THE WORLD OF FASHINGAA

EMPOWERMENT!!

2010-04-07T19:49:00.000-07:00

Aunt Christa went in to study nursing in the university....somewhere along the line, she met a man who later became her husband... Physically, he wasn't an attractive man but when asked by her close friend's and immediate family, she maintained that his personality was what mattered.. Besides, she said... 'He is also a doctor and we're in the same field'

Christa went along to marry this man and together, they built an empire.... He managed to establish a hospital in a remote village in Delta state Nigeria. Prior to this, residents of this village would have to travel far to the city to get medical attention but now,the whole village came to him instead.. he became nothing short of a messiah....

With the tremendous success of the hospital, he began opening branches in different rural neighborhoods for people who couldn't afford to travel long distances to go to hospitals in the city.... Eventually and over a period of time, he and his wife had managed to open several hospitals and pharmacies all over southern Nigeria... They were wealthy!!

Of course!! as is synonymous to the African culture, the husband took on the responsibility of seeing some of Aunt Christa's family member's through school... He even offered jobs to most of them in some of his numerous hospitals and pharmacies. A huge part of her family which had come from abject poverty now depended on Christa and her husband for their welfare...

Many years had passed and their marriage had produced two lovely kids...Then Christa decided to bring home her 18 year old niece from the village to train in school and help around the house as well...
Yes!! Yes!! You guessed right!! no surprise when our dear 'Unattractive but wealthy Doctor husband' started sleeping with this girl and he was at it for a while too before they got caught...
Now, how the cat was let out of the bag, i have no idea, but what i do know is that a lot of mayhem erupted from this shameless act.. The family was greatly disappointed and enraged at their son-in-law who had 'taken advantage of' and slept with Christa's NIECE!!!!

They called family meetings and repeatedly rebuked him for his actions.. Finally, the reaction we've all been waiting for... Christa's husband became angry and demanded some respect from her 'ungrateful' family members.. He would not take their insults anymore and as a matter of fact, was ready to MARRY the niece as a second wife if it was such a big deal...

WHAT??!! Christa couldn't believe her ears and neither could the members of her family who vehemently refused that he marry the little girl..

When it became apparent that they weren't going to give him their 'blessings', he went ahead to marry her anyway without their consent..At this point, the hurt and angry Christa who would not be a 'fellow wife' to ANYONE...especially not her own niece, decided to pack her things and leave...
Things went downhill from then on..

The 'husband' stopped paying the fees for her family member's whom he'd been training and he also fired each and every one of them from the job's he'd given them. He withdrew all favours and completely turned his back on Christa and all of her family..

Christa was completely helpless..No home, no money, no job...Nothing!! Yes....it's true that she and her husband had both worked for everything he owned but that didn't change the fact that she knew little about all the documents to the Properties, Cars etc which were all in his name by the way... She didn't even have a bank account of her own because she'd believed that since they were husband and wife, then they were one and as such should operate a joint account...

Now, she had access to NOTHING at all.... where would she start from?? Where??? after all these years???

*******************

Three years has passed since that incident and Christa as well as her ever supportive family are knocking on our dear husband's door and begging him to 'forgive her for leaving' and take her back. The suffering has been over-bearing and she has had to swallow her pride with a big glass of water...

Aunt Christa is my dad's Friend's cousin. (Hope I'm not confusing you) He told me this story yesterday and what immediately came to my mind was the thought that the importance of female empowerment cannot be stressed enough... If i was her,I'd be damned if I'd ever go back begging... I'd rather die than beg that fool after everything he did... but that's what Christa is doing right now and lets face it, so many factors are against her... Age, the ever deteriorating economy of Nigeria and most importantly, the will to start over..

We as women should learn from the mistakes of people like Aunt Christa.... we should learn to empower ourselves financially so that in the face of an event like this, we wouldn't be helpless.

It's not surprising how most women who even have jobs don't really have anything to show for it except a nice wardrobe, car and fancy things.Don't leave the money making decisions to your man to decide neither should you depend solely on him to survive..Anything can happen... Divorce, or even death of a spouse and then where does that leave you? and your kids if any?

For those of us who aren't married, the same thing applies to us. Even though we have boyfriend's that are willing to take care of us, we should be able to stand on our own two feet and be independent.
I know a girl who didn't wanna leave her boyfriend after all his physical abuse, cheating and ill-treatment, just because she depended on him for a lot of things... Money-wise i mean.

If men can do it, why can't we?? #Food for thought

Later Luvs...Kisses!!
F.

NNEKA-->CONCRETE JUNGLE

2010-02-12T02:33:00.000-08:00

Nneka was born and raised in Nigeria. she relocated to Hamburg, Germany, at the age of nineteen to pursue a career in singing along side a degree in Anthropology. Having landed in the German port, the singer hooked up with DJ and Hip-Hop beatmaker, DJ Farhot and ever since, their strong musical relationship has been the backbone of Nneka’s success. Her influences reflect her younger days in Nigeria as well as her time in the Western world. The distance she has travels shines through in her voice as does her diverse musical influences. She cites famous compatriot Fela Kuti and legend Bob Marley as well as contemporary rappers Mos Def, Talib Kweli, Mobb Deep and Lauryn Hill as key influences in her pursuit of musical recognition.

After finishing her debut EP “The Uncomfortable Truth” she toured Europe, commencing a long live schedule, performing to up to 6000 people at her later gigs, this young talent supported the likes of Femi Kuti, Seeed,Sean Paul and Gnarls Barkley. Performing all over Europe, from her adopted hometown of Hamburg to Holloway Prison in London.

Nneka’s album “Victim Of Truth” was released in September 2006 to rave reviews from the music press. The songs on the album provide a range of sounds from deep soulful ballads like ‘Confession’ to funky Hip-Hop tracks like ‘Stand Strong’ to ‘Changes’, which is a modern reinvention of the 90s UK soul sound.

Despite her Nigerian background, Nneka’s sound is strongly connected with her European journey.

“The way they dress, the way they carry themselves, their religion. So many things that are important to me are not important to them. For two years I was overwhelmed.”

This difference in ethical outlook comes to the fore in her music, with her social responsibility to her homeland of Nigeria laying heavy on her mind.

“I get inspired when I take a severe look at the things going on in our world today; especially in my country. How people live, suffer and endure pain, politics and religion, when I see all that man has evoked and created out of self-centeredness and devotion to material things”.

Nneka’s voice strikes an eerie balance between rage and pain which mirror’s the abrasion of two continents, Europe and Africa, within Nneka’s life so far. Nneka reiterates her humility in the face of her musical talents.

"I do not see myself as a performer but as somebody who shares her heartfelt feelings with others. I have fortunately by the grace of God, the oppurtunity to sing my message to you on stage"

She made an appearance recently on the David Letterman late night show...

I came across her music almost two years ago and i absolutely adore this woman... She's a brilliant singer...

She was scheduled to perform in Maryland and i was gonna go watch her but we had a freaking snowstorm and i was snowed in for a couple of days ..Hisssss

I've been on Twitter like crazy these days... It's not so dumb afterall..so follow me on Twitter luvs www.twitter.com/Fashinga *batting eyelashes* LOOOOL!!

Later Luvs...Kisses!!

WALE- MY SWEETIE VIDEO

2010-02-10T07:29:00.001-08:00

I was on twitter a few days ago when Wale dropped his new video..check it out...

IS HE REALLY BUSY?

2010-01-30T00:44:00.000-08:00

APPLE INTRODUCES IPAD

The Ipad by Apple is awesome, i watched an introductory video on it and it blew my socks off.

You can watch the video here to learn about the amazing features of Apple's latest invention.

SPRING 2010

It's the start of the Spring semester and as usual, these 'Lecturers' (As they call it in Nigeria) waste no time at all when it comes to handing out research papers and assignments... *sigh*

Right now, i'm in the library in school doing some research for the article i'm writing on 'plaigerism' for my school's paper... I just wanted to take the time out to say hey to my beloved readers... I made a resolution to not be a sporadic blogger this year and i'm gonna do evrything i can to keep it..

I was browsing through blogs last night and i went to Linda Ikeji's blog.. That is one dedicated blogger and she's constantly updating her blog.. I even noticed from her archives that her posts for January alone total '96'... Omg! lol... There are 31 days in a month and she already has 96? the month aint even over yet.. geezzz

IS HE REALLY BUSY OR JUST NOT THAT INTO ME?

"Baby" i said gently.... " why didn't you call me yesterday? Not even one call through out the whole day?! what happened?"

In a tone that i was all too familiar with, he said in deep rich baritone "I'm sorry Baby.. I had such a busy day . I was gonna call you as soon as i got home but i was sooooooo exhausted when i got back from work that i just dived into bed without even bothering to change"

I was quiet for a while as a myraid of thoughts were running through my mind.... By all indications, his excuses did seem quite genuine but how long was he gonna keep giving them?

