Thoughts .. Expressions...

Her Mom

2018-10-02T06:54:00.000+05:30

It is the event of a lifetime they say, ‘the marriage’

And she got married

Her mom feels lonely now

It is just nature’s way of telling us

That we don’t ‘own’ anything

She came from her womb

She grew up in front of her

She gave her a meaning to life

She said, ‘I love you‘ when she was a kid

She fought, argued and even told ‘I hate you’ when she grew up

Now, she walked away with another guy

But it's her mom who always pardons & endures the pain

For she can’t share it with anyone but burry it within herself

Let us not forget she is a ‘human’

A human life on earth who needs a moment

A moment which gives her breath to feel ‘alive’

Offering light and energy for tomorrow

To many around her

And all she need is to look at mirror everyday

To see & realize how beautiful & brave, she is!

PS: I dedicate this to her mom!

Life!

2017-07-25T08:09:00.000+05:30

It is a wonder

Wonder by itself

We try catching it

Like the way a kid tries catching the sun

The more we go closer

More farther it goes

Kid feels the sun is near

And sun is a small toy to play with

But it is when the kid run towards the sun

He realizes how far away the sun is

May be that is how life is

When we try catching it

It just goes farther away

But one thing remains

It is the breath we take

Till we take!

May be that is life!

And we need to open our eyes, ears and senses

To see what is going around!

For there is something to see

Till we take our last breath!

Pain

2017-07-12T10:24:00.001+05:30

It’s about a pain, I carry
The pain of not writing
I tried escaping
But it doesn't leave me!

I need to write
For existence
For thy self
For the source who gives me air to breath

I can foresee the long path
All I see is the light
Light which consumes me
While paving my path

I endure the pain
Pain of sleeplessness

Words are not mine
Sound is not mine neither is light
But I need to write
Write to sleep!

If you know the pain
The pain I carry

For you - my kid!

2017-03-05T07:58:00.000+05:30

This would be the first time I am writing for and about you!

Its about my first kid

The kid whom I never cared for initially!

But it’s a connection

It's something I never could understand

But it’s a connection which might be due to karma

My karma of previous life

I feel my kid’s luck is affecting me

It might be a reason for me to be alive!

It may be due to the other souls who came close to me

And who would stay close to me for ever

Ever I mean!

Now a days it's about kids breath

It’s about smile

It’s about eyes

That keeps me alive!

It’s a difference

A difference that I realize now, which i never valued before!

It’s not something I created

It’s something which happened

It’s something I got blessed with

I feel it’s all about my kid!

It’s something which came near to my soul

Without me knowing

A connection which I am getting used to!

Now it’s about the breath

The breath I take ‘in’ and ‘out’

It might be the universe

Who blessed me with such a connection

Which I 'would' or I 'could' never create

It’s a chemistry

And it just happens

Happens in a natural way

I thank the universe

And everyone on it

For offering me that breath

The breath I could have never taken

Without you, my kid!

Ann's Smile

2016-10-17T04:41:00.001+05:30

Her smile is awesome
It captures my heart
And her eyes
Which captures the attention

It mesmerizes me into a world
Which I have never experienced
It takes me to the heights
And when I look back
She was not even near me

But now since she is gone

It is a missing
The kind of missing that I have not experienced before
It is her smile
It is her eyes
It is her expression

It is just her
Her presence
That I am missing

Which I never thought I would ever miss

This is life
Life with twists

Again I miss her smile
And I miss her presence
I miss her looks and her eyes!

I wish she could be the same
But I know she could never be!

She is my niece Ann..
Ann who captured my heart with a smile!

‘Ambu’ she calls
She says things like ‘yummy’ and ‘yucky’
She is unique
She is genuine
And I feel lucky

Lucky to have her!
Thanks to you Ann!
And may god bless you
And keep your smile always

Touching Modi

2016-05-25T21:42:00.001+05:30

Its touching the way Narendra Modi speaks

He speaks from his heart

He takes pride of what he is

He has the passion

Passion to make india great

He takes his responsibility

And that too very seriously

I wish I could look at him

Look at him as an energetic worker

Who works for the nation

Who speaks for the nation

And who represents nation!

May the day come

When I can also inspire people around me

Motivate them to become what they really are

Awakening from their sleep

And to glow like a sun

In their own individual way

Brightening the surrounding

And giving vision and hope

For the future..

Way of looking

2016-05-23T22:05:00.001+05:30

Truth always remain

But it matters
The way you look at things

The glass might be

Half full
Or

Half empty

Its about optimism
Its about hope

Its about life

You might feel you lost

But its about not losing hope

Its about believing it is not the end

The way we look at things is all that matters !

Being Content

2016-05-22T23:50:00.002+05:30

Is it calmness?

