ALKYPOP

UK Jobseekers who reject help for alcohol and drug addiction face benefits cut

2012-05-23T01:20:00.001+01:00

Unemployed people suspected of suffering from alcoholism or drug addiction will have their benefits cut if they refuse treatment for their condition, the work and pensions secretary, Iain Duncan Smith, will signal on Wednesday. In a sign of the government's new benefits regime, which lies at the heart of Duncan Smith's cost-cutting welfare changes, staff in Jobcentre Plus offices will be encouraged to cut the jobseeker's allowance of claimants who reject treatment for addiction. The new rules will come into place in October 2013 when the universal credit, which is designed to wrap benefits into one payment, is introduced. A new claimant contract lies at the heart of the universal credit reforms. Claimants will have to sign a contract in which they agree to look for work in exchange for an undertaking from the government to support them while they do so. Government sources said the contract would allow Jobcentre Plus staff to say that a suspected addict is in breach of their commitments if they refuse help for alcoholism or drug addiction. Duncan Smith will give a flavour of the new rules when he addresses an event in parliament organised by Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). He will say: "The outdated benefits system fails to get people off drugs and put their lives on track. We have started changing how addicts are supported, but we must go further to actively take on the devastation that drugs and alcohol can cause. "Under universal credit we want to do more to encourage and support claimants into rehabilitation for addiction and starting them on the road to recovery and eventually work. Getting people into work and encouraging independence is our ultimate goal. Universal credit will put people on a journey towards a sustainable recovery so they are better placed to look for work in future and we will be outlining our plans shortly." It is understood that the work and pensions secretary will not make a formal announcement on Wednesday of the powers that will be handed to Jobcentre Plus staff. Duncan Smith wants to use the event to focus on what he regards as the positive work AA does in helping to treat alcoholism. A government source said: "Iain wants to focus on the brilliant work Alcoholics Anonymous does in changing people's lives. He really wants to encourage people who have drink problems to go to AA for treatment. It will transform their lives and will help them into work." The source said Duncan Smith believes it is right to give jobcentre staff powers to cut benefits if an addict refuses treatment because they can detect signs of trouble. The source said: "The universal credit will allow staff in Jobcentre Plus offices to say: this person has been unemployed for some time. The staff know if people are addicted to alcohol. They know the people they are dealing with. "But we want this to be positive and to be about signposting people to superb organisations that can help them. This is about changing their lives. It is very important to support addicts into the workplace." But if claimants refuse they will have their benefits docked. "There will be sanctions," the source said, citing cuts to the jobseeker's allowance as an example. Ministers believe that one indicator Jobcentre Plus staff can use to see whether a claimant is an addict is the amount of times they apply for a crisis loan. "If you are applying for that up to 10 times a year then that is a sign of a chaotic life," one source said. Analysis by the Department of Work and Pensions shows that almost 40,000 people claim incapacity benefit with alcoholism declared as their "primary diagnosis". Of these, 13,500 have been claiming for a decade or more. There are about 160,000 "dependent drinkers" in England who receive one or more of the main benefits. There are 1m violent crimes a year that are related to alcoholism and 1.2m admissions to hospitals a year related to alcoholism. Universal credit is the most important element of Duncan Smith's welfare reforms, developed during his years in opposition through his Centre for Social Justice, which is designed to achieve his central goal of encouraging people into work. It will integrate tax credits and out-of-work benefits into one payment, with the aim of smoothing the transition to work. Labour has given the universal credit a cautious welcome, though it has taken issue with the scale of benefit cuts. Lord Low of Dalston, the vice-president of the Royal National Institute of Blind People who sits as a crossbencher, told peers this year: "Though it has some very sensible and progressive things at its core, in the shape of the universal credit, nevertheless it goes too far to most people's consciences in the way in which it takes vital support away from some of the most needy in our society."

London buses have been booked to carry a Christian advertising campaign expected to start next week, which asserts the power of therapy to change the sexual orientation of gay people.

2012-04-12T17:39:00.001+01:00

Core Issues Trust's advert states: 'Not gay! Post-gay, ex-gay and proud. Get over it!' mimicking the style of Stonewall's: 'Some people are gay. Get over it' advertising campaign which has run recently.

The full length advert, which will appear on five different routes in the capital, is backed by the Core Issues Trust whose leader, Mike Davies, believes "homoerotic behaviour is sinful". His charity funds "reparative therapy" for gay Christians who believe that they have homosexual feelings but want to become straight. The campaign is also backed by Anglican Mainstream, an worldwide orthodox Anglican group whose supporters have equated homosexuality with alcoholism.

The advert will say: "Not gay! Post-gay, ex-gay and proud. Get over it!" Post-gay and ex-gay are terms used by Christians and some psychotherapists and psychiatrists to refer to homosexual people who have undergone spiritual or pastoral therapy and, according to an Anglican Mainstream definition, have "now left a homosexual lifestyle [and experienced] an increased emotional and sexual attraction to the opposite biological gender and possibly a reduction in or loss of same-sex attraction."

The buses are due to roll out on Monday morning on some of the most popular routes. They will be seen for two weeks travelling past St Paul's Cathedral, down Oxford Street, round Trafalgar Square and through Piccadilly Circus as well as across other parts of the capital.

The campaign is an explicit attempt to hit back at gay rights group Stonewall, which ran its own bus advert saying: "Some people are gay. Get over it." The Christian groups have used the same black, red and white colour scheme as Stonewall and accuses it of promoting the "false idea that there is indisputable scientific evidence that people are born gay".

The Rev Lynda Rose, a spokesperson for the UK branch of Anglican Mainstream said because her group adheres to scripture that all fornication outside marriage is prohibited, it believes that homosexuals are "not being fully the people God intended us to be".

It has sparked an angry response from gay rights campaigners.

The former Europe minister and gay ex-vicar, Chris Bryant MP, said the advert was cruel, particularly to teenagers struggling to come to terms with their sexuality, for promoting the idea that you could become "ex-gay".

"The emotional damage that is done to the individuals who try to suppress their sexuality, the women they marry and the children they might have is immeasurable," he said. "Most sane Christians believe that homosexuality is not a lifestyle or a choice but is a fact to be discovered or not. The pretence that homosexuality is something you can be weaned off in some way is a fundamental misunderstanding of the nature of creation."

Ben Summerskill, the chief executive of Stonewall, said the adverts were clearly homophobic and added: "The only reason some gay people might want to stop being gay is because of the prejudice of the people who are publishing the ad.

"The promotion of this voodoo therapy is hugely irresponsible given the damage that it appears to do to some people."

