The Things I Said I'd Never Do

Adios Day Care

2011-06-09T15:23:00.000-04:00

This week I turned in Max's "two week notice" at his day care. He's been there for almost a year and in that year he's been sick approximately 4839204830 times. Tests have been run to check for immune deficinies but he's totally fine. He's just more susecptible to catching a bug than your average toddler.

About a month ago, I got another "Come get your sick kid right now" call while I was at work. He hadn't been over his last fever but a week. I burst into tears as soon as I hung up the phone. I hated seeing my poor guy suffer. I hated that he flipped out instantly upon walking into the doctors office. I hated watching finger prick after blood draw after antibiotic shot. The poor child was a human pin cushion. I also hated that I was constantly leaving work or calling in to take care of him. My co-workers (all parents as well) are sympatheic but people can only cover my butt for so long.

I made an instant decision. I was pulling him out of that day care. I didn't know what the next step would be. Quit working and stay at home? Smaller day care? Find a Babysitter? Some other option? We needed a change, and soon.

It wasn't just the frequent illness. There were other reasons I wanted him out of that facility. Nothing major and nothing I want to air on the internet, but I knew a better option was out there. Finding something new was an idea Brett and I have been kicking around for awhile but now it was time to take action.

We reseachered other facilities. I picked the brains of friends who were stay at home moms. (For those who answered me, thank you so much for your honest responses.) We interviewed babysitters. We took a close look at our finances. (And by me I mean Brett. I'm numbers incompetent).

After a few tears, a lot of prayers and several more gray hairs, we offered the job to a babysitter and she starts in just over a week.

I'm still nervous about this decision. I'm weirded out that someone will be in my house while I am not there. What if she sees our dvd collection or DVR que, sees we have terrible taste and runs without notice? I no longer have some of the flexibility I did with day care. Running late or changing my schedule isn't as easy. What will I do to make sure Max gets socilization with other kids?

However, outside of less exposure to germs, there are other benefits. Max naps longer and more frequently at home. He can sleep later too, since most mornings we wake him up to get ready. The additional sleep alone will help him stay healthy. For me, I will now have 50-60 minutes (round trip) of kid free commuting that won't involve a screaming toddler or Bob the Builder DVD's blaring behind me. Also, since I won't have to get him up and ready for the day, I get an extra 30 minutes of sleep!

So it's time for Max's next chapter. Who knows how it will go? It could be the best thing to happen to him. I could be frantically scrambling to find help in 2 weeks. I could get fired, having someone else make the stay-at-home-mom decision for me. Whatever happens I just want to end up in what is the best situation for my son.

Wish me luck because I suck at change!

A First Birthday Letter- A Bit Belated

2011-05-31T20:17:00.000-04:00

Dear Max,

You are one! Ok, technically, at this point you are almost 15 months but you come from a long line of procrastinators. Sorry.

So much as been going on since you came into my world on March 20th, 2010 at 2:36am. I don’t remember much of it though because most of that time was spent in a sleepless haze. You weren’t really big on the sleeping the first 11 months of your life. While you still won’t be winning any world records for your sleeping ability, I am now able to get regular doses of 8 hour nights. Thank you.

I’ll be brutally honest. The first year of your life was hard. It’s not that I didn’t love you. Don’t ever doubt that for a second. It’s just I was ill prepared to give up my cushy life of extra time, extra sleep and extra money. I was selfish and not ready to let go. Plus, I was in a deep post partum depression for the first chunk of that year. With the help of you wonderful Dad, those days are past.

Despite that, there are still many wonderful memories of your first year. The first time you smiled at me as I looked at you through the slats of your crib. The first time you laughed when I picked you up and hoisted you into the air. The first time I watched you pull yourself up without any warning or previous attempts. In fact, for a lot of your firsts, you didn’t give us much warning. You aren’t one for practice or trial runs. You got from 0 to 60 in everything you do. You are a lot like your Dad in that respect. I will never forget the first time I went to wake you up from your nap and there you were, standing up like you’ve been doing it forever.

You’ve been lucky enough to take multiple trips in your first year. You’ve been in an airplane more time your first year than I was at age 16. You’ve been to Asheville , Chicago , Akron and Disney World (where you spiked 103 fever two hours after we entered the park). You’ve visited zoo’s, wildlife refuges, hotels and parks. If I would let you, you would spend your entire day playing in the fountains in downtown Savannah .

And now, your time as a baby is over. You are a full fledged toddler now and it’s an absolute joy to watch you. You prefer to walk. You have preferences, which you let us know about (usually very loudly). You play games like “So Big” and you have more teeth than most professional hockey players. I love to watch you “read” books out loud and listen to you talk to yourself as you play with your toys or watch the world from your stroller. Any day now I expect your first word. Given that you have to commute with me every day, I’m worried it’s going to be inappropriate.

You eat regular food now without any assistance and get annoyed when I tried to feed you softer foods like yogurt and oatmeal. You wouldn’t know what to do with a bottle any more and I was surprised at how easy you gave them up. I wish I could say the same thing about your thumb. You are willing to try everything but if it was up to you, your diet would consist of nothing but graham crackers and cantaloupe.

