The Wicked Stepmom

How I Spent 9/11

2011-10-24T14:20:00.001-04:00

The day after the last post on this blog, I was sitting in front of the TV like so many other Americans watching the 9/11 Memorial coverage at Ground Zero. Like I do every year, I listened as the bells were rung to commemorate when each plane hit and as each tower fell. I listened to the reading off of the names and cried when they reached the name of the loved one I'd lost ten years ago. I

What I Also Did on My Summer Vacation

2011-09-10T15:59:00.000-04:00

I. Met. Bigbird! Oh yeah, Gretel did too.

What I Did On My Summer Vacation

2011-09-07T07:00:00.050-04:00

The end of August, I took the kids on a week-long vacation with my Dad and Stepmom. This was a trip I NEVER thought would happen, for a variety of reasons, the least of which came down to (lack of) money. But opportunity knocked. Just at the point in my summer when I was about to surrender and accept that there would be NO vacation - rather a STAYcation - my Dad offered the kids and I an

Clarity

2011-09-05T13:56:00.000-04:00

These past two weeks have brought with them amazing clarity as to where my life has been, and where it's going. This past Saturday, my family vacation trip with the kids and ex-BF officially came to an end. After two weeks (which was supposed to be one week but was unexpectedly extended for a week thanks to Hurricane Irene and my lack of babysitting resources), I dropped off the kids with their

This Old House: Hidden Treasures

2011-08-08T15:02:00.000-04:00

When he first tore up the carpet in Gretel's room, the ex-BF found this floorboard. Of course the first thing he did was open it to see if there was, in fact, a SAFE hidden inside. He came up empty. However, the next day, I returned to the house to take some photos of the "renovation" process and investigate on what my intuition was telling me a little further. First I decided to take a

This Old (Haunted) House?

2011-08-06T07:00:00.001-04:00

Mommy my back hurts. It's 1am and 5 y/o Gretel has come downstairs into my bedroom. She can't sleep because her back hurts. I snuggle her and chalk it up to a gas pain (she is prone to that sort of thing). In the dark, I try to comfort her by laying my hand on the tender spot to give her a little energy treatment. Her body tenses and she cringes in pain. As she trembles at my touch, I notice her

This Old House

2011-08-03T07:00:00.002-04:00

In June, I moved out of the home the kids and I shared with PrinceCharming for six years, and moved into a cheaper home two miles down the road. This house was built in the 1800s and once served as a stage coach inn. I LOVE old homes! Love their energy and the stories they tell. I knew as soon as I saw the massive Tara-esque front stair case and the original wide plank wood floors that I had to

Forgiveness

2011-08-01T14:50:00.000-04:00

Forgiveness is not something we do for other people. We do it for ourselves-to get well and move on.My abuser died last month. And with his death rose a myriad of emotions I wasn't expecting. Relief. Anger. Grief. Relief knowing that no other little girls would fall victim to his sick perversions. Anger because of the lack of adequate punishment for his actions, and the lack of protection I

On Birthdays and Breakups (Part II)

2011-07-26T12:00:00.000-04:00

Prince Charming, Cinderella and Hansel all have July birthdays. Last week, my ex-husband and ex-stepdaughter came to my house to celebrate Hansel's 9th birthday. This past weekend it was Hansel and Gretel's turn to visit their Dad's to celebrate his and Cinderella's birthdays. But before that, presents needed to be purchased and cards were made. I know the subject of birthdays is a hot topic

The Root of All Evil

2011-07-25T12:26:00.000-04:00

I'm quickly running out of money. Despite moving into a new house that's cheaper in rent (and utilities) and increasing my hours at work, I'm facing the reality that I will most likely be able to cover my rent for one more month after which my savings will be totally depleted. I'm feeling a little panicky. My car is overdue for inspection. And an oil change. And there's a rattle in my muffler

On Birthdays and Breakups

2011-07-20T20:28:00.000-04:00

"I don't know why [he] wouldn't want to be my Mom's boyfriend anymore because I think she's the most beautiful woman in the whole world." Honest words spoken by my now 9 year old to his therapist, over my recent breakup with my (rebound) boyfriend. Aside from the whole "AWWWW!" factor to his statement, it was also a glaring reminder that a follow-up conversation was needed to set some issues

Just Breathe

2011-07-05T16:41:00.001-04:00

"Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud And I know that you'll use them, however you want to..." Breaking the fourth wall of this fairytale story has become a double-edged sword lately. This blog and Twitter have been my forum for seven years. Both started as a place of anonymity where I could escape my reality and write, vent, wax philosophical or mindlessly ramble without feeling

A Matter of Time

2011-07-03T07:00:00.002-04:00

The kids are going to see their Dad today. Technically, this weekend is my custodial weekend with them. But the lines of custody and visitation are blurred in our home lately. And I'm ok with that. For ten years we were controlled by a strict custodial schedule with Cinderella, which did little to foster a positive relationship between her and her mother. Instead it served as a constant reminder

