that a seasoned runner will learn more about new studies and methods on running performance. There are recipes for those who want low fat or high energy meals to boost their training.

I first picked up Runner's World years ago to help walk me through the process of training for a marathon. When I pretty much got that part down (and presently ignoring all that I learned), the magazine - or any others like it - were of no use.

Alas, the publishers at Runner's World know that there are people like me who do not care to qualify for the Olympics and who have already run a marathon or two.

So the magazine now reveals to me ways to understand and treat the many injuries my older body suffers, how to eat better, and tips on training and equipment.

So you see, this damn rag has inspired me once again. Hopefully it will help me figure out a way to cram for my marathon training for a race that is merely 2 months away. (Runner's World, by the way, would most likely tell me not do this).

The Doctors: What's your BMI, and why should you care?

2014-07-27T12:19:00.000-05:00

I have always disregarded Body Mass Index (BMI) as a false, superficial metric. Take my current BMI for example: According to the Centers for Disease Control, I am overweight.

I wouldn't say I look like a triathlete, but I certainly am not fat. And surely there is a difference between what is "fat" and what is "overweight." The CDC explains why BMI is used and how it is calculated, but they don't really explain why this particular metric is an indicator of obesity.

An article from today's USA Today attempts to explain (The Doctors: What's your BMI, and why should you care?). Fortunately, this article admits that the BMI does not take into account age, muscle, and other body dimensions.

Me, in the eyes of the federal government

Still, I'm unsatisfied. I say, BMI... WTF?!

I run, eat fairly healthy, moderate my intake of toxins and other putrefaction, but still the CDC will call me a fatso. And the BMI they recommend for someone of my height is a weight I haven't hefted since early high school.

Maybe that's the point. Maybe the CDC is trying to convey in their motherly kind of way that we are a nation of fatsos. Instead of directly shattering our self image, the BMI is the federal government's way of saying, "Why can't you be more like your friend Adonis? You know, the one who respects his mother."

So, despite my disdain for artificial measurements of health and wellness, I will attempt to lower my BMI. Can I lose 13 pounds - because I am not going one pound lower than 184 (a weight I haven't seen since I was a lanky high school sophomore)?

Portlandia has now become part of my #marathontraining regime

2014-07-25T06:21:00.000-05:00

Jaded, bored... alive!

To fully prepare for the Portland Marathon, I have introduced a program of steady Portlandia viewing. Like any new training regimen, I begin at the beginning with season 1.

It is not yet clear to me how this show will improve my marathon performance, but already I feel more sensitive and in touch with the world around me - at least until I am not, which will probably be about 10:30a this morning.

One thing is for sure, The Dream of the 90s is Alive in Portland has become my new favorite running tune.

Oregon to Vote on Pot Legalization - impact on #portlandmarathon?

2014-07-23T06:00:00.001-05:00

Post-race snack, or whatever, dude.

Oregonians will go to the polls this November to decide yet again whether to legalize the recreational use of marijuana - which means that by Portland Marathon race day exactly one month before election day, Portland will have reached a fever pitch - or mellow contentedness - of political frenzy - or sleepy indifference.

Curious to know that if the race will now become a "Run to the Border" and if post-race snacks will consist of pizza and Taco Bell handed out by jaded college students.

Back at it, in a manner of speaking (#portlandmarathon)

2014-07-22T06:46:00.000-05:00

Greetings! It has been a solid year since my last post. Admit it, you noticed.

So my plan is to run the Portland Marathon in October 2014. This will be race #9 of my "10 Marathons to run before I die" list (assuming none of the 9 kill me before 10).

To recap:

Marine Corps (didn't die)
New York City (survived)
Mayor's Midnight Sun, Anchorage, AK (made it)
Governor's Cup, Helena, MT (not dead yet)
Atlanta (beat a 70+ yo barefooted man running in blue jeans... barely)
Chicago (nipples died, I survived)
Houston (feet died, I survived)
Rouge Orleans Ultra Relay (in which our hero ate king cake and drank beer on a 126.2 mile journey from Baton Rouge to New Orleans... and did not perish)
Portland, I am hoping
Boston through the fundraising back door because I have no desire to actually qualify, or Antarctica, which is really expensive and sometimes unreliable. Could you imagine not making it to shore and running 26.2 miles around the deck of a ship? I would commit acts of piracy and mutiny and other scurrilous seagoing offenses.

I chose Portland for two reasons only:

A. I never run the same race twice - not being snooty. Running is such a mind game that I can't allow boring terrain mess with my head,

B. I have never been to Oregon. Shallow as it may seem, my other buck list besides marathons is to visit all 50 states. I have 9 to go (OR, NE, SD, ND, WI, IN, KY, IA & DE -- Delaware? How do you get to Delaware. Its like on the beaten path of nowhere). Oregon makes it 8.

