The UNselfish side of SELFISH

Miss

2014-03-05T01:32:00.000-06:00

Merriam-webster.com's definition of the word miss is as follows : to discover or feel the absence of. So, how can a person miss someone or something that they are in close proximity of? Believe it or not it happens more often than you think. It's funny that a loved one can go missing right before your very eyes and you not notice it until it is too late. Once you have discovered that they are gone, you then ask yourself were they really there? If they were? Did they miss you too and why is it that they didn't bring this to your attention? I have learned that some questions are better left unasked.

Love Birds

2010-03-10T03:06:00.000-06:00

Flying makes me happy, I love to spread my wings and go wherever I want to go. Flying sets my soul free, going to the highest heights and seeing the greatest sights. Why would you put me in a cage called love? I thought love would allow you to fly with me but instead it has held you captive as well. I just want to fly.

Ice cold

2010-02-19T02:57:00.000-06:00

I used to wonder if you would be here in the morning, silly of me because you’re not even here right now. The sacrifices I’ve made go unnoticed. The flowers I had delivered to your job never made it home. I wonder why? You say I haven’t let go of my past, but now I’m contemplating on leaving you in my past. Our relationship is like a baby aborted too soon, so much potential. You probably would have kept our baby if you felt a heartbeat, but as cold as you are something as soft and warm as a heart was not found in that icebox you call a chest.

I Cry

2010-02-10T04:36:00.000-06:00

When I think of you I cry. I cry tears of joy, not sorrow. Knowing that it will all be better tomorrow. The joy you bring me is unparallel by comparison. I have to tell myself that it’s ok to cry because I’ve held back the tears for so long forgetting that God counts every tear. No wonder you’re good at math, he sent me my very own mathematician. I cry because I’m happy, I cry because I’m free, I cry because he made you especially for me!

I like the way you move

2010-01-11T03:15:00.001-06:00

Everything about her screams WOMAN. Her beauty is unparalleled. I can see her with my eyes closed. I can smell her scent with a cold. I can feel her through the phone. She is strong enough for the both of us, but is woman enough to let me be a man. She always has my back but walks beside me. Her eyes can see right through to my soul. I can hold her hand and feel her heart. When she walks time stops. Forget a red bull because she gives me wings. Her natural scent will make Victoria tell all of her secrets. She is all woman and I know her bath and body works. She’ll make the guy on the polo logo get off his horse to chase her. She found me in Frederick’s of Hollywood trying to become her star. Is that Avon calling? Nope it’s just her.

Problem Solving

2010-01-04T17:00:00.000-06:00

I plus you equals a lie. Four minus two equal us. My lie to her equals truth to you and vice versa. So how can we make our forbidden love errorless if our two wrongs don’t make a right? I guess we were doing addition instead of multiplication, cause if my mathematics is correct my negative times your negative equal a positive. Question is, do you have (x) to study? If so, let class begin.

Check out time

2010-01-04T14:00:00.002-06:00

There’s a knock at the door, I whisper “baby I thought you said he thinks you’re at work?” “Check out time” the housekeeper yells. Baby this will have to be the last time, but we said that the last time. I just hope our alibi checks out this time. See ya next time.

Is it me?

2009-12-07T01:20:00.000-06:00

Finishing each other sentences and breathing simultaneously was just a couple of things we used to do when we were in sync. Remember when waking up was the best part of our day? It still is, but it’s now because we are leaving each other and going to work. It’s sad when I dread to come home but excited about leaving. Thinking about using that classic line “it’s not you, it’s me”. Surprisingly I think it really is me. Is it?

Signals of distress

2009-12-04T05:23:00.000-06:00

Help, I’ve been sending you distress signals since I could remember. How can you ignore something that is obvious? You wonder why I stay out late. It’s not because I’m seeing someone else, it’s a cry for help. You have seen many S.O.S.’s, Like the times that I’ll rather be outside the house in my car just clearing my head and not inside venting to you about the daily stress that I encounter. The times that I’m not in the mood for being intimate, should’ve been a red flag. Why can’t you recognize my smoke signals? Remember when we used to have a date night now that has been reduced to eating out of paper bags and renting four movies and only watching one. How is it possible for you not to even be the least concerned about my well being when we are a unit? I guess it’s true what the bible says “a house divided cannot stand”. We’ve been divided so long that it feels normal. I guess S.O.S. means Stuck on Stupid.

Home

2009-12-02T02:46:00.000-06:00

I feel so close to you but yet so far from whom I have at home. Why is that? They say home is where the heart is, but what if your heart is missing? You tell me to stay home and work on it, but all the while you’re showing me the blueprints to your house. True your house is bigger, and it ain’t nothing like that new house smell. (Lol) I’m so tempted to move in but if I move right now I will lose my deposit from my previous home. Is it worth it? If I break my lease with her what make you think that I will not reciprocate. I wonder if I’m better off being homeless..

