Socially Arkward

Snippet of my book: The Preacher's Daughter.

2014-02-06T11:00:00.000-05:00

I've decided to give you, my beautiful readers, a peek at what I've been working on for the past two months. Not only have I been blogging, I've been writing my 1st novel. Since you guys have been beyond amazing and extremely supportive (this blog has gotten over 1,000 views just last month alone) I want you to be the first to read my book, The Preacher's Daughter.

Please look out and spread the word about my new book. Also look out for special giveaways and discounted prices in the Summer.

Now without further adieu, The Preacher's Daughter.

Chapter 1

“May the Lord be with you,” my father said to crowd of no more than 50 people. 54 if you count my mother, my two brothers and me. This was a good Sunday morning turn out compared to the usual 12 faithful churchgoers who haven’t given up on my father, Pastor Donald E. Carlisle. Our church, Bible Baptist Church, had over 600 members 8 years ago, before Deaconess Michelle Johnson filed a lawsuit against my father. Deaconess Johnson was known to flirt and hit on every man, married or not, who would give her the time of day. She wore these tight little pants suits that left nothing to the imagination, squeezing her 5’ 6” 180 pound frame. She always wore her hair up in a bun with one long curl hanging in front of her plump face. When in deep conversation with the opposite sex she would twirl that one curl around her finger so tight that over the years her hair started to recede.

Deaconess Johnson was the president of the trustee board and often spent a lot of time alone with my father going over the church budget and deposit slips. Rumors started to spread about the pastor and deaconess Johnson having a secret affair. They both denied everything. I mean after all why would the pastor, a holy man of God, cheat on the First Lady? That’s what we all thought until one night after revival Mrs. Johnson claimed my father touched her in the finance room and offered her money to sleep with him. Of course there was no truth to that or so my father says but there was no convincing the rest of the congregation. My mother, Patricia Carlisle was devastated but stood by her man. Divorce was not an option, that’s what the bible said. With half the congregation gone we had no choice but to downsize.

With all of the drama behind us, my father decided to move forward with his ministry and purchased a small little black and white church off Dyre Avenue in the Bronx that needed a lot of work. The Lord told him that we needed to get out of Queens and start ministering to the people of the Bronx. I doubt the Lord said all of that but we went along with his master plan and relocated. To say I hated it would be an understatement. The dim lighting and dingy stain glass windows in this new church creeped me out. This church didn’t have pews like our last one, just those hard metal folding chairs that gave you frost bite when you sit on them for too long in the winter. The air conditioner didn’t work and the repair man had to come three times to fix the leaky boiler. I remember my poor mother spending hours scrubbing the windows and repainting and oiling those chairs but come Sunday morning the chairs still squeaked and the “white” dove with the olive branch depicted on the windows still looked like a pigeon with a Slim Jim in its mouth.

“And also with you,” the congregation replied as they quickly scurried out of there trying to avoid being trapped into going to service number three which was starting in thirty minutes. Yes that’s right, my father has three services on Sunday and I’m forced to sit through all three. Even when there’s only eight people in church, again four of which being my mother, my siblings and myself, he still would hold service. To keep myself awake I pretended to go to the bathroom and then quietly snuck off into my father’s office to check my MySpace messages. Just like the rest of the church, his office was dimly lit and smelled like he sprayed the walls with eight bottles of cologne. Holding my nose I ran over to his computer and hit the power button. With all the virus Spyware ads, pass code log on prompts and daily scriptures that popped up on the screen it seemed like it took a whole ten minutes for his Dell laptop to finally come to the home screen. I knew I had to move fast before my mother came looking for me. I quickly typed in my MySpace user and password and impatiently waited as my profile uploaded. Five minutes later my message icon flashed and sure enough Michael Coleman, or Mike as his friends called him, had responded to my message. I’ve had a crush on this boy since the third grade, Mrs. Child’s class in P.S. 41, and now almost seven years later I’ve finally got the guts to tell him, well sort of.

We were both in Ms. Smith’s homeroom class at Evander Childs High School. The first day of class he walked in wearing a black and blue Rocawear hoodie shirt with Ecko jeans, a pair of black and blue Air Jordan’s sneakers and a diamond earring in his left ear. All eyes were on him and they should be. I mean who could resist those hazel eyes, curly hair and perfectly straight teeth thanks to the braces he wore in the 6th thru 8th grade. Every girl in the room quickly moved their book bags off the seats next to them they were reserving for their best friends to make room for him. My heart stopped for a minute as he came right over and sat next to me. Considering the fact I was the only one he knew in that class I shouldn’t have been surprised. From all the eye rolling, teeth sucking and gasps heard around the room, everyone else was surprised.

“What’s up Jess, how was your summer?” he said smiling, flashing me those pearly whites. I swear my insides got all warm and tingly just at the thought of him being so close to me.

“It was cool; I worked at my dad’s church.” I said exaggerating the truth a little. I didn’t really work there; I was forced to go and sure as hell didn’t get paid for it either.

“Oh that’s right, church girl working in a church. It suits you.” He laughed “So how many Hail Mary’s did you do?”

He stopped laughing when he realized I didn’t join in with him. “Calm down I’m just joking. Look my uncles a pastor so I know what it feels like to spend every day in church.”

That actually made me smile a little, knowing that someone as popular as Mike was also into church. It was weird to me because I also attended church but was never a part of the “cool” crowd. As strange as it may sound, my parents forbid it. They would always say “Jesus wasn’t popular. He did his own thing and people came to him. Live holy and people will flock to you.” That may have been true during the biblical times but now in 2005 it didn’t work out so much for me. The kids usually tease me calling me “Church Girl” and “Holy Roller” and made fun of how I dressed. Everyday my mother would make me wear these hideous skirts that stopped mid-calf, a button up or high collar shirt that didn’t have a designer label stitched on it and my hair pulled back in a ponytail. I also wore my mother’s old wide framed glasses that didn’t really help gain me any cool points, just more jokes at my expense.

When I entered high school I begged my parents for contacts or at least some name brand glasses but being the high and mighty Christians they were, they denied my request. “Jesus didn’t wear contact” they would say. He didn’t wear glasses either I thought to myself but dare not say out loud or else my mother’s backhand would come flying across my face. My mother was known to discipline her children in public. I remember when I was eight years old the choir director finally gave me my first lead song. I was soo excited that I stayed up the night before my big performance practicing my solo in the basement. To say I was tired the next morning would be an understatement. I tried my best to keep my eyes open during service but the Sandman got the best of me and I fell asleep right before the choir got up to sing. Waking up just in time, I walked over to the microphone and accidentally yawned loudly as the organist started to play His Eye is on the Sparrow. Right after our musical selection, my mother signaled for me to come down from the pulpit. I thought she was going to tell me how good I did or even give me a hug. As soon as I got next to her she patted the pew, motioning for me to sit down. Out of nowhere she plucked me right in my mouth. I swear the whole church must’ve heard it. A few people mumbled and some even praised her saying “That’s what she gets for sleeping in church.” Now fast forwarding, my parents still believed in “Spare the Rod, Spoil the Child.” At the age of 16 back talking them would still get you smacked.

