The Wright Choice

2012-09-20T07:13:00.003-07:00

Its been a while!!! Like a LONG while. But I'M BACK!! Lets get started by catching you up on my life! Still very happily married, Lillie is a wonderful 16 month old (OMG I know!) and we are all happy as ever! Here are some updated pictures....

I will talk at cha later bloggy!

Ashley Wright

Our NICU Journey and Other Struggles

2011-08-19T07:56:00.000-07:00

This was the scariest experience of my life. I didn't know that anything was wrong with my baby. All of our ultrasounds were normal. She was even supposed to weigh normally! It seemed like our world was crashing down around us.

"Your baby should be back in your room by the end of the night." That is what everyone kept saying. Well that didn't happen. I dont understand why they even said it. It just raises your hopes to let them crash and burn. She ended up having to stay for TWO WEEKS! We even had all of our things packed and ready to put her in the carseat at one time. Then we got delayed another week. It was soul shattering.

Lets start from the begining shall we? I was diagnosed with PCOS in August of 2009. We started trying to get pregnant then. I always knew that something wasn't right with my system. I never had normal periods. Starting from age ten they were messed up.

At age thirteen my mother put me on birth control. Not that I was even sexually active. My sisters had gotten pregnant at ages 14 and 15 (on purpose) and I guess she was just scared. To this day I blame the birth control. I gained 20 lbs in the first three months. 20 POUNDS! That is insanity.

Well this kept on till I was 18 and found the love of my life. I moved from Texas to Ohio just to be with him. (See previous posts for this story). All the stress that came from the move away from all of my friends and family had gained me another 30-40 lbs. I know. I was huge. I was 231 pounds of sad young woman. But the one part of my life that I was happy with was my wonderful husband!

He was everything that I ever dreamed of. That is why we started trying as soon as I found out I had this disease. All I ever wanted to be was a mommy. It took us 12 cycles to get pregnant. Six cycles of Provera, Metformin, and Clomid. We had actually given up the month before. It seems like it always happens when you take a break. I found out on my birthday that we were pregnant. I was puking and puking and puking some more. I didn't even think that I was pregnant. I went to the hospital and found out there. I of course had to check again the next day.

So from day one I had trouble. Morning sickness galore and through the pregnancy I had high blood pressure, swelling, gestational diabetes, preterm labor, hospital visits and bed rest. She was of course a girl.

At 35 weeks she was estimated to weigh 7 lbs 3 oz. I was measuring 39 weeks. I ended up in the hospital when I was 37 weeks due to high blood pressure.

I was there for a week and it stabablized its self so I was allowed to go home. At 38 weeks I had another ultrasound and she was measuring 7 lbs 13 oz. I had no idea how it was possible for her to only gain 10 oz in three weeks, but they werent concerned. So the induction went as planned at 39 weeks. (See Just My Luck, A Photo Journey)

We went in, ended up in an emergency c section and our NICU journey began. The first problem was her blood sugar. She was so used to my sugar being high that she couldnt keep up. That problem was resolved in three days. Not without 9 different I.V.'s of course. She was bruised, literally, from head to toe. Our next obstacle was jaundice.

She was put under the lights on the second day. While still on her I.V. and feeding tube. We were only allowed to hold her while trying to get her to eat. Which she couldn't do. She could barely take 10 cc's of breast milk. They wanted her to eat 75. So after three more days of lights, (day 5 of NICU), she was done. Now our only obstacle was to get her to eat. You would think that a 10 lb baby would know how to eat but thats where you are wrong. She was eating less than most of the premies.

Day after day after long, sad day we waited for her to figure it out. The doctors kept saying one more day, one more day. They said that a light bulb would come on one day and she would just start gulping it down. On day 9 of NICU we thought she had figured it out! We had all of our bags ready to go and she was all packed up and ready to go in her car seat. But it was time to eat. She only took 20 cc's. So they wanted us to wait for the next feeding to see how she would do. 10 cc's. The next feeding they put in the feeding tube again. She wasnt coming home.

We hit our lowest point. At one point we just sat in our bonding room begging God WHY? Why did this happen to us. There are so many bad people in the world that neglect their children and hurt them. Why was he punishing us? Why was our daughter struggling? All we could do was pray. Pray that she would be ok.

