This Woman Thou Art Loosed

Having the Flu is so not cool!

2012-05-03T16:13:00.000-04:00

Ok...so I should have gotten the flu shot. My intentions were to get it, but I kept putting it off thinking that since my kids have had their's I would be fine. This is definitely not a pleasurable feeling and now I'm kicking myself in the butt for not sucking it up and willfully getting poked to avoid this feeling. Thank God for DayQuil though! I still feel extremely tired and weak but the chills have subsided and the achy feeling isn't as bad. My body is longing for rest, but having four kids and a traveling husband, that's just not possible. I am even more reliant on God during this time and praying that He will give me the energy and strength to take care of my family. Mom can't get sick and stay in bed, not when dad is on travel, so my dependence on God is all I have to continue being functional enough to take care of my children. I feel the presence of God more and He has been my comfort-I can do all things through Christ Jesus who gives me the strength Philipians 4: 13

Rest in Him...

Some Yummy New Additions

2012-03-31T11:05:00.000-04:00

Chocolate Martini Soy Candle:

I'm not sure if you have ever had a chocolate martini, I haven't, but after making this and seeing how yummy it looks and smells, I definitely will be ordering one of these the next time I go out! It's layered with two shades of chocolate and garnished with two mint leaves. The base of the cup is stainless steel and uniquely designed in an elegant swirl pattern. This would make the perfect decor piece on a bar or a dining room table centerpiece.

Spring Time Soy Candle Gift Set:

To welcome spring, I have put together a cute little gift set that includes, one votive candle scented in china rain, a handful of flower melts scented in angel wings, one unscented hand painted muffin top for decoration purposes only, a decorated tin vase, and a lady bug votive candle holder. I could see this set as a cute deocrational piece for a sunroom or a foyer, or even in a bathroom with a spring time theme. You can see more pictures by clicking on the tab at the top.

Thanks for looking!

To Etsy or Not?

2012-01-17T10:04:00.002-05:00

Ok..so I've danced around this whole Etsy thing for several months. I just could not get past the fees, but then I realized, that every shop I've come across while browsing the website has sold at least a few items. I have had several other sites with no success so why not suck it up and and test my luck with Etsy? So far it seems good! I just created my shop a few days ago and already have admirers for a few of my candles, and I'm in two circles. I'm actually more motivated now to get more candles posted knowing that the more items I have listed the better my chances at getting some sales. I included a picture of one of my most recent creations. It's warm vanilla sugar scented and it's smells so delicious!! I created a link at the top of my blog that will bring you right to my Etsy shop if you're interested in taking a look.

Let me know what you think! Ü

Finding Time

2012-01-13T11:40:00.000-05:00

Finding time always seems to be my main issue in life. I will say, that my time management skills are much better than what they were before. I guess it all comes down to prioritizing the most important to the least important. What's the first agenda of the day on your list of things to do? I start my day off with spending time with God, then school work, then cleaning, running errands, and in the midst of all of that, spending time with my family.   Oh, and can't forget my hobby/entrepreneur business. I started utilizing my smart phone by making a reminder list every day of the things that need to get done, and this has been a huge help.

I created this blog with the intentions of writing at least one post each week, but with all the other priorities that come first, it's impossible to do so. I have so many things to share about what God has done in my life, but most importantly, inside my heart. I was inspired to created this blog to offer hope for other woman who are or have been in my situation and need hope. I have gone through so much that I really should not be where I am today-happy and at peace. I should be scarred, and what some might consider, damaged goods, but I am renewed in my thinking, transformed inside and out. I am saved from the internal pain, saved from wrong thinking, saved from my past sins. It was not my life that needed to change but my thinking. My life has changed because my thinking has.

I wanted to write a quick post to let my readers know that I have not forgotten you. There is so much to share and not enough time in the day, in this season of my life to post once a week, but I will make the effort to post at least twice a month.

Life Through the Spirit

2011-11-29T11:45:00.001-05:00

I recently had a conversation with a friend about Romans 8, and the law from the old testament in the bible. Paul explains what it means to have life through the Holy Spirit in Romans 8. This chapter is one of the most important chapters in the bible I believe because it explicitly tells us believers that we are free from the law. For some, this might be somewhat confusing to grasp, and I'll admit that I am still learning how this applies to my life. The law was created by God to reveal what sin is to the Israelites. For those who are familiar with the bible; recall when God wrote the ten commandments as a guideline of the biblical principles for God's chosen people to follow.

