There Will Be Bread

Where Are You?

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 10:21:00 +0000

Greetings to all others who grace these pages! Thank you for stopping by. If you still have a reader pointed here, this blog no longer publishes in this location, but can be found at this new link. Please subscribe to the new feed, get the new blog via email or read us by liking us on Facebook or by following me on Twitter.

If you want more, please feel free to stop by the Parish Blog of St. Edward the Confessor, a blog that I founded, edit and write for my parish.

All are also welcome to visit Pastoral Postings. This blog is my pastoral formation project as I work towards my MA in Pastoral Studies at St. Bernard's School of Theology and Ministry. It is the parish blog of my workplace, Immaculate Conception.

Thank you for reading and being a part of such great online community!

On The Move

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Tue, 06 Sep 2011 09:25:00 +0000

After 4 years on blogger.com I am moving to Wordpress. I was so busy doing so, that I forgot to tell you to come on over!

Blogger was great and I leave with some reluctance. However, I think that Wordpress is ultimately a better platform. Our parish is upgrading its overall website and it is being designed in WP, so that is one influence as I make some blog changes over there. It doesn't really matter, I am changing.

Change is good, right? It is also hard; I have not found learning a new platform easy. I got some good help from someone and I am grateful; others have offered and I have yet to avail myself, but I know that I will.

In any case, this is where I will be baking bread now...

Take Nothing For The Journey

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Sat, 20 Aug 2011 10:03:00 +0000

If there is anything that I have struggled with in life - and I struggle to this day with it - is the whole notion of taking nothing for the journey. A look at Luke 9:3 reminds us of Jesus' words:

He said to them, “Take nothing for the journey, neither walking stick, nor sack, nor food, nor money, and let no one take a second tunic.

This one is very tough for me as I am known to leave the house for the 11 mile journey to my office with big tote full of things. I mean - it is not exactly a remote outpost where I will be stranded for a few weeks.

We are called, as followers of Jesus, to be a pilgrim people and to be reminded that we are completely dependent on God for what we need. I mean - I do know that!

However, like most of what we are called to do as followers of Christ, it is much easier to talk about than to do. And in this case, I can barely talk about it!

Here we are, always on a journey and while I don't want to rush us to a liturgical season far away, we are on a journey to Gethsemane, to Golgotha... It's not like one will need a lot for those places; what one will need is to be stripped away of the things that keep us from that journey and that keep us from Christ.

This is not a treatise for me - or you - or anyone to get rid of all their stuff! Although I might be talking to myself about the material stuff as well as some other pesky layers that come between Jesus and me...

The image at the top of this post was taken almost 6 years ago, as I was climbing Huayna Picchu, the mountain next to Machu Picchu. One day I will write that story, it has yet to come out of me, but it is about a day that changed my life and a day in which a very heavy backback and my fear of heights - two things I needed to let go of - made an already extraordinary day, even more so. And not always in a good way!

That is why I read two blogs with great interest this morning, after having prayed and pondered some personal matters of journey and a lighter load.

First I read Claire's second blog, Strolling to Compostelle. Now you may be aware of her primary blog, A Seat at the Table, but this other blog is about her upcoming pilgrimage to Santiago de Compostella, or Compostelle in her native French.

I have longed to make this journey, but I don't know if I will ever do it. Claire and her husband have gone multiple times and in fact, will take a very different route for this camino, La Via de la Plata. It is hard to imagine actually making this trip, but so much of my life is unlikely in how it has worked out, that I am hopeful that one day I will go.

In any event, I read Claire's words and am reminded of what such an undertaking means... and just what one has to consider before taking the first step. This is a demanding journey. You know - like life is.

Speaking of the demands of life, the other blog that really connected for me this morning was Margaret's blog, Leave It Lay. I can actually remember with startling clarity the first time I ever read her blog. It had a physical impact upon me, I was blown back in my chair!

At the header of her blog you will find these words, "pick it up. look it over. put it down. leave it lay where Jesus flang it." Talk about take nothing for the journey! And I recall what I think was her first post - a video of Nada Te Turbe, which now resides on her sidebar.

In any case, Margaret, an Episcopal priest, and her husband Joel are about to move from Virginia to... Well, you see that is just it, they don't know where they are moving. So for Margaret, it really is about taking very little for the journey, isn't it? To that end, they are having the "biggest, baddest, best yard sale evah today," in order to do just that.

(As an aside, I recently bought some books from the biggest, baddest, best Amazon used bookseller and I highly recommend it. It is officially called Joel's Books, but let me tell you that the books that he and Margaret, "flang there" are amazing. Go have a look - religion, history and more! Pick them up, look them over and take them for at least a portion of your journey by buying some of them!)

And not unlike Claire, preparing for her pilgrimage, it is about trust and taking the one thing you need most.

Yes - that would be faith.

Striking about Margaret, at least as I "read" it via email and in reading her blog, is her ever present sense of joy. I am not using this blogpost as a way to define joy and happiness, two very different things, but bear that in mind. At least when I interact with her online, I sense the bubbling of a spring and the feel of a strong breeze that will impel me along on my journey. Which at the moment, is nothing like this.

My point, my ever-long-winded point is this - how can we take nothing for the journey? How do we "fix our eyes on the hills," even when we don't know where the hills are?

These are two very different - yet similar women - about to undertake two very different - yet similar journeys. Please keep them in your prayers and thoughts. One journey chosen and deliberate and the other... well actually, truth be told, anyone who calls their blog "Leave it Lay," is making a chosen and deliberate journey as well.

All of our journeys are chosen, even when we don't seem to be choosing them; they are quite deliberate for those of us who have made the decision to follow Christ. So whatever that means, this is a journey that is not about what and how you pack, but about the opposite.

And for a tote-bag-toting woman like me, I continue my challenge.

Prayers and blessings for Claire, Margaret and for all of those who stand at the crossroads and wonder where to go and what to take.

Theology Thursday

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Thu, 18 Aug 2011 11:55:00 +0000

A post with three important links... There has been a lot of theological sabre rattling of late; sabres of the bishops it would seem. That makes me very sad and I continue to pray for the Body of Christ.

That said, I think that these three posts are very important in presenting some thoughts on recent issues. Sometimes it is time to consider new wineskins, perhaps now being such a time? I pray for the wisdom to know.

As theology is "Fides quarens intellectum," or "faith seeking undertanding," I think that questions, probing, study and journey (we are a pilgrim people after all!) are essential to theology. And as a student of theology, I do not think I am making this up! However, there has been no shortage of conversation about recent skirmishes between bishops and theologians.

Three posts to consider...

From Catholic Moral Theology we find "Father Thomas Weinandy and the Theological Generation Gap". The author, PhD in Theology makes some interesting points about what makes today's theology very different from that of the past.

From WIT: Women In Theology, we come upon "A Curse and Affliction Upon the Church? On Vitriol and Theologians." This author is a PhD candidate in theology at Notre Dame and she unpacks some of the similarities between Fr. Weinandy's remarks in an talk given in May and recently summarized in a column by John Allen at NCR, about commentary on Dr. Elizabeth A. Johnson, CSJ and recent issues with her book, The Quest for the Living God. (In full disclosure, I have read and enjoyed this thought provoking book and it has been used in two of my classes.)

From Brother Dan Horan, OFM at his blog, Dating God, we read about "Fides Quaerens Nihilum, Weinandy's Vision of Theology." Dan, who has been teaching at Siena College is a theologian himself.(In more full disclosure, Br. Dan is coming to interview me today for a future episode of his Dating God podcast.)

Read on, think, consider, ponder, pray - and repeat. We worship a Living God, we are a pilgrim people and we must literally re-member the Body of Christ. How we do that is vast undertaking.

Yes or No? Yes and No!

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Mon, 15 Aug 2011 11:24:00 +0000

Dormition Abbey, Jerusalem, November 2004. Taken by me.

I was not going to post today but as I prayed earlier and as I got ready for work, the need to write about the Feast of the Assumption and/or yesterday's Gospel about Jesus and the Canannite woman was persistent. It was even more pressing after finding these three thought provoking posts, one from Ginny Kubitz Moyer, one from Philomena Ewing (ok two from Phil, see this one also,) and one from Claire Bangasser.

Which brings me to a question I would simply like to pose for today... Yes or No? As usual, I go for the both/and approach and come up with Yes and No!

The Canaanite woman will not take no for an answer. She went to Jesus in good faith for healing for her daughter and was not going to go away quietly. Once again we meet a woman, not even a Jew, persistently going to Jesus for help. He is even pretty clear that she is not who he came to save!

She says - no, you must help me. Even the dogs get scraps!

Today we have another Marian feast to ponder, the Dormition of the Theotokos or what we Catholics call the Solemnity of the Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary.

