The Ultimate Challenge Fantasy League

Week 2 Power Rankings

2012-02-08T17:21:00.000-08:00

All the other Power Rankings logos were for Fantasy Football

Effin Bananas is still the top dog and Gay High School Juniors are still at the bottom. High scorer on the week was Mark Long and Leroy's Shlong with an unheard of 275 points. Also breaking the 200 point barrier was Pup 'N Suds (240) and Swamp Donkeys (225). Biggest riser on the week was the vastly underrated Mark Long's left Pec (10 spots) while the biggest faller was Boots to Assess (7 spots) barely edging out Dunbar is always Watching (6 spots).

1. Effin Bananas (340 points, 68 ppp, 80% of team intact, 0)
Though only third in points per player still the strong favorite to win. After a nice boost from Sarah Rice this team will go as far as the Johnny Cara Maria handcuff can carry it.

2. Pup 'N Suds (335 points, 67 ppp, 80% of team intact, +1)
So far Jasmine and Vinny have carried the load for this team. Mark Long and Paula are veterans who are comfortable coming on strong later so look for them to begin picking up the slack.

3. Mark Long and Leroy's Shlong (340 points, 85 ppp, 50% of team intact, +4)
Rounding out the top 3 due to a monster week 2 (275 points!!!!) this team has no chance to win but does have a nice cushion on some of the lower ranked teams and with Mark Long still left they probably won't drop too far.

4. Casual Molestation (325, 65 ppp, 40% of team intact, 0)
The only team to lose over half of its competitors so far, oddly enough I think they still have a chance to podium as the two guys left are CT and Abram who are both crazy and great competitors, plus neither of them has really scored yet.

5. Mark Long's Left Pec (295 points, 73.75 ppp, 50% of team intact, +10)
It is gonna be tough for this team to podium, but Camilla has been the leading scorer for half the weeks so you can never count them out, they'll greatly miss leading scorer Sarah Rice.

6. Swamp Donkeys (295 points, 59 ppp, 60% of team intact, +4)
Tough loss of Vinny Foti and first round pick Wes Bermann. Fortunately the Swamp Donkeys do have a mild cushion on the rest of the league, if Cara Maria gives us them the performance we know she's capable of a top 10 finish is possible.

Second Tier teams after the jump.

7. Ageless Wonders (195 points, 39 ppp, 100% of team intact, -2)
While a decent bit behind the Swamp Donkeys Ageless Wonders have the best shot of any team to make the jump as its the only squad with over 20 ppp to still be complete. Look for Mark Long and Johnny to lead the way.

8. LeanBodyMovement (165 points, 41.25 ppp, 75% of team intact, 0)
Another team with a decent shot to make the jump to relevancy especially with two verified elimination round beasts in CT and Leroy. Jasmine needs to start hitting more people for them to really make a go of it though.

9. Boots to Asses (130 points, 32.5 ppp, 100% of team intact, -7)
The last team with a good shot of making the jump to the upper echelon, Boots to Assess needs Paula to start crying, yesterday.

10. Twink Squad (150 points, 30 ppp, 80% of team intact, -1)
Solid rookie effort for the twink squad unfortunately they only have two challengers that look poised to be scorers and they just lost one of them to THE DOME. CT is gonna have to eat more than a few faces.

11. Just a Business Relationship (115 points, 24 ppp, 80% of team intact, +1)
Not a bad team on paper it just hasn't developed a personality yet. If Jasmine racks up her crazyness and the rest of the squad follows suit they could move up if not they'll stay right here.

12. Dunbar's Always Watching (60 points, 12 ppp, 80% of team intact, -6)
Biggest bust of the league so far only Leroy and Nate have lived up to expectations. Psychopath Abram has put up a goose egg as has Dunbar the sexual predator, it may be too little too late but this team will improve.

13. Tonya's Titties (70 points, 17.5 ppp, 100% of team intact, -2)
Who would have thought that out of Dunbar, Cara Maria, Aneesa and Tyrie that Tyrie would be the only one on the board? Probably the biggest upset so far.

14. Drama's Wet Dream (30 points, 6 ppp, 100% of team intact, -1)
Call me crazy but I think this team can actually move up, obviously they can't win it but they haven't lost anyone yet Leroy looks good so far and we know that Paula and Aneesa will put up points at some point only time will tell but I'd be shocked if they were this low at the end of the year.

15. Dustin: Pay for Gay (35 points, 8.75 ppp, 100% of team intact, -1)
Another team struggling from Abram's decision to not show up look for them to improve, but how much they can do so is up for debate.

16. Gay High School Juniors (150 points, 30 ppp, 80% of team intact, 0)
This team will never win anything.

Episode 2 Review [UPDATED]

2012-02-02T19:58:00.000-08:00

Leroy Announces there's a new Elimination Bad-Ass

Episode 2 of Battle of the Exes was pretty much non-stop action. When Jasmine hit Tyrie I thought to myself that's the moment of the episode right there, then Mark and Robin took a real nasty tumble off the platform maybe the worst fall on the Challenge since Katie's face-plant on Cutthroat I thought well that was pretty funny could be that. However the producer's at Bunim-Murray knew different and glossed right over it aside from Robin's "my head hurts" comment. That gave us time to maximize all things Vinny. Vinny to be frank killed it both with his sexual assault of Mandi and refusal to back down from his actions to Wes. Finally I thought Leroy might steal the moment with his complete Evisceration of Wes in THE DOME. We probably won't see another episode this good again for awhile, however normal noted crazies like Abram, Cara Maria, CT, TY, Dunbar, Paula, Tyrie and Jasmine have been relatively quite so far so literally anything is in play.

With that lets get into the individual episode recaps

Emily Shromm (0) and Ty Ruff (0):
Quite episode for the pair with nary a confession between them. They looked no worse than anyone else on the Challenge making it to two platforms so look for them to either compete well or begin to splinter in the next few episodes.

Aneesa Ferreira (0) and Rachel Robinson (0):
Quite episode as well for the only all female partnership. They at least each recorded one confessional. Also going for them is that Aneesa danced all over Leroy in a way Naomi won't soon forget. Look for Naomi to get in Aneesa's face about that and verbal arguments to ensue.

Abram Boise (0) and Cara Maria (0):
Yet another couple we didn't hear a lot out of. The highlight of course being Abram offering to coitus Cara Maria to cure her nerves. I expect their screen time to drastically increase with the exit of Vinny and Wes.

Dustin Zito (0) and Heather Marter (0):
This group got a decent amount of screen time with almost no action as they were more the topic of discussion as in are they going in THE DOME. Having to go first was no easy feat but they managed decently well making it through 2 platforms faster than anyone, Zito even suggested on twitter they deserved to go to the Power Couple round. Now that Wes is gone expect them to go into almost every DOME unless Tyrie and Jasmine become intolerable.

Mark Long (0) and Robin Hibbard (0):
The old man is once again biding his time staying above it all before he makes his move. Perhaps the biggest development from the episode going forward is that Mark Long has seemingly taken over Patriarchal duties of the house as he counselled Vinny on Sexual Assault the next morning. This is huge news as last episode the Godfather expressed concern that he didn't really have any friends on the Challenge. Also the took a friggen nasty fall.