Attempts to "treat" or alter sexual orientation have been strongly condemned by leading medical organisations. The Royal College of Psychiatrists has warned that "so-called treatments of homosexuality create a setting in which prejudice and discrimination flourish" and concluded in 2010 that "there is no sound evidence that sexual orientation can be changed". The British Medical Association has also attacked "conversion therapy", a related field to reparation therapy, passing a motion asserting that it is "discredited and harmful to those 'treated' ".

Rose said therapies endorsed by Anglican Mainstream and Core Issues were not coercive and stressed that they are appropriate for people who want to change their sexual attractions, for example if they are married and are worried about the impact of a gay lifestyle on their children.

"Reparative therapy works to help men, who want to change their sexual orientation, naturally dissipate their homoerotic feelings and maximise their heterosexual potential," she said.

In a statement, Anglican Mainstream and Core Issues said Stonewall's slogan is "merely another attempt to close down the critical debate about being gay, and marriage 'equality' ". They accused Stonewall of riding roughshod over individuals who chose to "move out of homosexuality".

The statement continued: "Both organisations recognise the rights of individuals to identify as gay, and to live according to their own values. But by the same token, they believe individuals – such as married men and women unhappy with their homosexuality – should be supported in developing their heterosexual potential where this is the appropriate life choice for them … Current scientific research says there is no gay gene and that sexuality is far more fluid than has hitherto been thought."

Your Vagina Isn't Just Too Big, Too Floppy, and Too Hairy—It's Also Too Brown

2012-04-12T13:02:00.001+01:00

Good news, ladies! Society has discovered another new thing that's wrong with you, which means another opportunity for you to make yourself more attractive for your man. Score! Turns out, the color of your vagina is gross and everyone hates it. So bleach that motherfucker. Bleach it right now! In this commercial for an Indian product called Clean and Dry Intimate Wash, a (very light-skinned) couple sits down for what would have been a peaceful cup of morning coffee—if the woman's disgusting brown vagina hadn't ruined everything! The dude can't even bring himself look at her. He can't look at his coffee either, because it only reminds him of his wife's dripping, coffee-brown hole! Fortunately, the quick-thinking woman takes a shower, scrubbing her swarthy snatch with Clean and Dry Intimate Wash ("Freshness + Fairness"). And poof! Her vadge comes out blinding white like a downy baby lamb (and NOT THE GROSS BLACK KIND) and her husband—whose penis, I can only assume, is literally a light saber—is all, "Hey, lady! Cancel them divorce papers and LET'S BONE." Needless to say, certain citizens are troubled by this product—which, in addition to just being fucking insane, brings up painful issues about the hierarchy of skin tone within the Indian community. As if it isn't bad enough that darker-skinned people are encouraged to stay out of the sun and invest in skin-bleaching products like Fair & Lovely, and that white actresses are being imported to play Indian people in Bollywood movies, now everyone has to be insecure about the fact that their vaginas happen to be the color that vaginas are??? Splendid! God, I was just saying the other day that my misogyny didn't have enough racism in it. So what are the pro-vadge-bleaching people thinking? Here's a hilarious explanation from a male ad exec: It is hard to deny that fairness creams often get social commentators and activists all worked up. What they should do is take a deep breath and think again. Lipstick is used to make your lips redder, fairness cream is used to make you fairer-so what's the problem? I don't think any Youngistani today thinks the British Raj/White man is superior to us Brown folk. That's all 1947 thinking! The only reason I can offer for why people like fairness, is this: if you have two beautiful girls, one of them fair and the other dark, you see the fair girl's features more clearly. This is because her complexion reflects more light. I found this amazing difference when I directed Kabir Bedi, who is very fair and had to wear dark makeup for Othello, the Black hero of the play. I found I had to have a special spotlight following Kabir around the stage because otherwise the audience could not see his expressions. See? It makes perfect sense. We just want our vaginas to reflect more light—is that so wrong? I mean, WHAT IF MY CAR BREAKS DOWN AT NIGHT AND I DON'T HAVE A REFLECTIVE ENOUGH VAGINA? Really, the ultimate one-vagina-to-rule-them-all would glow in the dark like one of those deep-sea fishes. I need my vagina to attract more krill so my husband will fuck me again! (My husband is a whale.) Basically the idea is to get as far away as possible from any color that vaginas actually come in. Because that's what's at the heart of this type of thinking—the perfect vagina would be something that's not a vagina at all.

thank each and every one of you, every beautiful person in the building, every legend, every historical human being. You know, every future legend in the building, man.