We've been dating for five months and i can count how many times i've seen him cos he's always busy!! He's working two jobs and he's trying to get his MBA at the same time... His life is so choked up, it seems like he hardly has time for himself not to talk of me... or at least, that what he makes it look like..

We are at a point where making out time to see me is definitely not on his priority list. We live in the same state, but we see once in two weeks, if at all.

He tells me to be patient and that one day, all that is going to end. He would say things all the time about caring so much about me and missing me a lot but if he really did, wouldn't he wanna make time for me in his 'busy' life? Ultimately, actions speak louder than words and what I want to know is why? Why would he say things like this, but not even try to see me regularly?

Is he really busy or he's just not that into me... I wonder.. If he's so busy that he can't see me, then why did i see a tagged picture of him on facebook last weekend at a friend's graduation party? I thought he didn't have time for social events? Or the time that i called him that friday night when he was supposed to be stuck working late at the office and I could hear music in the background.

'Oh i see!! it turned out that you didn't have to work late anymore and u were gonna call me but as soon as you got home, your friends called and 'pressurized' u into going to have a couple of drinks huh? and you reluctantly obliged because it had been forever since u hung out with 'the guys' and u were gonna come see me but you were so wasted that it was all you could do not to pass out on your drive back home... ' Really? That's it? Can't you come up with something better like i didn't feel like seeing you and i lied about working late before i decided to spend the night with someone else...

See, what i don't get is why it's so hard for some guys and women to just come clean abt their feelings...If you're tired of a relationship, then why don't you save yourself the hassle by telling your significant other just that??.. You'd be free then to do whatever you want wouldn't u? I dunno, maybe it's bcos i'm such a blatantly honest person that doesn't like stress... if i feel like i'm not into someone, then i'll look for subtle ways to break it to him and save myself the stress of explaining why i'm so aloof these days, or why i don't call anymore, or i haven't made efforts to see him...

My Friends swear i'm being paranoid. pointing out that every time i've tried to leave, he keeps pulling me back and makes 'an effort' to change... but why should it have to be 'an effort?' shouldn't it come naturally? If you care abt someone then wouldn't u wanna be around them or call just to hear their voice... Life isn't that hard is it? hmmm i just can't figure men out... We truly are from different planets!!

WALE

Everyone who knows me, knows that i loooooooooooooooooooooove wale and i was so excited when i came across this song that he did for his Nigerian people... It features Bonnie Mack's (sierra leonne)- My sweetie...

I love the lyrics... had me LOL'ing especially when he tried to speak Yoruba

'Mix my Guinness with a doctor pepper.
She's so ibo, she's so sweet, shorty feed my ego
If your last name got thirteen letters, this is for you
Make my jollof with lots of pepper'

PATA PATA ON HONDA COMMERCIAL

Mariam Makeba's Pata Pata, was recently used for a honda commercial and it was soo great to see that even if she's gone, (RIP) her music, still lives on... I looooove that song. I've performed it with my band countless times... If you wanna watch the commercial, click here

I gotta go now my people, coming back soon i promise... Love u loadz!!!

Later luvs...Kisses!!

Lately...

2009-12-26T23:19:00.000-08:00

Hey folks.... Now first of all, i want to say a belated MERRY CHRISTMAS to evry one who reads my blog. you guys are the bomb and i hope y'all had mad fun, hope u didn't blame it on the alcohol and didn't get in any trouble...lol!!

As for me, my christmas was just ok. i did a shit load of cooking the night before and spent the next day entertaining a few of my friends that bothered to visit and then i went out to see a movie with my pumpkin who surprised me with a gift that i'd been wanting for a while now. i was soooo excited. like a kid with candy but that's another story...details later.

Umar farouk abdul-mutallab!!!! I'm sure by now a lot of u have fallen sick hearing this name but for the sake of those who haven't, let me give you a short and simple summary in my own words.

One stupid spoilt rich kid bearing the above name,who is an Engineering major and the son of the former chairman of the First bank of Nigeria decided to blow up a Northwest airline plane headed for Detroit MI on CHRISTMAS DAY.
The boy who is obviously an amateur wanna-be terrorist didn't quite carry out his plans well and luckily for the other passengers on the plane, one of the 'heroic' passengers was able to subdue him and put out the flames that had begun to rise up from the suspect's laps...
The boy who is now in custody of the FBI stated that he had gotten the 'explosive' (or whatever it was) and instructions on how to use it from YEMEN.
A CNN correspondent also reached the parents of the boy who said that the boy had always been very religious(Islam) since he was a child. They feared that he had met up with some extremists who may have led him to take such actions and blah blah blah... the story continues but you get the picture, a 23 year old NIGERIAN terrorist.

Now these are my thoughts on the matter.

First off, CNN wouldn't let us hear word again...they'll repeat the news 30 times in 30 mins and they just keep at it until u become nauseated! Tiger woods would be really happy now since nobody is talking about him and his bandwagon of mistresses anymore...*hiss* lol!

Obviously this stupid idiot son of a gun who is jobless and doesn't know what to do with his life,(pardon me, i just so vexed about the issue) has succeeded in adding to our long list of crimes. Just f***kin great!! We already have a grammy for unprecedented cocaine smuggling, corruption, fraud..419 if you may, and from now hence forth, terrorists. The annoying thing is that nobody cares if he's from the Nothern part of Nigeria...infact, some people don't even know his name. Since yesterday, na so so NIGERIA this, NIGERIAN that i don dey hear. we as a nation bear the stigma.

This guy don 'pour 'sand sand' for plenty people garri too.. i pity all those Nigerians with hopes of getting visas especially the ones with names like 'murtala' 'usman' 'waheedi' etc... The American embassy sure wouldn't be handing out visas anytime soon.

Random thought: It just hit me yesterday; the reason why the redskins and the cowboys are such huge opponents.... Redskins ( red indians) and the cowboys!! wow!! light bulb moment...lmao!!!!

I was just wondering a few days ago, what has happened to a few of our Nigerian movie stars that have been MIA for a while now. i wonder if they'll evr come back to the screen...for the Nigerians/africans that read this blog( the ones who watch home videos..like me...lol) let's have fun remembering them...shall we?

Victoria inyama
Does anybody remember this actress..i used to think she was really beautiful but a bit slow in her acting.. still loved her though.

Dolly unachukwu
She starred in movies like Glamour girls and Bora

Anne Njamanze
There's hardly any die hard naija movie lover who didnt see DOMITILLA. she was a pretty good actress...i miss her

Liz benson
What more can i see. a huge inspiration for many in Nigeria..absolutely adore her!!i heard she's an evangelist now.

Saint obi
he's been AWOL for a while now...i was sooo in love with him back in the day

Sandra Achums
LOVE HER!!

Keppy ekpeyong bassey
Where the hell is he?

Gloria Anozie

Loved her in 'black powder'

Emeka Ossai

This man often played the wife-beater and he always played the aggresive man in most of his movies... so i didnt really like him much...

Susan patrick

Charles okafor

Obot etuk
Do you remember her from 'confusion' and 'Nnneka the pretty serpent'? she was good.

Sola fosudo

and these are the few i remember for now... most of them have just disappeared into thin air...wish they would come back though and new talents would also be discovered. if i see Desmond elliot or Ini edo in one more movie eh?!!! i would pull my hair!!

Anyway, enough ranting for today...i gotta go to church tommorow so i'm about to get a quick shut-eye. Thanks to evryone who's been coming to my blog. i appreciate the love... y'all are the best...

I'll be back soon...

Later luvs...Kisses!!
F.

MY EPIPHANY...

2009-11-18T16:08:00.000-08:00

I had had a long and tiring day. It was the 26th of December in Port-Harcourt Nigeria...
We had a party that day every year to mark two occasions;my younger sister's birthday, and Christmas..
As always, i welcomed that day with mixed feelings..

EXCITEMENT; Because it was always so much fun,lots of food and drinks,friends,family and my parents were always in a good mood..

DREAD: Because of the enormous amount of work we had to do in preparation for the party...All the cooking( I was always the one in charge of scaling and cleaning the fish..ugh!! I hated that with all my heart but it wasn't exactly as if i had a choice) Worse still, the part i dreaded the most, was cleaning up after everyone had gone. Stacking up the party chairs, picking up bottles and plates littered all over the garden, and the grand finale WASHING THE DISHES!!! Once again, i usually was the one given the job of washing the plates and THE POTS( Must i remind you how hard it was with all the charcoal from cooking with firewood...)
When i asked my mum why we had to cook with firewood,(because honestly, i thought only village women cooked with firewood)she answered that since we were cooking in large quantities with such big pots, it would be impossible to cook in the kitchen plus "The smoke from the firewood enters the food and gives it a special flavor" she said...

