This Week at FPCSB

Moved...

2011-05-11T16:21:00.000-07:00

It's time for a new beginning.

The new blog: See You Sunday.

The new church website: FPCSB.

First Press - April 2011

2011-04-04T16:22:00.000-07:00

First Press 11-04

First Press - March 2011

2011-03-11T18:09:00.000-08:00

11-03-Press

Possibilities

2011-02-03T14:37:00.001-08:00

On Sunday, we were visited by John Witvliet, the director of the Calvin Institute for Christian Worship. He is usually based in Grand Rapids, Michigan, but for this academic year he is on a research sabbatical at Fuller Theological Seminary in Pasadena. The clever Dotti Garcia observed that this was a great opportunity, and invited him to come as a guest preacher and visit us. He seemed right at home, and it was refreshing to hear him open God’s word for us, and invite us to engage in worship that transforms our view of the Upside-Down world in which we live. It was fun to listen to him ‘think out loud’ at lunch about churches who have used their Worship Renewal Grant process as a way of deepening their connection to God and to each other. I was energized and inspired about all the possibilities.

On Monday, I went to visit Curtis Middle School, the most economically disadvantaged middle school in our district. My tour guides were member Christa Wallis, who is a district employee and member of our Adult Ed committee, and her daughter Sharon Wallis who is teaching reading intervention at the school. Christa and Sharon brought a proposal to our Session at the end of last year that First Pres experiment with providing support to Curtis as part of our ministry to our local community. What might we do, we wondered, to encourage teachers who are teaching in challenging circumstances? What might we do to help a school succeed? How might we help students become readers by the time they leave middle school- and what kind of difference might that make in their lives? Principal Marlene Bicondova is a delight- professional, warm, and compassionate. A Christian who worships in Riverside, she longs to create a safe environment where children can succeed. She dreams that they will gain 45 more points this year on their Annual Performance Index scores, so their school can break the 700 mark. She understands the profound challenges her parents and staff and children face, and says, “this is definitely my missionary field!” It has been easy to begin- having a member (Sharon) who teaches there builds a natural bridge between church members and staff. As I listened to the reality and the hopes, I was filled with a sense of possibility and promise! You will hear more on Sunday.

A week ago today, Rev. Pam Moore and a key lay leader of First Christian Church on Arrowhead Ave came and toured our church grounds. They're in the process of selling their church campus which is now much too big for them, and they hope to buy land and build a new church in the near future with the proceeds. In between, however, they will need a temporary home, and the Session approved opening conversations with them about the possibility of their worshipping in our chapel and using a classroom on Sundays and perhaps renting office space, too. Another possibility of partnership in ministry that helps us to think creatively and see ourselves and our space in new ways.

And so as we think creatively about our worship, and our space, and our outreach, we experience the Call of the One who sets us dreaming, and travels with us on every unknown road: even Jesus.

I close with one of the delights of the week. While counting the offering, we discovered an envelope that had been opened up and used as paper for a drawing- This beautiful piece of art (which I am tragically unable to upload to this blog) is unsigned, but I have a hunch the artist’s first name rhymes with ‘Capacity’. It is a cartoon of me and my colleague Eric- it hangs on my office door.

And so with laughter and love we look toward Sunday when we will gather in the presence of God and offer our praise.

Worship Renewal Events, 2010-2011

2010-08-17T15:41:00.000-07:00

For your calendars!

Open Our Eyes

& Our Hearts:

Reclaiming Our

Creative Heritage

To learn about the worship renewal events scheduled for 2010-2011, please see our brochure and

registration form.

What a Beginning!

2009-09-19T08:01:00.000-07:00

On Sunday, we ‘officially’ acknowledged our return from the many places we have traveled over the summer months, and we kicked off a new year of learning and life together. It was a kickoff to remember!

Dr. Elizabeth Nordquist talked with about 100 of us about Ancient Practices for Contemporary Christians, and urged us to consider the rhythm of Sabbath and Rest. What would it be like, in our 24/7 culture, if there really were times and places where we regularly experienced the joy and the restorative grace of the Holy One? She wondered with us about our current practices of Sabbath (or lack thereof!) and invited us to think about ceasing our ordinary work and activity, feasting on the good gifts God offers us, and embracing the world God loves. How wonderful it would be, and how transforming, if we could create safe places for weary pilgrims to cease and to feast and to embrace.

In worship, 15 of our number presented “The Bible in About an Hour”, which began at The Very Beginning (with Creation), and closed with Jesus’ invitation to follow. Along the way, we met the snake, sang about Noah, heard Gabriel visit Mary, and engaged stories of the prodigal and the wise and foolish builders. How wonderful it is to remember the long story of God’s work in the world, and the fact that our lives continue that story in our day.

And then five new members (not to mention their cool children!) stood before the community and affirmed their trust in God and their desire to walk with us in the way of Christ. Two of them were men who had never been baptized, and so we marked a new beginning in their lives with the sign of water and the ancient sacrament of naming and blessing them. One of them, Mark, has been an active participant in our common life for over 35 years. Though he had thought often about his faith, and was clear about his ‘belonging’ here, he had avoided being baptized in order to honor the Jewish parents who gave him birth. This fall, he found himself ready to take another step on his spiritual journey, not leaving behind his heritage, but affirming his present circumstance, and following the Spirit’s prompting to risk and trust in a new way.
How wonderful it would be if all of us, no matter how long we had been sitting in a pew or how long we had been following Jesus, felt like we could respond to God’s invitation to take new steps of faith.

After worship, two of us went to the chapel to offer prayers for healing and wholeness for those who wished them. It was a holy thing to welcome one after another, to hold before God a wide range of concerns: cancer, pre-school age children, broken relationships, crises in faith, physical pain and chronic illness. The Spirit of Jesus the healer was present, and all of us went away strengthened and encouraged. How wonderful it is to help one another experience the healing love of God.