Doing Everything I Can

2011-07-01T22:31:00.001-04:00

"Keep and eye out for Cinderella and tell the kids that I love them!" This is the text that I received 10pm Sunday night. Since taking the kids on full time since May, they've seen their Dad only a handful of times. And have not slept over his house for months. He's being treated for anxiety and depression; checked himself into a local behavioral treatment center TWICE and is working to find the

In Need of a Muse

2011-06-25T20:53:00.001-04:00

It's that time of year again where I put photos to music and create a birthday montage video. Hansel is going to be NINE. 9. The number before 10. N-I-N-E!! I'll let you ponder that for a moment. Yeah, I know. I KNOW! How in the hell did the kid in this post grow up to become this future-heartbreaker: CHECK OUT THE DAVID CASSIDY HAIR PEOPLE!!! I mean, really! *swoon* Anyway, after nine

Stability Amongst the Chaos

2011-05-11T07:00:00.014-04:00

Lots of shifts are afoot in the castle. Custody changes. Moving to a new castle. Finding my independence. Financial juggling resulting from the aforementioned happenings. All for the better, but difficult nontheless. My conviction is being tested constantly. I'm just taking it day by day - and sometimes breath by breath. But in the words of the infamous Charlie Sheen, I'm "WINNING!" Prince

Home is...

2011-05-09T21:18:00.001-04:00

... where you hang your tire swing. We're moving. In the midst of custody changes and emotional breakdowns, financial struggles and living paycheck to paycheck - a light at the end of the tunnel has appeared. A gorgeous home, larger than the one I have rented for the past 6 years and CHEAPER. Same school district. Closer to Hansel & Gretel's closest buds. It's perfect in every way. Judging by

Depression Hurts

2011-04-19T20:36:00.000-04:00

After two days of radio silence, PrinceCharming calls to tell me he is home.Home after spending two days in an in-patient psych unit at our local medical center.After receiving the cryptic texts from him two nights before, I did my own research into the facility.It's hard core. They don't accept just anyone, and they certainly do not let you check yourself in without good reason.Good reason, I

Paradigm Shift

2011-04-12T09:40:00.000-04:00

PrinceCharming has never been the one to talk about feelings. Or share the deepest part of himself with anyone. He was raised by an mother who was emotionally absent and a father who was physically absent (he worked the night shifts at the Post Office). This was his upbringing. These were his role models. And this was, in part, one of the reasons our marriage failed. (His parents are lovely

[Insert Snarky Title Here]

2011-03-31T07:00:00.002-04:00

HIM [via text]: What is the plan for the kids going forward? ME: I have no idea you are asking. HIM: At this juncture, I don't think that I will be able to get / hold a job while trying to manage the kids during the week. *** (Background Reminder: We currently have joint/shared custody. The kids spend Mon-Wed AM at my house; Wed PM-Fri at his house. We alternate weekends. I work when they are at

Chew On This

2011-03-29T07:00:00.002-04:00

Hansel teeters around 50lbs. He's 8. Most times he looks ok. But then there's the days where he doesn't. Dark circles under his eyes makes him look like an extra from Oliver. You know, as in: "Please sir, can I have some more?" Except, most days he doesn't ask for more. He's a picky eater. Mealtimes are a struggle. A struggle that I believe has been exacerbated by my separation from his Dad.

Filling in the Blanks

2011-03-27T11:58:00.002-04:00

Not that long ago, a commenter pointed out that reading my blog was like reading a book with missing chapters. I know. Sorry about that. I realize that many of details are lost, while I have gone on with the process of living; of taking care of myself and my kids while I rewrite the fairytale so many have come to know (including myself). So where do I begin? How do I catch you up on where my life

Ch-ch-changes

2011-03-22T16:49:00.000-04:00

For several weeks I was getting the feeling something was up. I can't explain how or why. Just something in my intuition was telling me changes were coming. Subversive comments have been made during conversations about the kids; blaming our current shared custody agreement as being at the root of his behavioral challenges with 8 y/o Hansel. Then I get the text... HIM: We need to talk when

An EXplanation for my Absence

2011-03-15T17:35:00.000-04:00

I've reconciled with one Ex. Another Ex is moving, most likely out of the state and to another part of the country. There's much transformation and evolution afoot. (Oh Yeah, I'm moving too. Don't know where yet. My landlord put my house up for sale in January.) Needless to say, there's been a lot to process and work through in the castle. It's terrifying. But all good. I promise. Stay tuned.

A Valentine for My Ex

2011-02-14T09:10:00.000-05:00

Today I am strong enough to face all my tomorrows, thanks to all of my yesterdays with you. Thank You. <3