Anyway, at about 1:21 am, i was done washing up and i went to bed exhausted...I woke up a few minutes later to the sound of a door slamming..Alarmed, i tried to get up and see what it was but to my dismay,i found out that i couldn't move..My hands, legs, mouth, head, every part of my body was non-responsive.I started panicking and since i didn't know what else to do, i started praying and calling the name of Jesus over and over again until after a while it released me. Long after that alarming incidence, i was still awake and i couldn't summon the courage to go back to bed.

" My dear... I think you've been watching too much home videos... I knew it!! All these Nigerian movies are not healthy for you...all they talk about is witches and wizards and now, you've started having hallucinations that are a spin off from what you watch... I've told you always to..."

"Mummy!!!!!" I screamed impatiently, getting frustrated from all her rantings...the woman didn't seem to believe what i was saying "I was not hallucinating ok? Neither was i dreaming... I swear, the first thing i saw, was a bright light and i heard a door slamming. after that, i couldn't move!! I'm scared cos what happened to me, had an evil aura about it"

Following that, was an uncontrollable bout of laughter from my mum.... she apparently thought that my brain had gone into overdrive and i had started imagining things...My Mum didn't believe in witchcraft or demons and i knew right then and there that i had wasted my time telling her...

In search for answers, i related the same story to my aunt who was far more helpful than my mum...
" Fashinga, i know exactly what you're talking about because i have first hand experience... It's been happening to me for ten years now and the only thing you can do is prayer, prayer and more prayer... What you experienced is a demon sitting on you..."

My eyes widened when i heard this and she continued.. " Yes, when you sleep in a certain way, the demon comes and sits on your back, so you can't move.. It is called oppression by the devil. Whenever something good is about to happen in your life, he sends his agents to come and take away all your riches, take your destiny and he gives you bad luck...that is why you have to pray and fight it whenever it comes your way. "

After that day, "the devil" kept "sitting on my back" very frequently...i was scared to fall asleep and i was slowly starting to lose my mind...At some point, my aunt took me to her church for deliverance....this, she said, would drive the devil away.
I would never forget that experience in my life.. I felt like one of those people who were possesed by demons...why else would i be going for DELIVERANCE?. didn't that mean casting out demons?
Anyhoo, after the session, it stopped coming and i was able to sleep well for about 6 months but alas, "The devil" returned...

Somewhere along the line, i got tired of it and accepted it as part of me, my remedy? simple....when "The devil" came, i would struggle with it for a while,bind and cast him away,clutch my bible and go back to sleep.

I've lived like this for 8 years now until last week,when i made a shocking discovery. I was browsing through google when i stumbled on a heading 'Sleep paralysis'. i thought that sounded interesting so i clicked on the link.. what i found out is too voluminous to put down here...

There are millions of people all over the world who have been experiencing the same thing that i've been experiencing for 8 years of my life now.. most of the experiences differ slightly but we have one thing in common...The fact that when it happens, you can't move....you are completely paralysed!!

People from various cultures have different beliefs: My aunt called it oppresion by the devil, some people say that when you go to bed, your spirit leaves your body and when you wake up, because your spirit hasn't returened yet, you can't move...some people say it's a demonic visitation.. Others call it alien abduction and so on and so forth...

'Ignorance is a disease' was the phrase that came to my mind when i was reading about this medical condition called 'Sleep paralysis'.

"Sleep paralysis occurs when the brain awakes from a REM state, but the body paralysis persists. This leaves the person fully conscious, but unable to move. The paralysis can last from several seconds to several minutes "after which the individual may experience panic symptoms and the realization that the distorted perceptions were false"

If you wanna find out more about this, click here

All these years, i have lived in ignorance!! Believing that the devil has been sitting on me... The truama i went through, thinking i was one of the few people in the world who experience this....I was even scared to tell any of my friends so they won't think i have spiritual problems... I decided to share this discovery with you guys for some of you who have been experiencing this but have never really gotten answers... until last week, i was also ignorant... some of you might have heard of this, some might have not but for those of you who are experiencing this or know people who are, i would love to hear your stories...

In the light of other news, my luvs... I know i have'nt been here for a while now, and sooooooo much has happened in my life for such a short period of time... lots of gist coming your way....trust me!! *wink* lol....

I missed you guys loadzzzzzz..........kisses luvs!!

F.

Wedding Bells.....

2009-08-09T16:10:00.000-07:00

Robert Peters!! When you hear that name...what comes to mind?? He's a tall, dark, and handsome hunk known for his fierce bad boy look and his deep rich baritone...Remember him?? i"m sure lovers of Nigerian home videos will... He used to thrill the ladies and make the guys envious back when he was on screen...Well, he's been away from the movie scene for some years now. He currently resides in America and he's into film making and documentary...

Robert is a very good friend of mine and someone i hold very close to my heart...I'm sure even he doesn't know that...lol!! I dedicate this post to this wonderful person who always makes me smile...

Robert Peters just tied the knot very recently in Atlanta GA to a very beautiful woman who is also an artiste from the congo...She is an actress and musician who is known as 'Soleil Diva'

Below are some pics from the glamorous wedding

Robert to me, can be defined as a brilliant mix of dexterity, articulation and intellect.. He was and still remains one of my favorite actors and one of the warmest people i have ever known. Robert peters.. You are an amazing person, someone i don't regret knowing... I'm so happy for you...Congratulations on your marriage...May GOd give both of you the grace, endurance, understanding and all it takes to make your union last...

My dear readers...and fellow citizens of blogsville....Thanks for stopping by and leaving your wonderful comments...they mean a lot to me...I'll be back soon...Love you guys..

Later Luvs...Kisses!!
F.

When Catastrophe struck..

2009-07-06T13:20:00.000-07:00

So i took some time off blogging to mourn the loss of the king of pop MJ.

Yeah right!! That's totally a lie.. What?! I could'nt think of any other excuse to give you guys..I know i've been bad lately. Blogging sporadically, not replying to comments and hardly making my blog rounds. I'm so sorry luvs, please forgive me. I've been working like crazy and i havent had the time but i promise to change..Also, i would like to thank everyone who left a comment on my post, The case of the Ex. Your words meant soooo much to me and i'm proud to say that i've moved on with my life. I took your advice and i'm not even in contact with him right now. Just what i needed.. I'm sending you guys hugs right back!!

That being said, I got a call from my sister two days ago and long after we'd finished talking, i was in shock and incredibly thankful to God for my life..
My luvs,here's the gist...

My sister called me and said "Fashinga, do you remember what happened to you some years ago at the Presidential hotels in Portharcourt?"
After she refreshed my memory, i responded "Yes i do..Why?" and then she proceeded to tell me the shocking story.. I know i'm confusing you guys right now but let me start from the begining.

A few years ago, my uncle who was in America, had sent me some money via western union and after collecting the money, i had gone to a particular 'mallam'(Mallam usually signifies muslim men from the north of Nigeria) friend of mine who was into 'bureau de change' to convert the money to Naira.

When i was done, as i was about to cross the street to where there was a gathering of 'okada'(Okada is the Nigerian term for motorcycle) drivers, i noticed a sleek black landcruiser jeep with dark tinted windows that stopped for me to cross.

After crossing I had taken a few steps when i heard someone call me from behind.

"Hey, hey.. Excuse me miss."

So i turn around to see who's calling. He's a tall, skinny, dark skinned man.. About 6ft 2.. His eyes were bloodshot looking and his palms looked very hard and calloused. He was dressed respectably in a blue, buttoned up longsleeved shirt and black khaki pants.

"Yes, how can i help you" I said

" I'm sorry to take up your time" he said politely "but did you happen to notice the car that stopped for you to cross the road?"
i nodded and he continued " Well, i'm the driver of that car. My boss noticed you as you crossed, and he likes you so he asked me to come and speak to you"

"Is that so? What about?" I asked very disintrestedly.

He smiled cockily and edged a little closer to me, speaking in a lower tone " You see sister, my boss is a very rich man. He is a white expatriate and he's doing business in Nigeria. You are very lucky to have caught his attention"

I arched my eyebrow when i heard that and the guy continued " I tell you, my Oga spends 'dollars.'( With emphasis on dollars. My Nigerian people will understand what i mean by this) He will shower you will lots of dollars and all he wants right now is for you to have lunch with him.."

I laugh for a few seconds and say " Look, i dont have time for all this, as you can see, i was going somewhere and i'm very busy. Tell your oga i'm not interested in his dollars" and with that, i turned to leave but he held me back

" I know you're a wise girl and you won't let this oppurtunity pass you by"

I wanted to give him a rude comeback and tell him to buzz off, but i changed my mind. Instead i said " Ok i have heard you.. I will go out with your oga but i cant follow you all the way to your car, people will notice me. Why dont you go and turn around? i'll wait right here for you"

He seemed pleased to hear that, and as soon as he turned around, i walked straight to where an okada was parked and boarded one home without looking back...

Now that you know about the 'incident' that my sister was reffering to, let me fastfoward to the future.

My sister called to tell me that a particular cousin of mine had been involved in a very similar incident that turned out to be almost fatal.