What a beginning it was! We were The Church this weekend: Remembering The Story, taking new steps of faith, offering healing grace, and seeking God’s promised Rest! May all of these things continue to be visible in this church in the year ahead! So rise, and shine, and give God the glory, glory- And thanks be to God.

A Pilgrim Heads for Home

2009-07-25T12:46:00.000-07:00

I spent a week on the island of Iona, off the coast of Scotland, all by myself this summer.

I went on pilgrimage, feeling called by God to a time of journeying and reflection. I went seeking to hear 'a word' from God, I went carrying a question in my heart.

It was an astonishing trip: beautiful and mysterious and lovely beyond description. I will be telling stories over and over about my holy time on the island, I am sure.

But now I am heading for home. I have one more week away, helping to lead a conference for preachers, and then I am Home for good. The work I am beginning now is the work of re-integration.

My friend, who regularly leads groups of people on pilgrimage to seek God in the wilderness, says that perhaps this is the most difficult part. It takes a long time, and there is always the danger of simply giving in to the gravitational pull of 'business as usual'.
My friend offers this question "How does the new take root, O God?"
How indeed?

When we hear a new invitation from God, when we hear a new call or catch a new vision, how do we bring it home and integrate it into our ordinary lives? When we are convinced that a change is called for, or when we are blessed with a new enthusiasm, how do we integrate it into the living of our days?

If we want to be a vital community, directed by the Spirit and responsive to the world, this is a pretty important question.

How does the new take root?

One way is with the support of those who understand, and who share your desire to live responsively, to be in tune with what the Spirit is doing.

In the ancient Celtic tradition, those who sought to be Holy had an anam chara- a "soul friend", who could help a pilgrim listen for the whispers of the Spirit, who could lend courage and support for changes, who would pray and be present to a friend who was seeking to live in God's way.
An old Gaelic saying said, "Anyone without a soul-friend is like a body without a head."

So I am grateful today for my soul friends, for those who help me listen to my experiences and hear the voice of the Spirit, who give me courage and support when I am called to make changes, and who pray for me and are present to me in a way that reminds me of God's presence and faithfulness.

I am praying too, today, that we can increasingly be a congregation of Soul Friends, who recognize and encourage in one another the Life of the Spirit, who help each other walk in the way of Jesus.

The lectionary for tomorrow, strangely enough, includes this prayer of Paul:
" ...that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith, as you are being rooted and grounded in love.." (Eph 3:17)

How does the new take root?
Well, evidently it takes place continually, if we are willing. Christ dwells in us, and we are being rooted and grounded in love.

Thanks be to God for home, and for homecoming, and for soul friends.
May all of us bring home gifts from the Sabbath of summer.

Amen.

June 14 Living the Questions

2009-06-25T15:48:00.000-07:00

Last week I suggested that asking our real questions was hard work, that Nicodemus was not alone in having a question for Jesus that he would rather ask in the dark than in the harsh light of day with everyone watching.

I invited folks in the congregation to write their questions on paper, and place them in a basket if they wished. I read them the next day, and have been astonished at them ever since.

- Why can’t our children see life & the choices they make as clearly as we would like them to?

- Am I doing the will of the Lord as an individual? Are we doing the will of the Lord as a congregation?

- How can I help someone who has a hard time believing in God when his mother died of cancer?

The questions suggest to me that the Spirit is at work among us, that people are wrestling with questions of mission and outreach, and questions of the heart. What surprised me most was the fact that so many of them were tender and personal- some in reponse to particular circumstances, and some in response to the human condition.

- How do you know if it is time for someone to move in with you?

- How do I find my way to You? How do I know if I'v found you?

- Is God with me in my loneliness?

So I have spent the last week or two wondering about how we deepen this conversation, how we continue to make this a place where people know their questions are welcome, a place where we help each other hear what Jesus might be trying to say in response to our deepest questions.

The Adult Ed folks are thinking about ways to schedule classes that address some of the questions, and to create space in classes for discussion and conversation, so that questions can be heard and honored.

The pastors and staff are thinking about everything from preaching topics to individual conversations to the formation of small faith -sharing groups that might create more free space in which God can meet us, and speak to our questions.

Frederick Buechner has said that questions are "the ants in the pants of faith", they keep faith moving and prevent it from becoming stodgy and sedentary.

I think questions are holy, revealing what God is up to, and where we are pointed next on the spiritual journey.
I am grateful for these questions, and for the others that I know will come,
and I am grateful to be part of a community that is thinking
praying
asking
listening
and trusting.

So what question are you walking with these days?

How Many?

2009-06-04T16:56:00.000-07:00

How many does it take?

You’d be surprised.
I know I was.
Last night at the Nurture Committee Meeting, we looked over the list of names
of folks who have assisted in Education during this academic year.
There are those who rocked babies in the nursery,
those who got out paint and brushes with the middle schoolers, or sang with elementary kids, and those who worked with youth on car washes and bible studies and mission trips.

There were those who taught adults, inviting people to explore the words of the Apostle Paul, the music of Hildegard of Bingen, and the pages of the local paper, among other things.

Somehow looking at the list moved me deeply.
Looking at all the names of those who care that the gospel lives on,
those who value questions and answers,
those who don’t just SAY but DO- it was lovely.
I was moved that the ages and stages of these folks were varied, as was the number of years that they have been part of our community...
Dozens and dozens of friends of Christ have retold the story this year, and helped us to know our heritage and equip ourselves for discipleship.

This week we are reading the story of Nicodemus, who comes to Jesus by night to learn from him, presumably because he is embarrassed to ask his questions or seek help in broad daylight.
The text reminds me how much I want to be part of a church community that lets people ask their true questions, the questions that they think about in the dark. I want to be part of a place where the Light of Christ shines, and where people who are young in faith, either in years or in experience, have companions on the Way who will share what they know. Teachers. Shepherds. Learners.

And I want to be part of a community where are part of our covenant is that we are never done learning, never done growing, never done discovering the truth we live for.

This Sunday, in worship, we will recognize all 102 people who have kept learning alive among us.
How it must gladden the heart of God!