Turns out that Portland is a great course with hills (I actually like hills) in perfect running weather conditions (cool, possibly cloudy), and the city is one of the hippest places in the US of A. Everybody wins!

Anyway, I have begun training. I should be up to mile 10 but have only completed mile 8 for the long run.

Will keep you posted. Literally. This is a blog.

4 Ways to Thrive When Running in Hot Weather

2013-07-31T08:21:00.001-05:00

As a summertime running masochist, I offered brilliant commentary on this good article.

"How to Lose Weight While Training For a Marathon"

2013-07-20T08:16:00.000-05:00

Does this neckerchief make me look fat?

Seems obvious that weight loss would be a natural effect from marathon training. Apparently not. This article was eye opening if just for this revelation.

Very helpful are the calorie calculators.

I long subscribed to the "eat whatever you want" theory... until I turned 40. Never a calorie counter either, I got frustrated being told by my internist that I was technically overweight (6', 210 lbs) b/c my BMI suggested that I should be 190 lbs. I weighed that in college, and I have always been slim-ish. Started counting calories for awareness and then as a new challenge. Damn it is hard to shed the rest of the pounds. Strosaker's article helps make sense of the effort and gives me a better strategy. Thanks for the read. Now where're my Twinkies?

Top 3 songs on 3 mile run

2013-07-06T17:35:00.001-05:00

"Rise" by PiL was good. "Thunder Road" by Springsteen was accidentally added to playlist but was surprisingly inspirational. But the Top Three of 3 was:

1. "Dyslexic Heart" by Paul Westerberg. It's as bouncy as a TV commercial. How can you not enjoy it? It makes me want to buy soap or Hot Pockets.

2. "Arlandria" by the Foo Fighters. Having just been released from my own bondage in the Alexandria, VA area, this was my anger power song.

3. "Eminence Front" by The Who. I was hazed to this song in college. How can I like it so much?

Today's run was finally a good one after so many crappy days. Was it the music? Was it the 3 mile bike ride earlier today?

A friend and occasional running partner is helping to inaugurate the first ever marathon in Lafayette, La, called the Zydeco Marathon. It is in March 2014. Lafayette is one of the funnest towns in the U.S. of A. It is the Cajun Capital of Acadiana. But damnit if the race isn't a double loop. I hate covering the same ground twice.

Long runs are mental games, right? Boring terrain, or the same terrain make me think too much about the actual running, pain, cramps, chafing, and other embarrassing afflictions.

I mean, do you care if you run the same place twice? Or what can you do to win the mental game on a double loop?

Top 3 Songs of my 3 mile run

2013-06-06T22:05:00.000-05:00

In order:

1. "Outta My System" by My Morning Jacket (motivation comes from strange places)

2. "Holdin On To Black Metal" another by My Morning Jacket

3. "That's Not My Name" by the Ting Tings. Yeah, the Ting Tings. I became a fan while watching mind numbing stretches of Nick, Jr. at 2 a.m.

More than 10,000 Served!

2012-10-28T08:17:00.000-05:00

October 2012 marks the occasion when more than 10,000 readers have viewed the Tao of Po since the blog's inception one year ago in October 2011. Most sites get 10,000 hits a day. Indeed, most junkies get more hits a day, but our humble little blog is pleased that there are those of you who have taken time in your day for a little Zen.

Go on ya, Dragon Warriors you. Go on ya.

Thank you!

You never know, underneath all that fat and fur is a Dragon Warrior

2012-10-17T15:04:00.000-05:00

The ancient Masters were profound and subtle.

Their wisdom was unfathomable.
There is no way to describe it;
all we can describe is their appearance.

They were careful
as someone crossing an iced-covered stream.
Alert as a warrior in enemy territory.
Courteous as a guest.
Fluid as melting ice.
Shapeable as a block of wood.
Receptive as a valley.
Clear as a glass of water.

Do you have the patience to wait
till your mud settles and the water is clear?
Can you remain unmoving
till the right action arises by itself;

The Master doesn’t seek fulfillment.
Not seeking, not expecting,
she is present, and can welcome all things.

Tao Te Ching, Chapter 15
Translation by Stephen Mitchell

The translator’s Zen Master Seung Sahn elaborates on this piece by further stating, “Our mind is like a glass of water. If we put salt into the water it becomes salt water; sugar, it becomes sugar water; shit, it becomes shit water. But originally the water is clear. No thinking, no mind. No mind, no problem.”

Lao-tse’s Chapter 15 applies more broadly than this, but I say resist the influences of others to shape your beliefs and values. And don’t let others define who you are.

And don’t be afraid to explore – your whole life – your identity and capabilities. You won’t know you can fight until you throw a punch… or take a punch.

Others may think they know who you are – until you prove them differently.