As the school year went on Mike and myself got closer, but not the closeness I hoped. During lunch and in the halls between classes he would give me a quick wink or the infamous one handed hug, you know, the same hug you give the old deaconess that smells like Ben gay cream and pocket mints. I would always blush and feel special during our brief encounters until I look over his shoulder and notice one of the cheerleaders or whichever girl was in rotation at that time waiting in the stairwell for him. Although we had each other’s numbers Mark never called me and I never called him. I’ve picked up the phone many times and dialed the first couple digits of his number then fear took over and I hung up.

One night I searched his name on MySpace after hearing him talking to Carl in homeroom about it and sent him a friend request. That was a Friday night. I waited all weekend and still no acceptance from him. My nerves got the best of me so Monday morning before school I logged on with the intentions of deleting my request and there it was: Michael M-Dog Coleman has accepted your request. From that moment on I was hooked. Every day after school I would run to the family room before my parents got home from work, log on to my page and “cyber stalk” Mike. It became an obsession, I couldn’t control myself. I wanted to see who he hung out with, who he was dating, how he spent his weekends and anything else I could dig up on him. The night before Valentine’s Day I followed my usual routine: dinner, shower, meet in my parent’s room for our nightly prayers then detour past my bedroom and head downstairs to the family room to stalk Mike’s page. I was dying to see who would be his valentine. My heart dropped when I logged on and saw he had another woman as his profile picture. Tears began to flood my eyes; an uncontrollable stream burned my face as I jump up from the computer and screamed to the top of my lungs “Mommy! Mommy!”

I knew the woman in the picture very well; she was a member at my father’s church in Queens, Mrs. Coleman. My mother, followed by my father and brothers Anthony and James came stumbling down the stairs. “What’s the matter Jess? And why are you still up, its way past your bedtime?”

“Look” I said barely above a whisper as I pointed to the computer screen.

My parents read what I was too scared to say out loud “RIP mommy, you fought a good fight. God gained another angel tonight. Keep my spot in heaven warm for me. Love always your son, Mark.” My mother’s began to blink more than normal, fighting back tears. After a long moment of silence my father finally spoke

“Mrs. Coleman fought cervical cancer for many many years. I hate to see her go but I’m relieved that she’s with the Father now, pain free. We’re going to the hospital, Jess keep an eye on your brothers.” I nodded my head, logged off and as soon as I heard the car pull out the driveway I ran to my room and cried myself to sleep. Yes I was hurt by the sudden news of Mrs. Coleman’s death but I was more hurt that my Mark was in so much pain. Mark didn’t come to school for the rest of the week. After the funeral he stayed home for another week. I volunteered to bring his homework to him so he wouldn’t fall behind and often sent him inspirational messages through MySpace. Even after he returned to class I continued sending him messages and helped him with class assignments, anything to get closer to him. A couple weeks later I was following my usual nightly routine, checking MySpace but this time when I logged on I damn near choked on the gum I was chewing, I had a message from Mark! After all this time he actually wrote me back:

Jessica I just wanted to let you know that I’ve received and read every message you’ve sent me. They’ve been a big help with deal with my mother’s death. Sometimes when I start doubting God I just read your messages and the pain in my heart lightens up a little. I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. Thanks for being a great friend! If there's anything you ever need don’t hesitate to ask.

- Mark

And that was the start of our cyber fling. Mark would message me sweet little Good Morning / Good Night messages but in school he wouldn’t pay me any attention. I started saving up my allowance and brought a tight pair of jeans and a low cut shirt that showed my 34 C cup cleavage. I stuck them in my book bag and changed my clothes in the bushes around the corner from the school. Determined to get Mark’s attention in person I strutted past him in homeroom, chest out and head held high but all I got from him was “Nice shirt!”After two weeks of changing my clothes Mark still seemed uninterested although it did get the attention of a few boys here and there. The school year was coming to an end and I was desperate to get Mark’s attention. I just wanted him to say everything that he messages me on MySpace in person. I want him to proclaim his love to me. I want to make every girl that’s ever called me “Church girl, gospel geek or Jesus junkie” envious and die with jealousy every time they see me and Mark walking down the hall holding hands together. I want him to be my first. After sitting up all night dreaming about how my first time with Mark would be I couldn’t take it anymore. I tip toed past my parent’s room, down into the family room and logged on my MySpace page. I clicked on Mark’s page and my hands suddenly got all sweaty. Come on Jess it’s now or never. He might be feeling the same way and is just too scared to say it. I took a deep breath and without thinking just let my fingers do the typing.

My father’s laptop seemed to be moving at the speed of dust. I felt a panic attack coming on as I waited for Mark’s reply to upload on the tiny screen. What if he turns me down? What if I just ruined our friendship? Just then I heard someone walk past the office door. I quickly closed the computer and saw my 10 year old pain in the ass brother, James running toward me.

“Oooooooowwwwww, I’m gonna tell dad your playing on his computer!”

“I’m not playing on his computer, I’m…..umm…. making up the schedule for next week’s bible seminar.” I said knowing he didn’t believe me, hell I didn’t even believe myself.

“Well hurry up! It’s not fair, you get to hide in here and miss service while me and Ant are out there bored to death.”

“Yea, yea, yea now get out!” As he turns to walk away I quickly opened the computer. Damn! This dumb computer went on sleep mode!

“Oh yea, mommy’s looking for you” James shouts from in the hallway. Great, she’ll probably come back looking for me in the next five minutes. I have to move quick. The computer finally decided to awake from its beauty sleep. I clicked on my new messages and held my breath as I read Mark’s reply:

Umm, wow! I really don’t know what to say. I love you Jess just never knew how to say it, especially now without sounding too vulnerable. But are you sure this is what you want? I’m not shooting you down, just making sure you know what you’re getting into. You only get one chance to be a virgin and if you want me to be the one you share your first time with then ok.

I love you J,

- Mark

The biggest grin crept across my face. I was on freakin’ cloud nine. I felt like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. All my insecurities went out the window. I felt beautiful. I was beautiful and more importantly I was in love and Mark was too. “Get ready girls, daddy’s gonna enjoy rubbin’ on you two,” I said grabbing my breast and lightly squeezing them. I spun around quickly in my father’s chair still grinning from ear to ear when suddenly the smile vanished and I felt something knock the wind right out of my chest. I hit the ground and when I looked up I saw my mother reading not only Mark’s message but the original one I sent him. My ears started to ring, my chest started closing up on me. I couldn’t breathe. The room began to spin. My eyes got heavier and heavier. Then I blacked out.