Scorers after the jump.
Chris "C.T." Tamburello (5 points) and Diem Brown (5 points):
While their screen this episode was brief I am now more convinced then ever that their story line will be the "A-Plot" for the season. CT is still clearly hurt from his break-up with Diem and frankly I don't blame him for it at all as someone that's lost a family member suddenly I could never forgive someone I thought was close to me not being there for me. Which is what Diem doesn't get and kinda why I've never really liked her she completely lacks empathy everything is always about her.
-5 verbal fighting points each.

Camilla Nakagawa (0) and Johnny Bananas (10 points):
Last weeks high scorer's at 80 points a piece drop way down the standings. After being the only couple to complete this week's immunity Challenge in round 1 they were smoked in the Power Couple round by Vinny and Sarah, though Johnny hinted on twitter they may have tossed this. I wonder if this will become a trend, making it to the Power Couple round and if you know the other couple won't throw you in toss the challenge so you don't make new enemies.
- 10 points for wearing a T-Shirt from your clothing line (Johnny)

Dunbar Flinn (0) and Paula Walnuts (10 points):
Paula and Dunbar have done a pretty good job of working together so far, but I think fireworks are in their picture. Paula was unusually quite on her confessionals, but did manage to get a text from TJ.
-10 points for receiving a text from T.J. (Paula)

Mandi Moyer (60 points) and Wes Bergmann (25 points):
Poor Mandi she shows up to Exes with a new-found level of maturity and desire to stay loyal to her boyfriend despite the considerable charms of Wes and still ends up naked on camera. Unfortunately despite her impressive effort in THE DOME she'll still be heading home a loser. Wes has in recent years become something of a heel to Johnny and Evan's SUCKYEAH Empire (though he sees it differently), but on this episode he was rather noble by attempting to explain to Vinny why he was a big douchebag.
- 5 confessional points for Mandi
- 5 unintended nudity points for Mandi
- 10 confessional points for Wes
- 5 verbal fighting points for Wes
- 10 citation of the shows rules as a reason for not fighting Wes
- 25 "moment of the episode" points Mandi
- 25 physical fighting points Mandi

Leroy Garrett(15 points) and Naomi Defensor(15 points):
If all of THE DOME challenges are like the first two where one person could win it all this team ain't going anywhere. Leroy destroyed Wes in a classic elimination wrestling style match this is the same Wes who beat Derrick Kosinski perhaps the best wrestler in Challenge history. Despite her best efforts Naomi is the weak link of the team props to Leroy for understanding its not her fault thats something him Brad and CT have been really good about in recent years only asking their teammates to give their best. However not all is happy here a Naomi explosion for Leroy looking at a girl here has certainly been foreshadowed enough.
- 5 points each for confessionals
- 10 points each for winning the elimination round

Jasmine Reynaud (30 points) and Tyrie Ballard (60 points):
Everyone knew this was gonna happen Jasmine is really really crazy and that manifested itself last night when she attacked her partner. For awhile it looked like they would go into THE DOME because of their destruction of house harmony, but they were spared for another week, we'll see if that happens again next week. Tyrie had perhaps his strongest Challenge episode sealed when he pulled his pants down and had the definitive quote of the episode with "Damn, I'm gonna have to go home second again, cause lord knows that's never happened to me". I am very much warming up to this new skinny Tyrie.
-5 verbal fighting points each
-25 physical fighting points each
-20 intentional nudity points (Tyrie)
-10 Business associate points (Tyrie)

Sarah Rice (130 points) Vinny Foti (200 points):
I really feel awful for my girlfriend Sarah Rice all she want's to do is compete why couldn't Bunim-Murray flown Kenny Santucci in? I know he was set to do the episode until Johanna bailed out. Especially after last season setting the precedent and bringing Mike Mike in to replace Adam Royer, regardless we'll see them both next season. For more on Vinny visit my earlier post here.
-100 points each for getting kicked off the show
-15 points each for winning immunity Challenge
-25 points Sexual Assault (Vinny)
-5 points for Verbal arguing (Vinny)
-10 points for female crying (Sarah)
-5 confessional points (Sarah)
- 25 "Moment of the episode points Vinny
- 5 points exteme intoxication Vinny
- 25 points physical fighting Vinny

Episode 2 Emergency Review: Vinny Foti

2012-02-02T12:44:00.000-08:00


The Challenge's Newest Boston Baddy

A few thoughts on what was easily the best episode since Johnny Backpacks on Cutthroat and maybe ever:

Who knew that Vinny Foti could be so entertaining? This was a guy who's previous highlights included coitusing Sarah and going home second on Fresh Meat II and getting sent in before Luke to the Gulag because he was too stupid to keep around. Let's break down his episode further

Vinny opens up the episode with a story revealing that for all intents and purposes he is the worlds best fed homeless person as his girlfriend kicked him out of the apartment. His solution: go home with a new girl every night, a normal persons: get a new apartment.
Vinny then wins his first Challenge ever. Even after his strong performance last week I'll admit I never thought Vinny Foti would win an immunity challenge especially not with his new Big Easy Look. - 15 points for winning an immunity challenge.
Vinny then goes out to the club to celebrate his win with Sarah and see if she'll sleep with him for winning her a challenge. Apparently finds out that she won't decides to take his shirt off to let the ladies know what he's working with (sidebar: next year there will be points for every time Vinny takes his shirt off provided he still has that amazing gut) and decides that Mandi should join him in shirtlessness. Surprisingly small immediate reaction from fellow castmates but when they get home is another story entirely. - 25 points for sexual assault
Vinny then returns home where he is confronted by a unusually level headed but lovestruck Wes Bergmann who cites the shows rules as the only reason for not beating Vinny up. Vinny does not want to hear any of this and a verbal argument ensues. - 5 points for verbally arguing
TJ Lavin arrives to inform the cast that MTV does not tolerate sexual assault of any kind and that Vinny has to leave. Vinny shows that for all of the strides he's made as a valuable cast-member he still doesn't quite get it as he misses an opportunity to make a production staffer come remove him or assault TJ and instead leaves relatively quietly to pack his things. - 100 points for being kicked off outside of gameplay
Before he leaves Vinny gets one more verbal argument in with Sarah showing that he truly has no conscience and will be back.

To wrap things up I really gained a lot of respect for Vinny this episode he had a few lines that were kinda funny and found a way to ensure he got invited back, which seemed like a stretch as to date he'd been an also ran, much like Julie Stouffer who became a must get for the producers when she attempted to kill Veronica Portillo on Inferno I. Here's to Vinny finding a way to top himself next season by picking up self tattooing and transforming himself into bizarre fat Abram.