Now let me a little background info on this cousin of mine.. She's a very lively and fun person to be with. she doesnt take life too seriously and believes in her policy " There's only one life to live so live it to the fullest!"

She loves adventure and Men! Yes men! She's the type that would follow friends to parties out of state if she heard that there was gonna be a loaded guy from 'abraod' that she could possibly land.

So that fateful day, a similar thing had happened to her but knowing my cousin, it was no surprise to hear that she followed the so called 'driver' to the car but unfortunately for her, the supposed 'white' man that she expected to meet, turned out to be two hefty guys who immediately put a bag over her head when she got into the car. According the her, (from what my sister said) the last thought on her mind before she passed out was "Oh my God. I'm going to die"

She (my cousin) said she woke up in a room in a dark uncompleted building to find six other girls. they all had their hands tied to their backs and some were crying hysterically.. It immediately hit her that she had been caught by ritualists.

Well, let me cut the long story short 'cos this post is getting too lenghty...
They had come to take her away to perhaps meet her death and she was taken to a Native doctor who was supposed to perform some ritual before they hack her into pieces.But when she got there, the Native doctor looked at her strangely and told the other guys that her spirit was not good and if they used her for the medicine, she would spoil it and it wouldnt work.
So they were instructed to take her back. After they dropped her back in the room, she was exchanged with another girl,leaving just her and one more girl remaining. Before they left, she heard one of the guys telling another that they still had to kill her anyway.

When they left, the guy who was supposed to be guarding them had left probably to take a piss for a few mins so with survival on her mind, she decided to take a chance at escaping. Since she had been left untied, she helped the other girl out of the rope that bound her hands and they both slipped thru the open door and ran for their lives. The guy that was supposed to be gaurding them soon discovered that they had escaped and so he started running after them. She said the most shocking for her was when the guy threw an axe and it hit the other girl on the back. As she heard the blood chilling scream of the other girl as she fell, tears clouded her eyes and she just kept running as fast as her legs could take her without even pausing to look back..

Finally, she got to a clearing where she found two women fishing in the pond. So she frantically begged them to help her. They took her in their boat and she later found out that she was in a village called Omoku in Rivers state on the outskirts of Portharcourt.. With the help of the two women, she got to a motor park where she was able to board a bus back to portharcourt.

My sister told me that my cousin is still in shock and was just able to tell the story 'cos she hasnt been able to speak for a while now.

After what i heard, i was also in shock and still am, but for different reasons.. I kept thinking of what happened to me and how i left and took an okada home.
I kept wondering what would have become of me, had i entered that car. Would i have been as lucky as my cousin was,or would i be long gone now. I just thank God for saving my life as well as the life of my cousin though she learnt the hard way.

I'm sure God let her go through the experience to teach her a lesson. As for me, all those years of my mother telling me "Dont follow people you dont know" paid off. I was not phased by the 'white' man or the 'dollars'. And these guys (ritualists) use these techniques to lure Nigerian girls.

Well all i can do is just thank God because, there would have been no Fashinga by now and i wouldnt have met wonderful people like you guys..lol!!

I won't be gone for long again! I promise..Thanks for your comments and love..It means soo much to me. I LOVE YOU!

Later Luvs..Kisses!!
F.

Micheal Jackson is Dead!!

2009-06-25T16:33:00.000-07:00

I just came back from work and settled down to update my blog. On a whim, i turn on my T.v set and switch to CNN only to find the headlines reading 'MICHEAL JACKSON IS DEAD".
Immediately, my heart ctapulted to my chest.. I stared at the TV set in shock for about 15 mins and before i knew it, tears had started rolling down my cheek. I mean, i never thought that i would ever cry for someone i didnt even know personally but i just couldnt help it. Micheal has influenced millions of people around the globe and he remains the greatest artiste ever.

Through his evergreen songs, he has touched souls, changed lives and inspired great talents all over the world. He is a LEGEND and will be remembered for decades to come. My heart is aching for the loss of this great man who died at the tender age of 50. DAmn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Too sad

This post is dedicated to you MICHEAL. May your soul rest in perfect peace.

The Case of the Ex (Long Post)

2009-06-13T09:45:00.000-07:00

" I can't take this anymore Kenny..I'm tired of your constant comparison of the two of us. I'm not her and i will never be her. If you love her so much, how come you're with me and not her. You know what, why dont you go sort yourself out ok?"

A few split seconds later, the sound of my phone hitting the wall with a loud crash filled my eardrums.

Some moments later, as i scuttled over to pick up and piece together the parts of my phone, i felt the tears that i had been trying so hard to hold back trickle down my cheeks, and before long, i was crying hysterically. Why did i love him so damn much? Why did he keep expecting me to be like her? Wasn't i trying my best?

In just a short while, he had broken through my defenses and taken a strong hold of my heart and now it seemed everything he did was with an intention to hurt me.

You see, he was hurting as well...He was hurting for different reasons...He was hurting because of her... "The Ex".

Where do i start? Well, let me start from the beginning

************************************
He was barely months out of the relationship and he couldn't get past the fact that it was over.. A few months after their break-up, he met me and we instantly hit it off.
I was enamored by his charms. He was all i wanted in a man. Handsome, Intelligent, understanding, caring and much more. We had a great connection and the 'chemistry' between us was strong.
After a few weeks, as i got to know more about him, i learnt about 'her'. It had been over for seven months now he said.He had apparently hurt her a lot and he felt guilty for the pain he caused her. Even though I could see that he still had feelings for this woman, i reasoned that it was realistic since he had been with her for years before the break-up. I could empathize with him, knowing how long it took me to get over my Ex as well.

I Ignored all the warning bells that warned me of the heart-wrenching pain that was to come and i proceeded to care for this man. It was not my intention to fall in love with him. No it was not my Intention to give my all to him.. I was caught unawares that day when he softly whispered "I Love you" into my ears as he held me close to him...

I didn't realize it at the time,call it stupidity or whatever but i now i see that i was his rebound. The first person he'd run to after 'her'. He needed someone to help him get over her. Someone to help erase the memories of her from his head. A substitute for her, and i unfortunately was that person.

As time progressed, he constantly expected me to act like her, think like her... so much so that he couldn't even see the unique person that i was.. Nothing i did appealed to him as long as i didn't do it like 'her'..It hurt me so darn much to see that i wasn't appreciated for who i was. I had lost that sweet and sensitive man i met at first.. All i saw was this frustrated man, who complained about everything i did. Why couldn't i just leave then?? I asked myself everyday while crying on my bed.. I loved him so much and i couldn't explain it.

A few weeks after, we had a long talk and decided to take a break from our 'farce' of a relationship, and settle for being just friends. 'Cos in truth, all he ever saw me as was a friend not a lover..
In the safety of my room, i cried over and over again.. something that had somewhat become a routine. The thing is he never saw me cry because i was always sure to put up a strong appearance when i saw him. I'd never let him think I'm weak..NEVER.

He calls me two days later and we decide to meet up. I was happy when i saw him and for a moment, i was oblivious to any pain. We laughed, talked and for the time being, the frustrated and depressed part of him was gone thankfully.

But a few hours later, my mood changes as I'm reminded by my forlorn heart all to soon that he never loved me like he'd claimed to. this mood swing does not go unnoticed and he too soon catches the bug..

"Don't get me wrong, i care about you. you have no idea.. but i've never loved anybody as much as i love her. All the time we haven't been together, i've been trying so hard to pretend that everything is all right but its not. I can't live without her. My life is meaningless and nothing interests me anymore.I just want to die! I just want to end my life!" He said all these to me in between sobs as he violently shook in my arms from crying.

I tried as much as i could to console him while my heart broke into a thousand pieces. I'm hurting so bad.. To love him so much and realize that whatever feelings he had claimed to have for me were all lies and she was the only one he loved with all his heart...

He begged me to help him talk to her, he said he's told her the way he feels for her but maybe she'd change her mind if she hears it from someone else.. but can i really go and convince another woman to take back the man that i love?

It hurts to know that all the times he spent with me, he really just wanted to be with her. All the good times we had, when we would laugh and play was all 'pretense' like he said. All the times he looked in my eyes and said he loved me, he was lying through his teeth.

What have i done wrong to him, to deserve this pain.. I don't blame him though. I blame this foolish thing called love, that makes people do stupid things without thinking. Once again, I'm a victim.

I told him i'll always be there for him, and i'll always be his friend to see him through his pain even though its killing me.. but must he think that I'm void of feelings?
This is the end of the road for me. I need some relief from this hurt that i feel. I need a release..

VOO-DOO OR GIFT?? YOU TELL ME..

2009-04-30T22:25:00.000-07:00

Hey Luvs!!! I know, I Know….Before you say anything, I just want to say that there’s been sooooo much stuff going on in my life and I’m sorry that I’ve not updated my blog for about a month now, thanks to everyone who’s been coming every now and then to check up on me ….Y’all are the best.