It took me a minute to figure out where I was. I definitely wasn’t in my father’s office anymore. Fear flooded my heart as I recalled the last thing I could remember: my mother sucker punching and slapping me before I hit the ground. Then I remembered why she hit me in the first place, Mark’s message. I felt along the sides of the wall for a light switch and turned it on realizing I was in my room. I caught a glimpse of my reflection in the mirror. My left eye almost swollen shut and I had a small cut on my left ear. It was Monday morning and I knew I wasn’t going to school looking like this. I laid back down on my bed and cuddled up with my pillow and cried. I went to grab tissue to wipe my eyes and I noticed a small green, white and yellow pamphlet on my night stand where my box of tissues use to be. I wiped my eyes with the sleeve of my shirt and opened the pamphlet. A note fell out that said:

Welcome to your new school, your new home, Saint Francis Academy. Your stuff is already packed, you leave on Wednesday.

Also, we deactivated your MySpace account and disconnected your phone.

-Love Mom and Dad

“FUCK!!!!!!!!!”

- Look out for The Preacher's Daughter, coming Summer 2014

Natural Decongestant

2014-01-26T12:57:00.002-05:00

Brrrrrrr! It was literally 9 degrees the other day in New York! I'm not use to this weather and definitely didn't know how to dress for this weather. Of course I had a hat, scarf and coat on but evidently that wasn't enough to battle this Arctic chill. I found myself sneezing and struggling to breathe.

I immediately went to my medicine cabinet and pulled out a few ingredients that cleared me up in no time.

This past weekend I was babysitting my nephew, whose 8 months, and of course my son, whose 4 years old. They both woke up with snot and crust stuck to their face (sorry for being soo graphic but it was nasty). I immediately went to my cabinet again and whipped up the following recipe:

Ingredients

Cloves

Thyme

Rosemary

Lavender

Lemon

Try to use essential oils because they are more concentrated and only require a little bit. If you don't have oils, regular spices, whether dried or fresh will work just fine.

Take a pot and add water. Pour in your ingredients and boil everything. After about 5 mins your house will be filled with the smell of this mixture. Your really don't have to do anything after this. The aroma helps clear your nasal passages and loosens up the mucus. Now when I say it loosens it up, it really does. My nephew had so much come out of his nose! Afterwards he was breathing just fine and so was my son.

Another natural decongestant is Apple Cider Vinegar. Take a tablespoon of this vinegar (organic is best but any kind will due) and drink it straight. Brace yourself, it doesn't taste good but gets the job done. It's not really suggested that you give small children a full dosage of vinegar although a few drops in 6 oz of water won't hurt.

And there you have it ladies and gentlemen, a cost effective way to battle congestion.

DISCLAIMER: Homemade deodorant

2014-01-25T22:09:00.003-05:00

A few people have mentioned that the deodorant recipe I listed has caused itching and redness. It is suggested that you do a test sample as many people are having allergy like reactions to baking soda. Also be mindful of your perspiration. Sweating, skin to skin friction and baking soda can irritate the skin causing inflammation.

This does not mean the deodorant doesn't work, you may just have sensitive skin.

If you happen to be one of the few people who are having a reaction you can omit the baking soda from the recipe all together or try substituting it with an ingredient that's soothing like Shea butter.

Also, Check back frequently because I will be launching an all natural product line. The deodorant line will be ready for sale sometime in February!

Thanks for reading and keep those comments, suggestions and concerns coming!

Homemade Pre-stain treatment

2014-01-24T09:44:00.001-05:00

This is a very simple yet effective way to remove stains from clothing. It can be an old stain (I'm not talking about a stain that's been on your shirt since 1999 either) or a new stain. I like this recipe because not only does it work, the ingredients can be found right in your house. Also, if your into hand washing your clothing (I hand wash my son's school clothing practically every other day smh) this treatment leaves your clothing very soft so there's no need to use fabric softeners.

WARNING: Please Please Please be very careful with this! I learned the hard way and ended up with blisters on my fingers the first couple of times (nothing too crazy but still, a blister is a blister).

Here's what you need:

Gloves (the most important thing)

White vinegar

Baking soda

1 - 2 Tbsp of your favorite laundry detergent

A small bowl (I use the laundry detergent cap)

I start by putting the clothing that needs treatment in a sink. I pour the baking soda in the cap or bowl and mix it with the laundry detergent. Keep mixing until it makes a paste. Take the cap and pour in the vinegar and mix. REMEMBER: This will have the same reaction as the "Volcano" science experiment we all did in school, so do this over the sink because it WILL overflow! I continue to mix it while its spilling over onto the clothing. I lay the clothing out and with a paint brush (ladies a make up brush will work just fine) I saturate the stain with the mixture. After everything is treated I go back to the first stain I treated and I scrub. Remember your gloves! The mixture with the scrubbing motion with irritate your skin. You should begin to see the stain fade away. Blood, wine and grass stains may take a little longer. If this is the case, I apply the mixture again (after scrubbing the stain for 1 - 2 mins) and let it sit for 5 mins. Repeat the scrubbing process and the stain should be gone.

Now if you decide to hand-wash afterwards....

Fill up a bath tub or 5 gallon bucket with hot water and add a little bit of detergent (I make my own laundry detergent too). Let you clothing soak in the water and after 5 minutes agitate the water (act like a washing machine and beat the crap out of your clothing!) Swish it, mix it, beat it, however you feel will effectively clean your clothing. Some people use a plunger (they poke holes in the suck part so it doesn't stick to the tub or bucket) to agitate the water. I just take a stick (usually a broom handle) and "stir" the water. Empty your tub or bucket, remove the clothing and refill the tub / bucket with clean water, then replace your clothing. This will rinse the clothes. You can also add a cup of white vinegar to the water as a softener. Now ring out by hand and hang to dry. Although I'm starting to become anti-dryers, a dryer will definitely speed up the drying process.

Mini rant on dryers coming in 3.......2.......1........

"OMG all this time I thought the lint in the dryer was from sock and towels when it's actually pieces of my shirts, jeans, jackets, etc!!!! No wonder some of my shirts only last about a two years tops. I thought it was the clothing companies being cheap (they probably are) but nope its my freakin' dryer eating up my clothing. Maytag and Clean Rite owe me a Sh*t load of money for all of my clothes they destroyed. Ain't no body got time to be buying clothes all willy nilly because your dryer enjoys consuming my drawers!"

OK, I'm done now lol.

As usual, please feel free to email me: Sociallyarkward@yahoo.com or comment below with updates, suggestions and recipe alterations. I'm loving the feed back I've been getting. Keep it coming guys!

xoxoxo
Chan

Homemade Deodorant Update!