I’m looking forward to the next year, Maxwell. There is so much out there your Dad and I want you to experience. We have more trips to take, games to play and people to visit. There are more hugs, kisses and cuddles to come. Sure there are also more bumps, fevers, temper tantrums and longs nights ahead too. But there is nothing that as a family, we can’t handle.

Thank you for all the good times and the bad.

Thank you for all the things I can’t find the words to say.

Thank you Max for letting me be your Mommy.

My not so triumphant return to blogging!

2011-05-30T07:24:00.000-04:00

There are plenty of good reasons for my disappearance from the blogosphere. Hubby is done with his Master’s program so we have more time to hang out. Work is insane and I’m too drained to write a complete sentence at the end of the day. I’m a little lazy. I’m still training for a half marathon and my distances are getting longer and more time consuming. Max is now mobile and requires much more work simply to keep him injury free. (seriously dude, stop chewing on cords!). I was burned out from trying to “keep up with the Jones’s of the blogging world”. And yadda and yadda and yadda.

I could go on explaining myself for multiple paragraphs but I realize that no one probably cares why I stopped. But there have been multiple inquiries from friends and family as to when I plan to start writing again. So I thought about it and to be honest, I miss writing. I miss connecting with other people trying to survive this crazy ride we call parenthood. I miss getting my thoughts out into the universe where other people can choose to agree, disagree, ignore, pick a fight or cheer me on.

So I’m blogging again but this time I’m not going to get wrapped up in outside factors. I’m not going to worry about comments and commenting but instead focus on the important thing- creating a place where I go back and revisit memories of Max growing up once he’s not so little anymore. Maybe one day too he can look at this blog and see how much his Mama has loved him since day one.

And I leave you with this video, taken a few weeks ago.

See. I have my hands full!

Embracing My Lovely Lady Lumps*

2011-03-02T06:21:00.001-05:00

I'm hippy.

Not a hippie (the smell of patcholi makes me sick) but rather hippy.

As in, I have hips. Not just hips but curves. Lots of them. Yes, I also have extra pounds creating those curves but even if I lost 100 lbs, I would never be some stick thin supermodel. It's not in my blood. If you look at the women on both sides of my family, you see that even those who could classified as thin still rock big boobs, a small waist and big hips. We are a breed of curvy ladies with bodies designed for birthin' babies. I have several thousand cousins. We breed frequently.

Even as I continue to lose weight, I keep a realistic body image. I've struggled with it for years, but I finally accept and grown to love the fact that nothing about me will ever be flat. At a healthy weight I will still have round corners and wide hips. That's ok.

As a teenager and young adult, I had issues with my curves, especially my hips. But as a mother, I'm really starting to embrace them.

It's those wide hips that allowed me to have a 10lb 4 oz baby naturally. I try to look at stomach pooch not as a result of too many Oreos but rather as a beautiful war wound from a happy pregnancy.

Today I appreciated my hips as they helped me balance a fussy, dirty baby, 4 bags and an iced latte into the Target bathroom. Max perched securely on one hip while I fumbled with the changing table. After the changing I used my hips to close the table back up, open the bathroom door and push a cart that was blocking the exit. Now that I seem to constantly have my hands full, my hips are working overtime to help me get through thte day.

While I still, and may always have body issues, motherhood has helped me embrace my body and see that it's truly amazing. Especially those hips.

*Sorry for the terrible Black Eyed Peas inspired title. That damn song kept running through my head as I wrote this.

A Recipe for a Happy Momma

2011-02-24T08:34:00.000-05:00

1 Suprisingly Large Tax Return

1 Round Trip Ticket to New York City

4 days

0 children

0 husbands

1 dear friend to meet you at the airport

1 long run in an iconic city

2-10 large ice cold beers consumed in a beer garden (adjust according to taste and tolerance)

Several hours of gossip

1 designer knock-off handbag

1 (or more) meals at a restaurant serving food you can't find in your own town

1 visit with little sister

1 visit with sister in law and future brother in law

Unlimited hugs and laughter.

Directions: On April 14th, mix all ingredients together until well blended. Serve to this Momma. Watch her get her groove back in New York, then come back to Savannah refreshed but desperately missing her husband and son.

Only 48 days to go...but who's counting?

This post is slightly tweaking two of Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop prompts.

Friday Foodstuffs: I Might Have Been Drunk While Writing This

2011-02-18T21:45:00.000-05:00

We had a pretty delicious week. I highly recommend the Greek Chicken and Barley Salad. It was by far my favorite. Plus, I was able to use to the left over chicken from the Coq Au Vin (which wasn’t good as a meal). I’m pretty terrible when it comes to “re-purposing” leftovers. Most of the time we don’t have any b~~ecause my husband eats enough for four~~ and what we do have is consumed for lunch. So by using the left over chicken I felt pretty thrifty. Later that night I did our grocery shopping and realized, when I saw my total, I actually suck at thrifty.

This weeks menu:

Friday: Homemade Pizza and salads
Saturday: Leftovers
Sunday: Steak, Sweet potatoes
Monday: Baked Potato Soup
Tuesday: Chicken Tikka Masala, Rice
Wednesday: Salmon Masala, Roasted Broccoli
Thursday: Waffles and Bacon, Fruit Salad

There isn’t any theme of plan around this week’s menu other than “I saw it on the internet and it looks tasty”. I’m trying to do better about tracking my Weight Watchers points through the week...and I'll start after this Gin and Tonic*. So most of the recipes came from WW friendly sites. Minus the Chicken Tikka Masala. That just looked delicious and sometimes you gotta splurge.