4-2-09 Looking Back, Looking Ahead

2009-04-02T13:58:00.000-07:00

4-2-09

Yesterday was the 3rd anniversary of my arrival at First Pres. When Tom mentioned it in the morning, I told him he was silly, and that no one else would remember.
And then I arrived at staff meeting, and was greeted by a cake with my name on it, and a beautiful plant for my garden, and a card with words of solidarity and grace and blessing. Wow.

It is such a treasure to work among colleagues who love one another and love their work. To gather each day believing that what we do has deep significance for the spiritual lives of people we love, deep significance for the justice we long to see in our city and in the world, deep significance as we try to point our efforts and our praise toward the Holy One. It is astonishing.

Today, one of the members of the committee that originally called me stopped in to say congratulations, and to say that it’s hard to remember when we weren’t part of the same Family. We reminisced about some of the tough times these last 3 years, and some of the grace we have witnesses and the joys we have shared. And she said this,
“And I firmly believe that the best is yet to come!”
Which is a pretty Easter-y thing to say.

Here we stand, on the verge of Holy Week:
Saturday the 4th we will fill the sanctuary with palms,
Sunday there will be a palm procession ringing with “Hosannas”
Thursday we will remember the Last Supper Jesus had with his friends, and will gather in candlelight to recall the poignant and powerful story of his last days. We will strip the chancel of all color and drape it in the black of mourning, we will snuff out the Christ Candle and leave in silence.
Friday many of us will attend the Good Friday service at noon at the Congregational Church on Sierra Way with members of the ecumenical community.
Saturday the 10th at 9 am we will transform the sanctuary from a place of mourning to a place ready for celebration, as people bring their home-grown flowers and greens to fill the place with Spring and Life and Light.
And on Easter Sunday we will rejoice, singing Alleluia with all our hearts.

We will experience the peaks and the valleys together in the days ahead. And we will say to one another, again and again: “I firmly believe the best is yet to come.”

Our deepest and truest and richest experience of God is always still ahead of us.
And one of the things that Easter means is that death is not the end- that our whole life long we can say, “The best is yet to come.” Thanks be to God.

Keys to the Kingdom- Death & Life

2009-01-29T16:44:00.000-08:00

This week at First Pres

In one of the gospels, Jesus famously gives Peter the Keys to the kingdom- a sign of authority and power. One never really appreciates the power of these scraps of metal we are inclined to take for granted, until one is without one. Or, as luck would have it, one receives a new one.

Which is what happened this week: the whole church campus is finally re-keyed. Old keys no longer work, and new ones work like a charm! We are more secure and more responsible than we were. This project was done with money left to us by Norma Lunn when she died, and I think she must smile from where she now sits, knowing this place she loved and cared for is secure, and we no longer have to puzzle over the reason for the dozens of keys we found on her ring.

I am saddened by how death touches us all. Don Inloes, pastor of Immanuel Methodist Church died this week. He was a faithful, justice-seeking saint, and I miss him- even as I celebrate the way he lived his life. After a long season of waiting, Marion Wiens’ mother Anne finally passed into the Light which guided her days. Grief mingles with gratitude for the end of suffering. Today I got word that Jo Subject, who has been living near her son in Calistoga CA, died at 93. Her life was a blessing to this community, we are both diminished and blessed at her home-going.

And there was life: I was struck by the sound of laughter at the Session meeting last night, as I was preparing soup for supper. I was moved by the tenderness that came to the surface as we met with the Keiper family and approved the baptism of baby Addison. I was grateful when one of the elders noticed that we are building trust with one another- a sign of the Spirit at work.

On Sunday, we will have our Annual meeting, a chance to sing and to reflect on what God has accomplished among us in 2008. To pray over the annual report is a humbling and joyful task.

But the report tells only part of the story. This week I got a letter from someone talking about the struggle to reveal what’s going on inside and the joy of using one’s gifts in ministry. I also sat and talked with a faithful leader about how discouraging ministry can be, and what keeps us coming back for more. And I got a note from someone rejoicing in being ‘seen’ and loved in this community. These things remind me that there are spiritual struggles and questions and victories taking place just under the surface all the time that I know nothing about. the Spirit is always at work among us, making us whole, bringing the Kingdom nearer, offering us the keys. Thanks be to God.

1-25-09 Doing Chapel Outside

2009-01-26T10:14:00.000-08:00

Doing Chapel Outside

“Didja know you could DO chapel outside, Miss Lynette?”

The 4 year old beamed with his new-found knowledge.
“We just did chapel time, and we did it OUTSIDE!”

It’s true. Last week I forgot to turn the heat on in the chapel, and at chapel time it was below 50 degrees. I knew that my fidgety friends and I would never make it through 15 minutes of singing and story and prayer under those circumstances, and so we gathered on the plaza, in the warm sunshine, and sang our songs and admired God’s creation, and read a story. It was lovely- the warm sun making the chilly winter morning more bearable, the voices raised in song making it bright in another way.

When our chapel time was done and the kids returned to our child care center, one of them encountered the director, and informed her with glee of his new discovery: you can do chapel outside!

I have been doing a fair amount of thinking about ‘chapel outside’ lately.

Nancy Wiens, a daughter of this congregation, organized a quest for clergy and spiritual directors seeking sustenance from God. She gathered them for a couple of days of preparation, and then they went out to the Borrego Springs area of the desert, as pilgrims have for millennia sought clarity in the desert. The group of about 10 spent time camping, eating, praying together, and then each of them went out for 4 days of solitude.

They slept under the stars, and they prayed. Each of them fasted, drinking only water during their solo time. They faced their fears and settled into the silence. And they watched and listened to and dwelt in the kind of chapel that you can only do outside. Their companions were the moon and the stars, the rising sun and the solid stones, the tiny signs of life and the wide sky.