The next day they ordered a head ultrasound. Even they weren't sure why it was taking her so long to figure out how to eat. The results were negative for all the tests. Nothing was wrong with her brain. Thank the Lord. So we just kept waiting, and praying.

On day 13 she figured it out. Her bottles were being drained in a matter of minutes. If she took all of her bottles in a 24 hour period we were to go home!!!

On day 14 we came home. It was the happiest day of our lives. I really couldn't believe it. But little did we know that NICU wasn't the only struggle Lillie would have.

Baby acne. For three months so far. Its still not all the way gone.

Colic. For FOUR LONG WEEKS.

Constipation.

Milk allergy.

GERD.

Ear infection.

And here we are today.

She is getting so big. All of her problems are resolved and I have never been happier. I love my little chunk!!!!!!!!!

Just My Luck (A Photo Journey)

2011-08-17T08:07:00.000-07:00

On May 5th 2011 I was admitted to the Perinatal Unit of Akron General Hospital to be induced. Josh and I were VERY excited. I had suffered through my last trimester of pregnancy with hospital admissions, accidental pitocin, and terrible pain. I thought that Lillie was going to explode thru my uterus at any point! At my last ultrasound she was measuring 7 lbs 13 oz. That was a week before my induction. I KNEW they were wrong. I could see every movement that she made. I could even see her practice breathing. We ended up going thru with the induction anyways.

An hour after I had gotten settled in my room (aprox: 6 PM) a doctor came in and told me that they wanted to try using a foley bulb to expand my cervix before they started any Pitocin. I was glad that they were going to try something besides that because we have all heard horror stories about it. So they placed it. HOLY EFF. They asked me if it hurt and I just stared at them. OF COURSE IT HURTS YOU MORON! Yikes. They told me that they would be back in 3 hours to check on me and to call if I needed anything. About two hours later my contractions kicked in. It was awful. So I asked for pain meds cause I am a pansy. The nurse came in and had me transferred to labor and delivery.

And this is where the details get a little foggy. They gave me morphine to take the edge off the pain. It worked. For a little while. Then they came in to check me. The foley had done its job and I was dilated to 3 centimeters. After I was checked they started pitocin. And my contractions got really intense.

And then I asked for my epidural. Oh boy does Pitocin suck. I was insanely happy to see the anesthesiologist. Hearing all these stories about getting an epidural had me scared to death. But I realized that if your already hurting that it really wont matter to add some more pain. It started working immeadiately after he was done. I must have had a really intense dose because I could no longer move my legs. But I was happy at least!

They of course inserted a foley and checked me again. I had progressed to a 5. (Approx: 2 AM) Somewhere around 3 am they came in and broke my water to keep things moving. (I was in and out of sleep at this time so details are sparse). Someone came back in to check me at 7 am and I hadnt seen her before, meaning that a new shift had begun. As she was checking me she felt another bag of water. I didnt know that there could be more than one. So she broke it and felt again. There was another bag of water. I was begining to feel a bit like a freak of nature. She broke it. And apparently that wasnt good enough. She called another nurse in and began to press very hard on my stomach to get all the fluid out. Then they checked me again and I was a 6. They then left the room.

Ten minutes later I got the biggest shock of my life. My doctor came in and checked me. She said that Lillie's heart rate had dropped to 30 and she felt the cord. The moron nurse had shoved so hard that the water had carried her cord out with it. Dr. Johnson looked at Josh and calmly asked him to go get help. He looked scared and she said, very panicked, "NOW!" Around twelve nurses, doctors and techs swarmed my room and rushed me into the O.R. I glanced at Josh as they were running me out and he looked petrified.

I entered the room and they asked me to move to the table. That wasnt happening. So they grabbed me up and practically threw me onto it. (Ripping out my epidural). The anesthesiologist interted more meds into my epidural, which we didnt know had come out. He asked how I felt and I told him that my back felt wet and cold. He said that was a normal sensation. The doctor pricked my stomach and asked me if I could feel it. I said YES OWWW! And I heard someone say, "We lost her heart rate." And the doctor cut me open. I screamed and thrashed as they held me down. I could feel everything. My heart rate went sky high and they put an oxygen mask on my face. The last thing I remember seeing is orange and red. I passed out.

I awoke in the middle of them stapling me shut. Passed out.

I woke up in recovery holding a baby. I looked at her. Passed out

I woke up and asked Josh about ten times how big she was. "9 lbs 13 oz, 20.5 inches long" Born at 7:50 am. Passed out.