What are you eating this week?

*Please pardon the fact there are a crapload of errors in this post. My husband pours with a heavy hand.

Wordless Wednesday: Don’t sweat the small stuff

2011-02-16T19:12:00.000-05:00

Sometimes it’s easier to just let him eat off the clean floor than it is to sweep up the Cheerios for the 73rd time.

This post is part of Wordful Wednesday over at Parenting by Dummies.

Even Darth Vader Deserves Some Love

2011-02-14T19:50:00.001-05:00

I’m not really big into Valentine’s Day. While I’ve had the best Valentine ever since 2006, 25 years of previous bitterness takes some time to get over. Brett and I never do much to celebrate since it’s basically a Hallmark holiday anyway, but we at least acknowledge it’s existence by getting Chinese take-out and eating it directly out of the container. Even though we say we don’t do gifts, Brett and I usually end up finding a small, silly, trinket to give to each other. This year I got him a heart shape cookie cake, which is already 90% consumed (with my help) and he got me this bit of awesomeness:

Aren't nerds in love cute?

The best gift of all came from our little Valentine: An entire night of sleep without even the slightest whimper. After 2 weeks of illness and schedule craziness, Brett and I couldn’t ask for a better gift!

Whether you celebrate with flair, or dress in black to protest, I hope you day is fantastic.

Friday Foodstuffs: How I've lost 22 lbs

2011-02-11T19:36:00.000-05:00

A few months ago I wrote about how I wasn’t happy with how I looked and I was making a change. Well, it hasn’t been an empty threat. Since Halloween I have lost 22 lbs, completed the Couch to 5K training program, ran my first 5K race (very slowly, in the pouring rain, where I was narrowly beat out by man dressed as a can of Pabst Blue Ribbon) I even have joined a group training for the Rock n Roll half marathon coming to town in November.

I'm in the Indiana Shirt, to the right of the human PBR can.

And I’ve done it all while still eating really well. I’ll admit, it takes some serious discipline and I haven’t had a whole lot of bread or booze since I got started on Weight Watchers. However, I have been able to find satisfying alternatives to fit my cravings yet still stay within the program. Sure I’ve had bad days. With Max being sick the last two weeks we’ve had take out more times then I care to admit and on Wednesday I’m pretty sure I ate my weight in Dove dark chocolate hearts. Still, it’s a lifestyle change and I won’t let a few days derail me.

Here’s what we are eating this week:

Friday: Crab Cakes
Saturday: Coq au Vin (from Weight Watchers Magazine)
Sunday: Steak, Roasted Asparagus with Horseradish Dressing (from Weight Watchers Magazine)
Monday: Chinese Take-out (going on year 5 of this Valentine's Day tradition with my love)
Tuesday: Greek Chicken and Barley Salad
Wednesday: Pasta with sauce and veggies
Thursday: Pan Grilled Pork Chops with Grilled Pineapple Salsa, Black Beans

Also, if you are interested in learning more about meal planning, from finding the best recipe to navigating the grocery store with rambunctious children, go check out Mama Nash’s blog. She is doing a great series on meal planning and has some stellar tips.

The Working Mom's Blues

2011-02-09T09:52:00.000-05:00

We were having a good run. Since Christmas there hadn't been so much as a runny nose in our house. No trips to the doctor or the pharmacy were taken. All three of us were feeling good. Then last week, as I was packing up after a long day at work, a number popped up on my caller ID.

Day Care.

Crap.

"Hi Ms. P-, this is Ms So-and-so from Maxwell's daycare. He's running 102.5 underarm and we need you to come pick him up."

That was last Tuesday and he hasn't been back to day care since.

This fever issue was generally mild. Between working strange hours, switching shifts and one round at the sick room at work (where Max will never go back too, but that's another story), Brett and I actually managed to work a full week. By Friday he was good as new and we enjoyed a nice weekend as a family.

Since I work part time, I was off on Monday. Max was acting totally fine and I was accomplishing some serious house cleaning. At 3PM, things changed. First there was the diaper which I heard from across the room. An hour later I was cleaning vomit from the front of my shirt. And I continued to clean vomit as the poor child counldn't keep even the smallest amounts of liquid down.

I felt terrible for my son. He was (and still is) absolutely miserable. However, I also panicked. How can I call in sick AGAIN when I had to do the same thing last week? I don't have family in town. Most of my friends work full time and if they don't, they also have kids and don't want to run the risk of catching Max's bug. Brett and I have no choice but to creatively rearrange our schedules so we can watch Max yet make important meetings and deadlines.

I'm lucky- my boss is fabulous (and no, she doesn't read this! I'm not sucking up!). She has children and has been in my shoes. She's told me time and time again not to feel guilty about taking care of my sick kid. My schedule is flexbile and I can work whenever I can. Still, as her assistant, I know she depends on me and I hate having to call in so frequently, espeically when it's two weeks in a row. My husband too works for a family friendly company, but they are in critical mode right now and it's a lot harder to get away. Plus, his job is our primary income, so he can't take as many risks.