Mary has not said no - in fact, she has said "yes." It is Mary's yes that changed the world!

What is it for you in life - the Yes or the No?

We must exercise both? How does this work in your life? I hope you comment here; I'd love to know what you think.

Jersey Shore - The There Will Be Bread Edition

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Tue, 09 Aug 2011 10:40:00 +0000

What a fine week of vacation we had, in Ocean City, New Jersey. *sigh* We love Ocean City, for many reasons.

Ocean City has an interesting history, which you can read about here. Part of the history is that it was meant to be a Christian resort. As a result, Ocean City remains a dry town to this day. While I like wine with my bread, at church and at home, I am perfectly happy to stay in this liquor-store-free town. The net result of this is that unlike Seaside Heights, now infamous because of the MTV program, (*insert eyeroll here*) "Jersey Shore," the OC boardwalk is devoid of rowdy bars and dance clubs, tattoo parlors and other such.

Now living the life I have lived, trust me - I have enjoyed my fair share of rowdy bars and dance clubs, including ones in Seaside Heights, when I was younger. At this point in my life, I am happy for a different chapter however and OC fits the bill.

Our vacation started, as many of you already know via Facebook, with a bang. As we were sitting at the traffic light that is at the entry to the island, we were rear ended. Poor Prius has had its rear end kicked, but at least it was not by Snooki! Actually, it was a teenager who hit us - a sweet kid, completely without guile who couldn't stop saying "I'm sorry!" and "It was all my fault!" No one was hurt and cars can be fixed and our vacation proceeded without issue after that.

I had visions of writing a lot - blog posts as well as the kind of writing I long to do more of, which may or may not be published elsewhere someday. No such thing happened. There was no wi-fi (although a lurker friend on Facebook, you know who you are!) gave me a hard time about all my Facebook updates, which were mostly photos of the beach.

No - I did not write, but I walked, 5 to 8 miles each day, along the beach. It was heaven and then some. I did not stick with WW completely, but I was not crazy either; I did gain one pound back, but that is a far cry from my typical "I'm-off-the-plan-so-let's-go-food-crazy." That is very different for me. I did have a second slice of Mack and Manco pizza... I admit that that was hot-melty-cheesy-crispy bliss and worth every bite... The best pizza ever and I say that as a New Yorker talking about New Jersey pizza.

And I slept... and slept. That was a real joy, I can promise you. I also got to see my friend Donna Marie many times; she lives nearby. That was a real joy too! I also got to see Donna's friend Sister Connie, RGS, who I had not seen since 1994 or 95! That was fun because Connie is an extrovert's extrovert and I say that as a pretty extroverted extrovert! I was walking into a shop one day and I have no clue how she saw me, but from a dining terrace next door (she had to have corner-turning-vision but I did not ask) Connie came flying into the store to say hello! I ended up sittting down with her and Sister Anita as they ate their lunch.

(we went to Atlantic City with Donna Marie, her husband and her mom; this is at Caesar's)

The best part of the vacation was spending so much time with Mark and Erica. While a 53 year old woman and her 15 year old stepdaughter are like some kind of off-the-charts hormonal bookends, just ask poor Mark about that, we do have a great relationship for which I thank God every day.

We went to the beach every day, we jumped in the waves and I was reminded of an 8 year old girl who loved the waves with wild abandon and inexplicably instantaneously loved me too, as I jumped in those waves with her, in Rhode Island not-so-many-years-ago.

Erica and I in 2006, another beach, another vacation.

And here we were in Ocean City, just last week.

Mark and I would take a walk on the beach every day and we both relished the amount of unfettered quiet time together. It was great and I felt myself humbled beyond imagination that God should have brought us back together in this way.

One of my favorite moments together was when we rode the ferris wheel, just the two of us, on the last night. (The ferris wheel makes Erica roll her eyes... too slow!)

Mark and Erica played their nightly game of air hockey at the arcade, a longtime tradition. I admit I loved seeing her win! They also played endless rounds of paddleball on the beach, a game that is more lost on me than the air hockey!

All in all it was a beautiful journey. There were - as there always are - hard moments. Anger, tears, frustration and the like, but there was also happiness, tranquility, joy and unity in ways that we don't see enough of, in general.

So no blog posts or chapters were written, although I sent postcards to everyone who asked for one. However, not unlike bread, ingredients were added, things will rise and will be consumed. It is in that consumption, counter-intuitively, that more is given than is taken, more is offered than is consumed and that is how we become One.

And that is why there will always be bread for me. Even - in fact, especially - in the Jersey Shore edition.

Go Check out The Parish Blog

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Mon, 25 Jul 2011 11:02:00 +0000

Please go check out the Parish blog for a fine post by Peter Avvento... click here.

A Blog Post About... Blogging, Blah-Blah Blogging

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Thu, 21 Jul 2011 13:00:00 +0000

It was not long ago when an interviewer called to talk to me about being a Roman Catholic blogger in the Albany diocese. For someone who always has a lot to say, I must admit to being a bit dumbstruck. The article appears here and includes my real-life friends Mary DeTurris Poust, Deacon Neil Hook and Fr. Richard Vosko. (For the record, with respect to the author of the article, I have corresponded with and interviewed the wonderful James Martin, SJ - but, befriend is a strong word. Deacon Greg Kandra on the other hand is a met-in-person, in regular touch with, beloved and trusted friend of mine. That's us over there!

I thought that my interview my come out all "errr.... ummm... well, you know..." I think it came out sounding like "blah-blah blogging!" At least that is my fear.

It was not the first time I have been interviewed on the topic and who knows if it will be the last.

Yesterday I was driving to my job at Immaculate Conception and was listening to the Parliamentary hearings from the UK around the phone hacking scandal. One of the members of parliament was talking about how media in general, including social media, needed better standards. (massive understatement!) He then referred to the "blags." It was his accent and I am not mocking, but it caught my attention. He then went on for a few moments about the "blags" and "blaggers." Blah-blah blogging!

The third thing on this circuitous path to a post is this. Earlier in the week I was at my home parish of St. Edward the Confessor, at a meeting with someone from a website design firm and the topic of the parish blog came up. This gentleman implied that blogging was on life support, a soon-to-be thing of the past. It did not make me happy to hear that, but there is some truth to it.

If you are a marketer. If you are a marketer or a news organization or anyone trying only to get quick attention, forget blogging. A 300 word post on your new product or service will be lost in the ad clutter. I did not spend 29 years in the media business for nothing; I get that. If I had a business it would be Twitter and Facebook, all the way.

So what is my long-winded point? (I told you I always have a lot to say!)

My point is this - I do not think blogging is going away any time soon. At least I hope not.

Blogging, which I have been doing in one form or another since 2007, has helped me to better see and understand the world around me and my own place in it - personally, spiritually and politically.

In the midst of hard core (who remain beloved to me) lefty bloggers, I found my political center. In the midst of a group of passionate Episcopalian bloggers, (who I continue to be in prayerful blogging/Facebook and real-life friendship community with) I discovered the depth of my Catholic faith. In addition I have had great discussions and learned much from Buddhists, Jews, atheists, Lutherans, Evangelicals, Pentacostalists, agnostics, Muslims, Hindus, humanists and of course, the SBNR people.(Spiritual but not religious.) Without a doubt, I am a better Catholic because of all of this, of that I am certain.

As for my Catholic blogging friends- we are engaged in discussions, theological and otherwise that are transformational for all of us. And I can promise you, we have many, many disagreements, but what binds us is our common love for the Church and how the Church is in the world!

If you are not familiar with blogging, which is quite different than reading a newspaper or some other static thing, blogging offers the chance for conversation via the comments. I also think that that is a big plus of using blogging and Facebook together, the opportunity to have a discussion.

That is how we are transformed. That is how community is discovered and built. Both this blog and the parish blog are about gathering community more than anything else.

In the past year this blog and my parish blog have both floundered a bit. Last summer I was very ill and the summer was lost to me. The fall proved to be too busy for a variety of over-committed reasons. Then came January and a new year presented our family with a major challenge when my husband's sister became ill and subsequently died, blogging fell to the bottom of the list. I had no time, I also had so little to say.

As I mentioned the other day, I am trying to find my footing again, but without you - well there is no footing! It is community and conversation that we are trying to build here, not a one-way-ideological-my-way-or-the-highway-zone.

If you are new, I welcome you and I sincerely hope that you will say something. If you don't want to comment, then please drop me an email and let me know that you are here.

Now, to think of things to write about. If you have ideas, you can put them in the comments to, or if you have questions.

I have to go now... I have a lot of blogs to read! (This will be cross-posted on The Parish Blog of St. Edward the Confessor)

There Will Be Blog!