When they returned to the world in which all we usually dwell, I went to greet them and welcome them back. Though most of them were strangers to me, it was clear to me that each of them had sensed the presence of the Holy One, had heard a response to the Question they had brought with them, had been filled with a blessing they were eager to share with the world.
While that kind of rigor does not feel like something I am called to at the moment, I have found myself drawn outside often for my daily prayer of late. I sit in the fresh (sometimes cold!) air on my back porch and watch the sky grow light, watch the sun bring its gift of warmth and life back to us. Or I rest there at the close of a day, giving thanks for what has been, and for the promise of rest, and for the chance to begin again tomorrow.
And here is what I have to report: God is out there. The earth is the Lord’s and the fullness of it, the world, and all that dwells therein. Did you know you could do chapel outside? Give it a try.

Peace to you- Sandy

Living "as if"

2008-12-18T16:17:00.001-08:00

Last night we had a meeting of the Session, those folks who have agreed to serve as leaders of this congregation for a while. One of the most difficult things they have to do each year is to determine how we spend the dollars people entrust to us for ministry.

In 20 years of ordained ministry, (and some pretty serious pre-ordination involvement!) I have been at a lot of these meetings. But never at one quite like this one.

In the last year, we've felt called as a church to take a number of risks: to do major renovation on our campus, to increase what we do in Mission, and to call an associate pastor. In addition, the global financial crisis has taken its toll on any interest income we might have been able to fall back on in previous 'lean years', as well as making people anxious about finances in general.

Pledges from members and friends have been trickling in as the year draws to a close, and many of them are generous, but there are dozens of folks who pledged last year from whom we've not yet heard, and what they might be able to give in '09 is anybody's guess.

And one more thing you should know: Presbyterians tend to be predictable. We tend to like order, deliberateness, level-headed steadiness. We, as a group, tend to be rather risk-averse. It makes us nervous and edgy.

Like I say, I have been at a few of these meetings before, and I know how it goes. The air is typically so tense it vibrates. People tend to say things like: "I know their work is valuable, but I don't see why Nurture needs so much money. Perhaps THEY could volunteer to take a cut in their portion of the budget." and so on. By the end there are often raised voices and hurt feelings. I hate it.

And here is what happened: They looked at this budget that is 85 THOUSAND dollars out of balance (a lot of money by any account, but huge in a 500 thousand dollar total), and they discussed it. One committee chair very graciously suggested how their committee could cut some costs in the coming year.

The discussion continued: thoughtful, theologically sound, reflective, thorough, responsible.
At the end of the conversation, they voted, unanimously, to adopt this budget, because it felt to them like what God was inviting them to do.

There was an astonishing level of balance, of civility, of trust. There was a glaring lack of anxiety, short-sightedness, or competition. They just did it.

At the end of our meeting, as we reflected on where we'd sensed God's presence, our new Associate Pastor Eric said,
"I have NEVER seen a Session adopt a budget this risky. Without fighting. Unanimously."
I nodded vigorously.
"It's as if," he continued, "You really have faith that God is involved here. And that you really trust each other. "

Yep.
It's as if there's something remarkable going on here,
something will are willing to take risks for
something we are willing to sacrifice for.
Something that invites us to trust God and each other,
that calls for the best in us
that promises a remarkable year ahead.

I do not know where all the money will come from, but I believe that this impossible sum is an invitation to rely one the One who calls us.

Lets live "As If. "

Easy Does It

2008-11-06T14:59:00.000-08:00

Christian faith is something we DO, not just something we think. "Be Doers of the Word and not hearers only", Paul says.

At the same time, it is NOT something we DO so much as something we receive: "by grace you have been saved, thru faith," scripture says, "and not by works- lest anyone should boast."

For centuries the church has wrestled with this tension and argued about this paradox:
to what degree do we rest in the grace God freely gives us?
to what degree do we strive to do the work of the gospel, to run the race of faith?

This age-old theological tension is now my lived experience, the place where God's Word is being spoken to me day by day.
This week, I have returned to work- sort of.
It is a great joy to re-connect with the work I love so deeply, to see the people I have covenanted with, to sit behind this familiar desk.
And, at the same time, its a bit scary- because I cant keep my familiar pace.

My doctor cleared me to return to work provided that I do so gradually and gently, paying attention to my energy level, which is not yet what it once was.

And so the spiritual task this week is about discernment.
The thing to which I am most inclined is not good for me at the moment.
This propensity to jump in with both feet, to believe that Faster is Better, this notion that I really need to DO more to feel good at the end of the day- will not speed my healing nor serve ths congregation- and so it cannot be what God wants from me.

So I am trying to experiment with Doing Life Differently.
Praying helps. often.
Breathing helps.
Cultivating patience and humility helps.

And each day, as I find the end of my energy or notice my weariness,
I realize that stopping helps most of all.

This 'stopping' requires trust-
a trust that God is in charge of the ministry here, not me.
a trust that I am loved for who I am not just what I accomplish.
a trust in colleagues and friends who will do what I cannot
a trust that my body is a partner and a friend, and that when it tells me I am tired, that is a loving message that helps me know what God expects from me today.

Some of this is not as natural for me as pushing ahead and pressing on-
so I have lots to learn.

But at the same time, I am aware that I don't have to be good at this or know all about it for it to work. I am aware that I am dwelling inside a miracle: a body that day by day is repairing surgical damage done to it, a body that knows how to diminish the size of this scar, a body that knows things I dont know about the mystery of what's inside my skin and how it works.

And so I am aware that I dwell inside a miracle,
and that life is a gift,
and that I am healing day by day
both physically and spiritually.

Amazing.
Amazing Grace.
Amen.

What does a Church look like?

2008-10-04T16:48:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking lot this week about what constitutes the Church,
how you know it when you see it
how it makes the presence of God discernible and tangible and real.

Jesus said, "by this they shall know that you are my disciples: If you have love for one another."
He also said, "Love one another as I have loved you. Abide in my love."

Well, that's a clue.

Turns out after a long season of trying to diagnose a problem in my body that has been as frustrating and elusive as the electrical on your car ("no, really, it was doing the weirdest thing just yesterday!")
It turns out, as I say, that I need pretty extensive surgery, and that I will do that on Monday.
The doctor tells me to expect 7 days in the hospital and a month off work. This is lots more than I bargained for, and I am working at accepting this, and trusting, and co-operating with my own healing.