Is it peace of mind?

Is it happiness?

May be it is an equilibrium

A state where you feel light

Where you feel childish

A sweet spot of peaceful happiness!

It has been a while

2016-05-21T21:02:00.000+05:30

It was not writers block

It was not postponement

It was not negative energy

It was just me

Lazing around & becoming an oxygen thief

Who kept consuming oxygen & wondering why

‘Why’ is something that kept me pondering

Even to this day from the last day I wrote

Every ending comes with a beginning

No matter small or big

Let me start again

Again to be awake

Awake in the chaotic world!

Happy Birthday

2013-06-10T01:06:00.000+05:30

After such a long time I’m writing. It has been such a long time since I listened to my mind for the words that I need to write. However, today (in fact now time is 12:20 AM, so it is yesterday as per my laptop clock) is my birthday.

I lived one more year! :-)

The below is an excerpt from my last year’s birthday blog post - bharatchandran.blogspot.in/2012/06/happy-birthday.html

“I wish
To enjoy each breath better
To become for refined (as a better human being)
To become rich (both in character as well as economically)
To donate to the poor
To sponsor an orphan”
“Having said that my dream to see the world remains and I still dream about a day when I can have a bag full of money to explore the world!!”

All the above wishes remain and I feel I should add the following as well.

I wish -
To become more patient in character & in life as a whole
To become more careful with the words I use (words mean a lot)
To learn to respect & value each one who come across in my life
To touch many lives
To bring a change in this world (even if it is too small)
To become a leader (to lead like-minded people & to be a part in achieving their dreams)
And to become ‘Great’ in life!

I know my list of wishes are getting longer. May be, that is the way of life. Our list of wishes will become longer as we become older.

I do thank everyone who thought of me, wished me, gifted me, sent me ecards, emails. Above all, I thank the souls who take care of me- whether they are near me or far away from me.

This birthday was so different - I got many surprise gifts- cake, wine, well.. list is too long & I never expected any! And that is the way of life!

Light! - I have always dreamt about my guiding light - I hope there will be light in my life & it will show me the way when I am lost in darkness!

Happy Birthday

2012-06-10T03:45:00.000+05:30

I lost more hairs (as per my friend Prasad Babu) and I got one more year added in my age field as per me :-) So yes, as you might have understood, today is my bday.

The time walks out of your own life so fast no matter whether you enjoy each moment or not.
The change happens no matter whether you bother about it or not.
So enjoy, cherish and feel each moment ... that is all we can do..

I wish
To enjoy each breath better
To become for refined (as a better human being)
To become rich (both in character as well as economically)
To donate to the poor
To sponsor an orphan
Well…. Today .. my birthday is almost over.. The facebook gifted me with a lot of friends who send their messages .. Thanks to everyone…

I went to watch Prometheus movie with Steve Moss … Well, the movie was good as well. After several years I watched a 3D movie.…

As we grow, we realize that the things that we fancied during our young days are changing. I usually gift myself something on every birthday and on this birthday I couldn’t even find one gift :-)

Somehow, today I felt that it is not always about earning more money, but about having a good life which matters.

Yes, money does matter,but not beyond a point. Having said that my dream to see the world remains and I still dream about a day when I can have a bag full of money to explore the world!!

Why marriage?

2012-06-01T20:09:00.000+05:30

Days, weeks, months and years are counting. I’m becoming older. Another year is just passing away. I never bothered about getting married; in fact I was always searching for my own eligibility to get into a social institution like marriage. (I wrote this about two years back -http://bharatchandran.blogspot.com/2009/12/marriage-personal-view.html) Yes, I know, the above said statement might be sounding weird. What to do? That is the fact.

Off lately, I feel something different. I am not sure how well I can express the same by keying in the words here. However, let me give a try to portray my version.

While I have been living all these years, I met several people. Among them, there were many girls/ ladies. Some of them were interesting to me. At times, I used to think that I am something special and so the ladies whom I chose to talk to or spend time with also needs to be special. I mean, special in its own way. When the time passed, I realized that the ‘specialness’ that I carry is nothing but uniqueness.

Well, everyone in this world is unique. So then, it made me conclude that everyone is special!

I am just one among them. When I say one among them, it was more of realizing that I am also a normal human who has crazy concepts and ideals in life which might or might not be practical. To feel great about myself, I used to create visuals, scenarios, dreams around me so that I’m the so called ‘One’, who is so special to attain something which is impossible or undoable for a normal being.

I know the sequence of above words might have made you travel to a very confusing world. Well, that is the kind of world that I live in.

One of my friends told me years before that I complicate simple things and then I try to figure out how to get out of those complications. ‘Why do you create these complications in life?’ I was asked. I never realized nor understood the meaning of that question then.