2014-01-21T11:29:00.002-05:00

So as promised, here's my review on my homemade deodorant. It's been about a full week since I've used traditional deodorant, relying solely on my homemade deodorant. Instead of posting daily I decided to give you one full week review of my experience using Coco-Almond (The name I gave my deodorant). During the past week I've gotten a lot of support and even some ideas on adjusting this deodorant recipe ("Add some Vitamin E"). Then of course I got the "Girl are you crazy! What black person you know makes their own deodorant?". Either way, before you judge, read my experience and decide for yourself if this is for you.

Day 1 (January 15, 2014)

I applied my Coco-Almond deodorant and went to work at 8:30am. My office is usually hot (my desk is located right next to the heater). At around 12pm I began to feel a damp feeling under my arms (hmmm, this never happens when I use Dove). This feeling continued throughout the day. I finally decided to go to the bathroom, got some paper towel and lightly patted my pits dry. Surprisingly the deodorant was still visible and I didn't stink. Clearly Coco-Almond isn't an antiperspirant (not necessarily a bad thing). Of course I did my research on antiperspirants and here is just some of my findings...

"DISADVANTAGES OF ANTIPERSPIRANTS:

As we know that antiperspirants are used for controlling sweat however, there are some side effects which we must be aware of like:

Allergic Reactions: Some of the antiperspirants have a tendency of causing skin allergies like itchiness and red skin rashes.

Lumps: Some antiperspirants block the pore of the skin and cause bacterial infections for eg. Armpits lumps.

Other side effects: There are other similar side effects as deodorants such as: Clothes stains and Breast cancer." - Thanks Google.

With all of that being said, using a deodorant that doesn't contain antiperspirants didn't seem all that bad anymore. The sweating was the only negative, now on to the positives: No staining and no odors (I did the "yawn and smell your pits" test - No funky smell). I did however reapply the deodorant at around 5:30pm which really wasn't necessary but because I was so paranoid about the sweating (which really wasn't that bad) I generously reapplied.

Day 2 (January 16, 2014)

My vacation from work starts today! Yayyyy! I didn't go anywhere so it was more like a Stay-cation. Again I woke up odor free. So to test my Coco-Almond out I did an intense top-to-bottom house cleaning. I scrubbed, mopped, swept, wiped and dusted every inch of my apartment. I even hand washed some of my clothing (using a homemade stain pre-treatment I'll share in my next blog). After all of that still no odor. Later that night I went out to a lounge with a friend (I didn't reapply). Got home at about 4am and before showering I did the smell test and no odor (although my pits were a little damp).

Day 3 (January 17, 2014)

Laid around the house most of the day then headed to the city. I took my son to see the bubble show (excellent show for kids by the way) and then out to dinner. We purposely parked a couple blocks away from the restaurant and walked. By the end of the night I was not only odor free but sweat free too (I think my body is starting to adjust to the deodorant as well as adjusting the amount of sweat I produce - not too sure how true the last part is).

Day 4 (January 18, 2014)

Laid around my house again (oh the joys of being on vacation). When I finally decided not to be a couch potato anymore I showered, shaved my pits and applied the deodorant. I almost expected to feel a burning or tingling sensation but felt nothing (BIG PLUS!). I got dressed and took my son to Laser Bounce (a place in Long Island, NY that in my opinion is better than Chuck E Cheese. Plus they let adults in the bouncy houses : - ) ). Of course I sweated up a storm chasing after my son, bouncing in the house and again chasing after my son. Although my face sweated, my pits stayed dry! Later that night I went out to a lounge (didn't reapply), came home and was still odor-free and dry. Also, no irritation, red bumps or itchy pits.

Day 5 (January 19, 2014)

Didn't really do much. Laid around then stopped by my mom's house. No odor, no sweat.

Day 6 (January 20, 2014)

Took the train downtown and saw a movie (Frozen - surprisingly I enjoyed it more than my son). The theater was cold and the train was blazing hot. In both placed I remained odor-free although I did sweat a little on the train (I had on a thick North Face jacket, scarf and hat- my whole body was sweating).

Day 7 (January 21, 2014)

Back to work : - ( Confidently applied my Coco-Almond and headed out the door excited (I'm lying) about the work week ahead.... and then I saw the snow. I'm still dry (with the exception of my face and hair that's covered in snow).

Overall Conclusion:

This is something I can see myself using on a regular basis. It's cheaper and safer than store brought deodorants and will last wayyyy longer. It smells nice, went on smooth, lasted practically all day, and didn't stain my clothing like Dove tends to do. It has the same texture as other deodorants and didn't cause any irritation even post shaving. What more can I say, I'm sold!

Please feel free to email me questions, comments or recipe adjustments: Sociallyarkward@yahoo.com

Until next time......

Journey to the land of Frugality: Homemade Deodorant

2014-01-15T13:21:00.000-05:00

Journey to the Land of Frugality

So in my last post I spoke about being "frugal" in an attempt to cut down on my excessive spending. I've done some research and over the next couple of days I'm going to try out different things and give you guys a daily update. In other words, consider me your frugal guinea pig! In addition to updates, I will also show you how to make all of these house hold products and toiletries with step by step instructions and photos.

I decided to start with the most disturbing frugal method: Homemade Deodorant.

As a female (correction, as a human being) its completely unacceptable to walk around smelling like you bathed in old hot dog water. I have a fear of stinking. Stinking leads to loss of friends, lowered self-esteem and possibly, job terminations (I had a co-worker fired for body odor. There was a clause in our contract that said "We must come dressed appropriately for work" and foul odor falls under not being "dressed" appropriately). With that being said, I work 5, sometimes 6 days a week. I can't afford to lose shifts or be sent home due to body odor. With hesitation, I attempted the homemade deodorant "challenge."

Here's what you will need:

1/2 cup baking soda

1/2 cup cornstarch

6 tbsp. coconut oil

1/2 cup shea butter (optional - I didn't use it)

Essential oils (optional - I used Sweet Almond Oil. It smells delicious!)

Take all of the ingredients, except the essential oils, and mix them together in a small jar. Be sure that the baking soda and corn starch is blended in really well as they tend to settle to the bottom of the jar. Once that's done, add in 4 - 5 drops of the essential oil. You can add more if you like, but be careful not to make it too oily.

Here's what mine looked like when it was all blended together:

From here you can do one of two things: 1) Put it in the freezer as is and wait for it to get hard. Then use it like the old school deodorant Tussy

2) Take an old deodorant stick and fill it with the homemade deodorant. I'm so use to the roll on deodorant feeling that I decided to fill my old Dove deodorant stick with my new "Coco-Almond Deodorant" - Nice name right??

Fill the old stick then freeze it. Woala! You done!

Since my landlord likes my building to feel like it's next to the sun, I tested my Coco-Almond deodorant over night. With the heat blazing and no windows open I was bound to sweat in my sleep.