What was pointed out to me during this conversation was that the ten commandments were not meant for the gentiles. However, this does not mean us gentiles are free to live in sin. Romans 8:1 says "Therefore, there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus" The Israelites did not have Jesus in the old testament and were required to live according to the law. There were severe penalties for those who broke one of the commandments. The laws are still a guideline for us to live by today, as it reveals if we are walking in the spirit or in the flesh. When you walk in the spirit you are under grace, but when you walk in the flesh you are under the law and will be judged by the law.

How do you know if you are walking in the flesh? Galatians 5 says the acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.

How do you know you are walking in the spirit? the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.

Blueberry Bundt Cake Candle!

2011-10-30T14:34:00.001-04:00

This is one of my newest candle creations that I just felt the need to blog about. It looks and smells so yummy that even hubby was tempted to indulge! I used all natural wax to make the bundt cake and the blueberries, and gel wax for the blueberry filling. the cirumference is 11 inches and the diameter is 4 inches. This is a nice size faux food/ tart candle so to burn it using a tart warmer it would need to be cut into pieces. I love faux food candles and think they are too cute to burn, besides the smell of blueberries is so strong coming from this candle anyway that the need to burn it wouldn't be necessary. unless of course you wanted the aroma of blueberries to fill the entire house, which would be a very good reason to want to burn it in the first place. You can find more of my candle creations at the tab located at the top of my blog. Let me know what you think and thanks for looking!

Friendship

2011-10-21T09:59:00.002-04:00

What is your definition of a true friend? Lately I have been self analyzing to see if I have done my part as a friend. Am I there for my friends? Do I do my very best to make sure my friends know that they can always count on me? Do my friends see me as someone they enjoy hanging out with? Do they feel as though they can trust me?

I have also thought about what I would like to see in a true friend and how she would act towards me. We all expect to be treated a certain way in any relationship and that's especially true in friendships. I've always expected my friends to be like me. You know the sayings goes...treat people the way you want to be treated. I figured that if I was a certain way towards my friends that they would be the same way towards me. Maybe my expectations are too high? The last thing I would ever want to do is make any of friends feel like they have to be a certain way because I'm that way. I always thought that being a good friend came naturally but I'm finding out that maybe my definition of what a good friend is may be different from others.

I see a good friend as one that understands in all situations but is not judgmental. I see a good friend as one who NEVER shares your business with anyone else unless they have your permission. I see a good friend as one who will defend you when someone is talking about you when you're not present. I see a good friend as one who doesn't make fun of you when you're going through hard times. I see a good friend as one who will laugh with you, cry with you and simpathize with you when you're upset and going through something. I see a good friend as one that will be honest with you about everything. I see a good friend as one that will help you see in a loving way when you are in the wrong.

There were so many times in my past that I needed a good friend to point me in the right direction, because they knew that I was heading into one that would be harmful for me and those I love. I needed a good friend to shine a light on my darkness so that I could see the terrible mistakes I was making or were about to make. Looking back, I can honestly say that out of all of my friends, there were only a few good ones that cared enough to speak the truth about my actions regardless of how I felt at the time. They knew that they were not risking our friendship because they knew I would eventually come to my senses and see that they were only looking out for me, and truly cared. These few friends are still apart of my life today, and while we may not talk as often as we did; they are my true friends and I know they always will be.

I am a true friend and I care about my friends. In my heart I only want what's best for them. I understand that some friends grow apart from each other and no longer share the same interest, or life has them taking different paths. This has happened to me many times but with some of them we have always remained in contact. I do not hold anything against those friends who have chosen to not keep in touch. I understand that some friendships won't last forever. There are very few past friendships that I would not ever consider picking up where we left off. Maybe just one so-called friend from my past I could never be friends with because of the degree of betrayal. However; I am one that can freely forgive no matter what happened if the person wanted to be forgiven.