At times I have been very frightened, and I know it has frightened many of the dear members of this family of faith.

Where is the Grace in THAT?!?
Well, I will tell you.

There is grace in each person who has stepped up to take something on: the stewardship campaign, child care, rides, casseroles, comfort, encouragement. There is grace as people take on ministry tasks one after another- finding preachers and teaching new member classes and even organizing the personnel reviews for staf.

The leaders in this congregation make the love of Christ visible because they make this ministry their own- they are not consumers of religious benefits or clients who come weekly for blessings. They are fellow laborers in God's work, and they witness to the fact that this work does not depend on any one person- not even the pastor. They know that THEY are called to make the love of Jesus real in this place, and they are all about doing it. They ARE the church.

This is humbling, but full of joy and freedom, and full of encouragement because it makes itso clear that God is present here, and the Spirit is at work.

I got lots of incredible email this week. Here, too, the Grace is visible: see if you can't see it.

I wish I could do this for you! But, of course, I can't, and you wouldn't let anyone else do it anyway.
So, the two of us will accompany you as best we can, along with all of the"saints" of the church and beyond.
The path is crowded with us, but there is room for more, and by Monday, the path AND THE OPERATING ROOM will be filled with us. Remember Monday, as they bring you into the operating room, to look around you and "see" us!
The surgery staff may not see us, but you will.

And the operating table? NOT! Our hands are holding you up to God!!

This, my friends, is the Church of Jesus Christ- the 'great cloud of witnesses' Hebrews talks about, the people who "bear one another's burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ."

How grateful I am for this vision of how I am surrounded, and upheld in love.
I will be leaning on each of you, my friends, and on the love of the Holy One you represent
As I do what is before me.

Meanwhile, thanks be to God and to you.
Sandy

Walking Together, Hearing the Holy

2008-09-25T11:44:00.000-07:00

THIS WEEK AT FIRST PRES 9-25-08
Since the beginning of the year, the Session has been reading a book about various prayer practices by Daniel Wolpert. It’s a lovely book, accessible but not lacking in depth. This month our chapter was on 'walking prayer'.
Generally, we talk about what we have been reading, perhaps we share stories about how this practice has (or has not) been useful for us. This time, I invited them to actually engage in the practice we were discussing. I encouraged them to leave the table and our meeting room, and to go out into the semi-darkness to walk and pray.

I gave them 3 suggestions: they could let the buildings of the church campus guide their prayer, or I suggested they might want to pray for the neighborhood. Or, I said, they could concentrate on being present, and try to notice what it’s like for them to slow down and walk at a measured pace. (I also said that they could trust the Spirit, and do ‘none of the above’ if they wished.) I turned them loose for just over 10 minutes to walk silently.

When they came back, it was so lovely to hear their reflections, to listen to where they had been led and spoken to.

One of them, who is a hard-facts, bottom-line kind of guy, recalled taking his trash out the week before, and being stopped in his tracks by the incredible moon as it hung there in the sky, reminding him of the presence of the Holy.

One of them found herself thinking of all the saints whom she had known in this congregation who were no longer with us, the great cloud of witnesses encouraging us in our ministry.

One of them found herself praying for the neighborhood and its families- and one of them crossed the street before her, children jostling and giggling as happy children do, while grownups shepherded them safely to the other curb. She sensed God’s love for such families.

One of them began by wishing he felt more of God’s presence in prayer, but then remembered God is always present, and ended up praying for awareness- for his ability to recognize and respond to God’s presence.

One of them became aware that this place which is our spiritual home is a gift to the neighborhood just by being here, that our presence (and God’s presence among us) is a gift.

And one of them prayed for the people who lived in the houses across the street. Are we doing enough, he wondered, to invite them to join us? Have we walked across the street to ask them?

I was touched by how connected I felt to these people. We were out there alone, walking independently, not speaking to one another, yet it was clear to me that we were deeply connected as we listened together for the Voice that gives us life and gives meaning to our work as a Session.

Words of beauty and of reassurance, reminders of our heritage and our call.
Words of comfort and of challenge and of discovery.
It was a powerful gift to recognize the voice of God speaking to each of us differently,
And to all of us as a community.

Surely God is in this place.
Holy Ground.

See you on Sunday~

Sandy

Wholeness and Holiness and Healing

2008-09-18T21:06:00.000-07:00

There was such a sense of sacred space, such a sense of hope and belonging as we gathered in the chapel. Twenty five of us came for our quarterly healing service. It was easy to sense God’s Spirit in our midst.

It is a tender thing to acknowledge our vulnerability.

It is powerful to recognize God’s intention and ability to heal.

It is a sweet privilege to claim that promise and to pray for one another.

Some of us were there for the first time.

Others are regulars, who love this service.

One by one, those who wish prayers for healing come to one of the stations.

The things that are offered up for prayer are so powerful-

A woman who welcomed her first great-grandchild today asked us to pray for peace in the world.

A woman who has had her share of medical intervention these last 2 years is facing yet another surgery- we prayed with tears.

An elder prayed that we as a congregation would know how to gather around and support one who is critically ill.

A strong and vigorous man facing troubling symptoms and no clear diagnosis asked us to pray for his healing.

And on it went- a litany of beauty, courage, truth, pain, and hope.

And we held each request up, and sensed the presence of the Spirit encouraging us all.

And we sang, and sang, holding one another in the prayerful music, drawing strength from Carol’s beautiful playing and our voices united.

We marked all who wished with the sign of the cross, anointing with oil as a sign of healing and gladness.

One of our number, who had never been baptized as a child, received the sacrament, and was marked as Christ's own forever.

At the end of the service, as I looked out at this small, gathered community, each one looked as if they had been in the Presence of the Holy One. It felt as if we were truly Community- One body in Christ as scripture says it. I wished they could see themselves, radiant and peaceful.