2012-04-12T09:50:00.001+01:00

Man. I love y’all, man. I hope this table don’t fall and everything stays smooth. First off, NYU I want to say I love you. And thank each and every one of you, every beautiful person in the building, every legend, every historical human being. You know, every future legend in the building, man. I’m in the building with the future. Y’all going to be helping me when things get hard for me. That’s what I hope. I hope everybody leaves this conversation together feeling like family. This is not everybody listening to me, this is everybody is a part of it. If you feel compelled to say something in your heart, please do, because at the end of the day we all have something to teach, and we all have something to say. I want to come to this with a story that I feel symbolizes everybody in the building. This happened to me two days ago. I’m going to the gas station and this older guy—he looks like he’s about 70. Me generalizing and stereotyping, I asked him, “Yo, excuse me sir, how you doing? What has changed for you in the last years? From like when you was younger until now?” And he was like, “You really wanna know?” And I was like, “Yes, sir, I really want to know.” And he was like, “You know what has changed?” And he was like, “Your attitude.” And that was deep, bro! That was deep! I feel that represents us all of us today. I thank y’all for not judging me and being able to respect us being humans. That’s what we should all be able to do. I specialize in love. A lot of people wonder, the small majority who don’t understand wonder why Lil B would be here. But you know, it’s good. I love to spread love, you know. That’s what I’m here to do. This is the big thing I want to speak on to set the tone: Nobody in this building asked to be born. You didn’t ask to be you, bro. I didn’t ask to be me. I didn’t ask to have this skin. I didn’t ask to be who I was, bro. Nobody in here asked that. The beautiful people? Your beautiful parents made you, bro. You didn’t ask for that. You didn’t ask to live where you live or anything. So when you see people, forgive them and accept, you feel me? You gotta open your mind and say, man, nobody asked to be born. Life is hard, kinda. Ay, bruh, I love you positively. I love all y’all. With relationships and women and being together and everybody, man, it’s just like… It’s just real. I’m just happy you guys are getting the real me. No pen, no pad. I didn’t script a speech. I come here and all I can do is be myself and spread love. But with relationships and stuff man, I’m just taking it slow. Taking it easy. A lot of things are happening real fast and I’m just taking my time and respecting women, respecting others. I mean, but that’s obvious, though. To respect women is obvious, yo. And a big thing I’ve been thinking about is the tone with a lot of people I meet and the media, I see it’s a lot of: If you get hit, you hit back. Why is that? Real recognize real, bro. You get blessed out of situations. I did that situation because I wanted the world to see that you can have a million stones thrown at you and you can still be positive. You know, that was kind of embarrassing. I had a lot of hood credibility [makes quotation marks in the air]. I had a lot of imaginary hood respect. But you know, at the end of the day, it’s no respect in being violent or a coward for no reason. It’s no honor in picking on people. It’s no honor in senseless violence. It’s no honor in war. But at the end of the day, I look at animals and insects. You know I’m the first rapper to adopt a tabby cat. You know I adopted straight from the ASPCA, you feel me? Just breaking the boundaries, man, showing everybody it’s okay to be yourself. Embrace yourself. Embrace your health. Ayyy! Just continue to love yourself and accept. I can’t lie, when I was younger I loved the media. I believed the media. I can say I was a product of my environment. You know, you grow up. I remember when I was younger, I didn’t know how to walk. I was so young, I was wondering how I was walking. Am I walking weird? Something’s in my butt? You know what I mean? But really so conscious, though. So hard on myself. And I say through time and love it’s just easing up on yourself, easing up on life. It’s a lot of words people have given so much power. When I mean things to be specific, it’s that tone of you hit me I hit you. That’s not right. The new generation as I see it, how I hold my integrity, why I conduct myself in the way I do—people see me and they say, “He didn’t retaliate or taunt that man, and he could have.” There are people that love me. People were upset. But just because somebody wants to fight you for no reason, or because somebody says something to you, you can forgive that person. I’d be that guy’s friend. You’ve gotta move on and be positive. We’re way past dwelling. I spread that love. Keep it and don’t be hard on yourself with anything, how you look to your weight to wanting to complete what your parents want you to be. Don’t stress so hard. Pat yourself on the back. You’re at NYU. Congratulations. What you guys are doing is very brave. Everybody that is going through school, you’ve made a huge sacrifice. All the staff, all the beautiful students, everybody that’s here to teach. Shouts out to everybody that’s here for learning and love and trying to find their way. I mean, shit. I mean, shoot. We’re all trying to find our way. I want to thank you for embracing and accepting me, like really. I love you. I want to show: have friends of all creeds, all colors, all races. Stop saying, black, white, this, that—we’re all human. Now I don’t know everything. This is my philosophy. But I feel like things are just generalizations. Drop all that. Stop giving negative words so much power. Instead of saying, “Hey, look at him, he’s black,” just say, “Hey, where are you from? What is your nationality?” Just take two seconds instead of generalizing, because, I promise you, I looked up what black means online, and black means something like coal, you feel me? We all got problems too, bro, real talk. We all can have something that we can relate to. Make sure you can relate and have a common. And if you do feel too different, make sure you respect the people. Give people a chance to come in your heart. I know why a lot of people don’t trust people. You know why? There’s a lot of mean, bad people out here. A lot of people don’t have a value on their own life. They don’t have a value on how blessed we are to be alive. Our generation right here, we’re on a class of earth together. This is our class. All of us are going to be like, “Hey, remember 20 years ago when we did that?” Don’t be hard on each other. Let your friends have fun. Work hard and do what you do because we’ve only got one life to live. That is scary, you know. It’s scary and it’s really real, it’s really true. It just makes me appreciate people. Appreciate every single person. Look at them like a golden, million-dollar baby. Ay, bruh, I’ma tell you the real secrets of life, bruh. Ay, bruh, feel me, bruh, I got the real secrets. For real, bro. For real. Real talk: the secrets of life? Look at everybody like they’re a baby. Remember like, man, we’re young. Don’t be so hard on people. We’re just little baby insects or mammals or whatever. You feel me? I tell you, bruh, I was looking at insects. I do my observations when I go out. If I become a neurosurgeon or I’m about to come into some bugs, I’m rocking. With the bugs, man, you just be looking at them. Because I was having these big ant problems in my house. It was crazy. And these are people in their own way, too. As I was studying these ant colonies infesting my house daily, I’m not kidding you, I left food out and 20 minutes later r-r-r-r-r and I’m like, man, they already know! They get it down pat! And real talk, like, seeing these ants and studying them and respecting them, it’s like, man, they’re in their own community too. They’re trying to survive. They love. They fight. They telling themselves something. We can’t understand, but one day we will. I’m trying hard to figure it out. I’m there with them. We’re very smart animals, you know, or whatever we are. Organisms? What are we? What do y’all think we are? Is there like a fact? Does anybody have any proof what we are? Live that life, experience it, travel, and come up with your theories man. Read the books, too, but experience your own. It’s crazy. Some of the things I think about on the daily: I just want my people to be safe. [Audience member: "What you think about, bro?!"] Safety, man. And real talk, everybody make sure you wear seat belts, for real.