So now, as I sit here, waiting for my husband to be done with his half of the day so I can run to work and play catch up, I wonder how much of this is worth it? At what point does the lost vacation, lost money (day care still gets paid even if the kid doesn't show up) and stress from being off start to trump the little bit of extra income I bring home?

At what point do I step away from the job I love, at a company I love, with co-workers that I love because of guilt? Guilt that I need someone else to take care of my kid when sick. Guilt that I can't do my job to the best of my ability. Guilt that I'm not Supermom, SuperEmployee and SuperWife. Guilt that I am working because I want to and not because, financially, I have too.

There's no easy answer. Some people love being a stay at home parent and swear it is the only life for them. Others claim they are a better parent because they work and cherish the time they do have at home. I have my foot in both worlds and still can't manage to make it work.

This is an issue that requires more discerment and I'm not quite ready to make a decison.

So for now, I just sit an sing the Working Mom's Blues.

PS. Sorry for the bloggy absence, but I'm back! Miss me?

The First Lesson of Motherhood: Trust Your Gut

2011-01-13T06:46:00.001-05:00

Something wasn't right. I hadn't been a parent for more than 48 hours but as I held my screaming son, I knew in my gut something was wrong.

"He's just a baby. Babies scream"

"He's latching fine. He'll get what he needs".

"Don't give him a bottle, it will doom your nursing relationship forever."

I'm sure those people were right. They were long time parents, professionals with degrees and people who had been in my shoes before. What did I know? I listened to them while ignoring that voice in my head that kept repeating "This is not working".

The voice got louder a few hours later when my neighbor, a retired RN, stopped by to meet Max. On her first glance she stated "He's looking a little yellow. Keep an eye on that".

The night came. Max continued to latch, hang out there for a few minutes, pull off and start screaming again. All night long he screamed and screamed. We rocked, bounced, shushed, and swaddled. We called my mother in law at 1AM to help. I couldn't do much more than cry, feeling like I was failing him.

The next morning was his 3 day pediatrician visit. While we were getting ready, I suggested taking Max's temperature. He felt warm but I wasn't sure what was warm for a newborn. He had a mild fever. I actually felt some relief. At least I knew that was part of the problem. I didn't know a low fever in a newborn meant an automatic hospital admission until we told the nurse at the pedi's office. I sat in shock as she wrote up orders and gave us directions on how to get to the pediatric unit.

I remained in shock at the hospital as they repeatedly poked my son, trying to find a vein for an antibiotic IV. Multiple veins were blown. Finally they gave him Pedialyte which he rapidly drank and then promptly fell asleep for the first time in hours. I started to put the pieces together.

We settled in our room and I met the lactation consultant. I tried pumping for the first time. Not a drop. I was devastated but I was also relieved. Things started to fall into place. My milk hadn't come in. Max wasn't even getting colostrum to sustain him. He was dehydrated, causing the jaundice, fever and constant screaming. I finally had the answers needed to make him better. A rush of relief swept over me.

It was at that point, 72 hours into parenthood I realized the "experts" were full of crud. Their degrees and experience couldn't replace a mothers intuition. The voice in the back of my head screamed "I told you so!". It was right. Since then, when it comes to Max, I always listen.

Impending Doom

2011-01-11T20:45:00.000-05:00

It's coming. It's just under the surface, ready to explode. If you listen carefully you can hear the faint strains of the "Jaws" theme, coming from the nursery, signaling an attack. Da Dum.......Da Dum......... It's looming like a dark cloud and when it finally attacks, Brett and I are toast.

Toddlerhood.

It's almost here.

Crap.

Over the past month, Max has developed several new skills and habits transitioning him out of infancy. I'm starting to see that having a toddler is going to be no picnic.

First, there's this:

This means that walking is just around the corner. Walking means that more baby gates need to be installed and everything that isn't a toy will need to be at least three feet off the ground. No remote, power cords or dropped potato chip on the floor has been safe since he started crawling. Now I can no longer leave my cups on the ottoman or my laptop on the couch. He is mere inches from pressing the buttons on the TV and it's time to double check the strength of all furniture mounted to the walls. I used to be appalled by baby jails like this.

Now I'm wondering if I can find one on eBay.

Max has also started to develop food preferences. I started giving him peas as finger food. Now he refuses anything pureed. When I try to spoon feed he bats the spoon away leaving sweet potatoes stuck to the ceiling and me. The other day I came back from the grocery store and realized I was shopping with mashed cauliflower in my hair.

Along with wanting to feed himself, Max decided he'll only eat fruit and peas. Meats get thrown to the floor, green beans stuffed in the corners of the high chair and broccoli spit across the kitchen. I'm contemplating a dog just to help aid in clean up. Oh, but if I plop down on the couch to enjoy a quick snack, you can bet Max will be up in my grille immediately, clawing up my leg to get a bite.

Rice Cakes? I love rice cakes!

Finally, there is the talking...rather, screaming. The baba's, dada's and yaya's are cute. I love to listen to him babble as he tries to figure out a new toy or wants to join in the conversation. However when he's mad, his choice babble is of course, MMOOOOOMMMOOOOOMMOOMM MAMAMAMAMAMAMAMAMAMAMA!!!!!! He's also started full on screaming when upset. Not just crying but a full high pitched screech to let us know he's mad as heck and he isn't gonna take it anymore. He's started to throw tantrums at bath time, complete with screeching, yanking, biting and flailing of limbs. I'm trying to laugh it off now, but I see tantrums being a lot less funny when they occur in public places.