I woke up and tried to breastfeed her. The nurse came in to check Lillies sugar. It was so low it wouldnt register on the monitor. They gave me a bottle of formula to feed her. She barely drank anything. I passed out again.

I woke up one last time and they checked her sugar, it was 30. A nurse came in, took my baby, placed her in an isolette and explained that she was going to the NICU. I was in tears.

The NICU nurse came in and took Lillie. Josh went with her. I was all alone. I fell back to sleep.

The next time I woke up they had me get out of the recovery bed and walk to my next bed. (about two feet). That hurt. Then they wheeled me into the Special Care Nursery to see Lillie.

I only got a small glance and had to go to my room. I missed her so much. I spent the next couple hours asleep. When I finally woke up Josh's parents were there and had gotten me flowers.

I finally got up the strenght to go see my baby around 3 pm. It was so hard to see her with wires everywhere and an IV in her head. I just held her and cried.

The story will be finished in my next blog. "Our NICU Journey"

Its Been A While

2011-08-16T17:11:00.000-07:00

Wow. So I finally figured out my username on here. Took long enough right? Well since my last post my life has been getting better and better!!! I have a beautiful, healthy, and FEMALE baby!!!! She is amazing to say the least.

Two Weeks Old

One Month Old

Two Months Old

Three Months Old

I will be posting my "Last Months of Pregnancy" blog and my "Labor and Delivery Story" blog will be coming soon!!!!! Check back!!!!

Lillie Cadence :)

2011-01-03T09:38:00.000-08:00

Well as you have probably heard WE ARE HAVING A GIRL!!!! I am so excited! We already have everything for the nursery picked out and we are starting on it next weekend! I can't wait to VLOG the "decorating" process and the finished product! She is gonna be here before we know it! Only 18 more weeks!!!! Here are a few sneak peeks! This is her comforter and the paint colors.

Oh and of course our new ultrasound pics :)

If you cant tell what you are looking at, the top picture is her profile. Her little head is on the right hand side. And the bottom picture is obviously her girly junk :). I will put more pics up later but "Daddy" has all the others in his "brag book". She is gonna be so spoiled! Oh and we are also getting FIFTEEN boxes of girls clothes on Friday!!!!!!!!! Sizes newborn to 3T! THANKS KELLY!!! I am so excited! I will probably VLOG about that as well lol! Here are some pics of things that we have already received! The jammies are from Kelly and the cute dress is from her Grandpa Wright! Its her dress for Christmas next year :)

Well I cant think of anything else that is going on right now so I will talk to you guys later!!!

Love and Lots 'O Pink Stuff,
Ashley and Lillie =)

Halfway There!

2010-12-23T09:20:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow, Christmas Eve, I will be 20 weeks pregnant! I can't believe how fast time is going and I can't wait to meet our precious baby. I am so proud of our little one already! I just love feeling all the kicks and flips inside my belly. We find out in FIVE DAYS if were going to have Lily Cadence or Parker Mason. I will be on the phone all day that day! And yes India I will call you first :). Followed by my mommy and sisters and Josh's family, and Casey of course! Then I will post on Facebook and I will most likely blog about it! AHHHHH! I am so excited to start working on Baby Wright's nursery! And of course to be able to call baby by his/her name! (Apparently baby is excited too! *Kick, kick*)

I really need to get my butt up and start cleaning the house before Joshie gets home so I am gonna cut this one a little short! But in the mean time you guys can check our our wedding pics!!!!!!

Oh and here is a funny little video for all the crappy gifts that everyone is about to receive for the holidays :) Remember to be safe and have a Happy Christmas!

Love and Mistletoe,

Ashley and Lily/Parker

19 Weeks Pregnancy VLOG

2010-12-21T09:19:00.000-08:00

Hey guys here is my VLOG. Don't make fun of me. Tell me if I should do this once a week or not. I swear they will get better as I keep doing them. :)

Love and Baby Kicks,

Ashley and Baby Wright :)

Everything Has Changed

2010-12-17T13:34:00.000-08:00

Today has been a very somber day. Yesterday our Calvin kitty went to a new home. :'( I was and still am very upset. Advice to any mommies to be, do not give away an animal when you are five months pregnant! I felt like I lost a part of the family.