You may think you know who you are, until you test and stretch your limits.

You never know, underneath all that fat and fur is a Dragon Warrior.

Another of life’s Big Things is discovering who you are

2012-10-13T15:02:00.000-05:00

The problem with many people is that they are subjected to external stimuli such as this and accept it, even assimilate it. Individuals with strong personalities are usually pretty good about establishing their own identities, but others, like me, have to work hard for.

Somewhere underneath it all is you, your brain and your heart. God and DNA ensure that humans and snowflakes are individually unique. Most of us can think for ourselves and those of us with a conscience feel emotions and embrace beliefs based on how we feel and what we think.

Despondent, Po sought refuge at the Peach Tree of Heavenly Wisdom where he gorged himself on fruit to help sooth his pain. He was approached by the wise Master Oogway.

“I pretty much sucked today more than anyone in the history of Kung Fu. In the history of China! In the history of sucking!” said Po.

“Probably,” replied Oogway.

“The [Furious] Five! You should’ve seen them. They totally hate me!” said Po.

“Totally,” said Oogway.

“How’s Shifu going to turn me into the Dragon Warrior?” said Po. “I’m not like the Five. I’ve got no claws. No wings. No venom. Even Mantis has those… thingies. (sigh). Maybe I should just quit and go back to making noodles.”

“Quit. Don’t quit. Noodles. Don’t noodles,” said Oogway. You are too concerned about what’s what and what will be. There is a saying, ‘Yesterday’s history. Tomorrow’s a mystery. But today is a gift. That’s why it is called the present.”

Quit. Don't Quit. Noodles. Don't Noodles

Another of life’s Big Things is discovering who you are.

I will turn you into the Dragon Warrior, or somesuch

2012-10-10T15:00:00.000-05:00

At his weakest moment, when Po had given up on himself, he tried desperately to escape. He was convinced he could never be the Dragon Warrior and that he could not face arch villain Tai Lung. He was intercepted by his teacher, Master Shifu.

“C’mon! How am I supposed to beat Tai Lung? I can’t even beat you to the stairs” shouts Po.”

You will beat him because you are the Dragon Warrior,” says Shifu.

I will make you the Dragon Warrior

“You don’t believe that,” cries Po. “You never believed that. From the first moment I got here, you’ve been trying to get rid of me.”

“Yes, I was… Yes! But now I ask you to trust in your master the way I have come to trust in mine,” replies Shifu.

“You’re not my master, and I’m not the Dragon Warrior,” says Po.

“Then why didn’t you quit?” shouts Shifu. ” You know I was trying to get rid of you, yet you stayed!”

“Yeah, I stayed,” said Po. “I stayed because every time you threw a brick at my head or said I smelled, it hurt, but it could never hurt more than it did every day of my life just being me.

“I stayed because I thought that if anyone could change me… could make me… not me… it was you: the greatest Kung Fu teacher in all of China.”

Here Po admits that he too was trying to become something he is not. Just like Shifu was trying to make him into something he is not.

“But I can change you!” pleaded Shifu. “I can turn you into the Dragon Warrior! And I will!”

Po laughs, “Come on. Tai Lung is on his way here right now. And even if it takes him 100 years to get here, how are you going to change this [his fat body] into the Dragon Warrior? Huh? How? How? How!”

Shifu pauses introspectively, realizing Po is right, “I don’t know. I don’t know.”

“That’s what I thought,” said Po.

More Taoist Po-etry

2012-10-06T14:56:00.000-05:00

We all have a place in the world...

Po’s duck dad believes Po’s destiny is to take over the noodle stand one day. He says to Po, “We are noodle folk. Broth runs through our veins.” It is clear to his father who Po is and what his life’s calling will be.

Po asks his father if he ever had dreams and aspirations. His father replies that he once had a dream of running away from the family noodle business to make tofu; a dream he abandoned in his youth. Sighing, he says to Po, “We all have a place in the world, and yours is table 2, 5, 7 and 12.”

Despite his dreams to the contrary, Po’s destiny and identity are being shaped by that most influential person: the parent.

Part of discovering the Big Thing is understanding what’s important to you in life and striving to be contented. Part of pursuing the Big Thing is striving for purpose, meaning and fulfillment in life.

The foundation of it all is knowing who you are and establishing your identity. This is really, really hard. For some it comes easy, for others it is unattainable. For me, it was a struggle that ended only after years of severe depression.

I hate to quote Whitney Houston (and believe me, I really do hate to quote Whitney Houston), but she really said something in her song “Greatest Love of All” when she belted out,

I found the greatest love of all
Inside of me
The greatest love of all
Is easy to achieve
Learning to love yourself
It is the greatest love of all

All human identity emerges from our genetics. You have heard the phrase “nurture and nature,” meaning some influences in human development are based on external factors while others are come from our DNA.