Honestly, there is so much that I need to get sorted out in my life right now, and I’ve been extremely busy. I’ve hardly had time for myself, and I haven’t been on blogger in a long time as well.

I made up my mind that I was gonna post something today, and I already started it as a draft yesterday, but something really spectacular happened today and I just had to blog about it….I AM F**KING FREAKED OUT RIGHT NOW. My hands are shaking even as I type….

Let me give you a rundown on how it started…

I had gone to the cafeteria in school to get something to eat after classes, ‘cos I was mad hungry… I sat down to enjoy my meal with a friend of mine, (my friend’s name is Timmy) when this Guy walks by... My friend calls out to him, says hi, and then turns to me and says:
“Fashinga, this guy right here is really gifted…he has the gift of mind reading”

Of course, I scoff and go “Yeah Right…don’t we all”

Timmy says” I’m telling you…for real. I had the same reaction when I first met him too but this dude will read your mind”

I look ‘dude’ up and down uninterestedly... He’s about 5 ft 5” short; dark skinned African American, cute, but has a weird look about him… After sizing him up, I turn back to my food…sighing heavily…I’m thinking, I have better things to do with my time, and so many important things on my mind, to be wasting time with this joker…

After Timmy’s constant and quite annoying prodding, I decide to give him a try and I politely ask him to take the seat directly opposite me...

After he sits down, he tells me to take off my glasses so he can ‘look into my eyes’, and then he says “ First of, we’re gonna start with what I call, the question and answer session…As it is, I don’t know you so any question will be hard, but I want you to dig deep and ask me a question that I would never know”

I don’t think too hard, and then I ask him casually “What’s my mother’s name?”

He smiles, in a very freaky way and scribbles something in a piece of paper that he’d already cut out... When he’s done writing, he balls up the paper and passes it to Timmy, and then he asks me to say it. (My Mum’s name)

Arching my brow cockily, I mouthed the words “Stella…That’s her name”

Dude smiles again and asks Timmy to reveal what was in the balled up paper…Timmy showed it to me and my jaw literally fell to the floor!!!! He did not only get my mum’s name, but her maiden name and her husband’s name as well… Mind you, even Timmy does not know my Mum’s name...

I sat up in my chair this time but I was still not convinced…u know how it is with us humans…we’re so doubtful. I asked him a couple more questions like ‘who was my first love?’ ‘what was my nickname in high school’ and some other ’personal’ questions that NO ONE…I repeat NO ONE in this world but me knows, and he got them all right.

At this point, people had started gathering round our table and soon audible shrieks of ‘wow!!’ and ‘damn’ could be heard, as he was doing the same thing to other people..

I was finally convinced, but that was not even what freaked me out…while he was wowing others…I was quietly thinking to myself, this dude must surely have some evil powers…
At that moment, he stopped what he was doing and stared me straight in the eyes, like he could see through me... I felt my heartbeat accelerate for a second and then he said

“No, my dear…I’m not evil, I don’t worship the devil so stop thinking that...” That, my dears, was my undoing. I mean, How the F**k did he know what I was thinking??

I immediately stood up from the chair and almost ran out of the place; I could hear a girl scream “get out of my head” as I left.

Timmy quickly caught up with me as I left, laughing hysterically and saying “I told you so” over and over again

You see, Timmy believes that this guy is gifted by God and his powers are in No way evil… Now, I’m not a superstitious person but this is what I believe. Its either Good or evil… and the vibe I was getting from that guy was not very good at all.

Maybe, it’s the way he looks at you, like he can see everything in your head, and the very freaky way he smiles, when he’s read your mind… I don’t know but regardless of Timmy saying “Puh-lease…there is no such thing as evil powers. They are gifts from God and it is left for the recipient to decide if he or she wants to use it for good or bad”

Yeah right!!! Hear hear!! Call me ignorant…I don’t really care but its not everyday you see someone who can tell you exactly what you’re thinking..
All I know is, I’m going to church on Sunday to prayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. Lol!!

I’m sorry that this post was this lengthy…I don’t really like lengthy posts myself. I promise that I won’t be gone this long again.

So what do you guys think?? Voodoo or gift?

Later Luvs…Kisses!!!
F.

Gist Mistress..

2009-04-02T23:30:00.000-07:00

Wazzup people!! Ki lon happen? (What's happening?)I know my title is corny but i couldnt think of any title (WHAT!!)

I'm super pissed right now...Pissed i say. Can you imagine?? All my plans to fool people on April 1st, proved abortive and i'm still fuming.. No on fell for my pranks...NO ONE!!!!!

Anyway, all in all, i've had an exciting week so far..I'm gonna start performing at this cool new place every friday and the pay is good.

So I shot a commercial two days ago for an Insurance company in Dc (District of columbia) and it was mad fun.. It was meant to be a funny commercial and we had to do a little acting.. So here's the concept..

A guy leaves his girlfriend (Me) for a another chick, but the girlfriend is not letting him off easily..In her bid to get him back, she and her sidekicks (her two gangster friends) threaten to key his car (Interpretation: bash/dismantle the body of his car..lol) if he doesnt come back to her..But the dude is not phased by her hysterical threats because of the reliability of his insurance company since the car is fully insured..

Simple concept, but definitely hilarious..and i had to play the crazy ass enstranged girlfriend..

Anyway here's a random question: Why is London called Jand and America called Yankee??

Ok let me give y'all a little gist. I met this guy at a party last week..Nice guy, gorgeous.. you know, very smooth and suave(maybe not so much..hehehe) Found out he was a Nigerian..

We got talking and i got to find out more about him.. He organizes shows/concerts and brings artistes like D'banj,Tu face and the likes of them here to perform..Apparently, my band had performed at one of the shows he sponsored last year and i didnt even know it (Small world eh?)

Quite frankly, with what i'd learnt about him, i was more interested in discussing business, than pleasure and i made that very clear.( I mean, he was cute and all, but for some reason, i just wasnt feeling him...something was amiss.) We talked business for a while, exchanged contacts and things were going quite well..

Just when the deal was finalized and i was about to contemplate discussing 'pleasure',this dude made the biggest mistake ever..He started feeling on me!! We were sitting at the time, and he edged closer to me, breathing down my neck,and he was running his hands all over my thighs in the most disgusting way ever.. Blatant lust written all over him (Ok i admit..i'm quite sexy..lmao!! but get a hold of yourself man!!!) Whatever gave him the idea that acting like that was cool ( Well maybe it is, if its done right!!)
Now one thing about me is that i get grossed out easily and having a dude feel me out like that especially when i'm just meeting him for the first time is a big NO NO. call me wierd but wareva men!! lol

I won't tell you how that episode ended..Not because i dont want to, but because i'm so lazy right now and my fingers are tired..plus, i dont really like long posts..
All i can say is, that dude has been blowing up my phone like crazy and No, he's not interested in continuing our business conversations at least not until he gets some..I dont even care men!! he can go to hell for all i care..Why are men like that??? (Ok, sorry Roc, Danny and all the other males reading this) but still..All guys wanna do is 'DO'..lmao!!

To all y'all who've left me comments, viewed my page, or even come here by mistake sef...I just wanna say...You guys Rock!!!! I apreciate the love... These kisses are for you, straight from the heart!!

Later Luvs!!!

F.

TAGGED !!! BY BSNC... HONEST SCRAP SOMETHING...

2009-03-26T23:34:00.000-07:00

So i've been tagged by BSNC..I think it means i have to be honest or something..I dont even know..lol!! Anyway, sit back relax and enjoy..Wait!! I think you should also pop some popcorn while you're at it. hehe

1. I'm a twin!! Oh this is a honest scrap meme?? Dang!! I forgot..Ok, i'm not a twin but i was supposed to be one only that my twin sister decided at the last minute that she didnt wanna follow me on this life's journey and she dissapeared from the womb right b4 we heard the doctor say PUSH!!!..COWARD!! lol

2. I hate Ironing with a passion..I only do it 'cos i have to..My mum knows how much i hate it and when i was younger, if she wanted to punish me, she would give me loads of clothes to iron..arrgh..That woman!!!

3. Ok, i'm only writing this as an after thought...Most times before i go somewhere, especially if i'm going on a date, I picture the scenario in my head and sometimes, even act it out in front of a mirror...I also practice my 'killer' smile..One flash and you're hooked..Guys be warned..lol

4.Speaking of mirrors, Damn!!!! i love Mirrors to death...I think it was created for me..I can spend hours in front of a mirror admiring myself..(I'm vain..I know) Dont blame me, you would admire me too if you were me.( Wait! Did that last sentence make any sense?? *scratching my head* lol!!)

5.I'm singer..Not a recording artiste put i play gigs,shows etc..with my band..Temite, when you and FBA decide to start a family, just call my container number and i'll come and sing at your baby's dedication.