So, it begins. I know that with the bad, there will also be good. To have him make the connection that I'm "mom" and Brett is "dad" will be incredible. Giving me a hug for the first time will turn me in the blubbering mess. Knowing that as of now he is developing right on schedule, is an answer to my prayers. However, when those terrible toddler traits rear there ugly head more frequently, I think I'll spending a bit more time with my own sippy cup.

I got TWO of these for Christmas. My family thinks I'm a wino.
They're right

A Good Start to a New Year

2011-01-06T22:34:00.000-05:00

I have always hated New Years Eve. It's a night where you are expected to get dressed up, go to a club or a fancy party, be surrounded by strangers and have way to much to drink. All of that sounds like my worst nightmare. Even in college, where I was supposed to be a party animal, I preferred the homebody lifestyle. It was quite refreshing this year when Facebook statuses and Twitter updates all declared the same sentiment -"I'll be lucky if I make it to midnight". Finally, my peer group is catching up to my old lady mindset!

If my 2010 NYE celebration is any indication on how my 2011 is going to go, it's going to be a good year.

First, it was spent with my husband, son, and only a few close friends. We all gathered at a friends house, dressed in comfortable clothes and enjoyed each others company. No blaring music. No drunk strangers. No seizure inducing strobe lights. Just good conversation and lots of laughs with those I love. That sounds like a good way to spend most of 2011, don't you think?

Second, there was great food. We stuffed our faces with various styles of fondue and things to dip into the oil, cheese or chocolate. Good wine was also involved. While 2011 is my year of health and weight loss, I do plan the occasional indulgence and hope the future brings many delicious meals.

Third, there were fireworks. Technically I don't like fireworks. They scare me and I'm always worried someone is going to blow off their hand. However, I do like excitement, surprise, inspiration and bursts of color. I hope 2011 is full of the happy, unexpected surprise that keeps life interesting and joyful. I also hope to keep all my limbs in tact.

Finally my New Years Eve celebration involved the blessed joining of two massive forces: New Kids on the Block and the Backstreet Boys. My guilty pleasure sensors were on absolute overload. My Cheese-o-Meter was off the charts. I am not ashamed to admit I loved watching the boy band-palooza. I can only hope that my 2011 is filled with more silliness, more guilty pleasures and more laughter. Oh, and also tickets to the Atlanta BSB/NKOTB reunion tour this spring. Please don't judge me. You know you loved it too.

If my New Years Eve celebration is any indication of how new year will go, I think I'm in for a treat.

This post was inspired by the Writers Workshop prompt: If the way you spent your New Year’s Eve is any indication of how the rest of the year will go, how would you say your future is looking right about now?

Wordful Wednesday: The favorites of 2010

2011-01-05T20:55:00.000-05:00

I know, I know. It's 5 days into 2010. It's a little late for a year in review post but I've had a lot to do recently. Like not taking down Christmas decorations. And reading books on my Kindle. And laughing at Max's new dance moves (which I am desperately trying to capture on video). So, obviously, I 've been busy.

2010 was a huge year. I don't think I could wrap it up with words. I do however have at least 10,000 pictures from the year. I tried to narrow it down to a top 10, but that is basically impossible. Instead, here's some of my favorites from the year, in semi chronological order

1) Me and Al on the last kid-free trip toWashington DC, visiting our friends Nathan and Emily.

2) This is the first picture I took of Max. He was less than an hour old and it was the first picture that introduced him to the world (and by world I mean Facebook). I can't believe he was ever this small.

3) At 4 days old after his first admission to the pediatrics unit for fever, jaundice and dehydration. It was the sign that I needed that things were going to be ok.

4) Max was a month old in this picture. It looks like a sweet shot of us bonding on the beach. In actually I was still dealing with PPD and he was screaming bloody murder because like his dad, he hates the beach. Despite the circumstances, I still love this shot.

5) Our good friend Teresa took this as part of his first photoshoot. Even at 8 weeks old, Max was a total ham in from of the camera. The child can be mid tantrum but when he hears the pop of the flash he begins to pose

6) This face cracks me up every time.

7) Brett's first Father's Day

8) Baptism day

9) At the Biltmore in Asheville, NC

10) This is the face of one sleepy, satisfied baby. Taken in downtown Asheville.

11) I feel bad because this was taken during one of Max's first illnesses but seriously it's too adorable not to share.

12) Look! A kid free picture! This was with Chef Jerome at Old School Diner, one of the most insane dining experiences I've ever had in my life. Many thanks to our friend Brad (far left) for introducing us to this place.

13) My little pumpkin frolicking in the pumpkins.

14)Taken at the Brookfield Zoo. He LOVED looking at the sea lions.

15) Snow!

This post is part of Wordful Wednesdays (because some days I can't be quiet) over at my favorite new blog Parenting my Dummies.

I was busy

2011-01-02T18:45:00.001-05:00

I didn't purposely stop blogging. It wasn't some concious effort to spend more time with my family over the holidays. It wasn't a pledge I signed with other bloggers. I even composed multiple posts in my head but never posted them because I was busy.