At this point in my life I do not feel as though I really need friends. I have my family and they complete me. My husband is my one true best friend. We've been through so much together and nothing or no one has been able break us. I know I can always count on him and he knows he can always count on me. No one will be able to replace him.

Sex is only for the Married

2011-10-08T10:45:00.000-04:00

Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men^[a] ¹⁰ nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. ¹¹ And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.   1 Corinthians 6:9-11.

Yesterday me and my husband were having a conversation about the sexually immoral and God spoke so clearly to me on this subject. I don't think many people understand the biblical law as much as they should, especially believers. I honestly believe that so many believers are going to be shocked on judgment day when they stand before our Lord and all their sins will be revealed by His light. We deceived ourselves into believing that because we go to church, read our bibles and pray that this is enough to pull the wool over our Lord's eyes and convince Him that we are worthy of His kindom.   God sees what's in our hearts not what we try to pretray to the people around us! You can dress up the outside all you want but what do you look like on the inside? What does our God see in your heart? Are you ugly spiritually? You can't decieved the Lord, He sees who you are and He know's what's in your heart. God also reveals to His true followers a glimpse of what's going on in the hearts of those who claim to be spiritually cleansed from all their sins but are only deceiving themselves.

Mathew 17:3 says it so clearly; so many people will choose the road that is traveled frequently rather then the road that's traveled less on their way into eternity. Which road are you traveling now? You may already be taking the road that the majority of people are  traveling.  We choose in this life which path we want to take and we are already walking that path now, whether it be walking with our Lord on the road that leads to heaven and everylasting life, or walking with the world on the road that lead to destruction and death.   Which road have you chosen? If you are sexually immoral? Are you committing adultery against your Lord, your body, and your spouse? Are you greedy? Are you a thief steeling what doesn't belong to you? Do you cheat people? Do you drink excessively? Do you gossip to ruin other people's reputation? Are you having sex or thinking of have sex with the same sex? I hear so often that we are not perfect but there's a scripture verse for that too. 1 Peter 1:15 tells us "Just as He is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: be holy, because I am holy." God would not tell us to be holy if He did not know we could. God tells us in this verse that we can be like Him and if you are living a life that's pleasing to Him you are being holy.

Sex was never meant for the single. The bible calls anyone who has sex outside of marriage a fornicator.   Sex was designed for only the married according to the biblical law. The bible calls a spouse who cheats or has the thoughts in their mind to cheat an adulterer.   God is very clear on His thoughts about adultery. He hates it and He hates divorce.   Don't be deceived in thinking that you are worthy for God's kingdom if you are sexually immoral. God makes it very clear that anyone who is will not inherit the kingdom of God. What does this mean? It means you are not going to heaven if you are having sex outside of marriage, cheating on your spouse, having sex with the same sex, a drunkard, a thief, a slanderer, a swindler.

This all can be changed if you are willing to give up the desires of the flesh and practice self-control. God is forgiving and merciful. He does not want anyone to perish but for all to come to repentence. It's not too late to change your path into eternity. All you have to do is ask Jesus to help you. He tells us to have self-control because He understand that we are not perfect and will be tempted. It's what you do with these temptations. You can choose to act on them or dismiss them and know that they are from the enemy who wants your soul to join him in hell. The choice is yours. Mathew 11:13 Jesus says "my yoke is easy and my burden is light". Only when you have come to true repentence will you understand and know that it is not hard to live in this world, especially when you have Jesus walking with you every step of the way. You do not have to do this alone and it does not have to be hard but you have to want to change.

Please note: I know this post is touching on some very convicting points but keep in mind; This is not my laws or even my opinions. I am speaking on the Lord's behalf-I am just the messanger so don't shoot the messanger! If you have a problem with anything I've written take it up with Lord because I only took what He said from His word-the bible. God would love that you got down on your knees even if it was to have it out with Him.  He wants a relationship with you and He's waiting to bless your life. You can be happy and have peace, even in the most trying circumstances. John 14:27 says "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid". The world can never understand this peace but we can.