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Tue, 19 Jul 2011 10:59:00 +0000

Yesterday,the esteemed Mike Leach published a second list of favorite Catholic blogs on his blog, Why Stay Catholic. Imagine my surprise to find my own name and this little bloggy-blog on the list!

Where is the fainting couch? And could someone bring me a little water and a fan? I was astounded.

I mean, go look at the list... Elizabeth Scalia, Eugene Kennedy and all the bloggers at NCR, Rose Pacatte, FSP, James Martin, SJ and other bloggers at America, Br. Dan Horan, OFM, Mike Hayes, Deacon Greg Kandra. As I said, which one of these is not like the other? (I have been very lucky to meet Rose, Dan, Mike, and Greg in person.)

In any event, I was gratefully astounded but also feeling the impacts of very little blogging of late... like very little.

I can tell you a bit why but let it suffice to say that the year that spanned from July 2010 to the present moment has been a momentous one and not always in a good way. Something had to go and the blog was left a little more than unattended.

In addition to Mike's kind addition of me to the list, I believe that there will be an article in this week's Evangelist, about Albany Catholic bloggers and that would include me.

Gulp.

As a Roman Catholic whose life is centered on living in a Eucharistic manner, I believe that there must be bread! Hence the name of the blog.

However there must also be blog and I am working on making a comeback. This blog is meant to be a place for spiritual reflections, memoir, thoughts about life and whatever flotsam and jetsam turns up, all expressed through a Catholic and catholic lens.

In the meantime, if you are a regular reader of my irregular posts, welcome back!

And if you are new to this page, I welcome you warmly.

There are things percolating in my heart and mind, there will be more blogging, but it may be a bit quiet as the summer continues.

I hope that you will consider putting me in your Google reader if you use one or perhaps subscribe to the email feed of the blog. If you are on Facebook, please friend me and please "like" the blog's Facebook page.

Thanks all!

The Body and Blood of Christ - June 26, 2011

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Sun, 26 Jun 2011 12:28:00 +0000

The Last Supper - Before and After Restoration

What is good Eucharistic theology?

When I made my First Holy Communion, as we said back in the day, in May of 1965 at Assumption Church in White Plains, NY, I knew all about kneeling, reverence and holiness. When I was not in the first or second pew fidgeting with my classmates, I did try hard to adopt all sorts of postures of holiness.

One thing I liked to do was to hold my the palms of my hands together so that all my fingers lined up and pointed to the sky. I thought that God liked the perfection of that. I also liked to have good posture when on the kneeler in the pew. Another important thing was how I knelt at the altar rail when I went to communion. I liked that it was red and smooth and just slightly plush, which cushioned my knees. I liked the feel of the cool marble of the altar rail if I were to even lean against or touch it accidentally. I also liked staring at my potential new boyfriend (who at the time I was sure that I would marry) Tommy Criscione. Tommy had that plum job as altar boy, wearing his red cassock and white surplice. I was so jealous but my crush on him overrode my feelings of envy.

Then there was the way that I felt - when the host melted I thought that Jesus was gone, not to return for another week! Panic would set in. Talk about panic - it would really set in when the white host would get stuck to the roof of my mouth. Uh-oh! While I liked the idea of Jesus hanging around a bit longer, I would get very upset. What if He got stuck there, like permanently? I would take my tongue and try to move Him around - gently and reverently of course - but what if I hurt him? I mean, did I not already hurt him enough with my 7 year old sinning? (And remember - I had a pleasant Catholic upbringing, this was from the not-hellfire-damnantion crowd!)

So much for reverence and holiness, the score so far:

Fran's self-focus - 10, Jesus the Lord - 0.

Oh it makes my head spin to consider it all!

Here we are today and on this great feast, one in which we celebrate the very centrality of our Catholic Christian faith, and one in which I pray we can find one thing to agree on... We truly believe that Christ is presence in the bread and wine that we consume.

Can we please start there and maybe stay there?

OK, good... let's see where that leads us. We agree that Christ is present to us in the bread and wine, Christ's Body, Christ's Blood.

We do not come to the table to have a linear experience of "Jesus 'n me." It is not about getting another bite that will allow us, if we are really good boys and girls, to stay out of hell for the next few days. Oh my gosh - what bad theology is that?

We do not come to the table to get a fix! We come to the table to be One in Christ.

We come to the table to not simply receive, but to give. It is Christ's sacrifice for us but also our sacrifice for him. No, I'm not talking about some hand-wringing-I-suffer-for-Jesus personal piety, but rather the sacrifice of self-gift. Self-gift meaning, here I am Lord, I am broken for you and your people as you were broken for us. I am poured out for you and your people Jesus, as you poured yourself out for us.

And in this act of giving, rather than just receiving, to use the Doxology, "through Him, with Him, in Him," we become One! One. One. One. Catholic. Universal. Unity. Communion. Common union. One. One. One.

If we could but start there and stay there, just rest awhile in that spot... No more fighting, just for a minute, OK?

Then we might remember that we are there to be transformed... not unlike the painting of the Last Supper. Renewed, revived. And when that happens we are given something and we can then give more to the world. Be transformed, transform the world! It is the dynamism of the Eucharist and what could be more exciting and more uniting than that?

I hope that we don't continue to argue about whether to kneel or stand, whether to take communion in the hand or on the tongue, whether one is "worthy" to come to the altar or not. Aren't we all unworthy, don't we say that in one voice, "Lord,I am not worthy..." None of us are worthy, yet we are invited to the table, over and over again.

We are given the chance anew to be one each and every day. Let us look to this day in which we commemorate the Body of Christ by actually being the Body of Christ. Let us re-member Christ today and not dismember Christ today. Let us do that each day, every day and for always and forever, in the name of Christ who is our Lord.

Amen and amen and amen.

A homily from Pope Benedict the XVI on this feast in 2008 is here.
Deacon Greg Kandra's fine homily from today is here.
It is not on the internet but Fr. Pat offered a fine homily which he refers to the restoration of the Michaelangelo's Last Supper. What a fine metaphor for us all.... as the painting got cleaned and restored, it became clearer. Just like the Eucharist does for us, as we grow to be one in Christ.

Invitation

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Sat, 25 Jun 2011 11:48:00 +0000

A post for a rainy Saturday morning...

How is challenge an invitation? I am sitting here reflecting on that right now. I am currently going through a process of discernment about my life as a lay minister of the Church.

Today I read this from St. Gregory of Nyssa in the Office of Readings:

Bodily health is a good thing, but what is truly blessed is not only to know how to keep one’s health but actually to be healthy. If someone praises health but then goes and eats food that makes him ill, what is the use to him, in his illness, of all his praise of health?

If one praises health and then eats food that makes one ill... That to me is a conversation about integrity. How often do we proclaim one thing and yet do another?

What a challenge it is to confront the things we "believe" and the things that we... well, the other things we believe. When we face the challenge of really entering into the uncomfortable places of reconciling belief,we are invited to a place of peace.

That will be the healthy meal, that will be what heals us and sets us free. Getting there however, is a whole other thing.

Nothing Is Simple - Some Thought Provoking Posts

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Fri, 24 Jun 2011 02:24:00 +0000

Is it possible to simply read things that we either agree with or disagree with and just ponder them for a bit? Now that school is over, I am taking some time to actually read some blogs. Tonight I opened Rambling Follower, Καθολικός διάκονος, Women In Theology (WIT), Quantum Theology, Of Course I Could Be Wrong, A Seat at the Table and Sean Philpott. I read a few other things too, but there are so many good blogs and so little time.

With blogs, Facebook and Twitter, it is easy to read and react. Lock and load. I am guilty of this and have been trying not to continue in that vein. (On Thursday night as I wrote this I linked to something that was not exactly what it seemed... so that is one of many examples of my own trigger finger.)

I also feel like I have been attacked for having an opinion that is different from others. Attacked is a strong word - but it is how I have felt at times. I don't really care, but it is an interesting place to be. One group of people seems to think me backward and another group seems to think that I lack obedience. It is an interesting place to be.

I always say that I am too far to the left for the right and too far to the right for the left. *sigh* Last time I checked, I never told anyone what they should think or do, but boy, do I get hit hard when I say certain things. Whatever - I am not a victim, but I remain curious about why this is.

Often I am told, what do you think will happen when you write about such things? Well, I guess one thing is that I hope that people will actually read things and not just infer them from the titles or links. I also guess that since I am not some big deal blogger with a zillion commenters from all over creation, that people who actually know me in some fashion might ask questions before shooting.

In any case, I am not trying to tell anyone to do anything; I guess I am always longing for actual conversation from people of diverse viewpoints on any number of challenging topics. Conversation in which we actually discuss in even tones why we do believe what we do and why.

Just sayin'... I know, call me a crazy dreamer.