Relationship Intimacy in the Age of Social Media

2012-04-06T10:36:00.001+01:00

These days, virtually everyone owns a computer, smart-phone, or mobile device. Digital interaction is an integral part of our everyday routine. We check emails and texts, update our Facebook page, fire off a tweet or two, and then finish our morning coffee. Digital interconnectivity provides endless new opportunities to support our very human need for community and social interaction. Innovations like Facebook, with over 500 million users, and Twitter, with over 300 million users, now allow real-time interactions with an increasingly wider and more diverse group of people. Best of all, friends and family too distant for regular contact just a few years ago can now be intimately folded into our lives. We make friends, we share our experiences, we celebrate, and we commiserate – one world, a growing interactive community. For partners, spouses, and families separated for long periods of time by work or military service, the tech-connect boom is a godsend. Couples, children, and parents are now able to bond long-distance in real time, sharing a growing child’s latest milestone, and even engaging in visual intimacy via the webcams now routinely incorporated into computers and smart-phones. And those not yet in a committed relationship can put technology to good use when home or traveling via e-dating, establishing and growing budding relationships with less of a focus on who lives where. Poke Me? For those unfamiliar with the term “poke,” allow me to enlighten you. In the online social media world of Facebook there is a button that allows you to poke someone. When you poke them, an icon appears on their Facebook page letting them know they’ve been poked, and by whom. The purpose of a virtual poke is the same as that of a real-world poke – to get someone’s attention without actually having to say anything, or, in the case of Facebook, write anything. If you’ve been poked, it means someone is thinking about you, likes you, thinks you’re a good person, thinks you’ve got a great new haircut, or whatever. It also means they have chosen not to engage you via more time-consuming methods like phoning, texting, emailing, instant messaging, or, heaven forbid, stopping by your house and knocking on the door. So what is a poke worth? Is a poke a meaningful social interaction? I know what you may be thinking, but this is a serious question, especially if you are under 25 and grew up with social media as an ingrained part of your daily interactions. There are other questions, too. Should a virtual relationship grow, as many do, beyond a simple poke? If so, how do you know which ones are healthy to maintain and grow? Can “virtual” intimacy be as healthy as a real-world relationship? Does it mean as much when Facebook reminds someone of your birthday as it does when someone actually remembers your birthday? These questions are particularly important for those already struggling with Internet or “real-life” social or intimacy deficits. Generally speaking, healthy, successful relationships of all stripes involve: Physical affection, such as hugging, kissing, and embracing Respect, shown by taking an active interest in others, having empathy for their challenges, and championing their successes Offering support and lending a helping hand when needed, giving advice when asked, and providing unexpected acts of kindness Quality time devoted to evolving our connection to those we care about Valuing, validating, and recognizing who another person is and what they bring to the table In at least a few of these areas, social media comes up short. Clearly there is no virtual equivalent to the warmth of a loving embrace, kiss, or intimate touch – though no doubt we will come to physically experience our loved ones’ embraces via electronic media in the days to come. It is also more challenging, though not impossible, to be a fully empathic listener and advisor online, as Internet interactions lack the full range of feedback that comes in the physical presence of another person (though webcams can help). As for quality time, research shows a mirror relationship between the increased use of technology and decreased levels of quality interpersonal interaction – even among family members. Facebook may just be the new television in this regard. Face-hooked? Perhaps it is no surprise that seemingly benign social media sites like Facebook can become problematic for those predisposed to compulsive, impulsive and addictive behavior. Social media sites have, in fact, become a new (and socially acceptable) place to peruse intimate photos, gain personal information, seek out hot chats, and hook up for virtual or in-person sexual encounters. Self-identified relationship and sexual addicts increasingly describe these networks as a primary location where they routinely “find themselves” lost in an obsessive search for sexual and/or romantic intensity. Consider Janelle, a 29-year-old housewife and mother of two young boys, who takes great pride in being a good mom and having married an engaged and loving man. Sadly, Janelle grew up in an emotionally abusive, addictive family, a situation that lead to her losing much of her early adult life to active drug and alcohol addiction. Thankfully, after several years of involvement and hard work in therapy and AA, Janelle got sober and remained so for nearly seven years. Recently though, feeling beyond bored and stuck at home with no one to talk to other than two toddlers, Janelle discovered Facebook. Initially she gratefully utilized this new media outlet to reconnect with old high school friends and distant family while at home with her kids. But one day – out of the blue – she received a poke and follow-up email from an attractive man she’d never met, asking her to chat online. This simple communication triggered a cascade of unanticipated excitement she’d not felt since prior to getting sober. Within a few weeks Janelle was impatiently waiting for her husband to leave each day so she could go online and connect. Within a few months she found herself involved in a string of online affairs, distracted from parenting and having strong fantasies of hooking-up with some of her new online buddies. A year and several anonymous sexual encounters later, Janelle relapsed with alcohol and cocaine while having a sexual encounter with a stranger met online. Today Janelle is in gender separate treatment for co-occurring addictions at The Ranch in Tennessee, working hard to understand how once again her life got away from her. Social Interaction: Reformatted Most people are familiar with Facebook. Twitter, however, is a newer form of social media that has taken the digital world by storm. On Twitter, users send social messages or “micro-blogs” up to 140 characters long. These messages are known as “tweets.” Tweets are read by “followers.” Followers are to Twitter what “friends” are to Facebook. Like it or not, Facebook, Twitter, and related social media have already begun to irrevocably shift age-old paradigms of social (and cultural) interaction. For those whose lives have become deeply entwined in social media, feelings of self-worth can be tied to the number of Facebook friends and/or Twitter followers they have. In therapy, they report feeling their emotional stability and self-esteem wax and wane in direct relation to how these virtual communities and individuals respond to each carefully phrased post and tweet. Losing a Twitter follower or having your numbers go down can feel devastating for some – the meaning of which can be undervalued or completely missed by an otherwise well-meaning clinician who is not well-versed in these media. Consequently, individuals suffering from depression or anxiety often find their conditions exacerbated by online interaction. And many an intimate relationship has ended badly because of one partner’s poor online boundaries and/or social media driven sexual acting out. Perhaps it is time to consider a few social media guidelines: For those in intimate partnerships it may well be worth utilizing a joint social media account. Sharing one online world will likely lead to lively discussions about how the couple mutually experiences social media. This can bring the pair together not only physically, but emotionally. They can jointly decide who to be friends with, what pages to like, who to follow, and what they want to communicate to the world about their lives together. This can also help reduce the fear that one or the other partner might be cyber-straying while on an individual account. Parents of young children and teens should strongly consider a joint or family social media account for reasons similar to those above and the fact that this can serve as a healthy way to monitor a child’s online interaction. Individuals concerned about their online vulnerability to sexual or romantic overtures should consider a commitment to only friending (adding people to their social network) people they already know and like in the real world. Facebook and social media accounts can readily be set up to allow interactions only with previously known individuals. And, by the way, the competition to see who can amass the most Internet friends is over. Lady Gaga and Oprah won. End of story. For those who sadly evaluate their Twitter follower numbers as if Twitter was a social stock market, it is best to be reminded that Twitter is about building community with like-minded people and exploring the lives of others without governmental or media influence. Unless you utilize Twitter for business purposes, who cares how many people follow you? What matters is what the people you follow have to say and how the people who follow you respond to your thoughts and experience. By taking this stance, the twitterverse becomes a place of social engagement and enlightenment rather than a high-school-like popularity contest. Don’t discuss or air any relationship or personal problems on Facebook or Twitter. Ever. If you’re struggling with your spouse or a friend, discuss it with them directly, or in therapy, or with a member of the clergy, or in some other suitable non-social media venue. A good filter for what to and what not to post is the following: if these are ideas or images you would not want associated with you on your local evening news, then these ideas or images are not appropriate for social media. If you’re sick of social media, experiencing information overload, or your involvement online is a source of ongoing anxiety or despair, QUIT. Try interacting with friends and loved ones in person. You might just find that while you were busy online they actually missed you. Ultimately, social media can enrich, enliven, and enlighten nearly every area of our lives from cooking tips to the Arab Spring. Maintaining contact with far-away friends and family, learning about new and interesting topics, and sharing our opinions and expertise are wonderful things. But social media has not as yet found a way to replace or fully replicate the social, physical, and relationship needs that are met when we engage face to face. A healthy life requires balance, and an overdose of social media for an extended period can bring about unnecessary emotional, financial, relationship, and career consequences. Robert Weiss is the author of three books on sexual addiction and Founding Director of the premiere sex addiction treatment program, The Sexual Recovery Institute. He is Director of Sexual Disorders Services at The Ranch and Promises Treatment Centers. These centers serve individuals seeking sexual addiction treatment, love addiction treatment, and porn addiction help. Specifically, the Centers for Relationship and Sexual Recovery at The Ranch (CRSR) offer specialized intimacy, sex and relationship addiction treatment for both men and women in gender-specific, gender-separate treatment and living environments.