Busy celebrating my 29th birthday (for the second time)

Busy attempting the 12 hour drive between Savannah, GA and Akron, OH.

Busy discovering rocking deals on hotel suites when we gave up the dream of driving 12 hours straight with a 9 month old.

Busy hugging familiar faces and meeting new ones.

Busy eating obscene amount of calories.

source

Busy opening an obscene amount of gifts

Busy curled up on a chair with my new love.

Busy catching projectile vomit in my hands at Christmas brunch and trying to calm a baby with another ear infection.

Busy finding an urgent care open the day after Christmas in Akron.

Busy enjoying midday naps and lunch dates with my husband while Grandma and Grandpa happily babysat.

Busy reveling in the joy of an upside down Christmas tree.

Busy playing in the snow.

Busy listening to my little man discover his voice and find his footing

Busy having the best two weeks of 2010.

#2..No, Not That Kind.

2010-12-18T16:00:00.000-05:00

There is this weird competitiveness going on with the moms at Max’s day care. Since I’m the horrible parent that drops her kid off early and picks him up late, I am usually lucky enough to avoid these manic mama’s. However, when I do run into one they always seem to have some comment dripping with bitchiness.

“Wow, his cough is really bad, I can’t believe you are bringing him in” – Says the mom holding a child with goop pouring out of her eye.

“Every time I drop my son off, Max seems to be crying”- Says the mom who’s child is screaming bloody murder every time I stop by for a lunchtime visit.

“When I came in today, your son was crawling right over my little boy” – Yes, he probably was considering he’s 9 months and hasn’t quite grasped common courtesy yet or the ability to go in any direction other than a straight line, even if it means crawling over whatever is in his path.

When these comments occur I usually smile and ignore the mom (the Dad’s never make comments. I like them better). I refuse to get into a “my child is the greatest" war with some over-competitive mom. However, the latest round of comments and questions involve me and not Max, making it hard to my tongue.

Now that Max is about move up to the toddler’s room (even if he isn’t anywhere near actually toddling) everyone is asking me “So when are you going to have another child?”. Some of the moms are already sprouting little baby bumps. Whenever I am asked this (in my opinion) very personal question it’s hard not to jump out of my skin. First, I can’t believe they are asking the question considering I barely know them and it’s none of their business. Second, the tone in which they ask implies that I should be absolutely craving a second child and it’s almost ridiculous that I’m not pregnant yet.

What I say is “No, I’m just enjoying spoiling Max”.

What I want blurt out (in one breath) is “Well, even though it’s none of your business no, I do not plan on having a second child anytime soon and the thought of it makes my reproductive system tremble with horror. I’m still mentally and physically recovering from a 34 hour labor and pushing out a 10lb 4oz baby and honestly at this point in my life I’m not entirely convinced that I even want to have a second child anymore because I’m having trouble adjusting to just having one kid. Plus, I want to lose about 50 more lbs before getting knocked up AND I want to run a half marathon next fall which will be really hard to accomplish if pregnant. Plus, after Max was born my mom made me promise I wouldn’t have another kid until he was at least two because she had two kids in quick succession and said it pretty much sucked. Really who wants to break a promise to their mom? Aren’t you glad you pried into my personal life even though you don’t know my first name*?”.

Now that I think about it, maybe I should give them my whole spiel. Perhaps it will freak them out enough that they’ll never talk to me again. That would be ideal because I foresee this conversation happening soon:

*P.S.- I don’t think there is anything wrong with having kids close together. I just know it’s not the path Brett and I should take.

Friday Foodstuffs: I'm Shrinking!

2010-12-17T20:40:00.001-05:00

I haven't done a Friday Foodstuffs in awhile. To be honest, cooking hasn't been nearly as fun since
I started Weight Watchers. I've found a few good recipes but I miss things like real butter and a
second helping. Still, I know there are good recipes out there, so I keep searching and cooking.

Oh, and even though you probably care less, since Halloween I've lost 16lbs and dropped a pants
size. So all this light eating is actually worth it. Plus, with the Weight Watchers program, I get
the occasional induldgence. I just can't induldge every day, which is how I ended up at Weight Watchers in the first place.

It's short week of meals because on Wednesday night (my 30th birthday for those who want to send gifts) we're driving throught the night to spend the holidays with my husband's family. Despite the temptation to get take out every day until we leave, I am going to cook hearty, healthy meals.

Friday: Slow Cooker Chicken Chili For the record, I just polished of a bowl of this and it was awesome!
Saturday: Sushi (ok, that's not homemade)
Sunday: Grilled Flank Steak with Mango Chutney. Steamed Snow Peas
Monday: Brett is eating Lightened up Chicken Divan. I'm going out with a friend to ~~cry over~~ celebrate the fact I'm 30.
Tuesday: Garden Veggie Soup. Anything in our fridge that might go bad while we are freezing our asses off in Ohio.
Wednesday: Multiple shots of 5-Hour Energy to get us through an overnight drive. And probably birthday cake.
Thursday through December 28th. Nothing but sausage balls, coffee and Swensons hamburgers. It's what we do when in Akron.

Sigh. I'm going to have to do a lot of running to make up for the Christmas trip......

What are you eating this week?