We are who we are because of the DNA bequeathed to us by our parents (thanks for the double chin!) and the external forces and environment that influence our behavior, values and beliefs.

Every day there is a competition around us by others who tell us how to think and feel, what to believe, what to do, and who to be. Yes, who to be.

People often influence what you are and what you become because of their opinions of your abilities and powers. Such people are influential over us because we empower their opinions – right or wrong – by accepting them and allowing ourselves to be shaped by them. You say I am handsome, I will quickly believe it. You say I am a toad, and alas, eventually I will own it.

For Po, he was predestined to be a noodle vendor, not because he wanted but because to his father it was so. And he accepted.

Po’s teacher and heroes dismissed him as a joke, questioning his abilities, let alone his place on earth. And he accepted it.

The Po-etry of the Tao of Po

2012-10-03T14:54:00.000-05:00

Legend tells of a legendary warrior whose Kung Fu skills were the stuff of legend, begins Po’s early morning fantasy in which he imagines himself the fearless warrior defending peaceable furry little Chinese creatures against the banditry and ne’er do wellington of bad guys throughout the countryside.

Po slays his enemies by the thousands. His admirers swoon and cheer gratefully with each victory.

They shout, “He’s so awesome!”

“… and attractive.”

“How can we repay you?”

“There is no charge for awesomeness or attractiveness,” is his modest reply.

Po is a dreamer. He lives in a King Fu fantasy world where he is the awesome, attractive hero of all China. To say that Kung Fu is his passion is an understatement. It is his religion, his life, and his being.

Po is like a little boy who loves professional football and idolizes the greatest players. In this image the little boy sleeps with his football and wears a helmet to breakfast. He dreams of one day becoming a great football player himself. Except in this case, Po is a grown Panda/man.

Po shares this similar longing for Kung Fu and he idolizes his Kung Fu heroes, the Furious Five, the greatest warriors in China.

But Po is a big, fat panda. He is a glutton and an oaf. He serves noodles in his father’s restaurant, who is, by the way, a duck. Po is clearly, in his estimation and in others’, no Kung Fu hero.

Yet, Po’s longing for Kung Fu greatness will manifest soon in harsh brutality when he will be chosen as the legendary Dragon Warrior by the great martial arts teacher Master Oogway. The prospect of this lifelong honor juxtaposed against the pressures of being himself are often times too much for him to bear. It tears at his heart.

To say that Po is experiencing an identity crisis is an understatement. And it is exacerbated as he struggles to reconcile who he is, who is father thinks he is, what others think of him, and what he must become to fulfill the role of Dragon Warrior.

a little dose of Tao

2012-09-30T14:52:00.001-05:00

Knowing others is intelligence;
knowing yourself is true wisdom.
Mastering others is strength;
mastering yourself is true power.

If you realize that you have enough,

you are truly rich.
If you stay in the center
and embrace death with your whole heart,
you will endure forever.

Tao Te Ching, Chapter 33
Translation by Stephen Mitchell

For the rest of 2012, Oppan Gangnam Style will be the theme song to all of my training runs

2012-09-27T15:10:00.000-05:00

Oppan Gangnam Style is how I roll. At least for the time being.

This is what we mean when we talk Tao of Po

2012-09-15T06:00:00.000-05:00

Kung Fu Panda is one of my favorite movies of all time. The story amounts to a modern day CGI animated version of the Vinegar Tasters as it contrasts the essential differences between Confucianism and Taoism at the expense of Confucianism. I haven’t identified any Buddhism over- or undertones, so we’ll only discuss the difference between the portrayals of Confucianism and Taoism.

“Whaaaaa?!?!” say those who have seen the movie. There is absolutely no story line about Confucianism, Taoism, Poohism or any kind of -ism.

Ahh, but alas. Kung Fu Panda is distinctly a story of the dichotomy of Confucianism and Taoism, and is indeed very much like the Vinegar Tasters.

Kung Fu Panda is the story of Po: a fat, clumsy panda bear who is something of an anti-hero. Po is the farthest thing from a Kung Fu hero, yet he is probably the biggest devotee of Kung Fu in, as he says, “the history of Kung Fu.” Yet, the very wise – and very Taoist – Kung Fu Master Oogway declares unexpectedly that Po is the Dragon Warrior: the legendary Kung Fu warrior Messiah who will preserve peace in their home valley.

Everyone is nonplussed, including Po, and especially his new Kung Fu teacher Master Shifu, the protégé of Oogway who represents that most strident and disciplined of Confucian martial artists.

Realizing he is the most unlikely candidate for Dragon Warrior, Po nonetheless accepts the role and trains to become the legend, in a manner not unlike my 4 year old son training for the Super Bowl. He accepts himself for what he is – a fat, clumsy panda – but struggles to convert his natural state into the acutely honed fighting machine of Kung Fu master.

