Three Hundred Sixty Five One Photo at a Time

2011-08-18T18:09:00.001-07:00

- excuse the typos...posted via Windo's iPhone

Vacation

2011-08-13T21:36:00.001-07:00

Onward

2011-07-27T00:50:00.001-07:00

It is becoming all about them. I have resigned that it is a subject not of choice but of necessity.

Just back away from the technology

2011-07-21T18:54:00.001-07:00

In the middle of nowhere and still can't put the camera down. It's an addiction.

- excuse the typos...posted via Windo's iPhone

Rare moment

2011-07-14T19:42:00.001-07:00

Sometimes, just sometimes, there is a rare moment of genuine affection between the siblings. I likely won't see it again for years but it is nice to know that it exists...sometimes.

- excuse the typos...posted via Windo's iPhone

Just saying...

2011-07-12T11:20:00.000-07:00

A friend asked me if I had been shooting lately. Although I will never stop taking photographs, I haven't been as prolific as I was during my year long 365 project. My intent in the last couple of months was to morph the blog project into a book, but time flies and still no book. I thought, may be, just may be I would think about posting again...

365. Life goes on...

2011-02-06T18:32:00.000-08:00

I have thought about this post for one year now. I thought about what it should be called and what kind of image should represent all my hard work. Three hundred sixty five days straight of my photography - it is unbelievable to image I am here.

When I wrote up this morning I thought I came up with the perfect title... "The End". Isn't that how all stories end? I had the title, so it was just a matter of coming up with the photograph. As usual life got in the way of today. Plans changed, my mom cancelled on me, Curtis made me angry, the washing machine broke, Abbey was grounded...I ended up alone in my bedroom folding eight loads of laundry. And this day I waited for for one year came and was like every other day in so many ways. Nobody got the memo to stop and remember it was special for me. But that was kind of the point, right? Life kept getting in the way of my passion and if I wanted to make photographs I would have to make the time no matter what life handed me. I can't help but think that I am quietly putting this project to bed as 80 million people are watching the Super Bowl.

Thank you to all my friends, family, and students that kept me going, that helped me understand that I could do it.

364. Sisters

2011-02-05T23:49:00.000-08:00

363. Wonderland

2011-02-04T22:40:00.001-08:00

Too many glasses of wine and advice from myBFF that confirms I don't really need to write...a picture alone is worth a thousand words. So good night and only two posts left. Yeah!

- excuse the typos...posted via Windo's iPhone

362. In a Pinch

2011-02-03T21:56:00.000-08:00

Last night I watched a film that focused on our dismal K-12 educational system in America. Today, I listened to the chancellor of our college talk about the future of the California Community Colleges - more promising than K-12 but also quite possibly dismal. There are so many challenges and so many directions that legislators can make the community colleges head that it is dizzying. The chancellor's speech was meant to motivate us to embrace technology and the opportunities that are on the horizon - initiate change. But there were warnings of so many ways it could all go wrong.

Since Obama's State of the Union speech last week I keep hearing references to America reclaiming its spot as the top nation and much follow-up discussion if this is even possible. For the past several years working in public education I have been trying to maintain a positive attitude. Nose-to-the-grind-stone, just-wait-out-the-storm, and pull-yourself-up-by-the-bootstraps attitude, but it getting hard to keep-my-chin-up as the budget crisis continues.

Keep-your-fingers-crossed that education the future of education in California is not as dismal as it appears to be.

361. Homework

2011-02-02T23:38:00.000-08:00

Katie and I got in a big argument today about homework. As kids go, Katie is fairly easy when it comes to homework. Every now and then she procrastinates and then it piles up and then she is behind and then... well you get the picture. Last night I must have reminded her about homework ten times. As she was playing on the computer she swore it was all done. Then of course tonight she looked at her agenda and discovered that there was a lot more there then she had expected - shocking! I am not a big fan of homework for children grades 8 and lower. I think that kids should practice at school and only if they are having difficulty with concepts should they bring it home. Project based learning is great for home - not worksheets. But if Katie's teacher is requiring homework she has to do it.