6.I can be very impatient sometimes..Honestly!! The thing i hate most in the world is waiting for something or somebody.It makes my blood boil and i get real mad!!! Although, there's been only one time where i could'nt even dare be mad..It was when i was at the US embassy in Lagos..I got there 6am and left 6pm..I waited eh!!!Omo!! I jus recpect myself jejely..i cant fit shout..That place humbles u men!! lol

7.In my lifetime, i had crushes on so many celebrities, i cant even count..When i was twelve, i got married to RMD in my head..Since then, I've had kids with Goerge Clooney, gone to Hawai with Enrique Iglesias and grown old with Jim Iyke..all in this head of mine..My present crush is Banky W.. Please any one who knows him should tell him to marry me..

8. Did i mention i'm also an aspiring author..I've finished my first book titled REFLECTIONS. COMING SOON from the Fashinga stables..Very soon i'll be saying "GO GRAB YOUR COPY NOWWWWWWWWW"

9. I love drinking Garri and groundnut or fried fish..Even when my house is overflowing with food, i'll still prefer drinking garri...I dunno, i get some pleasure from It..I wear prescribed glasses..Mumsy has been blaming the Garri for years..Wareva men..lol

10. Finally we're on number ten!! phew! I thought we were never gonna get there..hmmm let me see.Aha!! I cant swim..(Yes close your mouth.When did you learn how to swim? *hiss* lol) I mean, i decieve myself that i can but deep down, i know i cant swim to save my life! I'll just be dabbling in the shallow side of the pool pretending like i'm only there cos i love hanging out with 'the kids'..I never saunter to the deep part..Who dash me mind?

Now's the part where i have to tag 7 sweethearts..I Tag Rocnaija, Africanweightlossdiva,Original mgbeke,Nigerian Drama Queen,Shonvixen,Temite and Misslove..

PS: My heartfelt thanks to all of you who wished me a happy birthday yesterday..God knows you made my day.You guys are the best. Luv y'all.

Later luvs...Kisses!!
F.

Happy Born-day to meeeeeeeeeeee!!!!

2009-03-25T04:09:00.000-07:00

*Singing in my nightingale voice* "Fashinga's a jolly good fellow, Fashinga's a jolly good fellow, Fashinga's a jolly good fellowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww and so says all of them.."

My Dear citizens of Blogsvillage, and even foreigners..Its your girls 'baiday' so rejoice with me as i get a year older..

I'm so thrilled right now, that i dont really know what to say but hopefully, i'll be back to post gist on how it went..

Blame it on the A-a-a-a-a-alchohol!!!!! lol!!!!!!!!!!!

Later luvs...Kisses!!!
Fashinga.

Vanilla Romance...

2009-03-16T15:15:00.001-07:00

I'm staring at you,
Longing for you....
My anticipation building with the passing of every second
I can hear a consistent thud as the sound of my heartbeat gets louder
You're teasing me... Making me yearn for you
I so badly want to feel you in my mouth
The sweet sensation of tasting you with my tongue

I'm in my seventh heaven
Beside myself with pleasure
I try to resist you...
oooh i can’t take this anymore
I've got to have you

Slowly I advance
My tongue slithering over my lips
A resounding groan ensues from the gut of my throat
I close my eyes for a second
Images of you fill my head....
Creamy, velvety, and oh so sweet...

"Excuse me miss?? Are you going to order that shake you've been staring at?" her harsh voice intruding on my thoughts.

My eyes jerk open and the cashier is staring at me with utter amazement....

Shrugging, I give into temptation "Yes, I’ll have the vanilla shake" but this will be the last time, I thought to myself..I've got to resist your 'vanilla' charm...

Hehehehehhehehehehe... I fooled y'all didn’t I??

Later Luvs...Kisses!!!
F.

Blogocracy!!

2009-03-11T14:45:00.000-07:00

Fellow citizens of Blogsvillage!! Blogsvillage is abuzz oh...Everywhere i go, everywhere i turn,Naija Bloggers Award stares me in the face...

I went to Solomonsydelle's blog to see how the mummy of three was doing but the first thing i saw was one big sign stating that she's a nominee..She was even reminding us that she's a mummy of three just incase we'd forgotten..Na wa o..
Ehen!! i even forgot to mention that she made a video on youtube as well..

Next, i visited Temite. You wont believe what i found out..She was contemplating suicide (she claimed it was an epiphany...Imagine!!!) because she was'nt nominated for any award in category A. It took the grace of God to get her to change her mind..Nevertheless, she has decided to relocate to Nigeria all because of the awards( i dirint talking anytin o)

Still stunned at the extent Temite was willing to go, my next stop was her boo's blog (This kain blogger love na wa o) The very Jazz man of blogsvillage, FineBoyAgbero. That one wrote a letter to ifa. He was just blasting jazz for anybody who doesnt vote for him..if you see what i saw eh, my mouth can't fit talk it.

What's worse?? Wordmerchant aka Fatty Bombom is tring to lose weight just so she can be nominated for an award in category B...Hmmm it is wa O!!! Thank God my dearest Africanweightlossdiva is here to help her with the tips..hehehe

Did i tell y'all that Afrobabe wants to lose weight bcos of this award too..she's going on a special cabbage diet. Go on the weightlossdiva's blog to find out more. Meanwhile, speaking of Afro, even she's not left out o..She promised to partially unveil herself if we vote for her. She's even trying to be a good girl...ah ah!!! In her words, she says "Kini big deal" (Afro baby, we cant be fooled)

Bumight has kept up with shouting Furst!!!! on everybody's blog and she's even offering to be Mama Bomboy's campaign manager...ehen!! lest i forget, you guys better vote for her o..we all know she's a cry cry baby.

After seeing all these things, i'm about to start my own campaign too.. I dont know if there's any category for new bloggers , but if there is, una better nominate me or else.......Dont worry there's plenty chingum for whoever votes for me.
Join the Winning parry.. FBP!! (Fashingaa's Blogocratic Parry)..

But dont forget, this is Blogocracy...hanything can appen.. I have started accepting bribes..just call my container number for more details..

FBP!!! FBP!!! Na we get the votes..

Ps: I heard that a very fast way to lose weight is to get a bottle of freshly squeezed lime and a bottle of original honey..They should both be boiled (mixed) for 15 mins and kept refrigirated. Then you should take a glass of this mixture everyday for a week (depending on how much weight you want to lose sha). My informant said you will drop from 200kg to 120 in a week..but the downside is that taking No.2's will become your hobby (N0.2 means shyting..lol). Abeg me i dont know how true this is o..Weightlossdiva...help me on this one..

Later luvs...Kisses!!
F.

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus..

2009-02-28T06:01:00.000-08:00

GOOD INTENTIONS ARE NOT ENOUGH

Falling in love is always magical. It feels eternal, as if love will last forever. We naively believe that somehow we are exempt from the problems our parents had, free from the odds that love will die, assured that it is meant to be and that we are destined to live happily ever after.

But as the magic recedes and daily life takes over, it emerges that men continue to expect women to think and react like men, and women expect men to feel and behave like women. Without a clear awareness of our differences, we do not take the time to understand and respect each other. We become demanding, resentful, judgmental, and intolerant.

With the best and most loving intentions, love continues to die. Somehow the problems creep in. The resentments build. Communication breaks down. Mistrust increases. Rejection and repression result. The magic of love is lost.

A while ago, i read a great book called "Men are from mars, women are from Venus(or vice/versa)" and a few days ago, i was reminiscing on the confrontational moments i had with my Ex. The days when we used to argue over the silliest things.

REMEMBERING OUR DIFFERENCES (excerpt)

"Without the awareness that we are supposed to be different, men and women are at odds with each other. We usually become angry or frustrated with the opposite sex because we have forgotten this important truth. We expect the opposite sex to be more like ourselves. We desire them to "want what we want" and "feel the way we feel."

We mistakenly assume that if our partners love us they will react and behave in certain ways-the ways we react and behave when we love someone. This attitude sets us up to be disappointed again and again and prevents us from taking the necessary time to communicate lovingly about our differences.

Men mistakenly expect women to think, communicate, and react the way men do; women mistakenly expect men to feel, communicate, and respond the way women do. We have forgotten that men and women are supposed to be different. As a result our relationships are filled with unnecessary friction and conflict.

Clearly recognizing and respecting these differences dramatically reduce confusion when dealing with the opposite sex. When you remember that men are from Mars and women are from Venus, everything can be explained."

I have been trying for so long to figure men out. why they do certain things they do, how they feel about certain things we( women) do. This book gave me a little insight and i could completely empathize with the context of its content.

There are times when i would do things for my man and hope that he sees that the reason i'm doing them is because i care.
I expect some sort of acknowledgment of the efforts i'm making to keep him happy..when he doesnt reciprocate, i relentlessly keep up. hoping that one day, he'll see all the things i do for him. It gets to a point where i begin to feel unapreciated and frustrated. i can suddenly not take it anymore and my pent up antipation becomes aggresion, im thinking "he just doesnt care about me".