Week 2 Preliminary Scores

2012-02-01T20:16:00.000-08:00

Vinny Foti 150 points
Sexual Assault 25 points
verbal argument 5 points * 2
Being kicked off show 100 points
Winning Immunity challenge 15 points

Sarah Rice 135 points
Female crying 10 points
being kicked off show 100 points
Winning immunity challenge 15 points
5 confessionals 5 points
verbal argument 5 points

Tyrie Ballard 60 points
Intentional Nudity 20 points
Verbal Fighting 5 points
physical fighting 25 points
Business Associates comment 10 points

Jasmine Reynaud 30 points
Verbal Fighting 5 points
Physical Fighting 25 points

Leroy Garrett 15 points
Winning Elimination Challenge 10 points
5 confessionals 5 points

Naomi Defensor 15 points
Winning Elimination Challenge 10 points
5 confessionals 5 points

Wes 15 points
Verbal Fighting 5 points
10 confessionals 10 points

Johnny Bananas 10 points
plugging career 10 points

Paula Meronek 10 points
receiving a text from TJ 10 points

Mandi Moyer 10 points
Unintentional Nudity 5 points
5 confessionals 5 points

CT 5 points
Verbal Fighting 5 points

Diem 5 points
Verbal Fighting 5 points

Week 1. Scoring Leaders

2012-02-01T17:33:00.000-08:00


Our dynamic cast so young and full of promise

A few quick thoughts before we jump to the results:

We needed an extended episode badly. From the producers cut of the first 15 minutes we saw Johnny make fun of Dustins past career. Also we saw virtually nothing of the first night where Nate apparently passed out by the pool. Who Doesn't want to see that?
Also of note it appeared on the first night 1 of the females had some unintentional pool nudity. Unfortunately no way to know if that happened or not.
Dunbar owns a wolf head mask. This in and of itself is not that weird I for instance own an Optimus Prime mask that makes your voice sound like his. However Dunbar is a crazy person. Put a microphone in his face and ask him about it, you'll probably get an answer referring to a study that females are attracted to a wolf spirit.
Mandi Moyer's boyfriend has ruined her. Last time we saw Mandi she was yelling at Laurel to enjoy her sloppy seconds after CT dumped her and hooking up with Wes. This time shes calmly making observations about her fellow castmates. I think she might even be the third most mature cast member after Leroy and Mark Long

Overall I agree with Leroy's take relatively tame episode but I think this looks to be one of the better seasons.

Johnny Bananas 80 points
10 points for plugging career (Wearing the real Johnny Bananas shirt)
50 points for two you killed its from TJ
15 points for winning the immunity challenge and becoming the power couple
5 points for having 5 or more confessionals

Camilla Nakagawa 80 points
10 points for claiming to be in control of the game (on behalf of Bananas)
5 points for verbal fighting
50 points for two "you killed its"
15 points for winning the immunity challenge

CT 55 points

25 points for Sexual Assault ("I'm going to molest you")
25 points for receiving a you killed it from TJ
5 points for making 5 or more confessionals

Sarah Rice 40 points

15 points for calling your partner the worst mistake of your life
25 points for a "you killed it"

Mark Long 35 points
10 points for receiving a text message from TJ
25 points for receiving a you killed it from TJ

Nate the Nuclear Engineer 30 points

5 points for 5 or more confessionals
25 points for "the moment of the episode" (repeatedly falling from balance beam

Jasmine Reynaud 30 points
20 points for destroying an inanimate object X 2 (frame, then tearing picture)
10 points for describing relationship as business associates

Diem Brown 30 points

25 points for receiving a you killed it from TJ
5 points for 5 or more confessionals

Robin Hibbard 25 points
25 points for receiving a you killed it from TJ

Vinny Foti 25 points
25 points for a you killed it from TJ

Wes Bergman 20 points

5 points for verbal fighting (with Camilla)
10 points for winning elimination challenge

5 points for making 5 or more confessionals

Tyrie Ballard 10 points

10 points for describing relationship as business associates

Mandi Moyer 5 points
5 points for 5 or more confessionals

Paula Meronek 5 points
5 points for making 5 or more confessionals

Priscilla Mendez 5 points
5 points for making 5 or more confessionals

Inferno League:
LeanBodyMovement - 115 points
Mark Long's Left Pec - 140 points
Dustin: Pay for Gay - 30 points
Tonya's Titties - 10 points
Team Staed - 110 points
Team Mike - 65 points

Gauntlet League:
Twink Squad - 85 points
Effin Bananas - 200 points
Team Burden - 95 points
Gay High School Juniors - 60 points
Dunbar's Always Watching - 30 points

Battle of the Sexes League:
Casual Molestation - 130 points
The Swamp Donkeys - 70 points
Ageless Wonders - 125 points
Just a Business Relationship - 65 points
Dramas Wet Dream - 5 points

Top 5 teams by point per player
1. Effin Bananas 40 ppp
2. Mark Long's Left Pec 35 ppp
3. LeanBodyMovement 28.75 ppp
4. Team Staed 27.5 ppp
5. Casual Molestation 26 ppp

Pre Season Power Rankings

2012-02-01T16:36:00.001-08:00

16. Gay High School Juniors: Wes, Aneesa, Diem, Tyrie, Heather
This team will not win anything besides style points for Aneesa

15. Mark Long's Left Pec: Wes, Camilla, Sarah, Rachel
Why the'll win it all: Wes returns to his roots as an elimination round stud. Camilla sits atop the power couple throughout the competition. Sarah sticks around long enough to cause some trouble and Rachel reminds everyone she's the best female player ever.
Why they won't: Does any of that besides Camilla sound very likely to you?

14. Dustin: Pay for Gay: Diem, Abram, Emily, Dustin
Why they'll win it all: Diem finally wins a challenge in the feelgood story of 2012 coming all the way back from ovarian cancer. Abram goes on the rampage we all know he is capable of but have never seen. Emily and Dustin pleasantly surprise.
Why they won't: Diem is relying big time on CT to not go insane and get her kicked off, same with Emily and Ty. Dustin probably won't be here long and Abram is a loose cannon.

13. Team Maxfield: Ty, Paula, Leroy, Aneesa, Heather
Why they'll win it all: Ty careers and finally embraces his destiny as the black CT. Paulas newfound confidence from winning a challenge enables her to work with Dunbar. Leroy and Aneesa are their usual solid selfs and Heather manages to stick around for a few weeks.
Why they won't: This team is all role players and no stars. Meaning when the clock is ticking down and you need someone to have an STD scare who do you turn to?

12. Just a Business Relationship: Jasmine, Dunbar, Naomi, Diem, Priscilla
Why they'll win it all: Every single one of these players has a little crazy in them: Jasmine; multiple personalities, Dunbar; sexual deviancy, Naomi; stage 5 clinger, Diem; long term association with CT, Priscilla; 19 yrs old
Why they won't: Crazy doesn't have the best history in winning challenges.

11. Tonya's Titties: Dunbar, Cara Maria, Aneesa, Tyrie
Why they'll win it all: Dunbar is a real threat to rape over half the cast, which for sure will leave Cara Maria in tears in a scene reminiscent of 300 "your not going to like this". Tyrie might actually be in good enough shape to play for the University of Nebraska for the first time in his life.
Why they won't: Dunbar and Paula hate each other too much to succeed. Cara Maria and Abe seem destined to explode. Aneesa has to compete with the boys. And Tyrie despite being 100 pounds less of Tyrie is still Tyrie.