In any case, I read many fine posts tonight, but I would like to focus on two of them. Both will have appeal and yet cause discomfort in ways that are interesting. They also remind me that nothing is as simple as it seems and that stopping to think might benefit us all.

Over at WIT, blogger Julia (all the women there are doing graduate or post-graduate work in theology) offered Reflections on Pregnancy. I've never been pregnant, so I have nothing to offer, but am always interested in reading about such things.

In any event, Julia writes about what she learned about pregnancy as she grew up Catholic and then what she learned about pregnancy... as a pregnant woman. Let it suffice to say, it was not always pretty. She then quickly moves into some very profound thoughts on what is needed during pregnancy and when women have children. Here is an excerpt or two...

Now I’m actually pregnant and I realize it is not that great. I actually really dislike being pregnant. I felt awful for (not just the first three months, but really) the first 4.5 months. By “awful”, I mean specifically that I thought I was going to throw up at any moment day or night 24/7. I often did, and when I didn’t I usually felt even worse. I couldn’t open my refrigerator door, I couldn’t cook or prepare my own food, I couldn’t food shop. The smells were too intense and the nausea was too debilitating. I didn’t feel like I was having a baby, I felt like I had become the baby.

She went on to say this...

There’s so much that could make pregnancy easier for women. Once I start brainstorming on the topic, I quickly become overwhelmed. There is so much that needs to change. I’ll just offer a few thoughts here. First, it would be a lot healthier if we adopted realistic language about pregnancy and childbirth in religious settings. We should talk about how bearing children is really difficult and becoming frustrated with the process does not mean that one has failed to accept any potential gifts that might exist alongside of the challenges. In churches that emphasize the role of Mary and, in particular, Mary’s role as mother of Jesus, we should be honest about the fact that Mary probably experienced a lot of pain and suffering—not only in childbirth, but also throughout the course of the pregnancy itself and into early motherhood.

Julia is weaving Jesus, Mary, nursing, receiving help, and having larger breasts and other sexual elements into an astounding post of remarkable thoughts about birth, life, community and transformation. If you've never thought about a woman nursing in Church, you will now. Go read it - it is seriously really well done. You can read it now by clicking here.

The other post I wanted to highlight also has to do with pregnancy, in a manner of speaking. This post *really* touched me deeply and I have run the gamut from wanting to post it right to Facebook to wanting to selfishly hide it.

The post is at Sean Philpott's blog. Sean is a bioethicist and I met him very briefly at Siena College in the spring of 2010. He was on a panel about bioethics hosted by my friend Benita Zahn, who had invited me to watch said panel. (Albany folk and Oswego types will know Benita as a TV anchor. What many do not know is that she also has a degree in bioethics. She truly is a renaissance woman with many interests and talents.)

Sean and I have, like so many people, developed a Facebook friendship. While he, Benita and I have talked about getting together, it has yet to happen. However, I love reading his updates and like so many online friendships, one has a sense of knowing so much about a person and yet not really knowing them at all.

Today when I noticed that Sean had an update, I thought it would be about his recent trip to Georgia (the country) and Estonia. When I clicked in, I saw the title, A Bioethicist's Education and I kind of wondered what I would be reading. Immediately I could see that he was writing about his nephew Pedro; Sean said that he would be turning one soon. Now Pedro lives quite a distance away from Sean, so he doesn't get to see him very often, but clearly he treasures his nephew. He said that he could not imagine a life without him.

Now comes the interesting part... Sean says that if Pedro's parents lived in the US, he might not have ever been born. I'll let Sean speak for himself. Remember - Sean is a bioethicist.

I can no longer imagine what my or my families’ life would be like without Pedro. Had his parents lived in the United States, however, it possible that he would have never been born.

This is because Pedro has Down syndrome, a common genetic abnormality that occurs in about 1 in 750 births.

Some of what follows does not come as a surprise, but some of it does. I want to be clear - Sean is a bioethicist that in his own words... well let me quote him, Sean says "I am an ardent supporter of reproductive choice." However, before he says that, he says this:

Women who receive a prenatal diagnosis of Down syndrome often choose to selectively terminate their pregnancy, so as not to bring a profoundly disabled child into the world. Some studies suggest that over 90% of all pregnancies with a Down syndrome diagnosis are terminated. But I wonder whether these women are making a truly informed and voluntary choice to terminate their pregnancies.

Remember - Sean supports reproductive choice, but it is also interesting that he says this.

Here is what I think of these two posts - I think that both authors are true to who they are, but they invite us into places that are not what we might think. Each of them goes into a place that is different.

Julia does not use cheap talk to glorify pregnancy. She uses Marian imagery and yet makes a real case about just how hard it can be to be pregnant and then uses that as an invitation to live differently about it. She issues a challenge of sorts.

Sean on the other hand has no wish to become an unwitting bioethicist poster child for pro-life issues. Yet he also steps outside of typical boundaries and examines, with the heart of a loving uncle and the mind of a bioethicist, how love and personhood matter. Then he issues a challenge of sorts.

Both writers are simply asking us to stop and... think. At least I think that is what they are saying. Isn't that why we express our opinions? What a waste it is to have all the shouting and no reflection, conversation, interaction.

Ultimately I'd like to invite everyone to read these pieces and then think about them. Like them or hate them as you wish. But think. I know who believes in what, who hates what, who stands for what.

What I'd like to know is what happens when you go to the places beyond one's tightly held beliefs and pokes around a little. It's risky, you never know where you'll come out, but hey, we all might learn something.

Nothing is simple after all, but then everything actually is pretty simple at the same time.

Back With More Reposting

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Sun, 19 Jun 2011 20:28:00 +0000

In the midst of trying to finish my paper on the Creed, an accompanying audio/video project and all the other matters of life, I reposted two older Trinity Sunday reposts.

However, I am back for a third... and why not! It is Trinity Sunday after all and that means three!

In the midst of life I have been reading and commenting on three (Trinity!) different posts. One is from Frank at Why I Am Catholic, and it is about the Corapi matter. I choose to not say much about that, but I did weigh in over at YIM in the comments. Humility is a gift and I think that God offers it to me all the time, but I am clumsy and drop it, don't notice that God is giving it to me or otherwise turn my nose up at it, however unintentionally.

The second post is from Allison (formerly of YIM) and now she hosts Rambling Follower, a relatively new blog. She wrote about an older couple who were seeking to marry in the Church and who had a less than great experience. In trying to look at the human side of things and explore how we can block the pathway to Christ, a flurry of comments came up about law, doctrine and rules. Now rules, doctrine and law matter, but without love they are nothing. Again, the blessed gift of humility is sought, with a dose of wisdom.

Finally our third example is from Deacon William Ditewig at Deacons Today: Dalmatics and Beyond. Bill was writing about the aforementioned Corapi matter and once again, a post generated some strong comments in the thread. So once more, I prayed for the gift of wisdom as I left my own comments.

All three posts remind me of the essential need and the foundational matter of the Roman Catholic Church and that is the intersection of the letter of the law and the spirit of the law. We must have both.

To which I now point you to a fine Trinitarian story called The Three Hermits by Leo Tolstoy and a post that first went up over at the parish blog in 2007. If there was ever a short tale that underscored the need for the spirit of the law, it is this one!

*****************************************************************************

I am away this weekend, but I have a moment and I wanted to republish this post from August of 2007. We have added many new readers since then, so this may be new to you.

It is a great reminder that we live in a day to day world of practical measures that often demands doing and saying more and more and more just to keep going... but that at the heart of the Trinity is a purity and a simplicity that is startling in its clarity.

Peace and Blessings to all.
*************************************************************************************

The Three Hermits is a short story by Leo Tolstoy, based upon on old Russian legend. It is a lovely allegory about prayer and simplicity.

The story basically says this- a bishop was traveling on a boat. When on this boat, he hears about some hermits. These hermits live on an island that the ship was passing. A fisherman told the bishop about being stranded overnight on that island and encountering these three holy hermits.

The bishop is compelled to go see this trio and convinces the captain of this ship to send him ashore in a rowboat. Off he goes to see these old men who are apparently living lives of simplicity and prayer.

Upon arrival he informs them that he wants to see what he can do to teach them something about the Lord. After all it would appear that he is so well schooled and learned as the bishop and they are but three simple ones on an island. The men say little. Undeterred, the bishop forges ahead and asks them to spell out just how they are saving their souls and serving God.

He quickly learns that they have but one prayer... "Three are ye, three are we, have mercy upon us". While happy to hear that they know the Trinity, the bishop now goes into an explanation of how to pray the right way. To this end, he attempts to get them to memorize the Lord's Prayer.

All day long he would say the words, the men would try and try to memorize and repeat them and each time the three holy, old men would just fumble their way through. Finally though they got it and the bishop was satisfied.