Go Elf Yourself

2010-12-13T17:18:00.000-05:00

Every year I am presented with the opportunity to waste a solid 45 minutes picking out the perfect picture, uploading it and turning it into hilarious videos of myself, family and friends doing silly dances in silly costumes. Merry Christmas, it's Elf Yourself season!! These silly little videos having me peeing my pants in laughter (much easier to do after birthing a 10lb 4oz baby) and this year is no exception.

Then I saw that Chip and Bobo's mom is hosting an Elf Off and I had to join! I mean doesn't everyone want to see my son disco dancing?

Now, let's see yours! Go Elf Yourself!

Personalize funny videos and birthday eCards at JibJab!

Antibiotics and Eggnog

2010-12-12T09:29:00.000-05:00

‘Twas two weeks before Christmas and all through the house
All the creatures were stirring and starting to grouse
Tissues were used and then flung through the air
In hopes of hitting the wastebasket way over there

The baby was screaming, standing up in his bed
While his ears pounded, hurting his head
And Mom’s nose kept running while her fever ran high
And Dad could only whisper, his voice went goodbye

The baby continued to make horrible clatter
So Mom took him to the doctor to see what’s the matter
Both ears were infected, four teeth coming in
Plus an infection for the kiddo, under the skin

And Mom with her nose now running green
Went to see her doctor who was very mean
She had a large sinus infection, thanks to the baby
Antibiotics might help but it’s only a maybe

Now Sudafed, Now Mucinex, Now Vitamin C
Now Optic Drops and Zithromax and a large mug of tea
Now Orajel, Now Ibuprofen and an antibiotic lotion
Hopefully all of these things will create the magic potion

Now our little trio of sickies rests by the glow of the tree
In hopes that soon a bill of clean health will we see
Til then we will rest and infections we will fight
Healthy Christmas to all and to all a good night!

Deck the Freaking Halls

2010-12-09T20:08:00.001-05:00

It started Black Friday, the day after Thanksgiving. The Twitter and Facebook updates of friends and family proclaiming their holiday shopping was complete. Pictures were posted of their house, decorated to rival the home of Martha Stewart. Festive trees were up, stocking were hung and lights covered every inch of possible roof space. Even bathrooms proclaimed the joy of the holiday season. BATHROOMS.

In the past this has caused me to panic. How was I, the most un-crafty, design dumb , anti-Martha of them all supposed to keep up? Can I throw the most incredible holiday shindig of the year when not all of my windows are draped with boughs of holly? This year I've accepted I am NOT those people and I can't compete. Sure,I finally got the decorations are up but they don't match and my house doesn't have a theme (unless "A Very Merry Dollar Store Christmas" counts as a theme).

When I've mentioned the fact I wasn't planning to go all out decorating for this Christmas, people reacted with horror. "But it's Max's first Christmas" they would say. "But he's nine months old and won't remember a damn thing" I would reply. That display of logic never just caused people to shake their head in sadness.
Besides, we are spending Christmas out of town with my in-laws. I'm pretty sure their house will look like Santa's workshop and it will be enough to keep Max from crying to his therapist in 30 years. "Everything sucks because Mother didn't love me enough. She barely decorated for my first Christmas…"

So hear I sit next to the glow of our fake, spindly Christmas tree doing all my Christmas shopping via Amazon (stores this season make me look for the nearest clock tower). And I'm happy. This year, I'm enjoying the holidays my way- focused on my family our cozy home. I'm not worried about the perfect gift or stressing over the lack of festive garland draped on the staircase. I'm going to relax, drink a few mugs of Weight Watchers friendly hot chocolate and enjoy the holidays instead of freaking out over creating the perfect First Christmas for my son.

I'm dreaming of a simple Christmas.

Suck it IntenseDebate

2010-12-06T12:31:00.003-05:00

Too many people can't comment on my blog because of IntenseDebate so I have uninstalled the program. However, that means I just lost 6 months worth of comments, which is pretty much the most depressing thing ever.

So, here's a test. If you can spare a second, please comment on this to let me know that I properly uninstalled Intense Debate and the boring old blogger comments are working properly.

And if they don't work and you have a spare 2 seconds, please email me at saididneverdo@gmail.com

Pardon me as I go sob into my Diet Coke. :-(

The Brief Version of Us

2010-12-02T20:38:00.001-05:00

First there were the emails.*

Then a phone call, which after an hour turned into lunch.

Before lunch arrived at our table he has asked me out on a date. I said yes.

The Tuesday before Thanksgiving I stressed over what to wear. I was meeting him directly after work and needed something work appropriate yet first date adorable. I went with a grey skirt and black knee high boots. They were great boots.

At dinner he had prime rib and I had a steak salad…with extra bleu cheese. I love me some moldy cheese. Following dinner we went to see Harry Potter. During the movie he grabbed my hand. I felt like I was in high school again…and I loved it.

After the movie we chatted in the parking lot, wanting to prolong the nice evening. But it was late and he had an early morning flight while I had one more day of work because going back to Chicago for the holiday. We said our goodbyes and he leaned in for the kiss. He was going for the cheek while I assumed he was going for the lips. As I walked back to my car after the first awkward kiss, I tripped over those fabulous boots.