Po, at this point in the story, is a reluctant kind of Taoist. He realizes that he is who he is, and that he is unlikely to change. Before he was declared the Dragon Warrior he was less concerned about his condition, abilities and intellect and more or less accepted who he was out of default. More like, “this is as good as it gets.” Still he yearns to enter the realm of Kung Fu master.

Master Shifu, having trained China’s greatest warriors through years of rigorous, repetitive, physical, intense training embodies all the principles of Confucianism. Harmony, or the mastery of Kung Fu, in his world requires rules and order. It is a practice that has been quite successful in his life, and he is considered the best Kung Fu teacher in all China. Oogway has assigned Shifu the task of molding Po into the Dragon Warrior. Predictably, Shifu takes the lumpy clay that is Po and attempts to mold him in the way he knows best.

Therefore, a clash emerges when the irresistible force of Shifu’s Confucian methods meet the immovable (literally) object of Po’s talentless, gelatinous girth (his Taoist, natural state).

But the real struggle is not between the Po the pupil and Shifu the master. It is actually between the pure Taoism of Master Oogway and the essential Confucianism of his protégé pupil Master Shifu. Oogway compels the resistant Shifu to accept Po for what he is and allow him to blossom into the Dragon Warrior, a notion that defies everything Shifu knows about Kung Fu.

In this clash we see the modern day portrayal of the Vinegar Tasters (minus the Buddha). In this conceit, it is Shifu who reacts bitterly upon tasting the vinegar. He is Confucius. Oogway is Lao-tse, smiling sweetly because the vinegar – or as the painting suggests, the Essence of Life – is being what it is supposed to be. Vinegar is bitter and the Taoist Oogway recognizes it as such, so he smiles pleasantly.

The Essence of Life is Po.

I am not attempting here to oversimplify spiritual creeds and practices of three great philosophies in a few mere brilliantly pithy sentences, but to describe the painting that is allegorical to the movie Kung Fu Panda, which is allegorical to the theme of this blog– the Marathon and Big Thing – which is allegorical to life.

I am also not trying to convert anyone to Taoism. I’m not even a Taoist, but the philosophy is not without merit and there is much we all can learn from it. In fact, throughout this blog, I will cite Kung Fu Panda when the basic tenets of Taoism (or Poohism, or in this case Po'ism) expressed in Po’s story relate directly to the Big Thing.

Indeed.

A second lesson in Taoism from someone who does not practice Taoism

2012-09-12T21:10:00.000-05:00

A quick illustration of Taoism is presented in an explanation of the painting The Vinegar Tasters, which is also described in the landmark Benjamin Hoff book on Taoism, The Tao of Pooh. (Curious title. Can't see how Hoff got it to work.) You should check them out. I'll wait.

There is a religious Taoism, but that is not what I am describing. The Tao I describe is a philosophy, a way of life. Like stoicism or epicureanism, the philosophic Taoism is a way of understanding our universe and living in it. In fact, it has been said that Jimmy Buffet is not a singer but a way of life. If anything exemplifies Taoism better than Margaritaville, I don't know what it is. Then again, I don't get out much. Well, except to train for marathons.

In any case, if the concept of Taoism upsets your religious sensibilities, relax. I'm not trying to convert you. Hell, I'm not even a Taoist myself. I am a Christian, but I do subscribe to some of the basic tenets of the Tao, which by the way, can be found -- if you think about it -- in Christianity and other faiths.

But I digress. This blog is about running a marathon. I have a way to go before I convince you of this. And by way, I mean Tao. A segue, perhaps?

The Tao in Tao of Po - a quick guide to understanding my dilettante-ism

2012-09-09T06:00:00.000-05:00

So this site uses Kung Fu Panda as a fable for understanding greatness, achievement, etc. blah, blah. To do this we reveal the secret of the panda's success by describing it in terms of the principals of Taoism.

Damn right I used this awesome 1970s poster to make a point.

Hang with me while I depart momentarily from running and exercise and other frivolity to explain how I abuse the tenets of Taoism to conform to my literary conceit.

The Tao (pronounced "DOW") can be easily described -- if one can actually do such with enduring religions and philosophies in few mere paragraphs -- as the natural flow, rhythm and properties of the universe. Literally translated as "the way" or "the path," the Tao is the force behind the natural order of things that helps keep the universe in balance.

It can also be understood through the Taoist concept of wu wei, which literally means "without action," and commonly paraphrased as "action without action." In other words, the Taoist accepts the world as it is, understanding that there is natural energy and dynamism to everything. By appreciating the natural order and energy of the universe, the Taoist is empowered by it -- the Tao -- but equally important, the Taoist achieves peace. At least that's what's on the pamphlet.