At this point the bishop takes his leave and as he rows back to the main ship he hears them praying the Lord's Prayer in unison. He is so pleased that he could share his great knowledge with these simple servants. Unable to sleep he is standing on deck in the silent night. He feels so good about how he could teach these men this prayer and he thanks God for the chance to have enlightened the island dwellers.

Suddenly he notices something white and shining traveling towards the boat. It was moving at such rapid speed he could not fathom what it might be! Needless to say he was alarmed and turned to the helmsman to see if he knew what was happening. The helmsman just about loses controls of the ship.

And in the great white light he could suddenly make out the three hermits running across the surface of the water! The helmsman nearly faints and the bishop is shaken to the core.

As the hermits neared the ship the holy old ones said in a single voice "We have forgotten your teaching, servant of God".

The bishop- realizing with gravity what has happened, simply tells them that their own original prayer will truly reach the Lord. Understanding that he - the great bishop - could not teach these men, he simply asked them to pray for "us sinners".

Three are ye, three are we, have mercy upon us.

This story so beautifully illustrates that sometimes the learned have much to learn from the simple. Which pretty much sounds like something Jesus tried to tell us in many ways.

If you would like to read the story please click here.

Trinity Sunday - Another Repost

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Sun, 19 Jun 2011 09:57:00 +0000

(Another repost from last year...)

Yesterday I put up a long post about Trinity Sunday. It is a study in relationship and it is a bit wordy!

Today I am reflecting on a more simple image that has been influenced by my friend Lindy, by some work from Richard Rohr and from Fr. Pat's homily that I heard at the 4pm liturgy.

Lindy suggested that we call this Imagination Sunday... and I think that imagination is at the heart of our faith, the heart of the Trinity, so I like the idea of focusing on imagination.

Richard Rohr and Father Pat both spoke about images and dynamics, although each a bit differently.

I am pondering God as Father - but God also as Creator, which implies power. Not power in the negative way that we often perceive it, but the power to imagine and to create, with great love.

I am pondering Jesus as Son - Jesus as human, vulnerable, weak. Not weak in a negative way that is easy to jump to but rather weak as in human. Vulnerable is really a better way to put it. Our culture rejects vulnerability, our faith demands it.

I am pondering the Holy Spirit as... Well, not as a Dove, not as a Flame. I am pondering the ruah, which means spirit and is feminine. Now to say that feminine is not always held up or considered as part of the prevailing male image of God is a whole other blog post or more!

God and Jesus are a horizon and that horizon is linear, the addition of the Spirit makes for a dyamic that mediates the Divine and Human natures and create the Trinity.

No, I'm not even sure of what I just wrote, but in my heart, in my imagination, I find comfort it in its truth.

Here is a lovely song for Trinity Sunday, courtesy of Paul Snatchko, who had it on his blog. Paul started out as a blog friend, as did Lindy. Having met them both I am grateful! I bring this up because our faith is incarnational and relational... the heart of the Trinity.

Trinity Sunday - Reposted from 2010

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Sun, 19 Jun 2011 09:53:00 +0000

(This was originally posted last year, but due to time challenges, it shows up again!)

Look at that image for a moment if you will. The Father is not the Son. The Father is not the Spirit. The Son is not the Father. The Son is not the Spirit. The Spirit is neither Father nor Son.

All are God. Each one is God. It bears repeating… All are God. Each one is God. And yet God is one!

Even for those of us who believe in this One God of Three Persons, there is a good deal of mind bending that can go on if we try to understand the Trinity in our Western-Culture-Meets-Left-Brain manner. This manner often includes seeing “three persons” as we imagine persons – God as white haired, bearded and maybe slightly scary old man, Jesus as either Western European handsome or bleeding and wounded and finally the Holy Spirit as a dove or maybe a lick of flame.

None of that really breaks through to make the Trinity manifest as our God who is so present in ways that we struggle to recognize and respond to in our lives.

None of that really breaks through to make the Trinity manifest as our God who is so present in ways that we struggle to recognize and respond to in our lives.

When we use the word mystery in relation to the Trinity it can act as a polite excuse… “Oh, the Trinity! “ (ahem, clears throat) “That! It is a mystery!” And with such, we are potentially absolved from getting a headache trying to put the triangular trinity peg into a round left-brain hole!

Thus ends so much study of the Trinity and that is very sad. At the heart of the Trinity is a constant self-revelation of God and relationship, community. These are not abstract concepts but something very real and something we must be in relationship with in order to respond, participate and cooperate with God.

We can’t use mystery as a manner of abandoning our place in the relationship with a God that is relationship. If it is mystery, then we must enter into that mystery, not abandon it.

Let's refocus... How do you imagine God in relationship with you?

"God’s To-Be is To-Be in relationship, and God’s being-in-relationship-to-us is what God is.” Catherine Mowry LaCugna, from her book, God For Us

Think about that for a moment… “God’s being-in-relationship-to-us is what God is.’ God’s being in relationship is what God is. This makes the old-bearded-white-haired-man seem less likely to me. In fact this brings to mind images of relationship from the Song of Songs:

“Set me as a seal on your heart,
as a seal on your arm:
For stern as death is love,
relentless as the netherworld is devotion,
Its flames are a blazing fire.”

This is no longer God looking down at me, but rather the God of relationship, all three-in-one of God, staring at me, calling me into relationship in a most intimate and passionate way.

And it is a little bit uncomfortable!

So yes, this is mystery, but it is mystery as invitation and welcome, not mystery as an impediment of understanding, or mystery as confusion.

God – as Trinity, God – as invitation, God – as Love… in three persons. If a symbol is what it does and if the etymology of the word symbol is a combination of “token or mark” and “to throw” we can understand little else other than something real has been thrown at us. It has also pursued us in endless relationship.

This Trinity-relationship also negates individualism – which is probably one of, if not the greatest challenge to Trinitarian understanding and engagement in our culture. Our most basic national values are based on a kind of individualism that is antithetical to this God of Trinitarian relationship.

We are often so focused on our own relationship with God, that it can be easy to forget or ignore that our relationship with God is completely dependent on our relationships with others.

The model for understanding this in some way is to pray, to study and to simply be with the Trinity, God, Father and Son in ever present and constant motion and engagement with one another.

Come Holy Spirit Come, We Are Gathered in One Place on Facebook and Blogs

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Sat, 11 Jun 2011 12:13:00 +0000

A Reflection on the readings for Pentecost.

A long time ago I heard a homily on Pentecost that has never left me... The priest said these words and whatever else he said has evaporated in my mind, but not the main point of his message.

"Easter makes me not afraid to die; Pentecost makes me not afraid to live."

He spoke these words as my faith was being renewed and as I tentatively returned to the Catholic church. They really stuck and have lived on in my heart. I wish I could even remember his name, he was a visiting priest, but no, that is gone too.

I've spent a lot of time since then, about 20 years ago, trying not to be afraid to die or live, but have only made limited progress on both. This I know, the more deeply I enter into the life of faith and the more intimately that I become part of the unity of the Body that being Church calls us to, the more those words have helped me.

Are you on Facebook? So many people are - astounding numbers of people. It is quite remarkable to watch. A big part of my own ministerial life is lived online. There are many conversations about whether this is "good" or "bad." Sadly, I hear more about the "bad" but that just returns me to the not being afraid part.

One of the great things about not being afraid to "live" online would be the many chances for evangelizing and being evangelized, the many opportunities for interaction in the name of Christ and a constant demand for the presence of the Holy Spirit to guide our ways.

"Living" online, especially in matters of faith, came to mind as I read and prayed with the first reading from the Acts of the Apostles.

When the time for Pentecost was fulfilled,
they were all in one place together.

We are not all physically "in one place together" but when we gather at a blog or participate in a Facebook conversation, we actually are together. If it is a faith post, then we are hopefully there in the name of Christ.

And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit
and began to speak in different tongues,
as the Spirit enabled them to proclaim.

Well we are certainly all out there, speaking in what would seem "different tongues." In the past week alone, I have participated in several conversation threads on Facebook and each one has left me, and no doubt others, frustrated. We were all talking about somewhat the same thing... why couldn't we understand each other?

What we hear described in that reading is the rush of the Holy Spirit, coming to enable each one to hear, no matter what the language. Once again, I am grateful for our Roman Catholic imperative to not interpret Scripture literally. This reading was not some early iteration of BabelFish or Google translate, but rather the Spirit coming to unify the many voices.

Oh please Holy Spirit, come to Facebook, please! Enlighten us, open us up, give us wisdom, give us charity, give understanding please!