Keep on, even when it's hard

2011-02-15T17:08:00.005-05:00

I think everyone can agree with me that it's easy to walk away when things are not going the way we'd like them to. We all want to be happy, feel good, have things always go our way but unfortunately that's not always going to happen. So what do we do when the storms come and we feel we can't go on anymore? How much are we willing to go through before we say enough is enough and call it quits? I know I have reached the point many times where I felt as though I couldn't go on any longer and the only way to finally be happy is to walk away. I was tired of the hurt, the accusations, the bitterness, the anger, the lack of self control, the attitude and criticism for everything I did or said. This was no way to live and even just the thought of being alone brought me peace. I've pointed out all of these things about my husband but I do not want to leave out, that at one time I treated him the same. Could it be the saying "what goes around comes around"? Was I getting it all back because I did it all to him at one time? If so, when will this cycle end?

It all ends with me...that's right. I need to stop looking at all his faults and see what I can do to show him that I love him, even when it seems hard. Proverbs 15:1 a gentle answer turns away wrath but a harsh word stirs of anger. It's not about them, it's about us. Mathew 12:36 But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken. We will give account to God for how we treated our husbands and what we did to serve God while in this life. We serve God by serving our husbands and that means being submissive to them as they are head of the wife. We make life more complicated for ourselves by wanting to take the easy way out. The bible says that if we should leave we are to remain single unless we reconcile with our husbands.

I have wanted to walk away more times then I can count and chances are, I will feel that way again. Today, I'm happy that I did not walk away or leave because today, I know that I would have been making the worst mistake I would have regretted for a very long time. I feel this way today and tomorrow might be different but to feel this way at all says that there is always hope.

1 Peter 3:1Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives

1 Peter 4:8 Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins

The Grass Looks Oh So Apealing On The Other Side....

2011-02-05T10:56:00.001-05:00

Everyone has heard the saying "the grass looks greener on the other side" and most people know what this means. In case you haven't heard this saying before, it means that a person is unhappy with their current situation and starts looking else where for something better. This usually happens in a serious long-term relationship and sadly even in marriages.  It took me a long time to figure out this whole love thing and because of this I've made some ungodly decisions due to my ignorance and lack of knowledge that hurt my husband and my children.

Love is not a feeling and this should be understood before I continue on. Love is a choice and I'm convinced that most people go into relationships having no clue what the true meaning of love is and I was one of them.  I almost lost everything all because I was living my life according to how I felt.   No one ever goes into a relationship thinking their mate will cheat on them, abuse them, abuse drugs and alcohol, or treat them unfairly. We all want to be loved, respected, put first, and treated fairly and when we decided to start a new relationship this is what we expect.   We know that no one is perfect but when it comes to our feelings we expect people to always treat us right.

I struggled after the first few years of my marriage thinking I had fell out of love with my husband because I didn't feel the same as I did in the beginning. We started fighting all the time, we chose to put other things and people before each other, his feelings didn't matter to much to me and mine didn't to him either. We were losing respect for each other and before long, we hardly wanted to be around each other. I had thought for sure we were no longer in love and so we separated. This happened many times in the first five years of our marriage and it was easy back then because I only had one child to take with me at the time. I was hurt, sad, and always felt let down by him. I never really paid any attention to how I was treating him, all I was concerned about was how he was treating me.

I became delusional thinking that we must not be meant for each other and more and more the grass started looking greener on the other side.   I wanted those feelings I once had with him in the beginning and I felt I deserved those feelings back, and all my family and friends agreed with me. When you fall in love and experience that feeling of ecstasy for the first time you become hooked, and you soon find yourself addicted to the love high. But, when you start to noticed things about your mate that shows they are imperfect, or they suddenly start treating you differently, things begin to change and you begin to coming down for that love high.   This is when a conscious decision needs to be made whether or not you will choose to love that person or continue to live by your feelings.

There are a few questions you should ask yourself when making this decision:

1. How much am I willing to deal with?
2. Am I capable of loving him through the difficult times?
3. Am I willing to accept that we are both imperfect?
4. Can I stay faithful to him?