You see, maybe he does care, he just may be oblivious to the things the woman wants & or needs. This leads the woman to think that the man is excedingly selfish when all along SHE was doing these things for him hoping to ellicit some sort of return.....he did not ask her to do them. The man thinks that the woman has suddenly changed & become a bitch cuz she now no longer does these things with a smile, if at all. The woman gets fed up doing things for a man that does not appreciate her.

i think it all boils down to the fact that perhaps I am not speaking a language which he can understand, nor is he speaking mine. This is not to say our miscommunication is one or another's fault, we just need to try to figure out each other's language.

Sometimes, we all forget just how different we are. We expect him know exactly how we feel and he us..... This "magic" between 'us' is something i dont know if i'll ever be able to comprehend..

i might not be back soon cos i've got a lot of things on my to-do list but i hope this post has been insightful to some of you.. Be sure to share your thoughts on what you think..

Later luvs...Kisses!!!!
F.

Its been a while...

2009-02-11T08:54:00.000-08:00

My countiry pipo!! How una dey? i dey girit oh!! lol...i'm at the computer Lab in skul and i have a very huge textbook in front of me because i'm supposed to be studying for a test right now but i have'nt blogged in so long and i couldnt help myself..i just opened my homework in another window jo!!

It's been what..three weeks?? Anyway, i've missed blogging and all the wonderful bloggers in blogsville.. For the past hour,i've been going from blog to blog just trying to catch up on what i've missed.

You see, i already started this post a week ago but for some reason, i wasnt able to complete it so i saved it as a draft.

I was gonna talk about how Feb 14 was going to be like for me,but Valentine has come and gone already.just like that.. to some of you, it was probably a wonderfully romantic day but to some of us who are currently single, it was just another saturday. I did my laundry, cooked, and after that,i read a good romance novel. There!! i've said it. Dont lie, some of you had a worse day. lol

On sunday, the day after valentine, i went to church with my Uncle and through out the service, the pastor just kept preaching about love and marriage. Infact, he started giving us gist of what he and his "beauriful" wife did on Valentine's day.. Me i was just like, Hmmm Na wa for this man oh, make we hear word jo. You and your honey did this. You and your sweerat did that. So the rest of us who didnt have anyone to spend the day with should go and jump in river niger abi. Hiss..
Father please forgive me for hissing at a man of God.

Anyway, that wasnt even the worst part. When i got home, Uncle E called me and said he wanted to talk to me. Wondering what it could possibly be about, i sat down on the couch next to him.

"Fashingaa are you okay?" he asked

"Yes i am..why?"

"It's just that you've been moody since yesterday. is there any problem? you know you can talk to me"

At this point, i was like moody ke. This dude was obviously getting wrong signals. " There's no problem. I'm fine"

"if you insist you're fine then ok."

I sat there for another two minutes waiting for him to continue with what he wanted to talk to me about but when he wasnt saying anything else, i realized that he was done. He stands up, goes into his room and emerges a few minutes later all dressed up.

"Are you going out?" i asked

" Go get dressed. we're going out." Awoo..just like that?? whats up with this dude.

"Where are we going to?"

"Consider this a date. i'm taking you out. I noticed you didnt go anywhere yesterday. so i figured we could just go somewhere and chill"

Chei!!!!!!!! i don suffer..My Uncle was feeling sorry for me..Oh my God! i have suffered indeed. lol

Meanwhile, my friend came to visit last night, telling me that he'd had a serious accident and his car was in really bad shape. He narrated the story of how the other car which was much bigger than his, had hit him from behind with such a force that almost toppled his car over.
I was so thankful that he wasnt injured and nothing had happened to him.. But my dear friend wasnt even thinking about that. The dude, on the contrary, was elated.

"My dear, you dont know how happy i am. Right now, im seeing a doctor and a therapist"

Me i was just staring at him with my mouth open wide. This bobo can't be serious o. He had been wanting to change his car for sometime now and this was the perfect oppurtunity for him to do that without spending a dime of his hard earned money.

Yeepa!! how can somebody be this happy after surviving an accident like that? Only in Yankee i say. Instead of my guy to go to church and thank Baba God that he escaped the car crash without a scratch on his body, the Bobo was calculating how much his insurance company was going to pay him. He was even claiming a chronic back and waist pain that he didnt even have..Wonders shall never end.

His reply? "My dear, the economy is bad. You have to be wise, to survive"

Are you kidding me? point taken. My next move? I plan to slip and fall when coming out the elevator of my college and sue them for all they're worth. Lets just hope, i dont actually break my neck in the process.

I missed you guys menn!!!!!!!!! see you soon..

Later luvs..kisses!!!

Who's there?? Somebody? Anybody...

2009-01-24T08:20:00.000-08:00

"...our patchwork heritage is a strength, not a weakness...We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus, and nonbelievers. We are shaped by every language and culture, drawn from every end of this Earth. And because we have tasted the bitter swill of civil war and segregation and emerged from that dark chapter stronger and more united, we cannot help but believe that the old hatreds shall someday pass; that the lines of tribe shall soon dissolve; that as the world grows smaller, our common humanity shall reveal itself; and that America must play its role in ushering in a new era of peace."
President Barack Obama (b. 4 august 1961)
excerpt from inaugural address 20 january 2009

My heartfelt congratulations to President elect..I mean President Barrack Hussein Obama..I pray that God gives him all the wisdom and strength he needs to be a great leader..
Didn't you all just love the way Obama danced with his wife at the inaugural ball...awwww *dreamy look*..lol!! They looked like teenagers at the prom..Im a sucker for romance and watching them cuddle and whisper in each other's ears, brought tears to my eyes..

Yesterday, i got a phone call from my Immediate younger sister in Nigeria and after talking to her, i felt so homesick...for a while now, i've been suffering from a bad case of nostalgia.. and speaking to my sister, really aggravated the situation..

Right now, i'm reminiscing on the good old days i had in Nigeria...from childhood, to adulthood

I remember as a child, when my aunt would come over to our house and tell us folk stories under the moonlight until the stings of mosquitoes bites would chase us back into the house

I remember sitting in the living room with my family watching a Nigerian movie and the light would suddenly go off.an exasperated chorus of "NEPA" would often ensue

I grew up in a big family and my childhood years were the best years of my life!!

I remember as a teenager, when i would sneak out of the house in the evening to hang out with "my first love", while my immediate younger sister would be on the look out for me,always there to whisper.. "Fashingaa,Mummy is coming"

I remember as a young woman, when i made my way out of the registration hall in UNILAG..calling my Mum and saying excitedly "Mummy, i made it..i'm now officially an Akokite!!"

Most of all, i remember the good times, with my friends and family..The day i met "MR B" and knew instantly that he was the one..

I remember the annoying and reckless 'okada' drivers, The deafening honks of trailers on an incredibly hot Nigerian afternoon, The sound of hawkers selling all kinds of stuff on the highway,all in a bid to surive..

I remember the 'Aristos' in school who always talked about their escapades with their 'sugar daddies' and oppressed us with their clothes that had been bought from "abroad" lol

How can i ever forget the 'Molue' drivers and the 'iya basiras' or the Police officers who never failed to flash their torch lights and hail "Shun Sir!!" as soon as 'greens' had exchanged hands..

My country,my pride!! No matter how far i go or how high i soar, home is where i belong!!

Agege Bread!!

Iya micheal roasting 'Bole'..lol

Mama put!!

Gala!!

mmhhh...fresh suya..

Mr Olopa..lol

Well, all those pictures of suya and bole has got my stomach churning for some food, so i'm off to make myself some pancake's.:)..Before i go, check out this picture

The original 'Sasha Fierce'..Her style is unprecedented!!

Later luvs..Kisses!!!

Getting back in my element

2009-01-19T21:37:00.000-08:00

Tears welled up in my eyes and despite the efforts i made to keep them constricted, i felt my face flush as they trickled down my cheeks. Why on earth was i crying? I had no idea.
I had been running away from this vast jumbled up world that is my mind for what seems like forever.. I didn't want to cry..Damn it!! But the slow and bluesy melody of an R'n'b song on my mp3 player, brought a torrent of emotions flooding through me and before long, i was shaking like i was having a seizure. After sometime, i tried to calm down and make some sense of my emotions.

You see, i was very unhappy..Had been, for a while but I'd been hiding behind a facade. Yes!! lying even to myself that everything was fine.

The problem was, my unhappiness was unfanthomed and No it wasn't heartbreak or depression...More like a horrible feeling of despair. Without even realizing it, i had slowly been slipping into a state of paranoia..The real me, was now lost in a pile of self-pity.

Since i was a child, I've always been a go-getter, an achiever with big dreams and a fierce spirit. Now, its almost as if I've lost my purpose and drive..As much as I'd like to say that there's nothing unorthodox about my feelings, i know I'm deriding myself and i choose not to believe in a delusion..