When I woke up yesterday everything was normal. Calvin was meowing and Chloe was sleeping somewhere. As the day progressed I noticed that I hadn't seen the cats in while so I went downstairs to see what they were doing. When I saw that they were both sleeping I went back upstairs. About an hour later I heard a fight going on downstairs and I thought they were just playing so I didn't think anything about it. Then Chloe ran up the stairs followed by Calvin attacking her! I had never seen him so aggressive, so I call Josh crying and make him come home to separate them. When he got home he told me that we were going to have to give him away since he was hitting an aggressive stage because I was pregnant. I was devastated. I decided to put him up for adoption on craigslist so I could chose who he would go to.

I got over a dozen emails about him but most of them couldn't even spell correctly or wanted them for their child. I wanted him to go to someone who would take care of him and I didn't want him to be tortured by a child so I kept waiting. Eventually I got an email from someone who sounded amazing! She already had a cat just like Calvin and was looking for him a playmate! She wasn't illiterate and just wanted to give him a good home. So I called her and we arranged a time for her to come over an meet him, if everything went well she would take him home.

At around eight p.m. she came over and he instantly loved her. She loved him as well. They spent a good forty five minutes playing and she told us about her other kitty and said that we could even come visit him if we wanted. So the time came to say our goodbyes. I cried all night, dreamed about him, and cried all morning. It was so quiet this morning without him.

His new mommy (Megghan) told me that she would text me and tell me how the night went. And I woke up to a text. She said that he slept in bed with her all night and he hadn't tried to fight with her other cat. So I guess he is doing ok. She is going to keep me updated and let me know if anything happens. If he does get aggressive I asked her to bring him back to us. I would rather find him a new home so I can keep tabs on him.

I have never been attached to an animal before and it is so sad to watch one leave. I miss him dearly but it was the best decision for our family.

Love and Tears,
Ashley

As Much As I Ever Could

2010-12-16T09:18:00.000-08:00

There will never be enough words to express the sadness in my heart for mothers who lose their babies. I know that I would never get over it. Everyday I see a new post about how a child has died or a woman has miscarried and I cant help to feel as if I was losing a piece of my heart. No one deserves to go through such a horrific incident. I know that God doesn't put us through trials that we can't handle but I just do not see how it could happen to such good people. Women who try for years just to bring a biological child into their life do not deserve to have their happiness ripped away. I decided to make this post for those of you who are reading this after a loss and I hope that this poem helps you in some way.

Tiny Angels rest your wings
sit with me for awhile.
How I long to hold your hand,
And see your tender smile.
Tiny Angel, look at me,
I want this image clear....
That I will forget your precious face
Is my biggest fear.
Tiny Angel can you tell me,
Why you have gone away?
You weren't here for very long....
Why is it, you couldn't stay?
Tiny Angel shook his head,
"These things I do not know....
But I do know that you love me,
And that I love you so".

This post is in remembrance of Evie Grace Harrison.
http://threedoodles.blogspot.com/

In Love and Sorrow,
Ashley

A Vision of Hope

2010-12-15T12:53:00.000-08:00

So I know I already posted today but I wanted to share this with everyone. This woman is practically my hero! She has helped me through everything! Be prepared to bawl.

Love you guys!
Ashley

Victor Me :)

2010-12-15T07:56:00.000-08:00

Everyone always wonders about "The Story of Us" so here it is!!!!!!!

I have a beautiful friend named Dani to thank for my wonderful husband!!!!!!! (She had her second baby yesterday!!!!!! Heres a pic! She is gorgeous!)

So Dani had found a really cool music website called victorme.com. It is a site for Victory Records fans to find new music. She talked me into making an account. A couple of weeks later I had forgotten all about it until I saw Dani talking to someone. I asked her who she was talking to and she replied, "A really cute guy". Uhhhh ok lol. So I checked him out for myself and wow! I was stunned. He wasn't just cute, he was a hottie :). (First pic I saw below).

Danielle wanted me to message him. I'm not usually shy but in this case I was. I read what they were talking about and he seemed super intellectual! Which of course made me like him even more. He was cute, smart, and funny. There was only one downfall, he lived 1100 miles away from me, in Hudson, OH. So I gave up the thought of him. There was just no way that it could work out. I was in Texas and he was in Ohio, how could it? So life went on. I thought about him every now and then but that was it.