Next Morning (9 hours later):

I'm completely dry and more importantly "I don't stink!!!!" There's a slight hint of the Coco-Almond smell on my pits (which, might I add, still smells delicious). It showered off without a problem and my pits felt nice and smooth (baby bottom pits!). So far I'm impressed. Today (January 15, 2014) I'm going to try out Coco-Almond at work. Let's see how the homemade stuff holds up in comparison to my usual Dove deodorant. I will be checking for odor (of course), stains (I'm purposely wearing a black shirt), sweating and how often (if any) I reapply.

Check back soon for an update!

Happy New Year Everyone!

2014-01-15T09:46:00.001-05:00

So it seems like I missed a few major holidays. With that said....

Happy Columbus Day

Happy Veterans Day

Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Hanukkah

Merry Christmas

and Happy Kwanzaa

I think that's all of them!

During my time away I've done some soul searching (and budget balancing). I've realized that I spend wayyyy to much money on foolishness. For example: The amount of money I spend on fast food and dining out with friends was practically $125 a week (or $500 a month)! On average I spend $50 a month in washing detergent and almost $100 a month in toiletries.

Desperate to find a way to cut down on cost I encountered this beautiful 6 letter word: FRUGAL

fru·gal

ˈfro͞ogəl/

adjective

1.

sparing or economical with regard to money or food.

It took me a while to fully grasp the concept of frugalness. Its important to understand that being frugal does not mean being cheap, its really just being resourceful.

The first step I took was setting up an account with www.mint.com. I linked all of my accounts to my mint webpage. Mint conveniently reminds you when your payments are due, when your account is approaching its spending limit and more importantly, it tracks where and how you spend your money (that's how I came to the conclusion that I was spending too much money on food).

The second step was to look at my expenses and find alternatives. Having trouble finding alternatives? Just look online. You can make practically anything! I consider myself to be a very creative person (I paint, cook, sew and crochet). Now its time to take my creativeness to the next level.

Follow my journey into the land of Frugality!

Candy Crush changed my Life!!

2013-09-04T15:25:00.000-04:00

So to the untrained eye the game Candy Crush just appears to be an innocent game, very similar to Bejeweled right? WRONG! Candy Crush, as strange as it may sound, teaches very valuable life lessons. Don't believe me? Keep reading to see how Candy Crush changed my life.

1. Every now and then it doesn't hurt to ask for a helping hand.
I'm a very independent, I'll-figure-it-out-on-my-own type of girl. So imagine my surprise when Candy Crush asked me to ask a friend for a life and to help me unlock the next level. WTF!!!! I will do no such thing! I don't want this "favor" to hang over my head. I can see it now:

Friend: "Hey Chantel can I borrow $10?"
Me: "Hell no!"
Friend: "Alright! Imma remember that the next time you need me to give you a life in Candy Crush."

See what I mean?

Well after a week of debating whether or not I was going to pay the $0.99 or ask for help, I buckled under pressure and just sent the damn request! To this day no one has thrown it in my face. Asking for help felt kinda good!

2. Competitiveness doesn't always have to be sports related.
I suck in every sport known to man! I'm short (so basketball is out), I'm not that fast (so track and any other sport that requires me to run is out) and I'm not all the coordinated (welp there goes golf). Competitiveness and Chantel have never been in the same sentence.With that being said, I didn't really care if I won or lost (unless money was involved). That all changed when I saw my great aunt (yes my mothers aunt) at a higher level on candy crush than me. "Ohhhhh hellllllll nooooo your going down old lady." And that's all it took to awaken the competitive beast inside me.

3. When obstacles get in your way eliminate them before they grow out of control
Why didn't anyone warn me that the chocolate just keeping growing and growing and GROWING! I wasted so many lives on chocolate (I sound like such a fatty saying that lol). At first I ignored them because my main goal was to focus on getting all the fruit to the bottom. I was soo focused on what I was doing that I didn't pay attention to the ever growing obstacle. I didn't really see it as an obstacle at first, I mean the name of the game is Candy Crush and chocolate is a form of candy right? No harm there! By the time I did notice the chocolate wasn't on my side, it was too late. I've learned to not have a one track mind and to pay closer attention to my surroundings. Even your enemies can come in the form "chocolate."

And last but not least...

4. ~~Patience is a virtue~~ SCREW PATIENCE!
So your hooked on Candy Crush. Every time you swear your going to stop playing once you beat that board that you've been stuck on for a week. Just when you think you figured out the magic combo to beat the level that annoying "Sorry your out of lives" message pops up and you have to wait 18 hours to have full lives again. Why should I have to wait that long? There has to be another way besides begging for lives or paying for them. And indeed there is! This little tip is for all of my impatient Candy Crushers: Just reset the time on your phone! Open the game up and Woola you have full lives again (Please, please don't thank me all at one time)! You don't have to have patience all the time. Screw patience!

And there you have it, the life lessons Candy Crush taught me!

-I'm not a player I just crush a lot!

You Got To Try This! - Cookie Bars Recipe

2013-08-29T11:48:00.005-04:00

This is one of my favorite desserts. Its very simple to make and everyone who tries it instantly falls in love with these cookie bars. After months and months of asking, my coworker finally blessed me with the recipe to this delicious dessert (God bless her heart).

Cookie Bars

Ingredients

Yellow cake mix

2 eggs

1/2 cup of oil

chocolate chips (I prefer to use vanilla chips)

Instructions

Combine all ingredients, except for the chips, into a mixing bowl and mix until its a smooth texture. Once thoroughly mixed, add in the chips and mix until they are evenly distributed. You can use as many or as little chips as you want.

Preheat your oven to 350 degrees.

Place the mixture on a cookie sheet pan and spread evenly.

(Do not butter the pan)

Bake the mixture for 16 mins (the insides should be super soft and moist)

Allow the mixture ample time to cool off (if you eat it while warm they will fall apart).

Enjoy!

From our cookie sheet to yours!

-Socially Arkward

She's suffering from Noassatall (No Ass At All)! We have the cure

2013-08-26T15:04:00.003-04:00

Some people were blessed with fame and others.... well, were blessed with an ASS.

Dear Miley Cyrus,

The next time you decided to shake what your momma failed to give you please stop and think WWJD? What Would Jenny (aka J.LO aka the Queen of big Asses) Do? Next time (God please don't let there be a next time) spare us and yourself the embarrassment!

Since we don't totally hate you we'd like to offer you a little gift:

Booty Pop! These magical underwear will make your deflated, saggy, no-having-ass self twerk to your fullest capability! Who knows, Juicy J may even give you a college scholarship now. Go ahead, enter his contest, you got my vote already.

Anyone hungry all of a sudden?