For those of us who do profess our faith in Christ Jesus, we are called to literally "re-member" the Body of Christ. In doing so we must find ways to speak and be heard in One Voice. That is another gift of our Church, we are many members of One Body - not each parish unto itself, but part of a much larger liturgical whole.

Also it is our mission as Christians to unify (unify, not wrestle to the ground in dominating submission) God's people as one in Christ. So this would really required that whole "understanding the many voices" part of Pentecost.

So as I return to my Facebook and blogging "mission" I will once again, God knows I start anew each day, to doing so taking the words of another Catholic with me. About a month ago, Catholic writer and blogger, Elizabeth Scalia (aka The Anchoress) was in Rome at the first ever Vatican Bloggers Meetup. She spoke about and wrote about the need to be present online "with clarity and charity."

Doing so is very difficult and I know that I struggle with it all the time. As I said, just in the past week alone, I was in several online discussions that turned intense, one into a skirmish of sorts. And one of them was with Elizabeth Scalia herself; we descend into these things more often than I care to admit and I am the instigator of sorts; going to her FB page or blog and saying something that is not necessarily in sync with her or her readers. However I really want to understand what they are saying and I can only hope and pray that they understand me.

It has been a marginally successful effort, but we press on in faith. At least Elizabeth and I do!

Does this mean that we fold up our tents and go home? No. It means that we are called to what that same Elizabeth spoke of... interacting with clarity and charity. That is what we are called to as Catholics, Christians, all followers of Christ. And to do so means to wait in hope for, listen to and cooperate with the great Holy Spirit, whose arrival comes to us at Pentecost.

So do not be afraid to die, our hope is in resurrection. But do not be afraid to live, our hope is in the restoration of The Body of Christ.

Healing Prayers Are Needed... And Practical Help

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Tue, 07 Jun 2011 11:09:00 +0000

Photo of the Cottone Family - John Carl D'Annibale/Times Union

When I was at Spring Enrichment this year, I saw a friend that I knew from previous SE experiences. She seemed a bit pre-occupied when I waved hello, but I did not think anything of it.

After seeing her for a third time, she stopped and apologized for her distance. It turns out that she was more than pre-occupied; she was overwhelmed. She then went on to tell me the story of her daughter's family and their many health issues and challenges.

Her daughter, Margie, had gotten married and moved to Georgia. Margie and her husband Tony had a son, Jayden. When Margie became pregnant again, it turned out that there were tremendous issues with the fetus who was baby Lexi.

They were living in Georgia and expecting their second child, but 20 weeks into the pregnancy the couple learned their unborn daughter had deformities. She was missing a bone in her arm, and doctors said she had no toes or fingers. Doctors predicted the fetus would not survive because her lungs were filled with fluid.

All of this is told in a story about the Cottone family in today's Times Union, which you can find here.

Alexis Cottone - 7 months old Photo by John Carl D'Annibale/Times Union

Ever since my friend Carol had told me the story, I had been thinking about it. Carol had given me a flier telling the story and announcing a fund raiser for the family, but it had gotten dog eared in my tote. Late last week I emailed the person whose name was on this flier and got myself another copy. It has been on my mind to find a way to publicize this story and event, but I had not done so.

While I am very sad for this family, I am glad that they landed on the front page of today's paper. This will hopefully give the matter some prominence so that more help can be given.

If you have not already read the story, here is the what followed... Lexi's health challenges proved to be great after being born and diagnosed with thrombocytopenia-absent radius syndrome. Tony and Margie felt that it would be best for them all to pull up stakes and return to the Capital District, which they did. Two weeks later Tony had a seizure and was found to have a stage 2 mixed oligoastrocytoma mass in his brain.

Seriously - you could not make this up.

Right now the family is making their way. If you you are in the area, consider attending the fund raiser which will be held at The Inn at Saratoga at 5pm on Saturday or making a donation. Details about both are at the end of the article.

And if you pray, please keep this family in your prayers. As Margie said in the story... "I've always been a religious person, so I pray every day -- and that helps me,"

Please pray with and for Margie and the Cottone family and thanks for doing what you can to help by donating or by putting this story on your blog and/or Facebook page, or Twitter feed!

Easter Reflections - June 2, 2011, Ascension Thursday - Why Are You Standing There Looking At The Sky?

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Thu, 02 Jun 2011 09:39:00 +0000

Ascension Thursday - June 2, 2011

Why are you standing there looking at the sky?

Jesus has ascended to heaven and if all we can do is look at the sky, we might be in trouble.

It is important to be aware of Jesus, but it seems, like the disciples themselves, we want to stand there, heads up, eyes fixed upon the great blue and beyond of the sky. Now I am willing to give the disciples some slack, can you imagine standing there and seeing this? However, not unlike the Resurrection, the instruction seems clear... He is not here. The angelic messengers are there to remind us to get up and go, there are things to be done in Jesus' name.

It also seems that we are not to be focused on when Jesus will be back or how, but to live out the promise that being baptized in the Holy Spirit holds for us. Pentecost is a week from Sunday, they day we celebrate that baptism of fire and wisdom.These days in between Ascension and Pentecost are important ones, as we pray for the coming of that wisdom and our willingness to receive it.

The other day I read this post from Richard Rohr and it really struck me. He wrote, “Prayer happened today—and I was there!” I think that we are reminded in words such as those, not to just stand there and stare upwards but to be present and engage.

Jesus has ascended and we are called to show up in prayer and hope. We can't just look at the sky! In living today's Gospel we see that God invites us more deeply into the dynamism of Jesus' transforming work. We need to "be there" when these things happen and as Jesus tells us "Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations..."

We don't do this by craning our necks at the sky or by forcing people to follow Jesus. Transformation happens when we live as Christ in the world and the healing, saving, power of Jesus is made real.

In order to be disciples we must show up, have a look up as needed and then be there to show up for and live the prayer that is our mission. The mission is to unify and to heal, to restore the very Body of Christ.

I know I'd rather look up at the sky, but it seems we must do otherwise.

A Post About What? Liberty, Dreams and Hope.

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Sat, 28 May 2011 14:24:00 +0000

New York Liberty's Plenette Pierson (33) center, protects the ball as Chinese National's Xu Nuo (16), left, defends during their WNBA basketball game on Friday, May 27, 2011, at Times Union Center in Albany, N.Y. (Cindy Schultz / Times Union)

Last night, Mark, Erica and I went to see the New York Liberty play the Chinese National Women's Basketball team (no great link available) at a WNBA exhibition game at the Times Union Center here in Albany. We have seen The Conneticut Sun play at Mohegan Sun before; we like women's basketball games.

I was struck by something as I watched the game and took note of a group of girls who sat behind the basket and cheered the game with tremendous enthusism. As a 53, almost 54 year old woman, the scene before me was something that I would have never seen as a child.

In say, 1970, when I was 13, there was no such thing as a professional women's basketball league. Women? Professional sports? Tennis, gymnastics, swimming, figure skating were around, but not baseball, basketball, etc. Yes of course, we have all seen A League of Their Own, but that was a moment in time. An important moment and one that would have impact later, but not just yet.

In any event, I wanted to be a hockey player when I was a kid. Today I have friends who play women's ice hockey, but at that time, I kept my dirty little pucked up secret to myself. I went skating as often as I could and each time I laced up my white figure skates, I longed for black hockey skates, a helmet and a stick. The strong desire of it - almost sexual in nature, it was that potent - would make me blush to myself and I would stuff it down as I headed off to skate nicely in circles with the other girls.

Then there was the matter of the racial integration, a matter that was (and sadly still is in many ways) working itself out in the 60's and early 70's. To see the NY Liberty, women, both black and white was very moving to me.

Let's add the third thing in - playing the Chinese national team. I recall Nixon's trip to China in 1972... It was a big deal, but when I was 10, 11, 12, 13... none of this had happened yet. China was still a monster of a country, "communists!" We had to almost hiss that word out between our teeth, lest it sound like something we might want to become. Considering the communist threat was like seeing a swarm of ants about to overtake that piece of potato chip that fell to the ground at the picnic. Watch out! They will consume!

So here I was, watching an event that simply could not have taken place when I was a girl. This made looking over at the 12 year old girls who are members of the AAU basketball team, Lady Dreams. all the richer.

Members of the Lady Dreams AAU basketball team for 12-year-olds cheer for the New York Liberty WNBA team as they play Chinese National on Friday, May 27, 2011, at Times Union Center in Albany, N.Y. (Cindy Schultz / Times Union)

The kids were so excited and really seemed to enjoy every minute of the game. And a fine game it was, although at the start, NY seemed a bit slow and the Chinese so nimble. The Chinese women did not look muscular or toned, but they were fast, agile and made great shots. Come the second half however, and wow did things change. The Liberty took off and ended up winning 79-65.