So one lonely day I logged into my account. HE HAD SENT ME A MESSAGE! I knew for sure that Dani was behind it all, but I opened it anyways. All it said was, "So I decided to message you.". Really? I was so confused. I thought he was being super cocky and I totally didn't like it. But I messaged him back anyways. We chatted for an hour and I realized that he was just trying to break the ice. Not being a jerk. So we exchanged IM's and started chatting on Yahoo! Messenger.

Months went by of chatting and flirting when we decided to start talking about dating. There were so many good things about him that I loved. He was amazing! He made me feel beautiful and no one had every been able to do that before. There was still that pesky 1100 mile difference though. The good obviously out weighed the bad and we decided to be together.

I was in love. I was tormented by the thought that there was this wonderful man in my life but I never even got to see him. So we both got webcams. That was amazing! But it still wasn't good enough. The winter, spring, and summer went by and it was almost time for me to start my first year of college. Josh and I talked about it and the night before my freshman orientation at University of North Texas we decided that I was moving to Ohio. I told my family and friends. Everyone thought I was completely crazy. I was going to move five states away with a guy that I had never even met in person.

Plans were made, planes were booked, and bags were packed. And on August 15, 2009 I met the love of my life in the DFW airport for the first time. He didn't say a word when he walked up, just kissed me. (Yes I am now crying..... damn pregnancy hormones.) I knew right away that this was actually going to work out. We left the airport and drove all across Texas saying our hellos and goodbyes to my family and friends. Three days later we were headed to Ohio. I of course cried almost all of the way there because I knew what I was leaving behind. But I also knew what I had to gain. I was about to start a life and a family of my own.

Coming to Ohio was the best decision that I have ever made. I love you babe!

Here is a little video that I made while I was still in Texas.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w5qd2w99cTk

Love and Butterflies,
Ash Bash

I Knew It Would Happen...

2010-12-14T10:59:00.000-08:00

Sooner or later India always gets me to do things I don't want to do, like make a blog for instance. But who knows, maybe someone will actually read this. =)

So if you are reading this you probably already know who I am. And for those of you who don't my name is Ashley and I am living in OH-IO, with my husband Joshua and there is currently a child inside of me. Lol. I cannot wait to find out what we are having! Everyone swears its a boy, but Josh and I think that were having a little girl. We find out for sure on December 28th! The names we have picked out are Lilly Cadence and Parker Mason. I'm sure everyone back home in Texas thinks that I am completely crazy for wanting a child so soon but I cant help it.

In October of 2009 I was told that I have poly cystic ovarian syndrome (or PCOS). Having PCOS means that I don't ovulate normally, which in turn means that it is really difficult to get pregnant. Everyone who knows me well knows that all I have ever wanted to be is a mom. So obviously this news was devastating to me and my husband. So we started actively trying to conceive. I took numerous medications and ended up in the hospital as a result of some of them. After seven months of trying I decided to take a break. The stresses of finding out seven times that we had failed was taking a toll on me. I gained a lot of weight, I was always crying, and it was putting a strain on our relationship because I was never happy.

So I stopped focusing on that and starting focusing on other things, like finding a house! We had been living in an apartment for too long. So I searched high and low for a good deal and finally came across one on none other than the wonderful craigslist.com. It was gorgeous! Newly remodeled, super awesome landlord, lots of yard and we could finally have our own washer and dryer! So we moved in three weeks later on August 20th. After moving in I felt so relieved, I had something to occupy my time besides "A Baby Story" on TLC. A couple weeks went by and I started to get sick. GREAT! I was hugging the toilet on my birthday! I just knew something was wrong so Josh drove me to the hospital. The doctor came in and did some blood tests and told me that it was probably my gallbladder and that it might have to be removed. I was so upset because in March I had already lost my appendix. So after all the blood tests were done the doctor finally came in and told me what was wrong. I WAS PREGNANT!!!!!!!!!!! You can just imagine the tears. Both Josh and I start sobbing and the doctor looked at us like we were mental. I was so overjoyed at the thought that we had finally done it, without medications, or schedules, or body temperature charts. It just happened!

Leaving the hospital I called everyone I knew and spilled the beans. Everyone was surprised and happy for us. And now four months later, here we are. About to be Christmas and planning a nursery. I couldn't be happier!

Love and Rainbows,
Ash Bash =)