-Socially Arkward

Summer Series: Toni Braxton Free Concert

2013-08-12T09:46:00.001-04:00

Tonight Toni Braxton, singer and WE TV reality star performs all your favorite hits live, for free!

Where: Wingate Field (Brooklyn Avenue between Rutland Rd and Winthrop St. Opposite Kings County Hospital)

Time: 7:30pm

Hopefully her sister, Tamar, make a guest appearance *fingers crossed*

See you there!

With love,

Socially Arkward

Simmering Sundays: How to make "Baked Clams"

2013-08-04T10:28:00.001-04:00

Last night we received an interesting submission, a "How to make Baked Clams" recipe.

This is a first for Socially Arkward so without further ado we introduce to you Simmering Sundays, our newest weekly segment.

Baked Clams

Ingredients:

3 to 4 dozen littleneck, middleneck, or top neck clams, scrubbed

1 cup Italian-style seasoned bread crumbs

1/4 cup grated Parmesan or Pecorino Romano cheese

3 tablespoons olive oil plus more for drizzling

3 Dorot frozen garlic cubes or three garlic cloves, finely chopped

1 tablespoon finely chopped fresh parsley

Lemon wedges for serving

Cooking Instructions:

1. Line a baking sheet with heavy-duty aluminum foil. Preheat the broiler.

2. Suck the clams over a bowl to catch any clam juice, leaving clams in bottom of shells but loosening for easy eating. Discard tops of shell. Strain and reserve 1/4 cup clam juice.

3. Combine bread crumbs, cheese, 3 tablespoons olive oil, garlic, parsley and reserved 1/4 cup clam juice. Mixture will be slightly wet but not lumpy.

4. Spoon and press mixture on top of clams, covering the whole shell. Place on prepared baking sheet. Baste clams with any liquid that drips onto pan during preparation. Drizzle clams with olive oil.

5. Broil, close to heat, until clams are golden brown, 8 to 10 minutes, checking frequently after 4 minutes to make sure they're not burning and remove them from the oven as they're done.

6. Transfer to a platter and serve immediately with lemon wedges. Makes 4 to 6 servings.

And there you have it ladies and gentlemen, Baked Clams. Please feel free to leave feedback on whether or not you liked this recipe. Also keep the Simmering Sundays submissions coming!

Big shoutout to Karen J. of Edison, NJ for this recipe!

- Your favorite SQUARE

Free underwear party (Don't worry it's legal)

2013-08-01T15:59:00.001-04:00

Always dreamed about walking around in your underwear in public? Yea me too!

Well here’s your chance.

National Underwear Day is August 5^th, 2013

This is an attempt to break the Guiness World Record for the largest gathering of people in their underwear.

So if I was going to hold the World’s largest underwear “party” where would I do it?

TIMES SQUARE of course!

Come out Monday, August 5^th between 5 – 7:30pm

Times Square @ Broadway bet. 46^th and 47^thStreet

This is an 18 and over event!

(Sorry kiddies)

Acceptable attire for women:

Women must wear underpants, thongs (not too revealing; allowed on a case-by-case basis), shapewear or boyshorts (that are clearly underwear). Shirts or full coverage bras are also permitted.

Acceptable attire for men:

Men must be wearing underpants, boxers, boxer briefs or briefs. They cannot be wearing shirts, undershirts, or jock straps.

Also:

All participants can wear socks and shoes.

If it rains, ponchos are not permitted but umbrellas are.

Nudity is strictly prohibited. Although it’s not illegal to go topless in NYC, Times Square is a family-friendly location so we should all be considerate of non-NUD participants, passers-by, and tourists.

Creeps, Perverts, Overly Sensitive People, Priest, Nuns, and Recovering SAA (Sex Addicts Anonymous) group member – This might not be the event for you!

Hosted by Z100’s own GREG T

- Socially Arkward

Free weekly HIV testing & More

2013-07-31T14:39:00.001-04:00

Do you know your status?

Did you know:

More than 600,000 Americans have died from HIV since the start of this epidemic (now pandemic)

There are 1.1 million people living with HIV in the US, and 1/5 don't know they have it.

An estimate 4,000 New Yorkers will be infected this year

Every Tuesday and Thursday the Community Healthcare Network will be providing FREE HIV testing.

Along with testing they will also be doing:

Counseling, STD testing and treatment, distributing condoms, birth control pills and emergency contraceptive (Plan B) as well as doing pregnancy testing.

Every Tuesday from 1 - 9pm the mobile van can be found at:

240 Second Avenue

Every Thursday they alternate locations.

This Thursday, between the hours of 12 - 8pm, the van will be at:

149 Christopher Street

Next Thursday they will be at the Second Avenue location.

Please don't let ignorance or fear prevent you from coming out and getting tested. It's FREE of charge and completely ANONYMOUS.

HIV is color blind and doesn't discriminate against age. Anyone who is sexually active or participates in any drug related activities is encouraged to come out.

Please put the "It can't happen to me" attitude to the side, come out, get tested and be sure it hasn't "happened" to you already.

-Socially Arkward

Summer Series: Redman LIVE

2013-07-30T15:00:00.001-04:00

FREE FREE FREE FREE FREE FREE

Yes ladies and gentlemen you read correct. Tonight we have Jersey's own:

REDMAN

Performing live at:

APT. 78

4447 Broadway

New York, NY

For my younger crowd who probably aren't that familiar with this 20 year vet with several gold and platinum releases (SMH) here are a few songs you SHOULD know:

"Blow Your Mind"

"Rockafella"

"Can't Wait"

Doors open at 7pm.

Hopefully he will be doing songs from his classic Muddy Water (1996) and also from the upcoming sequel Muddy Water 2 dropping in the fall.

Please get there early, there will be free beer from 7 - 8pm (yes I said free). Now that I've got your attention, get ya ass up, and head on over to APT 78. See ya there!

Love,

- Your favorite Square

New and Improved!

2013-07-29T12:26:00.001-04:00

Soooooo..... its been an entire year! Wow....

A lot has happened, short recap: I relocated to Brooklyn, got a new car and started a new job (yayy me!). Now back to business.

During my year long hiatus I had time to reconsider what I really want to do with my life as far as writing goes. I also had time to really sit back and ask myself "why am I doing this blog?" The only thing I could come up with was: For the sheer love of writing!

There are soo many thoughts floating through my head and this is the perfect way to release them all as well as entertain you guys in the process. So with that being said........

Socially Arkward is back!

Look forward to a new and improved blog with a more personal feel to it.

Also look out for the release of the first chapter of my new book.