I'm sorry to do this to you, but probably the most well known Western version of the Tao is the Force from Star Wars.

Taoism purists will hate me for drawing such comparisons, but they should know better than to hate. Haters.

The hydration anecdote you've always waited for

2012-09-07T06:00:00.000-05:00

On the other hand, Ronald Regan hydrated sufficiently

When I ran the Marine Corps Marathon – my first marathon – I trained with a good buddy who was a better runner than me and more physically fit. We started the race together but he quickly outpaced me and vanished from my sight by mile 5. As I struggled through the pack on a very hot, cloudless 75 degree October day (75 degrees is scorching when running a marathon), I lumbered toward the finish line in 4:00 + hours.

Wrapped in Mylar, proudly sporting a finisher’s medal, and inhaling whatever food I could find, I wandered around our rendezvous point to meet my friend who was certainly already there. Time passed slowly, and with my friend nowhere to be found after and hour and a half, I walked two painful miles to my car and waited another 2 hours then went home and waited longer still until he phoned me from his hospital bed in Fairfax Virginia where he was recuperating from dehydration and kidney failure. He remained in the hospital for three days! He was fed intravenously, and it took him nearly 48 hours to get enough juice just to go to the bathroom.

Later he told me that he was so determined to finish in less than 4 hours that he bypassed all water stations and pushed himself as hard as he could. And he very nearly achieved his goal when 15 yards from the finish line he collapsed. God Bless the United States Marines. They honorably carried him across the finish line so he could claim victory, and they kept right on hauling him until he lay motionless in an ambulance bound for the hospital.

Many of us have suffered the smaller, inconvenient effects of dehydration: muscle spasms and cramps, lethargic runs, constipation, and fatigue. But please remember how neglecting something as simple as drinking water can lead to ruin.

As the Wiggles say, “Gulp. Gulp. Drink some water. It’s so good for you.”

3 miles, carbohydrates and The Replacements

2012-09-05T22:42:00.003-05:00

Ran another 3 miles tonight. On the one hand I am glad I am exercising. On the other hand, this repetitive 3 mile cycle is probably not helping at all. I need to resume tempo runs and long runs.

My lovely wife made a huge pasta dinner the other night, which means that I have gorged on noodles for a few days because no one in my family eats leftovers except me. My wife calls me the garbage man (I think endearingly).

So during the whole discussion about nutrition and carbohydrate consumption we learned that,

A. You need carbohydrates to give you the energy necessary to train and exercise well, and

B. It is really good to consume carbohydrates after a workout because your body will have depleted stores of glycogen and will crave the stuff.

So what's bumming me out about the repetitive 3-mile runs is that I have stabilized carbohydrate consumption, meaning that I am probably not burning enough carbohydrates and fat because I keep replenishing carbohydrates after evening runs.

In fact, I'm probably getting a little tubby because my zeal for pasta is dramatically more passionate than my yin for exercise.

Therefore, I need to tip the scales by burning glycogen stores and fats by running for more than 45 minutes or by intense exercise through tempo runs.

Sure, I could cut back on the pasta, but whoever is going to force that on me can go to hell. Because life on earth without linguine and clam sauce is indeed Dante's Inferno.

Finally, as per the usual, I was blessed (or haunted) by a single song this evening. Now I will afflict you with it.

Hyponatremia - like the Bizarro Super Man of Hydration. Or some crazy crap like that

2012-09-05T06:00:00.000-05:00

Moderation, jackass

Now that you know all there is to know about proper hydration, and the harmful effects of dehydration, allow me to throw at you physiology’s curve ball: HYPONATREMIA.

Hyponatremia is the complete, total opposite of dehydration. It is the infrared to dehydration’s ultraviolet. The right to its left. The Superman to the Bizarro Superman.

Hyponatremia is when you saturate your body with water while losing sodium in the blood. In other words, is a good ole fashioned water logging.

It happens when you sweat and replace fluids with water and do not replace sodium. Hyponatremia causes fatigue, weakness, cramping nausea, vomiting, bloating, dizziness, headache – and death! Yes, death!

Because its symptoms are actually similar to dehydration, it used to be misdiagnosed. And for the runner who does not regularly jog with a physician, mistaking it for dehydration can be exacerbated by innocently consuming more water.

Hyponatremia occurs most often in hot, humid, long races, especially to runners running longer than 4 or more hours, though it can happen in short races too.

What do you do?

Stick to sports drinks after 1 hour of running
Don’t drink more than you sweat – so limit drinks to 1 to 2 cups per water station.
Be sure to consume sodium – sports drinks -- late in the race. Since sports drinks are mostly water, there is little threat of getting dehydrated.