If you have never seen a WNBA game, I do recommend one. Even if you are not a basketball fan, I can't tell you what a joy it is to watch these women on the court. They are there with passion and I say that both in general and with specificity to each particular game. I am also keenly aware that this appears to be a truly team sport... one does not see individual superstars but the efforts of a group of women with a common goal. It is fantastic and a fresh breeze in the culture of individual mega-stars of sports and otherwise.

Today, Mark McGuire of the Times Union wrote a fine piece about last night's event. It was entitled, Those in the stands the real story. I was sad - and was aware of it last night, that there was little press coverage. Mark (my husband) noticed Mark (the journalist) because he knows him professionally. There was a photographer from my Mark's TV station. It was clear that this was not a big event.

(I took this with my phone; we were in the first row, not far from the NY Liberty bench.)

Yet, it was a big event for those of us who were there. The cheering was evident and the excitement of the crowd, including and most especially, the kids of the Lady Dreams.

Another fine moment was watching a little girl, all the way on the other side of the arena, dance with wild abandon, as well as real talent, during half-time. She just got her tiny self into the aisle and when the music played, she moved. Such joy, such life! That is liberty, isn't it?

So what is the point of all this? In my own slow-moving and long winded way I am writing about liberty, dreams and hope.

In 1970 none of what I watched in 2011 would have been possible, yet here I was enjoying it all. It reminded me that there is no worse enemy than my own discouragement.

Pay attention, (you knew that there had to be a religious point in here somewhere, right?) signs of the resurrection are everywhere. Even at the TU Center when the NY Liberty plays China.

We Have Nothing

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Mon, 23 May 2011 10:40:00 +0000

I was reading Claire's blog this morning and she quoted Jessica Powers. Powers was a Carmelite nun and poet; you can read more about her at this link.

Reading Powers' words suddenly drew me back to another chapter of my life; one early in my return to Church. A then-priest then-friend of mine gave me a book of Jessica Powers' poetry and this helped me to find my way when I felt lost.

Then I went looking around and found this gem.

If You Have Nothing

The gesture of a gift is adequate.

If you have nothing: laurel leaf or bay

no flower, no seed, no apple gathered late,

do not in desperation lay

the beauty of your tears upon the clay.

No gift is proper to a Deity;

no fruit is worthy for such power to bless.

If you have nothing, gather back your sigh,

and with your hands held high, your heart held high,

lift up your emptiness!

-Jessica Powers, OCD

We have nothing, that is for certain. All is gift, all is from God. And no gift is proper for such a generous God.

So today, I will simply do as Powers' suggests; I will gather my sigh, hold my hands and my heart up and reveal that great emptiness to this great God that brings us from nothing to everything.

Thanks be to God.

A Sunday Reflection

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Sun, 22 May 2011 12:13:00 +0000

Today is the Fifth Sunday of Easter; we had 18 children making First Eucharist at the 4pm Mass on Saturday here at St. Edward the Confessor, Clifton Park. It was really beautiful to behold!

A number of things came to me as I read and studied the readings for today. In the First Reading from the Acts of the Apostles, we hear this:

As the number of disciples continued to grow,
the Hellenists complained against the Hebrews
because their widows
were being neglected in the daily distribution.

What a reminder that the Acts of the Apostles is such a rich treasure of church history. It is so easy to get lost in imagining a church like our own - well except for electricity and all! No - in all seriousness, we must constantly remind ourselves that the early church was so very different from what we live today.

First of all, this reading is clear in reminding us that this early church was not separate, but part of Judaism! Do we really allow ourselves to consider that fully? And as the followers of Jesus spread, the Hellenists, or those of Greek culture, became part of this new movement that was becoming a church.

Another thing that comes to mind is that the ministry of deacon, which is addressed in the reading, is a ministry of outward facing service.

In the second reading, a most beautiful one from St. Peter, we hear these beautiful words...

Beloved:
Come to him, a living stone, rejected by human beings
but chosen and precious in the sight of God,
and, like living stones,
let yourselves be built into a spiritual house
to be a holy priesthood to offer spiritual sacrifices
acceptable to God through Jesus Christ.

We are the living stones... the church is not a building but a people. This people - that would be us - become church, we are church. We are living stones! We are also reminded that the stone that was rejected, that would be Jesus Christ, became the cornerstone.

Then our Gospel, our beautiful Gospel from John:

Jesus said to his disciples:
“Do not let your hearts be troubled.
You have faith in God; have faith also in me.
In my Father’s house there are many dwelling places.
If there were not,
would I have told you that I am going to prepare a place for you?

I don't know about you, but when I read and heard this I thought about the news that dominated the world for days... The prediction that said that the world would end on May 21, 2011 at 6pm.

Oh I could write page upon page about this sad event. The original prediction by Harold Camping, which said the world would end in 1994, only impacted a small number of his followers. When it did not come, he recalculated and came up with May 21. Only this time, he had the power of the internet and all other media that had this thing going and going.

If you watched WNYT Newschannel 13 on Friday, you may have seen reporter Abigail Bleck presenting this apocalypse story. (In full disclosure, my husband Mark Szpylczyn works at Newschannel 13, but he did not work on this story.) Abigail interviewed Fr. Bob Longobucco, pastor of St. Helen's in Niskayuna. Father Bob said, among other things:

Like Harold Camping, all Christians are waiting for the second coming of Jesus. But "Father Bob" suggests it won't happen like Camping predicts.

"When He came the first time He came in love and generosity. I can't believe He's coming differently the second time."

Jesus came in love and generosity. Amen! And why would that be different this time? Amen!

So, getting back to the Gospel, isn't that what Jesus is talking about now? Look at what Jesus said - do not be troubled or afraid! There are many dwelling places!

Jesus speaks to us with love, in hope and filled with generosity and mercy.

As I look back over these readings and consider the message of this Sunday I am heartened and grateful. Serve others. Be Church. Have hope.

And what could be better than all of that?

***A serious prayer request** Please do pray for the followers of Harold Camping. Many, many people took him seriously and stopped working, spent money to help spread the word about 5/22, and more. They must be crushed and if not, they are still potentially financially ruined. Just read about the Carson family chronicled, among others, in this article.

I did a lot of online joking about this event, but when I read that, I realized that it is not always funny. My friend Michael Dresbach, an Episcopal priest living in Panama also had some very worthwhile reflections to read along these lines. He blogs as Padre Mickey and you can read him here.

Signs of Life

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Thu, 19 May 2011 11:48:00 +0000

We do not exist for ourselves alone, and it is only when we are fully convinced of this fact that we begin to love ourselves properly and thus also love others. What do I mean by loving ourselves properly? I mean, first of all, desiring to live, accepting life as a very great gift and a great good, not because of what it gives us, but because of what it enables us to give to others. Thomas Merton, No Man Is an Island

(It does not take long after the earth is scorched for green to reappear.)

Yes, I am still alive. I have really and truly neglected this little bloggy piece of real estate and I am so sorry. Is anyone even out there anymore? Yoo hoo!

I can't blame anyone for leaving, I have essentially ignored you. But not on purpose! If you are still here - thank you, thank you!

What a strange year this has been... One full of grace, yet one full of - well full of all the things that make grace. The gifts have been many, but the road to get there has not been smooth.

One year ago I was generally feeling unwell and in early July I entered the hospital, via that oh-so-fun-at-2am ER route. Good Lord, what was I thinking? Not in going to the ER, what was I thinking in ignoring my health and the pain I had been in?

That ate up most of the summer and then poof- it was fall and I was taking two grad school classes. Let's file that under the "mistakes were made" file because it really kicked my you know what and I was not really recovered yet. Add to that other activities, the women's retreat group at St. Edward's, general life matters and so forth.

It's ok, I'm cool - that is what I was thinking anyway.

Then the holidays zoomed by and I really felt sad about not fully enjoying them as I might have. It's ok, I'm cool. Did I really think that?

I did.

Fine, now it is January and I'm going to get it together! I have somehow (foolishly) registered for two classes again. After class #1 of the first class, I knew I would not do well in it, so I dropped it. (I was not, as the saying goes, "feelin' it.") The very next day I drop the class... awesomeness!

Two weeks later my sister-in-law, Mark's sister Olga, has surgery.

Then everything changes... she is going to die.

It is at this point that I really began to abandon the blog, which is understandable. What I also abandoned however, was my writing. What's wrong with me? One needs nutrition, sleep and exercise. In my life, I also need writing.

As some of you know, Olga died in March. We have continued to deal with this, an event which has had enormous reverberations, practical, spiritual, emotional, financial reverberations, in an on-going way. We do so clinging tightly to one another. Remember that grace part I mentioned at the beginning.

So here we are, slightly out of step calendar-wise but totally in step with otherwise, the Easter journey. Life, death, resurrection, new life. Lather, rinse, repeat.