Now, I stand in a junction where I need to choose a road. The two roads lead to two different ways of life. – I need to choose one.

From Sivanasamudra_Talakkavery_1Nov2009

Which one should I be choosing? The one with a friend or the one alone?

I still don’t believe in the institution of so called marriage. I redefine it in my own way as living together with a friend with all the benefits of it :-) you know what I mean. Come on, that is not the only thing that I meant. Well, I think I need the following

Someone to talk to
Someone to discuss things
Someone to be there to share the food
Someone to give a company while travelling/ driving
Someone who can share the music
Someone who can give company for watching movies – and of course discuss about it afterwards
Someone who can suggest the new ideas in the books
Someone who can inspire
Someone who can help me grow better Someone who don’t mind polishing the rough edges that I have (without my knowledge :-))

The list goes long. In a nut shell, I think I should choose the road with a friend than being a solo traveler.

And if in case I get a person who is also into a similar search, maybe I should get introduced and then tag along!

I think, I will like it when I have a candle light dinner at a sea shore while I the sound of sea waves whisper in my ears, the cool breeze sweep over me, watching the face of other person in that warm light of candle.

PS: I'm writing something after a long break- Not sure why I was not writing all these days, but again I'm glad I could start writing again. It eases my heart and gives me peace !

Way of looking

2012-06-01T19:59:00.002+05:30

Sea wave 1: ‘Look, I am feeling scared’
Sea wave 2: ‘Why are you scared?’
Sea wave 1: ‘I am going to die when I hit the shore, I feel afraid. Are you not afraid?’
Sea wave 2: ‘Why should I be afraid? I am not just a wave but part of big ocean, no matter which shore I hit!’

From Kanyakumari

When waves crash onshore they don't die – They then retract, as they are reborn in a sense and reunite as part of the ocean.

So, why are 'we' afraid or scared in life? We are all a part of one universe.

PS: I was reading ‘letters to sam’, and this excerpt came from the book.

In Love

2012-05-25T04:37:00.000+05:30

I ask 'why' to myself
And I try finding an answer
When I answer, I add ‘may be’
Now, 'why' & 'may be' became my world
They have become a part of me

As time progressed,
My list of questions kept increasing
And my list of answers kept decreasing
After all these years of my life
I realize, I have fallen in love

From Single

In love with my curious mind
In love with the questioning mind
In love with my thinking mind
Regardless of the answers
I love them unconditionally
For my thinking, questioning mind has become a part of me!

And I ask myself,
How can I not fall in love?
For who is there to love thy mind & its questions?

Freedom

2012-05-25T03:16:00.000+05:30

We look for comfort
Comfort at every nook and corner in life
We assume we are normal
Though we know we are unique
We lead a life which ‘appears’ to be normal
Though we like to cross the boundaries
And go beyond the social status quo

From 1 Apr 2007 Ranganthittu Bird Sanctuary

In this busy world we live in
We need to create a space
Where we refill our soul
And regain our strength
No matter whether we are alone
Or with someone in life!

What am I looking for?

2012-05-24T09:01:00.000+05:30

I keep looking around
Around the world I see
I try to go away
I try to hide
I try to put a mask
And I try to close my eyes
Just to dream about a world
Where I can get what I wish for
Where I can be what I want to be
Now I opened my eyes
And looked around

From Macro

I realize I am where I am
And I have a long way to go
To be where I wish to be
Again, I remind myself
Everything is just momentary!
Though, I long for the moments!

Quit

2012-05-23T21:52:00.000+05:30

I want to quit
I wish to quit
I long to quit
But I compromise
I see the positive side
I look for the spark
And the sparking moments ignites my soul
Though I feel I should quit
I am human
And I am alive

I am learning how to quit
While living within the four walls of darkness
I continue my search for the light!

Awards matter?

2012-05-11T00:16:00.001+05:30

I got lucky to be a part of 3 Solitaire awards in my organization. Honestly it is all about the team work.
I remember the days
When I was sleepless
When I used to wake up in the mid night
Thinking about the families who might get affected
For those who will need to get their sister’s marriage done,
For those will need to clear their loans
Who will get a pay hike, if we win a deal!
It is all about winning,
Yet it is all about the hard work
It is all about the sleepless nights
It is all about the dreams
It is all about our sweat
We all will get to understand the meaning of the word
The word ‘deserve’ which has lots of meaning
Which we learn to know what it is..

From Thiruvannamalai

Life is long and we learn how to live it
Yet these awards boost our morale
It gives us extra energy to work more

‘Woods are lovely dark and deep
But I have miles to go before I sleep’ – this echoes in my ears.
Thanks to the world and the people who are there with me
I bow in front of all of you!
It is all because of you all…

Heart and Soul

2012-05-06T14:48:00.000+05:30

After a long time… After a very long time I am feeling like writing.
I always used to feel that unless I feel the urge to write there is no point in forcing myself to write for the sake of writing.