Another of my friends trained for and ran in her first Marine Corps Marathon, almost 10 years after my buddy and I ran our first. Like most new runners, she was warned of the possible threat of dehydration. Accordingly, she consumed buckets of water before and during the race. There was no “after” because she was hospitalized and nearly died from Hyponatremia. In fact, just re-read the anecdote above about by friend who suffered from dehydration, and substitute that word with Hyponatremia. The stories are virtually the same except while he drank too little water, she drank too much.

Po's Hydration Rules of Thumb While Racing

2012-09-03T06:00:00.000-05:00

è If you see a water station. STOP. USE IT.

è Drink 1 to 2 cups of water each station.

è At 10 miles and more, drink BOTH water and sports drinks.

è If a brother offers you his bagel bite, eat it.

è If a sister shares with you her orange wedge, bite it.

Great new article from Active.com about the calorie burning/weight loss effects of tempo runs and sprints

2012-09-01T08:52:00.000-05:00

Check out said article hither. Or read the cut and paste job thither.

How to Burn More Calories on Your Run

Liz Plosser • Women's Health

Most people operate under the assumption that the more they run, the more weight they'll lose. That's true, but only to a point. Running is an incredibly effective and efficient form of exercise for burning calories. (You burn about 8.5 calories a minute when moving at a comfortable pace.)
Problem is, the more miles you log, the more efficient your body becomes at running and the fewer calories it burns, says Wayne Westcott, Ph.D., fitness research director at Quincy College in Massachusetts.
In other words, you'll initially drop some pounds, but your progress will flatline as soon as your body adjusts to your exercise regimen. Plus, running long distances on a regular basis takes a physical toll (in the form of injuries, like runner's knee) and can seriously dampen your enthusiasm. Ultimately, all that pain and boredom can cause many people to burn out and give up.
Thankfully, there is a better (and easier) way. By learning how to make your runs more efficient at burning fat (by running with more intensity and by making your body stronger), you can get more benefits in less time, says Andrew Kastor, a running coach in Mammoth Lakes, California.
You'll still need to run three to five days a week (depending on which of the two programs you decide to follow), but rarely for more than 20 minutes a pop. That's not so bad, right?

Sneak in Some Speed

If you work out, you've probably heard of intervals—short bursts of intense exercise with periods of recovery in between. Here's why they work: When you chug along at a comfortable pace (as most people do), your body gets energy easily from the oxygen you inhale. But once you switch into high gear, your muscles start working harder to process that O2, so they expend extra energy recruiting other chemicals in the body (adenosine-triphosphate and phosphocreatine, in case you're interested) to get the job done.
"Your body likes to be on cruise control, because that's where it's most gas efficient," explains Westcott. "But when you push on the gas pedal, as you do in intervals, your body becomes less efficient and has to burn more calories to do the activity."
And these quick-but-killer efforts may be the closest thing you'll find to a magic calorie-burning bullet. You not only log less sweat time (which is kinder to your body) but also continue to incinerate calories at an increased rate even during the walking or jogging recovery periods, says Westcott.
The body-slimming benefits of intervals don't end there. Your metabolism logs serious OT after your run too. In a study in Medicine & Science in Sports & Exercise, women who ran hard for two minutes followed by three minutes at a low intensity torched more calories in the 24 hours following their sweat sessions than those who did slow, steady mileage.
They also lost 4 percent of their body fat in the weeks that followed, while the continuous-pace group didn't lose any. That might not sound like a huge number, but "it's enough to see a noticeable change in the mirror," says lead study author Craig Broeder, Ph.D., an exercise consultant in Naperville, Illinois.
Intervals come in a variety of sizes, and you can count on the fat-melting effects no matter how long an interval you do. "It's best to mix and match short, medium, and long intervals to keep your body guessing," says Westcott.Devote one day a week to one of the calorie-crushing regimens below, says Kastor. Warm up and cool down with five to 10 minutes of slow jogging or fast walking. For the most slimming results, switch up your workout—don't just stick with the interval routine that feels easiest.

Quickies

Find a flat section of road, or hit the track or treadmill, and speed up to a hard but sustainable effort (really huffing and puffing) for 15 seconds. Jog or walk to recover for 60 seconds. Repeat six times.
Beginner: Build up to 10 intervals over eight weeks.
Seasoned runner: Build up to 12.

Short Repeats

Find a flat section of road, or hit the track or treadmill, and speed up to a hard but sustainable effort for 30 seconds. Jog or walk to recover for 60 seconds. Repeat four times.
Beginner: Build up to 10 intervals over eight weeks.
Seasoned runner: Build up to 12.

Long Repeats

Beginner: Run a quarter of a mile (equal to one loop of a track) on flat or rolling terrain at a hard but sustainable effort, and recover by jogging or walking for two minutes. Repeat four times, building up to eight.
Seasoned runner: Change the distance to half a mile (two loops of a track).