Food Can Be Addictive, Says Dr. Nora Volkow, Director of the National Institute on Drug Abuse

2012-04-06T10:19:00.001+01:00

Can food really be as addictive as drugs? In an impassioned lecture at Rockefeller University on Wednesday, Dr. Nora Volkow, director of the National Institute on Drug Abuse, made the case that the answer is yes and that understanding the commonalities between food and drug addictions could offer insights into all types of compulsive behavior. Volkow began by acknowledging that the idea is controversial. “This is a concept that is rejected by many people,” she said. “It has polarized the [addictions] field.” Many experts dismiss food as an addictive substance because it doesn’t lead to most people behaving like addicts — compulsively seeking food despite negative consequences. So, the reasoning goes, food can’t be as addictive as a drug like crack cocaine. What that fails to recognize, however, is that crack cocaine itself isn’t as addictive as is commonly believed. “If you look at people who take drugs, the majority are not addicted,” Volkow said. Indeed, even for drugs like crack and heroin, fewer than 20% of users become addicted. In contrast, if you look at the proportion of people who are currently obese — some 34% of adults over 20 — it’s a significantly larger group. Add in those who are overweight, and fully two-thirds of Americans clearly have significant difficulties controlling their food intake. So, measured by the proportion of those who behave in health-risking ways with each substance, food could actually be considered several times more “addictive” than crack.

Eating Berries Could Guard Men Against Parkinson's

2012-04-06T10:16:00.001+01:00

Eating strawberries, blueberries, blackcurrants and blackberries, which are rich in flavonoids, could reduce the risk of Parkinson's disease in men, finds a research. Men who ate the fruits along with other foods rich in flavonoids were found to be 40 percent less likely to develop the brain disease, Daily Mail reported Thursday. And those who ate berries at least once a week could cut their risk of developing the disease by a quarter compared with those who never ate them, the study by British and US experts has found. Flavonoids - also found in tea and red wine - are antioxidants which can offer protection against diseases like heart disease, some cancers and dementia. The research is the first large-scale study looking at the effect of flavonoids in protecting against Parkinson's disease. It causes tremors and muscular rigidity or stiffness, and affects all kinds of movement in the body. Xiang Gao of Harvard School of Public Health, one of the study leaders, said: "Given the other potential health effects of berry fruits, such as lowering risk of hypertension as reported in our previous studies, it is good to regularly add these fruits to your diet."

New info about statin safety affects millions

2012-04-04T07:12:00.001+01:00

U.S. Food and Drug Administration issued new safety information about these cholesterol-lowering drugs that are prescribed to millions of Americans to lower the risk of heart disease. If you're among them, you should understand what the FDA's new guidance means for your health. "Before anyone gets too concerned, you should know that statins are so widely used because they have a long track record of safety and effectiveness," says Dr. Mark Taber, a cardiologist with SSM Heart Institute at St. Joseph Health Center. "All in all, statins have a very high benefit to risk ratio.Â The widespread use of the drugs, when indicated, probably accounts to a significant degree for the improvement in life expectancy in this country." The FDA called attention to the threat of liver damage as a rare side effect of statins and advised that regular liver enzyme testing is no longer considered useful in predicting or preventing liver injury. "Actually, in general they liberalized the follow up needed for liver function tests on patients taking statins, due to the very low incidence of true liver issues," Taber says. The main warnings related to a slightly higher incidence of developing diabetes while on statins, and a poorly substantiated claim that statins could result in cognitive impairment. Taber points out that cognitive problems, such as confusion or memory problems, were not documented in clinical studies, only by patient reports to the FDA website. "By stating these concerns, the FDA is raising awareness about the potential side effects of statins, but cardiologists already know that there are inherent risks, and we monitor patients appropriately to help ensure that side effects do not occur or are dealt with quickly," Taber notes. "If there is any evidence of a side effect that could be problematic, we can change the medication. But the fact remains that it's important to decrease risk of heart disease, and for many people statins are needed when diet and exercise alone don't result in acceptable cholesterol levels." Whenever a new prescription medication is started, you should look over the package insert to learn about potential side effects. Signs of liver damage, for instance, include fatigue, loss of appetite, right upper abdominal pain, dark urine and jaundice. Any of these symptoms should be reported to your doctor for evaluation. It is important to remember that you should not stop taking a medication without consulting your doctor first. Discontinuing use of a prescribed drug can be far more dangerous than the side effect you're worried about. "All the side effects listed by the FDA are rare, and the risk of heart attack is far more concerning," Taber says. "Some patients may need extra monitoring or may need to try more than one statin before we find the optimal choice, but in general statins are very well tolerated and don't cause problems for the people who take them." The advice above is universal when it comes to your health. Concerns should be discussed with your doctor, and decisions should always be made as part of a team approach to creating a healthy life.

Why don't GPS warn you that statins can harm your memory?