She is

2009-11-23T03:46:00.004-06:00

She is frigid. She used to be torrid. She is dark. She used to be bright. She is hate. She used to be love. She is blind. She used to be able to see. She is old. She used to be young. She is bitter. She used to be sweet. She is hard. She used to be soft. She is vile. She used to be beautiful. She is silent. She used to scream (with passion). She is barren. She used to be fertile. She is shallow. She used to be deep. She is empty. She used to be full (of life). She is…….. She is dead to me!

Visible

2009-11-23T03:33:00.002-06:00

Why can’t you see me? Am I invisible? How come when someone else pays close attention in the way that I water my grass, that’s when I become visible? I don’t get it! You make it so easy for me to turn up the pressure on my hose to water her grass. How come everyone else can see how well your lawn is manicured? I don’t even feel that you appreciate the fact that I’m a landscaper, and that I take pride in my work.. She’s on the outside looking in and about to make a grand entrance through your front door, the door that used to have your name on it! Can you see me now? Good!

Remember when

2009-11-18T13:06:00.002-06:00

Remember when I used to hold your hand? Now you just slap it away. Remember when I used to sing to you? Now you can’t stand my voice. Remember when I used to open doors for you? Now all you do is slam them. Remember we used to make love? Now you just buy batteries. Remember when you didn’t care if I were using the bathroom you would come in anyway and tell me how you feel. Now you all you can say is I wish you would hurry up and flush. (lol) Remember when we used to look at the stars at night? Now all I see is darkness. Remember when I used to push you on the swings? Now all you give me is a pushy attitude. Remember when we used to pray together? Now we’re repenting for the evil thoughts we have for one another. Remember when we used to have game night with the other couples? Now they’re not a couple anymore and we all are full of games. Remember when we used to let our feet touch in the bed? Now we have an imaginary line between us. Remember when……

Butterflies

2009-11-18T01:26:00.000-06:00

The life cycle of the butterfly is as follows. 1st Is the egg. 2nd Is the caterpillar. 3rd Is the pupa. 4th Is the adult stage. Do you remember the feeling you used to get in your stomach when you saw me? Where did it go? Why is our love life going in reverse? I used to give you butterflies.

No Wings

2009-11-18T00:48:00.000-06:00

I was looking at you! You were looking at me! How come we couldn't see.... That we were drifting apart. Makes me question did we have love from the start?!!!!! Damn...... If love is for the birds, Sh*t well where are my wings?

Brown Grass

2009-11-17T14:32:00.002-06:00

You make it easy for me to see how green her grass is. It’s hard to keep your grass manicured and looking good when you are trying to see whose grass I might be watering. It’s not that I want to be a landscaper or someone that likes to play in different lawns, It’s just easy for me to be driven to want to see how green her grass is when you don’t put the time in to keep mine watered. It took time to get our grass green and full and free from weeds. And it also took time for my grass to become brown with some weeds. What is brown grass and weeds? Brown grass comes from cars being parked on it too long and the upkeep of that lawn went neglected.. Weeds are distractions, other women, and time fillers. There is still hope with brown grass. You can water brown grass back green over time, but you have to work twice as hard to get it back right. How do you water grass? Simple, just go back to the basics. Spend time with your lawn, nurture it, feed it and remove any park cars from it. What are parked cars? Parked cars are (is) when your relationship is stagnant. Put your relationship back in motion. How? Have a date night, even if it’s just at home in front of the TV. Start doing things together even if its just housework do it together. Find ways to be more involved in each other’s life and then you won’t have time to wonder if he/she is playing in someone else’s lawn..

To play or not to play

2009-11-16T16:16:00.002-06:00

You ever wondered why a man has multiple partners or friends... Its not that he's being a "player" or being "whore-ish" maybe he's searching for that 1. Or he is finding bits and pieces in these different women and putting them all together.. So go easy on the next "player" you meet, cause maybe he's just lost and waiting on you to find him

Short and Sweet

2009-11-15T18:56:00.000-06:00

Before you marry her make sure she is the one! I mean you have to consider the fact that this is someone that you have to wake up to for the rest of your life. Is she pretty enough? This is someone you have to converse with everyday. Is she well rounded enough? This is someone you have to share responsibilities with. Is she responsible enough? The last woman you will ever have sex with (OMG). Is she sexy enough? This is someone you have to lean on when times are hard. Is she strong enough? This is someone that at some point will have to go to God for you and your family. How is her relationship with God?

I once told a girlfriend of mine that while we are dating that we are interviewing each other for the position of husband and wife. That statement led to an argument. Why? I don’t know. She’s fired now. Lol