And I felt a wave of gladness and gratitude that I make my home in this place with these people- where such holiness and healing can be found and shared.

We were the Church tonight.

Thanks be to God.

The Power of Presence

2008-09-12T11:31:00.000-07:00

Where did I notice the presence of God this week?
I went to the doctor Monday, and my friend went with me.

Going to the doctor, especially if you are worried, is an invitation to know your own vulnerability and frailty, an invitation to realize how small you are. Though I look like a Great Big Grownup, it never fails to make me miss my mom, gone 20 years this fall. It never fails to make me feel small and afraid.

We all have experiences like this- part of what it means to be human and live in an imperfect world. If we're lucky, someone will Accompany us.

My friend drove and parked in the maze of strange streets and lots, she helped navigate the hallways and the questions, listened to answers and possibilities. She steadied me and encouraged me.
All week I've been thinking about what an experience of Grace that was, of how it was, in a concrete way, the presence of Christ.

This is a primary task of Christian community: to Accompany one another. To remind each other by our presence that we are not, in fact, alone. To walk together the roads to Emmaus and the Cross and the next village, just as the disciples did, knowing that Christ is present wherever 2 or 3 of us are gathered in his name.

This church knows something about that: One member spent this week with a friend hundreds of miles away, to be present for her surgery and recovery. Others of you, I know, have made visits and made meatloaf, have brought flowers and brought soup. You have showed up to pray, you have sent the card, you have served as a 12-step sponsor. But you have also sat down to coffee and listened and cared when there was no medical issue. You've helped someone be strong, hang in there, know Grace. You know the power of this, I think.

Our world is starving for this kind of grace. Our culture is full of isolated folks who need a sense of hope and holiness that only Presence can provide. Some of them don't know how to ask. How can we do this?

We do this as a community at our quarterly services for Healing and Wholeness (Thursday, Sept 18, 5:30 pm, chapel) In those intimate gatherings, all who come are accompanied, we are present to one another. We pray by surrounding each other with singing the extended, beautiful chants. We acknowledge our need for healing in body and spirit. We make space for God's Spirit ot come and stand alongside us. Always, it is a gift.

What are things that make you afraid, or make you feel alone?
Who has Accompanied you? Was it easy or difficult for you to let them?
Is there anyone you are being invited to accompany, anyone to whom you are called to be Present this week?

Let us be a community of people who help each other who accompany one another, for surely we will meet the Holy One on the way.

Love to you-
Sandy

Some Trees, a Parade, an Anniversary

2008-09-04T15:49:00.000-07:00

Into this imperfect world, sadness comes as a matter of course. The sadness has come these last several days around trees. This campus is green and shady, a spot of growth and beauty in a somewhat dilapidated neighborhood. But our trees, it turns out, are as vulnerable as we are. A couple of the liquidambar in the front parking lot looked unhappy, and so we sent for a tree expert, who pronounced that a couple of them have “bacterial leaf scorch” and that there is no way to save them. Liquidambar are vulnerable to this, it seems, and we have been lucky so far… but we need to think about removing and replacing a couple of trees- and it makes me sad. I was further saddened when our Gardening Service guy pointed out that the birch that overhangs my parking space was half dead. He pointed it out to Mimi as asked if he should trim it- and it looks dreadful and desperate, a lonely white trunk with no leaves. And finally, Alfonso showed me with pride how he had ‘pruned’ the peach tree outside the offices- to prevent peaches falling on the sidewalk and causing a hazard. His intention was good, and his ‘can-do’ spirit is evident, but I am horrified at the state of this poor old tree- and have told him that under no circumstances is he to trim any other trees without approval of Stewardship.

It makes me realize how much I love these green and sheltering friends, these reminders of Creation amid this urban landscape. And I am saddened at the loss. It seems to me this area of our life needs caretakers, stewards, a couple of people who CARE about such things and who care in a different way than someone whose job it is to keep the place tidy, or someone who mows the grass each week. The beauty of this place is part of it hospitality, something we share with everyone who lives in the neighborhood or visits the property or even drives by. Caring for our corner of creation is an important ministry. Anyone feel a call to this?

Spent time this week preparing instructions for our Processional/Parade on Kickoff Sunday (which is this Sunday, the 7th) where we symbolically ‘come home’ from all our vacations and travels and summer wanderings, and begin a new year of growing together as learners and teachers. It has been fun to imagine and to do, fun to think about the color and music and symbols and kids that will help us experience God’s presence with us in a brand new year.

It reminds me that only a year ago we were launching this 2-hour Sunday format for the first time, so that adults could have education classes, so that children could learn to worship as well as to read bible stories and do crafts, and so that those who teach children would not have to miss worship as a consequence of their faithfulness. I am struck by how far we have come- how many interesting classes and conversations have taken place for adults, how many times I’ve been thunderstruck by the number and warmth of the kids who come scampering down the aisle for Time With the Children, how gently and flexibly we have adjusted as a community. We have all had to make changes, and no one likes change, but in the main we have been kind to one another, and we have tried some new things. This speaks to me of the strength of this community, and of the Spirits ability to make us able to do more than we are capable of on our own.
I am grateful for the Nurture Committee, some of whom have worked tirelessly to make this happen, and for their sense of mission and their positive spirit.
I am thankful to all the adults who have tried something new, and have taken the time to tell me of a conversation that was meaningful, a person they have come to love & admire, or a new idea that they received as a gift.
I am grateful for parents who have done the hard work of bringing kids into worship and sitting with them, and
I am so PROUD of the many kids who can sing the liturgical music by heart, and who are getting pretty good at some hymns, and who brighten the gift we offer to God each week by their presence and wholeheartedness and beauty.
It was fun to be reminded of all these things, and to be prompted to give thanks.
Hope you have something to give thanks for as well this week.
See you Sunday,
Sandy

2008-08-28T16:11:00.000-07:00

8-28-08 This Week at First Pres

Labor Day Weekend, and the summer, which I always wait for and always revel in, is drawing to its unofficial close. As a kid who grew up with public school teacher parents, I am especially wistful as the transition draws near- the long, light days and the time to share them are my favorite.