After our big blowout I ran to meet Curtis and watch a new documentary making the elementary school circuit called, "Race to Nowhere." It is a critique of our educational system. And much of what it claims is true, but much of the movie is based on anecdotal evidence and the perspective of upper-class white families. The argument then is deeply flawed if applied to all, but relevant to the upper crust. Here is the gist... homework is busy work, parents are over scheduling their kids, kids are suffering from stress related illnesses, and kids are cheating to keep grades up in order to get into college. All this stems from the "No Child Left Behind Act" that created an educational system is based on rote memorization of standards and not the process of teaching creativity and critical thinking. Through out the film I found myself oscillating between nodding in agreement and shaking my head in disagreement. The movie was able to point to many flaws in our educational system that need changing - I only wish that it made a stronger data based argument so that more people will listen.

360. Imagination

2011-02-01T21:56:00.000-08:00

My daughter Abigail is an amazing little person. She is so kind, sweet, and empathetic. When my mom is in her other world and I am so frustrated by not being able to communicate with her, Abigail can jump right in and talk to her. I am sure a lot has to do with the fact that she is only 8 and can call up an imaginary world herself. I worry about the effect this will have on my children - watching their Grandmother slip further and further from reality. It stresses me out, but Abigail seems to go with the flow.

359. What was I thinking?

2011-01-31T21:25:00.000-08:00

On Wednesday I have a presentation to give to my educational colleagues about my blog. Months ago it seemed like a good idea - now I am not so sure. I called the presentation, "Blogging, Creativity, and the Power of Practice". What the heck does that mean? And what did I (and my students) get out of this ordeal that I can quantify and discuss in front of other college professors? What was I thinking? Have I been thinking?

The weird thing is this last couple weeks I don't feel I have much to say. Normally I am fairly opinionated and it is hard to shut me up. Sure I had days in the last year where I didn't want to stay up late and write, but I usually had something on my mind. Lately... blank. With seven posts left to go why does writers block have to set in now. Why not a week from today when, for the first time in a year, I won't have to write a nightly post.

358. Neck

2011-01-30T21:04:00.000-08:00

In one of my online classes I ask students to post a famous photograph and discuss its importance. While I was reviewing posts today, one of my students posted the image that Man Ray took of Lee Miller's neck. She discussed that the beauty of the photograph came from its simplicity.

Some nights I sit here night after night trying to come up with a good idea and it is nice to be reminded that some of the best works of creativity are based on simplicity.

357. Profile

2011-01-29T20:17:00.001-08:00

A view we rarely see if ourselves - our profile. I had to use Curtis' iTouch to compose the shot. It has two cameras and is great for self-portraits. It lets you point the camera at yourself as you are taking the photograph. Dwayne Michals would think this was cheating.

Any way - the shot is ...no make up. No shower. Hair au natural. No vanity.

- excuse the typos...posted via Windo's iPhone

356. Waste

2011-01-28T22:19:00.001-08:00

So much of this week was a waste of time. I spent hours on the phone reporting the theft of my purse and belongings. Today was a two hour trip to the DMV. New technology promised to make the long lines at the government office a thing of the past, but it didn't seem to deliver. First, I tried to make an appointment to get a duplicative license. The first available appointment was for mid March. With no other choice I looked up the wait times for each DMV office on their website and with a published time of 22 minutes I headed over to wait this morning. It took 36 minutes just to get in the door. Once off the side walk it was another 90 minutes to finish my deed. Insane. During the whole experience I could only think how easy it could be. It's a duplicate license... Couldn't I just file online? My home address is already on file. If they want proof I (as opposed to someone else) ordered the document a kiosk that reads my thumb print would work. So much of the paper at the DMV (and the paper pushers that work there) is unnecessary.

I guess in this bad economy we are trying not to lay more people off but this system needed an overhaul.

Oh yeah it will take two months before my new license arrives.