Top 10 after the jump:

10. The Swamp Donkeys: Wes, Cara Maria, Robin, Dustin, Vinny
Why they'll win it all: Doubling up on the Wes trying to make a castmate cry and succeeding and Cara Maria handcuff was a stroke of genius. Vinny completes his transformation into Big Easy making no one want to face him in the Domefor fear weight will be involved.
Why they won't: Quite honestly Cara Maria and Robin are the only ones I expect to last past week 4. And I don't think Robin is gonna be involved in much drama.

9. Twink Squad: CT, Robin, Emily, Rachel, Mandi
Why they'll win it all: CT and Rachel intimidate the rest of the castmates to the point everyone else is afraid to look at them and Mandi sleeps her way back to the top next to CT in a move calculated by CT to infuriate Diem.
Why they won't win it all: CT has a history of trimming the fat which is typically woman. This does not bode well for Team Cleaver.

8. LeanBodyMovement: CT, Jasmine, Leroy, Nate
Why they'll win it all: CT cannabalizes all of his housemates including his teammates tho Nate gets heavily intoxicated beforehand.
Why they won't: All of their partners have serious flaws that could impair their ability to make it deep in the game

7. Team Mike: Mark, Mandi, Naomi, Vinny
Why they'll win: Mark gets all the way to the end and wins his first Challenge since Battle of the Sexes as part of his farewell tour. Mandi and Wes go into every single Dome where they fight and coitus their way through them. And Naomi ends up being every bit as crazy as we think.
Why they won't: Aside from Mark none of the other three members of this team have accomplished anything in elimination rounds.

6. Dunbar's Always Watching: Leroy, Abram, Dunbar, Naomi, Nate
Why they'll win it all: Leroy is a true genius who knows how stick around and pull out a clutch surprising win. Abram has tattoos and brands all over his body that he gave himself and is a real threat to wind up with multiple unexplained Cold sores. And there's a real chance Dunbar rapes someone this time
Why they won't: Naomi sucks. Abram could be quit to go save his business again. Paula could get creeped out by Dunbar and quits on him. And lets be real Nate's not gonna help much.

5. Ageless Wonders: Mark Long, Bananas, Emily, Rachel, Tyrie
Why they'll win it all: Mark and Bananas are the best one two punch in all of the leagues. Emily and Rachel are by far the strongest two girls in the game and Tyrie has dropped serious weight plus we know from the previews Jasmine's gonna hit him.
Why they won't: Lets be honest Mark is a little old he could easily throw a back, Rachel has to beat the boys everytime out that won't be easy. And oh yeah Tyries challenge history sucks.

4. Casual Molestation: CT, Abram, Mandi, Nate, Sarah
Why they'll win: The new mature CT returns to Duel II era punch through wall fitness with Duel I era restraint and dominates the competition, Abram goes insane, Mandi sleeps around, and Nates castmates stage an intervention.
Why they won't: The sight of Diem sends CT in Duel II era anger causing him to punch someone and go home, Abram dissassioates back to the small town Montana boy, Mandi stays loyal to her bf, and Nate gets a job at a nuclear power plant.

3. Team Burden: Mark, Jasmine, Ty, Paula, Vinny
Why the'll win: Mark Long will provide sound zen veteran leadership for a squad of noted youngster upandcoming hotheads in Jasmine, Ty, and Vinny enabling them to go further than ever before. Meanwhile Paula will do her thing crying and eating her skin in the background.
Why they won't: We haven't seen Mark Long since the Duel II it is certainly possible he lost a step and besides Paula none of the rest have even made a final challenge.

2. Team Staed: Johnny, Robin, Ty, Paula
Why they'll win: Johnny Robin and Paula are all veterans who know how to go deep into Challenges and score points along the way, getting Paula in the final round was the best pick out of all 3 drafts. Ty has scraped a decent career without really trying according to castmates if he decides to turn it on could be a factor.
Why they won't: If Bunim-Murray decides to feature the next generation these vets screen times could be seriously decreased reducing their point scoring abilities.

1. Effin Bananas: Bananas, Camilla, Cara Maria, Sarah, Dustin
Why they'll win: Johnny is the best player in this years challenge hands down. Camilla and Cara Maria are two of the better competitors for girls and also stand to gain major crying points. Sarah and Dustin are the best kind of non-factors capable of surprising you.
Why they won't: Wes and Mandi winning the power couple and sending in Bananas and Camilla could backfire on the #EffinBananas handcuff.

Battle of the Sexes League Grades

2012-02-01T16:34:00.001-08:00

25. Heather Marter - Team Maxfield

Without a doubt she has the lowest Challenge Potential from her cast, however she’s knowingly dating a guy who did gay porn so she’s probably got some crazypoints in her. Grade B-

24. Priscilla Mendez - Team Just a Business Relationship

I watched RW San Diego like every episode like every episode this is all I know about Priscilla: she’s very proud of her fake boobs and isn’t afraid to show them, her mom is only 37! (younger than Mark Long) and she doesn't seem very athletic. Grade C-

23. Tyrie Ballard - Team Ageless Wonders

Look I don’t care how many times he says it Tyrie clearly didn’t play football at Nebraska a simple google search reveals that. Nevertheless he’s clearly a big body with a fair amount of potential who had a pretty good showing last season against Wes and Kenny. Pairing him with noted competitor/crazy person Jasmine combined with weight loss seems to be a decent recipe for success. Grade B

22. Vinny Foti - Team Czerniak

Vinny is one of the physically strongest contestants due to his steroid use, unfortunately for his owners he is also one of the dumbest and I think he might just be dumber then previously thought. Look we knew from Day 1 on Fresh Meat II when he could not solve one of the easiest puzzles known to man that he wasn't exactly smart, but ever since he lost to Big Eazy on Cutthroat hes been gone from the public eye. I often times found myself wondering what he has been doing, now we know thanks to the pre Series interview that he’s homeless and oh yeah he has transformed himself into Big Easy’s image in an apparent attempt to confront his weakness which once again leads me to question his sanity. Grade B

21. Sarah Rice. - Team Casual Molestation

Puzzle/Tattoo master Sarah just competes trailers have revealed that Vinny has decided to imitate Kennys attempts at making Sarah cry which should yield points and perhaps yank out the true competitive performance we all know she has in her. Grade A

20. Nate the Nuclear Engineer - Team Casual Molestation

Nate is a party animal he is also a Nuclear Engineer there are also reports he was working at Fukushima Daiishi in Japan 2011. Even though his stay may be short look for him to get reallllly drunk and make a regrettable decision. Grade B

19. Dustin Zito - Team Czerniak

Dustin Zito is definitely a gamble of sorts with proven commodity Sarah Rice and coitus master Tyrie Ballard on the board. However niether of them have ever done porn so its not a crazy reach. Plus he is the unofficial record holder of most hours of confessionals filmed during his 6 months on RW Las Vegas with 3 years. Grade B +