Toned and Tranquil

To mellow out, you may want to lace up your running sneaks. According to research in the British Journal of Sports Medicine, running—and other forms of endurance exercise, including cycling—ups the concentration of calming compounds called endocannabinoids in your brain, inducing that blissful postexercise calm. And the reverse is true too: A mellow mind can lead to a fitter body. "When you're stressed, your muscles are more tense. Because they're working to hold that tension, they're less able to do their job in terms of your workout," says Jason Karp, Ph.D., a spokesperson for the American Council on Exercise. "If your mind is calm—but alert enough to focus—you'll get more out of your routine."

Head for the Hills

Like many things that are good for you, hills aren't particularly appetizing. But the extra effort it takes to trudge up them is worth it: For each degree of incline, count on at least a 10 percent increase in calories burned, according to Jana Klauer, M.D., a nutrition and metabolism expert and research fellow at St. Luke's-Roosevelt Hospital in New York City. So running up a 5 percent grade (a gentle hill) will burn 50 percent more calories than running on a totally flat surface for the same amount of time.
"You work harder when going uphill because you're moving forward and up at the same time," says Marcus Kilpatrick, Ph.D., an associate professor of exercise physiology at the University of South Florida in Tampa. Plus, hills recruit more muscles than flats do. The end result is increased calorie burn, a leaner body, and a perkier butt. Kastor recommends doing the following hill workout once a week:
Find a gentle hill or set your treadmill to a 5 percent incline.
Run up the hill at a hard but sustainable effort for 10 seconds. Jog or walk back to where you started, or reset the incline to zero, until you completely catch your breath (it should take about 45 to 60 seconds).
Beginner: Repeat four to eight times.
Seasoned runner: Repeat six to 10 times.

Strengthen Your Stride

If they gave best supporting actress awards for weight loss, strength training would take home the trophy every time. Think about it this way: Strength training makes you stronger from head to toe, so you can run harder every time you pound the pavement. A review of studies in The Journal of Strength and Conditioning Research found that runners who did resistance-training exercises two or three days a week, in addition to their weekly cardio regimens, increased their leg strength and enhanced their endurance—two things that contribute to weight loss.
And resistance exercise helps keep you injury-free, so you're not stuck on the couch when you could be incinerating calories on a run. A recent study in the journal Clinical Biomechanics found that female runners who did six weeks of lower-body exercises, like the ones that follow, improved their leg strength, particularly in the hips—a common source of pain and injury for runners.
If your schedule allows it, try lifting before you run to increase fat burning while you run. "Resistance training is mostly a carb-burning activity," explains Westcott. "After about 20 minutes of strength training, you deplete your glycogen stores (carbs) so fat is readily available to burn."
And even if you don't follow strength training with a run, you still get an after burn.
"You elevate your metabolism by 25 percent for the 60 minutes following resistance exercise," says Westcott. So if you burn 200 calories in a 20-minute strength session, count on sizzling an additional 50 calories after your last rep. This total-body strength workout designed by Kate Moran, a trainer at Equinox gym in Chicago, takes no more than 20 minutes and complements the running plans above. "Working the glutes, hamstrings, and core will help you prevent injury and become stronger so that you get more out of your runs," says Moran.
Do three sets of 12 to 15 reps (unless otherwise noted) twice a week; rest for 30 seconds between sets. All you'll need to complete the routine is a pair of five- to 10-pound dumbbells and a resistance band.
Unilateral lift Grab a dumbbell in each hand, stand on one leg (keep it as straight as possible), and lift the other leg slightly off the floor. With your raised foot stationary, lean forward with your arms straight and extended toward the floor as you bend at the hips (not the knees) and keep your back flat. Return to start without lowering your raised foot.
Lateral-band walk: Place a resistance band around your ankles. Stand with your feet hip-width apart, then step to the side with one foot, keeping your toes facing forward. Bring your feet back together; repeat. Walk 15 steps in one direction, and then 15 steps back, leading with the opposite foot. That's one set. Repeat three times.
Marching hip raise: Lie on your back with your knees bent and feet flat on the floor. Raise your hips to create a straight line from your knees to your shoulders. Lift one knee to your chest, trying not to drop your hips. Lower, then lift your other knee to your chest. That's one rep.
Leg raise: Lie on your back with your arms by your sides, palms up. Keeping your legs straight, raise them until they are perpendicular to the floor. Slowly bring them back to the starting position, keeping your lower back against the floor.

Go Long (in Moderation)

The good news is that you don't need to log more than one long run a week to get the max calorie-burning benefit, and a long run means 30 minutes or more. This sustained effort will improve your endurance by increasing your heart's capacity and strengthening ligaments and tendons, so you feel stronger during your short runs, says Kastor, who created the "Run Off the Weight" training plans, above. "And the more effort you can put into each workout, the more calories you'll burn."