2012-04-04T07:04:00.001+01:00

John Holliday had been on a higher 40mg dose of cholesterol pills for only a few weeks when he started to lose his concentration. ‘I’d be watching TV and suddenly find myself unable to follow the plot of a drama,’ says John, 52, a telecoms project manager who lives in Southend-on-Sea, Essex, with his wife Jill, 51, and their two children Adam, 20, and Emma, 16. ‘I’d have to read the same page of a book over and over because I couldn’t take any information in. ‘I’d always been known for my amazing memory — I was great on trivia and had total recall of events that happened 20 years ago, but suddenly I couldn’t remember things and my brain felt fuzzy.’ Just like up to seven million other people in Britain, John had been prescribed a statin to lower his blood cholesterol levels. The drugs are credited by the British Heart Foundation as contributing towards the dramatic 50 per cent fall in deaths from heart attacks in the past ten years. But while there is consensus that statins are lifesavers for people who have previously had a heart attack, concern is growing over their debilitating side-effects. They include muscle weakness, depression, sleep disturbance, sexual dysfunction, muscle pain and damage, gastro-intestinal problems, headaches, joint pains and nausea. Now, official bodies here and in the U.S. have ordered that the drugs must carry warnings for cognitive problems, too. Worryingly, it’s claimed GPs are failing to warn patients of the effect statins can have on the mind — meaning they may mistake them for signs of ageing or Alzheimer’s. ‘When I went back to my doctor after six weeks for a blood test, I told him how dreadful I was feeling,’ says John. ‘But he just said all drugs had side-effects and didn’t mention reducing the dose.’ It's claimed GPs are failing to warn patients of the effect statins can have on the mind - meaning they may mistake them for signs of ageing or Alzheimer's Things came to a head when a friend showed John an electrical circuit he’d built for his car. ‘I’d worked with circuits since I was 16 but it made no sense,’ he says. So John insisted on seeing his doctor again and repeated his concerns about his rapidly declining memory. This time the GP told him he could start on another type of statin when he felt well enough, and so John stopped taking the drugs immediately. ‘It took a few months, but gradually my memory returned and I’ve got my concentration back. I can’t say for sure statins caused these problems, but it seems like too much of a coincidence.’ Earlier this year, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) in the U.S. ordered statins must carry warnings that some users have reported cognitive problems including memory loss, forgetfulness and confusion. This followed a decision by the UK’s Medicines Healthcare Regulatory Agency (MHRA) to add memory problems to the list of possible statin side-effects in late 2009. The FDA said reports about the symptoms were from across all statin products and age groups. Those affected reported feeling fuzzy or unfocused in their thought process — though these were found to be rare and reversible. The FDA also warned, following U.S. research, that patients on statins had a small excess risk of developing Type 2 diabetes — but stressed that the benefits of taking a statin still outweigh this. The MHRA had 2,675 reports for adverse drug reactions connected with statins between 2007 and 2011. Officially, side-effects are rare —affecting only 1 per cent of people on the pills — but some doctors say they are under-reported. Dr Malcolm Kendrick, a GP and author of The Great Cholesterol Con, says he frequently sees patients suffering from mental confusion in his job in hospital intermediary care for the elderly. ‘Many of the patients I see will have been admitted to hospital after a fall or similar crisis,’ he says. ‘If they appear confused I’ll often advise taking them off statins to see if it has any effect — in my experience, about 10 to 15 per cent of people who appeared to have memory problems experienced an improvement in their memory symptoms after being taken off the drug. ‘I had one dramatic case where a lady was admitted to hospital on 40mg a day of simvastatin with such poor memory function her family asked me about power of attorney. 'I suggested taking her off statins and within a week her memory had returned to normal. She went home a fit and independent 83-year-old.’ Dr Kendrick says cholesterol is the main constituent of synapses (structures that allow signals to pass between brain cells and to create new memories) and is essential for brain function. ‘It is still not proven that statins have a significant effect on mortality — it has been calculated that a man who has had a heart attack who took a statin for five years would extend his life by only 14 days. 'Too many statins are being given to people at low risk. ‘Even in the highest risk group you need to treat 200 people a year with statins to delay just one death. 'One day the harm these drugs are doing is going to be obvious — the benefits are being over-hyped and the risks swept under the carpet.’ While Dr Kendrick’s controversial view is in the minority, one large review of 14 studies by the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine, published by the highly respected Cochrane Library last year, concluded there was ‘little evidence’ cholesterol-lowering drugs protect people who are not at risk of heart disease. This review has been criticised by other doctors who say side-effects are rare and that there are still benefits even for people at lower risk who do not have established heart disease. These defenders of statins include Professor Colin Baigent of the Clinical Trial Service at Oxford University, who published research in 2010 showing statins reduced deaths from all causes by 10 per cent over five years. ‘There is relatively little evidence of cognitive impairment — what evidence there is all comes from observational studies. ‘People read about side-effects and then put two and two together and blame the statins for their muscle pain or other health problems — it’s just not reliable evidence. ‘If you look at the best-quality randomised controlled trial where patients don’t know if they are taking a statin or placebo, there is no evidence of memory problems. 'Even the FDA says the risks of cognitive problems are very small and go away when statins are discontinued. ‘We’re in danger of forgetting just how effective these drugs are.’ Dr Dermot Neely of the charity Heart UK, and lead consultant at the Lipid and Metabolic Clinic at the Royal Victoria Infirmary in Newcastle, agrees side-effects with statins are rare. ‘I’ve been dealing with patients on statins since 1987 and I can count on the fingers of one hand the number whose memory symptoms turned out to be caused by statins.’ However, he said he often saw patients who had not been told about side-effects. ‘It’s important GPs are clear about the drugs statins can interact with, such as certain antibiotics, as this can get overlooked. ‘If a patient notices an adverse effect after starting statins, they should discuss this with their GP —but not stop their drugs suddenly because this can be dangerous.’ Sonya Porter, 73, decided to stop taking statins after her memory problems became so bad that she walked away from a cashpoint leaving her money behind. ‘I was permanently fuzzy-headed and just couldn’t seem to concentrate,’ says Sonya, a retired PA from Woking, Surrey. Then I started to get scared I might have Alzheimer’s. After reading about memory problems associated with statins, I thought it was at least a possibility. I decided to come off the pills to see if it made any difference. ‘I didn’t ask my GP, I just did it — I’d rather die of a heart attack than Alzheimer’s disease. Within a month I felt normal again and didn’t have any problems with memory. ‘I’m terrified that I could have been misdiagnosed with Alzheimer’s.’ John Holliday is also reluctant to go back on statins. ‘I wouldn’t rule it out completely — my latest test showed my cholesterol levels have gone up,’ he says. ‘But on balance, I’d rather take my chances with heart disease than feel as confused as that again. It’s all very well living slightly longer — but it’s about quality of life, too.’

Facebook App Lets You Add Enemies Online

2012-03-27T08:00:00.001+01:00

Forget friending. A new Facebook app allows users of the social network to identify and share people, places and things as “enemies” for all to see. The app, called EnemyGraph, lets you list anything with a Facebook presence — ranging from “friends,” to foods, to products, movies or books — as an enemy. Since the app launched March 15, it’s seemed to appeal especially to users with a liberal bent. Some of its most-selected nemeses so far include Rick Santorum, Westboro Baptist Church and Fox News. The app was developed by a professor and two students at the University of Texas at Dallas. Dean Terry, who directs the school’s emerging media program, helped conceptualize the project, while graduate student Bradley Griffith and undergraduate Harrison Massey built the app. Griffith said EnemyGraph has so far accumulated some 400 users. But more importantly, its creators say, press coverage has helped meet the team’s goal of sparking a larger conversation about the nature of social media and Facebook in particular. “One thing that has always struck me is the enforced niceness culture,” Terry told Mashable. “We wanted to give people a chance to express dissonance as well. We’re using the word enemy about as accurately as Facebook uses the word friend.” But the app has utility beyond simply sparking a philosophical debate, Terry adds. Researchers and marketers have long gathered information on social media users based on what they support, but at the expense of possibly overlooking another valuable data source. “You can actually learn a lot about people by what they’re upset about and what they don’t like,” Terry says. “And the second thing is that if you and I both don’t like something, that actually creates a social bond that hasn’t been explored in social media at all, except with Kony and some big examples like that.” Terry and Griffith teamed up last year to create Undetweetable, a service allowing Twitter users’ deleted tweets to be uncovered posthumously. That project gained some attention as well but Twitter quickly forced it to shut down. Terry wouldn’t be surprised if EnemyGraph meets a similar fate from Facebook. “My guess is it goes against their social philosophy and purpose,” he says. “It is a critique of their social philosophy for sure.” Do you like the EnemyGraph idea? Let us know in the comments.