At the same time, the arrival of Fall and the fresh start it represents never fails to grab my imagination. Though the new beginning no longer includes a back-to-school outfit, still there is much to anticipate.

First of all, there’s Kickoff Sunday, when we’ll pledge once again to share in life together: especially the learning and sharing of our faith. We will bless our learners and our teachers, and ask for God’s help to grow in grace in this new year. We’ll be helped in that endeavor by a full-on party: Lighthouse Bluegrass Band of San Diego will be with us to bring sparkle, energy, and joy to our ‘homecoming’. Band member Rev. Wayne Rice (author of several books, Presbyterian pastor, co-founder of Youth Specialties organization) will be our preacher, and after being fed by the Word, we’ll be fed by the Mariners who will sponsor a Hoe-down with BBQ sandwiches and plenty to eat. It will be a colorful, joyful, wonderful day- a terrific new beginning. How could I not be excited?

I’m also excited because this Fall we will welcome an Associate Pastor to our staff. Letters went out this week to a congregation in New York to let them know that their pastor, the Rev Eric Ledermann, has been offered an opportunity (in his words) that he cannot pass up. We elected him unanimously (Really?!? Yes! Really!!) and as he begins the slow process of his transition to this coast, there is great enthusiasm about what the Spirit will do in our midst when he arrives at the end of October. That’s still 8 weeks away, but the beginning of Fall signals that his arrival is just around the corner.

Mostly, as the season turns, I am excited that we are continuing to be who we are. Last night the Session met, and though we had lots to discuss and decide, there was such a spirit of warmth and care and gladness, that I went home grateful to be here sharing this work. Dr. Beth Liebert asked us last Sunday to work at noticing where God is present in our midst- last night’s meeting was full of signs of Grace.

Perhaps the best part was when Jim and Dawn brought their baby to present him for baptism. Their 4 year old is a veteran, having been baptized 3 years ago, and having gathered with other children at the base of the font several times since. He was able to tell me what I do when we baptize a baby, and some of what it means. A great tenderness welled up in us as we remembered that God loves us, and the community pledges its love and care for us, before we are able to understand it or earn it. As we thought about the many ways our lives are knit together: that this baby’s father was baptized here a few decades ago, that everyone present remembered Aidan’s baptism, that each of us around the table had ourselves received this grace- we found ourselves both smiling and tearful.

Grass withers, flowers fade, seasons change. God’s love endures forever. Thanks be to God that we can dwell in the midst of it. Happy Labor Day!

7-03-08 Death, Discernment, Sabbath

2008-07-03T14:54:00.000-07:00

THIS WEEK AT FIRST PRES 7-03-08
It has been quite a week-

On Saturday, many of us gathered at Bobbit Chapel to remember Ken, who died suddenly last week at the age of 41. The grief was deep and profound, as was the care expressed by the community who gathered and filled the room. It is good to know, even in our most painful moments, that we are not alone- that the community of faith gathers around us to hold us up, and that the Spirit of God accompanies us in the loneliest of landscapes. We continue to pray for Jim and Sheila as they grieve and heal, knowing that grief is not the end.

On Sunday, we celebrated our Leonard Scholars, and prayed with them for their preparation for lives of Christian service in all kinds of ways. They are in the process of discerning how to live out their sense of Call, how to honor God in their studies, their relationships, and their professional lives. It is a joy to be part of that process with them, and to know that God is using us to help shape the lives and futures of these college students.

This weekend, our APNC met with a candidate for the Associate Pastor position, and it has been exciting to think about this long-anticipated leap for our congregation in terms of a ‘real person’: what would it be like to have this person here? Would they like this area? Could they love this congregation? What kind of a leader or pastor or friend might they be? If this is The Person, how will we know?

Discernment is an art, and there are no ‘3 easy steps to certainty’ in our walk with Christ. We are invited to use our minds, our hearts, our intuition, our body wisdom, our trusted community, and our experiences and what we know of scripture to help us notice where God seems to be present and where the Spirit seems to be leading us. Our rep from the Committee on Ministry said to me yesterday, “Your committee has really done their homework- and not only that, they have done their Prayer work as well. They have taken the work of prayer and discernment seriously.” It made me proud of who they are, and of who we aim to be as a church.

Today the Personnel Committee will do my annual review. The discernment task as we sit together will be to try to come to consensus on where God has been at work in the ministry we share, and where my work has been clear and pointing us toward the Holy One; also where we sense direction being given for the year ahead: what might be adjusted or changed? How might goals be set or priorities shifted? What might I need to let go of? It is a precious thing to have companions willing to reflect on such things, and help me grow into who God dreams I might be at my best.

Tomorrow my family and I head off for 3 weeks in the forest, under the redwood trees that surround our (somewhat decrepit) old family cabin in Camp Meeker, California. I am not sure I have ever been so ready for a Sabbath season. From the time of Norma’s death last fall it seems like the pace has never slowed, as we moved to a 2-hour format, welcomed new members, paved and painted, and moved through Advent-Christmas-Lent-Easter-Pentecost and the string of deaths this spring has brought to us. My body and spirit are weary, and I am eager to be in a familiar place with shade and books and coastline and trees.

I know from experience, however, that shortly after I arrive, my heart will be filled with longing for this place and for you- for this is Home, and I carry you all with me wherever I go.

I will post a reflection or two from the cabin porch, and I will be back at the end of the month. Take care of one another while I am gone, love each other with the love of Christ.