18. Rachel Robinson - Team Ageless Wonders

Rachel is the only girl that will stand any chance against Emily in the Dome, unfortunately for her she will actually be going against Ty Ruff in that scenario. Fortunately the way the Challenges have been the last few partner seasons her and Aneesa should be able to avoid being the worst couple and if they play their Social game right there are a few couples that the Power Couple would prefer to send in before them. Grade B-

17. Diem Brown - Team Branton

One of the few Challengers that claims to own a "succesful" business along with Wes Diem is back to raise more awareness about Cancer and how it sucks. She's partnered with CT again which has been good and bad for her Challenge wise in the past but has always left her in tears of both happiness and fear/sadness. Grade B

16. Aneesa Ferreira - Team Maxfield

I've often wondered why no one has seen it fit to name Aneesa the great melting pot as she certainly is a microcosm of America what with her mixed heritage, will to win and different looks shes undergone in an attempt to understand herself regardless shes back and happy to be here look for her to have a stronger performance then last time on Rivals. Grade B+

Top 15 after the break:

15. Leroy Garrett - Team Maxfield

#TeamLeanBody its a movement. Leroy is all about the money which reminds me of Landon Leuck in some ways as they both abstained from any of the sillyness and politicing that goes on in the Challenges. This season Leroy will have his work cut out for him suppresing the crazyness that comes out of Naomis mouth and keeping them out of the Dome. Grade A-

14. Naomi Defensor - Team Branton

Naomi is the latest in a long line of Latin chicks with questionable sanity to partake in the Challenge Veronica Portillo and Tina Borda come to mind as others. Unlike those 2 Naomi is both likable and actually has feelings for another human being (Leroy). Similar to those 2 she's likely to do something crazy none of us could predict (snuggle up with Evan in hopes of being kept around, punching Beth) Grade A

13. Emily Shromm - Team Ageless Wonders

As was previously stated Emily makes up 1/2 of the biggest question mark couple everyone knows you'll get a strong performance out of Emily who really can't be matched physically by every girl here the question really is Ty who could either bow out in the first round or take them all the way to the end. Emily is also almost certain to coitus another castmate as 24 others are in play for her. Grade B+

12. Robin Hibbard - Team Czerniak

Robin even going back to RW San Diego has never really brought a lot to the table but she's found away to stick around past her expiration date on Rivals it was because of her cringeworthy tongue-lashing of Aneesa on the original Duel. This Season its because production needed a partner for Mark Long lets break down the conversation: Jodi? has a real job won't do it, Tonya? in rehab somewhere, Robin? she has a kid now...but she's never been afraid to leave him at home before - ok great book her oh and bring Aneesa back too maybe she can make America uncomfortable again.

11. Mandi Moyer - Team Casual Molestation

When Mandi first arrived on the scene she was the pretty young Fresh Meat everyone felt bad for because she was partnered with the slightly overbearing Wes and her desire to party didn't quite jive with his goals of destroying evil. Since then she's continued to party and hook up with castmates and added fake boobs and self confidence to her repertoir. Its a relatively safe bet to say she's gonna clash either with Wes or the people Wes clashes with. Grade B

10. Abram Boise - Team Casual Molestation

Abram Boise recently became the proud owner of Athens Georgias premier nightlife and concert destination, Bad Decisions. It will be interesting to see how no longer training at elevation affects his physical game. If the previews are any indication moving into the modern world seems to have inspired Abram to adapt to an early 2000s era haircut and earring look along with his homemade tattoos which will hopefully cause some verbal arguments. Grade A

9. Cara Maria Sorbello - Team Czerniak

Cara Maria is that tantalizing draft pick that hasn't yet put it all together but has shown flashes of dominance. She's strong enough physically to have made it to two consecutive final challenges. She's spent a fair amount of time crying and is easily frazzled. She's had a weird sexualish type relationship with Abram. Most importantly on the Fresh Meat II reunion she revealed that shes a dominatrix. We've seen the coitusing and winning on cutthroat, the crying and winning on Rivals but have yet to see her put all four together. Hopefully for team Czerniak that will happen on Exes. Grade A +

8. Johnny Bananas - Team Ageless Wonders

Riding the biggest winning streak of any contestant in the Challenge getting Bananas here is a steal. The more I think about the more similarities I see between Bananas game and that of the John Madden era Oakland Raiders they changed the game by emphasizing speed he changed it by emphasizing getting in peoples heads, they both were widely hated by all but their fans and at the end of the day they both just win baby. Grade A+

7. Dunbar Flinn - Team Branton

The ladies love Dunbar and Dunbar loves the ladies fortunately for team Just a business relationship Dunbar loves the ladies a little too much putting sexual assault points in play. Furthermore Dunbar is one of only a few contestants to have a rule put in place due to his actions, watching a castmate sleep, along with cannibalism, CT, and revealing a career in porn Dustin. Grade A-

6. Paula Meronak - Team Maxfield

Paula is an absolute maneater. Known for pouncing on an unexpecting male competitor and riding them as far as she can: Derek, Dunbar, Mike Mike. Unfortunately for her none of them have made it very far yet which means that Nate should expect a snuggle buddy. Also she can accurately be described as a Stage 5 clinger, like really. Grade A

5. Ty Ruff - Team Maxfield

Chances for verbal arguments with Emily are high. If he decides to exert himself physically this Challenge he and Emily will be extremely difficult to defeat in the Dome. A repeat of his plant bed smashing incident would be best case. Grade B

4. Jasmine Reynaud - Team Branton

Other then possibly Abram Jasmine is the only castmate have an alternate personality and what a useful personality Rashida is. Jasmine takes care of the crying and Rashida takes care of the assault, threats to leave, and arguing. One thing that cannot be overlooked is that last season Jasmine cheated on her boyfriend with Tyrie, this year she says that will not happen again what she neglects to mention is that her current boyfriend is that same one!!! Once you cheat on someone once and they dont leave you its way easier to do it the next time just look at Ronnie and Sammy Sweetheart from the Jersey Shore. Grade A+

3. Mark Long - Team Ageless Wonders

The old man is back! and this time hes retiring for real. I suppose the biggest question surrounding Mark is who he chooses to give his bandana to this time as it has propelled Derrick to previously unimaginable heights. I'd really like to see him give it to Leroy my favorite RWer of all time. The one thing I'll miss most about Mark is the always clever scenes he creates for when receiving a txt from Teej especially his signature have everyone throw a pillow at me. Look for the original Road Ruler to make it clear through to the Final without difficulty. Grade A

2. Wes Bergmann - Team Czerniak

The self styled "fighter of evil", "protector of good", "scalp collector", and "businessman" has lost his mojo in recent Challenges with his best finish being 2nd on Rivals where he rather bizarrely couldn't climb a mountain. This time hes traded a strong partner Mr. Beautiful for a relatively weak one in Mandi Moyer whos last partnership with Wes ended in an early exit. Grade C