socially disruptive narcissists More Facebook Friends You Have, the More Unhappy You Are

2012-03-26T10:41:00.001+01:00

A study has discovered a direct link between the number of friends you have on Facebook and how much of a “socially disruptive narcissist” you are—giving us one more reason to tone down our Facebook addictions. Researchers at Western Illinois studied 294 college students and found that those with more friends on Facebook tended to score higher on the Narcissistic Personality Inventory questionnaire. They tended to respond more aggressively to comments, change their profile pictures more often, and updated their news feeds more regularly than others. This may not be all that surprising, but it does provide a bit of motivation to re-evaluate what Facebook does for you, if you fit into one of these categories (and if not, at least you can stop feeling bad about not having very many Facebook friends—it’s probably a good thing). None of this is to say Facebook is inherently bad, of course. It’s still a great way to keep in touch with family and friends, especially after you’ve fixed all of its annoyances—you might just want to dial back on all the photo tagging. While you’re at it, you can also move some of those friends to your Acquaintances list using Facebook’s new tool, which will hide them from your news feed more often.

Beware Referral Agencies

2012-02-08T14:14:00.002Z

Have you or one of your family members visited the website of an organisation or individual claiming to offer independent and free advice about addiction treatment?

Have you or one of your family members been contacted by an organisation or individual offering to negotiate your treatment costs?

Be aware! There is a very common, unethical practice of clinics paying to be recommended by referral agents.

Castle Craig stands side-by-side with other established treatment clinics who do not pay any bribes to referral agencies or disreputable sources to get patients.

If you seek your addiction treatment through a referral agency you are unlikely to be offered some of the best treatment options available and may end up paying their commission fees.

Some commission agents secretly have their own clinics and sell their own treatment services, while pretending to be “independent”.

Referral agents can be stakeholders in clinics, at the same time as offering "independent" advice without this interest and bias being declared to the patient.

This practice is illegal in most U.S. states.

We wish to make our website users aware of this practice so that they can make properly informed decisions about their health.

How to Embark on a Spiritual Journey

2012-02-07T17:13:00.001Z

It’s much easier to coast through life on the surface without ever diving beneath to see down into the dark blue depths. But if we choose to ignore that there is more to life than the daily rush, and the hoarding of possessions – what happens when we come smack up against suffering? When we get ill, or someone we love leaves or dies, or when we near the end or our life (which could be at any time)? If we’ve just coasted through life without going into the depths, we’ll feel disorientated and lost – without any mental or spiritual resources to help us deal with suffering. The spiritual journey gives us resources to deal with adversity. The spiritual journey helps us to understand what our challenges are, and how to overcome them. In this post we’ll look at the beginning stage of a spiritual journey. Of course each journey is unique, but there are certain factors that all spiritual journeys have in common. Joseph Campbell wrote a book The Hero With a Thousand Faces in which he describes the archetypal steps of the hero’s journey. The spiritual journey shows a similar structure.

How to Embark on a Spiritual Journey

2012-02-07T11:03:00.001Z

How to Embark on a Spiritual Journey

Embarking on the spiritual journey is like getting into a very small boat and setting out on the ocean to search for unknown lands. ~ Pema Chodron

Can You Come to Jesus Without Church?

2012-01-20T09:42:00.001Z

YouTube videos go viral all the time, but sermons rarely do. Enter Jefferson Bethke, a young "spoken-word" poet who recently posted the video "Why I Hate Religion, But Love Jesus." It has been viewed more than 10 million times in the past 10 days. The video opens with an eerie soundtrack and the phrase "Jesus>Religion" in a stark, white typeface. His poem begins, "What if I told you, Jesus came to abolish religion?" In a polished, hip style, he continues with such controversial questions for four minutes: "If religion is so great, why has it started so many wars? Why does it build huge churches, but fails to feed the poor?" Mr. Bethke describes religion as no more than "behavior modification" and "a long list of chores." This leads him to conclude, "Jesus and religion are on opposite spectrums." And his grand finale: "So know I hate religion, in fact I literally resent it." Other YouTube users have posted response videos, and countless bloggers have commented on the quality of his poetry, the sharpness of the production and the errors in his theology. Among the most ardent critics are Catholics who see Catholic-bashing in Mr. Bethke's attack against organized religion, particularly in his suggestion that religion is "just following some rules." On his blog "Bad Catholic," Marc Barnes highlights Mr. Bethke's indictments of religion for building huge churches at the expense of the poor and telling "single Moms God doesn't love them if they've had a divorce." Though Mr. Barnes agrees with some of the poem, he writes, "I can't help but think, in the midst of all this, that this hating-religion-loving-Jesus thing is the logical consequence of Protestantism." Yet the Protestant response has been strong as well. Kevin DeYoung, a blogger at "The Gospel Coalition," a popular Reformed Christian site, wrote that "amidst a lot of true things in this poem there is a lot that is unhelpful and misleading." YouTube A screen shot of Jefferson Bethke in his video 'Why I Hate Religion, But Love Jesus." Mr. Bethke, he notes, "perfectly captures the mood, and in my mind the confusion, of a lot of earnest, young Christians" who interpret the word religion to mean "self-righteousness, moral preening, and hypocrisy." The problem, Mr. DeYoung notes, is this is not what religion is, and Jesus didn't hate religion. Jesus was an observant Jew, Mr. DeYoung points out. Jesus clearly said he didn't come to abolish the law or ignore the prophecies but to fulfill them. In fact he founded the church and instituted the sacrament of communion. Mr. DeYoung is correct to identify Mr. Bethke's sentiment as typical of his generation of young evangelical Christians. The notion that "Christianity is not a religion, but a relationship" has been echoing through the sanctuaries of evangelical, and particularly nondenominational, churches since at least the 1970s. Mr. Bethke's own pastor, Mark Driscoll of Mars Hill Church in Seattle, promotes a distinction between "religious people" and "Jesus people": "Religion is about me" but "Christianity . . . is about Jesus," Mr. Driscoll preached in 2007. As Mr. Barnes of "Bad Catholic" notes, this is a particularly Protestant sentiment that can be traced back to theologian Karl Barth, who often distinguished between "revelation" and religion. This is the kind of Christianity in which I was raised, where a man with a high school degree and a "calling" can lead a congregation, where a pastor can spend millions advertising an apocalypse only he predicted, and where a church burns the Koran and leads to the unnecessary deaths of innocent people halfway across the world. Stating that religions build churches at the expense of the poor, as Mr. Bethke does, turns a blind eye to the single greatest charitable institution on the planet. Blaming religion for wars ignores the fact that the greatest mass murderers in the 20th century—indeed in all of history—killed for nonreligious reasons. And advocating for a kind of Christianity that is free of the "bondage" of religion opens the door to dangerous theological anarchy that is all too common among young evangelicals and absolutely antithetical to biblical Christianity.