Peace,
Sandy

2008-06-24T12:17:00.000-07:00

This week my mom and I are at general assembly in San Jose. We have met so many people who share the same beliefs as us. I had lots of fun watching the moderator election. We didn't get to see all of the election but we found out the next day the Bruce Reyes-Chow is the new moderator.He has 3 daughter which I think is very cool because it means he is very aware of youth views.
Bruce is 38 years old( which is younger than my mom! ) and a pastor at a new church development in San Francisco. He shared with the assembly that he is a blogger on his own church website and is always looking for new material.
My mom and I have also seen many family friends like Sheila Denton, Elizabeth Norquist, and even people from our own church like Larry and Melodee Kistner and Susan Skoglund. People have flown in from all over the country to be here.
I have enjoyed my experience at GA because it has taught me alot about our religion and the people who practice it.

2008-06-14T20:34:00.000-07:00

This week 6-12-08

Today we bid farewell to a lion, to one whose heart and faith have touched many of us.

Bill Leonard’s memorial service is today, and we will weep and laugh as we release him into the care of the God he trusted and loved.

The stories about him are sweet and funny and inspiring, stories of friendship in spite of disagreement, of generosity and loyalty, of his enormous heart. One of the great joys of his life was mentoring others, encouraging them, helping them along.

I know that I am different because of his support: more confident, more sure of myself. I know that I was more readily received by a congregation that had never in its 137 years had a woman pastor because of Bill’s unqualified support and love than I would have been otherwise. He gave advice when asked, he gave support always, and he was funny and loved to laugh. I miss him like crazy.

Last Sunday we welcomed in 7 confirmation students (Confirmands) into full membership in the church, and we baptized an 8 year old who asked her mother to arrange it- she wanted to be baptized. This church is a place where children thrive, where they find their voices, where they discover a faith that they can live. And this church is that way, in part because Bill Leonard (and others like him) have made darn sure that people of all ages care about such things. As I look at the row of these bright, thoughtful students, standing on the chancel with their sponsors behind them, I am grateful to be part of their lives, and in awe of what God may have in mind for them. It seems to me they shine like the sun.

I am deeply grateful and full of sadness today.

It is on days like this that I am most thankful for the promises of scripture,that do not depend on how I am ‘feeling’ or on my circumstances in order to be hopeful. The eternal God is our resting place, and underneath are the everlasting arms. Come to me, Jesus says, all you who are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.

What a good idea. Rest. And rest in the presence of the One who loves us best.

Thanks be to God. Amen.

2008-06-05T16:05:00.000-07:00

THIS WEEK AT FIRST PRES

6-5-08

“He touched people we don’t even know about, he made a difference in the lives of people we don’t even know.”

These were the words spoken by Duke’s son, as he reflected on his father’s life as we prepared the memorial service. His dad was a member of this church for over 40 years, sang something like 1600 anthems with our choir, and gave of himself in numerous ways. He was a leader, whose life bespoke service and patience and also childlike playfulness and curiosity. He died of complications after an auto accident. We miss him terrifically, and will likely miss him more as days go by.

His son is right of course. Not only about his dad, but about each of us: God gives us the capacity to use our lives to bless others and change the world. We will, like it or not, touch others whose names we don’t even know.

C.S. Lewis once said that every person we meet will one day be a creature so twisted that we will no longer be able to recognize their humanness; or else a creature of such indescribable beauty and holiness that we will be tempted to fall down in worship. This is the destiny of each of us.

And every interaction we have, he said, with everyone we meet, moves them a step closer to one of those destinies or the other.

Our kindnesses, our gestures of mercy or love make a difference. Similarly, our abruptness, our mean-spiritedness, and our thoughtlessness also matter. They touch and change us, and they touch and change others.

Kevin came in today to talk about the ability to see and love beauty that was still present in his mother, even 2 days before her death from cancer. He spoke of her capacity to see, cherish, and acknowledge small kindnesses; that a lifetime of training her eyes to see goodness and beauty held her in good stead as her life neared its close.

And in my conversation with our executive presbyter this afternoon, he said, “I am convinced that there are miracles going on all around us- but we walk as if we have blinders on!”

God is at work, my friends:

using our words and actions to touch others,

Offering us small miracles of grace and beauty,

Showing us that the Spirit is present.

This Sunday, we will baptize a young child and promise to raise her to see the gifts God is continually offering, to help her recognize the miracles, to help her know about following Jesus so that her life may touch others for good.

Also this Sunday, we will bless our graduates and give thanks for their presence in our midst as they have grown up. We will pray for how their lives will go on to touch others.

And we will confirm 7 young people who feel ready to choose discipleship and unite with this community of faith to join us on the journey.

It is a sacred journey we share, my friends. “In life and death we belong to God, by the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ. ..” May we live as people who treasure the gift of life, who know the power of our actions, who have eyes to see the miracles of grace. Amen.

P.S.- when you show up on Sunday, look carefully at the sanctuary we call home: it has a gorgeous coat of fresh paint, and looks brand-new and beautiful! a small miracle we helped make happen!

This Week 5-29-08

2008-05-29T16:38:00.001-07:00

Well, it was quite a weekend!

In spite of wildly unseasonable weather (snow?! Who has snow on Memorial Day ???) about 80 of us gathered to celebrate being Family, and to celebrate God’s presence with us.

Kids threw slushballs at each other with glee, adults sipped coffee and had spacious conversations. We made T-shirts and tiaras and beeswax candles and journals and friendship bracelets, we prayed together in morning watch and at vespers.

Stevie Earp played his guitar until we were done singing, (I am amazed his fingers didn’t fall off) and we had races and balloon games and all manner of silliness.

We were conscious of things that had changed since last year- folk like Paul and Bill who were no longer with us- and were grateful for the gift of life and togetherness.

One of the things I love best about family camp is the way we create worship together- taking responsibility for acting out scripture or making the sermon visible, the way that we sing and share in the prayers, the way children and adults together take leadership in bringing us before the Holy. Celebrating communion in such an informal setting is full of tenderness and genuineness, an affirmation that we come as we are, and Jesus welcomes us and sends us out as his own. “No longer do I call you servants, but I call you friends...”

This weekend I am the retreat speaker for the women of Upland Pres, and their candidate for ministry Lee Ireland will preach at FPCSB. I will miss you.

Peace-
Sandy

p.s.- the great photos above are courtesy of Dale Showman!