Thanks for reading

- Love,

your favorite SQUARE

Music MONDAY - Featuring Young Vinchi

2012-05-25T22:24:00.001-04:00

This Weeks Music MONDAYs featured artist is:

Artist:Young Vinchi

Song: Getcha Hands Up

Straight outta the BX (The Bronx, NY for my non-NY readers), Young Vinchi can be found on Twitter, Facebook, ALL over YouTube and the list goes on. His new single, Getcha Hands Up, off the "It's Me" Mixtape is hosted by 106 & Park DJ: DJ Lyve.

What more can I say about this song besides its a CERTIFIED CLUB BANGER!

It's not a hardcore, shoot-em-up, My-chick-badder-than yours song. Its more of a we-just-wanna-have-fun song. As soon as the video started I got that I-wanna-go-party vibe (its guaranteed to have you dancing, or at least tapping your feet, for the entire song and even afterwards). The video was both creative and entertaining and I loved how he repped both his borough and his label (Troublemaka) through out the entire video. He had multiple scenes, which was a breath of fresh air (compared to the average video where the camera man follows a rapper down the street, into his mommas house, to the corner store, to the train station then back to his mommas house).

Check out his single GETCHA HANDS UP below:

What really impressed me was how Young Vinchi managed to portray a party scene without having half naked women and potheads all over the dance floor - plus its profanity free (B.E.T. definitely won't be banning this video anytime soon).

Overall, I like this guy and can't wait til he comes out with a remix.

Follow him on twitter: @YoungVinchi

- From one SQUARE to another..... Enjoy

MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND... What to do in NYC

2012-05-25T21:40:00.001-04:00

So for those of us who weren't lucky enough to go to Myrtle Beach or the Hamptons, fear not, there's plenty to do in the city (NYC).

Free Today Show and Good Morning America Concert Monday May 28,2012

Featured Artist: Bobby Brown
Get there early for good seats, preferably 6am. Show starts at 7am.

Fleet Week and Memorial Day on the Intrepid

Concert, a movie premiere, ship tours, demonstrations and much more.
Come out and show your pride in America.

Governor's Island Family Festival: Saturday, May 26th

Live music, clowns, games, arts and crafts, food (need I say more)

Shop til you drop: Memorial Day Weekend at Woodbury Commons Premium Outlet

Spend a day or the whole weekend.
With stores like Armani and Jimmy Choo who would ever want to leave?

Cloisters Family Festival

Enjoy a medieval weekend at the Cloisters Museum (99 Margaret Cobin Drive, New York)
Take part in arts and crafts, go on an art hunt, tour the museum or just sit and take in the beauty of the garden. Theres tons to do here and did I mention that this was one of my FAVORITE MUSEUMS?

Bethpage Federal Credit Union Air Show: Jones Beach Saturday and Sunday 10am - 3pm

It's a bird, it's a plane... Wait a minute, it is a plane. Get your beach chairs and umbrellas (and maybe some earplugs) ready to experience the U.S. Navy Blue Angels and the Canadian Forces. Snowbirds.

Of course theres much more to do in the big city (fireworks, clubs, restaurants, etc) but why do the ordinary when you could make this a Memorial Day to remember.

Now go and have an AWESOME Memorial Day Weekend

- Social SQUARE

Movie Review: CHERNOBYL DIARIES

2012-05-25T03:01:00.001-04:00

So this is your basic adventurous group of tourist who want to explore off limited areas seeking a thrill. And naturally, we all know the outcome.... Disaster. Well if you guessed that much then you've seen this movie already. Save your money and wait for it to become a part of HBO or Showtimes list of re-run movies.

The film starts out with a group of tourist, 2 guys and 2 girls, who originally wanted to go to Moscow but ventured off to Pripyat, a city next to Chernobyl where the former workers of the Chernobyl nuclear reactor use to live, to do some extreme touring. After protest the entire group agreed that Pripyat would be a better location to do sight-seeing than the original destination. They meet up with an extreme tour guide, named Uri, who offered to take them to Pripyat. They are accompanied by two other tourist who claim to be celebrating their honeymoon. Upon arriving to the checkpoint guarded by government army officials (yes this "abandoned" city has a checkpoint) they are denied entry. The tour guide claimed that there was more than one way into Pripyat and enters through an unguarded entrance. They tour the creepy, deserted apartments, playground and schools and after almost being attacked my a giant brown bear (yes that's right I said a BEAR) they decided to leave. Apparently something doesn't want them to leave (maybe the bear) because when they returned to the van the spark plug wires were pulled out. (Kinda get where this is all going?)

Overall I was not impressed. The camera work was mediocre but I'm assuming that's the look the director was going for. The movie dragged in the beginning and half way through I was fighting to keep my eyes open. I also found it very insensitive to the families who experienced and are still suffering from the aftermath that took place at Chernobyl. Although 25 years may seem like a long time, the events that took place are still fresh in their minds. It's sad that this director chose to use mutant humans who were infected by the high radiation levels to be the "monsters" in his film. Even though the "mutants" are rarely shown (it's more of shadowy / half blurred figures) they are still the "bad guys" of the film. For anyone who is familiar with the events that took place on April 26, 1986 I advise that you DO NOT SEE THIS FILM as it will upset you that someone could make light of one of the worse nuclear power plant accidents in history.

Being that this is the same director who did Paranormal Activity, I'm a little disappointed. The sketchy, hand-held camera worked great in Paranormal Activity but not so much in this movie. It became annoying and not once did I get the "Holy crap this is a true story" or the documentary effect. The "scares," and I use the term lightly were very few leaving me wondering if this movie was miscatergorized as a horror film when it should've been a suspense / thriller. The blood and gore was very realistic (the highlight of the movie) but the acting was very "blahhh" especially toward the end.

If you didn't see the trailer for CHERNOBYL DIARIES check it out below. Once you see this there's no need to go see the movie (trust me, these are the highlights of the film).

Please don't waste your money like I did.
I mean, it's a problem when the movie goers start clapping just because the movie is over.

-My world is SQUARE, what about yours?

Music Monday - Featuring The Antagonist

2012-05-14T21:32:00.000-04:00

This weeks MUSIC MONDAYs featured artist is:

Artist: The Antagonist

Song: Still Tha A

Tony Rome, Hennessee, Ace and Arsin are the members of The Antagonist. This group straight out of Long Beach, CA can be found on Facebook, YouTube, Twitter, etc.

If your a fan of Eminem and Dr. Dre then you'll love this group. They have a familiar yet fresh sound that can only be defined as "Westcoast Grimey" (Their words not mine). They're lyrically talented and the beat will automatically have you bopping your heads.

Check out their new single Still Tha A below:

"The Opposition Has Arrived!"

Follow them on twitter: @theantagonistlbc
Check out their website: www.itstheantagonist.com

Tell me what you think NY!

- Socially SQUARE!

Music Monday - Featuring Freezy

2012-05-07T20:16:00.001-04:00

This weeks MUSIC MONDAYs artist is:

Freezy

Song:Dream Girl

You can find this hip pop artist / song writer on Facebook, Twitter, Reverbnation, YouTube and the list goes on.