1. Chris "CT" Tamburello - Team Tim

CT is many things a Challenge champion is not one of them. To be honest I don't expect him to get it done this year as I believe Diem is a deceptively weak competitor who doesn't do well with the stress that comes from being partnered with her. I do however expect him to put up quite a few points along the way ranging from Sexual Assault to Intentional Nudity and maybe even Male crying if Diem brings up his big brother who's killer only just got convicted last May. Grade A

Gauntlet Draft Grades

2012-01-28T13:28:00.001-08:00

25. Nate the Nuclear Engineer - Team Gower

Lets be real Nate and Priscilla are gonna be the first couple going home. That doesn't mean Nate isn't going to score more points then people that leave after him he has the highest potential for intoxication points of any Challenger since Adam Royer and is quite possible in the top 5 of that category of all time. Grade B+

24. Heather Marter - Team Gustafson

Probably the most boring RW castmate of her season Heather is going to need to step her game up if she hopes to become a Challenge regular. Fortunately I do think she has it in her she's one person making fun of her for Dustin's porn career away from a verbal argument, crying and calling her Mom. Grade B

23. Vinny Foti - Team Burden

As previously mentioned Vinny added a small child to part of his diet since we last saw him resulting in a nice pare shaped body. Due to his lack of intelligence this may be part of his strategy as he was eliminated by the much larger and doughier Big Easy. Grade B

22. Dustin Zito - Team Effin Bananas

Dustin will get at least 5 points each week hes there for confessionals. He will get made fun of for his (potential sexual orientation) and he may cry. If he gets drunk enough he might even fight. He's gonna hook up with Heather to prove his straightness and when doing all that he just might play a better Social/Physical game then you expect. Grade B-

21. Mandi Moyer - Team Cleaver
Mandi has always had two things going for her on the Challenges a willingness to try anything (see her licking a blood spot on the floor of the tent on the Fresh Meat II Combine) and willingness to hook up with just about all of her male castmates: Luke, Chet, CT, Wes (shes only been on 3 Challenges) unfortunately she has a serious boyfriend at home. Fortunately she got breast implants after Cutthroat so she should be ready to rock. Grade B+

20. Rachel Robinson - Team Cleaver

One of the strongest (her twitter is @Rachel_Fitness) female competitors in Challenge history she actually finished before all of the male's on The Duel II. Rachel will have to repeat her performance of beating men as she will for all intents and purposes be competing directly with them. Look for her to try and hook-up/coitus Emily Shromm as she promised in her preview video and give a better showing then you might expect against the males. Grade B+

19. Sarah Rice - Team Effin Bananas

The great tattoed one, Sarah always brings a sense of fun to the challenges as she's known around the house for having lots of games to pass the time. She also balances that with a fierce competitive side. Unfortunately for her she has only failed to podium when paired with a single partner. Whats double unfortunate is she is once again partnered with Vinny Foti who she paired with on her worst finish to date on Battle of the Sexes II whos singlehandedly kept the price of bacon grease steady by eating every last bit Tyrie said no to since we last saw him on Cutthroat. Grade B

18. Paula "Walnuts" Meronek - Team Burden

The only bad part of Rivals was watching Paula get her first win. She was much more interesting as a truly pathetic character that didn't get that she wasn't really in any alliances and was not especially good at any challenge. Also we will no longer get to hear her say that she just cares about the win not the money whatever the hell that means. Fortunately I doubt winning solved any of her insecurity crisises so expect a self loathing filled coitus and multiple crying sessions. Grade A

17. Tyrie Ballard - Team Gustafson

To date Tyrie's best showing in a Challenge was probably the island where he lected to return home early due to an illness in the family? Coincidentally due to starvation that was probably the lightest Tyrie has been on a challenge which is why many are picking the big man to go far for the first time ever as he looks to have cut bacon grease out of his diet and may even be showering regularly. Grade B

16. Naomi Defensor - Team Gower

Classic stage 5 clinger, Naomi caught feelings for Leroy on RW Las Vegas. If they aren't reciprocated on Exes (they won't be) expect Naomi to do something crazy. This could damage their Social game when Johnny and CT decide they are tired of hearing her yelling, but should result in massive points before then regardless. Grade B+

Top 15 After the Break:

15. Dunbar Flinn - Team Gower

Without a doubt every challenge Dunbar enters he is the most likely to commit sexual assault. After allegedly blowing all of his Cutthroat winnings on somesort of silver astro-van/rape headquarters??? Dunbar comes in hungry to refill his coffers. Expect a coitus with at least one castmate (I'd take Robin) and a fight with Paula resulting in him watching her sleep. Grade A

14. Diem Brown - Team Gustafson

Two letters CT not only is he guaranteed to drag her deep into the competition she is also certain to elicit multiple emotional reactions from the big guy. While Diem does not know many of the other competitors this year as she typically does I definitely expect to see her befriend some of them which may even keep the power couple from throwing CT into the Dome every chance they get. Grade A-

13. Ty Ruff - Team Burden

Ty comes in with one of the more interesting villain resumes in Challenge History. He definitely loves to play the bad guy as one of only 2 competitors to attempt murder on the show (Julie Stouffer being the other, though it could be argued CT has as well) when he pushed Andrew off the balcony during his RW season. Then he does weird stuff like lose to the much smaller Brandon in a challenge where weight was clearly the most important factor. Grade B+

12. Cara Maria Sorbello - Team Effin Bananas

Cara Maria often gets ignored as one of the stronger female competitors due to her pirate wardrobe flukey early exit on Fresh Meat II and propensity to cry when put under pressure, but lets review the facts she was the decisive winner of the Fresh Meat II combine (questionable pull ups not-withstanding), she's coming off 2 straight podium finishes, and partnered with noted motivator/insane person Abram. Grade A

11. Emily Shromm - Team Cleaver

A true dual threat to coitus with either males or females comes into the Challenge looking to drag partner Ty Ruff to his best finish yet. As a finalist in her only other appearance on Cutthroat she certainly seems capable of doing so. Grade A-

10. Robin Hibbard - Team Cleaver

One of the most veteran woman on this Challenge Robin pairs with ex boy toy Mark Long. While Robin has certainly had her low points (The Duel I Aneesa incident) she has seemed to change significantly since the arrival of her son Peyton. Look for her to have her best season yet as long as she lays low. Grade B-

9. Camilla Nakagawa - Team Effin Bananas

The Brazilian Chiquita banana comes into her third straight challenge looking to break through and make her first final. Camilla has an extremely respectable elimination round record and history of giving 100% pairing with Johnny Bananas should help her to go deep. Expect her to clash with other girls and call Wes on his BS of running the Challenge. Grade A-

8. Jasmine Reynaud - Team Burden

An absolute firecracker you can be sure that Jasmine will do a few things: break all kinds of shit, insult her partner, cry, threaten to leave, verbally/physically fight with someone and if I were a betting man I'd say theres a good chance she cheats on her boyfriend too. Look for her to be a solid competitor in the challenges as well. Grade A+