About that Thomas Merton quote at the top. Isn't that what life is? If I have learned anything in this past year it is this - life is more about what we give to others. That sounds pretty simplistic. It is anything but.

So I am going to try to work my way back here. I am still over-committed, but working on whittling that down. Priorities must be re-established. I need to try to remember to breath. I can do this.

But I can't do it without you. I hope you are still there. Signs of life from here... are you there? I'm still here, I know someone is there. Thanks be to God!

Easter Reflections - Faith Happens In Community Wednesday April 27, 2011 by Fran Rossi Szpylczyn

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 10:54:00 +0000

Faith Happens in Community - A Reflection for April 27

Four years ago today, I walked into St. Edward the Confessor and my life changed forever. Mark and I were going to be married here at the church the next day. However, on Friday the 27th, I made a split second decision to go to daily mass. Even if I had not done that, my life would have changed on the 28th, but this decision set other things in motion.

In a rare moment, I was cooperating with grace!

During the homily Father Pat Butler asked a question and me being me, I decided to boldly answer it. A brief discussion occurred and as a result I was made known to the community gathered for liturgy. After mass some of the women wanted to talk to me and this also opened the door for me to get to know Father Pat.

Which, if you read this blog at all - has resulted in many things.

This was to end a long cycle of silent, anonymous church attendance and to create a life for Mark, Erica and me that we could not have imagined.

So what on earth does that have to do with today's readings?

Faith happens in community.

Today's Gospel from Luke is the story of Emmaus. While many of us know it well, it bears some repeating, as the Gospel always does. The two disciples are walking along the road when a stranger starts to talk to them. This stranger seems to not know what had just happened, so the two disciples start to tell him the story. They end up inviting him to eat with them and that is when it is revealed in the breaking of the bread... He is Jesus the Risen Lord!

The two were walking away from their community, even if unintentionally. They seem to have given up and are still smarting since they thought that Jesus was "the one." Well as it turns out, Jesus is of course "the One!"

It is in the meal, it is in community that Jesus is found and our faith comes alive.

That is what happened to me 4 years ago as I was preparing to marry and move to a community where I knew my soon-to-be husband and step-daughter and no one else. I was not walking away dejectedly - no not at all. But I was walking alone and about to become part of a family. And I was committed to church but was I really committed to community?

Recent history had seen me separate from a long standing group of close friends and I had sat silently in pews of Catholic churches that I faithfully attended but never became a part of. My belief and faith were strong enough - but had not fully blossomed.

To encounter Jesus is not just the sustenance of silent, contemplative prayer - although that is a part of prayer - but to encounter Jesus is to be in community. The sacramental nature of the Catholic church is lived out in encounter and grace is mediated in sacrament. This ultimately means that in bread and wine and one another, through Big S and small s sacraments, we encounter Christ.

That is why (no offense intended to those who identify as such - which I once did, a long time ago), being "SBNR" doesn't make sense to me. Even my being Roman Catholic but doing so in a completely isolated way does not really make sense.

It is not until we are part of community - with all the gifts and burdens that community brings - that our faith can be deepened. Perhaps this means another community besides the Roman Catholic church, but ultimately it is only through and with one another that we truly can meet the God who walks with us as the Christ.

Walk with Christ, come to the table, engage and be a part of the community. That is the message of Emmaus that I experience and that is the ever present invitation from our God who cannot be understood, but experienced.

I Have Fixed My Eyes On Your Hills - A Meditation on Palm Sunday 2011

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Sun, 17 Apr 2011 15:19:00 +0000

Palm Sunday is here and Holy Week begins. Many liturgies today will begin with a portion from Matthew's Gospel; the I am not at home this weekend and it feels very strange to be away from my own parish community on such a day.

As I read the readings and Gospel for today, I am reminded of something very personal - the recent passing of my husband's sister, Olga Szpylczyn. Is this too personal and far from the readings? I don't know - it is all I can offer today. Like Jesus, Olga knew where she was headed and it was not going to be pretty. Death would not come by riding on the best horse.

Say to daughter Zion,
“Behold, your king comes to you,
meek and riding on an ass,
and on a colt, the foal of a beast of burden.”

Olga, who was anything but meek in life began to embrace who she was as she plied her way on the journey. She did so without fanfare or remarkably without much fear. Olga, as the very hard-working daughter of extremely hard-working immigrants was used to achievement in the classic American cultural sense of the word. If she wanted to book the limo, she could. While she would not typically do such a thing, she did know that she could because she had worked hard and achieved it. She was not arrogant, but she was clear about the relationship between work and rewards as seen in our society.

Her journey into death was not the one she imagined. Will any of our own journeys into death be what we imagine? Probably not - most of us can't or won't imagine them until we are forced to. That is when the game change begins.

So she rode on her beast of burden as all of us who loved her surrounded her with prayer. We wanted the limo to take her back to us. She stayed on that damn ass with her eyes on the Lord. The song in the video below reminds us "though I cannot see the end for me, I cannot turn away." She did not turn away.

There is so much more to the Sacred Scriptures for today, but all I can think of is Olga, settled in for her ride. She met death without compromise and tumbled into the arms of God.

She journeyed to Jerusalem, as we all must do. Rest in peace dear Olga.

The Smell of the Resurrection

noreply@blogger.com (Fran) — Sun, 10 Apr 2011 15:57:00 +0000

A reflection on today's readings, Sunday, April 10, 2011.

"This gorgeous NE Missouri spring morning is the kind of morning that reminds me that the home stretch of Lent is always the hardest--that the smell of the resurrection of nature is just around the corner, and about to burst at the seams--It makes me absolutely itchy for Easter resurrections of all sorts." - Maria L. Evans

I read the words you see above on Maria's facebook page; she blogs at Kirkepiscatoid. When I read them, they knocked me back a bit, but that was a few hours ago and I had nothing that I could say about them. Or about today's readings.

We are coming upon it now... This is the Fifth Sunday of Lent, we've been at this awhile and we are tired. Well, I'm tired anyway, I can't speak for you. I'm really tired. Lent began and my sister-in-law Olga was alive, now she is not. Lent began with death and ashes and it got to be real death and ashes around here. I feel weary and frustrated. I do not doubt but I do get to shaking my fist at God from time to time.

In any case, I read Maria's words and they rested in my heart. I read Shannon's blog post about today's readings. I read Richard Vosko's homily. I thought about how today is the 56th anniversary of the death of Pierre Teilhard de Chardin, SJ. I read about Faith and the Cosmos. I continued to ponder the often angry and vitriolic dialogue I often encountered on the internet, diatribe that I once participated in and am still tempted to. That made me restless so I watched a TV program about women rabbis, including the first Orthodox woman rabbi, Rabba Sara Hurwitz. (Also featured were Andrea Warnick Buchdahl and Dianne Cohler Esses.)

Nothing. Dry bones in my heart and in my head. There was nothing else that I could do, so I got the leash and Gracie and I headed out to the beautiful day.

I decided to check out a nearby park/path that I had never explored before, so off I went with ideas like the smell of the Resurrection, science and faith, and the ordination of women dancing in my head. The sun was warm and comforting, the scent in the air held promise. Plus, I was in the mood to go somewhere that I had never been before.

Turning into the parkway and path, I immediately noticed the woods all around. Many of the trees were fallen, strewn like toothpicks after a giants' banquet. They lay crisscrossed on either side of the path. Some had holes bored into them and I could imagine the din of the woodpecker that left his signature. Some had peeling bark, reminding me of bad sunburns gone worse. Some were just remnants of the fine trees they once were, left to die on the side of the pathway.

Gracie pulled me forward, this was a cornucopia of scents for her, such delight. We crossed one little wooden bridge over a creek and then another. I stopped to look down.

Oh. My. God.

The water that ran was clear and light, it was dancing through the furrow in the dirt. However, it wasn't the water alone that caught me off-guard, it was the green. Coming up all around were green shoots. Some were more unfurled than others, but they were all there. Evidence of life, new life.

Then there were those fallen trunks. As I walked I began to study them more closely. Some had moss growing on them, others had ferns. Ferns and flowers were pushing up in the open areas too.

Those decomposing trees were giving new life. The dry bones were coming to life, like Lazarus called back! It was the smell of the resurrection made manifest in this patch of forest in my sleepy suburb!

That was it. New life comes all the time, even if I do not expect it or want it. Olga had died, but she comes to new life. Teilhard de Chardin is dead but his ideas are not and he is no longer silenced. Some of my ideas about life took their last breath and I continue to have a hard time letting them go, but die they do and they bring new life.

The bones will come to life, the dead will dance and the spirit will be put into us. I always wonder -will I, will we, be ready?