I was busy working on a large case for the last couple of months … Well, I am not sure whether it is a right thing to put heart and soul for a project or an activity that you do in office.

I personally got involved emotionally into work. For this project I was really really really involved. ( please note, I used really three times to stress that I really got involved :-) )

Now coming back, I called my friend Mustansir and told him that ‘ Mom and baby is doing fine!’ – Now you understand how happy I am – we got the letter of award of the contract- Trust me this project has been like a dream to me, it has been like a baby to me - till we get the contract in hand (or get the baby delivered in hand), we get tensed and go through the labour pain.

Once you write an exam, you go through painful moments - Trust me, it is a different kind of pain. You think again and again and feel that you should have done this differently, you should have worked more harder, you should have done things in right time, etc etc..

The list of work we ‘should’ have done is endless, but again, the time is over and there is no going back..

So today, I feel happy. I just feel happy that I could put my heart and soul to a dream to be a part of the largest petro-chemical plant ever built in this world.. And I hope and I wish and I dream that me being a part of it will change my life…
It is always good to sweat a bit and feel happy when we feel that our sweat was worth…

May be life is all about putting our heart and soul and dreaming about it and going through the pain of sleepless nights to feel happy in the end!!
As someone said, it is not the ‘kill’, but it is the ‘experience of hunt’ that matters…

PS: After all life is short and we need to enjoy each bit of it- whether we succeed on our goal or not.. It is worth experiencing it. Thanks to each one of you for going through my scribbling after such a long time. I personally thank you for spending time in reading this.

Sunset at Helsinki

2011-08-28T10:16:00.000+05:30

The sun was up there when the time showed 8 PM,
The rays of sun were becoming weaker
The cool breeze walked over us
We could hear distant voices of kids

I kept the luggage from Saudi Arabia down
And sat for a while at the Helsinki beach
Watching the nature’s calmness
To regain the strength to get up and travel towards Tallin!

Sunrise at Frankfurt

2011-08-25T11:04:00.000+05:30

It is early in the morning
The sun is still rising up
I stood inside the glass enclosure
Watching the Lufthansa Boeing air crafts
Some landing, some taking off

From Frankfurt

My ears were kept busy with announcement of ’flug numbers’
I walked around the long busy terminals from A to D
I embraced Frankfurt
And welcomed my first sun rays at frankfurt!

Ps: Flight in german is Flug (we will hear it as fluke)

Sun rise

2011-08-23T22:27:00.000+05:30

I went into isolation
I restricted my thoughts
I restricted my beloved blog readers
I tore away all the strings
I wanted to hide & vanish
I wanted to close all the doors & seal
It was the darkness I embraced

There were arms around me
Which I neither valued nor realized
But when darkness walked in, those arms came visible
It gave me the warmth for a peaceful sleep

Now, I am back,
Again to the real public world
Thrashing all the worldly prejudices
For assuring I am myself
And we are what we are
No matter what happens
It is the element of goodness in us
Which will keep us alive
For watching the next sun rise

From Nature

Today, right now, I am about to commence a journey
A journey to watch a series of sunrise
Each day from each country
For the next fifteen days
And I hope I will get myself back
While I watch those sun rises
From different parts of globe!

An Update

2011-07-08T14:04:00.001+05:30

Dear Reader,

You are able to view this post because you are subscribed to my blog. Thanks for the inspiration and support you have provided me. I treasure and value all of them.

After several years of public blogging, I have reached a stage where I feel my writings have gone beyond the limits of public view.

So, I have decided to restrict the reader permission to invited viewers. If in case you are interested in viewing my blog, kindly drop an email to bharatchandran@gmail.com.

I might continue blogging on restricted topics and will be posted in this site (http://bharatchandran.blogspot.com) which will be available for public view.

Thanks once again for your support.

Regards
bharat

PS: When we go through different stages of life, we might change our views. Kindly consider this attempt of mine as a change in view towards my public blogging.

Search

2011-07-07T09:32:00.000+05:30

'Is this life?',I ask myself
The journey continues
Searching for answers
Many people came in life
Many passed through me
Many said bye and never returned
I am alone, I know

Something is haunting me
I don’t know what it is
For I am living
Searching for answers!

Dream

2011-07-06T09:17:00.000+05:30

My eyes are closing
Eye lids are becoming heavy
I tried and tried and tried again
To open my eye lids
But I couldn’t
So I opened my mind’s door
To see what is in there

I saw a light tower
I welcomed the light as my travel guide
A guide who doesn’t speak
A guide who will show me the way
Way towards the sea shore
For I dream of going around the world!