7. Aneesa Ferreira - Team Gustafson

While Aneesa has never won a competition she has also always proven to be a strong competitor. Shes also a shoe in for multiple big time scores in calling the game evil as she has literally no fear in calling out her less morale castmates. Look for her to compete her heart out and leave with a "you killed it" from TJ Grade B

6. Abram Boise - Team Gower

We first met Abe as a typical small town Wild boy going off having threesomes that loved to fight. Now he's barely recognizable as his body is covered in tattoos and brands. Yet the fire that burns within him clearly still exists as he has had one of the most consistent careers in Challenge history always making it deep into Challenges. Partnered with Cara Maria a strong female competitor he has to be considered a threat to get his first ever individual win. Grade A

5. Leroy Garrett - Team Gower

Leroy comes in off the most impressive debut Challenge in Rookie history complacently riding the wave of being kept around for being a weak team then singlehandedly winning the final immunity Challenge to make the final. Fortunately for him he will not have to change his strategy as with Naomi he is unlikely to perform extremely well in the Challenges. Grade B+

4. Wes Bergmann - Team Gustafson

One of the more controversial players in Challenge History Wes went from seeming close friends with Fresh Meat era Evan Starkmann and Kenny Santucci to sworn enemies primarily due to his Raskolnikov complex. While Rivals may have been a return to form for Wes as he made it to the final he really hasn't been the same player since his return from retirement in The Ruins. Grade C+

3. Mark Long - Team Burden

The oldest competitor in Challenge history Mark comes in at 40 years young looking for his first win since Battle of the Sexes I Mark looks to improve on two straight podium finishes in Gauntlett 2 and Duel 2. Grade A

2. Johnny Bananas - Team Effin Bananas

Bananas comes into Exes off a fairly dominating victory in Rivals. Perhaps the greatest Social Game player in history as he always seems to be the object of half the casts hate but rarely enters elimination rounds he has to be considered amongst the favorites; especially when factoring in that he and partner Camilla don't have an ugly past. Grade A+

1. Chris "CT" Tamburello - Team Cleaver

The bad boy from Bean town has never failed to be one of the most compelling characters on the Challenges. From bikiniing up on the original Inferno to punching through a wall to beat the crap out of Adam King to spending all of Rivals trying to become friends with Adam King he has produced massive points every season. Surprisingly despite making it to the final challenge of three challenges and extremely deep in several others CT has never won he comes into Rivals looking to change that with past lover Diem. Grade A

Inferno Draft Grades

2012-01-26T22:49:00.001-08:00

24. Heather Marter - Team Henne

Not  likely to bring much to the table as one of the weaker RW minor leaguers in recent history.  Hopefully her partnership with Dustin as the only pair currently dating will lead to some coitus points. Grade C-

23. Rachel Robinson - Team Matt

One of the strongest female competitors in the history of the Challenge Rachel actually beat all of the boys to the finish on the Duel II.  It will be interesting to see if she can replicate that feat as she is half of the only all female team.  Grade B

22. Dustin Zito - Team Schilling

Former  porn star Dustin became known on RW Las Vegas for two things fighting with Mike Mike and loooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnggggggggggg confessionals.  I like his chances of playing a strong Social game and sticking around longer than expected.  Grade B+

21. Paula Walnuts - Team Staed

Though  hated by most fans for being an insecure wacko who lashes out at others for no reason just to feel better about her pathetic existence as Laurel Stuckey pointed out last Season on Rivals.  Paula is indisputadely the best value of this draft as if nothing else she can be  counted on for consistent crying points and is even a threat to repeat as champion. Grade A+++

Top 20 after the jump.

20. Tyrie Ballard - Team Santangelo

Though  he has traditionally been one of the first competitors to go home in every challenge he has competed in Tyrie has for the first time gotten himself back into the shape he must have been at when he "allegedly" played football for Nebraska.  Whether he breaks his streak of ineptitude is yet to be seen.  Grade B

19. Vinny - Team Mike

Muscle bound Boston hot head Vinny makes no secret of his distaste for puzzles, but with his strong record of coitusing and fighting during brief appearances on Fresh Meat II and the Ruins he is certainly at worst a good value pick for this late in the draft.  Grade B-

18. Naomi - Team Mike

While not the best athlete of the females Naomi is poised to score big points after catching feelings for partner and castmate Leroy from RW Las Vegas.  Weather she scores them from fighting, coitusing, crying, or all  of the above is up to her.  Grade A-

17. Aneesa - Team Santangelo

Whats there to say about Aneesa that hasn't been said.  She's a true vet with the heart of a champion and to date the only contestant to be gifted a jacket by Teej after losing.  It will be interesting to see how things play out with her and Rachel being the only all female team.  Grade B+

16. Ty Ruff - Team Staed

Ty
 is one of the toughest competitors to get a read on.  He clearly is physically strong, but his gulag loss to Brandon can only be described as weird. After a decent showing in Rivals it will be interesting to see  which Ty shows up.  Grade B

15. Emily Shromm - Team Schilling

Emily  is in an awful situation as she appears to be a genuinely decent person forced to pair with a really nasty ex in Ty whos not even especially good at the challenges.  Fortunately for Emily she has a history of dominating the females of the competition and with no Laurel or Evelynn she is clearly the strongest female on the show (aside from Rachel Robinson who is paired with a female defaulting Rachel as top dog) Grade B

14. Sarah Rice - Team Matt

Sarah  has been one of the most consistent competitors since her debut making it to the finals of the Ruins and Cutthroat.  A master of the Social game she certainly seems primed to make it much further than her last partnership with Vinny which ended after just 2 episodes. Grade B+

13. Leroy - Team Henne

Leroy had an unusually strong rookie campaign making it all the way to the final challenge and even won challenges with 2 different partners Adam Royer and Mike Mike Ross.  Paired with a similarly weak physical partner,  Leroy will once again have to should the load in the challenges.  However a reunion with former RW castmate Naomi leaves the possibility of coitus points. Grade B+

12. Jasmine Reynaud - Team Henne

To  put it lightly Jasmine has the destructive force of a Northeastern storm, as long as she is around no mirror in the house will be safe, 
threats to leave will be made, drinks will be had, and fights will be started.  Grade A++

11. Camilla - Team Matt

 Camilla has experience decent success in the Challenges but has yet to really make an impact.  With no fear of starting a fight, a history of consistent effort in the Challenges, and a pairing with noted vet Johnny Bananas Camilla is a strong upside pick. Grade B+

10. Abram Boise - Team Schilling

Abram  is without a doubt the best self tattoo/brander in Challenge history.  In a unrelated note many of his peers think he is just a little insane.  Armed with a new pierce filled look Abram appears ready to unleash the fire burning within him on teammate Cara Maria in an attempt to make her cry.  Grade A

9. Robin - Team Staed

Not  a lot to say here Robin plays a decent social game enabling her to go last awhile in Challenges but has yet to win one.  She'll be hitching her wagon to the Mark Long train for this Challenge.  Don't rule her out for a big point repeat of her questioning Aneesa's sexuality.  Grade B-