Have you ever felt like you were in a box that just kept closing in on you?..well, that's pretty much an explanation of how i feel
A myriad of thoughts are coming to me now. I suddenly understand the epiphany of the phrase

getting back in my element

.

I'm tired of being alive and not living
I'm tired of passing through each day like a dream..
A new day is dawn for me.It's time for me to wake up and evolve

I need to snap out of my reverie.. I'M GETTING BACK IN MY ELEMENT!!!

HO HO HO!!!!!!

2008-12-25T00:35:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas y'all...It's 3 in the morning and i just cant get my eyes to stay shut... I just got off the phone with my friend after singing a christmas carol for her in my nightingale voice (yeah right!! lol)
I'm so happy that God has given me the opportunity to be here today..
I just want to wish everyone a blessed christmas and a bountiful new year

JINGLE BELLS

Dashing through the snow, in a one-horse open sleigh,
Over the fields we go, laughing all the way.
Bells on bob-tails ring, making spirits bright,
What fun it is to ride and sing a sleighing song tonight.

Chorus
Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way!
O what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh.
Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way!
O what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh.

A day or two ago, I thought I'd take a ride
And soon Miss Fanny Bright, was seated by my side;
The horse was lean and lank, misfortune seemed his lot;
He got into a drifted bank and we got upsot

(Chorus)

A day or two ago, the story I must tell
I went out on the snow, and on my back I fell;
A gent was riding by, in a one-horse open sleigh
He laughed as there I sprawling lie but quickly drove away

(Chorus)

Now the ground is white, go it while you're young
Take the girls tonight, and sing this sleighing song;
Just get a bob-tailed bay, two-forty as his speed
Hitch him to an open sleigh and crack! you'll take the lead

(Chorus)

JOY TO THE WORLD

Joy to the world! the Lord is come;
Let earth receive her King;
Let every heart prepare Him room,
and heaven and nature sing,
and heaven and nature sing,
and heaven, and heaven and nature sing.

Joy to the earth! the Savior reigns;
Let men their songs employ;
while fields and floods,
rocks, hills and plains
Repeat the sounding joy,
Repeat the sounding joy,
Repeat, repeat the sounding joy.

No more let sins and sorrows grow,
nor thorns infest the ground;
He comes to make His blessing flow
far as the curse is found,
far as the curse is found,
far as, far as the curse is found.

He rules the world with truth and grace,
and makes the nations prove
the glories of His righteousness,
and wonders of His love,
and wonders of His love,
and wonders, wonders of His love.

Now i can sleep i peace (i hope!!) and like Tu face will say, "one luv my people"..Kisses!!!!!

Funny Celeb pics--Marriage Lecture

2008-12-24T09:54:00.000-08:00

Hey peeps!! What's gud y'all!!!!...so today, im in very high spirits and practically everything has been cracking me up all day..I guess the perfect vocabulary with which to describe my mood is....hmmmm.....whats the word???.."bubbly"..lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I came across these pics and i have been laughing my ass off ever since

CELEBRITIES I WOULD LOVE TO SEE FAT: These celebs are always in such good shape. It's kinda refreshing to see what they would have looked like if they were fat..lol!!!

Julia Roberts

Jennifer Lopez

Jennifer Love-Hewitt

Gweneth Paltrow

Elizabeth Hurley

Just when you'd thought you'd seen enough, check out these ones below..They totally cracked me up..

A BAD CASE OF ANOREXIA

Marylin Monroe

Jessica Alba

Beyonce Knowles

Angelina Jolie

Lindsay Lohan

Jennifer Lopez

Paris Hilton

Bruce Lee

He doesnt look too different to me..He always was skinny..lmao

Jessica Alba again..

Angelina Jolie again...(lol!!)

Enjoy these marriage 'philosophies'
Marriage lecture 101

Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence--a life sentence.

Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached.

Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore, marriage is an institution for the blind.

Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor's Degree and the woman gets her Masters.

Marriage is a thing which puts a ring on a woman's finger and two under the man's eyes.

Marriage certificate is just another word for a work permit.

Marriage is not just a having a wife, but also worries inherited forever.

Marriage requires a man to prepare 4 types of "rings":
* The Engagement Ring
* The Wedding Ring
* The Suffe-Ring
* The Endu-Ring

So before you get married, think very hard!! or don't you agree with the lecture?? lol!!!

More truths about the institution called Marriage:

Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock.

They say when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is love; after marriage, it is self-defense.

A husband is what's left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted. -- Helen Rowland

Love: An obsessive delusion that is cured by marriage.

Abi you no gree?? lol!!
Well im gonna take a bow now...hope y'all had fun cos i know i did..Later luvs..Kisses!!!

Celebrity focus!!-- One more day to go

2008-12-23T11:55:00.000-08:00

One more day to go and its Christmas.. We keep drawing nearer and nearer to the new year.. A few weeks ago, i was going through so much in my life and i was so downcast and depressed but all that has changed now because i realize that nobody and nothing is worth robbing me of my joy. The truth of the matter is that life is complex and it cant always be rosy and smooth.. Challenges are bound to come, difficult times and highly depressing moments.. but the most important thing is how well you can handle those moments..will you give in, or be strong?? This question is very important because, whatever you do after that will either make or break you.
Right now, i feel so refreshed and ready to take on the world!!! i'm singing to the lyrics of Genevieve's song "No more crying oooo, no more tears ooo, ive got my freedom, power and more" LOL!!
Well today i'm going to talk about a very spectacular person who i consider to be an inspiration to women...at least i know she's been an inspiration to me.. She's what i like to call my "Celeb focus" of the week..

TY BELLO
To some, she known as one of the three members of the former gospel group KUSH that ruled the airwaves with their amazing song 'lets live together'. To others, she's known as the incredible photographer who captures the world with the click of her camera. To me, she's a great source of inspiration. I love to see women do outstanding things because it motivates me. In a profession that is greatly dominated by men, TY Bello continues to stand out.
She's a very creative photographer..she captures the simple things of life and makes them beautiful.

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Ty Bello is also a very talented musician and the songs in her album are a delight to the ears... hear her “Art is about collecting experiences and expressing them. For me music and photography are similar art forms. I collect experiences, stir them in myself and express it in my own language. Just like my photography, music is my language.”
Ty is a multi-talented woman, she stages an annual photography exhibition to raise funds for orphans across the country. She is also a Director of Link-a-child; an NGO dedicated to propagating information on orphanages in Nigeria.

In anything you do, try to be an inspiration and a role model to people.. That's my message for y'all today..
Now im gonna take my bow as usual...Later luvs...Kisses.. Muaah!!!!

Hey!!!! The Amazing Robert peters!!

2008-11-21T17:18:00.000-08:00

Hey people!!! how are y'all doing?? i know...i know...I haven't blogged for soo long... Same old story, I've bin busy. Anyway, today i"m gonna talk about a very wonderful person and i"m sure lovers of Nigerian home videos know him..He goes by the name of Robert peters!! Remember him?? A tall, dark, and handsome hunk, who used to thrill ladies with his rich baritone.. Well, he's been away from the movie scene for some years now. He currently resides in America and he's into film making and documentary...A very interesting guy i must say, and a brilliant mix of dexterity, articulation and intellect.. Robert was and still remains one of my favorite actors and one of the warmest people i have ever known. This post is specially dedicated to Robert peters.. You are an amazing person, someone i would not regret knowing...

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Well that's all for today folks....i promise that i'll try to be more consistent in my blogging... but don't forget i said "try"... don't take my word for it,,Lol!!
I guess its time for me to take a bow!! see ya later.. Bye luvs

I'm Back!!--Older women, younger guys

2008-10-23T05:57:00.000-07:00

Hey peeps!! what's gwannnin???..i know i have'nt blogged in about one month now but please bear with me..I was thinking about something today which i decided to blog about...It's something we are all familiar with but i want to know how y'all view an older woman-younger man relationship...As for me,i have nothing against it but it's just that i cant imagine myself dating a man younger than me,not to talk about getting married to him..The fact is its been happening and the trend is becoming even more poplular as time passes..So lets interract...what's your take on this? Is it proper for a woman to date a younger guy? and how much older than him is she allowed to be??
i need answers people!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol....Below i compiled an older woman-younger guy list of famous couples..

Mariah carey and nick cannon

Janet jackson and jermain dupri

Peter okoye and lola omotayo

whitney houston and bobby brown

usher raymond and Tameika

Even
ciara and bow-wow

chris brown and rihanna

Finally, let me leave y'all with this photo... A one time American idol winner Carrie underwood poses with her waxed figure at Madame Taussauds

Isnt it amazing, these waxed figures are looking realer each day...i couldnt tell who the real person was at first glance....
Well luvs, its time for me to take a bow as usual but ill see y'all soon.....Dont miss me too much ok....muahhhhhhh!!!!!