A week later, both back in Savannah , we met for burgers. The meal ended too quickly so I joined him on an errand at the Lowes across the parking lot. We held hands as he picked out hypoallergenic air filters. Then another parking lot kiss…or three. As I drove home a nagging thought kept running through my head. “Uh oh. This is going to be HUGE”. I attempted to ignore those thoughts. We had not even had the DTR (determine the relationship) conversation.

Three days later I drove to his house after work. Actually, it was 5 years ago today!. He made me steak and baked potatoes topped with shredded Velveeta. He pulled a bottle of red wine out of the fridge. As a foodie and red wine lover, I didn’t even grimace. I liked him too much. Then we had the conversation.

Him: So are you seeing anyone else?

Me: No. Are you?

Him: No. Wanna keep it that way?

Me: Sure.

Five years later we have rings on our left hand and a child with his eyes and my nose is currently sleeping in a room that once held a drum kit and piano.

Those early days are some of my favorite memories. I wouldn't mind living them again and again.

*Of course we met online. We’re nerds. How else do nerds meet?

Thanksgiving Recap in Pictures

2010-11-30T20:27:00.000-05:00

I feel like I've been away from the internet for YEARS. We've spent the last 5 days in general Chicago area with my family. My parents wireless wasn't working and their computer is about a 1,000 years old. The internet could wait while I caught up with my family and friends over a glass of wine (or 4).

So much happened during our trip. Max had a great time meeting 4738247392 new family members while Brett and I had a great time stuffing our faces with yummy food only found in the Chicago area! This was the first time my brothers, sister and I were in the same state at once since Thanksgiving of 2008!

Here's a photo summary of our great trip!

We had to bundle Max up as he hadn't ever experienced such ridiculous weather

Regardless of clothing, he loved the Brookfield Zoo!

Actually, not so much.

Dylan and Aunt Emmy enjoyed the fake boat ride

Max was unimpressed by the gorilla.

But the sea lions kicked ass!

Dylan roared at the tiger but it ignored him.

Nothing says games with the grandparents like multiple glasses of red wine.

And in this family, when you're a pill, you get put on the fridge.

Max was ready to tree hunt in his tree hunting sweater! He also was consistently amused by Uncle Brian

Cousins!

The poor child froze during our trip to Indiana to find and cut down Christmas trees.

Accidental overexposure looking AWESOME!

Testing to see what the angel would look like!

Brunch with Great Gram and more family.

Max got to meet a new friend while I caught up with an old one!

Thanks for the book and hat, Ingram Family!!

The whole trip was a success! Max was great on the plane and better behaved then some of the adults. I was so glad to not have "that kid" on my first trip with baby! Despite the great trip, all three of us are glad to be back home (and out of the cold!)

Now, time to break out those Christmas decorations.

Wordless Wednesday: Best Friends

2010-11-24T06:00:00.002-05:00

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Lesson Learned-The Diaper Incident

2010-11-22T20:58:00.000-05:00

The two most important parenting lessons I have learned over past months are 1) Be Flexible and 2) Be Prepared. Yesterday, I slacked on less number #2 which required my budget to learn lesson #1.

I have been well initiated into the parenting club with many public diaper blowouts. Back when Max was born I always had an obscene number of wipes and extra outfits in my diaper bag. As he’s gotten older I’ve started to slack. I got complacent. Since Max started solid foods, diaper blow-outs weren’t really a concern. In fact, without getting into too much public detail about my son’s BM’s, I was usually cheering any dirty diaper that occurred.

Well, that came back to bite me yesterday. My dear friend Jess was in town for the weekend so on Sunday we heading downtown for lunch and site seeing. It was a gorgeous and mild day and Jess, being a Yankee, soaked up the sun and the 76 degree weather. Max was on his best behavior. Everything was perfect.

Before heading home, we stopped to give Max a bottle. Immediately after finishing, we heard the familiar grunt letting us know it a diaper change was needed. The villagers rejoiced that Max could finally eat bananas without consequence. There weren’t any public bathrooms with changing tables nearby so instead we found a secluded bench and commenced the changing. It was there we discovered this wasn’t any regular diaper. This was the mother of all diapers and it was EVERYWHERE. We also discovered I had a limited amount of wipes and no spare outfit.

Jess ran to the CVS up the street for wipes while Brett and I cleaned off Max the best we could while gingerly taking off the ruined outfit (which was ugly anyway) Exhibit A:

Cute kid, ugly, ill-fitting, jumper

As we didn’t have another outfit we just wrapped the poor kid up in a blanket.

Brett ran ahead to get the car while Jess and I walked to meet him half way. I hung my head in shame as people looked with disdain at the half naked baby. Then I saw it. The downtown Baby Gap! Hooray! My child wouldn’t need to spend his ride home mostly naked. Five minutes later, Max had a new, ridiculously overpriced thermal onesie. The sales girl was sympathetic. I could tell I wasn’t the first parent that rushed in with a naked kid and said “I’ll take anything warm and under $100”. I didn’t spring for pants though. Just the onesie. Pants are overrated and I’m not a millionaire. Instead, he had a blanket. Exhibit B:

Mom is too cheap for for pants.

So, lesson learned. Restock the diaper bag regularly and be sure to carry a spare outfit. Also, just in case, increase the spending limit on the credit card. Emergencies are expensive.