To show other alcoholics PRECISELY HOW WE HAVE RECOVERED is the main purpose of this book

2012-01-16T17:11:00.001Z

Alcoholics Anonymous - Our primary purpose.

"Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." page 60

We must be ever vigilant to maintain the purity of our message, "if AA is ever destroyed, it will be from within." Bill Wilson

Do you to want to want to stop?

"If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking, you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic. If that be the case, you may be suffering from an illness which only a spiritual experience will conquer." page 44

We are sober because of the steps we take, not the meetings we make!.

"We, OF Alcoholics Anonymous, are more than one hundred men and women who have recovered from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body. To show other alcoholics PRECISELY HOW WE HAVE RECOVERED is the main purpose of this book"Forward
what happened To the program of recovery That worked so well (a minimum 75% rate of recovery) when AA first started?

12 step organizations working the steps directly from the Big Book :

2012-01-16T17:08:00.001Z


	All Addictions Anonymous: http://www.alladdictionsanonymous.com/
	Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous: http://www.slaafws.org/
	The Big Book Muckers
	AA Primary Purpose: http://www.theprimarypurposegroup.com/
	AA Back To Basics: http://www.aabacktobasics.org/

age of miracles is still with us. Our own recovery proves that!

2010-02-09T19:40:00.001Z

age of miracles is still with us. Our own recovery proves that!

it is a miracle.

2010-02-09T19:40:00.000Z

The capacity to give one's attention to a sufferer is a very rare and
difficult thing; it is almost a miracle; it is a miracle.

Sell your clothes and keep your thoughts. God will see that you do want society.

2010-02-09T19:38:00.000Z

However mean your life is, meet it and live it: do not shun it and call it hard
names. Cultivate poverty like a garden herb, like sage. Do not trouble your-
self much to get new things, whether clothes or friends. Things do not
change, we change. Sell your clothes and keep your thoughts. God will see
that you do want society.

Many of us have wasted a lot of time doing that and it doesn't work. You can easily see why.

2010-02-09T19:37:00.000Z

We usually conclude the period of meditation with a prayer that we be
shown all through the day what our next step is to be, that we be given
whatever we need to take care of such problems. We ask especially for
freedom from self-will, and are careful to make no request for ourselves
only. We may ask for ourselves, however, if others will be helped. We are
careful never to pray for our own selfish ends. Many of us have wasted a
lot of time doing that and it doesn't work. You can easily see why.

READ THIS IT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE

2010-01-31T19:01:00.000Z

Today is a new day. Make the best of it. Don´t fill it with complaints or regrets. Break the cycle and use today to accomplish something.

There will always be a good excuse not to, but excuses don´t bring any fulfilment to your life. Each moment is an opportunity to live and to give. Make it count. Dream big dreams, and follow your dreams with action and commitment. Appreciate, be thankful for, and make the best use of all that you have. You are a unique expression of life and love and creation. Let your life shine brightly. Delight in the obstacles that give you the gift of challenge. Let the beauty that is around you inspire you. Have faith in the ultimate triumph of truth. Break free from your past limitations and become the person you are to be. Look for ways to provide meaning and value to others, and you will soar ever higher. See every moment for the opportunity that it is. Put your life into action. The world is full of promise, and hope, and beauty when you have the courage to look for it, and to find it. Step confidently forward to greet each new day, secure in the knowledge that it is the best day of your life.

rocketed into a

2010-01-30T15:05:00.000Z

We have found much of heaven and we have been rocketed into a

fourth dimension of existence of which we had not even dreamed.

Angels don’t worry about you.

2010-01-26T15:01:00.000Z

Angels don’t worry about you.
They believe in you!

People sometimes ask me if I believe in angels. And yes, I certainly do!

Sometimes they show themselves, sometimes a little white feather comes to you as an angel’s kiss, always leaving you with a warm feeling. Sometimes angel’s answers come through a song other times it is your best friend who starts to talk about something which is worrying you and at other times it is just the lady in front of you in the queue of the supermarket, who makes a comment.

Where to look for angels? How to recognize them?

The following poem says it all:

What do Angels look like?

Like the little old lady who returned

Your wallet yesterday.

Like the taxi driver who told you that your eyes

Light up the world when you smile.

Like the small child who showed you

The wonder in simple things.

Like the poor man who offered to

Share his lunch with you.

Like the rich man who showed you that it

Really is all possible, if only you believe.

Like the stranger who just happened to come along

When you had lost your way.

Like the friend who touched your heart

When you didn’t think you had one to touch.

Angels come in all sizes and shapes,

All ages and skin types and colours.

Some with freckles, some with dimples,

Some with wrinkles, some without.

They come disguised as friends, enemies,

Nurses, teachers, students, lovers and fools.

They don’t take life too seriously.

They travel light.

They leave no forwarding address.

They ask nothing in return.

They wear sneakers with gossamer wings.

They get a deal on dry cleaning.

They are hard to find when your eyes are closed,

But they are everywhere you look,

When you choose to open your eyes and see.

Earth Angels come in all colour sizes and ages. They do not always arrive with a blast of trumpets, feathered wings or a blinding light, but they are angels just the same.

Some mysteriously disappear, others whisper through the door ways of our minds. When this happens we suddenly feel the need to call someone, or do something. We might not always be aware that angels are guiding us, but anyone who raises your spirits and helps you to grow or love is an angel.

Fraser sends you love and light to open your eyes to the angels around you, guiding you through your life, those heavenly messengers are a direct link to our heart and a shortcut to living our true purpose. Dare to listen to their whispers!

Vision is, I think, the ability to make good estimates

2010-01-21T18:07:00.000Z

Vision is, I think, the ability to make good estimates. Some might feel
this sort of striving to be heresy against "One Day At A Time". But
that valuable principle really refers to our mental and emotional lives,
and means chiefly that we are not foolishly to repine over the past nor
wishfully daydream about the future.