- excuse the typos...posted via Windo's iPhone

355. Self

2011-01-27T21:17:00.000-08:00

I was thinking that since this year long blog has been all about me and my life that may be the last week of images should be all self portraits. It seems like a good interesting idea tonight. By tomorrow I may change my mind. I am allowed to be indecisive and fickle at times.

354. Window

2011-01-26T23:36:00.000-08:00

I went on the most beautiful hike today and returned to my car relaxed and full of peaceful and quiet thoughts. Until I noticed that my car window was shattered and my purse was gone. The rest of the day was wasted with calls to banks and insurance companies. It is hours of my life that I will never get back... along with my favorite handbag. Sometime in the next week I will have to spend hours in line at the DMV or wait for the next available appointment in March to replace my drivers license. Ug. I can't even remember what I had in my bag, but there is a lot of stuff that I carry around everyday.

353. Out of Steam

2011-01-25T23:47:00.000-08:00

I am out of steam for many reasons. In my dreams I saw the final days of this blog as the best, the peak of all my posts. But honestly I haven't been into it for the past couple weeks. I just want the project to be over. To say that I did it - I posted for every day for one year straight.

Tonight I needed a photograph of Katie for a middle school application. I ended up scanning my hard drive for over an hour. I realized that the reason I started this blog was to start giving myself permission to take time for myself, for my photography. The insanity of posting everyday started by accident - some misguided compulsion. What I realized tonight by looking at thousand of photographs was that I did take some really good images in the past year. This blog should have been capped at 200 days... that is when my steam started to cool and my images started to pale.

352.

2011-01-24T21:53:00.000-08:00

351. Brother

2011-01-23T22:02:00.000-08:00

My big brother David. In our mother's living room on a Sunday in January. Our brother Matt tortured us through most of childhood. Matt was cruel and got away with everything. Dave and I bonded in our frustration and we always got along as long as we didn't discuss politics. I am on the left. He's on the right. But being a conservative is one of his only faults. We live in the same city and both teach at the same college but it is odd how little time we get to spend together.

350. Guilt and Shame

2011-01-22T23:30:00.000-08:00

My mom convinced her aide worker to bring her by for an unexpected visit. I have a bad cold and had barely woke up from a much needed afternoon nap. She wasn't making much sense. She talked for several minutes about things we couldn't quite understand and we convinced her it was best to go back home and rest. She agreed and left. I didn't ask her to sit down and talk. I didn't invite her to stay for dinner. She seemed more like a stranger at the moment than my mother. I went and laid back down until my own brain fully woke up. And then I became overwhelmed with guilt... or was it shame? She probably needed familiar family more than anything.

I am half Jewish and half Catholic. A friend that shares this similar up bringing and I decided that in the end this leads to a life of guilt and shame. I already wrote about guilt in this blog months ago, so today, it's shame.

349. Time flys

2011-01-21T22:20:00.000-08:00

My brother called on my cell as I pulled into my drive way. We spoke for the next two hours. The conversation was about our mother and necessary, but at the end of the day I wonder where the time went.

348. Freud was right

2011-01-20T20:43:00.000-08:00

I try and fool myself. I try to tell myself that I can handle anything. But Freud knew a century ago. It all comes back to Mom. I try to disagree, but in the end… at the end of the day… I know that I miss her so much. I wish I could just predict which version I will meet. As my brother says, version one or two. Version 1.0 is the pediatrician, ever patient, doting mother, and insanely intelligent. Version 2.0 delusional, hallucinating, nonsensical, argumentative and often angry. The personality doesn’t change day-to-day but hour-to-hour. I picked her up early this morning for an appointment. She was in a difficult, moody, and angry all the way to the doctor’s office. We went out to brunch after – she said little except to patronize the waitress for putting lingonberries on pancakes instead of spaghetti. I dropped her home and bravely asked her over to dinner tonight. At 5 when she arrived I got version 1.5 – somewhere in between impossible and lovely. And I’ll take it.

347. Rock solid

2011-01-19T23:33:00.000-08:00