So in this song Freezy chose a familiar melody: Drake's "Going in For Life" (also sampled by Alicia Keys). This automatically grabbed my attention, BUT...

At times I was a little distracted and started singing along with the background music. Almost forgot he was rapping (I know, I know, not good but the tune is soo catchy). Needless to say, the background music overpowered him.

He's not bad, just needs some more work.

Check him out below and see if you agree with me or not:

Overall, I do like him and am looking forward to hearing more from this guy.

Follow him on twitter: @freezyct

- Until next time, stay SQUARE!

You wash my back and I'll wash your back.... SOMETIMES!

2012-05-05T21:41:00.003-04:00

It's funny how some people feel the Earth revolves around them. What ever they have to say is more important that anything that comes out of anyone else's mouth. What ever plans they have are so much more important than the survival of man kind.

It's funny how money changes people. One minute your the best of friends, then all of a sudden someone comes into money and now they're balling so hard muthafuckas wanna fine them. Then because your not ballin' on their level they either look down on you or you grow apart.

It's funny how you can look out for someone and when its there turn to do you a favorite, they get amnesia (and I'm not referring to the club in the city either).

Ignorant people like this need to be replaced and QUICK! They mean no good to you and are mentally and emotionally draining. They leave you second guessing your relationship with them, wondering if it was ever genuine from the start. Trust me, you DON'T need them. The fame and fortune will expire at some point. Don't believe me? Ask MC Hammer, Bobby Brown, Vanilla Ice, the Wayans Brothers and anyone whose ever been on that TV show Unsung!

Want to know if you fit the description as an ignorant asshole? Take the quiz below:

1. You and your best friend made plans weeks ago to go hang out. The night finally comes and you forgot you made plans with your boyfriend / girlfriend. You:

a) call your friend and explain what happen, then reschedule for the following weekend knowing you have to work that weekend.
b) Ignore your friend's phone call. Then call her/ him the next day and say "Oh shit, I'm soo sorry. I didn't even realize I fell asleep."
c) reschedule with your boyfriend / girlfriend. After all, you made plans with my best friend wayyyy before the plans with your boyfriend / girlfriend.

2. Your friend calls to ask you about relationship advice. You really don't want to hear about your friend and their deadbeat boyfriend / girlfriend so you:

a) say "hello....hello....can.....stop.....bacon......mmmm.....hello" then hang up. Afterwards you text your friend and say you had bad reception.
b) you put the phone down and occasionally pick it up and say "Oh really?" "Wow." Then when your friend stops talking, you brag about a new pair of sneakers you got for $300.
c) give them advice even though you can't stand the person they're dating.

3. For your birthday your friend buys you the earrings you've wanted for the past year. For their birthday you get them:

a) a card and a shout out on Facebook (shit, he / she know I'm on a budget)
b) nothing (nobody told her to buy me those earrings)
c) The sneakers they've been hinting about all week.

4. Your friend stops by just because they're in the neighborhood and you guys haven't seen each other in weeks. You:

a) ask them "What are you doing here?" then walk back to your room uninterested in what they have to say.
b) say "You could've told me you were stopping by. You could've stopped by the store and got me some twizzlers."
c) say "Hey wassup! Let me get dressed and we can go to the mall"

5. Your car is in the shop and you need a ride to the mall, so you call your friend and say:

a) hey, you wanna come to the mall with me? Great, you can drive. I'll be ready in an hour.
b) remember that shirt you brought that didn't fit? Let's go return it and get something else. Come get me and I'll ride with you to the mall.
c) hey are you free today, I need a favor? My cars in the shop and I need a ride. Could you come get me?

If you answered A or B to any of these questions...... CONGRATULATIONS your a backstabbing, selfish asshole whose only concerned with themselves. Now go do mankind a favor, find a bridge and jump!

If you answered C to all of these questions......... inbox me your number (guys only) lol. But seriously, take pride in being the humble, caring, selfless individual you are.

And remember, WATCH YOUR BACK ...... cause nobody else is gonna do it for you!

- My world is SQUARE, what about yours?

Music Monday- Featuring Loks Amillion

2012-04-30T01:08:00.001-04:00

This weeks MUSIC MONDAYs featured artist is none other than:

Loks Amillion

Song: Turn It Up DJ

You can find this multi-talented artist / producer on iTunes, Reverbnation, YouTube, Rhapsody and the list goes on. This is his debut single especially for the ladies.

I love when an artist's stage name actually describes them (For example, what the hell is a Jeezy?). This dude has A MILLION LOKS! Ladies these aren't your typical dusty, Brillo pad, linty dreads. There the sexy, if- I- turn- around- too- quick- I'll- take your- eye- out dreads. BIG plus!

If you want to find out more about him, check out his YouTube video below. WARNING: It's kinda long. Fast forward to the last minute to hear Turn It Up DJ.

Is this the new summer jam? Ladies, tell me what you think!

- My world is SQUARE, what about yours?

Music Monday - Featuring HARDLINE

2012-04-29T23:57:00.004-04:00

This weeks MUSIC MONDAYs featured artist goes to a group out of St. Louis, MO:

HARDLINE

Song: 18 Wheeler

The music was catchy, almost sounding like it came straight from a nursery rhyme (especially with them spelling out 1 800 BLOWOUT SALE in the beginning - don't try to call, its an actual number believe me I tried it lol). Aside from that, I could definitely see myself bouncing to this in the club.

They made reference to hustling and drugs, but for the most part it was profanity free. I've never seen this combination before. I kept asking myself "Should I listen to this with kids around or not?"

One thing I liked about this group was, even though they were from St. Louis they didn't have a heavy accent = THANK GOD! Your actually able to listen to and understand what's being said (a BIG plus).

Check out their single 18 wheeler below:

Watch out NY, this might be the next radio sensation!

Follow them on Twitter @HardlineRap

-But what do I know, I'm just a SQUARE!

Music Monday - Featuring Feliciana

2012-04-23T04:35:00.004-04:00

MUSIC MONDAY'S featured artist is none other than FELICIANA

Her Single off her upcoming album "Uneek" entitled Turn Up the Radio is CRAZY and the video is even CRAZIER!

Picture a "Project X" style house party with strobe lights, smoke machine, alcohol and a dude in a tiger mask and you have a kick-ass music video for Turn Up the Radio.

Feliciana embodies her own sense of style with a mixture of punk rock meets the girl next door, that adds to her UNEEK-ness. Remember her name 'cause this won't be the last time you hear it!

CHECK OUT HER VIDEO FOR TURN UP THE RADIO BELOW:

Follower her on twitter: @felicianamusic
Official Website: www.felicianamusic.com

- But Hey, what do I know? I'm just a SQUARE!