I must tell you that doing these things alone will not be successful and I tell you this from experience. I had to invite God into my life and my marriage and I had to trust in Him. If it wasn't for God we would be divorced living separate lives. God has given me great wisdom and understanding that the world cannot understand. One who has wisdom will acknowledge that every relationship no matter what type it is will have it's issues.
When you start looking to see if the grass is greener on the other side you should first acknowledge that if you should leave and go to the other side you are only trading one set of problems for another, and you risk getting worst problems then what you already have.

Now with all of this being said; by no means am I suggesting you stay in a relationship where you feel your life is in danger; God would never expect you to either.

Scripture verse: 1 Corinthians 3: 4-7
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

I DO!...ut oh..what did I do!!!

2011-02-03T12:39:00.002-05:00

You finally found "the one", he's perfect in every way. You spend every waking moment when you must be away from him, dreaming, thinking about the next time you get to embrace each other again. Then comes the words "I love you" and before you know it your saying "I Do". You only see joy, love and happiness spending the rest of your life with this man that makes you feel like the most important person in his life. You move in with each other and now your ready to live happily ever after. This of course sounds more like a fairytale but regardless of how it plays out this is pretty much what it feels like during the honeymoon phase.

I was fifteen years old when I found "the one" and being as young as I was I had no idea what was in store for us. I fell so deeply in love with him almost immediately there was nothing anyone could say to take me off of my love high. I met him through my boy friend, and yes this sounds horrible but it happened and to this day I have no regrets. Besides, my boy friend at the time was way too possessive and I never even considered a future with him. In fact at that time we weren't together but he wouldn't leave me alone. My mom didn't help either by allowing him to still come over and visit all because she had grown to like him. I guess I probably shouldn't refer to this person as a boy friend when things happened with his friend, even though in his mind he believed we were.

I would have never thought that my life would change so suddenly and I wasn't prepared for what would happen next. I didn't think anything of taking a pregnancy test because I never thought I could get pregnant. I was too young to have a baby so my thinking back then was, it's not possible. Both pregnancy test read positive and I was pregnant. Things got very complicated and ugly for a time so I contemplated abortion. I cringe even at the thought of aborting my baby even now, but I thank God I did not follow through with. Things started happening so fast but eventually ex boy friend left me alone and me and his friend starting dating.

This was baby number two for him and he was only eighteen. He was scared and had to immediately start thinking of how he would take care of two kids, so he joined the military. He asked me to marry him on Christmas day in 1996 and were married by the Justice of the Peace in May 1997. We've been together now for fifteen years and married for thirteen. Our oldest son is fifteen years old and we have a seven year old, a five year old, and a three year. These past thirteen years have been the hardest years so far of my life. I've wanted to quit, walk away, run away and never come back but I'm still here. My husband has also wanted to walk away and never look back but he's still here to. It's obvious that we love each other but love is just not enough. It has taken patience, long suffering, perserverance, humility and God to overcome our obstacles in this marriage.

Acorrding to Jean Warren Lindsay the author of Teen Age Couples: Caring, Change, and committment. More then sixty percent of teen marriages will fail within five years. This percentage is probably the reason why me and my husband are always asked how did we make it this far. No one thought we would in our hometown and they all let it be known but, it can be done and it has-my story is proof! Not only have we made it this far but we also renewed our wedding vows and had the big wedding we always dreamed of last July. I plan to share all of what we've gone through for the last thirteen years but please do not think this was easy because it was not even close. There were too many times to count where I was asking my self "what did I do?!?" Why did I marry this man and how could I have made such a decision at such a young age.

We will always have our struggles and I know there will be times where there are feelings of hopelessness but I vowed two times now that I would stay with my husband through the good and the bad times, through sickness and in health, until death do us part. The bible says in Ecclesiastes 5:5 It is better not to vow than to make a vow and not fulfill it. If you are married and have reached a point where you feel hopeless I'm here to tell you that there is hope. If I can do it you can to and we can do it together. : )

Scripture verse: 1 Corinthians 7:10-11 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.

Prayer: Father in heaven I pray that you bless all of my sisters out there that might be ready to give up. Replace their hopelessness with your promises for their lives and mend their broken hearts. Speak to each one according to their needs and give them peace. The bible says nothing is impossible with you so let this be their focus for now Lord. I thank You for what you have done in our lives and what You plan to do. In Jesus' name Amen.

There is hope.....