8. Cara Maria - Team Santangelo

Slightly off balanced Dominatrix Cara Maria has proven herself to be a strong competitor after an inauspicious start to her career in Fresh Meat II.  Also working in her favor this challenge is the messy on off relationship with noted hot head Abram Boise expect crying points aplenty. Grade A

7. Mandi Moyer - Team Mike

While not the strongest of competitors physically Mandi is always a threat to post multiple coituses last year with both teammate Wes and CT.  Armed with new Breast implants Mandi is poised to make her way through the cast.  Hopefully hers and Wes' partnership will last longer than it did on Fresh Meat II. Grade A-

6. Mark Long - Team Mike

Mark Long is the godfather of these challenges appearing in both Road Rules and the initial RW/RR the Challenge where he walked away with $8100 dollars from the Universal Studios money pit.  Mark is so respected by his fellow competitors that he has never been taken into an elimination round making him a strong bet to be there at the end.  How much drama he will cause along the way at age 40 is up for debate.  Grade A

5. Dunbar - Team Santangelo

Dunbar has let nothing stand in his way to become a challenge champion; overcoming mild retardation, doomed relationships, and child abuse.  Dunbar is alway a threat to score in both the physical aspect and sexual assault parts of the scoring system. Grade B+

4. Johnny Bananas -Team Staed

One of the few competitors in the history to overcome multiple initial early round eliminations and become a multiple time champion Bananas is arguably the strongest competitor today.  According to alumni Evan Starkmann no one prepares for the challenges better then Johnny B. Grade A+

3. Diem Brown - Team Schilling

Ovarian cancer survivor Diem has always played a strong social game using her sympathy points to avoid elimination rounds but has struggled with the physicality.  She has not appeared on a challenge with CT since the ugly massacre of Adam Kings face in Duel II hopefully Battle of the Exes will be equally point filled for both competitors.  Grade B+
 2. Wes Bergmann - Team Matt

The first individual champ in challenge history (The Duel) is alway a threat in the challenges with his self described "Roman God body". 
 However he appears to be losing some of his game with age.  Last year he even failed to make Cara Maria cry.  Grade C-

1. Chris 'CT' Tamburello - Team Henne

Though CT has never won a challenge he has made it to the final three times only to be defeated by the opposing team and last season was the last team eliminated.  A staple of CTs game has always been attempting to make other players cry and decisively winning fights.  Last Season was no exception as other than Adam Royer he was the top scorer.  Grade A-

Leagues

2012-01-26T18:02:00.001-08:00

Unfortunately instead of taking a giant leap forward in the way fantasy is played and implementing a salary cap we will instead be splitting into leagues.  I suppose thats what I get for believing in America's Great Democratic tradition.  As such We will be splitting up into three different Leagues.

Breakdown after the Break.

The Inferno:

Connor Henne
Jim Staed
David Santangelo
Matt Schutt
Mike Schutt
Sam Schilling

The Gauntlett:

Effin Bananas
Dunbars Always Watching
Jake Burden
Jack Cleaver
Tom Gustafson

Battle of the Sexes:

Ageless Wonders
Casual Molestation
Sean Czerniak
Scott Maxfield
Matt Branton

2012 Battle of the Exes Rules

2012-01-26T18:00:00.000-08:00

These rules were borrowed and slightly changed from the Grantland Fantasy League. Hope everyone enjoys them. Rules after the break

Emotional/Verbal

Female Crying: 5 points
Male Crying: 20 points
Asking if a fellow cast member is there "for the right reasons": 10 points
Saying, “I didn’t come here to make friends”: 10 points
Trying to make someone cry and succeeding: 25 points
Trying to make someone cry and failing: -5 to -25 points (commissioner’s discretion)
Blaming parents for poor behavior: 10 points
Calling a friend or relative at home, crying, and saying, “Everyone here hates me”: 20 points
Threatening to sue fellow cast member: 25 points
Being subject of an intervention: 30 points
Plugging an acting, modeling, or singing career: 10 points
Singing song in front of two or more people: 20 points
Claiming to be in control of the game 10 points (1 per episode)
Every 5 explanations/talking heads/confessionals 5 points
Receiving a text message from T.J. 10 points
If another castmate says you deserve to be there more than anyone 5 points
claiming that the money/game/players are evil 10 points

Romantic/Sexual

Open-mouth kissing: 5 points per participant
Coitus (or pulling over covers in bed): 25 points per participant
Denying coitus: 10 points
Fraudulent denial of coitus: 20 points
Fraudulent claim of coitus: 25 points
Participating in threesome: 50 points per participant
STD scare: 30 points per sexual partner
Pregnancy scare: 50 points per sexual partner
Intentional nudity: 20 points
Unintentional nudity: 5 points
Hitting on the show’s host: 5 to 15 points (commissioner’s discretion)
Possession of concealed erection: 10 to 25 points (commissioner’s discretion)
Revealing past career in pornography: 50 points
Going on a show-sanctioned overnight date and not hooking up: -25 points per participant
Coitusing with a castmate older than one of your parents 200 points
Calling your teammate the worst mistake of your life 15 points
Watching a castmate sleep 10 points
Sexual Assault 25 points
Rape 50 points
Hooking up with another castmate to make your partner jealous 10 points
Making fun of a castmates sexual preference 10 points
Making fun of a castmates past career in porn 5 points
Describing relationship as business relationship 10 points

Violence

Verbal Fighting: 5 points
Physical Fighting: 25 points
Decisively winning physical fight: 25 points
Throwing drink in someone’s face: 5 points
Having unexplained black eye, fat lip, or bloody knuckles: 25 points
Being restrained or lectured on camera by security or production staff: 25 points
Requesting to be assaulted: 10 points
Invoking show’s rules as only reason for not committing assault: 10 points
Attempting to fight show’s host: 100 points
Threatening to eat a fellow cast member 5 points
Destroying an inanimate object in the house 10 points
Causing the arrival of a vehicle with a siren 10 points

Drugs/Alcohol

Extreme intoxication: 5 to 25 points (commissioner’s discretion)
Vomiting: 10 points
Having car keys taken away: 5 points
Being kicked out of bar or club: 20 points

Religious/Volunteerism

Violating stated religious beliefs: 25 points
Attending church: -10 points
Non-court-ordered volunteer work: -25 points

Early Departures

Being kicked off show: 100 points (must be eliminated outside of game play)
Causing others to threaten to leave show: 15 points
Threatening to leave show and not following through: 15 points
Threatening to leave show and following through: 30 points

Hot Tub/Helicopter/Weapon Bonus

Any points earned in hot tub and/or helicopter are scored at double value.
Any points earned where a weapon is used are scored at double value.

Competition Related

Making T.J. say, “You Killed It”: 25 points
Winning elimination challenge: 10 points
Winning immunity challenge 15 points
Winning final challenge: 50 points
Sending someone into elimination challenge because you respect them too much not to 15 points
Attempting to kill a fellow castmate in the immunity challenge via unclipping a caribbeaner or drowning 25-75 points (commisioner's discretion)
Being involved in the moment of the episode (to be voted on by participants 25 points
Being called a quitter or having your heart questioned by TJ -20 points